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Thread: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

  1. #31981
    Member enting's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    Quote Originally Posted by blackgothicdoll View Post
    I couldn't let this thought go.

    I was shopping at Target today and there were a pair of men talking going back and forth between the hair ailes one black and one white. I passed the black man while looking at GF products, then turned into the ethnic hair products were the two men ended up convening. One of them was looking for something specific, they stopped in the corner of the same aisle. The white man started talking:

    "My wife and I are planning to adopt, we both agree we don't care what race it is. But then she says, anything but black" - he whispers this word but I still heard, I was at the other end of the aisle so I doubt he thought I was listening. "I asked her why and she said, 'I don't know how to do their hair!' I asked her 'really, that's the only reason'?" His friend just chuckled, a kind of unreadable sound, and muttered something along the lines of 'it's difficult' or something pretty vague. They both walked away and I felt so sad. Who is to say a little girl/boy doesn't deserve a home because their hair is different?

    I thought about my manager, who had fostered multiple black girls, adopted two, and learned how to do their hair. He even mentioned that some of their products needed to be refrigerated, which told me his wife had looked into natural remedies and healthy hair care. I'm glad I know him, and know there are two types of people, or I would have truly lost hope in all mankind. But it still upset me. That's ridiculous.
    That makes me sad, too. I'm glad you know other people to set against that conversation.
    And on the flip side, I have a friend with dense 3b/3c curls who has no idea of how to deal with her kid's 1b not-so-thick hair and asks me for advice. It's all about willingness to learn.
    Besides, maybe the man would be willing to learn to do their hair if she's not!

  2. #31982
    Secretly a Bald Dude AmaryllisRed's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    Yeah, that's ridiculous. It's super easy to Google and find loads of sources on how to deal with hair different from your own.
    My daughter has curly hair and I have no issues managing it because of that glorious thing called YouTube.
    Finally made a signature!
    My not-usually-hair-related blog is at www.thecoffeelessmom.wordpress.com

  3. #31983
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    Before the ubiquitous internet, I learned how to style my adopted kids' 3 and 4 hair by trial and error. It's not rocket science.

  4. #31984
    Member guska's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    Sometimes I get the urge to cut my hair to a shorter length. Then I think about the time it would take to grow it again and it's just not worth it
    https://forums.longhaircommunity.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=32426&d=1529747049
    In a constant battle with my hair Dealing with hair loss
    Neck --- SL --- CBL --- APL ---BSL --- ???

  5. #31985
    ^ YLVA, not YIVA! Ylva's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    Quote Originally Posted by guska View Post
    Sometimes I get the urge to cut my hair to a shorter length. Then I think about the time it would take to grow it again and it's just not worth it
    Same, same. But at the same time, cutting short is just a silly, absurd thought, since it's been ages since my hair was any level of short. So I don't really see it as any kind of a viable plan.
    Ósnjallr maðr hyggsk munu ey lifa, ef hann við víg varask;
    en elli gefr hánum engi frið, þótt hánum geirar gefi.


  6. #31986
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    I don't think I'd ever want to cut shorter than waist again, but I am wondering if I should cut back to BCL or so. My hair is beginning to get heavy.

  7. #31987

    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    It's funny but the more whites I get the more I want to grow my hair longer! I can see that the whites have much more wave and curl than my dark hairs and I'm excited to see what the overall type will be when it's mostly white. I have a feeling it'll hold styles better as well since my darker hairs are fairly slippery. I know this bucks the general trend of women having shorter haircuts when they're older but we here get the beauty of long hair at all ages.

  8. #31988
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    This new shampoo is working well thus far. The mop approves. I can only hope that the 2 other trials will go this well.
    Shooting for fingertip curly by xmas 19

  9. #31989
    Member summergame's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    Why does my hair fall out so much when I do CO washes? It's not normal that huge amount of hair that I have lost yesterday. Almost 2 hands full of hair...

  10. #31990
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    Default Re: The Random Hair Thoughts Megathread

    If it helps at all, that sounds like a (bad) joke to me. It's quite possible the wife wasn't at all serious. When my husband and I were thinking about adoption, our only serious consideration was moving to a more integrated neighborhood if we adopted a black child. Moving was a big deal, but we would have done it. All of my black friends had been work friends, and I had retired young. Our next door neighbors were black, but they were a distinct minority in the neighborhood.

    On the other hand, my husband's Mom was born in 1913, and had maintained nearly all the beliefs she was raised with. She had very odd opinions about black people. We knew it would freak out his mother, and said that might not be such a bad idea! If it would prevent her constantly telling us how to raise our child it would be very good! In reality, we knew that she would love a black grandchild like any other, but it would feel very wrong to her at first. Constantly telling us how to raise our child would happen regardless. DH and I have always joked about everything, and our jokes probably seem irreverent or in poor taste to many other people. Good thing we usually keep them to ourselves! At any rate, had you overheard some of our comments, they might have been offensive but I don't think our overall attitude would have been.

    Quote Originally Posted by blackgothicdoll View Post
    I couldn't let this thought go.

    "My wife and I are planning to adopt, we both agree we don't care what race it is. But then she says, anything but black" - he whispers this word but I still heard, I was at the other end of the aisle so I doubt he thought I was listening. "I asked her why and she said, 'I don't know how to do their hair!' I asked her 'really, that's the only reason'?"

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