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Thread: Explanation of Contacts & Friends

  1. #21
    The Unimaginative One PatGear's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by talullah View Post
    ETA: Okay, I'm *really* bored, so I clicked on my own name and there was an "Add Talullah to your contacts" thing. So I clicked on it, and it asked me if I wanted to add Talullah to my contacts--NOT the same message I got when I tried to add you again! So I guess we're not friends with ourselves by default. :P
    So did you go through with it? If you also check the box to request friendship, will you get a request and everything? That's funny! What if you break up with yourself, will you still be able to see your own blog? Oh, the possibilities!

    See "About ME" under profile for my friend/contact policy
    Public Album Private Album

  2. #22
    The Heroine talullah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatGear View Post
    So did you go through with it? If you also check the box to request friendship, will you get a request and everything? That's funny! What if you break up with yourself, will you still be able to see your own blog? Oh, the possibilities!
    Sorry, I didn't see this until today!

    Well, I added myself to my contacts today, and clicked the "send friendship request" box-- it said "You can't be friends with yourself"!! LOL! I am so easily amused.
    The voices may not be real, but they have some pretty good ideas.
    Another Girl's Paradise

  3. #23
    Member DavidN's Avatar
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    Thank you for your excellent explanation, Dianyla! I thought the way to tell if your friendship request had been rejected was when the tickmark by "friend" was missing, and it no longer showed, "friendship requested"?

    However, I am now wondering if the example I noticed on my profile page where the tickmark by "friend" disappeared meant that that person had actually accepted my request earlier on, then broke it later? It is SO hard to keep track of everything! It would be good to know.

    Thank you in advnace, for clarification on this.

  4. #24
    The Unimaginative One PatGear's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DavidN View Post
    However, I am now wondering if the example I noticed on my profile page where the tickmark by "friend" disappeared meant that that person had actually accepted my request earlier on, then broke it later? It is SO hard to keep track of everything! It would be good to know.
    Yes, that's what it means. It doesn't necessarily mean that you're not still on their contact list, though.

    The only way to know whether you are a "contact" or not is if they have a private blog and you can't get in, then you know you aren't. If you can get in, then maybe you're a contact, or maybe the blog is public....you don't know unless they mention in their blog that it's private!

    As for photo albums. If it's private and you don't have access, you won't even see it listed at all so you wouldn't know whether or not you have access. That's another reason the whole "contact but not friend" thing is so confusing.


    tallulah, that's a hoot! "You can't be friends with yourself"

    See "About ME" under profile for my friend/contact policy
    Public Album Private Album

  5. #25
    Busy IRL Delila's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CountessDeJager View Post
    ...What I don't want is people being uncomfortable if they choose not to accept me as a contact or friend because we all have different ways we are using the friend lists. I'm just throwing it out there and there will be no hurt feelings on my side. I also want to write that people shouldn't be shy about asking me, I'm happy to share any private content (not that there is any yet) with LHC regulars.

    Elizabeth
    I agree. 'Friend' is such a loaded word, but in this context it doesn't mean quite as much as it would otherwise.

    I don't have a blog yet, but I think once we can access our old journals again (in whatever form that happens), I'll maybe use that old information as a reference point, just so people with a similar hairtype can read it, or not, as they choose.

    I've made the effort to reach out to others and 'befriend' them, mostly based on total number of posts, hairtype and generally positive interactions elsewhere on the forum.

    The memberlist is so huge that I think it would be hard to befriend everyone, so I do hope that people will feel comfortable enough just to ask for access should I ever make a blog with limited access.

  6. #26
    shapenote singer embee's Avatar
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    Well, I tried to respond to Elizabeth's Friend Request, but I can't see that anything changed, I still have it "pending" so I guess I dithered around too long or did something wrong. Bummer.

    But thanks anyway, Elizabeth. I appreciate the offer, even if I'm unable to make it happen.

    ETA: Whee! I finally got it! I did not see the little place to put the check mark in Elizabeth's pic, so I had not clicked it! It was a white box on a white background for me and was invisible! I only realized it was there when I got a second, different request, with a different piccy of course!
    Last edited by embee; March 15th, 2008 at 03:48 PM. Reason: update!

  7. #27
    Dangerous with scissors Accolady's Avatar
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    Oh, Dianyla, thank you!

    I thought I was going to have to send someone a pm asking
    if I could unfriend them as a test. LOL.

    Jeez, would that be an insult?

    Pardon me, but would you mind if I didn't have you as a friend
    for a few minutes? Just an experiment, you see.

    KM
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    It is more important to have self-respect than to gain respect from others.
    --Madeleine de Scudéry (1607-1701)

  8. #28
    Member DavidN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatGear View Post
    Yes, that's what it means. It doesn't necessarily mean that you're not still on their contact list, though.

    The only way to know whether you are a "contact" or not is if they have a private blog and you can't get in, then you know you aren't. If you can get in, then maybe you're a contact, or maybe the blog is public....you don't know unless they mention in their blog that it's private!

    As for photo albums. If it's private and you don't have access, you won't even see it listed at all so you wouldn't know whether or not you have access. That's another reason the whole "contact but not friend" thing is so confusing.


    tallulah, that's a hoot! "You can't be friends with yourself"
    Actually, PatGear, I was like you, and when I saw the box unticked, my first thought was that I might have accientally unticked it. Fortunately, I did not send a second friendship request out, once I had a better understanding of what the unticked box meant. Also, the person in question did remove me from her contacts, since I no longer have access to her blog.

    Also, my understanding is that if the "friendship requested" box is still ticked means that it is entirely possible your friendship request may not actually have been rejected yet, if the person has been offline. I know of several in mine that changed to "friend"when the person came back online, but there are still a number of others outstanding.

  9. #29
    Flawed Beauty Amoretti's Avatar
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    If someone sends you a friendship request and you put them down as a contact instead, will that person know?

  10. #30
    The Heroine talullah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amoretti View Post
    If someone sends you a friendship request and you put them down as a contact instead, will that person know?

    Well, they'll know you didn't accept the friend request when you don't show up on their friends list.

    They'll only know that you made them a contact instead if they realize that they can see your private blog/album, if you've made it private. And if they know you've made it private.
    The voices may not be real, but they have some pretty good ideas.
    Another Girl's Paradise

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