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Thread: goal insecurity

  1. #1
    Ebathena Scrooge owlathena's Avatar
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    Default goal insecurity

    I'm really uncomfortable sharing my hair goals with people IRL. The only people who know about my goal length are my two very best friends.

    Whenever a friend or acquaintance compliments my length, one of my very best friends says "You think its long now...she wants to grow it to her butt!" And it makes me really uncomfortable. I cant really explain why it upsets me, but it does. My hair is such a personal thing to me, as I suspect it is for many of us on here.

    I talked to him about it, he didnt realize that it bothered me and didnt understand why. I told him that telling people my hair goals was comparable to telling them my weight goals or something equally personal.

    He thought I was being ridiculous. Its just hair.

    And maybe I am being ridiculous.

    So...anyone else uncomfortable with being forced into sharing their hair goals?
    Last edited by owlathena; September 23rd, 2011 at 12:21 AM.

  2. #2
    Member mallorykay13's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    Me for sure. I tell people that I care about that my goal is Hip. No one knows its actually classic.
    22"(start)..36"(BCL)...39"(TBL)...42"(Classic)
    Only 6" till I reach Classic. On the last "hump".
    Participating in: No trimming 2015/2016!, Wear hair up for..., & Stretching washes.


  3. #3
    Member longhairedlady's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    I tell only very few people that I am growing it long, and even they dont know just how long! I dont tell everyone because most comments I get about my hair being long are somewhat negative.
    1c/~C~iii


  4. #4
    Member QueenJoey's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    I tell people I just want to grow it out. No one IRL is aware I wish for drag-on-the-ground-two-feet-behind-me length

  5. #5
    Member Lisa R's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    Yes! I would have to agree. I actually don't tell anyone except my husband unless someone does ask me which they never have - yet!!

    I would feel the same as you if my friend made that comment in front of me to someone else. It is a personal thing and I would feel uncomfortable and maybe embarassed. That's just me.

  6. #6
    Member fluffybunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    The annoying thing is when someone you've shared something with thinks it's Ok to go repeat that in front of others. I greatly dislike that when it happens. I really think they know better than they're trying to tease you for "fun".

    But yeah, I avoid publicizing my hair goals. I recognize it's a bit weird and I'm more likely to get "why on earth would you want to do that?" than "oh, cool!"

  7. #7
    Member growingpains's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    I'm not never forced into sharing my goals, but I am a bit uncomfortable sharing my goal with people. When asked how long I am growing it I always kind of gesture around my hips at the same time as looking up expecting to get chastised or get negative reactions. So far only my dad thinks my goals are too long. My bf, however, is totally on board and when I suggested the other day I may want it longer than hip he was like "the longer the better" which made me happy.

  8. #8
    Sober Lush Extraordinair AnqeIicDemise's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    Yeah, I don't say much about it either. I made the mistake of posting a goal progress picture on FB the other day. One of my closest friends said that she never knew of me to be so obsessed with my hair in the last few years. I am sure she meant it as a joke, but I found it obsessive.

    The truth is I DO care and have cared for a long time. I just decided to be serious about it. I have a blog that no one IRL except my husband knows about and an FB page dedicated only to my hair. I honestly thought I was in the other page when I posted the picture.

    eye haelp mama kiep londry waerm.
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  9. #9

    Default Re: goal insecurity

    I haven't told anybody, but mainly because no one has asked. Most people I know think I'm weird enough without asking about my hair. The rest don't really care what I do with it. Several friends are long hairs though. 1 classic/mid-thigh-ish, 1 mid back (male), both my parents are upper back, hubby's approaching armpit.

    Most of the people that comment on how long it's getting are usually being supportive/observant rather then critical.

    Having said this, I find I really like my friends.

    Shannon

  10. #10
    Member Hotrox's Avatar
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    Default Re: goal insecurity

    I didn't tell anyone my goal, if they ask I just say that I am 'growing it'. Part of the reason is that I don't really know what my ultimate goal is and I'm also scared that if I make the goal real I might 'fail' and not make it. I just focus on the next milestones individually.

    But even if I new for sure, I wouldn't tell anyone, its personal and nobody else's business.

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