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View Full Version : What bad/ugly hair comments have you received?



Anisaa
December 17th, 2011, 09:32 PM
I would like to share a horrible hair comment that I received today from a friend whom I hadn't seen since a year ago. She told me that my hair was too long and that I look much OLDER. She suggested that I cut it because it ages me! I explained to her that I was going to let it grow about 4 more inches (tailbone length) and then just maintain it. She nodded her head and told me that I looked like a native americans (I took that as a compliment!) however I know she did not meant that comment as a compliment. I was just SHOCKED and :mad:.
I worked very hard to maintain my hair and I am proud of it, but to hear from a friend that I have not seen for a year say that long hair ages me was completely discouraging for me!! I felt old and ugly...
I would LOVE to read about your ugly/bad hair comments.. Happy Holidays to everyone!!!

Miss Catrina
December 17th, 2011, 09:36 PM
Lovely how she managed to be racist on top of being rude. Apparently native americans look old??

Hollyfire3
December 17th, 2011, 11:39 PM
I've had people tell me anything from why don't yo just straighten it to your hair isn't thick, its frizzy (oh yeah, you wanna try putting it into a ponytail?) This type of stuff hurst my feelings for a second then i think about how wrong the person who said it is and move on without a second thought.

doro357
December 18th, 2011, 12:07 AM
I've been told I was too old and too short to have long hair.

vdhendrix
December 18th, 2011, 12:49 AM
ive received many, the most recent was when i visited a friends house and their uncle told me i needed a trim, when i used to work at wal-mart a woman asked me "where do you get your hair trimmed" and when i told her she said something like "well you need to stop going there because their doing an awful job" she then said "my hair used to be as long as yous but it looked alot better", but its all good because i get way more positive comments about it then negative

Callque
December 18th, 2011, 02:48 AM
I'm sorry that happened, but it sounds to me like the random malice you received was probably from a source of jealousy. ;)

Native American hair is gorgeous. She probably just doesn't like it since it isn't short, dyed, blowfried, and heat-styled every day. My grandfather and I were grocery shopping together one day and he randomly blurted out, "Your ends need a trim. They're starting to look raggedy." I was hoping that no one noticed how bad they were, but if a man who normally doesn't say much about your appearance suddenly notices your ends... you probably need a trim. I did trim, and my ends look much better now. Plus, I haven't had any comments from the grandfather lately either. :p

Callque
December 18th, 2011, 02:50 AM
Double post.

vampodrama
December 18th, 2011, 03:11 AM
Last week I had my hair in a braid at work. A co-worker, who is annoying to begin with, creeped behind my back, lifted up my braid and shrieked happily all over the office "Mousetail!!!"

Yeah, I know my hair is thin and my braid looks tiny and pathetic. No need to be so happy about it. :mad:

Moor_tu_lyfe
December 18th, 2011, 05:34 AM
OMG I can't believe how rude and insensitive people can be! My hair is only just past BSL, and never really been longer then waist (yet!) so I haven't really been "on the radar" yet for hair comments.

I did try WO for a few months, did all the recommendations (preening, scritching, BBB etc) and finally got my hair to look fairly OK with it (not fabulous, but starting to be able to wear it down and not feel self-conscious) when my DH tells me in no uncertain terms that my head smells bad... this is after the greasy stage! No amount of WO washing, vinegar rinses etc helped. He was just being honest- and I did ask- although I guess it certainly counts as a bad hair comment. :p

Luckily soapnuts seem to work really well for me, and my husband says I no longer smell bad!

jacqueline101
December 18th, 2011, 06:59 AM
Mine was recent I've been away from this person for about four years he asked me what happen to my little cute shag hair cut.

Madora
December 18th, 2011, 07:14 AM
Years ago, while attending outdoor services at Yosemite, someone behind me whispered to someone else "Cousin Itt!". Didn't bother me a bit because I always thought Cousin Itt had beautiful hair!

To the original poster, your "friend" is sorely lacking in social skills, not to mention appreciating other cultures. Her remark about Native Americans was rude and insensitive.

girlcat36
December 18th, 2011, 07:18 AM
I was introducing my sister to an older man who was a friend of mine(and also a really BAD hairdresser), and he said, "It's easy to see who got the good hair in the family!" Meaning--not me.

Anisaa
December 18th, 2011, 08:15 AM
WOW!!! Thank YOU for posting your bad hair comments..Reading your comments made me realize what an IMPACT long hair makes on people especially in today's society. After it is past a "certain acceptable" length, people do NOT know how to respond to you or classify you. They start "insulting" you, making rude comments and associating you with some LONG HAIR freaks such as cousin "IT" or OLD because back in the older ages people had very LONG hair.

But anyways, it is just THEIR OPINION....and in life the only opinion that should matter is YOURS, as long as you love your hair, and you are happy with it and yourself, the rest of the people can criticize as much as they want.

Anisaa
December 18th, 2011, 08:18 AM
I agree with you for a second they hurt your feelings and make you doubt your own beauty...But, like you put it we need to move ON...

Aeris
December 18th, 2011, 08:25 AM
I can't recall any mean comments about my hair itself, but once when I had my hair up in a cinnabun with a hairstick, I overheard this conversation behind me:

Girl 1: "What is that in that girl's hair?"
Girl 2: "I don't know, but it's way too big. Weird."

I'll take a wild guess and assume that it was me they were talking about. It shouldn't have been that big of a deal for me, but I haven't worn a hairstick in public since. I'm really sensitive to comments about my appearance.

Amber_Maiden
December 18th, 2011, 08:44 AM
That I should like a serious honours student and get it cut. That mom's should have shorter hair.

airmid
December 18th, 2011, 09:02 AM
A very close relative used to always say how her hair was longer/nicer/prettier/healthier than mine... not too mean I guess but really not true and very annoying.
High school was bad... but then, I did some crazy things to my hair in high school and it was to be expected. I got called a "man" a lot when I shaved my head... I think I've honestly blocked a lot of the comments out, and good riddance to them!!

wtchmel
December 18th, 2011, 09:17 AM
Wow, this type of thread never ceases to amaze me. I just can't imagine it. I've never had anyone say negative things (to my face) about my hair. I suppose it's because i'm very tall, and fat and unapproachable, and they're probably afraid to. lol Just the way i like it. I think it's been said before in other similar threads, but a good response to rude comments of this sort is " i'm not here to beautify your world"
Good luck to everyone who experiences this.

Tsopana
December 18th, 2011, 09:24 AM
Years ago, while attending outdoor services at Yosemite, someone behind me whispered to someone else "Cousin Itt!". Didn't bother me a bit because I always thought Cousin Itt had beautiful hair!

To the original poster, your "friend" is sorely lacking in social skills, not to mention appreciating other cultures. Her remark about Native Americans was rude and insensitive.

You're damn right cousin Itt has beautiful hair!
;)

Orangerthanred
December 18th, 2011, 10:50 AM
"Your hair is WAY too thick! Straighten it!"

It's like saying "Your feet are too wide! Bind them!" or "Your eyelashes are too short! Get fake ones!"

pepperminttea
December 18th, 2011, 10:56 AM
In high school, after years of wishing my hair was curly, I got a perm. I was still adapting to it, and I'd blow-dried with a diffuser and mousse, the best thing I knew at the time. I was kinda happy with it, until a boy said it looked like "rat tails." He was generally a bit of a snotball though.

When I tried WO, the transition stage never really ended for me. A few months in, a friend asked if my hair was wet, when she knew perfectly well it wasn't, and the look on her face was worse than anything she could have said. Needless to say I gave up on WO a few weeks later.

Purdy Bear
December 18th, 2011, 11:15 AM
Oh Iv had loads here are some:

Your repugnent - as a child I think he ment repunzel.

You have n*gg** hair.

You need a perm, it cut, a nice bob might do.

Oh its baldie

Oh and the most memorable from a dermatologist when I was a teenager - you have alopecia just live with it, and oh stop the tears they wont work on me. I later found out that there were numerous treatments that I could have been given but wasnt by the particular p**t.

catnip
December 18th, 2011, 11:47 AM
OMG you have so cute, THIN hair. And also: what colour is it? Red or brown? It's really weird and must be dyed! Or: why they are so long? When are you going to cut them?
It's really annoying, but I try to ignore negative comments.

spidermom
December 18th, 2011, 11:49 AM
My father told me my hair looked "like a big mess" and suggested I cut it. But last time he commented, he said it was "kind of pretty".

catnip
December 18th, 2011, 11:52 AM
Och, and my mom used to call me witch because of the lengh

Pazita!
December 18th, 2011, 04:21 PM
I cut my own hair (layers too), the first time I did it I follow this tutorial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pyo7DXKT3lg
The girl straightens her hair before she cuts it, I avoid this step.

Pazita!
December 18th, 2011, 04:23 PM
I cut my own hair (layers too), the first time I did it I follow this tutorial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pyo7DXKT3lg
The girl straightens her hair before she cuts it, I avoid this step.
I'm so sorry I didn't mean to post this here.

MissManda
December 18th, 2011, 05:36 PM
"The only way your hair will ever look good if you use [volumizing] product in it." Who are you to decide what is attractive and what is not?

"Your hair will look so stringy at waist length." Uh, no it doesn't. ;)

:disgust:

mzBANGBANG
December 18th, 2011, 05:39 PM
My negative comment was actually kind of lucky, because it got me to much better hair today.

The guy I was seeing at the time was pointing out women with beautiful hair and I asked him how mine was. He said it was nothing special, and when I teared up, he tried to take it back, "No, I mean it's nice..." Yeah, that relationship didn't work out.

He was right, it just sucked hearing it like that. I had shoulder length, dyed black hair at the time. Now, I have BSL natural blond hair that feels like silk, and a boyfriend that loves me and my hair!

Tia2010
December 18th, 2011, 06:59 PM
I had some when I was younger after a unfortunate incident involving bleach and 80's style hair :p But since I started growing it I haven't really had any comments. My hair isn't in the "really long" category yet, so people tend not to notice it.

Well, I did have one comment but not a big/mean one...I had someone tell me they loved the blond pixie I use to wear, it looked so good and I should really do that again... But we were talking about our old hairstyles at the time, so she didn't just drop it out of the blue to be hurtful.

ludwig20
December 18th, 2011, 07:03 PM
In sixth grade, girls would often say rude things like, "Don't you brush your hair?" or "You need to comb your hair."

I did, of course. But back then, my ponytail was probably at 6 inches, frizzier, and longer. No matter how much I brushed, it looked big and messy. :(

Hollyfire3
December 18th, 2011, 07:37 PM
In sixth grade, girls would often say rude things like, "Don't you brush your hair?" or "You need to comb your hair."

I did, of course. But back then, my ponytail was probably at 6 inches, frizzier, and longer. No matter how much I brushed, it looked big and messy. :(


Oh wow, i get that too, my hair just bushes up under humidity, or in general. Well...lately it has been proteined to bad crunchyness and other horrible things but, ususally, it is as you describe.

Piyo
December 18th, 2011, 08:07 PM
Good grief, I can't believe some of the harsh things some of you have had to deal with. And whats with all these people flat out saying "my hair is/was better/prettier/healthier than yours" WHO DOES THAT?

My hair is barely waist length, so I don't think it attracts enough attention, but I had a coworker tell me I should cut my hair because I Just let it "hang there." I'm sure other people have said things behind my back, because my hair looks very tangly a lot of times.

becks113
December 18th, 2011, 10:50 PM
I've gotten all kinds of rude comments. I had purple hair a few months ago & an older lady at Walmart came up to me & said, "Your hair makes you look like a nasty heroin addict. You're a dirty lowlife & you won't achieve anything with hair like that." I don't understand what makes people think being so incredibly rude & hurtful is acceptable..

Aeris
December 18th, 2011, 11:00 PM
I've gotten all kinds of rude comments. I had purple hair a few months ago & an older lady at Walmart came up to me & said, "Your hair makes you look like a nasty heroin addict. You're a dirty lowlife & you won't achieve anything with hair like that." I don't understand what makes people think being so incredibly rude & hurtful is acceptable..

Geez! This I can't believe at all, especially from a stranger..I would have had no idea how to respond to such harshness. That was incredibly mean of her.

ArienEllariel
December 18th, 2011, 11:50 PM
I've gotten all kinds of rude comments. I had purple hair a few months ago & an older lady at Walmart came up to me & said, "Your hair makes you look like a nasty heroin addict. You're a dirty lowlife & you won't achieve anything with hair like that." I don't understand what makes people think being so incredibly rude & hurtful is acceptable..

Wow that's completely uncalled for. While I'll admit that unnatural hair colors (in the sense that they don't grow naturally out of your head) seem to be associated with risky/wreckless/rebelious behavior among some, that in no way equates to "dirty lowlife/nasty heroin addict" as that woman so lovingly *insert sarcasm here* put it. You continue to dye your hair whatever color you want and prove people wrong who might associate it with nonachieving low lives. *hug*

heidi.maryke
December 18th, 2011, 11:55 PM
In primary school, a couple of boys called me "grandma" referring to my natural dark ash blonde hair. So I pretty much coloured my hair after that, thinking my natural colour left more to be desired. Now, I'm happy with my natural colour and can't wait for all the bleach damage to be cut out in a couple of weeks.. weeee!!

lolot
December 18th, 2011, 11:55 PM
once a girl told her friends "omg she is so disgusting, and look at he hair, its horrible, not like my hair that is really pretty" :( and she continue talking about my cloths and humilliated me as long as she could, i think i met the devil that time, ive never seen so much cruelty in a person like that time

zsepthenne
December 19th, 2011, 12:39 AM
Gosh that's terrible! I'm sorry ((()))
My mom just tells me I look like a school marm with my bun. I also wear glasses. Heehee

ArienEllariel
December 19th, 2011, 01:30 AM
Gosh that's terrible! I'm sorry ((()))
My mom just tells me I look like a school marm with my bun. I also wear glasses. Heehee

I got "you look like an English teacher" (but in a good way) from one of my friends. I was wearing glasses at the time. I think the combination of glasses and a bun tend to make people think of stereotypes.

Anisaa
December 19th, 2011, 06:02 PM
WOW!!! reading these comments is shocking! It is just HAIR your OWN HAIR..why do people have to be so negative about your HAIR LENGTH DECISION or COLOR as a matter of fact. They have their own hair to do whatever they please with it!

Copasetic
December 19th, 2011, 06:13 PM
I haven't had very many, but I find it pretty rude when people tell me I should straighten my hair more often.

JessiBird89
December 19th, 2011, 06:19 PM
When my long hair was riddled with highlights and was so damaged that it looked frizzy if it wasnt flat-ironed (such a vicious circle) my mother used to say that it looked terrible if I let it airdry and that I had to cut off my straggling ends. She was probably right but it still hurt!

ludwig20
December 23rd, 2011, 04:07 PM
Oh wow, i get that too, my hair just bushes up under humidity, or in general. Well...lately it has been proteined to bad crunchyness and other horrible things but, ususally, it is as you describe.

lol yeah, my hair hasn't changed all that much. It still has a bad case of frizzies and bushiness (particularly the back). But that's just my texture and I can't do much about my genes!

giuditta
December 24th, 2011, 04:57 AM
Just as I was really liking my hair lately (it is almost shoulder length and I'm so happy with it) a coworker mentioned "yeah you are really in an awkward stage with your hair aren't you, where it really looks bad at an in between lenght". WTH? I looked in the mirror 200 times that day but to me it still looks good.
She also mentions that half ups make me look too posh. I love my flexi's and the fact that I am able to do half ups with them, call me Posh Spice from now on then if you want :taz:

BTW she has gorgeous long thick shiny asian hair, which makes the whole story worse for me argh haha :rolleyes:

Unofficial_Rose
December 24th, 2011, 05:39 AM
No-one's ever been rude about my hair. Which is odd, because my hair is a bit crap. Especially when compared to others on this thread. :confused:

auburntressed
December 24th, 2011, 06:19 AM
Most recently, the only person I know who would even dream of making a negative comment about my hair has been my mother. She said, on her most recent visit to me, "Wow, your hair is really thinning out, isn't it?" I was like... um... excuse me? As far as I can tell, my hair is as thick as it's ever been (never measured my ponytale as a child/teen, so I can't say for certain; but it certainly hasn't thinned enough for me to notice). The only major difference from the last time she has seen me is that, thanks to henna, my hair no longer suffers from the hideous frizz that it used to get all the time. It is sleeker and shinier. I guess she mistakes frizz for thickness?

Also, over the past ten years, every single time I have seen my mother, she'll either claim that I must have cut my hair, because it is so much shorter than the last time she saw me (usually when I haven't trimmed in ages). Or else she'll comment on how I've grown it so much longer now (usually after a fairly decent sized trim).

When I was a teenager in high school, the other kids were always making rude comments about my hair. For some reason, they absolutely could not STAND the fact that I had long hair. They were constantly berating me for not cutting it. One time, a boy set my hair on fire. There were more than a few times when I had to dodge quickly to avoid a malicious kid with a pair of scissors who was trying to chop it off when they thought I wasn't looking. I was perplexed by the hostility toward my hair. I had never been in an environment before where people not only did not compliment my hair, but they actively hated it and let me know they hated it. To this day, I haven't had such experiences since that time either, thank God. I really still can't fathom what the problem was with my high school. It was a very conservative Baptist school, so you'd think from that alone that long hair would have been considered acceptable. But for some reason, they were just absolutely vicious toward me.

wicked kisses
December 24th, 2011, 06:49 AM
The last time I received a comment about my hair that was hurtful, someone said I looked like a 'Gibson Girl' and he meant not just my hair, but my figure. I have always had a very curvaceous figure, and my hair is very 'Gibson-ish'.
I took it as an insult, but looking back I realize that it only hurt because I thought it was meant that way.
Now I realize that, although I still look the same(But older) I look pretty damned good. Finally getting my hair to bush out a little less.

Diamond.Eyes
December 24th, 2011, 04:53 PM
I've been called a "fire-crotch" by girls who were obviously jealous. It doesn't effect me though. I don't see it as a bad thing that the only thing a person has to "insult" me with is stating that I'm a natural redhead. I also think they are quite strange for bringing up the color of someone else's body hair. It really makes them look like a creep. :laugh: Other than a few instances like that, people who attempt to insult me about my hair are basically nonexistant in my life.

Zefyra
December 24th, 2011, 05:45 PM
I havent had many comments, though my hair is short right now (Cut 6 inches about 2 months ago, due to damage) Although just last week one of my customers saidd "Ill never understand why women dye their hair. It never looks as attractive to men as the natural colour." (Im a natural ash blonde with faded black over faded red hair).... I was just baffled by it because, yes, natural hair often does look better, but who is he to say what I would look more attractive as.. And for the record DH loves my hair almost as much as I do...

kristib123
December 24th, 2011, 05:48 PM
I think the worst I have received was that due to my age I should have shorter hair. About 3 yrs ago when my hair was at least BSL I heard that so much that I finally did cut it to chin length and then magically "I looked SO MUCH younger"!? :confused: Truth be told the whole thing that got me wanting to grow my hair long again was seeing a much older women with the most gorgeous silver mane at least TB on a walking path I go to often. I saw her a few days in a row and just fell in love with that gorgeous hair I knew I had to grow mine back out :D

blondie9912
December 24th, 2011, 06:33 PM
One of my friends with long blunt cut black hair down to her hips looked at me the other day, cocked her head, and said, "You *****ed up your hair so bad, it was gorgeous before. It's so short and the colour is awful, and you have that short piece in front." Thanks Jess! I totally didn't realize, and you're making me feel so much better :doh:

And I can't forget the ever-popular "Your hair is SOOOOOO thin" whenever I wear my hair in a ponytail. Yes, I've gone through a pretty bad shed due to dying my hair too much this past summer, but really people, keep it to yourselves.

Hollyfire3
December 24th, 2011, 07:40 PM
lol yeah, my hair hasn't changed all that much. It still has a bad case of frizzies and bushiness (particularly the back). But that's just my texture and I can't do much about my genes!


Yeah i agree, its funny cause my mom has fine, blonde hair that forms nice, cute waves...how the heck did i get stuck with THIS mess i always wonder....

candycandace
December 24th, 2011, 09:23 PM
I've been called a "fire-crotch" by girls who were obviously jealous. It doesn't effect me though. I don't see it as a bad thing that the only thing a person has to "insult" me with is stating that I'm a natural redhead. I also think they are quite strange for bringing up the color of someone else's body hair. It really makes them look like a creep. :laugh: Other than a few instances like that, people who attempt to insult me about my hair are basically nonexistant in my life.
That's how I feel too :shrug:. No one really insults my hair these days.

Anisaa
December 29th, 2011, 04:40 PM
Thank you ladies for sharing, I see that as hair gets longer peoples need to comment on it GROWS! But reading all your comments made me realize that we can NEVER please everyone, except ourselves, so as long as we <3 our hair the way it is, is the only thing that can matter.

KwaveT
December 30th, 2011, 08:52 PM
I did have a customer that asked me if my hair has ever seen a comb? I said if has seen plenty of comb since I spend 10-15 minutes on it every morning. After I said this and mentioned that what he was noticing was that I was growing my hair long. Out came the hippie references from him. I am sorry but I don't look like a hippy. I try make my hair look neat despite some problems with flyaway hair at times. When are we as a society are going to stop associating men growing long hair with hippies and rebellion. I don't believe in wild look anyway. I like my hair to look neat for a lack of better word. I have had a couple other customers mention this to me too.

Mrs. D
December 30th, 2011, 10:01 PM
What a turkey.

darklyndsea
December 30th, 2011, 10:51 PM
(about my cinnabun) "Oh, that actually looks nice."

Meaning what, that my hair looks like **** the rest of the time? I get that it was meant as a compliment, but...

Elenna
December 30th, 2011, 11:15 PM
People are opinionated just about anything because they've nothing to say that's of any subtance. They say,"Oh your hair is long." Like I didn't know it!!! Or they say, "Why do you have long hair?" Like I have to explain it to them!!!! Their real meaning is that they don't think that I should have long hair. I wish that they'd keep their opinions to themselves.

I'd like to do a Greta Garbo, I want to be left alone.

gogirlanime
December 30th, 2011, 11:18 PM
I said, "Wow that girl's hair color is perfect I'm always trying to get that perfect red [I'm a red head now]" my co-worker says, "I think that's the first time I've heard someone be jealous of a red head" so I said, "really???" and she goes, "yeah, people wanna be blonde around here" (of course she's a blonde). I concluded in my head that it's because the city I live in now is full of cowboys and blondes and I'm used to the city people that like ravens and red heads. It was kind of an indirect bad comment saying that her hair color is better than mine :rolleyes:

holothuroidea
December 30th, 2011, 11:39 PM
My hair isn't long enough to be worth comment. I have had multiple people tell me I look "like a dude," though. I think that's mostly from having semi-short hair and no make up. Fine, you think I look like a dude. Dudes are cool, too. :cool:

This was when I was younger and had no kids, though.


I havent had many comments, though my hair is short right now (Cut 6 inches about 2 months ago, due to damage) Although just last week one of my customers saidd "Ill never understand why women dye their hair. It never looks as attractive to men as the natural colour." (Im a natural ash blonde with faded black over faded red hair).... I was just baffled by it because, yes, natural hair often does look better, but who is he to say what I would look more attractive as.. And for the record DH loves my hair almost as much as I do...

That comment is nauseating to me. The assumption is that women only ever do anything because it is attractive to men. Is this person living in a world where the only opinions that matter belong to males? And then that the only opinions males have about females is whether or not they are attracted to them? That's just sad and weird on so many levels.

UltraBella
December 31st, 2011, 12:37 AM
No one has ever said anything negative to my face, but two years ago - while at my uncle's funeral - I found out that my crazy Aunt Francis had told everyone that I have hair extensions. Luckily everyone knows she is crazy, and everyone knows I have had long hair most of my life. It still bugged me.

gogirlanime
December 31st, 2011, 12:44 AM
No one has ever said anything negative to my face, but two years ago - while at my uncle's funeral - I found out that my crazy Aunt Francis had told everyone that I have hair extensions. Luckily everyone knows she is crazy, and everyone knows I have had long hair most of my life. It still bugged me.

It's cuz your hair is so thick and gorgeous, these days thats rare so many assume they are extensions. I'm not agreeing with them, but you see my point you know. I LOVE your hair

woolyleprechaun
December 31st, 2011, 01:46 AM
My DH said to me, a long time ago 'erm, you could do with doing something with that' when I was brushing my hair one night......He was probably right (It was dyed, straightened and pretty ruined, even though it was just past shoulder lenght) but it still cut me pretty deep :(

Bene
December 31st, 2011, 02:11 AM
I don't understand why the Cousin Itt comments are bad. It's more descriptive than a judgement. People use similes and metaphors all the time, it's part of general communication. There aren't many long haired icons, and The Addams Family was popular, so of course Cousin Itt would come to mind.

Cania
December 31st, 2011, 02:20 AM
Hm.. maybe she meant the texture of Native American hair? I think it's usually quite coarse and straight, isn't it? (Which from your hair typing on here I might be wrong about XD)
Either way I'd take it as a compliment too, their hair is generally quite stunning.

What a nasty person. Please try not to let it get to you, I think everyone on here has had nasty comments at some point and they're usually all the same. We can't all have fugly hair surely? :P


ETA: Just the other week a male "friend" was going on about how my hair was too long. Luckily another stuck up for me - he was just annoyed because I'd won a debate earlier (we're both entering for Law in university next year and he hasn't won one yet so I think it shakes his confidence). People know you care about your hair and dig at it to get to you, I think.

auburntressed
December 31st, 2011, 02:30 AM
I had someone ask me the other day if I would ever cut my hair.

It was not meant in a mean way, but it gave me pause. It had been a long time since I'd been asked if I would ever cut my hair, but it's something people use to ask me all the time. I feel like it is an ignorant question, personally. Obviously, I have long hair because I want to have long hair. It takes time and patience to get long hair, so where is the assumption that I'm just biding my time, itching to cut it off?

THAT SAME DAY, I came home from work and my roommate started telling me that I need to donate my hair because there are children with cancer who don't have any. And how can I have long hair with a clear conscience when my selfishness is depriving those poor children? Like... basically, she made it sound like the only possible reason anyone should ever allow their hair to get long is so that you can give it away - and if you don't donate it, you are stealing from sick children. I've heard that crap before, too, but again - that was the first time in a while.

I wonder what it is that makes people think it is okay to try to guilt people into cutting their hair because some sick child might be bald?

- I haven't heard this one directed at me, but I often hear people asking girls who have beautifully curly hair, "Do you ever brush your hair?" And typically, they ask it in a way that sounds ... a bit more negative than simple curiosity. As if they are implying that obviously, it looks unkempt.

- I also sometimes have people ask me how often I wash my hair, and I can never figure out if they think my hair looks greasy or what. It doesn't seem like a normal question to say, "How often do you wash your hair?" We talk about stuff like that on this forum, but it's a forum for hair care. To me, asking someone if they ever brush their hair or how often they wash their hair is exactly the same as asking if someone showers daily or washes their hands after using the bathroom. It is like saying, "Do you REALLY observe basic personal hygiene, or are you faking?"

Audrey Horne
December 31st, 2011, 04:09 AM
A very popular "your hair is so thin". "Your braid looks like a carrot" long time ago. "I hope you cut back to pixie again, it suits you so well!" after I've said that I grow it all out. The nonsensical "your hair will not/does not grow".
Who cares what they say. They should mind their own business.

aster66
December 31st, 2011, 04:39 AM
THAT SAME DAY, I came home from work and my roommate started telling me that I need to donate my hair because there are children with cancer who don't have any. And how can I have long hair with a clear conscience when my selfishness is depriving those poor children? Like... basically, she made it sound like the only possible reason anyone should ever allow their hair to get long is so that you can give it away - and if you don't donate it, you are stealing from sick children. I've heard that crap before, too, but again - that was the first time in a while.

I wonder what it is that makes people think it is okay to try to guilt people into cutting their hair because some sick child might be bald?



I have had sort of the same thing happen to me once. Somebody from my class commented on my long hair and told me (after I got a 10 cm trim) that I should stop getting 10 cm trims and should wait longer so I could chop of 40 cm of so I could donate it. Apperently she tought that 10 cm trims were selfish and wasteful and that I was a horrible person for only thinking about myself. I didn't know how to respond to that, so I just kept my mouth shut and walked away.

naturegirl321
December 31st, 2011, 06:18 AM
I'm barely 5, 2 and I've been told it makes me look short. I just think they're jealous.

ChristyCheryl
December 31st, 2011, 06:29 AM
In middle school, a girl and her brother would talk about my hair, saying that I needed to straighten it, which I did everyday after and I wish I never did because it damaged my hair so bad... My brother used to talk about my hair being so thick and how it was weird to him, I got my hair thinned out and it has never grown back the same thickness, I miss it. I was told I had greasy hair often by this one girl, I guess I did then maybe as a middle school hair phase; she herself has greasy hair to this day. But because of her comments, I used shampoo more regularly than I should have, which made my scalp worse than it was to begin with, causing too much oil production and dandruff. Now I rarely even use shampoo because it dries my scalp and hair out. ATM, I'm a junior in HS, I haven't really gotten any insults, none that I can remember at least. But when a person tells me that they prefer my hair straight, I basically take it as an insult and start to dislike them because I feel that they don't really like the true me. It's a little extreme but I can't help it, I guess because of past experience. Now I never even wear my hair straight, I used to do it just to see how long it was but I didn't like the way it affected my hair. But this all helped me to learn not to take other peoples comments to heart and to just take care of myself the way that I am and do what pleases me. It saddens me that I did things not because I wanted to, but because of others unnecessary comments. I only surround myself with people who like me for me. If someone tries to be negative to me, I pretty much let them know that I never asked for their opinions and inform them that I don't take the time to tell them every negative thing I think about them, even though I'm sure there is plenty to say. ;) Then I forget about them from then on. :)

ChristyCheryl
December 31st, 2011, 06:45 AM
I would like to share a horrible hair comment that I received today from a friend whom I hadn't seen since a year ago. She told me that my hair was too long and that I look much OLDER. She suggested that I cut it because it ages me! I explained to her that I was going to let it grow about 4 more inches (tailbone length) and then just maintain it. She nodded her head and told me that I looked like a native americans (I took that as a compliment!) however I know she did not meant that comment as a compliment. I was just SHOCKED and :mad:.
I worked very hard to maintain my hair and I am proud of it, but to hear from a friend that I have not seen for a year say that long hair ages me was completely discouraging for me!! I felt old and ugly...
I would LOVE to read about your ugly/bad hair comments.. Happy Holidays to everyone!!!
That lady was rude and should keep her unnecessary comments to herself. Normally when people insult others it's because they have a lot of personal problems. Also, as I have a grandparent on each side that is Native American, you should definitely take this as a compliment, I would! Both my grandparents had beautiful hair through out their old age because it was thick, neither looked old either! My grandpa who was pure Hopi and Seminole had smooth skin and thick dark hair all his life.. It was something to be jealous of. So if she is associating Natives with looking old or having bad hair, she is wrong! And I'm sure your hair is beautiful if she compared it to Native hair. :)

lapushka
December 31st, 2011, 06:49 AM
I don't understand why the Cousin Itt comments are bad. It's more descriptive than a judgement. People use similes and metaphors all the time, it's part of general communication. There aren't many long haired icons, and The Addams Family was popular, so of course Cousin Itt would come to mind.

And of course people say that because Cousin Itt is... such a beautiful, happy creature, right?:p

Navydoc_76
December 31st, 2011, 07:17 AM
wow-i cant believe just how rude some of these comments (and their owners lol) are! i think everyone here has beautiful hair!

turtlelover
December 31st, 2011, 07:40 AM
I don't think I've had a hair insult since Junior High. I guess I'm lucky!!!! Yikes!!!!

Grillz
December 31st, 2011, 07:49 AM
My mom had let her hair grow to between APL-BSL recently. She has really nice red hair with big loose curls and loooooads of layers, so it often looks a little wild (but in a pretty good way). A couple years ago, my grandmother had cancer (in remission!), so she started getting magazines for wigs in the mail. She still gets them every few months and now, whenever she does, she hands them to my mother and says, "Here [mom]. There's a lot of nice hairdos in here." To which my mom responds, "What? Are you trying to tell me something?"AND MY GRANDMA SAYS YES lololol Gotta love the bluntness

xoerincolleen
December 31st, 2011, 10:02 AM
My dad has told me I'm too short for long hair. If he were to decide how my hair looked, it'd be in a perpetual bob (which is NOT flattering on me). Good thing it's MY hair :)

DreadfulWoman
December 31st, 2011, 12:17 PM
- I also sometimes have people ask me how often I wash my hair, and I can never figure out if they think my hair looks greasy or what. It doesn't seem like a normal question to say, "How often do you wash your hair?" We talk about stuff like that on this forum, but it's a forum for hair care. To me, asking someone if they ever brush their hair or how often they wash their hair is exactly the same as asking if someone showers daily or washes their hands after using the bathroom. It is like saying, "Do you REALLY observe basic personal hygiene, or are you faking?"

This. When I had dreadlocks I was constantly getting the 'how often do you wash it' and variations of, like 'How do you wash it' and 'Can you wash it.' It always struck me as being more nosy than anything, but yeah, a little accusatory too. I got in the habit of answering by saying 'with shampoo, how do you wash yours?' It always really surprised people to get their question turned around on them like that, and (I hope) gave them a sense of what an inappropriate thing it was to ask in the first place.

catarinalaree
December 31st, 2011, 12:23 PM
Every day I get told to straighten my hair. It has a kink to it and a lot of frizz but I do my best to keep it looking okay-ish and healthy. A friend of mine even teases me by telling me to touch her hair everyday (which is a lot softer than mine and she repeatedly used Sun-In to bleach it but her hair is fine and mine is coarse - there's bound to be a difference in texture.)

And then even boys make comments on how I should dye my roots, cos the difference makes me look "trampy". I ignore it all but sometimes I can't handle it and a few swear words are said and I flip the birdy plenty of times...

It's a shame so many people can be mean and/or ignorant and how they seem to obsess over something that's not theirs.

Hope y'all ignore anything bad said about your hair and remember everyone on the LHC has and will always have way more beautiful hair :)

nakmom
December 31st, 2011, 12:28 PM
I hennaed my hair the other day and was so excited about it until my dad told me it "looks really dull and boring". :( Everyone else really likes it, but his comment made me wonder if they all secretly think the same thing.

Jenw777
December 31st, 2011, 02:10 PM
I was in the grocery store one day and ran into a woman that used to work at my high school. We were catching up and she commented on how different my hair looked asked if I was over due for a cut (I had always kept it around my shoulders and blonde). I told her that no I was growing it to my bum.

Her reply: "Oh honey, it's ok, you still have a pretty face"

????????????? I'm still unsure how to take that.

leslissocool
December 31st, 2011, 02:17 PM
I was in the grocery store one day and ran into a woman that used to work at my high school. We were catching up and she commented on how different my hair looked asked if I was over due for a cut (I had always kept it around my shoulders and blonde). I told her that no I was growing it to my bum.

Her reply: "Oh honey, it's ok, you still have a pretty face"

????????????? I'm still unsure how to take that.

Whaaaaat???? that's crazy! I'd take it as an insult, gosh the nerve!

cheycheyeyes
December 31st, 2011, 02:38 PM
I get told by almost everybody everyday to straighten it and I'm like :hatchet:

ArienEllariel
January 1st, 2012, 11:01 AM
I'm barely 5, 2 and I've been told it makes me look short. I just think they're jealous.

I'm not 5'1" and I'm always going to look short, so I see no reason to "fake" being taller by avoiding long hair. I also have very short legs and a longer torso. Why should I try to hide or cover up something society sees as a flaw? I am what I am and I like me. :p

ArienEllariel
January 1st, 2012, 11:09 AM
I was in the grocery store one day and ran into a woman that used to work at my high school. We were catching up and she commented on how different my hair looked asked if I was over due for a cut (I had always kept it around my shoulders and blonde). I told her that no I was growing it to my bum.

Her reply: "Oh honey, it's ok, you still have a pretty face"

????????????? I'm still unsure how to take that.

I probably would have been shocked and said, "excuse me?" cause I wouldn't believe I'd heard her right. Seriously, what is with people nowadays?:rolleyes:

SwordWomanRiona
January 1st, 2012, 11:19 AM
I would like to share a horrible hair comment that I received today from a friend whom I hadn't seen since a year ago. She told me that my hair was too long and that I look much OLDER. She suggested that I cut it because it ages me! I explained to her that I was going to let it grow about 4 more inches (tailbone length) and then just maintain it. She nodded her head and told me that I looked like a native americans (I took that as a compliment!) however I know she did not meant that comment as a compliment. I was just SHOCKED and :mad:.
I worked very hard to maintain my hair and I am proud of it, but to hear from a friend that I have not seen for a year say that long hair ages me was completely discouraging for me!! I felt old and ugly...
I would LOVE to read about your ugly/bad hair comments.. Happy Holidays to everyone!!!

That's nonsense! I hate the "long hair makes you look older" stupid prejudice. It's not true! General statements are hardly ever true.
Forget about it. I'm sure your hair is gorgeous, and that you look gorgeous with it as well. A lot of people are anti-long-hair nowadays. They're just narrow-minded. Forget about them.
And I find Native Americans to be very beautiful, and to have beautiful hair as well. I would certainly take that as a compliment :).

About me...I've been told in university, more than once, that my hair is lank. I was rather hurt about that. It turns out the ones who told me that don't know the difference between "straight" and "lank", and they'll refuse to believe that the word "straight" is neutral, and the word "lank" is negative and pejorative, implying not-very-healthy hair that falls without flow and without shine...These kind of comments actually made me feel bad about my hair being straight for a long time, until I found LHC and began to see that straight hair "can" be beautiful too, and not "lank and boring"!

I also received some not-too-kind airy comments about my hair not being as thick as that of other people close by (and thus, worse), and a very rude, obscene comment about my hair when it was tailbone-to-classic length while at school. That made me furious, but I chose to ignore the git.

SwordWomanRiona
January 1st, 2012, 11:25 AM
I was in the grocery store one day and ran into a woman that used to work at my high school. We were catching up and she commented on how different my hair looked asked if I was over due for a cut (I had always kept it around my shoulders and blonde). I told her that no I was growing it to my bum.

Her reply: "Oh honey, it's ok, you still have a pretty face"

????????????? I'm still unsure how to take that.

:mad::mad: What's with people, indeed! That's so rude!!

Cjatje
January 1st, 2012, 11:27 AM
Yesterday I'vz got one, my sister
Ent it in a bad way, but really I just take it as a compliment...
'sis, your hair is just too soft! I can hardly braid it?!' ::roll::
She has very curly hair she straightens every single day (she's 13years old!!!) and she fries it every day with her hairdryer...
Last night she asked my mother for a permanent straightening?!
Well, I'm happy with my ubersoft and slippery hair, I can braid it andut it in a french twist, ponytail, flip,... So that's good enough for me...
And then my mum said 'you hair looks just so healthy and shiny :D ok, not a bad comment qi guess? :p

SwordWomanRiona
January 1st, 2012, 11:33 AM
That comment is nauseating to me. The assumption is that women only ever do anything because it is attractive to men. Is this person living in a world where the only opinions that matter belong to males? And then that the only opinions males have about females is whether or not they are attracted to them? That's just sad and weird on so many levels.

Hear, hear!! :thumbsup: I agree!! I've been sometimes told things like "Why don't you cut your hair, such long hair isn't that sexy" and patriarchal things like that. My response is usually a mix of :steam and:wigtongue.

dulce
January 1st, 2012, 12:33 PM
Isn't it ironic,the saying "long hair makes you look old,"then when you're my age you get told,"you're too old for long hair,it makes you look like you're trying to be a teenager".So what is it society?It shows there is a prejudice against long hair at any age in this society by some people.It really doesn't make sense does it.It's such a contradiction.So do what you like and ignore any negativity.

Long_hair_bear
January 1st, 2012, 12:40 PM
Screw those people is what I say! They need to learn to mind their own business. Long hair is beautiful and rare and I would kill for some of you alls hair lengths. I've never really gotten any comments as I'm only at MBL for the moment, but it disgusts me that you all have.dont ever cut your hair! I did and now seriously regret it.

Serendipitym0m
January 1st, 2012, 12:48 PM
I had a bully in school who announced in front of all my classmates and teacher that she didn't like my hair because it was so thick! I thought it was ironic since she had thin, burnt out, and processed hair.

I've also heard "boy.. your hair is getting so long.." which was said in a disapproving way.

But just to hear my 7 year old son tell his friends and cousins how his mom has beautiful, long, flowing hair just beats out whatever negative comment I hear out there :)

ArienEllariel
January 2nd, 2012, 01:39 AM
I had a bully in school who announced in front of all my classmates and teacher that she didn't like my hair because it was so thick! I thought it was ironic since she had thin, burnt out, and processed hair.

I've also heard "boy.. your hair is getting so long.." which was said in a disapproving way.

But just to hear my 7 year old son tell his friends and cousins how his mom has beautiful, long, flowing hair just beats out whatever negative comment I hear out there :)

Aww that's so sweet. :)

HintOfMint
January 3rd, 2012, 06:03 AM
I had straightened my hair for a semi formal event, and a girl said, "Oh with your hair straight, people can finally see how tiny and skinny you actually are!"

... so... I look chubby most days? Not that there's anything wrong with chubby, it's just that she meant tiny and skinny as a good thing.

the.fee.fairy
January 3rd, 2012, 06:32 AM
My best friend tells me all the time that she wants to straighten my hair.
It is dead straight. There is a slight kink on the under layers, but the top layers are dead straight. They cannot get any straighter...

What is the obsession with straightening all hair?

duchesswannabe
January 3rd, 2012, 06:40 AM
What is the obsession with straightening all hair?

This too shall pass. In the 80's it was all about the curl. Fashion, shmashion.

the.fee.fairy
January 3rd, 2012, 06:48 AM
I can't wait for it to pass! I'm sick of people saying my dead straight hair would look better if i straightened it!

Indyanna
January 3rd, 2012, 01:09 PM
My sister and nephew gave me a hard time about the length of my hair over Christmas. When I told my sister that I thought my hair looked pretty, she answered, "Well, yeah if you were 20." She believes a woman over 40 should not have long hair. I am 54 and I guess I should know better. If I thought cutting my hair would make me look younger, I'd shave it. Alas, that is not the case so I am going to grow it to my waist and let the world make fun of me. I might just throw the world off its axis and start wearing white shoes after labor day too. :grnbiggri

ArienEllariel
January 3rd, 2012, 01:19 PM
My sister and nephew gave me a hard time about the length of my hair over Christmas. When I told my sister that I thought my hair looked pretty, she answered, "Well, yeah if you were 20." She believes a woman over 40 should not have long hair. I am 54 and I guess I should know better. If I thought cutting my hair would make me look younger, I'd shave it. Alas, that is not the case so I am going to grow it to my waist and let the world make fun of me. I might just throw the world off its axis and start wearing white shoes after labor day too. :grnbiggri

lol there's a lot of that going on in the world sadly. Good for you that you'll wear your hair how YOU like it. And white shoes after labor day? why not? :)

Kumiko033
January 3rd, 2012, 01:26 PM
All the hairdressers that touched my hair always had this comment "Do you want us to thin your hair out" and they already grab those dang scissors x.x.

I've had them have their way ONCE..biggest.mistake.EVER.

First I always thought thick hair was a bad thing because of people like that, now I know I'm a lucky b*st*rd for having thick curls!

I also bought my own scissors last week, no soul other then mine will be touching my hair from now on :) .

Long_hair_bear
January 3rd, 2012, 01:30 PM
People need to learn to keep opinions to themselves. Seriously, you can tell someone what you think as long as its not hurtful, but after that, let it go and don't push it. Your sister and nephew had no right to say what they did and they sound a lot like my uncles. :rolleyes: when I showed up for a family get together with the teensiest little nose stud, my uncles told me I should take it out and that it looked unsightly. Now, obviously I like the look of it or I wouldn't have gotten it pierced and left it in. People need to learn, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. :confused:

A. Correira
January 3rd, 2012, 01:32 PM
When I had first cut my hair short a while ago, my brother told me that it looked like I had dog ears. It kind of upset me. Maybe that is why I have started majorly growing my hair back out...

racrane
January 3rd, 2012, 01:57 PM
My grandma asked me why I would like my hair longer. She thought my bob was so cute. I understand preferences, but she keeps going on and on about it. I get it! You like shorter hair!

allio21
January 3rd, 2012, 02:00 PM
I'm half Native American and I get told I look younger than I am lol

aisha.christine
January 3rd, 2012, 02:09 PM
When I was at work a patron walked by with beautiful, long, hip length hair. I told a coworker how beautiful I thought it was. She responded, "Aren't you growing your hair out? It will never be pretty like that."
I told her she could keep her opinions to herself, but it still hurt my feelings. Sometimes people should think about what they say.

AdrianneJean
January 3rd, 2012, 02:17 PM
I always get told that my hair is poofy cause it's do think and frizzy. So I just decided to style it in a way that it's poofy on purpose so I can be excited when I say 'I know'

TammyT
January 3rd, 2012, 02:30 PM
The worst offender in making comments about my hair is me. I've noticed that the comments I make 'stick' with people around me whereas its probably not that a big a deal in reality. So I decided to stop. Well, try, anyway. But I do have unusual hair in that it's so baby fine and thin. Only my dad has this hair but he's a dude. : )

Kat
January 3rd, 2012, 02:31 PM
My coworker is always on me about my hair. Yes, I know, it got quite long, and the ends got thin because I was pretty much at terminal length, and it's dry, and I have split ends. She always wants me to cut it. "When are you cutting your hair?" Heaven help me when I told her I meant to eventually. (Wanted to cut from knee back to classic, but the hairdresser I've always used, who's used to my hair and who I trusted, is where I used to live, doesn't work on weekends, so I needed to pick a weekday to take a day off work and go visiting up there, and so it didn't happen for a long time). She kept on me about it. "I thought you were cutting your hair."

Finally I did it a couple weeks ago, held up my braid with the newly-thick end, and said "are you happy?" She's STILL on me. I should cut it even shorter. I should do an S&D to get rid of the split ends (I pointed out to her that I tried to do that once years ago, and doing HALF my hair took three hours. She wasn't hearing it, figured nah if I just put it in a braid and chop what sticks out... duh, it'd still take forever, AND I wouldn't get everything).

Pretty much what she says is that my hair looks ugly and nasty and awful. Those aren't the exact words she uses, but that's essentially how it sounds to me.

I'd like to tell her, "You know what? I understand that you think my hair is terrible. I'm not cutting it. Keep your opinions to yourself." Seriously, she's as bad as when your mom is like "but honey you'd be so pretty if..." The difference between her and my mom is that my mom is my mom, and she loves me, and she's known me all my life. This chick... none of the above. So she needs to STFU already and I wish I could say that. You've expressed your opinion, I've been polite about it but clearly rejected it-- over and over-- so now it's time to stop harping on it, especially since you're starting to make me feel really bad about myself (it's not like I'm really pretty and just happen to have this bad hair and it's no big deal to hear about it. I do not need ANYONE pointing out to me ways I'm unattractive. I already know. I already feel bad about it. PLEASE do not make it worse). (And my hair simply canNOT be THAT bad. Even my hairdresser, as she was cutting it, was like "actually, it's really not that bad" in a sort of surprised voice. So no, coworker, do not make it sound like it's the ugliest hair in the world, FFS.)

From now on I'm just going to start changing the subject. I don't care what I have to say. "So it's raining out there, eh? Gosh look at all this paperwork I have to do. Oh look, my shoe is untied again." I can't tell her off because she's my coworker so we need to get along, but f* if I need to actually listen to that BS.

AGFE0914
January 3rd, 2012, 02:40 PM
I know a great book that says something a long the lines of " A woman's hair is her glory" ;)

ArienEllariel
January 3rd, 2012, 03:20 PM
My coworker is always on me about my hair. Yes, I know, it got quite long, and the ends got thin because I was pretty much at terminal length, and it's dry, and I have split ends. She always wants me to cut it. "When are you cutting your hair?" Heaven help me when I told her I meant to eventually. (Wanted to cut from knee back to classic, but the hairdresser I've always used, who's used to my hair and who I trusted, is where I used to live, doesn't work on weekends, so I needed to pick a weekday to take a day off work and go visiting up there, and so it didn't happen for a long time). She kept on me about it. "I thought you were cutting your hair."

Finally I did it a couple weeks ago, held up my braid with the newly-thick end, and said "are you happy?" She's STILL on me. I should cut it even shorter. I should do an S&D to get rid of the split ends (I pointed out to her that I tried to do that once years ago, and doing HALF my hair took three hours. She wasn't hearing it, figured nah if I just put it in a braid and chop what sticks out... duh, it'd still take forever, AND I wouldn't get everything).

Pretty much what she says is that my hair looks ugly and nasty and awful. Those aren't the exact words she uses, but that's essentially how it sounds to me.

I'd like to tell her, "You know what? I understand that you think my hair is terrible. I'm not cutting it. Keep your opinions to yourself." Seriously, she's as bad as when your mom is like "but honey you'd be so pretty if..." The difference between her and my mom is that my mom is my mom, and she loves me, and she's known me all my life. This chick... none of the above. So she needs to STFU already and I wish I could say that. You've expressed your opinion, I've been polite about it but clearly rejected it-- over and over-- so now it's time to stop harping on it, especially since you're starting to make me feel really bad about myself (it's not like I'm really pretty and just happen to have this bad hair and it's no big deal to hear about it. I do not need ANYONE pointing out to me ways I'm unattractive. I already know. I already feel bad about it. PLEASE do not make it worse). (And my hair simply canNOT be THAT bad. Even my hairdresser, as she was cutting it, was like "actually, it's really not that bad" in a sort of surprised voice. So no, coworker, do not make it sound like it's the ugliest hair in the world, FFS.)

From now on I'm just going to start changing the subject. I don't care what I have to say. "So it's raining out there, eh? Gosh look at all this paperwork I have to do. Oh look, my shoe is untied again." I can't tell her off because she's my coworker so we need to get along, but f* if I need to actually listen to that BS.

so, what exactly is wrong with your hair? :confused: Cause I looked in your albumns and it's gorgeous!

Egana
January 3rd, 2012, 03:28 PM
I always get told that my hair is poofy cause it's do think and frizzy. So I just decided to style it in a way that it's poofy on purpose so I can be excited when I say 'I know'

Go big hair!

Bethmc
January 3rd, 2012, 04:08 PM
The hairdresser my grandmother used forever (and I did, too since I was raised with my grandmother) always told me that I should cut my hair off and get a perm. I did both of these in high school and looking back, I looked terrible 😢

thelittleredfox
April 6th, 2012, 01:45 AM
My Mum gave me the worst comment I've ever received last night.

My hair is midway between classic and knee and I haven't had a trim in 20 months. I have reached the point where my ends are really dry and I need one, but I've put it off and since I wear it up ALL the time, no one ever sees my ends.

Last night I took my hair down in order to tie it back again - bear in mind I hadn't brushed it or anything. My Mum said "why don't you get your hair cut? it is absolutely horrible" and my Dad said "get it all cut off, you should make the best of your features". I said to my Mum "why does it matter? no one ever sees the ends but me and I will get a trim - it is my hair not yours" But she kept on saying "your hair is horrible, absolutely horrible, I don't mean to be hurtful but it is really awful and you need to get it cut off". I said that it was hurtful, and she said "why? why do you find that hurtful? It is true, that last 6-12 inches is like old rope and your hair is far too long - it is really, really horrible, vile". She kept on pulling faces of disgust to match and just wouldn't shut up and leave well alone so I walked out of the room, but it really upset me :(

Venefica
April 6th, 2012, 02:06 AM
I was told by a former coven sister recently that when you look at me from the front and I have a bun so you do not see the length it looks like I have a bob cut because of my bangs.

I was told by a man on a forum once that I had to have a wig and he would not believe me when I said that my hair is real.

My mother who do help me color my hair say that having it as long as I have it is ridiculous.

carolinaberry
April 6th, 2012, 02:23 AM
The only hurtful ones I cared about were from my husband...the last time my hair was long-and it was healthy and shiny and soft-every single time I would wear it down, even with half pinned back or whatever, he would say, "Aren't you going to do something to your hair? It's just hanging there." I would always say, "I don't need to do anything more to it because I have fabulous hair."...but the comments got to me and I ended up ruining it and then getting it cut off and having a series of bad haircuts and damage from color/bleach/etc.

carolinaberry
April 6th, 2012, 02:39 AM
This. When I had dreadlocks I was constantly getting the 'how often do you wash it' and variations of, like 'How do you wash it' and 'Can you wash it.' It always struck me as being more nosy than anything, but yeah, a little accusatory too. I got in the habit of answering by saying 'with shampoo, how do you wash yours?' It always really surprised people to get their question turned around on them like that, and (I hope) gave them a sense of what an inappropriate thing it was to ask in the first place.

I understand you getting tired of such personal questions, but I wouldn't take a question like how to wash dreads as an insult. I've never had them, and I'd be curious about how to maintain them, including how to wash them without messing them up...but I wouldn't ask a stranger such a personal question, I'd Google it.

MonaLisa
April 6th, 2012, 02:46 AM
My mother, over and over again.....every time she sees it...She makes a sad face and asks me why I don't wanna be neat and beautiful... or she says my ends look terrible and I don't need all that length...or she says my hair is too fine and not meant to be that long, and more than once she tried to make an appointmet at a salon, for me, as a favour haha :)
With time, my reactions are getting worse too, so now she really hesitates to say anything, which is great! Apart from that, she's a great friend :)

blondie9912
April 6th, 2012, 08:27 PM
"Your hair is SO thin!" when I wear it in a ponytail. Like yes, I'm aware. I dyed my hair an awful amount this past summer and went through a major shed as a result. I hate to be reminded, so I try and stay away from the ponytails for the most part.

caadam
April 6th, 2012, 09:00 PM
I was in high school and while walking down the hall this girl spat, "GET A HAIRDO."

I had long hair back then, as well, and I sometimes just wore it down. It was usually just past my bra strap. I was such an insecure person back then, so the comment was painful. I wore my hair up in a ponytail or bun for the rest of my three years in HS. lol

I think if I had been more confident about myself, I would've said, "I do. It's called a long hairdo. How could you not notice something so obvious?" And then walk away. lol

turtlelover
April 6th, 2012, 09:04 PM
I was talking about growing out my hair at church the other week and a cute little old lady told me I am too old for long hair. Really, 37 is THAT old??? :confused:

Hollyfire3
April 6th, 2012, 09:11 PM
I was talking about growing out my hair at church the other week and a cute little old lady told me I am too old for long hair. Really, 37 is THAT old??? :confused:

Oh my gosh, i say 37 is YOUNG, very young! That person had NO idea what thier talking about! I turn to the lovely Holly Marie Combs (i know i'm obsessed)for my hair idol, she's 38 and has WL or so hair (and has had HL, possibly TBL in previous not to long ago (5 or so) years), she never has worn extentions and doesn't know, and although her hair now isn't LONG by LHC standards, its stunning, beautiful and full and she has said on multiple occasions that she plans to keep it long, ignore the mousebrains who say stuff like that, they are WRONG!:)

Seeshami
April 6th, 2012, 09:29 PM
My cousin loves "Look at her HAIR"

Shiny Head my co worker likes "Cut that mess." and "I have scissors." and "Arg WTF Alicia, Why is YOUR HAIR stuck to me? Who has hair this long? WTF"

Oldest sister once said "It's pink!" when I started henna. I was really hurt. Oldest and I have a really horrible relationship because we have really bad communication. Some day she'll stop assuming I'm mad at her and I will stop assuming she means what she says.:rolleyes:

I can take pretty much everything with a grain of salt and really not care. But the one thing I cannot stand at any time no matter what is, "Gingers have no souls."
:mad:

Kinkycurlygurl
April 6th, 2012, 11:32 PM
I was told that I need to put something on my hair to make it shine.

jbn
April 6th, 2012, 11:41 PM
Once in a while someone tells me that guys shouldn't have long hair, or that I should get a hair cut. Sometimes I just take it out of the ponytail and wave my hair to them and grin.

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/album.php?albumid=10092&pictureid=130064

Emy Sue
April 7th, 2012, 12:00 AM
When my hair is in a pony tail, I get asked frequently if it is a hairpiece.

My catty and jealous friends always say, "You looked so much better with a bob." And other things, too, to try to undermine my goal of growing my hair long. I think if they figure they can put doubt in my mind, I will cut my gorgeous hair off and be dull and boring, like them. Hmph!

Another thing that irks me is when people ask if I have a perm. My hair gets worn curly, strait, and in between all the time. Its naturally curly, though. So I usually stretch the curl to waves to avoid the "perm" comments.

caadam
April 7th, 2012, 12:28 AM
I can take pretty much everything with a grain of salt and really not care. But the one thing I cannot stand at any time no matter what is, "Gingers have no souls."
:mad:

You know, I'm not a redhead, and there's really no one in my family who is, either...

but I'm tired of these silly ginger jokes, too!

They get obnoxious, irritating, and angering after a while. My ex BF was terrible when it came to these jokes; he had stupid pictures posted on his Facebook page and I really hated it. It's like, dude... it's tired and dumb at this point.

I love redheads. lol Well, more like I love red hair.

Erika_92
April 9th, 2012, 05:28 PM
One time when me and my friends were getting ready for a night out I was brushing/ fixing my hair and I could see how one of my friend were watching me. From nowhere she suddenly burst out "I cant belive how you can STAND having bad ends like that, I trim mine right away when they start to turn bad!"......I didnīt feel that pretty that night :p

PolarCathy
April 9th, 2012, 06:30 PM
A superficial friend of mine, but her opinion still matters because she is from my country... We aren't so many here...

Anyhow she is the first person ever in my life who told me that my hair looks like unnatural and colored black. That insults me because 1) my natural hair is also very very close to black, I used henndigo only because my ends were sunbleached, 2) I'm proud of the fact that I'm all-natural, never touched hair colors, 3) even that little henndigo I had has washed out by now. It's gone. It IS my original color now dammit.

P.S. She admittedly colors hers because she's going gray.

Vampyria
April 9th, 2012, 06:43 PM
I got a lot of rude comments in primary and secondary school. My hair was very thick and curly back then, I would say 3c and I had no idea how to control that kind of hair plus nobody ever told me. So it mostly looked like big frizzy mess. My curls only looked good after swimming in the sea and just washed with water after.

Mostly people said it to my face and also behind my back but they made sure that I could hear them. I got:
- "Why don't you just cut it." (Yeah that would definitively make the curls disappear...)
- "When has this get in fashion." (Like I bought my hair on sale...)
- "What hairdresser is she going to."
- "Your hair is messy."
- "You look even worse with straightened hair."
- "She looks like a clown."
And of course I also got: "Why don't you brush it?"

I'm sorry for all of you that get comments like this, because I know how hurtful it can be. Some comments are really just made out of jealousy but I think it wasn't so in my case :p

Oh and I also got: "Should I get a tape measure?" in not very friendly tone from my ex hairdresser when I asked her to just cut an inch. I think it's clear why she is my ex hairdresser.

Vampyria
April 9th, 2012, 06:48 PM
And I almost forgot "It looks like a wig", when I dyed it black.

humble_knight
April 9th, 2012, 06:58 PM
I can take pretty much everything with a grain of salt and really not care. But the one thing I cannot stand at any time no matter what is, "Gingers have no souls."
:mad:

Hmm, is that from that CopperCab guy from Youtube? It's something he said in a video, I think, but I'm not sure. Or, South Park?

Happily, because my city has a large population of Irish immigrants, I see red hair quite often :crush:

daeana
April 9th, 2012, 06:59 PM
i honestly cannot understand people who come up to me and say things like "OMG I WANT TO CUT YOUR HAIR!!!" stay away from me, you psychotic creep. :scared:

every once in a while, i get a lecture on how long hair is dirty. clearly they didn't get the memo that people are washable.

Mrsbaybeegurl
April 9th, 2012, 07:03 PM
I have a friend who judging by all her comments to me is either jealous of me or just plain catty. She always tries to burn me with some witty comment about my looks and ends it with "I only tell you because I love you and want you to know, your my girl!" Anyways, I've been using henna for two years now and she says just about 2 months ago "I think the red looks good now, it really didn't suit you before but now your growing into it, it's a little much but looks okay now" Like really, WTH does that mean...grrr!

My brother calls me a ginger every time he sees me...but coming from him I don't mind, he's 18 and that's what little brothers do. I know he means no harm, he also makes fun of my height (he's 6'5 and I'm 5'4 lol) basically he just likes to mess with me and be annoying so I take none of it to heart.

My hair is still fairly short (in process of growing to armpit from shoulder) so I don't get many comments on length but my ultimate goal is tailbone so I shall see what happens when I get it that long.

shutterpillar
April 9th, 2012, 07:10 PM
every once in a while, i get a lecture on how long hair is dirty. clearly they didn't get the memo that people are washable.

really?! Do you happen to know the reasoning behind that one? I just cannot wrap my head around why in the world someone would think long hair is dirtier than short hair.

shutterpillar
April 9th, 2012, 07:12 PM
I have never had any horrible comments about my hair. I have had boyfriends though, that would tell me it would look good a certain way. That bugged me a little... like, just accept me for who I am. I am not going to bleach my dark hair blonde for you. If you want a blonde, you are more than welcome to leave me for one. lol.

ladylowtide
April 9th, 2012, 07:35 PM
ugh. This girl told me my hair was.... "lots of different colors..." I have been trying really hard to grow out my bleached ends, so it was hard to here.

Mrs.Witherup
April 9th, 2012, 07:43 PM
daeana that updo in your signature is marvelous! :) How did you do it and how long is your hair??

Lucky on my part I have never gotten any negative comments, to my face anyways! :p Lots of positive ones tho! My fav was a little boy in my sons preschool class who said I had "princess hair" :joy: Just what I was going for!

pes3108
April 9th, 2012, 07:49 PM
If I let my hair dry while pulled back, then it will make the top of it super straight and the bottom curly. My mom will often comment on how it needs more volume and then will try to "fluff" it for me :rolleyes:

Other than that, I can't really recall any harsh comments. When I was in middle school (right after I hit puberty) my hair got super, super curly and I had shirley temple ringlets. I remember being at youth group at church and other kids would come up and pull on a tendril and watch it "boing" back. That wasn't bad or hurtful to me but I have never liked to be the center of attention so it would really hit a nerve because everyone would look at me while someone did it. :blushing:

lolot
April 9th, 2012, 08:05 PM
When I had first cut my hair short a while ago, my brother told me that it looked like I had dog ears. It kind of upset me. Maybe that is why I have started majorly growing my hair back out...

hahahaha this made me laugh because when i cut my hair my sister told me same, i had short layers that i hated and she kept telling me everyday how awful i looked with my "ears" and that i should wear a wig until it was decent enough, i wasnt mad because i knew it looked awful but i didnt like that everyday she remember me how ugly i looked

daeana
April 9th, 2012, 08:06 PM
really?! Do you happen to know the reasoning behind that one? I just cannot wrap my head around why in the world someone would think long hair is dirtier than short hair.
i guess because we wash it less? and there's more of it? maybe we secretly use it for dusting the house? who knows. :p


daeana that updo in your signature is marvelous! :) How did you do it and how long is your hair??
why thank you. :flowers: it's an upside-down log roll. you can check the hairstyle of the month thread for more info. and my hair is calf-length. :)

Mrs.Witherup
April 9th, 2012, 08:22 PM
You are very welcome! :D If you can do it with calf length then I can do it with my just past tailbone length hair!
Btw, what is classic length??

ArienEllariel
April 9th, 2012, 08:24 PM
i guess because we wash it less? and there's more of it? maybe we secretly use it for dusting the house? who knows. :p

Oh yes, I'm sure we all use our hair to dust, wash the car, and wipe our butts. :rolleyes:

Silly, silly people.

darklyndsea
April 9th, 2012, 08:38 PM
I think that a lot of people say logicless things like that long hair is dirty without thinking about it, so if I ever got a comment like that I'd challenge it: "Why do you think that long hair is dirty?" Makes them have to defend their position, rather than you defending yours, and if they haven't thought about it before then they'll probably come up with some pretty weak defenses that you can shoot down really easily. Of course, there's always those people who won't actually listen to them, but for the rest of them...

Dragon Faery
April 9th, 2012, 08:39 PM
I can't remember any absolutely terrible ones. The worst one was in middle school when I didn't know curly hair shouldn't be brushed and therefore had an impressive case of Triangle Head. The bratty boy behind me whined that he couldn't see the chalkboard around my hair.

We'll see what happens when it gets longer and grayer. I'm sure someone in my family will feel obligated to tell me what's what. ;)

Clem_Dela
April 9th, 2012, 08:40 PM
last april, someone i know talked me into trimming my hair, going on and on about all the damage, after she BRUSHED IT OUT! i was more curly then so naturally it got all floofy when she did that... she showed it to me talking about damage and eventually convinced me to trim.

MoonlightShadow
April 9th, 2012, 08:41 PM
Well...I think it's cool that she thought u looked like a native American :)...very spiritual people.
I mean....people just like to touch my hair and ask if it's real. I remember being told when I was 10 that it looked like a wig lol..
About a month ago, these middle school/elementary girls were talking about my hair and said it looked uneven :/....I just slowly put my hoodie over my head.

bahoban
April 9th, 2012, 08:47 PM
I cut my own hair (layers too), the first time I did it I follow this tutorial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pyo7DXKT3lg
The girl straightens her hair before she cuts it, I avoid this step.

hey this is great!!! if only I had known this years ago!!;););)

but now I want my hair in one length so,,, but I really have to share this with my friends!!!

thanks for share!!:joy:

daeana
April 9th, 2012, 08:57 PM
I think that a lot of people say logicless things like that long hair is dirty without thinking about it, so if I ever got a comment like that I'd challenge it: "Why do you think that long hair is dirty?" Makes them have to defend their position, rather than you defending yours, and if they haven't thought about it before then they'll probably come up with some pretty weak defenses that you can shoot down really easily. Of course, there's always those people who won't actually listen to them, but for the rest of them...
unfortunately, since it's a comment that's weird and irritating to me, i've usually responded with something like, "fortunately, apparently unlike you, i am washable." diplomatic i am not. :p

pepperminttea
April 9th, 2012, 09:09 PM
Btw, what is classic length??

It's where the butt meets the thighs. :) You might find this (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/announcement.php?f=9&a=11) useful.

panffle
April 9th, 2012, 09:37 PM
This happened about 3 years ago, I was out with my parents and we ran into a few of their friends. This one woman there had a pixie cut, and someone asked her why wouldn't she grow out her hair. She looked at me (back then I had waist length hair) and very loudly she said "long hair makes you seem shorter!"
I'm 5'3 and so was she, and... well, even with short hair, she still looked 5'3. I just stood there a bit confused... I personally disagree with her.

Sewas
April 9th, 2012, 10:18 PM
I am disappointed that kindness, respect and manners is lacking in so many people and seem to relish being rude and like to bully others. I am Native American, and have never had anyone say anything negative to me about my hair. DH says it is because I look so stern and ferocious. LOL! I do come across as unapproachable. However, I did get one startled response from a friend who touched my ponytail and the ends are so coarse and straight they actually prick. She didn't say anything but I said it for her. I have horse hair.

Mrs.Witherup
April 9th, 2012, 11:43 PM
It's where the butt meets the thighs. :) You might find this (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/announcement.php?f=9&a=11) useful.

Thanks pepperminttea! I'm at classic for the most part! :joy:

Now if these sides would hurry up and grow, lol!

Zydrate
April 10th, 2012, 01:24 PM
When I was 13 one guy from the class told me that I and one another girl from the class have the ugliest hair in the school (it was BSL). I mean.. Why do people say things like that? I now that my hair is dry but I think that it wasn't THAT bad back then :(.
I've cut my hair very short after that.. Now I regret it.

pink.sara
April 10th, 2012, 01:36 PM
The worst comment I had in recent years was a PM on here saying as my hair at the time was short and chemically dyed I was "not really LHC material, as we are all about natural hair care and length, and perhaps a fashion forum would suit you better until you get a bit older, stop experimenting and really start to look after your hair?"
Fuming didn't cover it.

Renate
April 10th, 2012, 01:48 PM
The worst comment I had in recent years was a PM on here saying as my hair at the time was short and chemically dyed I was "not really LHC material, as we are all about natural hair care and length, and perhaps a fashion forum would suit you better until you get a bit older, stop experimenting and really start to look after your hair?"
Fuming didn't cover it.

:(:confused: This person just PM you out of nothing?

JellyBene
April 10th, 2012, 01:53 PM
The worst comment I had in recent years was a PM on here saying as my hair at the time was short and chemically dyed I was "not really LHC material, as we are all about natural hair care and length, and perhaps a fashion forum would suit you better until you get a bit older, stop experimenting and really start to look after your hair?"
Fuming didn't cover it.
Thats awful :(

pepperminttea
April 10th, 2012, 01:54 PM
The worst comment I had in recent years was a PM on here saying as my hair at the time was short and chemically dyed I was "not really LHC material, as we are all about natural hair care and length, and perhaps a fashion forum would suit you better until you get a bit older, stop experimenting and really start to look after your hair?"
Fuming didn't cover it.

What what what?! :mad:

JellyBene
April 10th, 2012, 02:00 PM
A woman asked me the other day "Oh honey what on EARTH would possibly make you want to dye your hair that dark?" with a disgusted look on her face. I am seriously questioning my color now, wondering if it really looks bad/unnatural.

Amethyste
April 10th, 2012, 02:06 PM
I used to have my hair in a cute pixie cut and dyed blonde white. had to wash my hair every day and color it every 2 weeks, and almost a can of hair spary a week! It was cute and stylish, but itwas too much work for me.

So after a year, it grew and now is past chin length and colored dark red. * I * like it, but seems that my inlaws (who are pretty rigid Germans) find it pefectly fine in telling me "you looked so much better with shorter blonde hair". Annoying!

pink.sara
April 10th, 2012, 02:07 PM
:(:confused: This person just PM you out of nothing?


Thats awful :(


What what what?! :mad:

It wasn't really out of nowhere, we'd both been commenting on a thread where an OP had said processed/dyed hair just made her feel "sorry" for the person with it and why couldn't people understand that their natural colour and texture suited them best...

I went and got on my soap box about being a really bad looking redhead and how nature had screwed me over with hair that bleached in sunlight to ginger but eyebrows that stayed almost black.... (true, and not pretty on me) and we had a bit of a two an fro.

Then I get this PM telling me the reason I dye my hair so often is because I'm "young and insecure" but as I got older I would "learn to love my natural self".

I'm not sure if this person is still a member as I haven't seen them in a while, but I ignored the comments! :rolleyes:

Avital88
April 10th, 2012, 02:20 PM
once when i was in the gym, a guy walked up to me, my hair was waistlength by that time.
He gave me his card,apparantly he was a hairdresser and he told me i should visit him, because my hair was way too long and he could fix it for me to a nice bsl length..
I told him im planning on growing longer and dont care what he thinks, he walked away offended

swearnsue
April 10th, 2012, 02:50 PM
My Mom made a comment about my hair being so dark and what happened to my blonde hair because it looked so good on me? But, when my hair was blonde she would say why did I go soooo blonde? Moms *sigh*.

If a stranger says something negative....well they don't call me swear'n sue for nothing!

TeaGarden
April 10th, 2012, 03:49 PM
I've had people snicker at my hair before and some people suggested for me to cut it. But when I hear things like that, even if they were supposed to be said behind my back, I confront them about it. I'm not very nice when people try to tell me how to do my hair (or dress, for that matter). It's not their place to judge, it's mine.

But overall, I get far more good comments about my hair than bad. Most of the people I know are just amazed with my hair. (Especially my guy friends. They like to play with it!)

Brenda714
April 10th, 2012, 05:21 PM
my mom used to tell me I had a 'rat's nest" , and when I got a little older, she said "when are you going to cut your hair?" Mother in law said to me in my early 40's "you won't be able to wear it down much longer because it draws your face down" Oh that's such a line of crap, when you age, you age wrinkle, sags and bags and no hairstyle will change that! anyways, I'm gearing up as I get even older to expect more cut it comments, or wear it up. I want for me and you my dear ladies to be so strong in our SELF and confident, that we can just look at them and laugh!!! Here's to being who we are !! My last comment is that these people would have the odasity even to say anything like I've read here. It completely defies all imagination. How rude and just plain weird....

duchesswannabe
April 11th, 2012, 03:56 AM
A woman asked me the other day "Oh honey what on EARTH would possibly make you want to dye your hair that dark?" with a disgusted look on her face. I am seriously questioning my color now, wondering if it really looks bad/unnatural.

No, don't pay attention to this. There are some people who really think that if you don't want to lighten your hair, you are not keeping up with the procession. In my teens I used to wish my dark hair was as dark as the dark parts are now (the dark parts got an ashy black as I got older), and my friend at the time said I was the only one she knew who wanted my hair to be darker.

PrincessIdril
April 11th, 2012, 04:43 AM
Thankfully I haven't had any nasty comments about my hair.
My major peeve is when my friends make dumb blonde "jokes" (sorry those are never funny), and when I challenge them about it. Their responce is always along the lines of "But your brunette!"

Firstly, I am not brunette. I have what my mum calls kaleidoscope hair and I was very blonde as a child.
And even if I was brunette, why should the fact I'm not "classically" blonde mean I can't get annoyed by those hurtful "jokes"?

Covet
April 11th, 2012, 05:39 AM
I get rubbish like 'I want to straighten your hair' (from my best friend) and 'you'd look so pretty with straight hair'

blah blah blah *snooze*

Changling
April 21st, 2012, 05:29 AM
She nodded her head and told me that I looked like a native americans (I took that as a compliment!) however I know she did not meant that comment as a compliment. I was just SHOCKED and :mad:.


Wow...I'm part Cherokee, but people can't always tell because we are practically an endangered species at this point, so I hear a lot of stuff like this when people assume I'm latino or something. Like there is some intrinsically wrong with native americans :(

Yesterday when my boyfriend was at work, a couple of women he works with commented on his hair thinning. They said "Wow, getting kind of thin on top, huh? It makes you look a LOT older!" He's 23. I am so angry. He came home and got drunk and talked to his mom on the phone for a couple hours and then he felt better. But I'm still mad. I want to go in there and just tell her, "Wow, your hair color looks really dull. It just sort of makes you look drab and boring all over, you know? Does it make you feel good about yourself when someone says something like that about your hair? No? WELL THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T DO IT TO OTHER PEOPLE."

Majala
April 21st, 2012, 07:48 AM
I've had a few friends point out how thin my hair actually is - which is true - when they saw me with wet hair. They didn't say it in a bad way, they were just very surprised because my hair normally looks quite thick due to a lot of volume and thick individual hairs.

Honeyfall
April 21st, 2012, 08:20 AM
I don't know how much this applies, but it's both the meanest thing anyone has ever said about my hair and the funniest:

A girl I once knew, for reasons unknown to me, really had something against me. She told multiple people 'Honeyfall has hair down to her waist. She tucks it into her shirt at the neck most days, but when she wears it out you can see how ratty and unkempt it is at the ends. It's disgusting, I don't think she combs it or conditions it at all!'

This was mostly funny because at the time I had a chin-length bob...

afu
April 21st, 2012, 09:12 AM
lol honeyfall!

I used to use toners to keep my hair as ashy as possible (i've stopped because i think they are too damaging and unfortunetly seem to be getting more golden on the lengths) and my sisters used to tell me my hair looked grey thinking it was an insult. In reality i love grey hair and in fact what they said was lovely compliment! If i could find a more natural way of toning my hair to a cooler shade it'd be on it in an instant

Mischamiu
April 21st, 2012, 09:49 AM
I once told my friend that my mum would never let me dye my hair because it would damage it, she looked at me with a strange face and said: "why? your hair isn't even pretty", it really hurt my feelings and made me feel like crap. The worse part is that she is always saying nasty stuff about me... I don't know what her problem is

Clem_Dela
April 21st, 2012, 09:52 AM
lol honeyfall!

I used to use toners to keep my hair as ashy as possible (i've stopped because i think they are too damaging and unfortunetly seem to be getting more golden on the lengths) and my sisters used to tell me my hair looked grey thinking it was an insult. In reality i love grey hair and in fact what they said was lovely compliment! If i could find a more natural way of toning my hair to a cooler shade it'd be on it in an instant

I hear you!! I love grey hair... A head of silver hair is just so beautiful to me... and If I could have pure white hair right now without bleaching it to hell then I would seriously be considering it!

Honeyfall
April 21st, 2012, 09:54 AM
I used to use toners to keep my hair as ashy as possible (i've stopped because i think they are too damaging and unfortunetly seem to be getting more golden on the lengths) and my sisters used to tell me my hair looked grey thinking it was an insult. In reality i love grey hair and in fact what they said was lovely compliment! If i could find a more natural way of toning my hair to a cooler shade it'd be on it in an instant

I am so with you! Isn't shiny silver/grey hair just gorgeous? I think it makes a lady look so classy.

*Sigh* I got my color from my father. He's turning 60 in May and it's only now starting to go silver. I'm not sure I have that kind of patience.

afu
April 21st, 2012, 10:10 AM
I am so with you! Isn't shiny silver/grey hair just gorgeous? I think it makes a lady look so classy.

*Sigh* I got my color from my father. He's turning 60 in May and it's only now starting to go silver. I'm not sure I have that kind of patience.

i think i have a while to wait too, my parents are only in their 40's but no grey yet. my grandmother is in her 70s and still no grey :( my dad's parents have grey hair in their late 60s

pepperminttea
April 21st, 2012, 10:15 AM
I once told my friend that my mum would never let me dye my hair because it would damage it, she looked at me with a strange face and said: "why? your hair isn't even pretty", it really hurt my feelings and made me feel like crap. The worse part is that she is always saying nasty stuff about me... I don't know what her problem is

She doesn't sound like a friend to me. :(

Honeyfall
April 21st, 2012, 10:28 AM
I once told my friend that my mum would never let me dye my hair because it would damage it, she looked at me with a strange face and said: "why? your hair isn't even pretty", it really hurt my feelings and made me feel like crap. The worse part is that she is always saying nasty stuff about me... I don't know what her problem is

Now this just bothers me - that she would say things like this to you, I mean. It shows a lack of common decency. I know that some people speak their minds more than others, or just take the view that anyone who is hurt by their comments needs to grow up and deal with it, but we are still responsible for the things we say. Especially if a younger person is involved.

Having said that, it could also be jealousy motivating such comments. In which case, take it as a compliment. I am sure your hair is great, all the more so because you're keeping it healthy. ;)

Sagi1982
April 21st, 2012, 11:02 AM
Stupid comments I've heard:
- Long hair is boring
- its old fashioned
- GROSS!!!
- its ugly and [see above]!
- it doesn't suit you.

@afu: you have gorgeous locks, I think they'll look awesome in grey!

whichypoohs
April 21st, 2012, 01:01 PM
No she's probably jealous of your length, that's why she wants you to join her

KrystalPixie
April 23rd, 2012, 01:18 PM
Since having to cut mine off into a Pixie do to damage I have gotten "boy, dike, the L word ... " the list goes on. I hate it but I know I can achieve long hair and I won't give up!

SacantRoese
April 23rd, 2012, 01:41 PM
Well I've had basically every malicious comment about long hair on men directed at me. Mostly from complete strangers, (women with shoulder length hair. sometimes young guys.) Including some distant family.
Y'a know, the "Are you a hippie, or a drug dealer, or in a band, or all three?" question. Or the tactless "Ewwww, OHMAGAWD, you never heard of a haircut?" remark.
I just laugh it off. Mostly jealousy, I assume.

Carrie Ingalls
April 23rd, 2012, 02:54 PM
I've had a guy tell me that hair as long as mine is "excessive" and "doesn't look attractive" on girls/women (or anyone).

lilbeef
April 23rd, 2012, 04:51 PM
Well I've had basically every malicious comment about long hair on men directed at me. Mostly from complete strangers, (women with shoulder length hair. sometimes young guys.) Including some distant family.
Y'a know, the "Are you a hippie, or a drug dealer, or in a band, or all three?" question. Or the tactless "Ewwww, OHMAGAWD, you never heard of a haircut?" remark.
I just laugh it off. Mostly jealousy, I assume.

People most certainly are jealous.. Especially when a fella has nicer
Hair than a girl! Some of the most beautiful long hair I've seen has been on a guy. And I find myself staring ! :)

lilbeef
April 23rd, 2012, 04:54 PM
The women In my family tell me I'm too old for long hair..and I'm only 32! I laugh it off. Also there's been times I left oil in my hair and put it up for work, giving it a 8 hr penetration time.. I've gotten some funny looks but I dont care. I'm working on Getting it healthy :)

Nedertane
April 23rd, 2012, 05:44 PM
the tactless "Ewwww, OHMAGAWD, you never heard of a haircut?" remark.
I just laugh it off. Mostly jealousy, I assume.

Ugh, that happened to a male friend of mine with long hair when we worked at the same place together. This insufferable woman chided him almost nonstop about how "ratty" his ends were and needed cut (they aren't, and don't), and really pushed for him to donate it (you know, to the point where it no longer sounded charitable ;)). She probably was just jealous, since he has nice curls, and her hair was totally fried and orangey from bleach. We laughed that she was just mad that she was old and still couldn't figure out how to dye her hair. :p

Bonkers57
April 23rd, 2012, 05:51 PM
Me neither, though mine looks far from great now.

Kids are just mean, pure and simple. Any reason to attack someone who's different and they will. It's society's job (mainly the parents) job to train that out of them. Unfortunately, these days so many parents are just as bad as the kids!


I don't think I've had a hair insult since Junior High. I guess I'm lucky!!!! Yikes!!!!

Mrs.Witherup
April 23rd, 2012, 05:53 PM
I don't understand the donation comments. I went for a big chop about 10 yrs ago (my choice, and I immediatly hated it, lol) and they cut off a 14 in ponytail, that I donated because I wanted to. That's a very personal decision and shouldn't be taken lightly, I think too many people don't take their hair seriously enough...

Bonkers57
April 23rd, 2012, 05:56 PM
Thank you! This has always bugged me, too! :rant:


Thankfully I haven't had any nasty comments about my hair.
My major peeve is when my friends make dumb blonde "jokes" (sorry those are never funny), and when I challenge them about it. Their responce is always along the lines of "But your brunette!"

Firstly, I am not brunette. I have what my mum calls kaleidoscope hair and I was very blonde as a child.
And even if I was brunette, why should the fact I'm not "classically" blonde mean I can't get annoyed by those hurtful "jokes"?

duchesswannabe
April 24th, 2012, 04:08 AM
Since having to cut mine off into a Pixie do to damage I have gotten "boy, dike, the L word ... " the list goes on. I hate it but I know I can achieve long hair and I won't give up!

There are people who love short hair on women; when I was a super shortie (in my forties, no less) I was treated no differently, and in some cases, better. It depends upon who you come in contact with--there are still people who don't think the length of one's hair has anything to do with their sexual preferences--it's called common sense.

marykatz
April 24th, 2012, 10:40 AM
I feel bad when people tell me they prefer my hair straight. Only my mother seems to like my curls. When I straighten my hair it looks damaged and limp to me. I can't understand why people seem to prefer it.

DancingQueen
April 24th, 2012, 10:46 AM
When I was 13 or so, I didn't really know how to take proper care of my hair, and it was always frizzy. This was before I discovered the flat iron. I was told it looks like Witch-hair!!!

Well missy, you just be careful I don't turn you into a frog! :stirpot:

Emichiee
April 24th, 2012, 05:11 PM
Lovely how she managed to be racist on top of being rude. Apparently native americans look old??

I know, I thought the same thing...:rolleyes:

I received comments like:

hair is too fine (M- 0.06mm), too thin (9"), too stringy (yes it is ^^), too long, too boring, ends are too thin, thin ends are damaged, you need to chop off at least [insert crazy amount], looks like "the grudge" film hair, is not fashionable...

I guess a lot of the usual stuff...but mostly people say it is too thin, when I was actually at ii/iii (4") before my hair loss...I dunno why people always think it is thin, maybe they see something I don't :shrug:

But even if my hair was thin, who says hair needs to be thick to be long? Never understood that way of thinking either.

So let them think what they want, they will always find a reason.

Hollyfire3
April 24th, 2012, 06:57 PM
When I was 13 or so, I didn't really know how to take proper care of my hair, and it was always frizzy. This was before I discovered the flat iron. I was told it looks like Witch-hair!!!

Well missy, you just be careful I don't turn you into a frog! :stirpot:

I have gotten this, this past Halloween I had blow dried my hair in a fast attempt to get ready...it was humid, do the math...I went over to a friend's for a party and our neighbor asked, "did you tease your hair so it goes with the costume" (I was a purple witch, very pretty costume I may add) I said "no...why?" "Oh, well then your hair is perfect for that outfit!" :confused: alrighty then...she then perceeded to take me to her house (we are friends as well as neighbors) and hand me some expensive curl frizz free gel (full of cones) its still sitting on my counter untouched. I know she meant well, but she just didn't get it because her hair is straight and smooth and not all that thick and certainly not poofy! Oh it was just...intresting.

Jessykins
May 23rd, 2012, 11:08 AM
The only time i had bad comments about my hair was before i had it cut dead short as i really didnt take care of it, and then when i cut it all off to about chin length. saying that i ws at school then and people say stupid things for the hell of it...

Anisaa
May 23rd, 2012, 08:53 PM
WOW!! Thank you all sooo much for sharing your stories!!! It seems that the longer our hair gets the more people feel the need to comment and persuade us to chop it off!

Recently about 2 weeks ago, I had another friend tell me that my hair was getting way too long and that I needed to cut it at least to bsl because I was looking like I had just come out of an uncivilized "place" (don't want to repeat it)!
I just smiled and said nothing, I don't care if my hair does not fit "city" life..I enjoy having it and don't feel obligated to give anyone an EXPLANATION as to why I want/like my hair the length it is!

Seriously, people should worry and comment about other issues that are affecting our society and our world...SADLY, if people would feel the urge to protest about so many injustices, as they do about HAIR this world would be a BETTER place!! <3

letibear
May 23rd, 2012, 10:30 PM
The thing I really can't stand is when someone tells me what I should do with my hair, or how to do it, because I RARELY wear it down it's "boring."

One lady I used to work with was always pestering me about my hair. "Why don't you ever wear it down, why don't you curl it, why don't you get bangs..." and one day she had the nerve to bring me one of those multi-purpose heat styling tools with a "here, use this and come to work with your hair done, I want to see how it looks."

It was incredibly rude, but I just thanked her and told her that I didn't want to use heat on my hair, which I keep in a bun every day.

MintChocChip
May 24th, 2012, 12:11 AM
I honestly think a lot of these negative comments probably stem from jealousy. Reading these, it's amazing how rude people can be!

I had a lot of negative comments in secondary school. Especially from supposed friends but teenage girls can be like that. I remember coming into school once when I was 13 and a friend rushing over to me asking me if I'd changed shampoo because my hair looked nice and not greasy like it normally does. Yeah, thanks for that!

Another girl, again at school, once asked me why my hair looked so bad. She suggested I straighten and highlight my hair like she did to make it 'feel silky like mine'.

Oh, and I used to (and still do actually) get called 'ginger' by random strangers. That tends to happen on public transport. I wouldn't mind at all bexause I've always wanted to be a redhead but it's the way aggressively shout it and snigger that gets to me. It's not even true, I've got dark blonde hair, so they're obviously blind as well as morons. If only they knew how much I want to be a redhead!

trolleypup
May 24th, 2012, 12:34 AM
Heh! Someone told me my hair looked nasty and greasy...which was only the truth, after a week in the back country, and at least a week of not washing before that.

Elenna
May 24th, 2012, 12:39 AM
A couple of weeks ago, my best friend (we've been friends seemingly forever) proceeded to tell me that my hair, looked like old ladies hair and needed to be dyed and cut. What made this hurt more was that she kept repeating it like a broken record. For the record, she used to have really long thick hair until she cut it. Her hair is now dyed (gotta cover those grays) and a chin length bob. She disparaged my hair, and the silvers (which I happen to like BTW). So this made me feel really unattractive and hurt. So last week at lunch, she again brings up her hair dresser as being really good, inexpensive, good at dying hair, and that I really need to go see her. Anyway my friend is moving next month, so I'm not going to correct her. But it's such a sad note to part ways with her.

Sigh!!! Just can't win. Apparently, one can't be pass their twenties to have long hair.

On the other hand, DH seems to love my hair long. His opinion counts more.

red-again
May 24th, 2012, 12:45 AM
Last week I had my hair in a braid at work. A co-worker, who is annoying to begin with, creeped behind my back, lifted up my braid and shrieked happily all over the office "Mousetail!!!"

Yeah, I know my hair is thin and my braid looks tiny and pathetic. No need to be so happy about it. :mad:

This is where my mouth would get the better of me - I would have responded "better than a mouse dick though" or something equally choice!

I told a hairdresser friend ( only just qualified ) of mine a few weeks ago I was washing condish only and going to grow to around waist possibly longer and her reaction - that side smile/smirk. Me being me I asked what the face was for - well you have tried all one length when your hair is long before and it drive you mad AND me mad with all your moaning! Funny that as I only grew to APL/ BSL since knowing her and she was my hairdresser who I was letting train on my and my daughters hair, and she wanted to try out layers, bobs, colour etc, etc. she moaned at putting my henna on so I did it and then she moaned I had missed bits, et, etc!

And no compliments ever on the shine or condition BUT in feb when I bleached twice and dyed red ( roots brighter than lengths too, awful). She said it looked nice!!!!

My points above, have made many! Are that you can't win with these people. If you can keep yourself happy without causing anyone any harm / stress then that is all you can do. Or just tell em to eff off! ( I did say to my supposed mate, well coming from someone who's hair looks like a bad batch of straw, I will most certainly heed your advice!" and then I laughed. Still friends but hair is not talked about now!!

error
May 24th, 2012, 01:26 AM
Oh wow people are so mean! The worst comments I have been receiving about my hair have been lately , most recent was at a videogame convention in Boston called Pax East , I was wearing my Skyrim armor that I made by hand ,and three men in their 40's stopped me and told me how real the suit looked . One of them said wow , that wig looks creepy and real ... I stopped , gave him a look and said well it is real , that is my hair . He looked at both of his buddies then at me and he was like that is disgusting , I am sure you are a pretty girl under all of that , and you probably get a lot less dates . I was seriously appalled with what he said and the following sentences that flew out of my face are rated R so I will not post them here. Lol ... aside from that I am told I look like an alien from Avatar a lot , but never in a compliment sort of way ...always the cocked eyebrow crinkled nose way. People are jerks , rude, inconsiderate, hurtful, and just plain mean . It does not matter how nice you are , and I get it .. most of society sees what is hot in magazines where all these hair tools are pushed , all these dyes , weird "scientific hair serum breakthroughs " so most people on the street have that crispy looking damaged hair ! It is something I never noticed before LHC but the desired look is damaged , and people with natural flowing long hair are reviewed as weird creeps. I was also shocked to read how so many people got terrible comments while shopping in wallmart !! That place is known for people going out in their pj's for a cheap movie some potato chips and more pj's LOL. What a world , anyhow I respect everyone on the lhc willing to grow out their hair no matter what people think of it ;) Also Native Americans have GORGEOUS hair I would def. take that one as a complement lol

Ticky
May 24th, 2012, 03:54 AM
I agree with error, people can be so hurtful and rude sometimes :mad:

I can't remember any especially bad comments, just the usual ''your hair is too long and it just looks ugly, it looks like a cow chewed on it'' (though I don't get the cow one anymore, since I cut off the fairytale ends) Why do they care anyway? If I want to walk around the street with hair that has been chewed by a cow and underwear as a hat, that is only my problem. Well unless I decide to go to a museum or a theater or similar, the limits there are understandable.

Charybdis
May 24th, 2012, 05:44 AM
I am disappointed that kindness, respect and manners is lacking in so many people and seem to relish being rude and like to bully others. I am Native American, and have never had anyone say anything negative to me about my hair. DH says it is because I look so stern and ferocious. LOL! I do come across as unapproachable. However, I did get one startled response from a friend who touched my ponytail and the ends are so coarse and straight they actually prick. She didn't say anything but I said it for her. I have horse hair.

Yes, it is sad. I have a similar experience to you -- no one ever says boo to me about my hair, in spite of my constant halo of frizz around the hairline and flippy, unmanageable waves. I guess they're afraid I'll put the evil eye on them! :p

Honestly, I cannot imagine what possesses people to think that it's appropriate to proffer their unsolicited negative opinions to near-strangers about their hair. I think that's what I would have to ask if I were on the receiving end of one of these comments -- "What on earth made you think that it was appropriate to offer your opinion to me on this matter, or that I would have the slightest interest in your thoughts on my personal appearance?"

Obviously, it's different if you're a boss and one of your employees is violating company policy, but even in that case there's no call for unkindness or value judgments about the individual's hair preferences -- just a clear statement of policy and information about what is required to comply. And I can see that if you're a friend or family member who genuinely cares, you might offer a gentle suggestion about what you think would look nice, or impart important information (e.g., "I hate to tell you this, but your scalp smells bad"). But then, once the other person has the information, you DROP IT. I will never understand why people feel the need to micro-manage the physical appearance of friends and family, but it seems to happen a lot. And I do think a fair amount of it is bullying and controlling people just for its own sake. :mad:

Tota
May 24th, 2012, 06:38 AM
... and people with natural flowing long hair are reviewed as weird creeps.

This is so true and so sad. Since I've given up blowfrying, ironing, dyeing and most of the harsh styling products I've heard comments (mostly from friends and family!) like:
- you let yourself go (you don't take care of yourself),
- your hair looks out of control and neglected,
- your natural hair colour is boring and it will never look as good as your dyed hair did,
- your hair texture is terrible - do you ever brush your hair??? (because I leave my hair wavy).

The only one who actually prefers my hair the way it is now is my bf - but he's always the one who likes everything as natural as possible lol :)

The sad irony here is that my hair is (for the first time in my adult life) completely virgin, healthy (I trim regularly) and in it's natural shape (wavy). So everytime I hear someone commenting my "neglected" hair I just cry a little inside and come here to TLHC to see all the wonderful longhairs here who also have "neglected" their hair just because they don't brutally abuse it. I'm just not that kind of person that would tell people that my hair is actually healthy and happy because they would think I'm crazy and vain. So I keep my mouth shut.

Miasen
May 24th, 2012, 09:45 AM
I am completely baffled at what people are saying to all of you! I have never once in my life gotten a bad comment on my hair. I'm not sure if it's like this in my country, or what it is. The only thing I get are the shocked "your hair is so long!" but it's always said in a positive way, like they wonder how someone manage to grow that long. :P (It's classic now, so nothing out of the ordinary. Hairdressers are always very positive about it, no one has ever wanted to cut it shorter than I ask for, usually the other way. :P

My hair is frizzy and unruly and mostly up in messy buns, so it's not like it's stunning or nothing. Maybe people around here just appreciate longer hair more, and don't only care for heat styled hair?

Here's to hoping people just start to shut their mouths if they don't have anything nice to say!

sharonluvscats
May 24th, 2012, 01:04 PM
I live in a racist town. I liked to wear braids a lot. A guy I know asked me why I had *insert racist word that beings with an N* braids. O_O I was too shocked to even respond. I went home and added another braid. lol

vatikagirl
May 24th, 2012, 04:40 PM
Yesterday I was visiting a friend of mine who has bsl length hair that is around 1b/ii and highlighted badly, I could actually see all the split ends and a bit of flaky thing going on on top of her head. She commented,"why don't you go for a xyz brand hair spa?!! it will be wonderful for your BAD hair" and I was like:shocked:
But then I thought poor girl, she could just have been intimidated by my freshly washed wavy hair, thats it. I responded very delicately "I'm more of a nature girl when it comes to hair and skin and I'm more sensitive to chemical stuff so probably I'll just skip hair spa."

Annibelle
May 24th, 2012, 05:53 PM
Unlike many of you, I got only compliments on my hair until late high school... I had hip-length, thick 1b double braids almost every day in 4th grade. When I moved to my new school, all of the girls in class flocked around me to play with my hair. :D They called me "Cleopatra" (I guess she wore double-braids? :p ) and, stupid me!, I went and cut my hair to SL because I didn't like all the attention. :o And you know what? Those girls didn't like me as much anymore...

I grew my hair back to that same look through middle school and people always said nice things about my hair. I never really did anything with it. Then I cut it in 10th grade, bleached it, dyed it a bazillion times... and it's been blah since! :D But I'm lucky enough that people don't really say mean things about it-- at least not to my face. ;) Maybe it's because it's not long yet.


I live in a racist town. I liked to wear braids a lot. A guy I know asked me why I had *insert racist word that beings with an N* braids. O_O I was too shocked to even respond. I went home and added another braid. lol

I've gotten that before, too. My friend's dad was drunk and said, "Are you wearing n--- braids? I don't tolerate that in my house." I said, "No, they're Dutch, actually..." And he said, "Oh, they look good!" :mad: If it wasn't my friend's going-away party, I would have said something that would have upset him. Blah.

KwaveT
May 24th, 2012, 07:42 PM
Some people like my hair and some don't. I think most of ones that don't like my hair are the ones that can't picture men having anything but short hair. This was said to my mother about me rather than to my face, somebody told my mother that I look like a werewolf.

Faux
May 24th, 2012, 08:49 PM
I've received a lot of insults because my hair is so dark. I'm an 1/8 Native American and I have dark hair. I do dye it, but its only like half a shade darker than my natural hair color (usually, I have to point my roots out). I grew up thinking that angels would all be blonde and that there was something wrong with me because I had dark hair. My teacher told me that my [natural] hair color was depressing and unnatural looking! She was a blonde, of course! She was speechless when I corrected her and told her my heritage. I had a doctor tell me the same thing. So rude.

I felt so bad I started dying it lighter. Then I moved onto crazy colors. Severe damage resulted, but I dyed it black in high school and its been this color for 10 years. My family wonders why I dye when its so close to my natural color, but I love the shiny purple undertones. I use professional dye and my hair is now in great condition! I love my hair now and if anyone every tries to make me feel bad about it again they are getting the f bomb!

Slug Yoga
May 24th, 2012, 09:40 PM
Some people like my hair and some don't. I think most of ones that don't like my hair are the ones that can't picture men having anything but short hair. This was said to my mother about me rather than to my face, somebody told my mother that I look like a werewolf.

I think I'd take the werewolf thing as a compliment! Then again, I like werewolves. :P

But yeah, I agree--it seems clear from a lot of the comments that people get that it's not truly about whether something "looks bad," it's about policing how someone of a certain age/height/gender/race "should" look. Annibelle, I think your story is a good example: the man had some kind of racist ideas about your hair, but as soon as you called them "dutch braids" he had nothing more to say. So it wasn't actually about how your hair looked, it was all about his weird bigoted associations. People are just unbelievable sometimes.

KwaveT
May 25th, 2012, 06:57 PM
I know clearly from what mom said that it was most definitely not positive. It may have been said while I was letting my grown out bangs (almost to bottom of chin) dangle in front of my eyes behind my glasses. My hair was starting to get in my way while eating. I now take those hairs and loosely twist them around the strand behind it and it keeps my hair to the side now. I put twisted strands on outside of my glasses now. This is only a temporary solution until both my bangs and length are longer.

catamonica
May 25th, 2012, 07:09 PM
She sounds jealous, like she has hair envy. I dont think she is your friend, making comments
like that. Wear your hair however you like. And who cares what she thinks!

GoblinTart
May 25th, 2012, 07:33 PM
I got told I shouldn't have long hair causes I'm a mother. :( I should devote my time to them, not to taking care of my hair. Said to me by a customer I had never met before when we started chatting about our kids. At the time my hair was BSL. That is not a long length to me. I was completely floored. The funny thing? One of my regular customers was behind her. She's an older Indian lady with knee length hair and 4 kids. She gave the lady a telling off. :D

Been told i must be lazy if I can't bother to cut my hair.

Your hair is too curly, you should straighten it. It would look so much better.

You're white, why would you grow your hair so long? O.o

And.....from my mother, not really an insult, but whatever. Now that you're joining the army, you need to cut off all your hair! That way you can just brush and go! You won't have time to put up your hair. Big mistake. I don't have stick straight hair like she does. I spent all of training getting yelled at about my hair. My dad was.so sad when my mom brought me home from the salon. I was the only one in our family with long hair. He thinks all women should grow their hair.

Whatever happened to if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all?

Charybdis
May 26th, 2012, 01:07 AM
Whatever happened to if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all?

Yes! And furthermore, what happened to minding your own damn business! (And in the case of many of these people with fried hair telling people with natural hair how "bad" it looks, removing the beam from their own eye before concerning themselves with the mote in their neighbor's.)

I think Slug Yoga has the right of it -- much of this behavior is about policing individuals to insure that they display the "correct" in-group behaviors. I've never understood why this whole tribal self-identification is so absurdly important to so many people. It's like they get insanely uncomfortable if they can't immediately slot someone into one of their preferred "acceptable" categories.

kitekats
May 26th, 2012, 03:22 AM
no one is too short or too old for long hair simply because natural and beautiful hair is the most precious jewellery a woman could ever have (it's God's given, you know)

DarkCurls
May 26th, 2012, 03:59 AM
"Lazy" if you don't cut your hair? First off, long hair doesn't necessarily mean you don't cut your hair... :rolleyes: All these comments are so sad and stupid.

I got a fantastic compliment this week on my curls. A girl, she's halfwya between acquaintance and friend, told me they looked fantastic and she loved them and (why do I always get this question?) asked if they were natural (yes, they are). I love compliments, because usually I get the opposite. This week I had only good hair days, my curls were bouncy and frizz-free, and I got all this:

- Have you ever tried to straighten it? (Twice, answer: yes)
- Why don't you straighten it? (Once, answer: takes ages and fries my hair. The girl offered to do it for me. Um... Thanks, but no thanks.)
- I like it better straightened. (I don't.)
- You should straighten it. (Seriously?)

I don't get comments on length yet, it's only about WL and people think it's long and pretty. But my curls getting dissed is kind of depressing. :( I like them, what's so special about straight hair? All hair is lovely.

Suze2012
May 26th, 2012, 06:33 AM
I've had the odd comment on..'you need a trim'..but it was true at the time as I hadn't had a trim in about 2 years..so fair enough and it did need it!

I went for a haircut last week and one of the girls in my team at work said she was looking forward to seeing my hair all nicely straightened after going to the hairdresser..then they all chimed in in agreement with her..
It's as if I am supposed to dream of having straight hair as if it's the 'ideal'.

I do find though that I only get negative kind of comments from women.

I had a guy behind me in a queue a few weeks ago who told me my hair was beautiful and asked how I cared for it..i just said I was it and leave it.

In the past week I've had two men shout out as they drove past me 'Great hair!'

I used to straighten my hair about 4/5 years ago sometimes and female friends and acquaintances loved it. I think I only had one compliment from a man saying he preferred it like that.
But.....when I stopped straightening and stopped using a hair dryer on it the reaction from men I knew well and barely knew at all was amazing..
One of my best male friends who I was chatting to one night ..I could tell he wasn't listening to a word I was saying as he was just kinda looking at me..he then interrupted me and just said 'I'm so glad you have stopped straightening your hair...cos for you..your hair is 'it' It's all about your lovely curly hair. Don't straighten it ever again'
Also I just had guys I only really knew by sight tell me in passing..literally passing me by saying that they were pleased I had stopped the straightening.

I love my curls..they're staying! :)

LaFlor
May 26th, 2012, 07:06 AM
Wow, so many rude people!

Although I've seen some long haired friends who maybe did need some constructive criticism, I definitely wouldn't offer it unless they asked my opinion.

A lot of time, we KNOW when our hair is greasy, needs a trim, frizzy, thin, etc. We don't need anyone to tell us!

OilPaint
May 26th, 2012, 07:06 AM
I think the two worst comments I've gotten are:
"Women with exceedingly long hair look like witches!"
and the recovery of
"The only people I've met with hair as long as yours are dirty hippies."

:rolleyes:Granted they were both said by a gentleman in his eighties, that since I've gotten to know has actually complimented my hair several times...

He didn't even know I was standing there with the first comment (first impressions, yay!:bigeyes:) , and I know now that they weren't meant to be offensive; just poorly worded vague observations about people that don't take care of their hair/hygiene.
At the time, though, I thought they were very rude/hurtful.

darklyndsea
May 26th, 2012, 09:39 AM
Yes! And furthermore, what happened to minding your own damn business! (And in the case of many of these people with fried hair telling people with natural hair how "bad" it looks, removing the beam from their own eye before concerning themselves with the mote in their neighbor's.)

I think Slug Yoga has the right of it -- much of this behavior is about policing individuals to insure that they display the "correct" in-group behaviors. I've never understood why this whole tribal self-identification is so absurdly important to so many people. It's like they get insanely uncomfortable if they can't immediately slot someone into one of their preferred "acceptable" categories.
Negative comments being part of policing in-group behavior would actually go a long way to explain why I don't get negative comments (and I know that I should probably be getting some, with how frizzy my hair is all of the time), because there's no way anybody's going to mistake me for an in-group member. :D

mzBANGBANG
May 26th, 2012, 10:34 AM
I got a weird insult/compliment the other day after I got highlights all through my golden honey blonde hair. The one stylist (who wasn't mine, thankfully) looked at it after it was dry and proclaimed, "Oh my GOD it looks SO MUCH BETTER." I know she meant it as a positive thing but of course all I could think was, "Really? It looked bad before?" I kind of thought I was going from good to good ;)

Cafe au Lait
May 26th, 2012, 12:52 PM
When I was younger, I used to be called "poodle". I was so introverted and shy, I didn't really stick up for myself.

Earlier this week, a coworker said, "Hey, crazy hair!" as a way to get my attention (first week completely heat-free and my natural curl is coming back). In reply, I said "Hey, shut the h*ll up." :D

GoblinTart
May 26th, 2012, 10:03 PM
"Lazy" if you don't cut your hair? First off, long hair doesn't necessarily mean you don't cut your hair... :rolleyes: All these comments are so sad and stupid.

I got a fantastic compliment this week on my curls. A girl, she's halfwya between acquaintance and friend, told me they looked fantastic and she loved them and (why do I always get this question?) asked if they were natural (yes, they are). I love compliments, because usually I get the opposite. This week I had only good hair days, my curls were bouncy and frizz-free, and I got all this:

- Have you ever tried to straighten it? (Twice, answer: yes)
- Why don't you straighten it? (Once, answer: takes ages and fries my hair. The girl offered to do it for me. Um... Thanks, but no thanks.)
- I like it better straightened. (I don't.)
- You should straighten it. (Seriously?)

I don't get comments on length yet, it's only about WL and people think it's long and pretty. But my curls getting dissed is kind of depressing. :( I like them, what's so special about straight hair? All hair is lovely.

I have no idea how .not cutting hair is lazy. I was just kinda like 0.o really? Funny thing was I had just cut my hair the week before. Yet it was still long.

lushlocks
May 27th, 2012, 04:44 PM
Ugh. I've been skimming this thread and people are really mean for no good reason. I'm starting to really appreciate my shrinkage.
My contributions:
When I got my hair cut really really short, my grandfather said,"You look like a boy."

A coworker said that I needed a trim. Not a mean comment in and of itself, but I'd just given myself a trim less than a week prior.:mad: Since I don't have my ends blunt cut, I guess she thought they looked raggedy.

Amygirl8
May 27th, 2012, 06:12 PM
In the midst of school, I've realized that the only people who comment negatively on my hair are the two 'popular' girls who regularly straighten their hair. And it's mostly coming from the one who's dyed and abused her hair countless times.

It's annoying because they'd scream you need a trim, then they'd paw through my hair in the middle of the hallway searching for a single split end, which they rarely find XD
Luckily one of the guys is obsessed with my hair and likes to play with it XD I get more compliments on it than insults, so it's all good XD

ohmygackt
June 5th, 2012, 01:02 AM
Last year in my Chinese class i had washed my hair the night before so it was curly, curly, curly, (even after i brushed it) this boy picked up a curl of mine and he said "Ever heard of a comb?" to which I replied "Every heard of a toothbrush?" :D yeah his teeth were yellow.

sibiryachka
June 5th, 2012, 11:05 AM
A former friend once told me "I wish you'd do something different with your hair". It didn't occur to me until much later that the appropriate response would have been "I wish you'd find something else to occupy your mind". I am not exaggerating when I say that was the beginning of the end of the friendship.

Celtic Morla
June 5th, 2012, 11:22 AM
I get told by hair stylists to dye my hair, its naturally grey, and I'll look younger..I know that but then I mush orefer the comments form people whom I have inspired to go grey naturally because of my hair!! Most people are surprised to find out my real age nce they look past the grey hair as I have really nice skin, few wrinkles and very smotth hands!

GardenGirl
June 5th, 2012, 11:55 AM
I find it so interesting that no matter the length of my hair someone has some opinion about it that I really wish they would've kept to themselves.

When it was long I was told I looked like I should join a religious cult. Which I found extremely offensive for many different reasons. Didn't surprise me coming from the individual it came from though.
When I got my pixie cut back in April the comments were Oh it'll grow back (as though to imply it looked bad, or looked better long). I actually got more compliments from men about the pixie than I did from women. It was interesting to say the least.

It's just amazing that no matter the style I can get comments that rum the gambit from complimentary to insulting in a single day. I guess people sometimes feel very strongly about hair and some just have less tact about speaking their opinion about it.