Have you cut back from classic length?

[Jaynyne]

:waving:

Old LHCer returning home for some advice. I see a lot of names I don't know, so I guess that means many of you won't know me. But I'm hoping some of my old friends will chime in, too.

My fiance and I are finally getting married in a month. For the last two or three months, I've been seriously thinking of getting my hair cut. It's classic length now, but the truth is I only do two things with it ever: single braid (which always gets ratty looking by the end of the day) or infinity bun, which is super easy and always holds well. I'll occasionally make a braided bun or a swirly bun, but the truth is I'm just to lazy to do anything else. My hair is too long to wear it down or in a ponytail comfortably, and I miss that. Sweetie doesn't like my hair up at all, and since I miss wearing it down too, I'm seriously considering having about 6 to 8 inches cut off, which will make it be somewhere around tailbone. Maybe even a little shorter. (Mind you, I'm not talking short at all. The shortest I think I would consider is waist, and even that makes me nervous).

I guess at this point, I like the idea of having my hair this long, but in reality I'm not getting the joy out of it. I figure the worst that can happen if I cut is that I decide I do want to have classic length hair and can just let it grow again, but that in the meantime I could be more creative with my hair, and get some of the enjoyment back. Do you think I'm treating this too casually? I need some perspective.

Snowy told me that a few folks I'd know on the board have cut some length back and are happy with the decision. Is this true?!? :ohmy:

So please share your thoughts & experiences. I only have three weekends between now and the wedding, so I have to poo or get off the pot! (Different kind of 'poo. Hair humor there).

Oh, yeah, I should say that we're getting married in a very informal ceremony on a schooner in Maine, so don't be picturing a traditional wedding. The rules are very different with this one. :silly:

[Dulci]

:waving: Hey Jayne, it's good to see you, and congratulations on the wedding!

I've know how you feel. I've been cutting mine back an inch every wash, I'm on my way back to tailbone. I'd love to be able to wear my hair loose once in a while, instead of this eternal braid.

That doesn't help with your decision though, are you wanting to wear it loose at your wedding?

[Florida Mom]

Well first off - CONGRATULATIONS on your wedding! :-)

I'm one of the new ones to the board - so pleased to meet you.

Have you followed the two week rule - wait two weeks and then cut only if you are sure?

What length was your hair when you were able/ and willing to put it up more or wear it down -- was your hair easier to maintain at TB?

What about cutting a couple of inches off and wait another two weeks?

[lora410]

Hi, I don't think I have meet your either. I would suggest do an inch at a tiem just in case you find a length in between that is easy for you :flower: and congrats on your upcoming marriage!!!

[Delenn]

I'm of the mindset if it's not making you happy then try something different. Tailbone isn't that drastic of a change, I'd start there. You can always grow it back or make it even shorter, depending how things turn out. The last time I had the urge for a change it was between staying at waist length or cutting really really short, that was a difficult decision for sure! But in the end I needed change so the short hair worked for me for a few years. Here I am again though with hip length and as long as it makes me happy I'm going to keep it. :)

[dor3girl]

I agree with the posters here--cut the hair to tailbone or hip and go from there. It will grow back fairly quickly, anyhow (especially if you are at classic length). If your fiance likes it down, then find a length that makes you both happy. What does he think you should do?

[burns_erin]

Congrats on the wedding. I good long time ago I cut from classic up to shoulders and was not happy and have not been able to get back there yet, but you are not even thinking of going that drastic. I second, or third the suggestion of a few inches at a time. Or you may just want to think of how much it will grow back in 1 year and cut back to that point. A year is not so very long in terms of hair growth for a long term grower.

[Honey39]

I would say cut it off in one go so you get the pleasure of the change - going against advice here!! But to me, hair is to be ENJOYED, and if you're not enjoying it, then cut it back. It's still going to be seriously long, and you might get more fun out of it.

To me - after only two months, so remember, I know nothing, lol! - I LOVE the fact that I am wearing my hair down every day, and that I am getting real pleasure out of it. i love the fact that it looks pretty and free every day. I hated it when I didn't know what to do with my hair and I would get one good day (wash day) for every two days (bun days). So I am trying to do things in moderation, CO-ing, oiling, no blow drier etc - but equally, I want to revel in my hair, not have it for the sake of having it. That's just my opinion though for me, but if you're not loving it, then cut it back 6 inches. Which is only one year's growth....!

If you do it incrementally, that IS going to be safer and better in some ways, but you also won't get the swishiness of having hair that is considerably shorter than you're used to, and which you want, from the sound of it.

Having said that, I do NOT have very long hair, so not meaning to tread on toes here!

[spidermom]

I'm generally of the "quit fretting and just do it!" mindset. Yes, if you cut it, you may regret it. But guess what? If you DON'T cut it, you may regret it.

[Shell]

Do you wear it up all of time because you sit on it? If so, maybe just cut off 2-3 inches and maintain there. That way you won't sit on it, but it'll still be really long. Or, have you worn it up for a long time? If you've been wearing it up for years, you might consider tailbone or even hip length.

In your place, I'd probably take 3 inches off, and wear it that way for a week or so, and then decide if I wanted to take more off. This way, if you hate it, it'll take only 6 months or so to get your current length back.

Congrats on the wedding!

[Zombiekins]

I guess at this point, I like the idea of having my hair this long, but in reality I'm not getting the joy out of it. I figure the worst that can happen if I cut is that I decide I do want to have classic length hair and can just let it grow again, but that in the meantime I could be more creative with my hair, and get some of the enjoyment back. Do you think I'm treating this too casually? I need some perspective.


I don't think you're being too casual at all. But, I'm also of the persuasion that "Seriously, it's only hair, growing it to the floor won't give you magic powers and coveting something you don't enjoy because someone else thinks you should is never going to make you happy." I'd cut my hair to my chin tomorrow if I felt like it....or, you know, if it would look super cute (probably wouldn't :rolleyes:).

Anyway, you're totally echoing my situation last month. I'd lost all "joy" in having my hair long. Mostly because the ends were **** and tangled the instant it was down. It was always up, always pulling at my scalp, my small collection of "hair toys" sucks, and really, I'd just missed wearing it down -- without worrying about too many tangles and sitting on it.

So, I brushed it out all pretty like, had the bf take a picture, and cut a few inches off the next night. Then a little more next time I washed, then a little more after that. :p All in all I probably cut off...uhh...maybe a foot or so. It's hovering around my belly button area now. Yes, it's a huge difference, and for two whole minutes I was sad about not having all of my bits covered by my hair when it was down and I was nekkid....but after tangling it in the wind and brushing it out in two minutes without yanking, snapping, or any real effort, it was totally worth it to cut! Plus I can wear it down all the time now, even at home without getting too annoyed with it. :)

If you're serious about trimming some inches, give it a week or two; then go nuts. :p Nah, just take off like two inches at a time until it's at a length you're comfortable with. I trim my own hair so it was easy to go in stages (or get carried away...). Oh, but definitely take a picture before you do it! It'll be nice to have the reminder of how long it was in the event you decide to keep it shorter. :)

[esme]

Hello, Jaynyne -- I just returned myself. :wave:

I'm far from classic, but... well, if you regret it, it WILL grow back. If you're not particularly enjoying it at classic, why not?

[julya]

If I end up deciding to cut at some future point, I would want to save the hair that I cut in a little braid so I wouldn't want to just cut an inch or two at a time. I would just follow the two week rule, and then take the plunge.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

[spidermom]

AS suggested earlier, be sure to get a picture or two before you cut. And after. Then post them. We're all still very visual around here.

[daydreamer]

Ah, your post is exactly why I am unsure whether to grow to tailbone or classic. I am afraid I would be stuck with updos all the time and never wear it loose, as well. For me, wearing hair loose sometimes is part of the fun.
I think I would cut it enough to make it possible to wear down without too much annoyance, but not so much to cause sadness. Wherever that might be, lol -- perhaps tailbone as you said.

[Carolyn]

Hi Jaynyne! Good to see you again! :waving: Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! I'm 6" shorter now than I was in February. In that time period I've cut off 9" and grown 3". I miss my longer hair every single day. I do not miss my thinner hemline. My hair is easier to wear down now but I rarely do it. I miss the place where my braid tassel used it tickle my back. My first trim was 5" done in 3 increments on one day. I've had 2 more 2" trims since then. I'm very glad I did it in small steps. I know I couldn't have handled doing it all at once. Each step took an adjustment. Since my last trim about a month ago, I know I'm ready to grow it longer again.

How do you want to wear your hair for your wedding day? I'd make that my biggest consideration. If it's down and several inches shorter than you are now, I'd trim a bit each upcoming wash day and see how you feel. You may *think* you need, let's say for example, 6" off but in reality you might be happy with 4" off. Go slow and be conservative. Regrets suck and it's hell to wait for hair to grow out.

[Juliet's Silk]

How to you want to wear your hair for your wedding day? I'd make that my biggest consideration. If it's down and several inches shorter than you are now, I'd trim a bit each upcoming wash day and see how you feel. You make *think* you need, let's say for example, 6" off but in reality you might be happy with 4" off. Go slow and be conservative. Regrets suck and it's hell to wait for hair to grow out.

My thoughts. I wouldn't cut before the wedding for two reasons:
1) I wouldn't do such a drastic change right before the wedding
2) I love the thought of having classic length hair at the wedding. :lol: How do you want to wear it? I personally would wear it down with some elaborate braids or something so the more length the better, even though classic length is a hassle to wear down, I'd to it for that special day.
If you want to wear it all up anyway, then it's not important if your hair is TBL or classic length anyway. :)
For day to day, TBL is probably much easier and you're quite right in saying that you can just grow it back. So, cut after the wedding to TBL and see how you like it, but I wouldn't rush the trim.

[Tangles]

I recommend hip length too. It's still super long and romantic looking, but you can wear it down pretty easily, though not every day.

[k_hepburn]

I recently had my hair cut back from just touching on tailbone to slightly above waist, which was slightly shorter than I had wanted it, but not by much. That was about four weeks ago. To be honest, I'm still not past the "My god, it's so SHORT now" grieving phase. I did it because I felt my ends were getting a bit thinnish - but to add insult to injury I've since had to come to realise that my slightly tampering ends were much better to twist into a bun than the thicker ones I've got now.

So, what I'm trying to say: getting a major cut can be a liberation, but it can also be a major shock to the system. Not the kind of thing you want to do to yourself before a wedding. If your fiance (congratulations from me too!) prefers your hair open, and you like to wear it open, than hair at your present length would be suitable for some gorgeous medieval or Lord-of-the-Rings style of wearing your hair down. I'd hazard a guess that that would be a really special look that would go perfectly with a wedding dress.

If you want to gain more diversity as to what you can do with your hair, I too would be in the "do it an inch at a time" fraction. That way at each new length you can figure out what styles do or don't work, and if you decide you liked the previous length better, it will only take a few months to get back there. Plus, you won't lose that way your hair feels and moves at it's particular length all of a sudden - for me that was one of the biggest drawbacks of the bug chop.

Whatever you do, I hope you'll be thoroughly happy with your decision and will have a most wonderful wedding day

katharine

[TammySue]

It's so nice to see you again!! Congrats on your upcoming wedding!

I remember your hair so well and it is just beautiful. Whatever you decide to do, it will still look lovely! :blossom:

[Áine]

Congratulations on your marriage!

I can add to the list of people who have "cut back". Just a month ago, I was fairy tailing past TBL, and I was always going for my dream of classic. But one day, I had a picture taken of me from behind, and when I saw how it looked loose, I was quite disappointed. I thought I would look good with ultra long hair, but I don't. I decided to cut back and maintain at around lower-waist/upper hip and maintain very blunt ends. I like the way it looks, and people who know me have been complimenting me left and right on how tidy it looks now. I may decide to let it go longer again in the future, but for right now, this is the perfect length for me. I am even surprised at how much I have grown to like it. You may see yourself liking the change as well.

[truepeacenik]

I don't think you're being too casual at all. But, I'm also of the persuasion that "Seriously, it's only hair, growing it to the floor won't give you magic powers

oh man, I bought into that :jestor:

Anyway, getting married on a schooner brings one word to mind: wind.
cut back to a bit past waist (I'm big on not returning to past landmarks), grow it back out if you want.


(still upset that I don't get magic powers)

[Golden21]

I am also a newbie that you haven't met. Congrats on your big day coming up!
I would say to cut it so that you learn to fall in love with your hair again. Or, cut an inch at a time and see how you feel after each inch.

[wonhwa]

Hi, congratulations on your wedding! I did cut my hair back from classic just two months ago. I did it myself, cut off about enough to get to hipbone, 7 inches or so. I liked it, but had sort of goofed up and had messy hemline.
So two weeks ago my niece came, and she tidied up the ends for me. I had been trying to do that myself a little at a time. After my niece has made it perfect, it is just past waist.
I love it! It swings, it moves, I don't sit on it! It doesn't fall into things.
And it will grow. in less than a year it will be classic again if I want it there.

Go for it; do a little bit, see if that's enough. If not, do a little more.
Who said that it must remain very long if you find it driving you crazy, or wanting change? That's the fun you can cut it a bit, then have the fun of all those hairstyles again as it grows.
Wonhwa

edit: guess I need to add another photo, as it is now just past waist.

[nostalgic]

i'm new here so we've never "met" but congratulations on your wedding and i think it's great that you've come back for advice! my hair is still short so i wish i had your predicament haha! in all seriousness though, it sounds like you have very valid reasons for wanting to cut it and have already mapped out a plan as well as a worse-case scenario. i'd say go for it! you'll still be a longhair and have the best of both worlds!
(turns green at having ANYTHING close to waist!)

[Jaynyne]

You guys are the best. :cheese: (I have no idea where you found the dancing cheese smilie, but how perfect!) Carolyn, Dulci, TammySue, Esme, SpiderMom & new friends :grouphug:

Some of you raised some points that I haven't thought of. I'm also really glad to have heard from people who have actually cut some of their length; it is good to hear from those happy as well as those shell-shocked by the experience (does anyone have before and after photos they'd be willing to point me to?). I'm happy to hear that regret isn't inevitable. Possible, but not inevitable. I think that's what I needed to know. I've been thinking about doing this for months (maybe even since January) so I'm not being impulsive.

Because of your various suggestions, I was able to think this through pretty thoroughly. I don't want to wear my hair up for the wedding because my sweetie really, really doesn't like it that way. I also do not like the way my hair looks when it's loose at the moment, so that plays into it too. I'm hoping to wear mine in some sort of simple ponytail, that I can undo for the actual ceremony. There is no way I could do that with my hair now.

I made an appointment to see my stylist on Saturday. (He is over 60 miles away--and the only person I trust with my hair--so I can't quite do the "cut an inch at a time" technique.) We are talking about cutting it back to tailbone area. However, before finishing up, I'll take a break and go have coffee at my mom's and think about that length, and then head back to the salon for him to either finish up the ends, or take a bit more off. He'll do that for me easily. He really wants to style my hair for the wedding (he loves braiding) but I'm getting married almost 800 miles away from home, so that's not in the cards.

I may be unsure of the exact length I'll end up with, but one thing I do know is that I don't want blunt ends, because my hair is too thick to twist into a bun with blunt ends! At least I'm sure of something.

Thanks also for the congratulations, but since this has been a very, very long engagement this is really just a chance to go out on our favorite schooner with some friends. No wedding dress to match my hair to (does that give me more of less freedom? I"m confused!)