My hair... makes me sad.

[Rebeccalaurenxx]

I have lurked this site for awhile but I finally decided to post.
And this is probably going to be very long, but i have a lot on my mind and a lot i need help with >.>
Okay, so since about the age of.. well, since i was born, i have ALWAYS had trouble growing my hair out.

Now at the age of 18, and still sporting that "just touching collar bone" look, that i have had since the age of 12, it was really starting to bother me. So I came to this site in hopes that someone could help me.
I dont know why my hair is this way but it gets to my collar bone, then just BREAKS.
There are those nice little, broken ends, you know what i mean? Those random L shaped ends. No matter how many i trim, they come back!

Now, i know what you are going to say "Damage?"
Well, yes, that could be possible, considering, well look at my hair, its blue. Obviously i color, and use harsh treatment on it. But I do get frequent trims, and my hair does grow! I bleached my hair in december of last year, cut off about 2 inches and my hair was fine and dandy, then it grew to my collar bone and just started breaking. It gets finer at that area and just pretty much either breaks or stops growing.

I look at photos of myself as an 8 year old with a pixie, and my younger sister with hair much longer than i and just get sad.
Is there any one out there that can give me some sort of,... positive word? Or someone that has been through the same that can give me some sort of hope?
Im really hoping that my collar bone is not my terminal length, that maybe im just a REALLY slow grower.

Ive even considered monistat, as i have been looking at that thread for days and it looks more and more appealing every second.

My hair routine is;
Shampoo with - Bedhead moisture maniac
Condition with - Nexxus humectress
I let my hair air dry, then use a light leave in conditioner because my hair is dry and wavy, but fine.

Thanks to anyone out there that can give me ANY sort of advice.
Right now; Ive given up coloring, straightening, and washing my hair daily.

[katienoonan]

I think giving up the colouring, straightening and heat-drying is a good start, the first year is going to be really hard though, it might be worth your while dying all of your hair one colour one last time (with something nice, like henna!) and then letting it be..

As for the breaking off at collar bone, you may want to start trying out updo's! There are buckets and buckets of threaqds on here detailing and explaining different styles of protective updos... a lot of people get breakage, wearing your hair in pigtails or buns is one way of sweeping it right outta the danger zone!

As for your hairlength when young.. all you have to go on it photographs of you and your sister.. I imagine your hair may have been cut as frequently as mine at that age - every 6weeks! If your sister always had length then all that would be trimmed off is the growth she had, and the same goes for you! Thus 'stalling' any growth you may have had!

There are plenty of members here who thought their terminal length was shoulder and who now have hip length flowy hair.. Don't fret, you're in the right place!

[Theobroma]

I second what katienoonan said. Giving up the damaging treatments is an excellent start, and now what you mainly need is patience and perseverance. If your ends are damaged enough that they're breaking at collar bone length just from friction against your body/clothing, definitely do try to wear it up more! You should be able to do a peacock twist at your length, which will at least keep your ends out of harm's way.

I also suggest you read Nightshade's article on rehabilitating damaged hair, both for the good advice it contains and for the reassurance that, yes, it can be done. Good luck!

[Curly Hermione]

Don't worry, you've come to the right people! There are so many lovely ladies (and men!) here with gorgeous hair that give great advice. Your hair can and will get where you want it to, given the right care. I'll reitirate what katienoonan said, henna could be a good way to go for you. Or maybe even henndigo, but make sure you research it thoroughly beforehand. I'm certainly no expert, but there are loads of people here who are. Good luck and don't despair!

[starlamelissa]

Keep your blue, just change how ya do it. In stead of bleaching first, apply it straight to your hair, diluted with conditioner. Try to wear your hair up in a claw clip or soft ponytail holder. Maybe invest in a satin pillowcase. Hope that helps!!!

[UltraBella]

I think you would look AMAZING with bright flaming red henna hair !!!

My professional suggestion would be to ditch the BedHead Moisture Maniac and the Nexxus Humectress. The ingredients in the shampoo are very harsh and very drying. SD Alcohol 40 ! My hair would run away screaming. Plus the conditioner is so full of cones, it's cone OVERLOAD. Combine the two and you could have a problem.

This "moisture" shampoo can roughen your cuticle and dry your hair out, then you coat it in so many cones that the nice ingredients, like oils, can't even begin to help your hair. Ends breaking off - could be product related.
If you like cones, you can keep using them, but I would suggest a conditioner not quite so overloaded with them. I would experiment with a few cheaper conditioners and try no-cone too. I personally love Garnier Triple Nutrition. I use a bit if it distributed through my soaking wet hair as a leave in.
A low sulfate shampoo will still remove buildup but not be as harsh. Tresemme makes a low sulfate one I really like.

I wish you much success in your hair journey !

[RedDevil]

we have very similar hair, except mine is a bit curlier than yours but very FINE! With my old routine of blow outs, then flat iron finishes my hair was breaking left and right but I didnt realize it. I just figured because I didn't have much hair that it also meant it doesnt grow very long either.Well I'm almost at BSL now. And since I let it do whatever it wants it looks much thicker.
so give up the heat (its hard I know)
wear your hair up
eat some vitamins
you will get there

[archel]

Oh man Moisture Maniac shampoo KILLED my hair, then I realized it had alcohol AND sodium lauryl sulfate! I had to give that stuff away, it was so bad.

I'm with the other folks - stop with any heat or bleach and start treating it with oils and kid gloves and wearing it up whenever you can - you will be amazed at the difference if you just have patience

Welcome!

[moon2dove]

I am SO glad I joined TLHC I am also at my wits end with my hair It's fine curly, frizzy and thin and stuck at the same length - (Think this was due to illness) From behind it looks awful. I haven't had a hair cut for a year and have just started an oil, no shampoo just conditioner wash, after reading through here. I really want this to work. I am also putting my hair up, which I have never, ever done in the past. I really do not want to get it cut out of desperation

[spidermom]

I think you will have to choose between bleaching and long hair. Not everybody's hair can stand up to bleaching. Mine can't.

I would suggest using a cone free shampoo and conditioner (I'm using Shikai products right now), then a coney serum (I like CHI Silk Infusion). That way, you can control exactly how much cones go onto your hair. You could also try going cone free. Some people find that their hair doesn't break off as much without cones.

(P.S.: A coney product is anything that ends in "cone", like dimethicone, etc)