Don't like how I look with my hair up

[Gaalsong]

Hi everybody,
I have not been on here in a while. I have been busy with family life, etc. Anyway, my hair is now about hip length. I keep it up all the time unless going on a date with my husband. My original goal was to see how long it would get, what my terminal was, then probably maintain it around classic length. My problem is that I don't like how I look with my hair up. I have a kind of intense face, not very soft, and having my hair up just makes it worse. On top of that, I usually wear skirts instead of pants so I feel like I'm in period costume or something. I try to do different updos, leave wispies out, wear dangly earrings or headbands, but the truth is I just look better with my hair down. I also have kids, so having hip length hair down is not very practical. I am seriously thinking about cutting to waist length and trying to leave it down most of the time. Anybody else struggling with this? Does anybody leave their hair down all the time? Suggestions?

[Aerya]

I totally feel you on the skirts + bun combo, lol. I feel like I either look really religious or like I'm larping. I don't like how I look with my hair pulled straight back either, but I find doing braid accents (I like lace braids around your hair on each side of the part, I find that softens my square/round face too!) helps with that.

Getting some layers to have loose might help too. You could do wispy or more chunky if you want the "hair down" look. Length is up to you, I know most people recommend shorter ones, chin length and up, but I like the look of longer ones too. I'll sometimes just leave the front pieces of my hair down and even though they're collarbone length and long enough to pull back, I don't think it looks out of place as long as the rest of the hair isn't super sleek.

That being said, if you want to cut back to waist and just wear it down, do it! At the end of the day what matters is that you're happy with your hair. I would take some time to mull it over though, and perhaps try with some layers first - I know for me I often want to wear my hair down but when I do, it quickly gets too annoying. And my hair is just APL!

[Deborah]

I just looked at your wedding practice hairstyle photos. Your face looks very soft and pretty to me. I think that you probably look much better in an updo than you think.

Of course, you can wear your hair down whenever you want as well. Waist length is nice for wearing it up or down comfortably, more so than tailbone. Do what makes you happy!

[lapushka]

I try to do different updos, leave wispies out, wear dangly earrings or headbands, but the truth is I just look better with my hair down. I also have kids, so having hip length hair down is not very practical. I am seriously thinking about cutting to waist length and trying to leave it down most of the time. Anybody else struggling with this? Does anybody leave their hair down all the time? Suggestions?

Maybe cut back one milestone, and see if you like that length better. That would put you at waist. Maybe your current situation (with kids) won't allow you to wear your hair too long, and it then just is what it is. Your life is more important than the length of your hair, IMMHO.

But I felt like that when I started to wear my hair up. If you do it more, you sort of get used to it - I did. Maybe it's more a getting used to period you need?

But if you are really determined, I'd cut back to waist, yes.

[GrowlingCupcake]

I've been wearing my hair up pretty constantly since about APL. I still dislike how I look with my hair up. I haven't really found anything that works, either.

Hip to waist is not such a big difference for most people, so I would cut back if you are not feeling it at the moment; you can always grow it out again.

[milosmomma]

I think you should do what makes you happy. That said I also think you should try more things before doing a big chop. What about half ups? You'll have the look of wearing it down but it wont be in your face as much. What about a fringe of some sort? I agree with aerya that longer layers or face framers can look just as nice as the more often seen sideswept or straight across eyebrow length fringe. Also agree with the accent braids, I'm not very good at them yet but I really like the look of it. I have some pretty thin see through patches at my temples and try to hide them but dont want to commit to a fringe. For me personally I find that not pulling the top of my hair straight back is more aesthetic. I will keep my part and kind of have my hair go down before back in a sweeping motion if that makes sense. Hope you find something that works, keep us posted

[Groovy Granny]

I find WL is worn down more easily: I have also done it at Hip and TBL.
Because it is wispy like cobwebs it must be in a half up or ponytail lol,but I enjoy that too.
I get headaches a lot and my scalp is sensitive so I do lower buns @ my nape; it is bunned mostly in hot weather.

You seen to have some texture so tendrils would be nice and maybe wispy bangs.

I brush my hair back and have no bangs so it can be harsh, so I do tendrils when I can and try to keep my hair a bit poofy on the top and softer at the sides.

My hair feels great down but must be contained because of the wispiness, and there are days when even a half up won't do because of wind etc; many days I do ponytail with various ties, barrettes, and scrunchies.

And I eventually got to be less judgemental when I saw my reflection; I prefer my hair brushed back and don't like it flying around my face.
Many times it is just the voice in my head shouting what I THINK others are judging about my hair .....so :

Whatever brings YOU joy i styling your hair ....do it.... don't overthink it when it is up or down.

[Ligeia Noire]

Ah ah that's all I wear, skirts and dresses and my hair in buns... but to me looking like from bygone eras is a compliment. I actually prefer myself with hair up than down, by a mile but i can understand most people don't. I second accent braids or if you are set on it, just do what pleases you best. Cut back and wear it down. I still wore my hair up all the time even at waist but some people can pull it off even at tbl so...

[-Fern]

My hair is so thick that it drives me nuts if I'm working on anything with it down, so I'd wear it up just for sheer convenience no matter how it looks on me... That being said, there are definitely things you can do to soften the look, like a pouf or twist in the front/on the sides, or a framing braid/twist.

But if having your hair down doesn't inconvenience you, wear it down!

[dove4]

I don't expect to look good all the time, so it doesn't bother me too much if I don't. I see it as a practical thing.

My rain coat looks frumpy, but it's better than getting wet. I could buy a glamorous rain coat, but is it worth the time and money? To me, it's not.

I see my buns as practical, like a rain coat. They may not look great, but they are useful.

Also, it's not so much as looking bad, as looking different. I think some people only feel like one certain look looks good on them. I think variety is nice! If you have your favorite look every day, and it's the same look, won't it get monotonous?