To trim or not to trim...

[Rybe]

So here's my story. My hair was the picture perfect case of benign neglect it was doing FABULOUSLY. Unfortunately I was so neglectful in my...benignness I don't even remember what shampoos did well for me to go back to them. I wasn't paying attention. Then my wedding happened. Compounding stress with the fact that shortly before my wedding I bought a shampoo that didn't do too well for my hair, but visually it made my hair look fine, so I kept with it because I was too scared to experiment so close to the big day.

Then I got married and went on my honeymoon, in which time it took a thorough, thorough beating, and I didn't have the supplies necessary to deal with it since my shampoo was crap, and because I was still new to lurking around here In the past there would have been no question, just hack 2 inches off and call it good. Unfortunately I don't think a micro trim would catch that much of it. I've also been noticing the damage seems to be on the top layer at all lengths (which is infuriating) and the REALLY obnoxious part is I've been really into trying to do fun updos and stuff, but because my hair's so thick for many updos I've found I need like an inch or two more length to pull them off successfully. Even fall backs like the lazy wrap and to a lesser extend spidermom's bun (on the rare occasions I can do it, I think my fingers aren't long enough, and I have big hands) slowly unwrap themselves. Which I guess means my hair can't be THAT damaged, since it's still such a slippery turd...But more length would help keep me from getting a rooster tail sticking out of the back of my head.

I've been trying to S&D but it's starting to feel like an exercise in futility since F+iii=a crap load of hairs to go through.

I switched to shampoo bars recently too, which seems to have washed out all the cones or whatever exactly was sealing my hair together before, making it more visible Unless they magically made my hair explode, which I sincerely doubt considering all the recent mechanical damage.

Maybe this is just another sign telling me I need to try cassia.

So...wow that was a long story.

TL;DR: Hair splitting, but want length NOW for up-dos. To trim or not to trim!

[Avital88]

you want length? answer: no trim

[spidermom]

Start doing very small trims on a regular basis; that's the best way to maintain a bit of thickness and good condition in the ends.

I hear you about S&D! I have lots of hair, too, and looking through it almost makes me cross-eyed. The easiest way to S&D is when my hair is in braids. When split/damaged ends stick out, I can see and get to them.

[Amber_Maiden]

you want length? answer: no trim

Agreed. Sometimes you have to live with damage to get length. If you care about the health of your hair more and how it looks, you trim. Sometimes you have to sacrifice something.

[ibleedlipstick]

I am in the same position. Benign neglect worked so well for me for two years, and I'm just now starting to show damage. Right now I'm looking at maintaining. Every two months I will go in and have an inch or two taken off (my hair grows reasonably fast.)

I like my length, and don't want to sacrifice it. But I also dislike the splits.

[jacqueline101]

I agree you have to decide health or length then follow through.

[shikara]

Have you decided yet? I compromised - i cant believe what a difficult decision it was, and still is sometimes! Overe the past yrar, Ive grown three inches, cut three inches, and gave as much loving care to my hair and i possibly could...

[Kristin]

I would do as Spidermom suggested and trim a bit at a time. I can't handle splits. They'll travel up your hair anyway; better to get rid of them now.

[PaganPriestess]

I am in the exact same position. I was ignorant and blissfully using cones without having any idea what I was doing to my hair. I have two shampoo bars in the mail on their way to me. It'll be the first time I've ever been off the chemicals in regular shampoo. I've been doing some clarifying treatments the last few days to try to prep for the new bars. Ugh my hair feels nasty trying to wash out 27 years of buildup. I have been debating on cutting some length to get rid of the little bit of damage at the end and blunt off my hemline. I need to decide on whether I want to try to grow with a blunt hemline or just let the fairy tale ends win out and stop trimming all together. I need to get some scissors so I can start doing some s&d and catch splits before they get worse.

Have you tried oiling at all? I have been getting good results from doing overnight olive oil treatments. I rub oil into my hair, mainly the ends, the night before I plan to wash it. Then I put it up in a bun and let the oil work it's magic overnight.

What kind of shampoo bar did you switch to?

[Jesabel]

I'd maybe do a little trim and then go on for some length, it is annoying but if your ends are damaged it may affect the growth. Obviously it won't affect the actual growing of the hair, but the length you see coming from it. When my ends were damaged I didn't trim for a whole year yet I didn't get nearly as much growth as I should have.. because the ends were splitting and breaking off. Best to trim them now before they just get worse.