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Thread: I'm not your friend anymore?

  1. #11

    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    I've had it happen once too - either it was a mistake (hitting the wrong buttons), people are trimming their friends lists, or any number of reasons. I prefer to not take it personal, others can organize their profiles as they wish. I just deleted the unchecked friends from my list (and hopefully didn't delete anyone by accident!)


  2. #12
    Dangerous with scissors Accolady's Avatar
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    Arrow Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    Well, I brushed my teeth, check the underarms, even ran
    the Hoover. But alas, nothing to worry about.

    Certainly there are a multitude of wonderful folks on the site
    I consider friends, in fact, everyone until you touch my chocolate
    chip cookie dough. Then we have a problem.

    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    It is more important to have self-respect than to gain respect from others.
    --Madeleine de Scudéry (1607-1701)

  3. #13
    Busy IRL Delila's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    I seem to recall that some people have trimmed their friends lists because their blogs are perhaps becoming more personal than they'd want to share with the forum members at random.

    Back when we made the switch, I remember being a tad put off when some people I'd considered definite LHC acquaintances didn't consider me 'friend' enough to let me read their blogs even though I'd been reading their journals on the old boards quite literally for years. Seems a tad standoffish and silly to me, since the old 'private' boards were open to pretty much everyone, even me, but to each their own.

    I think also that sometimes people get a bit freaked when they get reminded somehow that the internet is NOT a private place, no matter what seeming limitations are placed on memberships and access. I've noticed a good many members deleting their blogs entirely (more than once), and can't help wondering what's up. (I tend not to know for sure, because sometimes we're not 'friends', LOL!)

  4. #14
    Member akurah's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    My best guess would be predominantly user error, especially in cases where you're clueless as to why they unfriended you. That and/or server glitch.

    I may have un-friended people accidentally before, I honestly don't know, but it wouldn't surprise me. The system is somewhat awkward. That and I'm obnoxious, so it's also possible the "un-friending" came from their side. No skin off my back as far as I'm concerned, as I can understand the desire for privacy even when it comes to people you may like. I like all my coworkers, for instance, but there's plenty I don't tell them, and the blog filtering/permissions is tied to the friends system, so.
    Lady Nemetona of the Blessed Circle in the Order of the Long Haired Knights

  5. #15
    Account Closed by Member Request
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    FWIW, the privacy setings are not tied to the friends system. You can have friends, and you can have contacts, and both can read your blog if it is set to private.

    I decided to "unfriend" some people recently and also explained my reasons in my blog. I added those people to my contact list instead,so they should still be able to read my blog, should they wish to do so.

  6. #16
    Busy IRL Delila's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    Oh, and for what it's worth, some people told me that they didn't want me as a friend via PM, so it's not as though I got unfriended accidentally (or simply not made a contact, or whatever).

    I totally get that the internet's sometimes a creepy place, with skeevy people in it doing peculiar things, so to anyone out there contemplating making changes in their privacy settings, trimming their friends list, or whatever it is you feel is necessary, just try to remember that some of the folks you don't 'know' at all, actually do care and hope the best for you, even if they never spend a lot of time chatting, PM'ing or posting comments in your blog.

    I've learned a lot from the members of this forum, and am still quite grateful to others for having discussed their haircare travails in useful ways, but I do have to say that I find some of this un-friending / blog deletion stuff a bit odd, particularly when it happens over and over.

    If you're an intensely private person in real life, act that way online too, it's likely to save others a good bit of confusion.

    Edited to add: If you act as though you were a carefree extrovert, people tend to assume that's what you are, even if it's not true.
    Last edited by Delila; November 20th, 2008 at 08:16 PM.

  7. #17
    OldTimer Older than LHC Teacherbear's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    I think we're still "friends" (as far as the software is concerned and as far as I can tell). I *know* we are still friends, though! Will you share your cookie dough if I share my brownie batter? I'll even bring a gallon of iced cold milk!
    Hmm, what should this say? I'm thinking . . .

  8. #18
    Dangerous with scissors Accolady's Avatar
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    Arrow Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    Aw, Teach, we are friends no matter what the system has to say.

    You can have my cookie dough, my last pair of clean socks AND
    I'd even share my late night bowl of cereal with you!

    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    It is more important to have self-respect than to gain respect from others.
    --Madeleine de Scudéry (1607-1701)

  9. #19
    ~BleachedGuru~ justgreen's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    LHC glitch. I've had several friends that had to ask again, one of them being Pegs! It was like, Dude! We were already friends, what happened?

    If you'll share that chocolate, I've got a bottle of chilled Rosa Regale....it goes VERY well with chocolate.....
    Callie sez *meep*
    justgreen judiciously journals
    Lady Emeralde Justyce in the Order of the Long Hair Knights

  10. #20
    Queen of Purls Carolyn's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm not your friend anymore?

    KM, I checked and we are still officially "friended" here.


    I am not here to decorate your world

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