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View Full Version : How to deal with not so nice hairdresser advice



Beckstar
March 2nd, 2012, 08:44 PM
I dislocated my right shoulder about 6 weeks ago so I've been going to the salon once a week and getting shampooed, conditioned, detangled and braided. I use dry shampoo on my roots between visits. I went last night and I can honestly say that the hairdresser was one of the pushiest people I've ever run across.

1. (as she unbraids my hair and holds it out to its full length. The look on her face was like she was holding a sack of poop) "Have you thought about cutting your hair?"
2. (still survying the length) "When is the last time you had a haircut?"
3. (after I repeatly told her I am growing my hair longer because I love long hair) "I can usually talk people into letting me cut their hair and they leave very happy. It's easy to take care of and doesn't tangles."
4. (she asked what I use to shampoo) "Why do you use that shampoo (Aussie Moist) it will damage your hair. We have X brand and X detangler that will work much better."
5. (I specifically said that I always wear my hair in a braid or braided bun but can't braid it myself.) "Would you rather have a ponytail than braid?"
6. (I told her my hair hasn't been properly detangled in about a week) "You need to see a doctor. This isn't normal. (Referring to the gobs of hair that came out well she combed my hair.) I kept telling her it was normal. 100+ hairs a day + 7 days = 700 or more hairs. It is going to look like more when you have long hair.
8. "Do you have psoriasis?" (my scalp was very flaky but not scaly or scabby. Hello? It has been a week since my hair was last shampooed. I have been using dry spray during the week. Of course I'm going to have a flaky scalp.) "Well, I'm not a doctor but that doesn't sound right. Are you on any medications? Hormones?" (Yep, not a doctor.)

She went through a list of all different shampoos and was trying to explain what they did and I got to the point where I'd cut her off and tell her exactly why the shampoo didn't work and what the ingredients were and what they did. :cheese: Basically she wasn't listening to me and taking into account that I might know what I wanted. A shampoo, condition, detangle and a braid. I did a lot of this :rolleyes: and didn't let her get to me. She wanted to just trim the ends...um, no way are you getting near my head with scissors. I smelled an "oops" moment. I didn't get mad, I wasn't snippy back, and I hope she learned a few things from me.

(I hope no English Majors read this. ) :)

Long_hair_bear
March 2nd, 2012, 08:53 PM
Well, I don't have your problem because my hair dresser has been my hair dresser for 7 years and she knows that I have hair cut phobia and will not approach me with scissors. That lady is lucky. Had it been me, I'd have walked out. Just tell her it's your hair, not hers, and thanks for the advice, but no thanks. If she's still pushy, walk out. You are paying her to do what you want, not what you don't want and would regret.

Miss Catrina
March 2nd, 2012, 08:56 PM
I think I would have walked out. Good lord.

Hollyfire3
March 2nd, 2012, 08:58 PM
I would have walked out no questions asked it is good you handled it so well i would not have. I once had a hairdresser who told me my hair could not grow long and lookgood and she gave me gappy terrible long layers for years to boot, not fun 4 yrs of my hair growing life, now i only go for color to her i have a better hair dresser for cuts.

Mairéad
March 2nd, 2012, 08:59 PM
Maybe it's just me, but I would have already gotten wordy with her. I would have told her that I want a wash, a detangle, and braid; nothing else. Does she really expect someone with a dislocated shoulder to come in with their best looking hair?

ChloeDharma
March 2nd, 2012, 09:16 PM
It does beg the question why she feels entitled to bully people into cutting their hair AND boasts about it.

I hope next time you ask to be seen by a different hairdresser, explaining why.

roxee
March 2nd, 2012, 09:24 PM
wow what a rude woman, it sounds like you dealt with her very graciously (and a heck of alot better than I could of lol)

jeanniet
March 2nd, 2012, 09:30 PM
Maybe it's just me, but I would have already gotten wordy with her. I would have told her that I want a wash, a detangle, and braid; nothing else. Does she really expect someone with a dislocated shoulder to come in with their best looking hair?
This. Of course if you can't lift your arms your hair is not going to look great after a week--why did she think you were going to the salon in the first place?

I think there are many, many great stylists out there who would have done exactly what you asked for, and commiserated with you in the bargain. It must be terribly frustrating to not be able to care for your own hair! It's just too bad that this stylist couldn't do that.

holothuroidea
March 2nd, 2012, 09:42 PM
PPPPFFFFFFFTTTTTTT How rude!

Make sure you remember her name and specifically request not to have her next time you have to go.

I'm sorry she was so pushy. Sometimes people are so wrapped up in themselves they don't realize they are dealing with another human being. She probably thought she was the greatest ever and she was going make it look just like she wanted it to, completely disregarding that it was someone else's hair and someone else's feelings. :shake:

Beckstar
March 2nd, 2012, 09:43 PM
Normally I would have said, no thank you and walked out but that's at times when I'm able to care for my own hair. I was there and really needed my hair washed. The one redeeming thing was the amazing scalp massage she gave as she was washing my hair. I guess she's used to people coming in not really knowing what they want and looking for suggestions. I know what I want and no one can change my mind or pressure me into doing anything with my hair that I don't want to. I only saw her because the girl who has been washing my hair wasn't in that day. That is the first not so great experience I've had. Everyone else has been very nice and compassionate. And I hear about how healthy my hair is and how it is in good shape...guess she didn't like long hair or just needed to make some sales.

Seeshami
March 2nd, 2012, 09:53 PM
That's why the only hair dressers I speak to are my cousins. Who, if I called up right now and said cut off seven inches they would do 4 or 3 and ask me if it was enough. They like my long hair enough to LIE to me about how much they cut, in the; "Oh she said an inch so I'll just do a half and she'll never notice"

Macaroni
March 2nd, 2012, 10:18 PM
I hope you didn't tip her.

I'd avoid her and make it a point to go to the one who usually does your hair.

SunlightShines
March 2nd, 2012, 10:32 PM
It's such a shame that some hairdressers push for what they want instead of listening to what you've asked for.

A good thing you didn't let her give you that "trim!" I had one of those once! It was definitely an oops moment.

Tisiloves
March 3rd, 2012, 02:54 AM
Urgh. Some hairstylists just get a little focussed on what they think hair should be like, but they shouldn't be rude. :mad:

I hope your shoulder gets better soon :flowers:

I was bad enought dislocating my left thumb.

melusine963
March 3rd, 2012, 03:23 AM
The sad thing is that she probably thought she wouldn't be doing her job if she wasn't pushy. Thank goodness you stood your ground because that would almost certainly have been an 'oops' moment.

gretchen_hair
March 3rd, 2012, 06:20 AM
I would have gotten up, walked to the counter, asked for the manager and asked for another hairdresser.

Too bad she tried to shove her opinions and desires down your throat, and too bad she made your experience miserable. :flower:

I would still call the manager and tell her how the woman made you feel, she needs a little more training on compassion and how to deal with the public.

Coffeebug
March 3rd, 2012, 11:45 AM
She is very lucky you're a nice person and you didn't walk. How outrageously rude. Going to a salon is supposed to be a nice experience, you're not supposed to have to sit there fending off insults!

lunalocks
March 4th, 2012, 09:38 AM
Time to get a new hairdresser. Hope your shoulder heals soon.

The-Young-Maid
March 4th, 2012, 09:58 AM
How rude!! I can't believe someone would do that! I'm glad I don't have to deal with those kinds of HDs, I've been going to the same HD since I was little.

spidermom
March 4th, 2012, 10:07 AM
I think you handled the situation beautifully. Good for you not sinking to her level!

noelgirl
March 4th, 2012, 10:15 AM
"Have you ever thought about cutting your hair" - ugh, that question makes me twitch. No, silly me, feral child that I am, I'm unfamiliar with the concept. Do tell me more :rolleyes:

You did well, though, remaining calm in dealing with her. I'm pretty sure there would have been tears if it had been me.

PixxieStix
March 4th, 2012, 10:20 AM
All I can say is good for you for handling it so well. I probably wouldn't have. In the past I probably would have let her bully me into a haircut and walked out with a product or two because of her attacking self esteem tactic, but that would not fly with me anymore. Yeesh. I hope you feel better soon and on your way to a full recovery.

Kinkycurlygurl
March 4th, 2012, 10:21 AM
I dislocated my right shoulder about 6 weeks ago so I've been going to the salon once a week and getting shampooed, conditioned, detangled and braided. I use dry shampoo on my roots between visits. I went last night and I can honestly say that the hairdresser was one of the pushiest people I've ever run across.

1. (as she unbraids my hair and holds it out to its full length. The look on her face was like she was holding a sack of poop) "Have you thought about cutting your hair?"
2. (still survying the length) "When is the last time you had a haircut?"
3. (after I repeatly told her I am growing my hair longer because I love long hair) "I can usually talk people into letting me cut their hair and they leave very happy. It's easy to take care of and doesn't tangles."
4. (she asked what I use to shampoo) "Why do you use that shampoo (Aussie Moist) it will damage your hair. We have X brand and X detangler that will work much better."
5. (I specifically said that I always wear my hair in a braid or braided bun but can't braid it myself.) "Would you rather have a ponytail than braid?"
6. (I told her my hair hasn't been properly detangled in about a week) "You need to see a doctor. This isn't normal. (Referring to the gobs of hair that came out well she combed my hair.) I kept telling her it was normal. 100+ hairs a day + 7 days = 700 or more hairs. It is going to look like more when you have long hair.
8. "Do you have psoriasis?" (my scalp was very flaky but not scaly or scabby. Hello? It has been a week since my hair was last shampooed. I have been using dry spray during the week. Of course I'm going to have a flaky scalp.) "Well, I'm not a doctor but that doesn't sound right. Are you on any medications? Hormones?" (Yep, not a doctor.)

She went through a list of all different shampoos and was trying to explain what they did and I got to the point where I'd cut her off and tell her exactly why the shampoo didn't work and what the ingredients were and what they did. :cheese: Basically she wasn't listening to me and taking into account that I might know what I wanted. A shampoo, condition, detangle and a braid. I did a lot of this :rolleyes: and didn't let her get to me. She wanted to just trim the ends...um, no way are you getting near my head with scissors. I smelled an "oops" moment. I didn't get mad, I wasn't snippy back, and I hope she learned a few things from me.

(I hope no English Majors read this. ) :)

I'd try to find someone else to do my hair. She was incredibly rude to a customer. It's like she forgot that you were paying her for a service.

Aggemam
March 4th, 2012, 10:21 AM
Wow...horrible... I don't let anyone apart from my mum near my hair, has had A LOT of bad experiences...

thelambscottage
March 4th, 2012, 10:28 AM
I was once told (by a hairdresser who specializes in long hair) that hairdressers are told in beauty school to try and get people with long hair to cut it short because then you will be more apt to want it permed and colored and will come back every 6 weeks for the usual trim or maybe try the newest style. Anyway, it sounds like she was being very rude.

Alvrodul
March 4th, 2012, 10:31 AM
I dislocated my right shoulder about 6 weeks ago so I've been going to the salon once a week and getting shampooed, conditioned, detangled and braided. I use dry shampoo on my roots between visits. I went last night and I can honestly say that the hairdresser was one of the pushiest people I've ever run across.

1. (as she unbraids my hair and holds it out to its full length. The look on her face was like she was holding a sack of poop) "Have you thought about cutting your hair?"
2. (still survying the length) "When is the last time you had a haircut?"
3. (after I repeatly told her I am growing my hair longer because I love long hair) "I can usually talk people into letting me cut their hair and they leave very happy. It's easy to take care of and doesn't tangles."
4. (she asked what I use to shampoo) "Why do you use that shampoo (Aussie Moist) it will damage your hair. We have X brand and X detangler that will work much better."
5. (I specifically said that I always wear my hair in a braid or braided bun but can't braid it myself.) "Would you rather have a ponytail than braid?"
6. (I told her my hair hasn't been properly detangled in about a week) "You need to see a doctor. This isn't normal. (Referring to the gobs of hair that came out well she combed my hair.) I kept telling her it was normal. 100+ hairs a day + 7 days = 700 or more hairs. It is going to look like more when you have long hair.
8. "Do you have psoriasis?" (my scalp was very flaky but not scaly or scabby. Hello? It has been a week since my hair was last shampooed. I have been using dry spray during the week. Of course I'm going to have a flaky scalp.) "Well, I'm not a doctor but that doesn't sound right. Are you on any medications? Hormones?" (Yep, not a doctor.)

She went through a list of all different shampoos and was trying to explain what they did and I got to the point where I'd cut her off and tell her exactly why the shampoo didn't work and what the ingredients were and what they did. :cheese: Basically she wasn't listening to me and taking into account that I might know what I wanted. A shampoo, condition, detangle and a braid. I did a lot of this :rolleyes: and didn't let her get to me. She wanted to just trim the ends...um, no way are you getting near my head with scissors. I smelled an "oops" moment. I didn't get mad, I wasn't snippy back, and I hope she learned a few things from me.

(I hope no English Majors read this. ) :)
I would have asked the hairdresser to stop making remarks like that, and if she did not, I would have got off that chair around your point 3 and either demanded another hairdresser, or just left the salon. I would certainly not entrust my hair to her!

Unofficial_Rose
March 4th, 2012, 10:49 AM
I think it would be worth complaining to the salon manager, if you feel up for that.

Experiences like this are the reason so many of us trim our own hair.

lapushka
March 4th, 2012, 10:52 AM
I would have asked the hairdresser to stop making remarks like that, and if she did not, I would have got off that chair around your point 3 and either demanded another hairdresser, or just left the salon. I would certainly not entrust my hair to her!

Just like Alvrodul, I would have had a problem letting her handle my hair after all of that nonsense. It's nice that you remained calm, though. If I were you, I'd have lost patience with her. I'd have asked her if she could do what I wanted her to, and if not, I'd have told her that I'd find someone who could. It's bad enough that your shoulder's hurt. You don't need the additional hassle.

linnepinne
March 4th, 2012, 11:09 AM
I feel your pain! I had a similar thing happen to me this past week when I went for a trim to get rid of some really ratty and dry ends.

The hairdresser was horribly rude and basically made me feel like an idiot for not using expensive shampoo (though she did reccomend sulfate free stuff) and deep treatments, she told me flat out that I could "never get long hair that is BEAUTIFUL" if I didn't shampoo twice and use a coney treatment afterwards.

And when I told her that I use honey and vinegar on my hair she looked utterly horrified , but I'm an honest gal and she asked :shrug: - won't be doing that mistake again, I actually thought she might be interested in some alternative long hair care methods.

I'm in a bad place emotionally right now, and she made me feel so depressed about my hair and my LHC ways. I was *this* close to just caving in and just bying the products she reccomended, but shortage of money saved me from that (the stuff was super expensive!). You are very strong who didn't let her brake you! :cheer:

I will not make the mistake of telling a hairdresser about my natural haircare again, the next time I will just get in, tell them what I want, get it done, and make minimum conversation about hair.

Emmental
March 4th, 2012, 11:42 AM
Like everyone else, it sounds like you handled yourself well!


"Have you ever thought about cutting your hair" - ugh, that question makes me twitch. No, silly me, feral child that I am, I'm unfamiliar with the concept. Do tell me more :rolleyes:

Haha. I've never thought much of being asked that question, but now when I'm asked, I'm going to chuckle to myself.

FrozenBritannia
March 4th, 2012, 12:14 PM
Wow, she sounds really full of herself. Talking people into cutting their hair and then how much they love it.. Yah, till they get home and wash it, and realise what they have done, and burst into tears.
I am glad you didn't give in, I would definately avoid her in the future.