New here

**Emila** · January 13th, 2023, 03:10 PM

Hi everyone,

I've got fairly long hair by average standards, it's about waist length. But it's been this length for a while and I am having trouble getting it to grow any longer.
I also have a lot of challenges with split ends, hair breakage, and hair tangling. I often feel like my ends are dry. I also just feel like I have no idea how to style my hair because it's slightly wavy and fairly frizzy and just never looks nice? So I'm here basically because I need some help to know how to better take care of my hair.

Also I recently saw this YouTube video that made me realise that I could change my hair practices to achieve more length. https://youtu.be/k-2YxqGiI54
I wonder if anyone else around here has seen that video?

I had a look at the hair type threads and I think I have 2a hair that's fine but with average to thick volume. (Everyone always tells me my hair is thick but I know I've lost a lot of volume especially in the front and top of my head).

So I think step one might be to address how I brush my hair. I think I'm a bit too aggressive with brushing. My hairbrush is always full of of hair. I always brush my hair when it's wet because of fear of tangles. I find that using leave in products after washing may help the wet detangling process but result in more tangles and knots later, so I usually avoid them. I haven't tried oil recently so I might give that a go too.

How do you go about your day with wet unbrushed hair while you wait for it to dry? My hair takes all day to dry so I feel like I have no choice but to brush it while it's wet because I have to style it and get on with my day.

My current routine is what I've done most my life - standard shampoo/condition twice a week. I shampoo my roots and condition my lengths. Leave the conditioner on for a few minutes if I can. Wrap hair in microfibre towel after showering. Then brush and let air dr y for a little while. Then style while still wet. (My hair would take most of the day to dry naturally). If I leave it out I usually end up a tangled frizzy mess with loads of knots. Lately I have started sleeping with it in a simple braid.

I'm interested in overhauling my routine but I also need it to be easy and effective. I'm thinking about getting a trim soon as it's been a couple of years and I'm sick of my split ends. I think I would be happy with waist length hair if I could get it thicker and healthier, less tangled, and actually enjoy my hair again. Though longer hair would be a bonus!

I'm excited to try some new styles with forks and sticks. My usual hairstyle is a simple bun fastened with a hair tie or scrunchie, or a large claw clip - though it's hard to get claw clips big enough to work on my hair!

Feel free to give me any tips for where I should start on this hair journey. It's all a bit overwhelming!

**lapushka** · January 13th, 2023, 04:47 PM

Welcome!

Just ease up on the brushing (for one) and sit back and read some threads instead. You'll get a lot of info just doing that.

**shelomit** · January 16th, 2023, 06:57 AM

Re: waiting on your hair to dry, have you tried washing it once you get home from work and letting it dry overnight? Some people are really annoyed by going to bed with wet hair, but personally I'd rather deal with that than have it wet all day.

Re: detangling methods, what does and doesn't work for people seems to be pretty personal. There's another member on here with my same hair type and length, and we do things exactly opposite from each other XD So my advice would be to systematically try different things, make note of how your hair reacts, and then make an informed decision. e.g., perhaps for one week try wet detangling with a brush, then the next week dry detangling with a brush, the next week wet detangling with a comb, etc.

**Emila** · January 16th, 2023, 09:38 PM

Thank you both for welcoming me!

I am learning heaps. I love it here hehe.

I've been sick with covid and this forum has kept me very interested and entertained.

Thanks. Ive started finger detangling and using a wide toothed comb to detangle. It's actually going better than I thought it would! I think I'm losing a lot less hair this way.

I think I just had this mental perception about brushing my hair with a hairbrush, it was like brushing my teeth, kind of non-negotiable and like I wouldn't be taking care of my hair properly if I didn't brush it every morning with a brush.

But I'm happy with how the wide tooth comb is going. I have to be mindful to only do a small section at a time and not rush!

I have also been putting a little oil on my hair ends. I have some rosehip oil that's meant for my face but I don't like it on my face. So I'm using that on my hair instead! I think it's working well so far but I'll probably replace it with a different kind of oil once my little bottle is empty. It would be expensive to use exclusively rosehip oil in my hair lol.

I'm also experimenting with my way routine and my sleep hair routine a little. I tried washing at night - I waited 2.5 hours after washing before going to bed, it was still damp! But it wasn't too bad. I am one of those people who can't stand sleeping on wet or even damp hair. But it was dry enough, and I was tired enough, for it to be tolerable this time. I think next time I'd prefer a bit more time between washing and sleeping though.

I have found my satin pillow case - I really don't like sleeping on it but I've been using it as a bonnet instead, sort of. Lol. And that is kind of working for frizz.

I think I'm quite particular about sensory things while I'm sleeping so this is a challenge for me.

I'm not entirely happy with my hair overall but I am happy with less dryness in my ends thanks to using oil. I think my hair texture is a bit awkward. It's 2a, or possibly 2b or C after my wash and air dry. But mostly it looks messy and stringy and basically my ideal is for it to look like a rippled silk curtain. 🙏

Now, I'm trying to decide if I should try some different types of shampoos and such. But also want to use up my current sulfate and cone laden bottles. Previous experiences with no-poo and the curly girl method have given me some reservations about going sulfate and come free, but I'm really interested in natural approaches so I'm interested to give it another try.
And I'm considering trying a hair-tie free approach!

I might have placed a couple of orders yesterday - one to buy some oils and aloe vera things, one to put a few hair sticks and forks 🙈 I'm also loving hair tutorials on YouTube. I can't stop watching haha.