I have a very bad habit. Help me kick it?

[frostbitebuck]

Hey guys! So I have one habit that I know is really bad for my hair, but I feel like I HAVE to do it for my hair to look good most days. In my previous thread I mentioned my use of hair gel to keep it managed, and as suggested I stopped that. But now I'm doing something worse.

I have a friend who has hair very similar to mine, which I find odd because she's not african american at all. I have very thick, almost bra strap length, curly, black hair and she has very thick, long, curly, red hair. But her hair is always perfectly weighed down and it always has that wet look that I love! My hair looks the same when it's wet. So I finally got the courage to ask her how she manages to make her hair look so nice. Her answer was hairspray, and a lot of it!


So since then I've been doing, almost everyday, what she does. Which is to pretty much weigh my hair down with hairspray. Now I know this can't be good for my hair and I'd assume with as much as I have to use it is worse than the gel. But it makes me hair look so nice! Plus I can wear it down, which I haven't done more than a few times in the last few years. Because without anything to weigh my hair down I just look like a lion or something. But I love being able to wear my hair down and show off the length that I've got.

I also asked her about growing it so long and she said that it just grows fast on it's own. She gets it trimmed fairly often because it just gets too long too fast. So I guess I won't be able to match her in that department, since my hair grows slower than a snail in molasses. :/

So does anyone have any suggestions for other ways to get these results with me hair? I can provide pictures if anybody's curious. I have very thick curly hair.

[Kaelee]

OIL!!!! If not oil, conditioner, and leave it in. Have you looked into the Curly girl method?

ETA: Aloe vera gel (the real stuff) has also been said to give good results as hair gel.

[ouseljay]

I know some people use thick leave-in conditioners to get this effect. Other people use various oils. You might need to experiment. My Other has gorgeous, curly hair, though it's short. I've been using mineral oil on my own hair (which makes it curl, oddly enough), and when I get him to use it too it makes his curls very defined. If he uses enough, they definitely look a bit wet.

[coneyisland]

In the styling products damage section of Nightshade's article on damaged hair, there are some pictures that should help you kick that habit. Here is a link to that article.


http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=79

[Kiwiwi]

Why was it suggested you stop using gel?

Gel is awesome for curlies! I only get my best, soft, bouncy curls when I use gel!

BUT I only use hair friendly gel. No harsh alcohols, no silicones. Maybe you can look for a better gel?

I also suggest learning about The Curly Girl Method if you haven't yet! Made me love my hair!

[jeanniet]

Definitely Curly Girl. The more moisture you get into your hair, the less you'll see the lion's mane effect. And use gel or curl cream to keep your curls controlled and nice looking!

Kiwiwi, what gel do you use? I haven't found a gel i really like. Sometimes I mix gel with KCCC and that works pretty well, but KCCC works fine on its own.

[Kiwiwi]

Jeanniet:
I live in the netherlands and I think what I use is a dutch brand. I will look it up for you tomorrow (it's night here now, I am in bed ^_^).

[heyshortyhey]

OIL!!!! If not oil, conditioner, and leave it in. Have you looked into the Curly girl method?

ETA: Aloe vera gel (the real stuff) has also been said to give good results as hair gel.

Yeah make sure you're getting the real stuff! I bought about 4 tubes of this one brand only to realize that it wasn't as "all natural" as it claimed! Waste of money, wasn't even good for a sunburn!!!

[Mya]

Try shea butter, it really weighs your hair down and stays there all day and longer.

[Dang3rousB3auty]

I have a gel that seems to work pretty well, it does seem to be very light hold, but the ingredients are good. There aren't alcohols or silicones in it. I like to use it when I braid my hair and want to put it down for waves. Usually my hair just gets major fluff after I let it out of the braid, but the gel seems to help the waves stay together and look nicer. I don't have curly hair so I am not sure how it would look for you.

http://www.labellamaria.com/HairSense.htm

There is a link to it, it is the third product down. They also have a hairspray and mousse. I bought mine at The Grocery Outlet. They seem to get a lot of natural brands there sometimes that I hadn't heard of or seen before.

[AgnesONutter]

I don't have curly hair...but I have hair that has very nice, well defined waves when wet and then dries to be a pouffy, frizzy mess if I don't put something into it. I second what the other's have said about oil or butters. It really works so well, if put on the lengths.

[cecemutt]

Hello Kiwiwi :)

Maybe you could link to the gel product you use so I can have a look at the ingredients?

The only gel I have tried so far is "devacurl arc angel".
Devacurl gel is a little to drying for me to use every day. (but I love how it makes my curls LOOK - not so much FEEL)

[PinkyCat]

Try LA Looks gel - super cheap and no alcohols. A lot of curlies (including moi) swear by it.

[CurlyZ]

First of all: I would stay far away from hairspray...
For my curls I usually use gel mixed up with tresemme naturals conditioner or
Paul Mitchell - the conditioner. It's a leave in conditioner but works kinda like a gel too.
And the big bottle goes a looong way.

[pepperminttea]

I'd be wary of hairspray if you're going for longer lengths.

Have you seen the Tightly Curly method (http://www.tightlycurly.com/)? I think if it works for you, it could give your hair the weight and shine you want. :)

[lapushka]

There are plenty of "good" gels out there. I use LA Looks, Eco Styler, or IC Fantasia. LA Looks is really good if you like wetter looks. Isn't there a variety in their range that has a wet look gel? *not sure*

[earthnut]

There's absolutely nothing wrong with using some hair gels or hair spray. They do not harm your hair!! It's possible that drying alcohols in hairspray might damage your hair, but not all hairsprays have drying alcohols, and few gels. Use the gel! It's fine!

Many gels have silicones in them, but if you use shampoo regularly, you don't need to worry about that either (but avoid if you're conditioner-only or low-poo).

[jeanniet]

The gel is great, but the smell! It's too strong for me, at least on wet hair. I do like the gel otherwise.

[frostbitebuck]

Thanks for all the suggestions guys! :) I'm going to be trying out the Tightly Curly method, for a few reasons. One is that it's something I can do today with the conditioner I already have. Luckily what I use happens to be on the list of good conditioners on her site. I always left a bit of conditioner in my hair but not a lot, so we will see how leaving a lot in goes! My hair is still soaking wet right now but once it dries I guess I'll know how I like it.

I always co-wash only, I don't even own a bottle of shampoo right now. XD And I use a wide toothed comb because I hate brushes. I wash my hair every day. I just can't bring myself to not wash my hair when I shower. lol