Don't put conditioner on your hair before you swim because it's bad for the pool. I would suggest a French braid (gets more hair in it), and get a silicone swim cap. Then you can try soaking your hair in conditioner to detangle it after you swim.
I find that teasing the tangles out from the ends with a wide toothed comb under cold running water works fine for me, but I have very straight hair. Also, standing under cold running water for as long as it takes to detangle my hair gently is not fun.
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