Newbie needing lots of guidance

Hello All pleased to be here.

I'm looking for advice - I apologise in advance for the ramblings!

I've been half heartedly trying to do 3 things at once without any real forethought or planning.

1. My first decision was to reduce the amount of hair washing and to stop using chemicals - I've been fairly successful and now generally only wash my hair once a month using a shampoo bar, apple cider vinegar and faith in nature conditioner. However, I've not really known what to do in between washes to maintain good healthy hair. I started this journey in early 2019, I think it took about 2 years to get to the once a month stage and now I have moved to a soft water area, it's even easier!

2. As I decided to reduce chemicals, I decided dying my hair once every 6 weeks wasn't something I should continue doing. I started to go grey in my late teens and have dyed it ever since (now nearly 50). Seeing that the number of greys at my roots and temples was rather significant I thought it would be a good time to go Grey. On consultation with my hairdresser we decided to do the bleaching method rather than grow it out (I was impatient and wish I could go back and tell myself to grow it out instead.) I think I managed 2 bleachings, a couple of months apart, then I noticed that the darks of my hair were showing at the roots and what I didn't want to do was have to keep bleaching my roots. I probably needed 2 more bleachings to get to a white/grey. Also lockdown happened and we couldn't get to a hairdresser anyway, so it started to grow out. In my infinite wisdom when I relocated at the beginning of this year I decided to darken my hair again and put in an auburn highlight. As it turned out the dark colour disappeared after a few weeks (?) however the auburn highlights have stubbornly remained, albeit fading to a strawberry blonde. I have a lot (90%) quite white silvery hair at my temples which I like. The back of my hair underneath is really quite brown and the rest is a mixture of the two and I think gives a washed out and I don't care about my hair attitude.

3. After not being able to get to the hairdresser and then later not wanting to go, my hair started to grow, I thought I would quite like to grow it long. I have worn it shoulder length for most of my life and it is now between APL and top of my bra line. When I had longer hair as a youngster it never grew any longer then where it is now, but I never made any conscious effort to grow it longer either. So I don't know if this is as long as I can grow my hair or if with some TLC I will be able to grow it, although at some point I am assuming I will want to cut off the blonde part.

My best guess for my hair type is in the 2 range I think b, medium and then ii for thickness edging towards iii. I've read your hair typing article but have literally just washed my hair so will have to wait for another month!

I'm a gardener so spend a lot of time outdoors and my hair is exposed to the elements, which here in the southwest of England is usually wet and windy! Therefore, coupled with the bleachings I think my hair is quite dry and damaged - I do not use any hair treatments and I always air dry.

I guess what I am looking for is advice on the best way to go grey should I cut it off and go from there? What to do with my hair in between washes to help it be healthy? Easy hair styles to do that will enhance the good grey and protect my hair, bearing in mind I'm a lazy person when it comes to beauty and I hate any form of preening. I usually have it in a simple braid.

As a quick by the by the last 2 washes I have oiled my hair before washing with a coconut oil based product. After reading the long hair care basics, you state the coconut oil makes your hair feel crunchy and that made me realise that is how my hair feels. Since the last wash it is constantly going into rat tail like clumps even after brushing, could this also be due to the coconut oil as well or maybe not rinsed all the conditioner out?

Any advice welcome form someone with lots of questions and bizarrely excited!:cheese:

"In my infinite wisdom," LOL ( ; I'm not greying so I have no advice there, only to say that white at the temples is a fetching look.

Re: "in between washes," is there some particular change that you notice in your hair/its "behavior" between washes? Longer hair and especially wavy/curly hair tends to want moisture, but if you're not noticing any ill effect from simply leaving it alone, well--if it ain't broke, etc. etc.!

I'd definitely recommend covering up your hair when working outside in rough weather. I used to do ranch work and vividly remember the aggravation of getting my braid caught on things, not to mention going back indoors with cold/wet hair : P A very quick solution, if your scalp will tolerate it, is to secure your hair up at the top of your head (topknot, top pony, whatever you prefer) and pop on a stocking cap. A bandana does the same job nicely in warmer weather.

Clumping in general is prototypical of wavy hair, but if the "rat tails" are a new development since these last two washes and not what you'd typically experience, they suggest your hair is being weighed down by something. It's unclear to me from what you've written if the "coconut oil based product" is the conditioner you're using, or something else. You could certainly try a more thorough rinse next time and see if that changes anything. I always have trouble rinsing out my hair all the way, and find that combing/brushing it as I rinse helps get right down to the scalp.

Welcome! :)

Welcome! :)

In between washes I use NightBloomings detangling spray or an aloe vera gel followed up by an oil.

I second putting your hair up and covering it. That's what I do with mine.

Coconut oil works differentfor different people. It could be that you didn't get it out properly or that coconut oil isn't right for you.

Welcome! :)

Hello and welcome to the fold.

Thank you everyone! I've just gone back to my basic washing and we will see how I get on and then will add other options in one at a time. My hair does feel straw like in between washes, especially the bottom 2 inches. So wonder if I need a deep conditioning treatment.