The hair/LHC addiction thread

[terylenerose]

I don't know of any thread like this, and please remove it if there is. I have heard the idea mentioned a few times, and I think there should be a thread for those of us who can't seem to stop obsessing over our hair or reading the forums. I know I have this problem. You can read why below, or not if you wish. I have a particular reason.
I have had some sort of obsession issues over the past year or so, involving various stuff. I refer to these as the "epilepsy thing" and the "Irish rathole". I did not ask for this, and I found it very disturbing. After the last episode, I found it very helpful to spend a lot of time thinking about hair and obsessing over that instead. But that came with its own set of problems. For one thing, it sucks time. It also occupies my thoughts to the extent that it is sometimes hard for me to pay attention. I had the same thing happen with non-hair obsessions, though, so I consider this an improvement because I don't have the other problems that I had before I started thinking about my hair a lot.
I started comparing my attitude toward hair to an addiction when I watched this drug presentation at my school and one of the videos talked about these people who had used marijuana. They said stuff about how all they could think about was getting high and couldn't live their lives anymore, and it sounded a lot like me and hair. I still live my life, up to a point, but so much is being drained away because I think about hair all the time. I'm gradually recovering and getting things back on their feet, but it's hard.
Anyway, that's my story. Now keep in mind that I can't say everything in one post, so it's not everything I've been through with my hair by any stretch, but I covered the basics. If anyone has anything similar to share, I'd be happy to see it. And I'm sorry, but I don't have any 12-step program. Wish I did. I would have followed it myself.

[terylenerose]

Sorry everyone, bumping this thread...
Is it really that uninteresting, or is it just too puzzling to respond to?? Maybe I should have titled it Hairaholics Anonymous... :confused:

[Hollyfire3]

I have been obsses with my hair for nearly 5 years ever since i started watching Charmed and decided to apspire for Holly Marie Combs beautiful hair, it started small, i flat ironed my curls and started getting regular trims, hoping to grow my hair long, then i started dyeing, first semi permanent now permanent dye (dark brown, very dark brown) i have tried many hair products, from straightening to curl enchancing and everything in between. Now, today, i am a continuing addict to my hair, ever since this summer when i went out to Arizona and my hair became super dry and lost curl and all the flat iron damage caught up at once, i have been searching desperatly for a way to get my curl back even though i used to flat iron it out for years....i plan my life around my hair, i am sad to say, i cannot feel beautiful with my messed up and fincky hair, i am trying so hard and feel like nothing is working, i have tried giving up but feel empty, i have tried forgetting about it but it comes back. I want Holly Marie Combs' hair SOOOOOO bad...one day i vow i will have it. In my mind, this will all be worth it one day, i wish it was easier and am often jealous of others who beautiful hair seems to come so easy, but one day, they will be jealous of me, i just have to keep trying and never give up, trust me, i have obssesion issues anyways so this is better than other bad stuff in the world, rather cats, my hair and Charmed (those last two often go paw and paw) than other god-awful things

[Hollyfire3]

Sorry everyone, bumping this thread...
Is it really that uninteresting, or is it just too puzzling to respond to?? Maybe I should have titled it Hairaholics Anonymous... :confused:


I responed, just give people a sec, i am sure many will come:) in the mean time, read my story please

[Cara Heather]

I like the name Hairaholics Anonymous... but like any addict I am in denial

[XcaliburGirl]

I know what you mean, at least to some extent. I tend to get obsessed with things for a while. It helps to be obsessed with hair because it's a "trivial" thing compared with some of the other things in my life about which I would be worrying myself to the point of being miserable.

I feel like my hair obsession is wearing off a bit, though. I've had some busy days at work this week, so I haven't been on LHC as much. I've been trying to stick with benign neglect. I do the absolute minimum with my hair in the morning and try not to think about it. I usually am very tempted to buy something hair related at the store (grocery store, mall, etc.), but I am getting better at resisting.

Maybe find another harmless hobby to alternate with your hair? Make a conscious effort to concentrate on other things for a while or "be in the moment". I find the more things I can obsess about at once, it brings the intensity down and I can think about other things.

[hanne jensen]

I'm obsessed with my hair. Everything is centered around my hair. I don't even brush my teeth before my hair is up and out of the way. Hairwash day is an event. My first thought about everything is can it be used for hair. Is it hair friendly. I can go on and on. However, my obsession has paid off. My hair is at MBL and I've never had hair this long in my life. Every time I see my hair down I have a Holy Moly moment. I still can't believe that it's my hair.

[cfreya]

I agree maybe not to the same extent but I am always coming on here and reading EVERYTHING in search of new cures and treatments of my hair..

But then again even before LHC I was obsessed with products, I have thousands, not only for hair but make up, skincare, everything, maybe I am just a general shopaholic. Think I am going to join the use up your stash thread on here though as I am trying to stop buying so many products when I have so many 3/4 bottles and potions already!

[Amber_Maiden]

I like to obsess over it- helps me feel like I have some control over my life, and I know growing my hair long is a goal I can actually reach- that not anything can keep me from. Makes me feel better about some things.
My hair is a big focus for me. I sped hours on LHC a day, I dream about my hair, and wash day is a big deal. So is combing my hair and oiling it. I spend a lot on my hair, but very seldom wear it down anymore because I want to keep it safe. So, most people don't even know I have hair past my waist. :p
It's a bit of a bad thing- and I am for benign neglect fully. I'm trying to be more on the bandwagon regarding that. I've stopped caring so much about how my hair is growing, stopped taking pictures and measuring. I know it will get there, so I just ignore it now. I do my treatments, and that's it. I like obsess more about the colour now, and buy hair toys :p

[FrozenBritannia]

I check this site all the time, but I hesitate to say I am addicted. The days when I don't have time, I don't go into withdrawl or anything. Sure, if I am out and about and I see a long hair, or a person with fully white hair, or a red that looks like it might be hennaed, I definately think "oh I should write about it on LHC!" but by the time I get home I usually don't. Lol. I am always on the lookout for hair sticks now though, and I am much more careful with my hair, to the point of giving away my hair curling irons and flat irons so I would not be tempted. (more room for hair toys!) I spend a lot of time on you tube looking at buns etc for sure :)

[Vampyria]

Another hairaholic here ;) I tend to get really depressed sometimes and I discovered that taking care of my hair and thinking about the goal I wish to reach makes me forget about things that make me sad. But I plan to find myself another hobby and hopefully I will stop obsessing about my hair so much.

[my2cats1]

I think in many people it can be a positive -- less of an addition and more of a hobby. It is that for me. A positive escape; a hobby just for me. On Sundays my S.O. will watch football; I go do a deep treatment. It's my alone time, and taking care of my hair gives me motivation to eat healthy foods and exercise.

[lolot]

i get obsessed too, ive had long hair before and it just grow by forgetting about it, i didnt even take care of it, i used to dye, straighten and lots of bad things, but now i think all the time if im doing something wrong and that i can do this or that, when it gets tangled i get really worried and i move my appointments on my wash days so i have more hours for it, and i read the posts when i can, but ive noticed that i use it like a distracting factor for other and more important things, like when im sad or when im not in the mood or working, i guess it function like a drug but at least hair doesnt kill you

[woolyleprechaun]

Yes, Im hair obsessive. But to be honest, is it all that bad? Theres worse things to be addicted to. I find it almost meditave, like if Im in a stressfull situation I like to think 'I wonder what nice treatment to do on my hair tonight, as a treat for this crappy day?' or when Im worn out and ready to collapse in bed, I love taking some time to comb my hair out and reflect on how its improving and growing, and ponder how long it will be in 'x' amount of months/years. Realy clears my mind and chills me out. :) I love my hair addiction :)

[terylenerose]

Thanks, everyone, for your replies. :)
I'm sure it's completely positive for some people to be obsessed with your hair, and that's great. But for me, there is a good and bad side. It's also not so nice when my obsessions all get tangled up with each other, as they often do, and I have to write it down but don't want to. I'm a writer, by the way. And when I need to, say, finish my homework because it's due tomorrow or practice for the next dance competition, it's not a good idea to be spending all that time on LHC. It's definitely better than a drug, and it will not kill you, but it does kill your time.

[Hollyfire3]

quote=woolyleprechaun;2001536]Yes, Im hair obsessive. But to be honest, is it all that bad? Theres worse things to be addicted to. I find it almost meditave, like if Im in a stressfull situation I like to think 'I wonder what nice treatment to do on my hair tonight, as a treat for this crappy day?' or when Im worn out and ready to collapse in bed, I love taking some time to comb my hair out and reflect on how its improving and growing, and ponder how long it will be in 'x' amount of months/years. Realy clears my mind and chills me out. :) I love my hair addiction :)[/quote]


This, i agree, a hair obssession is not a bad thing:)

[Hollyfire3]

Thanks, everyone, for your replies. :)
I'm sure it's completely positive for some people to be obsessed with your hair, and that's great. But for me, there is a good and bad side. It's also not so nice when my obsessions all get tangled up with each other, as they often do, and I have to write it down but don't want to. I'm a writer, by the way. And when I need to, say, finish my homework because it's due tomorrow or practice for the next dance competition, it's not a good idea to be spending all that time on LHC. It's definitely better than a drug, and it will not kill you, but it does kill your time.


This is also true, my obsessions are often distractions from priorities, i need to learn time managment and i will be all good:)

[terylenerose]

This is also true, my obsessions are often distractions from priorities, i need to learn time managment and i will be all good:)
I really need to learn time management too. Have you tried just setting a bunch of alarms to remind you of when to do stuff? I am thinking of trying that sometime.

My obsessions were actually originally to distract me from my own problems, I think. I have been depressed off and on over the past few years for whatever reason, and I have had other various annoying issues, so I would obsess over things that I didn't have to deal with to distract me. I'm not depressed anymore, fortunately. But then my obsessions were becoming problems in themselves and I lost control of them, so I needed to distract myself yet again. I settled on hair. I really do like thinking about hair and it makes me feel good, and when I don't think about it or try not to my earlier, more disturbing thought patterns come back. At least that's how it used to be - it's getting more and more mixed up. And there's a slight tendency toward needing to think about hair to feel good. I also have a hard time when I have to leave the computer.

Okay, don't know if that made any sense.

[Hollyfire3]

I really need to learn time management too. Have you tried just setting a bunch of alarms to remind you of when to do stuff? I am thinking of trying that sometime.

My obsessions were actually originally to distract me from my own problems, I think. I have been depressed off and on over the past few years for whatever reason, and I have had other various annoying issues, so I would obsess over things that I didn't have to deal with to distract me. I'm not depressed anymore, fortunately. But then my obsessions were becoming problems in themselves and I lost control of them, so I needed to distract myself yet again. I settled on hair. I really do like thinking about hair and it makes me feel good, and when I don't think about it or try not to my earlier, more disturbing thought patterns come back. At least that's how it used to be - it's getting more and more mixed up. And there's a slight tendency toward needing to think about hair to feel good. I also have a hard time when I have to leave the computer.

Okay, don't know if that made any sense.


It makes total sense, don't feel bad, really. I didn't obsess originally because i have issues, i did so because things intrest me and i like to know more about them, curiosity, them love for something. But now, they do seem like my escape, my own little world where things go like i want them to, my hair doesn't always listen but it is the possibilty of making it perfect that i keep aming for. Have you ever heard of the show Charmed? i am obssed with that (this relates to the hair obsession beacuse i want Piper's hair), sorry to highjack, but i just want someone on here to notice, i bring it up sometimes on here, but i never get a response. I am also obssed with cats and a book series about cat called Warriors, this all sounds crazy, but i am not really i'm normal. I just obsess over things i love. I understand finding a better more positive obsession was necessary for you, i'm glad things are going better and hope they continue to get better. I say love your hair and obsess over it, the key to making obsessions work is not obsessing to the point of no return and overdoing it, you will only make it no fun and burn it out this way, thus burning out all the good things too that come with the obsession. Also, cutting soemthing out that is so important to you will make you feel empty and lead to worse obsessions possibly. So i say obsess, just learn when to balance, balance is key, do soemthing else you love, then go back to your hair, you will find you love your hair and the obsessions with it even more because you went away for a heartbeat, distance makes the heart grow fonder, they say. I have not tried setting alarms, i think it would do more harm than good because it would make you feel resticted and limited and make the obsession harder to balance out and deal with. Don't stop being passionate because you think it may be possibly may be bad, because there are also good things to this obsession. Try to remeber to focus on other things then just hair, then come back to your hair a reward. Sorry for the rambling and babling and the long post, hope this helps :)

[arielágua]

I believe I have a hair obsession but I don't like talking about it, because it's something quite personal.
I believe I always had, much before coming to LHC, and I think the main fault is my obsession with history, specially Middle Ages, Celtic and Viking times.
Once I was so addicted I started washing my hair daily, and it wasn't even oily or dirty, just simply the fact of touching it and I don't know, caring for it makes me feel good.
Though, I don't compare this addiction to a drug addiction or pot or weed or whatever that makes you hallucinate. I think all obsessions are different, and have different consequences. I never tried forgetting hair care or just deny my addiction to it, it's a part of me, like a religion.

[Pecheresse]

My ex had long hair (like TBL) & I liked his hair a lot. Despite his split ends, he had volume and awesome quality. However he used to believe everyone else's hair sucked since his was so great. He was calling himself "the princess" and I couldn't stand the narcissist attitude. When I broke up with him I promised myself I would grow much more beautiful hair than his. It won't be a revenge, but it will be a revelation. I have been obsessing over it lately, and it's been keeping my mind off bad stuff like many mentioned. It's all about me, my goals and my life now. Hair is a reflection of so many things going on under the surface...it tells so much about a person.

[Tota]

I guess I belong here :) I'm still far away from my goal length and health but the longer my hair gets, the more I love it and ofcourse, think and obsess about it. I also spend a lot of time on TLHC, maybe more than necessary, but I got all the information that helped my hair here. I believe I would chop all my hair off last summer if I wouldn't find TLHC at that time. This site gives me strength and knowledge I need to get the hair I always dreamt about ...
So I am a hair addict, but I don't see it as a bad thing. Everyone has to have some guilty pleasures. I don't wear jewellry, I don't care much about fancy clothes, shoes, etc., nothing visual that people do to themselves to look nice really gets to me ... But beautiful hair gets to me. :)

[cfreya]

I think in many people it can be a positive -- less of an addition and more of a hobby. It is that for me. A positive escape; a hobby just for me. On Sundays my S.O. will watch football; I go do a deep treatment. It's my alone time, and taking care of my hair gives me motivation to eat healthy foods and exercise.


I second this completely:o

[terylenerose]

It makes total sense, don't feel bad, really. I didn't obsess originally because i have issues, i did so because things intrest me and i like to know more about them, curiosity, them love for something. But now, they do seem like my escape, my own little world where things go like i want them to, my hair doesn't always listen but it is the possibilty of making it perfect that i keep aming for. Have you ever heard of the show Charmed? i am obssed with that (this relates to the hair obsession beacuse i want Piper's hair), sorry to highjack, but i just want someone on here to notice, i bring it up sometimes on here, but i never get a response. I am also obssed with cats and a book series about cat called Warriors, this all sounds crazy, but i am not really i'm normal. I just obsess over things i love. I understand finding a better more positive obsession was necessary for you, i'm glad things are going better and hope they continue to get better. I say love your hair and obsess over it, the key to making obsessions work is not obsessing to the point of no return and overdoing it, you will only make it no fun and burn it out this way, thus burning out all the good things too that come with the obsession. Also, cutting soemthing out that is so important to you will make you feel empty and lead to worse obsessions possibly. So i say obsess, just learn when to balance, balance is key, do soemthing else you love, then go back to your hair, you will find you love your hair and the obsessions with it even more because you went away for a heartbeat, distance makes the heart grow fonder, they say. I have not tried setting alarms, i think it would do more harm than good because it would make you feel resticted and limited and make the obsession harder to balance out and deal with. Don't stop being passionate because you think it may be possibly may be bad, because there are also good things to this obsession. Try to remeber to focus on other things then just hair, then come back to your hair a reward. Sorry for the rambling and babling and the long post, hope this helps :)
Thanks. :) Good suggestions - I'll give it some thought. It's okay to ramble. I do it too.
I'm sorry I didn't say anything to you about your story. I did read it, and I thought you might like to know that I used to want dark brown, straight hair too. I have seen some of your posts. But at this point, I have had to acknowledge that my hair is not going to get any straighter or darker any time soon, and I will just have to put up with it because my beliefs prohibit me from drastically changing my hair. I have also learned to like my hair by now, but I can fully understand what you want and I still want it sometimes too. I think I know what you mean about finicky hair - I often have to deal with hair that is half greasy and half dry because I'm growing out dye at the moment. Not dark brown dye, but red. Sorry I don't have anything more helpful to say - I am not by any means the world's greatest expert on hair.
I don't know about the alarms. I wouldn't know if they're restrictive because I haven't used them extensively myself, but I know what you're saying.

[Hollyfire3]

Thanks. :) Good suggestions - I'll give it some thought. It's okay to ramble. I do it too.
I'm sorry I didn't say anything to you about your story. I did read it, and I thought you might like to know that I used to want dark brown, straight hair too. I have seen some of your posts. But at this point, I have had to acknowledge that my hair is not going to get any straighter or darker any time soon, and I will just have to put up with it because my beliefs prohibit me from drastically changing my hair. I have also learned to like my hair by now, but I can fully understand what you want and I still want it sometimes too. I think I know what you mean about finicky hair - I often have to deal with hair that is half greasy and half dry because I'm growing out dye at the moment. Not dark brown dye, but red. Sorry I don't have anything more helpful to say - I am not by any means the world's greatest expert on hair.
I don't know about the alarms. I wouldn't know if they're restrictive because I haven't used them extensively myself, but I know what you're saying.


Aww, thanks, it really does help to know you care.:) See, its not that i want to change my hair all that drastically, its just the little things that get me. I have brown hair, it just likes to highlight in the sun so easily and goes lighter, i have thick hair, I just liked to absue it for 4 years with heat and not enough trims, i could have long hair (it is just shy of BSL now, i have had it maybe 3 inches past BSL but it was breaking from damage not getting trimed, that was the longest i have had my hair, and it is often depressing to be stuck at this length because of past mistakes in hair care), but again, i have the damage to deal with and not a lot of patience. I mean really, if some one sees my hair, they see thick, wavy long dark hair, i see damaged poofy hair that is far too short. I could easily have the hair i want, but i need to except it will take time. I think i also need to except i already have most of what i want, i just find the need to torture myself with trying to achieve perfection even Piper doesn't have with a billion stylists. My problems boil down to more mental ones, but i am trying, really i am. Nearly loosing my curls to damage and too much protein and breakage for months has taught me not to fight them, i might brush them into soft waves and try to get them straighter while air drying, but i will always appreciate the volume i get with them now. I no longer touch a flat iron because i have actually looked at Piper's hair closely, its not really that straight, its kinda wavy and moves and is healthy, which my hair will be none of if i had kept straightening it. I will proabably continue to dye my hair because i like the color so much on me, even if Piper's hair isn't always this dark, when it is i like it on both of us, lol (i watch the show alot, can you tell?) So although my natural color may not be getting darker any time soon, it sure isn't getting any lighter unless by too much time in the sun, and although my hair isn't getting straighter, neither is Holly Marie Comb's without the help of a bunch of other people. Sadly, i just have me to try and replicate and create a similar look, but thats ok, i think i can do it. :) I hope you find peace with yourself and your hair issues, may i do the same, even if that means changing it a bit.

[terylenerose]

Aww, thanks, it really does help to know you care.:) See, its not that i want to change my hair all that drastically, its just the little things that get me. I have brown hair, it just likes to highlight in the sun so easily and goes lighter, i have thick hair, I just liked to absue it for 4 years with heat and not enough trims, i could have long hair (it is just shy of BSL now, i have had it maybe 3 inches past BSL but it was breaking from damage not getting trimed, that was the longest i have had my hair, and it is often depressing to be stuck at this length because of past mistakes in hair care), but again, i have the damage to deal with and not a lot of patience. I mean really, if some one sees my hair, they see thick, wavy long dark hair, i see damaged poofy hair that is far too short. I could easily have the hair i want, but i need to except it will take time. I think i also need to except i already have most of what i want, i just find the need to torture myself with trying to achieve perfection even Piper doesn't have with a billion stylists. My problems boil down to more mental ones, but i am trying, really i am. Nearly loosing my curls to damage and too much protein and breakage for months has taught me not to fight them, i might brush them into soft waves and try to get them straighter while air drying, but i will always appreciate the volume i get with them now. I no longer touch a flat iron because i have actually looked at Piper's hair closely, its not really that straight, its kinda wavy and moves and is healthy, which my hair will be none of if i had kept straightening it. I will proabably continue to dye my hair because i like the color so much on me, even if Piper's hair isn't always this dark, when it is i like it on both of us, lol (i watch the show alot, can you tell?) So although my natural color may not be getting darker any time soon, it sure isn't getting any lighter unless by too much time in the sun, and although my hair isn't getting straighter, neither is Holly Marie Comb's without the help of a bunch of other people. Sadly, i just have me to try and replicate and create a similar look, but thats ok, i think i can do it. :) I hope you find peace with yourself and your hair issues, may i do the same, even if that means changing it a bit.
You're welcome. :) I hope you find peace too.
My hair highlights easily in the sun too, but I'm hoping I can solve that with WO and hats. They say dye takes less easily on hair when there's sebum in it, so it seems that sun highlights would also not happen as easily.
I am currently having curl issues. I am also trying to get my hair to curl, and it really seems like it curls when I want it straight and straightens when I want it to be curly. Sigh. It really does bother me to be a 1c/3a. I know that is not really my hairtype, but it really seems like it is sometimes because my hair can appear all those types on different days. I don't know if 3a curls straighten as easily as mine do - that's why I chose 2c/3a. I used to think it was hard to get my hair to straighten, but now I know it's just as hard to get it to curl. My hair does not want to settle on a hairtype. It never likes to do what I want either, especially when it's short(ish) like it is now. One of the reasons I am growing my hair is that is sticks out a lot when it's really short. The last cut I had would stick straight out, and I really didn't like that. This is what you have to deal with when you have curly thick hair.

[maborosi]

I have had a lot of issues with obsessing/fixating on certain things. I have severe, severe anxiety and depression, and my doctors were concerned that I may have developed OCD. But now, I am undergoing treatment and doing way, waaay better! :D

It used to be that when I got 'fixed' on something, it was always very negative and made me very, very sad and miserable. It was like a life-intruding thing, so it wasn't like I just thought about something all the time and had a positive experience with it.

A year ago, my hair was at about BSL, and I would be so sad every day- I just wanted it to grow and grow, and I got really depressed. But now, it's only a bob, and I just like to enjoy taking good care of my hair. It's now not so much of a saddening, depressing obsession as it is just a fun hobby-esque activity for me, kind of like how gardening or reading about animals is. It turned into something that made me sad into something fun and enjoyable.

I have to finish treatment before I can go out and get a job, which is what I intend to do, and I love LHC because it's my online chill-spot, much like how some people have Facebook. Unlike Facebook, though, I think LHC is a very nice, accommodating place. It can be triggering for some people, I would imagine.

You're not alone, though. I think a lot of people struggle with fixations/obsessions that really interfere with their lives.

~maborosi~