Encouragement needed :(

[Julesn]

Sigh. I am so depressed about my hair :( Some of you may know that I am currently working on growing out my bleached & damaged hair to it's natural color. I had also mentioned before that I have breakage due to the bleach. I have not touched my hair for 6 weeks (this may not seem like a ling time at all to you guys, but for me, it's a HUGE accomplishment b/c I'm used to retouching every 3-4 weeks) b/c I am DETERMINED to grow it out. Anyway, b/c my hair is growing out, I am REALLY noticing how bad the breakage is. I guess I didn't realize it was actually this bad b/c the breakage was so short, but now that it's growing out, I can sections that are about an inch long kinda sticking up. I mean, I guess that's a good thing b/c it's growing back in, right? I'm trying really hard to just focus on the postive, but I'm really sad & upset :( that my hair is in such a bad state. I'm VERY lucky b/c no one would ever be able to notice it b/c I have a ton of hair (thank God) & that other hair covers the breakage areas. I feel like just shaving my head & starting over (but I never would b/c I work in a salon & also, my husband would kill me). I'm just wondering how much longer it will be before those sections will lie flat? I am totally sentenced to wearing a headband for the next 6 months, I bet. I know I should be proud of myself b/c I have made a very firm decision to not color anymore, but I'm still depressed about all of this breakage that I have.

Sorry for the long post :( Any words of encouragement you guys could give me would be great.

Thanks

Julie :)

[Curlsgirl]

Try to wear the handband or whatever else you need to and forget about it. Shaving it is not an option so what other choice do you have? Have you tried some little cute clips to help tame it? Good that your hair covers that part! Hard to tell how long it will take to lie down but I wouldn't say too long. It will be there before you know it! And I DO know how hard it is! A lot of us have been there. It takes a while to get it in shape but believe me it is TOTALLY worth it! KUTGW!!!!! :cheese:

[Katze]

hi Julie,

we have a very similar hairtype, and I am also growing out bleached and very damaged hair. IT CAN BE DONE! :D

Lots of moisture and deep conditioning treatments, gentle washing, more moisture, and NO more heat and bleach have really helped my hair, which is now mostly virgin, look and feel a LOT better, and get long, too. Stretching washes helped me learn what amount of greasiness my hair can and can't tolerate.

Because of the damage (and serious layers) I have been trimming my hair more than it's grown, so it is taking a very, very long time to grow. But this just reminds me, when I think about being blonde again, how it is SO not worth it.

One thing that really helped me was learning to French braid my own hair when it was at its most awkward, two-toned, 'adjustment' period.

There are several threads here about stopping dyeing and many, many of us have been where you are so you are not alone - welcome to LHC and hope you find something that works for you.

:flower:

Katze

[JessTheMess]

Ugh I'm here with you darling! It seems no matter how much trimming or S&Ding I do, the damage from my heat styling and bleaching will always prevail. It brings me down lol
All you can do is keep on pampering it, and conditioning and keeping it in updos. It has drastically changed the overall condition of my hair, but the splits still end up eating whatever growth I have. Patience is virtue in growing out damage. It will be worth all of the hardwork though. Keep on keepin' on Jules, don't get down :hugs:

[spidermom]

I know it seems slow while you're going through it, but time passes so fast. You'll be looking back on this awkward stage sooner than you think. Meanwhile, gentle care and lots of deep conditioning treatments.

[Peggy E.]

Okay. Let's look at this as an opportunity, shall we? You work in a salon, which puts you in the realm of lots and lots of styling tools and toys - not just the chemical stuff. And you can wear your hair in imaginative, fashion-forward, "hair design" styles and get away with it because you are in the industry and can be "demonstrating" how much fun it is to do different things with your hair!

Unleash your imagination and use those "sticking up" pieces to your advantage. Maybe spike them up with a great leave-in conditioner. Or put those all over the head little tails. How about pin curling and wearing it with tight rings, or finger-combing and softening the rings?

Use vibrant scarves and glitzy costume jewelry, weaving through the curls, or wrapping around them. I didn't see if you mentioned just how long your hair was, but there's all sorts of things you can do with growing out hair, if you have the creative nature and the available tools - which you do. You are really very lucky!

Just remember it should be fun - while also showing the salon customers there are lots of wonderful things you can try out. Don't have to mention you're doing all this because you can't stand the length and the "growing out" problems?!!

[Islandgrrl]

Know that this horrible hair awkwardness will pass. It will get better.

Pamper the heck out of the damaged parts - I don't know how long your hair is, but you can really take care of the damaged parts by wearing your hair up and keeping it protected from further damage. I agree that headbands can really help keep sticky up parts under control. Consider deep treatments to improve the condition as much as possible.

Peggy had some great, fun suggestions (I think she's actually the Queen of Fun :) ) that you might want to try out.

Long hair, even if it's in pristine condition when you start growing it out, takes a ton of patience.

Oh, and good for you for not doing any bad hair things for six whole weeks!!! That's a major accomplishment! :flowers:

[Julesn]

THANKS SO MUCH!!! :) :) :)

You all are so great. I feel better already.

Btw, my hair is kinda short, anyway. It's about chin length, growing out from a "Posh", so it's more layered in the crown & stacked in the back.

Julie ;)

[wintersun99]

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[Solange]

Don't obsess over it or it'll just seem longer before it grows out. Do pamper your hair with overnight oil treatments and such, but relatively speaking, try to "ignore" it for a while. If headbands are necessary, get some really pretty ones you'll be excited to wear instead of even thinking about the fact that you "have" to wear them.

[Fencai]

ive been there and done that myself. My hair would actually break off when lightly blown in the wind.

It will pass. Just keep pampering it and dont worry about it! invest in some little clips and have fun!

Dont stress yourself, just keep positive and your hair will do positive things!

[Fillette]

First of all, Congratulations on doing the right thing for your hair!!! You should be proud of yourself for wanting healthier hair.
I know it is very difficult but try not to obsess too much about your hair. Try to pamper it and leave it alone as much as possible. Instead, play with your makeup, your accessories and your clothes. These should keep your mind off of your hair. Good luck!!!

[embee]

I've not done what you are doing, but I've struggled through growing out bangs, and I thought it was never going to be long enough to successfully tuck back into a ponytail! But eventually it did get there, although the growing was not all fun, I can assure you.

The time will pass. Do funky fun stuff like Peggy suggested. You can get away with that in your line of work. :)

[Julesn]

YOU ALL ARE THE BEST!!!!! :) Thank you so much!!!! :) You all have given me such great advice, but more importantly, support. I am so grateful to all of you. I will definitely try all of your wonderful suggestions. I think the hardest one will be to just forget about my hair. The iorny is that, if I can accomplish that one feat, I know the time will go by so quickly & my hair will be better before I know it. I just have to keep in mind that everyday that passes I am doing awesome things for my hair by not bleaching or blowdrying. Maybe if I try to tell myself those positive things everyday, I will feel better. With every day that passes, I am one day closer to getting to my goal of beautiful & healthy hair.

Thanks again to all of you :) :) :) I truly appreciate you.

Julie :)

[detritus]

I'm also growing out bleach damage and dye to get back my natural color. Others said it to me at the stage you are in and I'll say it to you now "this is the worst of it." Once you get two or three inches of your natural color, it starts getting a lot easier. You can see for yourself how much healthier and shinier all that new growth is, and all the stuff that broke off and is now sticking up will start to lay down. And it'll be clear to everyone around you that you aren't just getting lazy about the touch-ups, but are trying to grow out your natural color. I have about 4 inches of my natural color and going back to henna or other dyes isn't even a temptation for me anymore -- if you can stick it out for the next few months it'll get easier and easier to say no to that bottle of dye!

Also, get some pretty barrettes and headbands! One thing I really liked to do with my hair at that stage is take a little bit of hair near my hairline and part, twist it up and away from my face and continue to add more bits of hair. Then clip it back above my ears. I think it looks kind of '40s and it hides the longer hair so all the hair around your face is your natural color--not just a skunk stripe at your part. You can also take your bangs, comb them straight back, twist, and clip it back for a "poof" of hair. Think Amy Winehouse-esque without the crazy. French braids are great once you get a little more length.

You can do it! :)

[henna&ink]

Last September I had the oh-so-brilliant idea of getting a perm. (why someone didn't tackle me to the ground and refuse to get off unless I changed my mind, I'll never know) It was great for the first few months. Then as it grew the top was strait, the sides curly (not a good look) and the ends were showing the damage, so I certainly couldn't perm it again. I love super short hair, and would have no problem chopping it all off, but everyone has been begging me to grow it out. I struggled on with it until my cousin talked me into trying henna. (I know it's not the answer for you, since you're trying to go back to your natural color) It relaxed a lot of the curl, sealed in the broken parts, not to mention the color is incredible! Now I just need to figure out the right cut to trim off the ends...