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Annibelle
March 18th, 2012, 02:42 PM
I see a lot on the forum about people saying the people around them IRL could benefit from LHC tips, that their hair is fried or short or split.

Am I the only one who sees the opposite in my own life?

The college girls around me have MAGNIFICENT hair. I'm really envious of so many girls I see every day on campus. Most girls I see have WL hair that's either very healthy and clumpy-wavy (like from plopping), or really shiny and straight... and I don't think most of them have unhealthy-hair-disguised-as-healthy. It really looks great, even up close. It's not rare at all to see girls here with healthy HL hair, either.

Sometimes I just feel like I'm doing something wrong. Here I am trying to be natural and gentle with my hair... and I come to school as a frizz-head each day, and they come to school looking glamorous! :p I mean, maybe they're doing LHC-type things, too... but maybe they're just using great conventional products, or maybe they just have good hair genes. Sometimes I think I oughta just go back to conventional products, etc., but then I remember that my hair definitely looked and felt worse then. It seems like my hair is improving all the time, but it's still no where near as nice as the hair I see at school every day. (Or here, obviously. ;) ) I just feel a bit frustrated and silly. It's like I'm the only one around here TRYING to have great hair... and, in comparison to theirs, I'm the only one failing! GAH! (And I'm definitely not saying this to inspire unnecessary compliments. I'm just trying to let you all understand how I feel. :) )

Anyone else experience this, too? Do you see LHC-worthy hair IRL daily?

RapunzelKat
March 18th, 2012, 02:52 PM
I would say it varies ;) I see plenty of people who could seriously use some LHC hair help, and I see plenty of people with healthy, beautiful hair (there is one lady where I work with THICK silver and white, BSL hair that is in perfect, perfect condition. I :thud: every time I see it!) I do think some people are just lucky and have sturdy hair that is easy to care for. Also, it is possible to have really nice hair with conventional products, if you can find ones that work for your individual head. I use a lot of conventional products still, and my hair generally looks pretty good I think :)

Also, I do think most of us see our hair in a more negative light than others do... The other day I was wearing a braided bun that I was sure was crooked and had all sorts of loose hairs sticking out, but I got compliments on it! Maybe this is the case for you to some degree? From your sig pic an avatar, your hair looks lovely! (I know you weren't fishing for compliments here, but it really does :D)

Annibelle
March 18th, 2012, 02:56 PM
I would say it varies ;) I see plenty of people who could seriously use some LHC hair help, and I see plenty of people with healthy, beautiful hair (there is one lady where I work with THICK silver and white, BSL hair that is in perfect, perfect condition. I :thud: every time I see it!) I do think some people are just lucky and have sturdy hair that is easy to care for. Also, it is possible to have really nice hair with conventional products, if you can find ones that work for your individual head. I use a lot of conventional products still, and my hair generally looks pretty good I think :)

Also, I do think most of us see our hair in a more negative light than others do... The other day I was wearing a braided bun that I was sure was crooked and had all sorts of loose hairs sticking out, but I got compliments on it! Maybe this is the case for you to some degree? From your sig pic an avatar, your hair looks lovely! (I know you weren't fishing for compliments here, but it really does :D)

I think you're right... there are a lot of LHC people who use conventional products, too, and their hair is amazing. I guess what annoys me is that I think these girls just spend NO time on their hair and then look amazing!!! Of course, I have no idea if that's actually the case. ;)

(And thanks for the compliment! But my photos are tricky-- they don't show all the fuzzy hairs sticking up all over my head! :o I'd be so happy with my hair if it looked, IRL, like it does on camera.)

Sillage
March 18th, 2012, 03:02 PM
A girl I work with has stick straight dark chocolate hair. Always looks perfect. She flat irons it every day but has no damage. I'd hate her for it but she's a wonderful person and a terrific co-worker. LOL :D

Annibelle
March 18th, 2012, 03:06 PM
A girl I work with has stick straight dark chocolate hair. Always looks perfect. She flat irons it every day but has no damage. I'd hate her for it but she's a wonderful person and a terrific co-worker. LOL :D

YES! I see hair like that all the time. I'm quite envious, and I might be mad at those girls if I weren't too busy wondering how they keep their hair so perfect. :p I'm often tempted to ask, but the girls at my school tend to be very snobby and I'm afraid of them saying something either unhelpful or mean. :o

cwarren
March 18th, 2012, 03:10 PM
I try my best not be jealous of some of my friend's hair, but OMG! I know I have very porous, difficult hair, but two of my friends wash and blowdry their hair EVERY DAY. I wish! They sleep on cotton sheets without protecting their hair, use the bushes with the plastic balls at the end and use cheap shampoos. When I mention what I do with my hair they give me questioning looks and I try to keep the conversation limited so I don't sound crazy. One has waist length hair and the other is BSL. They get away with all kinds of abuse I'd never imagine for my hair and they don't have a single split end...

spidermom
March 18th, 2012, 03:14 PM
A lot of the women that I see do have good-looking hair, but in a different way. For example, my DD keeps her hair between shoulder and APL, layered, colored. She curls it or flat irons it just about every day, but she keeps the ends cut regularly, so the damage she might be causing doesn't show.

Carrie Ingalls
March 18th, 2012, 03:16 PM
I see people that have hair that could really use some TLC and other people who seem to have the stunning always "perfect" hair like you have mentioned. I think the key is that we tend to be more critical of our own hair. For example I know that their are some splits and damage in my hair (especially the longer parts from before I started to really pay attention and take better care of my hair), but other people don't see that. They usually are not looking that closely. The other thing that I have to remind my self is that I prefer natural hair looking hair (I do still use cones) and that means it will not always (or even frequently/or ever) look like a magazine. Also, other people don't know what my hair is "supposed to look like" and they don't mind the flyaways or notice them as much as I do. We can't really compare different hair types very well because they behave soo differently.

Like RapunzelKat said, many have been the days I felt like my hair was a mess or really frizzy and I still got compliments on it.

Annibelle
March 18th, 2012, 03:17 PM
I try my best not be jealous of some of my friend's hair, but OMG! I know I have very porous, difficult hair, but two of my friends wash and blowdry their hair EVERY DAY. I wish! They sleep on cotton sheets without protecting their hair, use the bushes with the plastic balls at the end and use cheap shampoos. When I mention what I do with my hair they give me questioning looks and I try to keep the conversation limited so I don't sound crazy. One has waist length hair and the other is BSL. They get away with all kinds of abuse I'd never imagine for my hair and they don't have a single split end...

Ohhh I know how you feel about sharing your routine. I have a friend with super thick, coarse, blond hair that she straightens and blowdries and dyes and bleaches... I noticed one day that she was straightening her 2-year-old daughter's ringlets that have the potential to be GORGEOUS if they were taken care of like curly hair, and I gave my friend some tips on how to deal with curly hair... but I felt really embarrassed because she looked at my hair and I could tell she was thinking, "Yeah, like I'm supposed to take hair advice with someone with hair THAT thin!?" :o She then insisted that straightening and blow-drying are healthy for hair, and that mine would look so much better and be so much stronger if I did those things. I disagreed, but I couldn't really argue because my hair's no model of perfection. :o

Miss Catrina
March 18th, 2012, 03:25 PM
Ohhh I know how you feel about sharing your routine. I have a friend with super thick, coarse, blond hair that she straightens and blowdries and dyes and bleaches... I noticed one day that she was straightening her 2-year-old daughter's ringlets that have the potential to be GORGEOUS if they were taken care of like curly hair, and I gave my friend some tips on how to deal with curly hair... but I felt really embarrassed because she looked at my hair and I could tell she was thinking, "Yeah, like I'm supposed to take hair advice with someone with hair THAT thin!?" :o She then insisted that straightening and blow-drying are healthy for hair, and that mine would look so much better and be so much stronger if I did those things. I disagreed, but I couldn't really argue because my hair's no model of perfection. :o

I am horrified that she was straightening a two year old's hair. :eek:

Annibelle
March 18th, 2012, 03:28 PM
I am horrified that she was straightening a two year old's hair. :eek:

Yeah. :( She insists that her daughter's hair is just too curly and "frizzy" to deal with without straightening. She has the same hair type and hates it. They both could have incredibly beautiful curls if they didn't brush so furiously or straighten, but no one ever listens to me. ;) I directed her to naturallycurly and LHC, but she sort of brushed it off. :(

jacqueline101
March 18th, 2012, 03:29 PM
The women I see have short to medium length hair. The condition varies.

DaniVerde
March 18th, 2012, 03:31 PM
A girl I work with has stick straight dark chocolate hair. Always looks perfect. She flat irons it every day but has no damage. I'd hate her for it but she's a wonderful person and a terrific co-worker. LOL :D

You're a better person than I...I hate her and I don't know her :D

Moominmamma
March 18th, 2012, 03:49 PM
I guess that would be my immediate family, so the answer is not everyone, but nearly everyone. My husband has very little hair left, and his approach to haircare is quite perfunctory, wash once a week with whatever is available :D

But the two sons we have left at home have fabulous hair. Ds2 has fine poker straight jet black hair in naturally great condition, ds3 has dark red brown wavy hair, a bit like a human red setter.....my hair used to be shiny like the boys, it's not so good at the moment, I regret getting highlights for my birthday last year, chemical colouring doesn't seem to suit my hair.

Othala
March 18th, 2012, 03:56 PM
Nope - I am surrounded by women with short, chemically-dyed and/or permed, blow-fried hair.

HintOfMint
March 18th, 2012, 03:58 PM
I understand this feeling all too well, and in more than the realm of hair. It would be a long spiel, so I'll just focus on the topic at hand.

Is it possible that you're focusing on very different hairtypes from your own? Their hair could be coarser and thicker which is just a matter of genetics unless one is suffering from malnutrition. I notice that your hair type is F/M ii and that is going to be a bit different from thick, coarse wavy hair and pin straight hair. On the pessimistic side, no your hair is not going to look like that, not easily anyway. But on the positive side, it's not even a comparison. It's apples and oranges. I'm Indian and if I tried to compare my dark features to an ultra blonde Swedish girl, that would be nuts!:p
Maybe it's a matter of embracing what you have, instead of wishing for something else. It is easier said than done, I know.

All the Indian girls I know straighten their hair and it is so tempting to do what they do because it looks perfect all the time and up close, too! But I know from personal experience that my hair doesn't respond to frequent heat well. If they have more resilient hair, more power to them. But it is not an option for me, so I have to make do.

On the flipside, you said you do a natural and more gentle routine. Gentleness is always good (yay for not clarifying daily!), but natural products aren't necessarily better than conventional products. If you're abstaining for environmental/moral reasons, then that's fine, but if you are just looking for the better product for your hair, maybe expanding your horizons is a possibility. I looked at your albums, and I see the "pantene" picture and your hair looks lovely! It's hard to compare it to the post-LHC pictures as the lighting is very different. But is it possible that maybe the new natural routine makes you psychologically feel so good that you are seeing your hair as improved?

Whatever you decide to do, if you do decide to rethink your routine, do it with your own improvement in mind and not comparisons with others


So stay focused on you and enjoy your hair. PS. that wavy, voluminous thing your hair does in the front is really beautiful! I ask for hair like that on the rare instances I go to the salon.

Amber_Maiden
March 18th, 2012, 04:14 PM
I see more bad hair- definitely- then good healthy hair... :(

Sillage
March 18th, 2012, 04:15 PM
You're a better person than I...I hate her and I don't know her :D

:laugh: you are too much!

Annibelle
March 18th, 2012, 04:19 PM
I understand this feeling all too well, and in more than the realm of hair. It would be a long spiel, so I'll just focus on the topic at hand.

Is it possible that you're focusing on very different hairtypes from your own? Their hair could be coarser and thicker which is just a matter of genetics unless one is suffering from malnutrition. I notice that your hair type is F/M ii and that is going to be a bit different from thick, coarse wavy hair and pin straight hair. On the pessimistic side, no your hair is not going to look like that, not easily anyway. But on the positive side, it's not even a comparison. It's apples and oranges. I'm Indian and if I tried to compare my dark features to an ultra blonde Swedish girl, that would be nuts!:p
Maybe it's a matter of embracing what you have, instead of wishing for something else. It is easier said than done, I know.

All the Indian girls I know straighten their hair and it is so tempting to do what they do because it looks perfect all the time and up close, too! But I know from personal experience that my hair doesn't respond to frequent heat well. If they have more resilient hair, more power to them. But it is not an option for me, so I have to make do.

On the flipside, you said you do a natural and more gentle routine. Gentleness is always good (yay for not clarifying daily!), but natural products aren't necessarily better than conventional products. If you're abstaining for environmental/moral reasons, then that's fine, but if you are just looking for the better product for your hair, maybe expanding your horizons is a possibility. I looked at your albums, and I see the "pantene" picture and your hair looks lovely! It's hard to compare it to the post-LHC pictures as the lighting is very different. But is it possible that maybe the new natural routine makes you psychologically feel so good that you are seeing your hair as improved?

Whatever you decide to do, if you do decide to rethink your routine, do it with your own improvement in mind and not comparisons with others


So stay focused on you and enjoy your hair. PS. that wavy, voluminous thing your hair does in the front is really beautiful! I ask for hair like that on the rare instances I go to the salon.

(Thank you for the compliment! :flower: )

:( I do think that a lot of these people have different hair-- it looks very strong, like C hair. Nothin' I can do about that. :(

The pictures of my old hair are the very few pictures that have my hair decent enough to post. In those photos, my hair LOOKS okay, but it felt terrible-- it was ALWAYS clingy and dry. But the reasons I turned from those products was mostly ethical-- partly health. (I'm allergic to the scents in those products.) I think SO thinks my hair looked better then, too, so maybe it really did.

gothic_lady
March 18th, 2012, 04:21 PM
I see great hair and bad hair. More bad hair than great hair. The majority of girls and women I see everyday have great, healthy hair. Sometimes I envy them , sometimes not. It depends on my daily mood :)

Hollyfire3
March 18th, 2012, 04:35 PM
I feel this way all the TIME, it makes me sad....i wish i DIDN'T have to work so hard just to NOT have great hair, unlike everyone ELSE i see, who does so effortlessly.....maybe one day i will be blessed with naturally beautiful, full, shiny, smooth, thick (not just thick and frizzy like i have now, but smooth instead) hair without all the stress and effort that i use, resulting in ugly hair.....:(

Kristin
March 18th, 2012, 04:51 PM
Many people I know have nice-looking hair of a conventional length (chin-BSL). The few women I see with longer hair at work or running errands do not seem to care for it. (Because it is very obviously damaged, tangled, thrown into a ponytail where it proceeds to mat...)

It could be because you're in college that so many girls have long hair. It's more common to see long hair in younger groups. Remember that WL or even HL are not that long compared to some of the lengths on LHC; it could be that they can get away with some damaging practices and still have relatively nice hair by cutting off the damage.

And you're being too self-critical. Your hair is very pretty and doesn't look frizzy at all. If you think that your camera is the only one that doesn't pick up fly-aways, you're mistaken.

Rosethorn
March 18th, 2012, 05:03 PM
Where I live, there are lots of women (no men that I've seen :( ) that have beautiful hip or classic length hair that they wear loose every time I've seen them. What I don't get is that it is so cold, dry, and windy here and their hair is so healthy and lovely. Seriously, 50 mph gusts are common.

Debra83
March 18th, 2012, 05:04 PM
Anyone else experience this, too? Do you see LHC-worthy hair IRL daily?

Totally. I have two public service jobs - and I see it all the time. And, I feel the same way about my hair, almost embarrassed to tell anyone anything because mine seems so much in need of help all the time. And it is! I just have that type of hair.

Ps...that's why I'm on LHC to begin with!

Georgies
March 18th, 2012, 05:09 PM
A very large number of people where I live, including college students, have hair extensions. Really, really expensive ones. Are you sure that's not what you're looking at?! For all you know they've spends loads of time and money on their hair...and I absolutely guarantee that people are looking at your at your hair with just as much envy. No really, I looked at your albums, I'd love to have your hair! Some of us are still shorties you know. The grass is always greener.

lippleyluv
March 18th, 2012, 05:24 PM
I agree. I am surrounded by women who have long silky, glossy hair that grows like weeds. They wash daily, blow dry, flat iron, heat curl, bleach, color, strip it out, apply new color, perm, repeat, grow, grow, grow! GRRR!

I, on the other hand, baby my hair, no heat, no harsh bleach, root touch ups only, stretching washes, condition like crazy, wear hair up, agonize over each strand, etc. etc. and I still have frizzy, bushy hair that gets crunchy on the ends that requires regular trims to keep the ends from getting too bad. Dang it!

I think I will need to maintain at BSL for a while to see if that will remove the hair that gets crunchy. Sigh. Depressing.

I have a feeling that it doesn't really matter what I do or don't do. This is as good as it gets for me & I need to just deal with it. *Grumbles*:nono: :boohoo:

Hollyfire3
March 18th, 2012, 05:27 PM
I agree. I am surrounded by women who have long silky, glossy hair that grows like weeds. They wash daily, blow dry, flat iron, heat curl, bleach, color, strip it out, apply new color, perm, repeat, grow, grow, grow! GRRR!

I, on the other hand, baby my hair, no heat, no harsh bleach, root touch ups only, stretching washes, condition like crazy, wear hair up, agonize over each strand, etc. etc. and I still have frizzy, bushy hair that gets crunchy on the ends that requires regular trims to keep the ends from getting too bad. Dang it!

I think I will need to maintain at BSL for a while to see if that will remove the hair that gets crunchy. Sigh. Depressing.

I have a feeling that it doesn't really matter what I do or don't do. This is as good as it gets for me & I need to just deal with it. *Grumbles*:nono: :boohoo:


I feel the bad also, like this is as good as it gets for me, and everyone else is just better!

Ligeia_13
March 18th, 2012, 05:38 PM
It seems to be that way :p One of my friends has hair that grows fast. Another has thick, shiny straight hair with no split ends in sight. A third friend has golden hair down to her waist. I won't even mention the random girls I see with long long hair :p

My biggest envy was this girl who is no longer my friend but was at the time so I had to suffer in silence. Her hair grew from bsl to hip/tlb in a year, it looked fabulous with layers, had no split ends at all despite never trimming and she used to dye it.

So unfair.

Ligeia_13
March 18th, 2012, 05:39 PM
Accidental double post.

turtlelover
March 18th, 2012, 05:48 PM
Honestly, a lot of the hair I see looks damaged by color and flat ironing. Virgin hair in adults seems so rare. I rarely see hair that I envy, especially hair past midback length. I know a few people with hair that I wouldn't mind having, but I am pretty satisfied just to be myself. That wasn't always the case -- I had some serious streaks of hair envy in my younger days, but then as you get older, you tend to look on the bright side and appreciate what you DO have.

jc10event
March 18th, 2012, 05:52 PM
I see it a lot, often ask many of them about their hair. Most I run into with shiny, even, healthy looking keep it real simple. I'm not surprized that most are involved with a hair care community. I work at a college for part of the day and it is heaven to see how many are growing their hair out, even more guys.
I've run into 16 this year so far with waist length or longer.
The one thing I hear most common, water!!

jc10event
March 18th, 2012, 05:56 PM
Wow, incredibly beautiful, wavy hair, on an enchanting woman. Which part of the state are you in school.

Pinkster8
March 18th, 2012, 07:17 PM
Yes, to a point. A lot of girls at my school fried their hair but there are a few that have epic hair, my best friend being one. She doesn't take very good care of it either - plastic brush with nubs missing from the bristles, wearing it down and getting it caught, straightening without protectant, and her hair is just amazing. I always tell her that my hair wants to be like hers when it grows up :P

HintOfMint
March 18th, 2012, 08:26 PM
Hey there, posting again in reference to the comments that say that there are all these women (and some men) who seem to abuse their hair regularly and still have perfect and shiny hair.

First of all, not all damage shows in all light. Even if you are up close, you won't see the damage or the dry ends that come with abuse. Think of all the times y'all sat down to do S&D and the split ends had "disappeared!" It's the lighting.

Also, abuse like heat styling masks damage extremely well, up to a point. Once it's past shredded, then sure, nothing covers that up. But the point before that, with run of the mill damage? Nothing a blowdryer can't take care of. When I had BSL length hair that was damaged from rough brushing and blowdried every day, I still could blow dry it with product and everywhere I went, it was, "OMFG, your hair is awesome!" It was damaged as hell! Polite people don't usually stand so close to inspect your hair, so even at a reasonably close range, damaged hair can still look good if it is styled.

Also, there is the possibility that some of those people actually take care of their hair and don't heat style and perm. Maybe they're not obsessed with hair and aren't doing the natural haircare, using imported Tibetan Yak tears, but they're probably doing all the basics (no blowdrying, no color, more conditioner, less shampoo...). Just that alone would probably get people to waist or longer in good condition.

Are there some people who have good genes and can grow their hair superlong and have actual undamaged hair with all the heat and perms and whatnot? Sure. But it's not as common as we think. We're not even thinking of the hundreds of heads of hair we see every day that aren't anything to write home about. Our interest is on hair and so our brain only filters the good heads of hair and makes them more prominent.

I guess my point is that there aren't hordes of people out there with perfect heads of hair and there's no point feeling bad about your hair. The general tone of LHC is to get ACTUAL undamaged long hair and not long hair that only LOOKS undamaged. We're going through hair growing with a self imposed handicap of sorts. Most of the easy ways to make our hair look perfect require a little damage, so we forgo that. So our hair doesn't look as good as our neighbor's at the moment. Chances are, we're not operating on the same level playing field.

EdG
March 18th, 2012, 11:29 PM
Most of the people around me at work are men with little or no hair. Even the women in a professional environment rarely have hair past BSL.

That's why I hang around LHC so much. :D
Ed

cwarren
March 18th, 2012, 11:59 PM
Hey there, posting again in reference to the comments that say that there are all these women (and some men) who seem to abuse their hair regularly and still have perfect and shiny hair.

First of all, not all damage shows in all light. Even if you are up close, you won't see the damage or the dry ends that come with abuse. Think of all the times y'all sat down to do S&D and the split ends had "disappeared!" It's the lighting.

Also, abuse like heat styling masks damage extremely well, up to a point. Once it's past shredded, then sure, nothing covers that up. But the point before that, with run of the mill damage? Nothing a blowdryer can't take care of. When I had BSL length hair that was damaged from rough brushing and blowdried every day, I still could blow dry it with product and everywhere I went, it was, "OMFG, your hair is awesome!" It was damaged as hell! Polite people don't usually stand so close to inspect your hair, so even at a reasonably close range, damaged hair can still look good if it is styled.

Also, there is the possibility that some of those people actually take care of their hair and don't heat style and perm. Maybe they're not obsessed with hair and aren't doing the natural haircare, using imported Tibetan Yak tears, but they're probably doing all the basics (no blowdrying, no color, more conditioner, less shampoo...). Just that alone would probably get people to waist or longer in good condition.

Are there some people who have good genes and can grow their hair superlong and have actual undamaged hair with all the heat and perms and whatnot? Sure. But it's not as common as we think. We're not even thinking of the hundreds of heads of hair we see every day that aren't anything to write home about. Our interest is on hair and so our brain only filters the good heads of hair and makes them more prominent.

I guess my point is that there aren't hordes of people out there with perfect heads of hair and there's no point feeling bad about your hair. The general tone of LHC is to get ACTUAL undamaged long hair and not long hair that only LOOKS undamaged. We're going through hair growing with a self imposed handicap of sorts. Most of the easy ways to make our hair look perfect require a little damage, so we forgo that. So our hair doesn't look as good as our neighbor's at the moment. Chances are, we're not operating on the same level playing field.

Awesome pep talk! Talk about breaking down the basics :cheese: I guess I just have to get out of my "the grass is always greener" mindset.

xoxophelia
March 19th, 2012, 01:07 AM
I think it is mostly in the genes and general health. I was able to flat iron every day and have great hair before I got sick :shrug:

(then it shed out and took forever to grow back/is still growing back)

sfgirl
March 19th, 2012, 02:25 AM
I go to a school with a lot of Chinese girls, who all have BSL to waist hair.
They blowdry, straighten, and all at least lighten it to a light brown, or reddish brown.
Their hair is beautiful, shiny, thick and full. Just amazing. I'm not sure if it's a Chinese thing, since they have courser, thicker hair, but it is sooo beautiful.

Tota
March 19th, 2012, 03:05 AM
Sadly I don't see a lot of great hair around me. Before TLHC all long hair seemed beautiful to me. Now things are not so simple ;) I know only one person with almost perfect hair - my sis. She has stick straight, incredibly thick waist length hair. But she colors it and washes it with harsh SLS shampoos ... the hair is not damaged because of that, it's just not very shiny and it's too dry. Could be fixed but she just doesn't want it to.

Other people I know have hair that is not really impressive - damaged, fried, dyed etc. I sometimes see someone on the street that has impressive hair, but very rarely. People in general just don't care about their hair here.

MonaLisa
March 19th, 2012, 06:58 AM
I think I know what you mean. There's my sister, she dyes her hair, brushes it harshly, flat irons or curls it with heat, blow dries etc etc...hates oils and comments I am very silly for everything I put on my head... And then there's her hair, waist length, always looking great! It's not as fine as mine and it's thicker...but really made me wonder a few times if good LHC kind of care even matters... Hers looks more stylish yet healthy..
But then I started to realize...that UNLESS she uses a flatiron or curling iron to style it, it looks like a frizzy mess...AND she kinda has to wash it every second day...and once I saw it in direct sunlight, it looked fried and bad....made me really sad..:( I am trying to make her a bit more aware and share good practice now, because, yes...good care does matter..:)

And to answer your question - I have 1 friend with amazing virgin hair..blunt straght across cut, waist length...I guess it's perfect :) Completely healthy and shiny..I'm guessing 1a/M/ii..
But it is not type of hair I want, to me it looks a bit boring...I will always have U or V and some layers, and I love my texture after all :)

I know you said no compliments, but I love your hair, I'm sure I told you that ;)

cooklaezo13
March 19th, 2012, 07:49 AM
I am also in college. A lot of the women I see everyday have BSL to waist length hair, occasionally tailbone length. The hair seems mostly in good condition, although I see some unhealthy hair too, but mostly healthy hair. I see all hair textures, straight, wavy, wurly, curly, very curly and kinky. It seems to be a trend to wear hair in its natural texture, rather than perming, flat ironing or blowdrying, which I enjoy very much seeing all the beautiful different textures of long hair. Sadly I do not get to see many lovely updos. Most women either wear their hair down, in a ponytail, or up in a messy bun made with a hair tie. I wonder if they know all of the cool buns and braids they could make with their hair?!?! I'd love to introduce some of my long hair friends to LHC. Maybe they know how to do their hair in buns or braids but don't due to lack of time, I know I often throw my hair and outfit together minutes before going to class when I am in a hurry. College life can be stressful and hurried sometimes.
I don't see very many men with long hair at my college. There are only two that I know of (I go to a very small college). One has waist-length, stick straight brown hair that is shiny and looks healthy, blunt cut, maybe ii thickness. The other long-haired man wears his hair in a big, magnificent, perfectly shaped afro. These two guys are friends and I always see them together, so I get to admire both of their beautiful heads of hair at once.
There are some women I see everyday at my college who have very edgy short asymmetrical haircuts that look great always. They must get them trimmed regularly to keep them looking so good.
Sometimes when I see other women with long hair, it makes me regret cutting my long hair off, but I enjoyed having short hair and I am enjoying growing my hair out. I appreciate the unique beauty of everyone I meet and somehow I can enjoy their beautiful hair without getting jealous. I think the secret is not to compare oneself to others, and try to appreciate the uniqueness of your own beautiful hair. Your hair looks great BTW. I love your waves and although I don't see any frizziness or flyaways, I don't mind the look of flyaway hair at all, to me it makes the hair look free and lovely :) . I think we are often more harsh in our appraisals of our own selves than we are with others.

terylenerose
March 19th, 2012, 03:30 PM
I wouldn't say great hair, but I often see other people (girls) at my school with BSL, waist or hip length hair and it looks fine. Every now and then, though, I get to look at someone's hair close up and sometimes it does look a bit fried. I see a lot of frizzy looking curly hair (mine included, nothing I can do), which is probably due to the popularity of straighteners. I also don't see a lot of hair being worn up, which is why I tend to get comments when I wear it in braids.
Also, I think straightening a 2 year old's hair borders on child abuse. :( There are so many alternatives out there. Why deprive an innocent child of seeing her natural curls? That just seems wrong.

heidi w.
March 19th, 2012, 03:35 PM
Where I live it's a high population of poverty -- something like 40% impoverished in the area. One thing that happens in poverty, is you look like crap most of the time. One doesn't have money to get hair done, money to afford really great clothes.

Therefore, where I live, I see a lot of friend hair, fuzzy hair, unkempt hair. I also witness a lot of Black women with fairly bedraggled hair.

It's very sad. But that's the way it is.

Here, a whole boatload of people do not wear any makeup or can afford to fix themselves up much. There's a lot of sweatpants and pajama pants wearing going on, oversized T-shirts going on, dragging belongings around in baby strollers and stuff like that. Locally, for the most part, even the elderly here are driving really old cars and outright heaps for vehicles.

It's quite poor here. That's just the way it is.

If one makes 30K/yr here, they have a "good" income. Most workers here have to work 2 jobs, usually part time jobs, too, to make it.


heidi w.