View Full Version : Hair Crisis! Opinions Please

December 27th, 2011, 07:06 PM
So my hair just passed chin length and while I guess I should be super excited I am really super bummed.

It just looks so yucky. It's fine and thin and just hangs there doing nothing. An inch or so (a month) ago it had some movement and some flippy waves that gave it volume but now it is really sad and I have this strong feeling that it's just going to get sadder and sadder the longer it gets.

I, of course, pay attention to everyone's hair when I am out and I pay especially close attention to people with my hair type (straightish, fine, thin). Most of the time I see beautiful hair and it is very inspiring. The other day, though, I saw a girl with my hair type and a similar face to mine (longish beaky nose, no chin, pretty eyes, though! :D) and her hair was lovely but the combination of the facial features and the long lanky (albeit healthy, silky and shiny) hair was really not very nice looking. :(

I have been thinking about it a lot. And this poor woman has no idea her picture is permanently imprinted in my brain causing me sadness.. but it's there and I have a little chant going on in my head, "Chop it! It will look better, you will feel better!"

:( I really want long hair for a lot of reasons but I don't want to look/feel sad and dorky. I was really counting on my waves to stop it from looking limp and bodiless, but my waves slowly disappear the longer it gets.

Thank you for listening. :flower:

Also, I'd like some opinions on hair typing if you don't mind. My flippy waves, as I said, have mostly disappeared and I have no idea what to call it.

This is a proper hair typing picture- after clarifying and conditioning, completely air dried with no manipulation:

I don't like that it still looks wet and kind of stringy so I usually brush it out and it looks like this:

Please keep in mind that this is the waviest my hair ever gets. It flattens out the next day and doesn't come back until I clarify it again.

Thank you in advance for your input.

December 27th, 2011, 07:10 PM
Just looking at your photos I think it will look beautiful when it grows out (it looks great now too! I always wanted that exact haircut but my hair would never stay in place..)

December 27th, 2011, 07:11 PM
You are at a stage where you really cannot say what it will look like when it's long - just don't go comparing with what you see on other people and what may or may not be like you, cause there are 90% chances that you are wrong :D . I'd wait till it grows, and THEN if you don't like it, you could chop a much as you want. But no need to already worry now. Just wait and see !

December 27th, 2011, 07:13 PM
Oh wow, i don't think it looks thin at all! I would say it is about 1c before brushing. I would just grow it out, for all you know, the waves could come back with length. Try out thickening mousses, my friend uses the one by Got2b think its called fattastic, it is suposidly amazing. Try using pin curls or even rag curls as your hair grow. Also, a strengthing treatment of some sort might help. Please do not get discouraged! I have seen much finner and thinner hair then yours be WL or longer and look stunning and beautiful! You can do it!

December 27th, 2011, 07:13 PM
You don't have to be sad! :) I think you will look beautiful with long hair. You can always keep some bangs to frame your face if you don't like a flat look. Also, when it gets longer you will be able to curl it or make some loose waves with lots of methods you can searh for in this forum. They seem to really work even on the straightest hair! :)
Don't give up! :flower:

allnight avenue
December 27th, 2011, 07:19 PM
Your hair looks perfectly fine. Getting from chin-length to shoulder-length sucks for everyone - you're not the only person to have these doubts.

Here's how I got through that phase: If you can get it into a little stub of a ponytail, I would recommend wearing it "up" by pinning back the top and sides (6 bobby pins, if you get my drift) in a cute manner and then putting the back into the little ponytail. If you can't yet, just pin back the top and sides.

I know this advice might seem oddly specific but I've seen a lot of girls grow out too-short cuts that way and the way you pin it can make it look like you have a lot more hair than you do.

Granted, this also might not at all be how you want your hair to look, but for me it gave me a lot of self-confidence for about 6 months until my hair was longer. Once it's longer, if you still think it's "just hanging there," you'll be able to cut some layers into it to give it more movement. You're going to look lovely with long hair, don't ever doubt it.

December 27th, 2011, 07:20 PM
Your hair is really pretty and thick. I don't think it looks wet or flat or stringy or anything like that. If it's bugging you, try just not thinking about it for a while? Our appearance isn't everything. I notice you describe yourself as "beaky nose, no chin" don't be so tough on yourself! I don't have a strong jawline either and I spent quite a few years wishing it was different, but it actually is pretty just the way it is, and same for you too. Your hair is in perfectly good condition and I don't think you have anything huge to worry about here!

There are things you can do to encourage wave and body as it grows out. Many people find that conditioner-only brings out their wave pattern. Avoiding products with -cones in them also brings more wave. Properly moisturized hair will retain the wave longer than a single day. I do pin curls on a regular basis because they create a strong curl pattern my hair would not otherwise have.

Also a lot of people report not being able to see their wave pattern until the hair is much longer, this is called a long wave pattern.

I always thought my hair was straight with a slight flip to the end until I stopped using shampoo and started using oils as leave-in conditioners. Now my hair is quite wavy with distinct S-shape waves in it. So don't give up hope.

December 27th, 2011, 07:22 PM
Please don't give up on long hair. Your hair is very similar to mine, and the length you're at now is so awkward but it does get better. My hair seemed to get straighter and flatter until it hit shoulder length, but then suddenly my waves had room to form and it became fuller and sort of bouncy. It will definitely get better, and with the waves that you have, your hair won't end up stuck-to-your-head flat. Even if it does, updos are amazing for creating root lift without heat. :)

Hang in there. :)

December 27th, 2011, 07:23 PM
I wouldn't give up on it yet!!! My hair had a similar pattern. Growing hair is a test of human endurance and will power.... "Be. the. hair"!

Can you find a cute style or toy that will help you through this stage??

December 27th, 2011, 07:25 PM
I know someone who would have the same face description that you gave and her hair looks lovely long. I think you should try it.

December 27th, 2011, 07:31 PM
I agree with all the other posts, OP. You will look lovely with long hair. Don't let this awkward stage discourage you. I also don't think your hair looks thin. At all.

I think you will also suit long hair, especially long hair that is up. I have similar features to you (nose, chin) and I look good with my hair up. So don't despair. When you get past this stage you will be so glad you persevered :flower:

December 27th, 2011, 07:34 PM
I agree with above; you are being your worst critic. I think that you may have more wave than you think. It looks to me like your hair is getting ready to wave back in the other direction, but it doesn't have enough length to do that yet. Hang in there!

Here's my hair at about your length:
This was completely natural washed and air-dried hair. I was thinking YIKES! The longer it gets, the bushier it gets, except for that weird flat area right on top. It's hideous! The urge to keep it short was very strong.

I'm very glad that I gritted my teeth and toughed out that extremely awkward phase. I think you will be glad, too.

December 27th, 2011, 07:35 PM
I think your hair is lovely, and that it will be lovely when it grows.

And I have heard that bangs can help add symmetry to a face with a long nose, so there are options.

December 27th, 2011, 07:42 PM
Keep going! You're being very hard on yourself. Chin length was very awkward on me, and just drew attention to my jawline (I'm not a fan of mine, either). Shoulder length was much kinder, if you can tough it out that far. :)

I'd put your hairtype at 2a, ish. There's a lot of movement in there, and I bet with some more length, you'd have gorgeous s-waves appearing left, right, and centre. :D

December 27th, 2011, 07:58 PM
I think your hair looks good and I think you are very pretty. You will never really know how it will look until it grows. We are usually tougher on ourselves then others see us. My sister has a similar hair type to you, she has sucess scrunching aloe in her hair. It brings out the waves, soft and shiney! Hang in there:)

December 27th, 2011, 08:04 PM
You look different than the woman you saw- who can judge if long hair will look that way on you? You have to grow it out to see- then decide. Then at least you will know, and can say you tried it... Be strong!

December 27th, 2011, 08:05 PM
Oh, and P.S. - don't be afraid of a little trim. In my early years of growing, I had a teeny-tiny trim (1/4 to 1/2 inch) every 6-8 weeks. You don't need one that often - I let my hair stylist set my schedule - but sometimes nipping off some of those fastest growing hairs gives you a more polished appearance and helps you hang in there longer.

December 27th, 2011, 08:13 PM
Cut it if you want. But you're in the most awkward length phase right now, and if you can suck it up and deal, this too shall pass. Regardless, it's just hair, don't let it get you down or control your happiness.

December 27th, 2011, 08:14 PM
I think your hair looks good but if you want to encourage more of your natural wave I have a few suggestions. Many wavies with fine hair need to do protein treatments to bring out their waves you can buy various ones online and a poster on naturally curly created a really popular recipe that many people find works wonders (http://scienceyhairblog.blogspot.com/p/recipes-and-projects.html).

I had a similar problem where my hair looked more messy than wavy when I let it air dry (why I spent so many years using a straitening iron and hair dryer). My waves became actual waves when I started following the curly girl method. I cut out sulfates, rinse with cold water for better clumping and scrunch in product (for me jessicurl really works). I also plop my hair to dry and this may be useful when your hair gets a little longer.

December 27th, 2011, 08:32 PM
Thank you everyone! I'll take some time to respond to you all individually but I just wanted to add some more pictures for comparison,

I took a picture of my hair right now (OK five minutes ago), to give you an idea of how flat it gets. This is less than 24 hours after the pictures in the original post. It will keep getting flatter and flatter until at last at the end of the week it looks like someone just painted on my bald head. LOL (this may be an exaggeration)


From the front. (Mug shot!)

December 27th, 2011, 08:34 PM
Oh Gosh you should see my hair to know how lucky you are :), at least your hair is very healthy now, the length that you have is very weird, no one looks good with such length unless you are in a movie star and pay $35,000/day for your hair stylist (was that what jennifer Aniston paid?, lol) and unless they stuck 10 lb of gel, hair colors, some fake hair extensions to name a few to let that hair length looks ok.
You have amazing face, very beautiful rosy skin and great eyes, why not forget about your hair for the next 6 month (well that what I'm doing now, lol, after taking my extensions that I was doing every 8 weeks for $1200 for the last 8 years, you do the calculations and see how my hair stylist got so rich from me !), forget your hair now, just go about doing your healthy hair regime every day, concentrate on your beautiful face, more eye make up and eye shadows, get some hair accessories or put your hair up and back and show your face, concentrate on your face/make up/clothes for now, forget the hair, give yourself some 6 months to see how you like it, I have a feeling your hair will look amazing when it hits the shoulder or below shoulder length :magic:

December 27th, 2011, 08:54 PM
I agree with spidermom, you may have more wave than you think.

We have similar hair types.. From my personal experience, when my hair was about chin length it didn't show much wave at all. I usually kept it combed or brushed. As I got closer to shoulder length, it started to wave quite a bit more.

Give your hair a chance. You never know what may happen. :flower:

December 27th, 2011, 08:56 PM
Your hair does not look yucky, nor you do have a long beakish nose and you do not look like you have no chin! Please don't be so harsh on yourself, goodness woman, you are an attractive lady. :flower:

I always giggle when people say that their hair *just hangs there* and I always think....*what's it supposed to do? a song and a dance? It's hair!*

Your hair is just at that awkward stage, I went through it and it is frustrating. It will get better as time passes on and it gets a chance to grow and get some shape. For what it's worth, I think it looks fine and does not look yucky in any way.

December 27th, 2011, 09:08 PM
Congratulations, your hair crisis has brought me out of my lurking to finally write something around here...my first post! (and I lurked without an account a couple of years ago). Maybe you should try clip in hair extensions? That way you can see what your hair would look like long. And if you really like it, keep them in until your hair grows to a less "awkward" length...

December 27th, 2011, 09:14 PM
FWIW, as another member said, it is difficult to know what your hair will look like once it is longer than you've had it before.

I also have thin/fine hair, but it didn't look at all how I expected it to when it was long. (I grew to classic a few years back, though it is shoulder-length now.)

December 27th, 2011, 09:28 PM
Aerin- Thank you! I wish my hair would maybe move a little bit out of place once in a while, sometimes I feel like I'm wearing a helmet.

slz- Comparing is one of those things that I know I really shouldn't do but I can't help it. Usually it is more inspiring than depressing. I think I might have been looking for negative things (usually I am very positive) because I'm angsty about where my hair is at right now. I agree the best thing to do is wait. Waiting is hard, though, especially since I don't really have a goal in mind.

Hollyfire- I don't think it looks thin in those pictures either. Honestly they are very flattering and are probably the best that my hair looks. Still, though, I know it is not thin to the point of looking unhealthy. I just think some more volume at the roots is much more flattering for my face, and I thought my wispy waves were so romantic and I loved them and now I am lonesome without them. lol Thank you for the product rec, I'll keep it in mind. I have a very minimalist routine though and I don't think I'm looking to add more product to it.

Martukita- I am really looking forward to bun waves! I am also looking forward to putting it all in a pony so I can figure out exactly how quantitatively thin it is or isn't. I will try not to be sad! Thank you for the compliment.

allnight avenue- This is my first awkward phase, the mullet and the flippy wings were fine but this is just the worst! I wasn't expecting it to feel this bad, or to have such intense scissor itch. I am going to persevere, though, because I am very curious about whether my waves will come back. I'll keep the style recs in mind for special occasions but pins everyday is bad for my fragile hair. I want to try pin curls some time, though, I bet it would be amazing. :)

coffinhert- Thank you :) I do love the color and the shine of my hair. There are many things about it that I do like. Don't get me wrong about the nose or the chin (or the elf ears that you can see in my mug shot, either), I love them and I'd never change them. I do think, though, that part of embracing all of your features means knowing what is flattering and what isn't. I don't think my hair right now is particularly flattering. I now feel like it's not necessarily going to stay that way, though. Thank you again.

Cloelia- :joy: That there is hope my waves will return!!! I am going to hug you a million times, thank you for sharing your experience. I'm not giving up!

akuamoonmaui- I am so over the moon to hear of multiple stories of waves coming back and I no longer feel like I am doomed to lankiness forever. Maybe even if they don't though, I can learn to appreciate it for what it is.

December 27th, 2011, 09:31 PM
I'm sorry, I don't mean to make light of your hair crisis but I read this as "Hair Crisis! Onions Please".. for a moment I thought the LHC was going to a new level of food-on-hair crazyness. :silly:

I definitely agree with everyone who said that you should wait it out and see, though. It's much too soon to give up!

I always think awkward stages are a great time to experiment with styling. When I kept my hair shoulder length and even a bit shorter I hated how it looked "just laying flat", so I did all kinds of experiments with pincurls, foam curls, braidwaves(made many little tiny braids), etc. My hairtype actually seems pretty similar to yours, though, and I'm finding that as it's growing- currently APL- I'm definitely liking my natural hair type more and more as time goes on.

So, don't give up! Wait it out and experiment with it. You might find some way to make the growing out process more fun and thus reduce the urge to chop.

December 27th, 2011, 09:34 PM
You are at an awkward stage right now and you just have to power through it. Buy some cute new hairtoys and learn some new ways to clip it up or back. I know it's hard; I've struggled with my own fine, limp hair and the best thing to do is distract yourself with new hair toys/products until you get over the hump.
I get that you think long might not look better than shorter(I'm struggling with that myself), but you owe it to yourself to get there and see!
I liked the suggestion of clip on extensions to see if you like the long look, or even trying cheap long hair wig.

Dark Rapunzel
December 27th, 2011, 09:36 PM
I had my hair cut to BSL when I was 15 (and it was gorgeous and long before - about waist), and I hated the way it fell over my back and made me look a lot younger. Instead of waiting to let it grow out, I had it cut again, to shoulder, and then AGAIN to chin. It was the worst lack of patience mistake I have ever made, because I look back and realize I would be at thigh length now instead of tailbone. I stuck it out, though and I'm really happy I did. I think you should take the chance, but maybe pinning it away from your face with pretty bobby pins would change it up a little? Experiment with your short hair, you can do a lot with it, contrary to popular belief (I'm not saying on TLHC, just in general). Good luck! xxx

December 27th, 2011, 09:40 PM
novemberfoxtrot- Thank you. I am going to try it. :D

Lissandria- Thank you for the encouragement! I happen to think a high cinnabun would look very graceful on me. Maybe that should be my goal.

spidermom- I hope you are right. :) I am going to stick it out and see how it looks once it gets past shoulder. I haven't thought about trims yet because it's not long enough for me to do it myself so I haven't really thought of a plan yet. I know it's going to need trims, it's very fine and fragile and individual strands taper at the ends. I agree that a trim will keep it looking fresh enough to keep growing it. Thank you :)

tinywife- I will try a fringe later on but I am waiting for it to be long enough to put it all up first. :)

pepperminttea- Thank you thank you!! :) I think I will keep my hair stats where they are. I wish there was a 1b-2a option, though. :D

PrairieRose- Thank you so much for the compliment. I don't usually get so down on myself and the encouragement is very helpful.

December 27th, 2011, 09:42 PM
I think your hair looks thick and lovely. You are being way too harsh on yourself. I also think you will get more of a wave pattern as your hair grows longer. You should let your hair grow longer and see how it looks. From your current point of view I'm betting you'll be surprised by how a little length can create movement and make your hair even prettier than it already is. :)

December 27th, 2011, 09:47 PM
My hair was always wavy when it was longer but when I cut it to shoulder length it became straight for a while, and now at APL it's wavy again. Maybe it just needs to grow more. Also when I stopped using cones and sulfates my hair got a lot thicker. I hope I helped! :)

December 27th, 2011, 10:08 PM
Amber_Maiden- You are right, of course. :) Thank you.

Kherome-"Suck it up and deal," pretty much sums it up.:)

ellisbell- Thank you. I've been thinking about trying protein for a while and now I'm convinced I should. :D

beachgirlla- Thank you. I do appreciate that my hair is healthy, and I'm glad I've got a good starting point. I am lucky in that. Thank you for the reminder. :)

battles- :joy: I do hope so. Thank you! I also love your new avatar.

gretchen_hair- Thank you, I suppose "yucky" is very subjective. :D I'm glad not everyone thinks it is, that's for sure! And thank you for the compliment. I don't want it to do a song and dance, I just like some movement and volume around my face because I think it is more flattering. I have hope now that it might be more flattering as it grows.

December 27th, 2011, 10:12 PM
Like Savfairy said, when I stopped using Sulfates and Cones my hair felt thicker as well. And proper haircuts when my hair starts getting split ends always made it look good. This may be helpful to you: http://www.ehow.com/way_5299239_nettle-hair-growth.html

December 27th, 2011, 10:21 PM
miissmonmon- Welcome! I'm so glad you posted. :) Extensions aren't for me for a couple reasons but I appreciate the advice.

Dvips- Thank you! It is worth a lot. :) My dream hair is classic length, I never thought I would ever be able to have hair that long. Your story is inspiring.

Arashi- LOL!! I think people have tried onions before, too! Thank you for the encouragement. I'm not really into "styles" I am very bare-bones when it comes to beauty stuff. I will stick it out, though! :)

Lostsoule- Thank you so much for the kind words! I've never thought of my hair as thick. I have memories of my mother scolding me for "plastering" my hair to my head and I tried my best to convince her it was just naturally like that but she thought it was the way I washed or brushed it. She used to sneak up behind me with a hair pick and start trying to "fluff" it out. LOL She still does that some times. Geez I wonder where the insecurity comes from!! Maybe it's not as thin as I think it is. :)

savfairy- You did help. I am cone and sulfate free but I've been considering trying cones just for the protective qualities because my hair doesn't much like oils and I can't use them as a leave in. Instead I think I'm just going to try some protein and some moisture. :)

December 27th, 2011, 10:23 PM
Please don't chop yet. This was my HARDEST part of growing when I was growing out I understand exactly how you feel. Pin it up in a pony tail so you don't have to see it and keep it that way until you are happy with it when it's down. That's how I was from chin to shoulder.

December 27th, 2011, 10:25 PM
P.S: You might try a little mousse at the roots, hang your head toward the floor and hit them with a cool blow-dryer for a few minutes. This will give you a bit more volume. Then straighten up and scrunch for a few more minutes while using the dryer. If you have one.

December 27th, 2011, 10:47 PM
As someone else said, you won't know what it will look like until it gets there. You may love it and if not, it is an easy enough fix. Try a few things before giving up. My wavy hair looks best with layers, for instance. You might have to play around a bit to figure it out.

I find that my hair pulled straight back makes my round face look rounder. A few face framing layers make me look much better. You may well find that doing something similar is the difference between a merely okay look and a flattering look. GL!

December 27th, 2011, 10:57 PM
P.S: You might try a little mousse at the roots, hang your head toward the floor and hit them with a cool blow-dryer for a few minutes. This will give you a bit more volume. Then straighten up and scrunch for a few more minutes while using the dryer. If you have one.
I think that's a good suggestion. Also, is clarifying every day out of the question? If you like your hair best on Day 1, why not make every day a Day 1. Washing isn't such a hassle at that length.

December 27th, 2011, 11:08 PM
You really can't tell at this stage how it will look when it's longer. Stick it out and then chop it back if it truly doesn't suit you. On the plus side, at least you know for a fact that you look lovely with short hair, so it's not a terrible consolation prize. Also, if you do decide to grow it out and stick it out, since short hair looks so good on you, updos are likely to also be exceedingly flattering on you (something I envy!) In fact, I think a loose-in-the-front updo will look very classic and English on you!

December 27th, 2011, 11:30 PM
I REALLY think you should keep growing it out, at least give it a chance! Seriously, your hair can turn out very differently from how you expect when it actually grows out, especially if you're taking care of it extremely well. I experienced this over the past couple years- my hair was a tiny boy-short pixie and it was very thin, dull, unmanageable, rough...Two years later, I now have some hair to APL (with some shorter layers :P), and taking care of it, it is often soft, supple, voluminous and thick, looks great without any styling necessary...just have faith that if you do the right things, you're hair will sort itself out :D Also, I think the weight of hair growth can transform it's appearance in surprising ways.
As for hair typing, I would venture to guess 2a. However it's always difficult to tell on short hair!

Give your lovely hairs a chance to show their true potential!

December 27th, 2011, 11:35 PM
-playful swat- hush. Its pretty. I like it.

The color is so cute too. :P

December 27th, 2011, 11:43 PM
I've seen your pics several times around LHC, and I've always thought you looked artistic - like a poet or a dancer - you have a beautiful, wistful quality to your face, and your hair frames it quite nicely right now - how have you managed to look so pretty at such a typically awkward length?


I would keep growing it - each new length will be an adventure.

December 28th, 2011, 01:13 AM
I think it is just weird feeling for you that it's getting longer than usually!
Especially if it's one of the awkward stages! Hold on...don't judge it yet!
We have same hair type...I think I know what you're talking about...some days it's wavy and full of volume and so silky fine and shiny....and sometimes it just appears flat, lifeless, fragile..
Everyone got good and bad hair days and even periods..

Long hair is about being patient and dedicated! And I think it will look lovely long and suit your face! It's a journey and an adventure...
Besides, if it really won't make you happy...chopping is always an option..

Hmm, I also had this problem...about letting it grow past hip. As soon as it reached length I wasn't used to, I had this feeling like something is wrong and it felt normal to cut it.
Once you get passed that...in your mind, it will be all different!

December 28th, 2011, 01:19 AM
Well, you probably will look dorky and sad if you feel dorky and sad. I say, do what you feel comfortable with, and you will look comfortable and beautiful. Nothing looks as good as confidence! :flower:

December 28th, 2011, 01:24 AM
I replied to your post in the thin/fine hair thread yesterday, but I'll some of my own pics just for you to compare.

Here is my hair about a year ago when it was in a short, kind of shaggy bob. You can see that it is not curly in the least, it's sort of flat and you can see my scalp. It measured an i, nowhere near a ii.



If you check out my hair album, you will see my length shots. My hair is now a solid ii, it's got WAY more wave, the longer it gets the wavier it gets. Also, the weight of my hair has lead to more scalp coverage. When it's short the hair just bounces up too much.

Looking at my hair short, you'd never be able to guess that it would look the way it looks now.


Hang in there and wait until at least shoulder to APL to really be able to judge what you will look like with longer hair.

December 28th, 2011, 02:11 AM
Ah I really feel you, I mean I feel the same way about my hair! :( For me, that was one of the reasons I never grew my hair out in the last 5 years. I always thought it would look too flat and thin. But my hair seems to get thicker the longer it gets! You still have layers, like I have too.. I think it will be less 'flat' when they catch up. That being said, your hair looks nice! To me, it doesn't look thin at all :)

But my waves seem to disappear as well.. and then all of a sudden they come back! Are you cone-free? That really helps me with my volume and waves! And when it's longer you can put it up!

I'd say, just grow it out and see how it behaves. I think your hair could really surprise you :) My hair looks a lot like yours, but in the past it was so thick when it was 'long'! (about APL) I think our hair will grow out thicker then we expect :)

December 28th, 2011, 02:17 AM
I think you're lovely and I think you need to give your hair a chance. Once it gets longer you will have so many hair options, including cutting it. Have some patience now, it will pay off in the long run.

December 28th, 2011, 02:22 AM
I felt like playing around on my graphics program, here's the result. ;)

Personally, I think you're gorgeous! You look lovely with short hair and will look just as lovely if not more with long hair. Stick it out, I think it'll be worth it! :)

December 28th, 2011, 03:51 AM
I feel your pain, my hair is the same length as yours at current and is the same texture/density.. I think we're hair twins, though I'm naturally dark brown in hair color. Whether this makes you feel better or not, and I hope it does, but I think your hair is really pretty, but I've always hated my hair. Since our hair is really very very similar, seeing your hair and how it gets flat, really makes me appreciate my hair more because it also does the same thing, going flat not long after clarifying. We are our own worst critics, I hate the way my hair looks most days, but I think yours is gorgeous... see what's wrong with this picture? I don't know it's late and I'm probably not making my point as well as I should.

I think you will look great with longer hair and as some who has had their hair past BSL I will tell you that our texture/density looks really pretty the longer it gets, you might have to have some layers put in at the ends to keep movement in it depending on how you want to style it, but your hair will look great! I had a lot of damage in mine and I still to this day look at pictures of when it was long and think it was pretty, imagine how much more satisfied I will be now that it's healthy and growing too!

It's an awkward stage chin-shoulder, I'm right there with ya. I can barely make a pony stub, but I always just throw it halfway up out of my face and bobby pin it back away from my face as much as I can to get through the "my hair looks like poo" days. Good luck getting through the abyss! Just keep with it!

December 28th, 2011, 04:19 AM
I was very surprised to read how you describe your face, I think you are very attractive.
As for your hair, it doesn't look thin to me, and is a lovely colour. :cool:
I think maybe you're just being down on yourself.
My hair is very thick, and I always wish it were thinner. We can always find fault with ourselves, and don't I know it:rolleyes:
Hang in there. Maybe see how you feel about your hair once a month, and the rest of the time, try to avoid thinking about it.

December 28th, 2011, 05:13 AM
you are a very pretty young woman with beautiful, regular features. You will look like a Renaissance madonna with longer hair. It will look stunning on you.

Your hair is not thin at all. It looks healthy, and the colour is beautiful.

I'm no specialist for waves but it's very possible that your wave patterns need a certain length to come out to play.

You are at the moment in the most awkward stage of the long hair journey. It's difficult to make the transition from styled short hair to "just hanging there" long hair... because you can't do any of the things yet that only long hair can do.

Don't lose heart now. If you really want to have long hair, why sacrifice your growth? You will only find yourself at the same point a few months from now. get it over and done with now.

Let it grow. Continue to treat it well, and just wait what happens. Put in some cute hairtoys, and let it grow. I'm sure that after a few months, everything will be different.

Every length has its challenges but none is more difficult than the one you are at now.

I'm really curious how you will look in a year or two....

December 28th, 2011, 05:24 AM
I think you're just going through an awkward stage of growing. It looks fine to me. Your hair looks very soft, healthy, and you have a great colour. It doesn't look thin to me.

December 28th, 2011, 05:30 AM
I think your hair is lovely as well. As another person already suggested, if your hair looks better on wash day, why not wash daily? I have fine hair and an oily scalp and I wash daily. I usually CO, with a regular S&C thrown in there when my hair starts feeling too lanky. I have been on this site for years and tried stretching washes many times because it's what you "should" do. The bottom line is, not everyone benefits from stretched washes. I see no sense in putting up with lank hair and greasy roots. I think your hair DOES appear fuller just after washing, so to me, the solution is a simple one.

As for the waves, don't worry. I never knew mine even existed when I was your length. You may be surprised once you get a bit longer. ;)

December 28th, 2011, 07:42 AM
hi! I know we've spoken on another thread. You and I have VERY similar hair types. My hair can be flat sometimes and it can be very wavy sometimes, but it's so fine that it's downright ethereal, and it's thinner than average, which means it CAN end up looking flat.

but I just want to say that:

1. I hear you! That's the sort of thing I know I will be facing when my hair reaches that stage (probably by some time in the spring when more of my pixie layers get to chin length)

2. I've found that the worst stage IS between chin and shoulder. Things look awkward and flat. Best advice is to put it up as much as possible. And when it's shoulder length (maybe even before? There are methods to put more waves in the hair (and more body) like with rag curls and braiding at night).

3. Your hair looks healthy. I think you should give it a chance, at least until shoulder length and see how you feel.

Oh gosh, I completely sympathize because I'm at the worst awkward stage ever right now. I can't even put my hair up and out of sight right now. It's horrible. Headbands have been my best friends right now, and even so...it's so bad.

And I just want to say that I love how supportive people have been to your post. It makes ME feel better about my hair and my hair type.

December 28th, 2011, 07:42 AM
I wish I could respond individually to everyone because you've all been so kind and helpful! I am in a rush, though, so I will settle for a quick THANK YOU!! to everyone. :flower:

On a couple of points,
I do wash my hair daily. I have to because if I don't I get scalp acne. I currently do CWC, CO doesn't work because of my scalp issue and also I find too much conditioner and no shampoo weighs my hair down.

I've only considered daily clarifying in passing. It seems like it would help it look nice but I would rather it look limp than cause it damage, and I feel like daily clarifying might cause some damage. Also, most clarifying shampoos and conditioners marketed for daily washing have cones in them. I was looking through old pictures from when my hair was shoulder length (it was straight then, no waves, before I had my baby), and it looked the best when I was using Neutrogena Clean S&C, which is a daily clarifying system with cones. Although it looked great I am wary about trying it again because most advice here is to stay away from cones and strong detergents. I wonder whether it looked great but was suffering some damage.

@Kira- An extra thank you for you for taking the time to do that with my pictures! Very cool stuff, by the way.

My initial reaction to the first picture you did with the hair down was, "Nooooooo!!! :(:(" But everyone else says it looks nice so I gave it another chance. If I cross my eyes a bit to blur it and pretend like it's not my face I do think it looks lovely. I think this is more a psychological issue than a hair issue. Thank you for giving me the chance to see that.

The last time I had my hair long was a very sad point in my life and I gained a lot of confidence from cutting it. Every time I see my own face (or someone with a similar face) with long hair it looks really depressing to me but now I realize that it is a mind trick and to most people it looks nice.

This has all been very helpful. Thank you again.

Just for the record, I don't think I am unattractive and I am quite fond of my face and all of it's features. I like the beaky nose, it looks Grecian to me and the chin is soft and feminine. I don't want to give the impression that I go around criticizing myself all the time because I've really grown to appreciate the way I look and it took a long time to get to that point. That having been said, I am pleasantly surprised at how many kind and wonderful compliments I have received and am truly happy about that. :):):)

If I can be kind to myself about the way I look with short hair, I should be able to do the same with it long. I am so grateful and lucky that the LHC is here and there are so many nice and helpful people who give me encouragement and remind me of this!


December 28th, 2011, 07:53 AM
I agree with everyone here, give it some time.

My hair was just like that when I was growing out the pixie. It was very frustrating! I just got it cut into a chin line bob to get all the layers out and I'm alot happier having it all (nearly) one length! Once you get it past your chin, I think you'll be happier with it.

I used to take the bang/side portions, roll them like a french twist (only with one lock of hair) and pin it that way. It looked nice and kept me from getting annoyed at the length and growing bangs.

Hope this helps! :)

December 28th, 2011, 09:29 AM
There are a LOT of people who use both sulfates and cones here, quite happily. Cones do not cause damage. Some of the cheaper brands of clarifying shampoos and conditioners do not have cones. (Honestly, I was unaware that most clarifying conditioners DID have cones. That's new to me.) As far as a recommendation for S&C, have you tried the Garnier Triple Nutrition? A lot of us fineys have great success with it. Just throwing some ideas. :)

December 28th, 2011, 10:00 AM
Never ever judge your hair by how other people's hair looks. I think your hair's color and texture are beautiful! Give it a chance to grow and it may surprise you how lovely it will be. :)

December 30th, 2011, 09:40 PM
Hello, everyone! Just a quick update in case anyone is still subbing this thread..

I found the cure for my awkward phase blues!! Caruso rollers! I got them today and had so much fun! I haven't had this much fun with my hair in a long long time.

Here are some preiminary results:

Thank you very much to everyone for the encouragement, and a special thanks to UltraBella for her helpful advice about the rollers. :flower:

December 30th, 2011, 10:25 PM
I think it looks wonderful. I am thrilled they worked for you :D

Just wanted to add, since I am not sure which direction you are putting in the rollers, if you use large rollers and wrap the hair back, away from your face, it will give you some volume. And you can experiment with using larger or smaller rollers at the crown for lift and volume.

December 30th, 2011, 10:48 PM
Hello, everyone! Just a quick update in case anyone is still subbing this thread..

I found the cure for my awkward phase blues!! Caruso rollers! I got them today and had so much fun! I haven't had this much fun with my hair in a long long time.

Here are some preiminary results:

Thank you very much to everyone for the encouragement, and a special thanks to UltraBella for her helpful advice about the rollers. :flower:

They look lovely, and you have such amazing Grecian features. Jealous! :D

December 30th, 2011, 11:00 PM
I think it looks wonderful. I am thrilled they worked for you :D

Just wanted to add, since I am not sure which direction you are putting in the rollers, if you use large rollers and wrap the hair back, away from your face, it will give you some volume. And you can experiment with using larger or smaller rollers at the crown for lift and volume.

Thanks! That's the first time I did it. I put the rollers in away from the face. The largest rollers that stay in my hair are mediums. I can get my longest hairs in the jumbo ones but then the short layers just slip right out.

The best waves came out of the small+ rollers but I ran out of those and started using mediums on the under layer and that's where it started to get a little iffy. I should probably use the mediums on top and the smaller ones underneath since that's how my waves go naturally.

I am going to keep experimenting but so far I am very pleased with the results!

December 31st, 2011, 09:22 AM
That's super! I had a friend who first told me about the molecular steam rollers years ago. Her hair was your length or a little longer, and it was very fine. She got great results from them. (They didn't do much for me because my hair is dense and curl-resistant, and unlike some hair types, moisture removes any curl from my hair.) I'm glad you found something to help you enjoy your hair during this phase.

December 31st, 2011, 09:41 AM
Your hair looks lovely. It would be cute if you would get some really small foam rollers and roll it up. Give it volume and you say your hair needs shine I think it has plenty of shine.

December 31st, 2011, 10:49 AM
I missed this thread.

Your hair does not look thin to me either, at all. I think it looks fantastic with the roller set.

I think you should continue to grow it and experiment with routines and products. You can always cut it shorter if you prefer a certain length. That is the fun part of the journey, discovering what length you really prefer.

Long hair to me has advantages. One of them is that you can make your hair look shorter by wearing it up in certain styles, while preserving the length, that can look great too.

There are a number of lengths and ways to enjoy long hair different to what you may have worn in the past.

December 31st, 2011, 11:15 AM
Oooh I love the look you got with the rollers, wish I had been a bit more adventurous during my awkward growing out phase years ago, I had full-on triangle hair lol flat on top & bushy at the ends! Keep playing with styles & enjoy your hair, at least you have the benefit of growing out your hair armed with all the fantastic LHC knowlege! So many of us here have long hair that is damaged due to treating it badly without realising it :)

December 31st, 2011, 11:30 AM
I think your hair is beautiful and will be gorgeous when it's long you have natural waves like i do :p

December 31st, 2011, 11:47 AM
I read the thread, and I'm honestly going to say I prefer the long hair edited photo better. You remind me a lot of the women portrayed by pre-Raphaelites (waterhouse mostly). Look up pre-raphaelite on google images. Those women had long hair.

I think you are on a pretty awkward stage. I am with Spidermom, my hair looks like that at your current length so you are quite lucky your hair behaves!

I understand feeling liberated by a cut, but long hair can also be liberating. I kept on dying and cutting my hair when I was emotional, and when I got pregnant I decided I wanted my hair to represent what I am living and going through. It's a symbol of my long term relationships.

Maybe thinking of it this way can help to deal with this phase. The awkward phase was horrible for me.

ETA: you reminded me of this (http://www.pre-raphaelitesociety.org/img/martyr_sm.jpg) type of beauty, just with straight hair! when your hair is this long, the rollers will make it nice and bouncy!

December 31st, 2011, 05:57 PM
Your hair is very similar to mine and I hated this length too but hang in there it does get better. My hair used to sort of feather at the ends at this length and I couldn't wait for it to get to a length I could put it up. You could get some small jaw clips, twist the back in sections and wear it up, that would help you forget about it, while it grows. Also experiment with deep conditioning's, I also think as it grows you will see more wave.

Don't trim it at all until you can get it up in a pony, by March you will be in a different territory with your hair and by summer you will be well on your way! I still get frustrations at every goal I meet but there normally short lived! your hair is healthy and its growing, enjoy it at every stage!

ETA- yes your hair is fine, but it looks thicker than a i/ii .

December 31st, 2011, 06:09 PM
Hello, everyone! Just a quick update in case anyone is still subbing this thread..

I found the cure for my awkward phase blues!! Caruso rollers! I got them today and had so much fun! I haven't had this much fun with my hair in a long long time.

Here are some preiminary results:

Thank you very much to everyone for the encouragement, and a special thanks to UltraBella for her helpful advice about the rollers. :flower:

looks really pretty, now your getting into the swing of it!

December 31st, 2011, 06:33 PM
You could be my BFF's twin, I wish I could post a picture of her so you could see what I mean. Her hair is a bit thinner than your's though, and really pretty. We made a deal to grow our hair out together a few year's ago, and she has beautiful hair at any length. She just cut her's off a few month's ago to chin length and is growing her's out again. Just give it time and you will see what every one else see's.