Warning - TMI Thread! How to wear your hair for *special* moments?

[LifeisAdventure]

* Warning! * TMI Alert! * Turn back now all faint of heart!* :scared:



OK, drama over! I am curious to know how my fellow super-long-hairs wear their hair for intimacy. My hair is now 36" long, a few inches past tailbone for me, and after a recent "frolic" my hair was completely wrecked. And I mean wrecked - tangles in some places, greasy in other places, knots, mats, plus a lot of shed hairs left behind. I was wearing it down at the time because, well, that's what makes me feel sexy!

Despite the fact that I'm considering trimming a few inches off soon (yes, I've thought long and hard about that), what can I do to prevent this kind of hair carnage in future intimate moments? I'm pretty serious about my hair care, but I'm fed up with worrying more about my hair than I do about my partner during intimacy.

What do others with hip, TB, and longer hair do for those special times? Obviously up-dos won't work with your head down on a pillow, but when that's not the case, how do you restrain your abundant locks without taking time to (re)style your hair? How do you feel sexy AND be kind to your tresses? And I'm open to hearing about braided styles, but be forewarned that all I can do is simple, 3-strand braids and those don't look or feel very appealing to me. So what do you say? Help me long-hairs!

[Katze]

you know, I just take extra care to put my hair 'out of the way.' It's 'only' 26 inches long, but it is very easy for me and my partner to roll on it. He has long hair too, so we very often both have mouthfuls of hair if we're not careful. He usually wears a ponytail, so at least one of us has his hair out of the way.

I also sleep with my hair down and just have to be careful when BF rolls on it that I carefully separate it from his arm or shoulder.


hth!

[Hatsumomo]

Haha this sounds way familiar! In my last 'relationship'('' for good reason:mad:), I used to frequently get a slightly matted bit on the top of my head from the covers. I to worried about my hair during which got annoying for both of us. Any straightening was undone regardless:confused:...

I'll say one thing, my hair was very healthy back then because I gave up straightening it because of that.

[Poppy Seed]

How about enjoying the moment standing/sitting up? Hair doesn't get in the way quite as much.

I tend to have mine tied in some way - either bunned (in which case: I'm on top!) or plaited. Can be fun to play with a single ordinary 3-strand... ;)

[Calista]

I braid my hair, period. My partner finds me attractive enough even with a style like that. ;)

[Isilme]

both bf and I have long hair so we just take a few seconds to put it over the shoulder, over the pillow etc. He likes me having my hair down and that's usually not a problem since I'm on top very often;) on the other hand, I get to detangle his hair after... shudder: I think a braid over the shoulder is a nice way to solve the problem. How about a satin ribbon or something nice as a decoration?
And think about all the nice things you can do for your partner with loose hair...:D then the hair becomes something to use, not just something you have to put away.
I wonder how all the ladies in the old paintings from Kama *sutra and such books wear their hair...have to check.

[LifeisAdventure]

Lol Calista! My partner is actually VERY accommodating and calls me 'sexy' even with my hair in its night-time top-knot bun (which I think looks hideous)! It's more about how I feel. It's like I can feel sexy or I can worry about damaging my hair... I need more options than that!

ETA to Isilme: I totally agree with you on the possibilities of loose hair in bed, one of the many reason I love wearing it down! And a satin ribbon is a great idea... thanks! :)

[Amara]

I have had this issue too! I safe style like a figure 8 bun on the top of my head doesn't make me feel great, although, like the OP, my DH has basically said "your hair looks great down but really that's not what's on my mind at those moments!" hah. But like the OP, I would like to find something that doesn't take longer than the event itself afterward to repair hair damage. :p

What I've been doing lately is either wearing it down and just taking a moment to move it where I want it depending on what's going on, or sometimes I braid it but the braid ends only a few inches away from my head, so the tassle is really long. Does that make sense? Like, my hair is past waist, but the scrunchie at the end of the braided section is about APL. That keeps most of the hair safe and untangled while still allowing some length to be free and fly about in a sexy fashion. :D

[Lisa-Maria]

two braids work very well for me and it's a bit catholic school girl which seems to be appriciated by dbf.. ehhrrmm, and they're something he can "hold on to" at times....

[Iylivarae]

What about doing something to shorten your hair? (not cut, of course :D) I am more thinking of doing a peacock twist, and then letting the hair hang down. The hair is now shorter, so it isn't damaged, and you still have the sexy-feeling.

[Anje]

When my hair is down, the easiest, fastest solution I've found is simply to throw it sideways on the bed, so it's going more or less at a right angle from my body. At least then it isn't under me, where it gets generally trashed. Alternatively, I'll quickly braid it, then toss that sideways.

When I'm upright, my hair is generally OK, but it has tickle potential. Easily remedied by an inside-out bun.

[Silver & Gold]

I take a hairstick with me and I've mastered the 2 second updo with a hairstick. So during intimate moments I'm sometimes having loose hair and at other times I stick it up. That way I have the best of both worlds at all times no matter what we are doing at the moment.

[LaurelSpring]

Thank you for starting this thread! It came at a very good moment. My hair is just now getting past BSL and I have a new steady Bf again now and just started realizing last night afterwards that I had a little delimma. I love the suggestions! Even at APL though I kept What I called the BJ scrunci by the bed (unless someone discovers the hair conditioning properties of....)

[podo]

Mine usually stays in whatever style it was in before we got going. DH isn't looking at my hair....

I don't have too much problem if it's down, unless...um..there's a lot of moving around. And then I just take a second to pull my hair out from underneath one or the other of us. He knows that if I pat his arm/leg/head/body/whatever and whimper he's on my hair and he'll lift whatever body part is in the way so I can move my hair.

Train him while you're asleep. He'll roll on your hair and give him a small pat and a whimper and he'll learn to move.

[thankyousir74]

How about two three strand braids (oiled before hand)? It doesnt seem like they'd get in the way too much.

[bex487]

I always pulled mine into a high style-high pony or bun, so that way I could rest my head on the pillow and the elastic wouldn't bother me.

My boyfriend always liked when I made two braids because he liked to call them "reins." Yeah...

[Eboshi]

Modly reminder to everyone posting in this thread to keep it "PG-13" and to remember that what is posted in the "Mane" forum is accessible to anyone on the net.

[burns_erin]

Since you are together this should be just as much his responsibility as yours. If I do not have mine thrown back over the pillow like I do when sleeping, sometimes DH would (when mine was long enough, lol) wrap it around his hand or forearm. Very..aggressive. A silk or satin pillowcase should help too, I make sure the pillow under my head is a 600 thread count or higher, since I do not have silk or satin.

[Carolyn]

You might want to search for "cooking" threads on the old LHC ;) We've had several interesting discussions on this topic :p

[spidermom]

I go to bed with either a braid on the side behind one ear or a top-knot bun. When things get sweet, I leave my hair alone. The top-knot bun usually becomes a top-ponytail, then starts to slide down. Sometimes DH or I will pull the scrunchie off, sometimes not. I've had more than one massive detangling session after such times, but it's worth it.

[Lady Godiva]

You might want to search threads at the LHC archives, as this subject has come up before, and there were suggestions made previously.

It's more about how I feel. It's like I can feel sexy or I can worry about damaging my hair... I need more options than that!You got it. It's a trade-off, so the bottom line is you have to decide what you ultimately want. Since this is a long hair board, I'll take the point-of-view of hair care.

You have to decide how much damage your hair can take, factoring in type as well as length, as fine hair can't tolerate as much activity as coarse hair can. It's a simple mathematical situation:
hair left down + more activity = more damage
hair in a secure updo + little activity = little damage
If neither extreme is desirable, opt for a middle position:
hair in ponytail AND/OR moderate activity = moderate damage
There are various other factors to consider that will add or subtract from health or damage. Again, you have to decide, as this affects your fine hair type, especially.

You also may have to redefine how you view yourself, whether you *need* your hair completely down to feel best about yourself at such times.

[willowcandra]

I usually put mine in a braid with a long tassle. That way tangles don't happen but there is still some loosish hair.

dh likes two braids too.:rolleyes:-but he is also very cautious about it and will move my braid if it is in danger lol.

[AlleyKitten]

I usually put it in a braid, which keeps it out of the way well enough during, especially if I toss it up over the pillow so it's not under my head. I've pretty much resigned myself to having to re-do whatever my hair is in afterward though, as it gets loosened so much that even if I don't need to comb it, I do need to rebraid it. Sometimes I'll just put it in a really loose, fast braid since I know it's not going to be in long and it just needs to be out of our faces.

I've really got to teach my boyfriend to braid his own hair, since his (mbl, usually in a ponytail) actually gets in the way a lot more than mine!

[Calista]

(unless someone discovers the hair conditioning properties of....)
Cool idea - a protein treatment... :eyebrows:

And I didn´t realize there were so many men out there who like their gals in double braids. Got to try that! :D

[Haith]

I just let my hair be in whatever style it is in. Sometimes if its up, he'll take it down. He likes to have his fingers in it. Also, I've gotten pretty good at doing the "one-armed swipe" where I can swish my hair away from my necK and over the pillow on my way, and I also keep a hairstick on my bedside table to twirl it up if I need to. I've never really noticed much damage, but what I have noticed is how uncomfortable it is to lay on my hair. If the full length is streched out under me, it makes it difficult to move my head. I hate when this happens!

[jivete]

I really like this thread. I know I had a moment of panic the other day where I was grabbing for the satin pillow, as discretely as I could because I did not want my hair rubbing against the normal sheets. It's kind of bad when you're in such an intimate situation and worrying about your hair. But I've seen the damage not worrying about it can cause. It's not pretty.

[shrimp]

Honestly - my hair is the last thing on my mind at these times.

Enjoy yourself, forget about the hair and deal with it later. If it's in the way you'll move it. I guess it's something you get used to over time as well.

There really are some things in life more important than hair :wink:

[angelthadiva]

Honestly - my hair is the last thing on my mind at these times.

Enjoy yourself, forget about the hair and deal with it later. If it's in the way you'll move it. I guess it's something you get used to over time as well.

There really are some things in life more important than hair :wink:

This is exactly what I was thinking...DH and I have been together for 12 years, we have 3 kids, we both work full-time and go to school, and run 2 home based businesses...When either of us has "hearts in their eyes", we are just glad to have a moment to act on it. :eyebrows:

[vindo]

Nothing easier than that :)

I am almost at classic length, my hair started interfering at midback length.

So I have learned how to keep it out of the way. Many times my hair is up anyway but if it is down I really know how to move so it does not get in the way too much.
I know that the missionary and other on the back positions can be horror for hair.
I started flipping my hair to the side before I lay down first...even if things get really 'wild' I am still fast enough to pull out my hair.
May sound stiff and planned but if you have literally grown in to it you won't even notice it yourself anymore.
Like I said sometimes I just move the right way without using my hands..if things get difficult I can still pull it away before I lay down on it.
Other positions are not a problem once you master this..;)

HTH

[SHELIAANN1969]

I wear a pony tail with a scunchie then loop the pony halfway through again. It keeps it out if the way and I am not laying on it, pulling it or tearing ot out accidentially.



ETA: It hurts to be laying on your hair pulling it, ouchie!

[SparklePi]

For some reason I never had the tangling during mating:p problem with anyone before current DH :confused: even though my hair was for part of that time even longer?!?
It's below waist to hip length now.
With this DH, hair tangling mess is a BIG PROBLEM. I got reallllly tired of the mega detangle session after sweet ya know sessions. Asked a hairdresser for advice and he said to wrap my head with my hair and do a do-rag, or get a satin pillow.
I didn't do either, i just either lay my hair over the pillow or at a right angle away from me/us as a PP said, or keep it braided (one English braid) which is my usual nighttime 'do anyway. DH LOVES my long hair but HATES it on his face, LOL, so this complicates things further, in pretty much any position. What a TMI thread, but practical!!
huggles,
Holly

[Chromis]

I just put it in a single braid. Since this is my normal sleeping style anyhow, it's not like it takes me any more time to do this. If it's not going to be sleeping time afterwards, I'll either braid it or just stay in a position that doesn't involve laying on my back.

[Alethia]

I'm a single braid person, or swoop it back over my pillow if on my back. It works wonders for your posture if you keep it loose when you're on top though ( you have to sit tall/arch back)! I did that more when I was younger though and had an abdomen to be proud of. :) Mind you, my hair doesn't really tangle unless I leave it loose on windy car journeys. I've had long hair for so much of my adult life, I don't really think about what I do with it. I've rarely had my DP lean on it or anything like that.

[Medvssa]

I guess it's something you get used to over time as well.

Yes, you do. You learn to lay or move in a certain way so that your hair (or your partner's) is not under you or in the way, or in your mouth :lol:

My hair is not particularly long (bsl or so when dry) but my BF's is at hip. And I would be so sad if he would put it up! (not gonna happen :D) for what do I want hair if I cannot enjoy it?

I found that slippery satin pillows help a lot too. Hair just doesn't get caught as easily. And afterwards, a session of detangling in the shower with conditioner on can be a good idea too.

[peacecat3]

:lol: I've come to the conclusion that being intimate is bad for long hair. My long hair has been healthiest when I'm NOT with anybody. ;)

Be that as it may: my hair's currently between waist and TB -ish, and it's gotten to the length that I can no longer lift my shoulders to get it out from under me, because it's also caught under my hips. If I have a spare moment, I will do a single nape braid, or a ponytail with bands down the length. The BF seems to enjoy the braid more, since strands escape and it still ends up looking messy. It's doubly amusing because he's growing his hair out too, so we both take a moment beforehand and tie our hair back. :eyebrows:

[Takethevitamin]

I usually have my hair back when I'm around the house, so it naturally ends up in a messy bun, ponytail, or braid, or some other concoction when we make love.

If we end up playing after a special day, then my hair is however it was styled. If we end up playing when my hair is sopping wet from the shower, well...it might just be in a towel. We are beyond all of that pretense.

If, for some reason, I consciously think to fix my hair prior, I'd probably do a simple "half-up, half-down" or a similar hairstyle: he can still run his fingers through it, it won't get in either of our faces, and there's less to tangle. Another hairstyle which would work well is parting your hair in the center, and separating each side as if you were doing a half-up style, but then taking each individual side and clipping that back with a barrette, while the back is combed down regularly. It looks very pretty, I think.

My Husband's hair is a mass of beautiful curls -- I'm so jealous...all he needs is a CO, and a finger comb, and he looks like a million-bucks.

[LifeisAdventure]

Thank you for starting this thread! ...Even at APL though I kept What I called the BJ scrunci by the bed (unless someone discovers the hair conditioning properties of....)

You're welcome, and thanks for the chuckle!


Train him while you're asleep. He'll roll on your hair and give him a small pat and a whimper and he'll learn to move.

Another lol! And a good suggestion, thanks!


Modly reminder to everyone posting in this thread to keep it "PG-13" and to remember that what is posted in the "Mane" forum is accessible to anyone on the net.

Yeah, I definitely worried a LOT about where to place the thread before I posted, but in the end I trusted in my dear LHCers to remain as PC as possible. ETA: And there it went! :)


You might want to search for "cooking" threads on the old LHC ;) We've had several interesting discussions on this topic :p

Thanks!


For some reason I never had the tangling during mating:p problem with anyone before current DH :confused: even though my hair was for part of that time even longer?!?
It's below waist to hip length now... DH LOVES my long hair but HATES it on his face, LOL, so this complicates things further, in pretty much any position. What a TMI thread, but practical!!
huggles,
Holly

Hehe, men are so fickle, aren't they? :)


My Husband's hair is a mass of beautiful curls -- I'm so jealous...all he needs is a CO, and a finger comb, and he looks like a million-bucks.

My DBF is the same way! Just a shower with any old product will do and he steps out with these shiny, silky, luxurious black curls... So lucky! :)


Thanks everyone for some great responses! I really appreciate the ideas and knowing that I'm not alone in my dilemma!

[trolleypup]

Always down...but it is long enough to mostly stay where it is placed...one is careful, of course, to start off with it trapped. For the inevitable times when it gets in the way, a brief pause to rearrange is no issue. Tangles aren't too much of a problem, top or bottom.

[Amoretti]

If you don't do it in bed you minimize the problem. ;)

[Dianyla]

Always down...but it is long enough to mostly stay where it is placed...
This is where it's advantageous to have very long hair. Hair shorter than classic/TB length tends to get everywhere. Once it gets past classic, there's enough length and weight to anchor it and it will hold itself down when tossed over a pillow or over the edge of the bed. :)

Hmmm, I don't think we've ever managed to get our hair tangled together. Yet. :twisted:

[trolleypup]

Hmmm, I don't think we've ever managed to get our hair tangled together. Yet. :twisted:
Getting tangled in hair, yes, but not hair on hair tangles.

[tigerlily83]

I never thought about putting it in a certain style when we're having our "special" moments. To be honest my DH loves it when my long hair (BSL at the time....last summer) was everywhere. I never had an issue with it being tangled. I do make sure he doesn't accidentally lean on it, because if he does...I definitely let him know.

[RustedAngel]

I just about always put my hair up, preferably in a braid low to the neck, but a pony tail if I'm caught "hair down" and need to react quickly. But 1) I'm a guy and 2) one person I was with recently didn't really care for my long hair.

When I have been fortunate enough to have a long hair girl, we usually put it up in a braid. This seems to do a good job of protecting it, keeping it out of the way and preventing tangles.

HTH!

[LifeisAdventure]

This is where it's advantageous to have very long hair. Hair shorter than classic/TB length tends to get everywhere. Once it gets past classic, there's enough length and weight to anchor it and it will hold itself down when tossed over a pillow or over the edge of the bed. :)

Hmmm, I don't think we've ever managed to get our hair tangled together. Yet. :twisted:

Hehe, I can only IMAGINE how awful it would be to untangle entwined hair! And for the record, the session that left my hair wrecked was a spontaneous go on a couch, so unfortunately no throwing it over a pillow on that one! Come to think of it, the material probably didn't help things much. :( Oh well, totally worth it. :eyebrows:

Maybe another good question to add to this thread is how to RESCUE your hair post-intimacy. Is a good deep condition the best I can really do? Should I buy some kid-friendly detangling spray and try to work out the tangles in dry hair? I like the idea of an oiled braid, in truth, but that takes planning which I don't often employ. ;)

Good to hear from the guys too, by the way! Long haired men are sexy! :)

[Dianyla]

Maybe another good question to add to this thread is how to RESCUE your hair post-intimacy. Is a good deep condition the best I can really do? Should I buy some kid-friendly detangling spray and try to work out the tangles in dry hair? I like the idea of an oiled braid, in truth, but that takes planning which I don't often employ. ;)
A very gentle dry detangling session (occasionally with a little oil added) works fine for me. I dunno, maybe it's just my hair type, but I haven't particularly noticed any serious damage that needed "rescuing". :shrug:

[Saoirse]

I always read these threads for the LOLs. Just sayin'.

[Nat242]

I only have waist length hair - but I love those tangles!

[RavenDream]

I usually put it over the pillow above me. The guy I've been involved with, no matter how much I tell him not to, always takes my hair out of its 'do. Thankfully I use a lot of cones in my routine so not too many tangles form.

[Kimberly]

When he sees me start to braid my hair, he gets a look Pavlov would recognize . . .

[AlleyKitten]

When he sees me start to braid my hair, he gets a look Pavlov would recognize . . .

:eyebrows: For my boyfriend, it's me taking off my glasses! It's hilarious how much Pavlov is relevant to our lives!

[morgwn]

I've found it difficult so far to put my hair up at all or have it braided as my DHTB just loves to run his hands through my hair. A satin pillowcase and being in a 'sitting up' position most of the time is my only insurance method at present. Luckily my hair is now long enough to stay over my shoulder most of the time. :)

[Elettaria]

Single plait or quick bun at the nape of the neck with a scrunchie, both of which I can lie down on. I don't always bother.

As for tangles, the key thing is to not to let them fester overnight. I've got liquid coconut oil in a spray bottle and I've used that once or twice, though more often when I've been lazy and left my hair in a plait for two days. I spray it on while the hair is still in its messy plait and then start untangling. The hair ends up a lot more oily than usual, so I replait it and use it as an opportunity for a deep oiling treatment. If nothing else, oiled plaits stay far neater.

It's not so much the tangles afterward that get me, it's the hairs that get pulled out when you're rolling around and start wrapping themselves around toes or worse. I'm still not sure whether he noticed the way I was periodically grabbing at my left foot last night. "Hang on, there's a hair around somewhere..." was a frequent cry in the early days of our relationship, until I learnt to keep a scrunchie by the bed. And you know what it's like when you're convinced that there really is a hair in the bed and are searching for it, while your partner thinks your crazy and just wants to get on with more romantic occupations?

Another advantage of taming the hair in advance is if you're likely to be flinging your glasses around the bed, or putting them on, taking them off, putting them back on again five minutes later. I don't that often, I'm only at -6 (just into severe myopia), but my boyfriend's vision is at around -17 and his focal point is the end of his nose, so he quite likes to be able to see what he's doing.

[Gladtobemom]

I give it a real quick loose 8-10 turn braid and put a hair friendly covered elastic on it (a thin one so it doesn't make a bump if it's under me). And DH knows NOT to put his weight on my hair, he just flips the braid out of his way. Elbows on hair can really spoil the mood.

I also have found that the sheets make a difference. I like Modal fabric for sheets, it's super soft and hair slides rather that mat. (And they aren't sweaty and don't fly off the bed like satin.)

[NorthernDancer]

LOL!

What a great way to end a friday, laughing away!

While this post is way TMI, it's all in a good way! Thanks for some of the good ideas.......

[Rain]

I do not do my hair for the happy fun time. Ever. I either flip it back behind my pillow or let it spill down onto his skin. Or some other things that I won't go into here. I honestly don't care what happens to it as long as it's not getting yanked the wrong way. I am never going to stop in the heat of the moment to braid.

[Melian]

My hair is mostly already up or braided. So either it is in the 'do I already have or it is braided quickly.

[Patrycja]

I am so glad this is a thread now.

Well...not as glad as I would have been when me and my husband were still together...

Anyway-I get so HOT when my hair is down during everything.I hate how I look when it's up during the deed because I feel so "mommie-like".Having a chance when I can let my inner Victoria Secret gal come out is wonderful but 5 minutes on having it down,I'm practically dying.I've gotten so many ideas so far,thanks! :flowers:

Just wish I could use em :lol:

[Gladtobemom]

Umm, men a are awflully trainable you know.

It took just a few times of, "give me 30 seconds!" While he watches me quickly do a quick loose braid just behind my left ear and anchor it with an elastic.

Now, all I have to do is start braiding my hair in that manner and he's ready to go.

[LifeisAdventure]

I am so glad this is a thread now.

Well...not as glad as I would have been when me and my husband were still together...

Anyway-I get so HOT when my hair is down during everything.I hate how I look when it's up during the deed because I feel so "mommie-like".Having a chance when I can let my inner Victoria Secret gal come out is wonderful but 5 minutes on having it down,I'm practically dying.I've gotten so many ideas so far,thanks! :flowers:

Just wish I could use em :lol:

I'm so sorry to hear about your parting of ways, Patrycja! Who knows though? Love doesn't end at 30 or 50 or even 80, you may very well have a chance to use all these tips and tricks again. :heartbeat

[EmpressRi]

I pull it back or I wear my scarf. I don't care if it doesn't look sexy lol my hair is too thick and gets hot easily if it's in my face. Plus on more than one occasion my hair has gotten too close to his mouth, and while he likes the scent I'm sure the taste isn't all that great so he's a fan of the scarf too lol.

[Presto]

:D I read the first page and the current page... That's a lot of replies! I shall go read the rest later.
Lying down I just flip mine up over the pillow, that works fine.
Or I climb up and give him kisses inside the "hair tent" before sitting up on top and sexily swinging it around and making a quick bun. I get a lot of fun, and so does he, out of mimicking the round and round motion as I put up the bun, if you get what I mean. It is finally long enough to stay by itself! Well, it stays for long enough at least. :D

[Alun]

We often have our hair braided to sleep in anyway, both of us, but if we don't, then I don't think either of us think it's a big deal. If mine is loose I often tie it in a ponytail, but really only to keep it out of DW's face, not to protect my hair. Mind you, neither of us has hair longer than waist length.

We used to know another couple where she said that he had to tie his long hair back because she said otherwise it felt like she was being ****ed by Jesus!

There, now I've upset the religious types. Sorry, I really didn't mean to offend anyone, but I thought it was amusing and thought others might too. Nobody really knows for sure that Jesus had long hair anyway.

[Calista]

Alun, thankfully you chose a word that got asterisked by the forum software, so we will never know what you were going to say anyway! :lol:

[Alun]

Alun, thankfully you chose a word that got asterisked by the forum software, so we will never know what you were going to say anyway! :lol:

No, I blanked it out myself.

[saracuda]

That's hilarious, Alun! Thanks!

[sahiba]

Now ladies we have discussed about hair styles in all situations...while sleeping, in a flight, to the dentist, during car journeys and even for formal and informal functions. What do you do with hair in bed and I mean in bed with him.My hubby loves long hair but at night certain actions can be damaging :blushing:, right? So, any ideas... braids:no: make me feel really unsexy and buns are not comfortable. So what say?

[PseudoScot]

I know there have been threads on this before [it's a common topic] but am not sure off hand what to tell you to search for... Will have a look and post back in a moment with some links.

ETA:

Here is a thread on your topic (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=9510&highlight=intimate)

[Kirin]

I just let it loose and don't worry about what damage I will get. Its worth it in the long run :)

[Aisha25]

I just let it loose and don't worry about what damage I will get. Its worth it in the long run :)
But don't they get pulled out? ouchy

[sahiba]

But don't they get pulled out? ouchy

I was not worried about this problem because it never happened till now( you don't think we are :taz: :);) ) just that they might get a bit weak and all dirty.

[Euphony]

But don't they get pulled out? ouchy
Sometimes, but rarely if both of your are conscious of the fact that there's a lot of hair...somewhere. The only trick is keeping in mind where the hair is laying at.

[Aisha25]

I was not worried about this problem because it never happened till now( you don't think we are :taz: :);) ) just that they might get a bit weak and all dirty.
:lol:

Sometimes, but rarely if both of your are conscious of the fact that there's a lot of hair...somewhere. The only trick is keeping in mind where the hair is laying at.
Oh ok I was abit worried it might happen in the future,I am so paranoid about my hairs:rolleyes:

[lora410]

I just leave mine loose and flind it up and over the pillow :)

[Haith]

I leave mine loose as well, and I've gotten pretty good at sweeping it out of the way with one arm. In other *ahem*:o positions, it doesn't cause a problem.

[sahiba]

I leave mine loose as well, and we've both gotten pretty good at sweeping it out of the way with one arm. I usually sweep it over the edge or top of the pillow. In other *ahem*:o positions, it doesn't cause a problem.

Let me know those positions my friend :beerchug: because I am definetely doing something wrong as we are getting a bit uncomfortable now.:)

[bunnii]

I'm really not fussed about my hair during happy hours ;) after I might worry but I deep condition and tell myself my hair still loves me haha.

[Curlsgirl]

I'm really not fussed about my hair during happy hours ;) after I might worry but I deep condition and tell myself my hair still loves me haha.

"Happy hours" hee hee!!! I love that!

I don't worry either. I leave it down because that is the most comfortable. The only problem I don't like is catching my hair in, under and between everything from his arm, hands, sheets etc. THAT has been very annoying as my hair grows out. But I have learned to deal with it the best I can.

[memphisluvr]

My 'favorite' part is when it gets trapped under my back and gradually makes my head tilt further and further back. Then when I finally notice it's all "wait! eeehh! I'm trapped!" What's ReALLY bad is when I can't raise up for catching it under my elbows.

So, ideally, it gets thrown up over my head when necessary though I don't typically remember to do that till I get trapped at least once.

[sahiba]

"Happy hours" hee hee!!! I love that!

I don't worry either. I leave it down because that is the most comfortable. The only problem I don't like is catching my hair in, under and between everything from his arm, hands, sheets etc. THAT has been very annoying as my hair grows out. But I have learned to deal with it the best I can.

I know "Happy hours" was quite funny.
I guess what puts me off after "Happy hours" is not my but his sweat on my mane .And now that I have made quite a few imaginations run wild :run:

[Curlsgirl]

I know "Happy hours" was quite funny.
I guess what puts me off after "Happy hours" is not my but his sweat on my mane .And now that I have made quite a few imaginations run wild :run:

Aw, I say don't sweat it. LOL! I'm killing myself! :)

[Lisa-Maria]

Ahh the neck pains one can get... well well, it's worth it. I love my hair but i love him more! It's mostly kept in whatever style it's when the "happy hours" start ;)

[spidermom]

I generally go to bed with a high ponytail, sometimes wrapped into a scrunchie bun, or a braid behind one ear, coming over one shoulder. I leave it like that, although the scrunchie ponytail thing will generally come down all by itself and has to be re-done later.

[Aronomy]

I usually just let it get thrashed. :)

Edit: Or pigtails!

[Haith]

Let me know those positions my friend :beerchug: because I am definetely doing something wrong as we are getting a bit uncomfortable now.:)


Oh no... you can't be serious...:o

[j4zzin]

Laying down I can push it off to the side, and on top I just stick a bedside clip (I always end up poking him if I use a stick) in my hair really fast to get it out of the way. We've learned to adapt to it. Despite our efforts, it seems inevitable that hair will end up tangled. I just keep a small spray bottle with a mix of conditioner, coconut oil, and some water to detangle and moisturize with whenever my hair is tangled.

If nothing else, use the tangled hair as an excuse to do some post-game bonding by getting the tangles out together!

[brightonwoman]

How about braiding just the top 6 inches (or 10 inches, or whatever)...then leaving the tail nice and long and loose...the braided part will contain/protect it a bit, but you still get the loose and sexy part. :)

[FrannyG]

Aw, I say don't sweat it. LOL! I'm killing myself! :)

You're killing me too, just so you know! :rollin:

[Elphie]

This was an informative and hysterical thread. I thought it would a great place to also make a first post!

[lookingglass]

Satin pillowcases...

[Friesiangirl]

I can gladly say, I don't have to worry about special times yet. I can only imagine... My hair finds it's way to disturb kissing, and I bet it'll be worse for me in the future.

All the more reasons for me to practice abstinence for now ! LOL

Hayley

[zen_oven]

I don't worry too much about it. My partner thinks I look really cute with braids, so that is good sometimes. He loves my hair and is looking forward to it reaching my waist (long way off, le sigh). My biggest problem is that he likes to. . . ah. . . pull on it. :eyebrows:

[Iphinoe]

Give me a moment while I warm up my PG-13 Euphemism muscles.

After reading this thread today, I decided to take mental notes, since 'bed head' used to be a significant problem for me, but lately hasn't been an issue.

Variable: Since I have eschewed my old student futon for DH's 'real' bed, I have discovered our *special* moments also seem to coincide with the semi-regular meetings of our Neighbourhood Rodent's Cheese Addicts Anonymous, who appear to hold their (at times) raucous meetings in our mattress. Or it could be the local chapter of Squeak Loud and Proud, we've been too distracted to investigate closely.

As a result, we tend to aim for an approximately 45 degree angle across the mattress to minimize the, uh, disturbance of the meeting members, who are prone to vocal protesting.

This angle encourages my hair to simply hang off the edge of the mattress. If my person is vertical, my hair does not tend to be in the way, and if I'm training my "Where did my contact fall?" searching skills my hair tends sweep over my shoulder.

How'd I do?

In other news, I have discovered that now I have vowed liberate my hair from cones, I need to be very, very careful when handling my hair during *special* moments. Like the proverb about 'One man's trash is another man's treasure', some things can be both a boon and a bane. 'Nuff said.

[longhairedfairy]

I can't believe I didn't see this thread before. It was something I had been wanting to ask about for a long time, lol.

[sahiba]

Satin pillowcases...

And who uses pillow under the head ... it restricts your movement and one may like surfing the entire bed.:blueeek:

[sahiba]

I don't worry too much about it. My partner thinks I look really cute with braids, so that is good sometimes. He loves my hair and is looking forward to it reaching my waist (long way off, le sigh). My biggest problem is that he likes to. . . ah. . . pull on it. :eyebrows:

Now that is what Aisha was worried about too. Lets see what she has to say on it.:neutral:

[CountessDeJager]

This is embarrassing, I don't remember! :wail: But I can't recall any problems either so it must work. I'll be back home with my husband in a week and I'll have to encourage him to study this problem with me. :graduate:

[LifeisAdventure]

Awww... congrats CountessDeJager and best of luck! I suppose we won't be seeing you around the boards for a few days :wink:

And lol to Iphinoe, who deserves a gold star for her euphemisms! They were so clean it took me a couple reads to really pick up on them!

Since starting this thread I have invested in a few good scrunchies to keep at hand for special times, which are quite convenient I might add! I'm especially a fan of the high ponytail, although I still can't get the quick braiding thing down. Practice makes perfect, I guess. :eyebrows:

[trolleypup]

Lots of suggestions in older pages of this (and other threads).

Past certain lengths, it gets to be much less of a concern/problem (Did you know that hair can be train to "Sit!" and "Stay!")

:misskim:

Being not in a hurry, and both being aware of it means you can pause and arrange before it gets to the "OUCH Pinned!" stage.

Positions...if your hair is relatively short, being on top does keep it out of harms way...and I'm sure a little imagination and investigation should turn up just a few other positions that are hair safe or hair protective.

[CountessDeJager]

Awww... congrats CountessDeJager and best of luck! I suppose we won't be seeing you around the boards for a few days :wink::

I've only been away a week rather than deployed away from home for months. That's what makes the lack of memory so embarrassing! :oops: The thought of spending as much time as I do at TLHC on another fun activity...well wow, I would need to some up with a super protective style! :happydance:


Being not in a hurry, and both being aware of it means you can pause and arrange before it gets to the "OUCH Pinned!" stage.

This is where having a long haired partner (or formerly long haired one) makes a lot of difference. They know from experience what an interruption an accidental tug is. Even without experience on their own hair a lover can certainly learn to be cautious about hair location just as a caring partner knows to work gently around a sore muscle or old injury.

Another thought not related to anything said here yet, you know your hair best. Think twice if your partner is impatient about the time it takes for you to make yourself comfortable and prevent detangling work later (which might be on your mind taking away from enjoyment of the moment). It comes under the same category as any other consideration made for the equal satisfaction of one partner rather than the instant gratification of the other. How much fun are you really having if you can not (different from situations where you choose not to) speak up for yourself to say "This is what I need to do"?

[josie4]

I leave mine loose and deal with the tangles afterward. If it's damp when we start I have really nice waves and curls when we finish. :)

[Arctic_Mama]

When my hair was longer I still usually left it down, but slung it over the pillow. DH has long hair too and his always gets in our mouths if it's not tied back, as it's more slippery than mine (stick straight vs. curly with the same fineness makes a world of difference, surprisingly). A braid would be my default to protect it, but I confess I'd rather deal with some nasty snags and feel like a goddess than restrain it when it gets past BSL again. We'll see though, the snags may change my mind!

[Bill D.]

This is embarrassing, I don't remember! :wail: But I can't recall any problems either so it must work. I'll be back home with my husband in a week and I'll have to encourage him to study this problem with me. :graduate:

Which we will need to do *most* scientifically.

[salamander]

I generally notice a couple minutes in that we both have hair in our mouths and put it in a quick braid. Perhaps if it occurred to me earlier I'd do something fancier, but a straight up English braid seems to work fine.

[Solange]

I'm afraid a braid probably is the most convenient and hair-safe way. Loose hair is possible too...ideal for slow motion mode, though, which can be very sensual. The bottom line is, no matter how you have your hair, it should move *before* you do, but loose hair requires extra care.

[Anje]

Satin pillowcases...
Heh, I wish. My pillow (satin or otherwise) is generally not allowed to stay behind my head.

[CountessDeJager]

Which we will need to do *most* scientifically.

Why is it I only noticed this the day after he left for another trip? :doh:

Yes, lots of study with many variables. :eyebrows: I already have one conclusion though, even if your soft curls do tickle me from time to time seeing them loose is worth it! I love your hair, Bill. :cloud9:

[Fairlight63]

I was wondering what do you do with your hair when it is "cuddleing" time with DH? My hair is below shoulder length now & I usually put it in a braid but sometimes he pulls it accidently. I am afraid to say anything because one time I said "ouch" he said "why don't you cut off that hair?" I said "OK, I am going to shave my head" but I would never do that. I think that he would be delighted if I cut my hair short, but I like it long & don't want to cut it.
I have always had hair pretty short & as it gets longer it is getting in the way during that "time". So what do you do with your hair when it is cuddle time?

[jojo]

Im just growing mine until its long enough to strangle him with my braid * joking* well maybe not today he has got on my nerves!

[ReddishRocks]

I totally sympathize... my husband tends to lean on my hair at the worst times. ;) I will twist it lightly at the nape of my neck and pull it to the side he isn't occupying. He has gotten pretty good at avoiding it.

[spidermom]

Top-of-head ponytail.

[mommy101405]

Honestly my dh likes it touching him and would never tell me to cut it short. I'm usually the one threatening that. Its only APL and there have been some incidents with leaning on it or something but nothing major yet. I'll have to see if that changes if it gets longer. He also likes low pigtails so that may be an option.

[eiyela]

He has long hair too, so my sweetie is pretty good at avoiding it! :lol: But if it does become a hassle I'll just braid it real quick. Then I can tickle him with the tassle too. :p

[CestMadeleine]

I have the same problem. I usually braid it in pig tails but if I don't and he pulls it I gently tug at it and he gets the idea :P

[inspiral]

braids work best for me, they protect individual strands from being pulled, but then its still down and pretty and fun to play with!;)

[sahiba]

Braids for me too.

[OhioLisa]

My guy loves my hair down (no, seriously... he takes my hairsticks out of my updo as soon as he walks through the door) so he is usually more conscious of my hair's location than I am. :p

[Nat242]

We had a thread on this topic a little while ago - I searched for it but couldn't find it. Anyone?

[rags]

My hair is only just below shoulders now, but I had waist length for years - my DH would have killed me had I braided it. He loves the feel of it. I would just sweep it up above my head if needed (or he would).

[NebraskaChick84]

I wear it loose so he can play with it :)

[Amoretti]

If it's just "cuddling" it doesn't get in the way. ;)

[RavennaNight]

I put it up in a ponytail and leave my long APL ex-bangs to hang down on the sides. Thats his favorite hairstyle that I wear, so its really nice for those moments. Or its just down, he moves it if he needs to, or holds it up for me. He has never told me to cut it. He loves long hair.

[dancingmegs]

If it's just "cuddling" it doesn't get in the way. ;)
Exactly. It's when things get more active that it becomes a consideration. I always do one braid, mostly because that's how my hair is 90% of the time anyway. But every so often I take it down, just for kicks. Horrible tangles ensue, but it's occasionally worth it. ;)

[LisaJaney]

Three posts. Huh.

[Drynwhyl]

I wear it loose, usually. He has long hair too, so it's just a big furry bunch when we kiss :P
And he loves the feeling of hair across his skin, so it's okay with both of us.

[Ade]

Braids for sleeping, a folded braid held with a big barrette for other things. He does like to play with braid tassels!

[sedonia]

Three posts. Huh.

:confused: What does this mean?

[Nat242]

:confused: What does this mean?

I think it's a raised eyebrow at the fact that such a topic was posted by someone with only 3 posts on the forum. If I'm interpreting wrong, let me know LJ.

[Bene]

We had a thread on this topic a little while ago - I searched for it but couldn't find it. Anyone?


you mean this (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=9510) one?

[Nat242]

you mean this (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=9510) one?

Yes, Bene, thank you!

[sedonia]

I think it's a raised eyebrow at the fact that such a topic was posted by someone with only 3 posts on the forum. If I'm interpreting wrong, let me know LJ.

Huh. Nice way to greet new members. I wonder if there will ever be a fourth?

[Eboshi]

Huh. Nice way to greet new members. I wonder if there will ever be a fourth?
I've noticed that the topics that newbies tend to start are among the lines of: "What does [TLHC abbreviation] mean?" "What is my hair type?" "Should I trim off the damage or let it grow out?" etc.

When a newbie with so very few posts starts a topic like this one, or a "show me your hair" or "I want to see pictures NOW" or "I like long hair on ladies but I'm not growing it myself" etc it's going to cause concern.

[sedonia]

I've noticed that the topics that newbies tend to start are among the lines of: "What does [TLHC abbreviation] mean?" "What is my hair type?" "Should I trim off the damage or let it grow out?" etc.

Well, if you look at her other 2 posts, they seem completely in line with that norm.


When a newbie with so very few posts starts a topic like this one, or a "show me your hair" or "I want to see pictures NOW" or "I like long hair on ladies but I'm not growing it myself" etc it's going to cause concern.

Maybe. Why not give someone the benefit of the doubt rather than dropping vague, passive aggressive comments in the middle of a thread that isn't actually causing any problems, one that deals with a topic that has been discussed before by plenty of long-timers?

Or do something that is actually constructive, like suggest that the newcomer go to the introductions page and give an introduction. Not everyone is well-versed in internet etiquette. That doesn't mean they deserve to be treated as problems waiting to happen.

[Lady Verity]

I just don't. :D I am cold.

[Orchid]

I've never had any issues with that. Most of the time it's gently stroked and moved as needed. It's never gotten in the way or been a pain for me and the other person always seems to love touching it and being gentle. Most of the time mine is down and free.

[NebraskaChick84]

Maybe. Why not give someone the benefit of the doubt rather than dropping vague, passive aggressive comments in the middle of a thread that isn't actually causing any problems, one that deals with a topic that has been discussed before by plenty of long-timers?
I agree, different strokes for different folks. why not just wait it out instead of assuming the worst of everyone? I have to admit that's kind of disturbing, when you *could* just PM a mod with your concerns instead of chasing off possibly legitimate newbies. :o

[Eboshi]

I agree, different strokes for different folks. why not just wait it out instead of assuming the worst of everyone? I have to admit that's kind of disturbing, when you *could* just PM a mod with your concerns instead of chasing off possibly legitimate newbies. :o
LisaJaney *is* a Mod and I support her in this manner.

I've found that *legitimate* newbies don't ask these sorts of questions right off the bat. Or at all for that matter.

[Hue]

There is this odd sixth sense you get when you've been around for several years. (I know, not very scientific, but it is what it is.) I've never seen a moderator make a bad call, and I don't think I've seen any oldtimers bring up this topic erroneously, either. However, I come here off and on, so I could have missed things.

I have, however, seen a dozen solid calls that panned out as expected, even though I might not have been able to explain why in terms that would make sense to someone who hadn't been around a few years.

I know this is an unsatisfying post. I know I am not in a position to speak for the board, and I know it may not be reassuring to those who have expressed concerns. (Not reassuring at all! There is this mystic force that speaks to you when you've been here a long time in Super-Duper Sekret Wayyys *waggles fingers mysteriously).

But for what it's worth, that is what I've seen. From my perspective, anyone who is a newcomer with no untoward intent is highly unlikely to be stabbed in the eye with the pokey stick. Now as to why bring up the topic at all, well, I think there is some element of raising a concern to flag it for others, as well as perhaps some skills training or conscious-raising amongst the membership.

Again, I do not speak for the board, but that is my perspective and my best guess as to why things may look off to others, but there still isn't a general clamour for change.

[Hue]

An amendment:

Also, I have never seen LJ be wrong about anything.

(Dang, girl.)

[NebraskaChick84]

I know this is an unsatisfying post. I know I am not in a position to speak for the board, and I know it may not be reassuring to those who have expressed concerns. (Not reassuring at all! There is this mystic force that speaks to you when you've been here a long time in Super-Duper Sekret Wayyys *waggles fingers mysteriously).
oooooh Super-Duper sekret Wayyys! I get it now. thanks for explaining :)

[NebraskaChick84]

LisaJaney *is* a Mod and I support her in this manner.

I've found that *legitimate* newbies don't ask these sorts of questions right off the bat. Or at all for that matter.
the post I was refering to was made by Eboshi-who is not a mod. I didn't see a post made by LJ. I am aware that she is a mod. thanks.

[Hue]

Hang in there. I hear teleportation comes with the fifth year of participation.

I could use some of that.

;)

[Hue]

I think Eboshi was responding to LJ's "hmmm" post, which was the first of the heads-up comments.

[NebraskaChick84]

Hang in there. I hear teleportation comes with the fifth year of participation.

I could use some of that.

;)
me too...i've got 4y11m to go for that one LOL

ETA-didn't see that one sorry...I was just looking on the last page. sorry for the confusion (don't brand me a trouble maker k?) I probably *should* have read back to see the previous posts but with 3 little ones always needing my attention it's difficult to squeeze in my 3hrs of LHC and mostly then by skimming. *blushes* I am not a trouble maker I promise. I suffer foot in mouth disease that transmutes (worse if that's possible) to the keyboard.

[Hue]

Oh please, don't worry. Acting in good faith and with kind intent goes a long way, and I can't imagine someone would fault you for that.

I'm impressed you can do anything while caring for 3 children.

[NebraskaChick84]

Oh please, don't worry. Acting in good faith and with kind intent goes a long way, and I can't imagine someone would fault you for that.

I'm impressed you can do anything while caring for 3 children.
as am I. it helps that DH is currently unemployed. He takes care of referreeing and I take care of the mommy things.

I gotta admit living off of student loans isn't too much fun though.

[XeniaR]

LisaJaney *is* a Mod and I support her in this manner.

I've found that *legitimate* newbies don't ask these sorts of questions right off the bat. Or at all for that matter.

Oh, so that is how moderators treat people. I am an administrator of one site and a moderator for the largest Christian forum on the internet so I guess I have different standards for how moderators should treat newby's.

I rarely post, but now I guess I have figured out why.

[aprilmay]

I just swing it out of the way. DH doesn't like it in his face.

[Haith]

I sweep mine out of the way. I don't like it when either of us is sitting/lying on it so we've both gotten pretty good at taking it out of the way.

[Hue]

Oh, so that is how moderators treat people. I am an administrator of one site and a moderator for the largest Christian forum on the internet so I guess I have different standards for how moderators should treat newby's.

The looming and everpresent ****** issue may be one reason why the flavor of moderating is different here. It really is an almost daily issue in one way or another, and from what I hear, it takes up a majority of the moderating work time at this site.

Regardless, I'm sorry the place may not have felt welcome to you. I do hope that changes.

And welcome to LHC, if it hasn't yet been said. :flowers:

----

Edited to add in clarification:

There used to be much more open access to all areas of the board, including photographs. As member photos were found linked and posted on sites geared towards ******ism of long hair and, among other explicit things, descriptions of masturbation, the site gradually became less and less fully open to newcomers.

The moderators walk a fine line between maintaining a welcoming site and protecting the security of the membership, as well as the liability of those who own and run the site. It isn't perfect. There is no solid firewall. However, as the moderators have made their way along that line step-by-step, things have gotten better rather than continued to get worse. I'm glad for what they do, and I've long been impressed with the accuracy of their insights and decisions.

I imagine the size of the Christian forum you moderate presents its own challenges, likely far more than anyone from the outside would expect. It may be that unusually large or unusually focused sites will just tend to be more difficult to run than it appears from the outside, even if in different ways.

[Ms. Hollywood]

I just twist and put it out of his way or wear a loose pony-loop with a scrunchie (so it won't snag it). I braid it in pigtails sometimes...he likes that :p

[JamieLeigh]

I leave it be. ;) If it's up, it stays up...if it's down, I move it out of harm's way. LOL

[trolleypup]

It becomes less of an issue as it gets longer.

Now, speaking as a moderator:

Comments like LisaJaney's serve a dual purpose. First, they let people...the OP and others know that the moderators are around. Second, that type of comment serves as a heads up to members that there is a possibility that all is not as it seems on a thread...not everyone who comes here recognizes just how many people there are out on the internet (who can see everything on this board) whose interest in hair is not all noble and educational.

Another marker we notice is when a thread is started with a one way question, no further activity on the part of the original poster, rather than being a back and forth or discussion of a subject.

LHC is heavily moderated...this is not going to change...and yes, when we see certain behaviors, we become suspicious. We aren't going to apologize for that. If we are doing our jobs, mostly the members shouldn't see the stuff we are dealing with.

However, we aren't perfect, stuff will slip through, so be careful what you post (especially in the public areas of the board).

[Amoretti]

I for one am very grateful for the job the Mods are doing at protecting us.

We all have to remember this part of the board isn't private. I didn't post my anniversary thread with pictures here for that reason. Others may not have these concerns but I do.

Trust has to be earned, IMO. :flower:

[hippiechick1976]

I can say the year or so that I have been here I have seen some shady things. Some things I've pointed out to mods. They are here just trying to protect us from the crazies out there who have ******es with long hair etc. I know I don't want someone waltzing thru pics etc of any of US like it's a porn site. We are here for support, friendship, etc. I so appreciate the way they protect us...and they are usually right on about their instincts..hence why they have the role they do:)

[Amoretti]

Exactly. I have had experience with a hair stalker and it's not funny. Anyone rememebr "the Housewife"?:rolleyes:

[sandigirl]

I leave it long and loose--usually flowing down my back. I put it in a ponytail around the house the rest of the time. I have no "DH"--just a special friend.

[Fairlight63]

I am sorry that I offended so many!
I didn't mean anything by the question. It was just an honest question. I was just wondering what to do with my hair - that is all - honest! I am not a stalker or anything, LOL I am just a 63 yr. old grandmother that wants to grow her gray hair out long - nothing more.

[Bene]

I am sorry that I offended so many!
I didn't mean anything by the question. It was just an honest question. I was just wondering what to do with my hair - that is all - honest! I am not a stalker or anything, LOL I am just a 63 yr. old grandmother that wants to grow her gray hair out long - nothing more.


hahahahahahahaha i wasn't offended.



but kudos to you, getting your groove on at 63 :)

[goodluckcharm]

The looming and everpresent ****** issue may be one reason why the flavor of moderating is different here. It really is an almost daily issue in one way or another, and from what I hear, it takes up a majority of the moderating work time at this site.

Regardless, I'm sorry the place may not have felt welcome to you. I do hope that changes.

And welcome to LHC, if it hasn't yet been said. :flowers:

----

Edited to add in clarification:

There used to be much more open access to all areas of the board, including photographs. As member photos were found linked and posted on sites geared towards ******ism of long hair and, among other explicit things, descriptions of masturbation, the site gradually became less and less fully open to newcomers.

The moderators walk a fine line between maintaining a welcoming site and protecting the security of the membership, as well as the liability of those who own and run the site. It isn't perfect. There is no solid firewall. However, as the moderators have made their way along that line step-by-step, things have gotten better rather than continued to get worse. I'm glad for what they do, and I've long been impressed with the accuracy of their insights and decisions.

I imagine the size of the Christian forum you moderate presents its own challenges, likely far more than anyone from the outside would expect. It may be that unusually large or unusually focused sites will just tend to be more difficult to run than it appears from the outside, even if in different ways.
Thanks for the explanations! I am a newbie and was reading everything without comment, but was confused as to what infraction had been committed. I finally feel caught up, whew.

[XeniaR]

The looming and everpresent ****** issue may be one reason why the flavor of moderating is different here. It really is an almost daily issue in one way or another, and from what I hear, it takes up a majority of the moderating work time at this site.

Regardless, I'm sorry the place may not have felt welcome to you. I do hope that changes.

And welcome to LHC, if it hasn't yet been said. :flowers:

----

Edited to add in clarification:

There used to be much more open access to all areas of the board, including photographs. As member photos were found linked and posted on sites geared towards ******ism of long hair and, among other explicit things, descriptions of masturbation, the site gradually became less and less fully open to newcomers.

The moderators walk a fine line between maintaining a welcoming site and protecting the security of the membership, as well as the liability of those who own and run the site. It isn't perfect. There is no solid firewall. However, as the moderators have made their way along that line step-by-step, things have gotten better rather than continued to get worse. I'm glad for what they do, and I've long been impressed with the accuracy of their insights and decisions.

I imagine the size of the Christian forum you moderate presents its own challenges, likely far more than anyone from the outside would expect. It may be that unusually large or unusually focused sites will just tend to be more difficult to run than it appears from the outside, even if in different ways.

Christianforums has more then 10,000 new posts a day. We have far more trolls then the average site has from what I am told but that may also be due to its size.

I am staff in only one area of the forum, not the entire place. Daily I see 50 reported posts in my area alone (and that is just an estimate). Most of the reports are posts that brink the rules but don't fully break them, or for that matter, are reported posts that don't break the rules at all but other members don't like the content.

However, I assure you, I have delt with many sick posts.

But that is nothing comparied to what I have been doing for a living for the last several years. I have been providing treatment to Sexual Offenders. So, I am really familiar with ******es and to debraved behavior that comes from unchecked lusts.

Never the less, as an Administrator on another board that is just a little smaller then TLHC, I know the value we place on new members.

If a staff member of mine treated a newby like I saw here, volunteer or not they would be fired.

I don't tolerate rude behavior toward members. Period.

[Hue]

*mildly

It is a good thing, then, that there are moderators for this privately owned site who are comfortable with the standards and practices set by those who own and run LHC. Like most such private sites, it has its own flavor, and for those with different tastes, there is no requirement to stay.

I am more comfortable here than elsewhere, both now and as a newcomer; I can understand that others may have different preferences. I can understand it, and I can accept it without insulting others directly.

There is little I have seen on this thread that I would classify as rudeness.

[Calista]

Thank you, Hue! :flowers: You are not alone in thinking that way.

[Loviatar]

To the OP: I leave mine down, and then condition the heck out of it the next day.

Needless to say I condition a lot :D

[GlassEyes]

As opposed to the thread asking for pictures, this could be seen as a legitimate question, one that, as far as I'm aware of, hasn't been breached yet on TLHC. Sure, it may be a little odd for a first topic...actually, it's really odd for a first topic, but she did try to tone it down a bit, something that no obvious troll would do, and I think that, though it may be TMI, it is a question worth answering.

As for an answer to the question, I have nothing. XD;

[Kuchen]

It has been the subject of loads and loads of threads on this board and the old one – not that that means we can't have a fresh thread on the subject.

[morningstar]

XeniaR I have never seen rude behavior to newbies from our mods. In the two years I have been here I have seen the mods put out some fires that made this naive internet user wiser and more protective of myself and my friends I have made here. We all look out for each other and I am for sure thankful to those that keep the riff raff out and the ****** sniffing hounds out and about looking for those that would betray our trust.

I believe there is a sort of etiquette that a newbie should take. Don't ask me how I manage my hair as I cuddle with my partner if you don't know me and I don't know you. I mean, I wouldn't ask this to a stranger at a drug store buying shampoo. Trust needs to be formed when asking an intimate question.

[wintersun99]

um - nevermind...

wrong thread

[lora410]

I usally just fling it behind my back ;)

[Arriens]

Christianforums has more then 10,000 new posts a day. We have far more trolls then the average site has from what I am told but that may also be due to its size.Christianity is rather well spread and thus a quickly picked choice to troll. Also, my experiance (from other fora as well) is that the bigger the forum the more trolls there are.

I just go with how my hair was, low ponytail or just loose most of the times.

[Dianyla]

I believe there is a sort of etiquette that a newbie should take. Don't ask me how I manage my hair as I cuddle with my partner if you don't know me and I don't know you. I mean, I wouldn't ask this to a stranger at a drug store buying shampoo. Trust needs to be formed when asking an intimate question.
Thank you, you just hit the nail on the head. :agree:

[Niphredil]

Thank you, you just hit the nail on the head. :agree:
Ditto !

Just because you can't see the others in a discussion face to face, that doesn't mean you don't have to respect the privacy and personal space of that other. The anonymousness of the Internet makes some of us forget about that causing unintentionally awkward remarks/questions. And then there are some that use this anonymousness to place such remarks intentionally, and those are the one the mods and long(er) time users try to expose.

[serabelle]

Sigh - my hair isn't long enough for it to get in the way yet.

And to the people arguing on here, I mean this in the most respectful of ways:

Give it a rest perhaps? If you really have a problem with the, PM a mod. There has been a lot of nitpicking about post appropriateness here lately, and it's sort of disappointing. If you don't like the post, don't post! If you have a problem with it, talk to a mod! Please don't take it out on potential new members who are asking legitimate (if personal) questions.

[Christina]

It depends...on certain things...physical locations and whatnot. :eyebrows:
Either down or sort of shoved up above my head. And if he tangles it, then he can darn well UNtangle it...:D

[SolSara]

It depends...on certain things...physical locations and whatnot. :eyebrows:
Either down or sort of shoved up above my head. And if he tangles it, then he can darn well UNtangle it...:D

That is my rule too. :D I just let it be whatever style it is. If there is a stick involved or it becomes to uncomfortable, I take a second and take it down. But if it is very tangled afterwards, I just reach him the comb and smile. :D

The only thing I won't do is lay on the back with damp, loose hair. Then no comb or detangling spray in the world can save it from snaps. Not said you still can't have fun. :eyebrows:

As for the discussion. Personal or not, you don't HAVE to answer any question. I love the internet because of the possibilities. You can do whatever you want and ask all those questions and get a lot of answers you'd never get IRL. It's not anonymous, so you should never write anything on the board that you don't want your mother or daughter or boss to read, but most people here you will never meet in real life and if you do, you already know a bit about each other. :)

The mods are doing a great job though; I very rarely come across any inappropriate post and all the rules to become a full member hopefully serves its purpose too.

[Kiraela]

Mine is almost always down - we both like the feel of hair on skin, so it all works out. I can then have an excuse to get him to comb it for me, too!

[Myrrh]

My hubby just usually moves it out of the way. He learned after a few elbows to the ribs when he would yank it by not paying attention :D

[MadPirateBippy]

Oh, so that is how moderators treat people. I am an administrator of one site and a moderator for the largest Christian forum on the internet so I guess I have different standards for how moderators should treat newby's.

I rarely post, but now I guess I have figured out why.

Most Christian forums don't end up with people who coast around the site asking for pictures of women in modest clothing praying. Or have the problems that we have seen here before and will probably see here again. Some of the members on this site are minors, and the moderators do a FANTASTIC job at keeping everyone safe, especially since there are people on the internet who try to target some of the women on this forum.

With my experience in another line of work, I can tell you that the first post on this thread sent up red flags in my head, as well. Religious forums, especially those of a dominant religion, have a different kind of troll.

If the original poster was a "gentleman" who was trying to get visual images for titillation, the moderator based discussion around why this is a... attention-getting topic for the moderators will probably dampen his ardor. If the poster was simply an innocent newbie asking an innocent question (I give this a 25% chance), then she now knows, in a fairly friendly way, what the limits of the culture are because she started to push against them.

I agree with everything the mods have said, and I also want to state that this is quite possibly the friendliest forum I have been on, ever, and I've been a heavy user of the internet since I was a wee bairn- well over 15 years of obsessive forum use, I am probably moderately active on over a dozen right now (don't look at me that way, some of them are professional). :cheese:

[alkaliberry]

If I have a hair stick or a fork in the that's usually removed and my hair is then down and if it's in a pony tail dh usually undos that, he likes my hair down at 'cuddle time'. There have been occasions when he has leant on it and pulled it then I just squeak and he moves pretty sharpish. He never helps me untangle if he knots it up.... I like the 'if you knot it you untangle it bit, I might ask him to do that now!

[sissadawn]

Well I've learned quite a bit from this thread, I always wondered why you start out blocked from some things and have to build up posts. I feel a bit slow now that I see why :rolleyes:.

[atlantaz3]

He has needed a little training. I have to remind him not to wear his watch to bed - my hair seems to want to get caught in it. As my hair has gotten longer he has realize how important it is to me and is respectful - not the word I want. He just seems to look out so he's not laying on it or strangling me! Mine starts out over the pillow and then goes where ever. I thought about a sleep cap and may try it for the nights he works late.

[Fairlight63]

I bought a sleepcap, but I look like such a geek in it that I haven't been brave enough to wear it yet. I think that DH would laugh himself silly, LOL
What I have been doing is putting my hair up in a bun on top of my head, that is the most comfortable for sleeping for me, I think. But it probably isn't healthy to have hair in a bun all of the time. Especially since my hair is kind of thin on top!
Sometimes I will get up in the middle of the night & put on the sleepcap when DH is asleep, but I don't think that the cap is very comfortable to sleep in, it keeps trying to slip down over my eyes.

[suicides_eve]

Exactly. I have had experience with a hair stalker and it's not funny. Anyone remember "the Housewife"?:rolleyes:

I've been here about 2 years and don't remember that particular one but you cam pm me with the story if you would like, sounds like it could be interesting:drama:.

as for the answer to the op questioin: it's usually under a plastic bag full of conditioner stuffed under a do-rag:cheese::D

[fae]

Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

[irishcurls]

Maybe if you try a night cap I know that is totally a mood killer but it would help with tangles.

[coppercurls]

;)Braids are this girls best friend.

[redcelticcurls]

Aside from not being on the bottom, well, I'm not sure what else to say without breaking the PG-13 rule!

[spidermom]

I like a high ponytail. They slide down, but my hair tangles far less with this. A braid is good, too, but I don't go to bed with a braid very often; I can't sleep in them.

[irishcurls]

redcelticcurls is right. You could try different "placements of your hair" ie: not the bottom. You said its the small hairs on your next that you cant braid so that should solve it.

[twilight_faerie]

I agree with spidermom; a high ponytail works well when you're careful not to lay on it. I usually position the tail on the bed above my head.

[RancheroTheBee]

Hmm. I'll presume you're in the less... assertive position. Do you have silk pillowcases?

Also, and this will probably get deleted, but I'm willing to help a gal out anyhow. Try rear-entry, and wear your hair up. No tangles, and you won't end up pinned to the bed by your hair.

[ericthegreat]

Okayyyyyyyyy *trying to keep this as family friendly as possible*

But intimate time is definitely NOT the time to be worried about your hair. What I really find attractive is the type of guy (yes this principle is true for both gay couples and straight couples) who doesn't spend a hour tidying up his hair or checking out his own body in the mirror while in the process of love making. What is really sexy is a guy/or a gal who is totally secure about themselves, they are completely confident about their bodies and their own personality that they don't care if their hair gets all messed up. I know I don't! :p

I actually love to have my hair down personally especially when I'm intimate with a guy I like. And I've had plenty of convos with straight guy friends who definitely agree that they prefer that their girl have her hair long and down when they are intimate. A woman with her hair down is free and uninhibited. Worry about the tangles and knots later in the shower when you've slathered a whole ton of conditioner and or coconut oil into your hair, and just let loose and enjoy!;)

[Cherry_Sprinkle]

I spread my hair out so its out on the pillow from under my neck.. that helps quite a bit.. I am afraid my husband would laugh himself to death if I paraded around the bedroom in my silk sleeping cap for those not sleepy times :lol:

[redcelticcurls]

I was going to go with Ranchero's suggestion. ;)

[Themyst]

I always get pinned by my hair. I just deal with it since the benefits most definitely outweigh the temporary inconvenience. :gabigrin: It's sexiest when it's down.

[trolleypup]

Please remember that everyone on the internet can see anything you post on the Mane Board...

[fae]

Ok. Thanks for the replies.

I'm deleting the original post.

[Nat242]

Just so you know, there have been a number of threads on this topic before. Maybe you can search for some answers in those?

[Willow]

I have had a lot of issues with tangling at the nape (unrelated to intimate activity) and I have found that Johnson's detangler for children works wonders at keeping it untangled. I used to have to fight for 20 minutes in the shower to detangle it! I just spray this on wet hair just in the nape area and down the underside of the length. It does have cones in it but I figure this is better for my hair than damaging it by fighting tangles out all the time. Maybe give it a try?

[Smokie]

I've rarely had huge problems with tangles during/because of those intimate moments... Granted my hair hardly qualifies as long yet. Perhaps it's all the hair pulling I tend to encourage... :ponder:

My problem tends to arise more during sleeping. My hair goes nuts when I share a bed. I'm a very cuddly sleeper so even with satin sheets and pillowcases I tend to wake up with dry tangly awful hair no matter the style I tried for the night. Not fun. Not sure I'll ever be able to bring myself to wear my sleepcap thinger to bed with someone else around either... Any ideas?

[vindo]

I learned how to move with my hair down and can keep it out of the way without thinking about it by now :)

[Moonstruck]

Hahaha, I've wondered about the same thing so many times. I tend to just loosely LOOSELY braid it and toss it over my shoulder - my hair sorta unravels really quicky, but bits of it are still together and therefore it stays put (vaguely). So essentially, your hair will be lying on your chest but hair doesn't really block much so its fine. If it's long enough to go past the butt, I just let it trail off the bed, haha.
I actually used to find it the most... annoying, when positions are reversed, simply because my hair was long enough to get in the way or tickle at that point. Putting it in a bun/braid at that point just seems silly, no?

I'm guessing at what this thread is about, so forgive me if something not pertinent is said.

[JamieLeigh]

I think I can guess what the question was, LOL. ;) Pigtails or pigtail braids - they're hot and they keep everything out of the way.

[Susana]

I just move the hair around depending of the position. Generally I'll just throw my hair over my one shoulder. Tangles happen but I just don't think of it at the start.

[adiapalic]

Aww, there's nothing wrong with being genuinely curious about different ways of securing hair during intimate moments! :D Mine is usually braided--sometimes gets tangled when it's down, but if I keep it out of the way on a pillow when laying down, it's usually not so tangly.

[Maddy25]

Hi, Im not really sure if this is acceptable to post at LHC but I find it is one problem I cannot really avoid and I am only shoulder length, I couldnt imagine what it much be like with those of you with longer hair! And out of all things, I find it is the most damaging thing to my hair....

This topic actually makes me blush a lot but it would be hair and love making :oops: I find no matter what I do my hair becomes incredibly matted and messy in the back and combing it through is terrible and pretty much impossible because it gets so bad I sort of just have to rip it. Its very annoying and I was just wondering if anyone else had this problem and if there was any style or something that may prevent this but still look, you know, sexy?

[BlackfootHair]

This has been discussed in the past, and I think the mods said as long as it didn't get too detailed and was kept pg-13, it was fine. But don't quote me on that.

For me personally, I have a satin pillowcase, so when we are in the midst of things, I don't really have to worry about that side of my head. (although sometimes....well, lets just say more often than not I didn't have to worry about the rest of the pillows. lol)

As for any other position that would leave the hair to fly freely, sometimes I have it pulled back in a ponytail, or other times I just let it fly. And I have to say, as a curly girl, sometimes my hair has looked better and more curly after, than before. I guess curls like to bounce? LOL :) (I hope that comment doesn't get me in trouble.)

[BlackfootHair]

Oh, and for the tangling bit, I find cones or oils work lovely to keep hair from tangling so much, regardless of the reason they tangled. :)

[nowxisxforever]

My hair will get pretty tangly sometimes, but only if my head is against the pillow, if you catch my drift-- most of what we do ends up with me mostly upright, or at least with my head not *rubbing* on anything.

My hair's just to that length where you really have to be careful what you leave it down during...... so I twist it up in a knot (my youtube video somewhere shows it-- I'm not at home so I can't access YouTube, but check out KillingNostalgia on YouTube, it's the #2 hair video... second style) without fully pulling the tail through, so it doesn't hang down quite so bad. It doesn't require any pins so if it falls out or if I find myself in a rubby position, it's not uncomfortable and just takes a second to take out.

If I am laying down, I do the same thing I do for bed-- flip my hair out up over my pillow and/or over the side of the bed. It'll tangle up the bottom by my neck, but not much more.

[nowxisxforever]

Also! A suggestion-- at shoulder you should be able to do shortie braids- why don't you do pigtails before you go to have fun, or anytime you might find yourself having fun? Not unattractive like some alternative styles, and still at least keeps the loose hair to a minimum.

[jahof45]

I started moving it out of the way from APL on and my DH helps move it so he doesn't lay on it either.

[WhitsEnd]

For the most part I just flip my hair over my shoulder. I do not want to be too descriptive,,,its hard to explain what I do without 'telling what we do'.

[InTheCity]

Even as I'm barely BSL, I've been noticing this problem a lot lately. Fortunately Mr. Perfect lays my head on my satin pillow case if that's the "way" the session is at any given moment.

My worst issues have come from being "attacked" right out of the shower after a wash. Letting hair air dry while you're having fun means big frizzy puff ball head. (And if it starts in the shower... hair is toast! :eyebrows:)

I'm definitely glad someone asked this, I was thinking about it yesterday.

Oh and I also second those folks who've mentioned standing, sitting, somewhere else, etc. Hair then isn't a problem.

[PaleDale]

I have this problem where nearly every position I try my girlfriend ends up with it all over her face (my hair that is). I tried doing a "Robert Trujilo" and made a long pony tail with like 10 elastics spaced out then I nearly whipped her eye out with it! :|

[Medievalmaniac]

hmmmm.....not to be too immodest here, but I think you are going to have to take the upper hand on this, if you catch my drift....! That's the best way I can think of, if you want to wear it down and not have it totally wrecked. He might not complain too much, either! ;)

[PaleDale]

I am the He :(

[Medievalmaniac]

well, then strike that...reverse it! ;) You'd let her have the upper hand...

[PaleDale]

well, then strike that...reverse it! ;) You'd let her have the upper hand...


Well no, because then her long hair is all over my face.. Lucky for me I like the smell of Henna though :) hahah!

[Tanuki]

Makes me glad my goal is just the nape of my neck. I can just slick that back and a few banana clips keep hair out of my eyes. I don't care how "gay" :rolleyes: my relatives say it is on guys. Banana clips rock out loud

[GlennaGirl]

I take mine off.

Just kidding.

[GlennaGirl]

I have this problem where nearly every position I try my girlfriend ends up with it all over her face (my hair that is). I tried doing a "Robert Trujilo" and made a long pony tail with like 10 elastics spaced out then I nearly whipped her eye out with it! :|

Good lord, I am NOT even going to ask how all this is happening. :confused:

Maybe I'm just...old. Or non-acrobatic.

[GlennaGirl]

Wait. I have the solution. Why not just wear it all up inside a hat?

[Tanuki]

...I don't think so Tim

[PaleDale]

Wait. I have the solution. Why not just wear it all up inside a hat?

The only hat I have is a novelty court jester one.. I'd look hideous and I'm sure the last thing she wants is baubles bouncing off her face! :|

[Themyst]

Wait. I have the solution. Why not just wear it all up inside a hat?

Ooohh! Or maybe a shower or sleep cap! Hey, that might also solve the world's over population problem, too! :rollin:

[Tanuki]

She'd be too busy laughing to ever get the job done?

[PaleDale]

She'd be too busy laughing to ever get the job done?

No, that has NOTHING to do with the hat :P

[RoseRedDead]

You know, this whole thread kind of makes me happy I don't have an SO. :P

[Tanuki]

Well, ladies to say they like a man that can make them laugh

[GlennaGirl]

The only hat I have is a novelty court jester one.. I'd look hideous and I'm sure the last thing she wants is baubles bouncing off her face! :|

You never know. May add that little "extra something" to the whole act. Maybe she has a thing for clowns. I say...go for it!

The alternative, of course, is to go to WalMart and sacrifice a whole $3.50 or whatever on a hat in the Clearance bin of Men's.

Or............a simple ponytail only half-pulled out for the last loop.

[PaleDale]

Well, ladies to say they like a man that can make them laugh

Well she always laughs when I go to lift my head up and I don't realise I have my hair pinned down under my hand and nearly scalp myself :(

[GlennaGirl]

Ooohh! Or maybe a shower or sleep cap! Hey, that might also solve the world's over population problem, too! :rollin:

Bingo!!!! A shower cap (http://cache3.asset-cache.net/xc/200189199-001.jpg?v=1&c=NewsMaker&k=2&d=E35B54D5385E960E0CD5E6DB8C693FC51F6F6178A68B340C ). And it's Themyst FTW!!

[PaleDale]

You never know. May add that little "extra something" to the whole act. Maybe she has a thing for clowns. I say...go for it!

The alternative, of course, is to go to WalMart and sacrifice a whole $3.50 or whatever on a hat in the Clearance bin of Men's.

Or............a simple ponytail only half-pulled out for the last loop.

Good advice, thank you. Thing is no matter what I do the ponytail always comes loose!

[GlennaGirl]

Or a swim cap (http://cache1.asset-cache.net/xc/10147294.jpg?v=1&c=NewsMaker&k=2&d=20052D8979D544DBD9CC9CB99DB6D648E30A760B0D811297 ).

[Tanuki]

It is to laugh! But seriously, ow. But I laugh despite it!

[Themyst]

Bingo!!!! A shower cap (http://cache3.asset-cache.net/xc/200189199-001.jpg?v=1&c=NewsMaker&k=2&d=E35B54D5385E960E0CD5E6DB8C693FC51F6F6178A68B340C ). And it's Themyst FTW!!

I'm so happy I didn't have a mouthful of tea or soda or something when I clicked on that link ...

[Tanuki]

As do I. Metaphysically, you'd be spitting in our faces and I think I would like to put off my shower to just before I go to bed, thank you very much.

[Kiraela]

Good lord, I am NOT even going to ask how all this is happening. :confused:

Maybe I'm just...old. Or non-acrobatic.


The last few pages of this thread have made me giggle like nobody's business.. Especially this one... The voice I hear it in, in my head... bwahaha.

And the showercap link doesn't work for me... Probably for the best, apparently!

[rexy]

My hair gets tangled no matter what if my head is on the pillow. Especially at the nape of my neck. I started using my silk head wrap, which is probably very unsexy but hey it works.

[Fethenwen]

Hey man, wait! I'm just gonna put on my hairprotective hat first!

Now THAT is something my bf sure would take as a sign that my hair obsession have gone too far :laugh:

Well, so far I'm not to bothered about my hair in those situations, will be interesting when it get so long that it maybe could be a problem in bed.

[eadwine]

A woman with her hair down is free and uninhibited.
Not really. Quite the generalization there Eric ;) I am free and uninhibited with it up as well. :cheese:


Caps??? Ehhh.. :rolling:

[PaleDale]

The last few pages of this thread have made me giggle like nobody's business.. Especially this one... The voice I hear it in, in my head... bwahaha.

And the showercap link doesn't work for me... Probably for the best, apparently!

Yes, this has turned into the best hair thread ever haha!

[BunnyBee]

I think the silk pillowcase works best :) Makes a big difference. Now if only I could afford to get the whole bed kitted out in silk! lol :cheese:

[PaleDale]

I think the silk pillowcase works best :) Makes a big difference. Now if only I could afford to get the whole bed kitted out in silk! lol :cheese:
Silk pillowcase? You usually put a paper bag over my head!!!!

[Themis]

The looming and everpresent ****** issue may be one reason why the flavor of moderating is different here. It really is an almost daily issue in one way or another, and from what I hear, it takes up a majority of the moderating work time at this site.

Regardless, I'm sorry the place may not have felt welcome to you. I do hope that changes.

And welcome to LHC, if it hasn't yet been said. :flowers:

----

Edited to add in clarification:

There used to be much more open access to all areas of the board, including photographs. As member photos were found linked and posted on sites geared towards ******ism of long hair and, among other explicit things, descriptions of masturbation, the site gradually became less and less fully open to newcomers.

The moderators walk a fine line between maintaining a welcoming site and protecting the security of the membership, as well as the liability of those who own and run the site. It isn't perfect. There is no solid firewall. However, as the moderators have made their way along that line step-by-step, things have gotten better rather than continued to get worse. I'm glad for what they do, and I've long been impressed with the accuracy of their insights and decisions.

I couldn't find a smilie that looked like the lightbulb-above-my-head expression of dawning realization on my face, so I'll just say, "Oooohhh...!"

I was rather mystified by the all the seemingly bizarre newbie rules here (and frustrated that I can't see many of the pictures, which are often helpful in terms of instruction), but I just figured everything would be revealed in time. The above quote really clarified the issues pertaining to those rules for me.

I belong to a number of natural living forums, and I viewed joing the LHC as an extension of that interest. It had never occurred to me that this would be a prime Internet stalking ground, because most of my other online communities concern nutrition and household products and pet food (and if anything is anti-sexy, it's a rousing discussion focusing on the scent of green tripe). This is the first "appearance-based"* group to which I've belonged, and the repercussions of that weren't immediately clear to me.

To answer the original question (which I thought was valid and interesting), I find pigtails - whether high on the head or low on the sides, loose or braided - to be the most convenient and comfortable if I'm going to be moving around a lot or lying on my back for an extended period of time. I also think they look cute and sexy.

A very high ponytail can also be comfortable in a variety of positions and looks a bit more polished, but I find that it tends to slip out and get tangled at the nape much moreso than pigtails.

*Please note that I am not suggesting that the members here are concerned soley with their appearances or that there are not other reasons to belong here. I just mean that long hair is a physical attribute and part of one's appearance.

[Tanuki]

Please stop trying to cover yourself. You're going to:foot: and that's not sexy at all. Trust me, I have experience in the matter. Just chill out, enjoy your stay and keep posting

[GlennaGirl]

I believe there is a sort of etiquette that a newbie should take. Don't ask me how I manage my hair as I cuddle with my partner if you don't know me and I don't know you. I mean, I wouldn't ask this to a stranger at a drug store buying shampoo. Trust needs to be formed when asking an intimate question.

Huh...teach ME to read all through a thread before posting! You know, this is very true. (I know a few people have already agreed, but I thought I'd put in my four ha'pennies.) We do tend to forget social etiquette entirely when we're on the interwebs.

I mean you wouldn't walk into a party, introduce yourself, and say, "I see you have long hair too! Hey, what do you do with it during s * x? This is a question that's been plaguing me. PLEASE help."

People seem to open up a lot more (maybe sometimes too much) without having gone through the standard social steps on the internet than in real life. And even though mores can be silly, some are put in place for a reason. In this matter it's probably self-protection. When someone is too way-open with you IRL the very first time you meet, it can feel very creepy. On the internet, though, people just "let fly".

I let fly in this thread having known quite a few posters involved in it for some time, but some of my answers were to newbies, so...sorry about that. Regardless, the OP has a few more posts by now, so maybe things are different...

[Tanuki]

Well, in a place like this you can just put up a question and let anyone who wants to answer it without the pretense of sizing a person up and seeing if they'll think it's strange or not. A person can just let something plaguing them out with the hope of someone reciprocating. I just got through reading the rape thread (I was looking for a drunk thread and somehow that got into the search) and I don't think any of those poor persons could have managed to share that in any forum involving live interaction

[florenonite]

Well, in a place like this you can just put up a question and let anyone who wants to answer it without the pretense of sizing a person up and seeing if they'll think it's strange or not. A person can just let something plaguing them out with the hope of someone reciprocating.

I think this is a valid point. To me, going up to someone you've just met and asking them what they do with their hair for s*x is more like PMing a random member here with particularly long hair and asking them, without having had any previous interaction with them. On the contrary, an thread like this allows people who want to answer it the chance to do so and doesn't place anyone under a feeling of obligation to answer it if they don't, as asking a particular person might.

There's also a degree of anonymity on the internet that you don't get IRL, and therefore it makes it easier to discuss things that are socially awkward or taboo.

Essentially, when I first saw this thread (ETA: This seems to be a conglomeration of threads on the same topic, so the one I was talking about here seems to be somewhere in the middle. I'm pretty certain I'm thinking of the same one as those who talked of newbies asking personal questions, though END ETA) I thought "this looks f*tishy" because it was a newbie, but when it was established that it wasn't I didn't really find anything odd about it. It was a conundrum many of us face about which she asked, and one that has been asked before, so to me it doesn't really matter if it's an established member or not asking it due to the fact that it's open to all of us to answer or not answer as we so choose, along with the anonymity of the internet.

[oogie]

Uhm date check isle one.

[Tanuki]

I like the anonymity of the internet. It lets me vent. I'm polite 6 hours a day. I need to let some evil out occasionally