The "No End Goal" Thread: Enjoying the Journey

I guess this thread would apply to me. I have no idea what my goal is because I don't know how good my hair will look longer as far as quality, or what I will be able to put up with.

1. What was your starting point, and how long ago was it?

My starting point was a pixie back in 2002

2. What made you decide to grow your hair?

I don't actually remember anymore. I had happily had short hair for most of my late teens and twenties when I got a hankering for long hair again right before I had my first child. I have been growing it actively, but then cutting and growing ever since.

3. Do you enjoy the process of growing your hair out?

I must! Since I decided to grow it out more than 20 years ago, I have cut it many times. I usually get to a certain length( about MBL) and then cut it back to chin or jaw. I enjoy it for about a month, and then start growing again.

4. If you had to make a wild guess, where do you think you'll find your hair's "sweet spot"? Have you had that length in the past?

No clue where my sweet spot is. For hair quality and thickness, while looking good on my face while down, that would be APL. I notice when I reach that length I start really enjoying wearing my hair down. But, I want to find a longer sweet spot if possible.

5. Are you more interested in gaining length, or gaining thickness? Or are you just "meh" about your hair?

I am not going to gain thickness, my hair is thin. So, I'm more interested in length at this point. Until I get interested in thickness, which is usually when I cut it.

6. Do you trim your hair?

Yes! Sometimes I go for half a year or a year without a trim, but I do trim it.

7. Has your routine changed since you've been on LHC?

Pretty much do sulfate free shampoo, sometimes do Co wash, wash my hair much less. About once or twice a week.

8. Do you consider your hair to be a big part of who you are?

This is a great question. I think I do. Depending on what my hair is doing, I do feel differently about myself.

9. Does taking care of your hair make you happy, or is it more of a chore?

This has fluctuated through the years but right now, it's a chore. There have been times when I have really enjoyed having hair long enough to pamper, and maybe that will happen again but for now its pretty much benign neglect.

10. Do you think you are more likely to eventually land on one length, or try several different ones and change it up?

I definitely change up my lengths. I have tried everything from jaw length in the past 20 years, so I'm interested to try lengths beyond MBL.

Thanks for these thought-provoking questions! It has been interesting reading everyone's answers as well.

Great thread! It's so nice seeing people's responses :) Here are mine below:

1. What was your starting point, and how long ago was it?

Waist length, back in 2019. I did have long-ish hair most of my life though - I cut from hip to CBL when I was 12, then again to chin at 14 and 16, then pretty much kept it some version of 'long' after that. Now I'm starting from waist(ish) again after cutting back from classic in late 2021 and maintaining since then.

2. What made you decide to grow your hair?

Game of Thrones. I got really into braiding around the time I discovered the show in 2013, and I decided waist length or longer was the best length for the styles I liked.

3. Do you enjoy the process of growing your hair out?

Sometimes. Usually I get impatient when I think of it as 'growing it out', because I feel like I'm not 'there' yet. But if I focus on other things, or just try and have fun with my hair at whatever length it is, I enjoy myself :)

4. If you had to make a wild guess, where do you think you'll find your hair's "sweet spot"? Have you had that length in the past?

Probably around classic. I've been there before, and I love the look of that length. I would like to get to knee this time around, but I'm also happy to maintain or cut back if I don't enjoy my hair at that length, which was the whole reason behind my big chop in late 2021.

5. Are you more interested in gaining length, or gaining thickness? Or are you just "meh" about your hair?

Both I suppose? I would like long hair that doesn't thin out anymore than it already does, but length matters more than thickness because it's something I seem to have more control over.

6. Do you trim your hair?

Hahaha yes and no. I've gone up to 4 years between trims, but if I'm really keen on a specific hemline or hating my ends, I have no qualms about grabbing the scissors.

7. Has your routine changed since you've been on LHC?

Yes. In some ways for the better (I use a silk cap at night now), but in some ways seeing all these gorgeous heads of hair and hearing about a thousand different routines took me off the tried and true path of 'if it ain't broke'. My routine has been the same since 2013, it works, and any time I try something different I tend to get worse results. I'm cowashing all the way to the grave!

8. Do you consider your hair to be a big part of who you are?

Sort of? I definitely LIKE my hair, but more in a vanity way than because it feels like an innate part of me. I think if I lost it I would miss it, but again, mostly because of vanity and other people's perceptions of a 20something woman without hair than because I IDENTIFY with the hair itself. It's just hair. I would miss the hobby aspect of it though - styling, learning new ways to braids, participating in this community.

9. Does taking care of your hair make you happy, or is it more of a chore?

Varies. If I become hyperfocused on a particular hair 'goal', I become frustrated. If I focus on enjoying my hair, whether that means a LWB every day, or spending 2 hours on a special braided style, I'm happy.

10. Do you think you are more likely to eventually land on one length, or try several different ones and change it up?

Who knows! Right now, I'm a longhair at heart. I've always felt best when my hair was WL or longer. But life happens, priorities change (as does personal taste), so I really don't know what my hair will look like in the future!

I was looking at my hair in the mirror today and thought, "nope, not long enough". Does anyone else get that feeling?

Yes KokoroDragon! Granted, I'm "only" at hip. But my hair does not look long to me. So weird. Waist was my longtime unachievable goal, but it's not long enough.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KokoroDragon

I was looking at my hair in the mirror today and thought, "nope, not long enough". Does anyone else get that feeling?

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Every day :lol: especially with the shrinkage from my wurls! I really have no idea when I'll stop thinking that or if the LHC-itis is hitting me again :p who knows, because I certainly don't lol

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Originally Posted by giraff

Yes KokoroDragon! Granted, I'm "only" at hip. But my hair does not look long to me. So weird. Waist was my longtime unachievable goal, but it's not long enough.

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I know exactly what you mean! If I were to see my length hair on someone else, I'd think it was long. But on me, it just doesn't feel long yet.

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Originally Posted by vampyyri

Every day :lol: especially with the shrinkage from my wurls! I really have no idea when I'll stop thinking that or if the LHC-itis is hitting me again :p who knows, because I certainly don't lol

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LHC-itis hits hard sometimes. When I first joined I thought TBL was long. Now that I'm past it, it feels so short! :p

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Originally Posted by giraff

Yes KokoroDragon! Granted, I'm "only" at hip. But my hair does not look long to me. So weird. Waist was my longtime unachievable goal, but it's not long enough.

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I had "waist is actually not long enough" happen before I even managed to get there!! The LHCitis really out there. After I decided waist wasn't long enough I decided to go for classic but now I'm here I feel like my hair is "actually" long and I need more length to get "really long."

I'm between mid-thigh and knee and it still doesn't feel long to me - but it sure feels and acts inconvenient and annoying! That's one big reason why I've decided to cut it. It's literally pointless to keep the damaged length right now if it doesn't bring anything positive with it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KokoroDragon

I know exactly what you mean! If I were to see my length hair on someone else, I'd think it was long. But on me, it just doesn't feel long yet…

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When I look at other people’s hair, I sometimes find myself thinking “ok, they’ve got nice long hair! …wait, that looks like BSL? I’m at BSL, how come is my hair not long???” :lol:

I always felt "not that long/too short" till my recent chop. Now I find myself more confident saying I have long hair. Weird, isn't it?