We have a similar hair type, and I can tell you that when my hair is freshly washed its hard for it to hold anything. Cones dont help this at all either. The way that I get around this is to wash at night and then set my hair on sponge rollers so I have some curl in the morning for more grab. The other thing is that when I sleep I braid it loosely from the crown and put it in a bun on top of my hair with clippies. This also gives me volume and braid waves for grab.
Otherwise if I do decide to shampoo and then go out I have to wear something that doesnt require any grab like a braided sort of style.
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