You handled the situation well! You are not old and frumpy, don't let her make you second guess yourself like that, she has raised you and now you are making your own decisions period. Your hair in your sig pic is quite beautiful by the way!
I haven't read through all the responses but have to say that I think you handled yourself very well to your mom!
I think maybe in the future, not tell her so much about your plans with your hair since she's not supportive and can be placed in the "need to know basis" group...?
Also, perhaps changing the subject whenever she tries to talk about hair...? IE: (mom): So...I saw someone with beautiful hair with lots of layers. (you): That's nice. So have you talked to (insert a friend or family member's name) lately?
And I agree with pp that perhaps this is also a way for your mom to feel like you're not growing up so fast or that you're still her "baby"...
Not that that would make her questioning or persistent need to "persuade" you less hurtful or bothersome...lol. Moms can be tough! I hope I can be supportive to my 2 girls (DD1 is 3 yrs, DD2 is 7 months) in all their decisions. Ok, most of them at least...
You handled the situation well! You are not old and frumpy, don't let her make you second guess yourself like that, she has raised you and now you are making your own decisions period. Your hair in your sig pic is quite beautiful by the way!
Proud Member of the Renegray Gang
Lady Arethusa of the Gossamer Garden in the Order of the Long-Haired Knights
joyfulmom4
My hair is neither as long as yours or as thick and gorgeous as yours, but I know what you mean about your mom. My mom just has to comment on when I'll cut it or when it will be long enough, just about every time I see her. I just smile and tell her I like it and that's all that matters. I don't let it bother me at all. I do go through the feeling frumpy/old thing occasionally, but I ignore it and it goes away Life is much too short to let other people's negative opinions matter to me, even from my mom. Too funny, I remember bugging her about her unfashionable makeup and polyester clothing back in the late '70s early '80s. Maybe it's payback time
Am I feelin' the smilies today or what?!? Whatever, I just want you to know that your hair is beautiful and if it makes you happy that's all that matters!
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I just stumbled in here and had to laugh.
My mother has incredibly thick, strong hair. Used to be BSL, but sometime in the late 70's she cut it short. It's been getting shorter and shorter as time goes by.
I used to get comments from mom about my hair being 'stringy' 'difficult' 'hippy-looking' 'unprofessional' etc. with advice on just how short it should be, pictures from magazines, salon cards, pointing out hairstyles she liked.
I fixed that once and for all some time ago. I told mom "Look, I love you, and you're my mom. I have never before said one word about your hair. You've sacrificed it all for convenience and I don't like the way it looks at all. Yet I've respectfully held my tongue because you never asked what I thought about it. If you aren't willing to grow your hair back to waist-length just because I think it would look nice, then why on earth would you think I should cut mine because you *think* you'd like it better short?"
She was a little hurt at first I think, but later that day she told me I was right and she was sorry about it. Just recently she actually tried growing it out and it was a little below her collar when she gave up again. I am amazed at how fast her hair grows and how incredibly strong and thick it is. More white than black now, but still incredible. I was hoping it would get long enough that I could show her how to french braid it, but it never got that far.
Oh well.
Don't let it get you down. My mom and I will never agree about it, but once I spelled it out she stopped being critical.
Hopefully you will eventually reach a point with your mother when you can agree to disagree.
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