PDA

View Full Version : Is that your natural hair color?



candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 04:43 PM
Hey everyone. :flower:
So after reading a couple of threads about making your hair look as natural as possible, I was wondering what everybody's opinions were on telling people that your hair was naturally a different than it is.

Ex: A person asks a girl with red hair if it is her natural hair color. It isn't natural, but the girl with red hair says that it is.

What is your opinion on something like this? Would you feel lied to if you knew the person wasn't telling you the truth about their virgin hair color? Please share your opinions. I'd love to hear them. :)

isabelx
December 11th, 2011, 04:51 PM
I'd feel lied to if that happened yes. I dye my hair chocolate brown and I'm naturally blonde, I'd never lie and say brown is my natural colour though, I actually quite like telling people I'm naturally blonde, I love my natural colour, I just prefer it brown. I don't understand why people would lie about something like this, there's no need to be ashamed about your natural colour at all.

battles
December 11th, 2011, 04:51 PM
I try not to concern myself with what other people do. :shrug: It's a major waste of energy.

If someone wants to claim their fake color is real, all power to them.

NymphSpirit
December 11th, 2011, 04:53 PM
I think it's a dumb lie, I don't know, I don't understand why would anyone do that... But what I mean is that it'll eventually come out, no? Sooner or later :) it's one of those things you just can't keep up, like for example saying a random car on the street is yours just to impress people, I believe those two are very similar cases :)

Amber_Maiden
December 11th, 2011, 04:55 PM
I think it's silly to lie about your natural hair colour... And yes, I agree with the above, the truth always comes out eventually.

Also, it's pretty stupid to assume that people are stupid enough not to know the difference between a dye job and virgin hair... I can tell the difference.

Diamond.Eyes
December 11th, 2011, 04:58 PM
I never really understood why some people do this. I feel kind of deceived when people think I'm dumb enough to believe things like this. It's a pretty disrespectful thing to do. Especially to a significant other. If you are spending all of your time with one person, I think they would eventually notice root growth, etc. Or if you lie to your best friend about it too. It's like, why lie to me?

isabelx
December 11th, 2011, 04:58 PM
Also, it's pretty stupid to assume that people are stupid enough not to know the difference between a dye job and virgin hair... I can tell the difference.

Can't believe I forgot to say this. Agree 100%.

Lianna
December 11th, 2011, 05:00 PM
I don't lie about my dyed hair. However someone might think that's too personal to ask...sorta like "are you wearing spanx under that dress?"

Perhaps you just wanted to know where she got her underwear. :p Same with hair color. I rather learn about all the levels and shades of hair color, and different hair color brands than to ask a stranger about it.

However if someone I already knew changes her dark brown hair to medium red (orangey) for example, I'd expect her to not feel this about about me asking her what's her hair color brand and such...since I already know her.

I have a question though! What do you all think about people who conceal their natural hair color from their spouses? (making them think it's natural when it's dyed) I think in this case, we shouldn't feel the need to do it, since it's such a personal relationship.

I personally don't care if someone (stranger) would lie to me, I admire people who can maintain a natural looking hair color even though it's dyed.

ETA: There a lot of good dye jobs that can fool even the most knowledgeable.

battles
December 11th, 2011, 05:02 PM
sorta like "are you wearing spanx under that dress?"



:spitting:

Oh.. wow.

pepperminttea
December 11th, 2011, 05:04 PM
A bit, yeah, but it's nothing I'd lose sleep over. When I rarely ask it's normally so I can marvel at their winning the genetic lottery with such a beautiful colour (and feel as envious as all hell). :p

One thing I would say though, not all colouring is obvious if it's done well, and especially if it suits the person's skintone.

slz
December 11th, 2011, 05:06 PM
I couldn't care less one way or another - actually, what I find to be the most stupid thing in there is asking about this at all.

Diamond.Eyes
December 11th, 2011, 05:11 PM
I don't care if a stranger lies to me about something like this either, but then again I don't think I would ask a stranger that question. Though, many strangers ask me. It's a pretty personal question. And it especially creeps me out when weird old dudes ask me :shudder:. But, I think it's very wrong to lie about it to your SO. You would constantly have to dye it when he wasn't looking and come up for explanations why your baby pictures don't match, etc :laugh:. I've had a few girl friends who dyed their hair and all of a sudden they were telling people they were natural blondes and redheads. They even tried to convince me of it. It's just putting yourself through unwanted stress if you ask me. People would question you if they noticed any inconsistencies.

Aeris
December 11th, 2011, 05:11 PM
I can definitely understand why people would lie about it. The things we do to our hair (and faces and bodies) are things we do because we think it'll make us prettier - who would want to admit that they weren't born with it? It can make you feel less pretty.

I rarely have people ask about my hair, but when I do, I'm honest about it. It can turn into a long explanation if they haven't heard of henna. I don't usually ask other people about it though; it's usually obvious.

And I don't think anyone should hide anything like that from their spouse. My future husband will definitely see me makeup-less a lot, so I'd want to know beforehand that he still found me attractive that way :p

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 05:14 PM
I couldn't care less one way or another - actually, what I find to be the most stupid thing in there is asking about this at all.
I just want to know peoples opinions about this. Jeez. Take a chill pill.

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 05:17 PM
I don't lie about my dyed hair. However someone might think that's too personal to ask...sorta like "are you wearing spanx under that dress?"
I totally agree with this comparison. It's also pretty funny :lol:

mktmgt
December 11th, 2011, 05:25 PM
I basically was going to say what everyone else did. If a stranger does it, who cares. But if someone you are close to does it, they are pretty much wasting their time lieing to you about it, since you know the truth. Girls these days are way too insecure. They think that if their hair is unique, so are they. But no, it's all about personality. You aren't a better person just because you have pretty hair, and a lot of girls need to realize this. End of story.

Kaelee
December 11th, 2011, 05:28 PM
I always assume it's obvious I dye my hair...but some people don't know, so I'm surprised when they ask me. I don't think my haircolor looks all that natural, but it IS pretty.

I don't like it when people lie to me about anything, though I really don't care what a stranger does. Someone close to me? It would bother me.

I don't understand why people need to pretend their haircolor is natural when it's not. It's not a big deal. So what if you dye it? Welcome to the club, lol.

slz
December 11th, 2011, 05:37 PM
I just want to know peoples opinions about this. Jeez. Take a chill pill.
Erm sorry, I suppose I wasn't clear enough : what I find stupid is that people ask about other people's hair colour at all. Which was not hat YOU were doing, or am I mistaken ?

Pierre
December 11th, 2011, 05:40 PM
I think it's wrong to say it's natural when it isn't. But I have no problem answering "No, but it's colored naturally."

I've had someone ask me if I was Irish, and I've had neighborhood kids call me leprechaun (I guess they think that leprechauns have the same hair color as Irish humans, though I don't see why they should), so I guess they think it's my natural color. Once someone noticed that I had dyed when I went out a few hours after rinsing the henna off.

Hollyfire3
December 11th, 2011, 05:42 PM
I do not think it is a big deal, i try to put it out of my mind that haircolor is a moral issue. I don't see if as changing what you were born with because you don't like yourself, i see it as enhancing what you have. If you like your hair bright blue, more power to you, but i know its dyed. If i wanna dye my hair 2 flipin shades darker, i really don't think it matters all that much. And, it makes me feel good when someone thinks that is my natural color. Now, celebrities who mess up their hair with dye and don't even try to make it look natural, really? I do not understand that... but if they like who cares? My favorite actress (Holly Marie Combs) dyes her hair a different color every few weeks or so on Charmed, it is always brown, just goes slightly different shades. I actually like it though and i can't tell what her natural hair color is.

PixxieStix
December 11th, 2011, 05:42 PM
I guess I don't really care. I do not understand why anyone would lie about that. And if they do, what is it to me? I have auburn hair, and am happily using henna to get more red in it because it was much redder when I was younger, and it suites my skin tone very well. I'd never imagine lying to anyone about it though. And if someone does lie to me about their natural color, well, no skin off my back. People do strange things though.

invisiblebabe
December 11th, 2011, 05:45 PM
Hey everyone. :flower:
So after reading a couple of threads about making your hair look as natural as possible, I was wondering what everybody's opinions were on telling people that your hair was naturally a different than it is.

Ex: A person asks a girl with red hair if it is her natural hair color. It isn't natural, but the girl with red hair says that it is.

What is your opinion on something like this? Would you feel lied to if you knew the person wasn't telling you the truth about their virgin hair color? Please share your opinions. I'd love to hear them. :)

If it's not a matter of perception (i.e. they tell you their hair is naturally light brown when you think it is dark blonde), then yes, I'd consider it to be lying.

luxepiggy
December 11th, 2011, 05:57 PM
I wouldn't really feel comfortable asking someone a question like that in the first place. It sort of puts the other person on the spot, KWIM? You never know what their situation is. For example, one of my friends in high school had quite a bit of white/gray hair by junior year (genetic thing). She covered it with dye, but it was always a touchy subject.

Personally, I love telling people that this isn't my natural hair colour! Maybe it's the novelty of it, since this year was the first time I've ever done it (^(oo)^)

MsBubbles
December 11th, 2011, 05:58 PM
Yes, it would bother me if when asked, somebody claimed that their hair color were their own. Not because they are deluding themselves or because they can't bear to admit it to themselves, but because they think they can get that one by me. You can usually tell by looking at the very root of the hair. I have not yet seen a dye/bleach job that looked natural.

But then how would I know the ones I believed were natural, really were :eye:? I'd like to think I could tell. :shrug:

A. Correira
December 11th, 2011, 06:01 PM
In the past when I had dyed my hair a dark brown (my natural is a strawberry blonde) I had a lot of people ask me if that was my natural color because it looked like it could have been. And of course I would tell them no and that I liked my natural much more (which I do) I was just trying something new.

I would hope that someone wouldn't lie about their natural color... especially when I really think that most people's natural colors are quite beautiful. Some people want to try new things eventually but I don't see why anyone would or should lie about it.

luxepiggy
December 11th, 2011, 06:13 PM
Hair colour is a pretty fickle thing too . . . with my natural colour, people often assumed it was dyed, and would look at me askance when I tried to explain otherwise. They probably thought I was lying. Ironically, now that I've dyed it, everyone assumes it's my natural colour, and reacts with shocked disbelief when I tell them it's not. LOL!

blondie9912
December 11th, 2011, 06:24 PM
It depends who you're asking. My friends and I discuss hair and makeup exhaustively, so I wouldn't be offended if someone asked me about my natural colour. In theory, the question is somewhat similar to 'Are you wearing makeup?', which some people might find more personal. Among teenage girls, I don't think it would be offensive, but if I was older I think I might find it somewhat awkward.

I suppose it depends on the person. I don't wear makeup or style my hair most of the time, because I know I look fine without it. Someone with a lower self-esteem (wears a lot of makeup, colours/styles their hair a lot, tries to cover what they 'naturally' look like) might be more bothered by the question.

MsBubbles
December 11th, 2011, 06:28 PM
Blondie, the OP's question was whether if you asked somebody if their hair color were their natural hair color and they said 'yes' even though it's not, would THAT offend you (that they lied to you and tried to pass it off as natural)?

allycat
December 11th, 2011, 06:32 PM
I don't think anyone is obligated to tell me the truth about their beauty habits at all. Unless it is someone one is close to, I think people could perceive it as way too intrusive and personal to ask such a question. I would.

slythwolf
December 11th, 2011, 06:44 PM
Would I feel lied to if someone told me a lie? ...yes? Do I not understand the question?

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 06:48 PM
It depends who you're asking. My friends and I discuss hair and makeup exhaustively, so I wouldn't be offended if someone asked me about my natural colour. In theory, the question is somewhat similar to 'Are you wearing makeup?', which some people might find more personal. Among teenage girls, I don't think it would be offensive, but if I was older I think I might find it somewhat awkward.

I suppose it depends on the person. I don't wear makeup or style my hair most of the time, because I know I look fine without it. Someone with a lower self-esteem (wears a lot of makeup, colours/styles their hair a lot, tries to cover what they 'naturally' look like) might be more bothered by the question.
I don't understand what you mean?...

Loviatar
December 11th, 2011, 06:48 PM
My hair is dark brown. For the past 4-5 months I have been growing out old red henna and my roots have been coming in. I have been using a dark brown semi permanent dye to blend the length in with the roots. Therefore technically this is not my natural colour, but if someone asked me, I would say it was, rather than explain all the henna story.

As for people saying baby pictures don't match, I was blonde until I was six.

The 'is your hair natural' debate is something which irritates me a lot because one of the girls in my theatre group is a natural redhead. She is not the only natural redhead but she is the brightest. We have 2 redhaired men and one other redheaded girl. Girl 2 used to be a lot brighter red when she was younger, as did one of the redheaded men. They have both darkened up over the past 5 years or so. Anyway, when I dyed my hair red, Girl 1 persisted in pointing out to me and anyone who was commenting on it that "it wasnt natural". She did this when my hair was ginger-red (like hers), when it was copper, conker-red-brown, and flaming uber unnatural pillarbox red (yeah, as if anyone's going to take that for natural!) She also comments on Girl 2's hair and claims that she is not a redhead any more 'because she's darkened up'. Sure, Girl 2 is not as carroty-ginger-red as Girl 1 any more, but she's still a redhead. Get over yourself. :lol:

Basically, I don't see why anyone should ask someone else if X is their natural colour. I dont see why it matters to anyone, or why it should.

jacqueline101
December 11th, 2011, 06:51 PM
I'm a blondette brown and blonde streaked coloring my hair changes on its own. I don't dye my hair.

Diamond.Eyes
December 11th, 2011, 06:55 PM
My hair is dark brown. For the past 4-5 months I have been growing out old red henna and my roots have been coming in. I have been using a dark brown semi permanent dye to blend the length in with the roots. Therefore technically this is not my natural colour, but if someone asked me, I would say it was, rather than explain all the henna story.

As for people saying baby pictures don't match, I was blonde until I was six.

The 'is your hair natural' debate is something which irritates me a lot because one of the girls in my theatre group is a natural redhead. She is not the only natural redhead but she is the brightest. We have 2 redhaired men and one other redheaded girl. Girl 2 used to be a lot brighter red when she was younger, as did one of the redheaded men. They have both darkened up over the past 5 years or so. Anyway, when I dyed my hair red, Girl 1 persisted in pointing out to me and anyone who was commenting on it that "it wasnt natural". She did this when my hair was ginger-red (like hers), when it was copper, conker-red-brown, and flaming uber unnatural pillarbox red (yeah, as if anyone's going to take that for natural!) She also comments on Girl 2's hair and claims that she is not a redhead any more 'because she's darkened up'. Sure, Girl 2 is not as carroty-ginger-red as Girl 1 any more, but she's still a redhead. Get over yourself. :lol:

Basically, I don't see why anyone should ask someone else if X is their natural colour. I dont see why it matters to anyone, or why it should.
Wow, she sounds friendly :rolleyes:. I've met a couple of other redheads like that. They've insisted that I had to have dyed my hair and that it wasn't natural. It's like they had to be the only natural redhead in the room or something. Some people really let stupid things define them. You should tell that first girl to buzz off ;).

Helene
December 11th, 2011, 07:01 PM
100% agree with what she said.

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 07:03 PM
My hair is dark brown. For the past 4-5 months I have been growing out old red henna and my roots have been coming in. I have been using a dark brown semi permanent dye to blend the length in with the roots. Therefore technically this is not my natural colour, but if someone asked me, I would say it was, rather than explain all the henna story.

As for people saying baby pictures don't match, I was blonde until I was six.

The 'is your hair natural' debate is something which irritates me a lot because one of the girls in my theatre group is a natural redhead. She is not the only natural redhead but she is the brightest. We have 2 redhaired men and one other redheaded girl. Girl 2 used to be a lot brighter red when she was younger, as did one of the redheaded men. They have both darkened up over the past 5 years or so. Anyway, when I dyed my hair red, Girl 1 persisted in pointing out to me and anyone who was commenting on it that "it wasnt natural". She did this when my hair was ginger-red (like hers), when it was copper, conker-red-brown, and flaming uber unnatural pillarbox red (yeah, as if anyone's going to take that for natural!) She also comments on Girl 2's hair and claims that she is not a redhead any more 'because she's darkened up'. Sure, Girl 2 is not as carroty-ginger-red as Girl 1 any more, but she's still a redhead. Get over yourself. :lol:

Basically, I don't see why anyone should ask someone else if X is their natural colour. I dont see why it matters to anyone, or why it should.
Ew. That first girl sounds like a creep. You should tell her to mind her own business. She sounds pretty insecure about someone having the same hair color as hers. Some girls :rolleyes:.

Helene
December 11th, 2011, 07:04 PM
100% agree with what she said.

"I try not to concern myself with what other people do. :shrug: It's a major waste of energy.

If someone wants to claim their fake color is real, all power to them." via Battles

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 07:06 PM
I basically was going to say what everyone else did. If a stranger does it, who cares. But if someone you are close to does it, they are pretty much wasting their time lieing to you about it, since you know the truth. Girls these days are way too insecure. They think that if their hair is unique, so are they. But no, it's all about personality. You aren't a better person just because you have pretty hair, and a lot of girls need to realize this. End of story.
You for sure speak the truth. Some people are so superficial and think they are better just because they look a certain way. I noticed a lot of this behavior when I was in high school. It's very immature and pointless.

Lianna
December 11th, 2011, 07:11 PM
Girls these days are way too insecure.

I don't know if mean you girls as just younger ladies (til 20's) or women in general. The question I asked concerning letting the husband know was triggered by the fact that many women (including older) go to the salon bi-weekly to get roots done and not even their husbands know. It's a reality and I wanted some opinions on it.


it makes me feel good when someone thinks that is my natural color.

It's a compliment on my hair dyeing skills! :D


I have not yet seen a dye/bleach job that looked natural.

Just out of curiosity do you (and anyone else) would think this looks natural?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6zzivbTnmA&list=PLA37EBC3AF31C333F&index=9&feature=plpp_video

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 07:17 PM
Just out of curiosity do you (and anyone else) would think this looks natural?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6zzivbTnmA&list=PLA37EBC3AF31C333F&index=9&feature=plpp_video

I don't mean to sound rude, but can we please stay on topic here? I didn't make this thread for people to judge if other peoples hair was natural or not...

sbhonda
December 11th, 2011, 07:25 PM
I think that dyeing your hair is so commonplace now, it's nothing to be embarrassed about and there's no reason to lie. It's obvious to anyone I've known for any significant amount of time that my hair is dyed because it has changed colors numerous times.

I think very few people look down on dyed hair, so I personally see no reason to lie about it.

Lianna
December 11th, 2011, 07:33 PM
I don't mean to sound rude, but can we please stay on topic here? I didn't make this thread for people to judge if other peoples hair was natural or not...

That's too bad, because I was enjoying the thread. You do sound rude. Subjects stray away, they provoke new topics, related, it's natural.

I didn't mean it as a challenging answer to Miss Bubbles, which is a new friend of mine, and extremely pleasant.

I shall excuse myself from this thread now.

Hollyfire3
December 11th, 2011, 07:37 PM
I don't know if mean you girls as just younger ladies (til 20's) or women in general. The question I asked concerning letting the husband know was triggered by the fact that many women (including older) go to the salon bi-weekly to get roots done and not even their husbands know. It's a reality and I wanted some opinions on it.



It's a compliment on my hair dyeing skills! :D



Just out of curiosity do you (and anyone else) would think this looks natural?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6zzivbTnmA&list=PLA37EBC3AF31C333F&index=9&feature=plpp_video


I wish i could dye my own hair but, no the "i love your "natural" color compliment" goes to to my hairdresser because she dyes my hair, tried it myself once, wound up with ariel red hair as opposed to dark chestnut. . .kudos to u for being able to dye your own hair with succes.

aisha.christine
December 11th, 2011, 08:20 PM
I personally don't ask this question to people because, to me, it sounds like a catty thing to do. I don't ask people of they're wearing false eyelashes or colored contacts, and it seems like posing this question is supercilious. If that's how they feel comfortable, fine by me. It's not my body. Being lied to isn't really that big of a deal to me anymore, especially for something so petty as someone else's hair color. People tell lies about stuff all of the time, so I just take it with a grain of salt.

What I don't like is when people patronize people for dying their hair. People do this to my mom ALL of the time, telling her that she should embrace her natural color. If she feels more comfortable dying her hair, who am I to step in and say that she's wrong for it. She's allowed to have beautiful hair, too.

As to the making your hair look as natural as possible, I don't think this necessarily means pretending that it's your natural hair color. I think it should be interpreted as making it complement one's face and skin. I don't think that someone should be subjected to looking less than ideal or outlandish because it would come off as deceptive (e.g. someone goes to their salon and gets their hair dyed ash blonde because it complements their skin and face better than a honey blonde or platinum blonde.)

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 08:22 PM
That's too bad, because I was enjoying the thread. You do sound rude. Subjects stray away, they provoke new topics, related, it's natural.

I didn't mean it as a challenging answer to Miss Bubbles, which is a new friend of mine, and extremely pleasant.

I shall excuse myself from this thread now.
After reading a few comments on your profile, it seems that you offend a lot of people with your posts. If you were offended that's your opinion, but like I said we aren't here to judge other peoples hair. If you want opinions on if you think somebodies hair is fake, make another thread about it.

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 08:35 PM
I personally don't ask this question to people because, to me, it sounds like a catty thing to do. I don't ask people of they're wearing false eyelashes or colored contacts, and it seems like posing this question is supercilious. If that's how they feel comfortable, fine by me. It's not my body. Being lied to isn't really that big of a deal to me anymore, especially fro something so petty as someone else's hair color. People tell lies about stuff all of the time, so I just take it with a grain of salt.

What I don't like is when people patronize people for dying their hair. People do this to my mom ALL of the time, telling her that she should embrace her natural color. If she feels more comfortable dying her hair, who am I to step in and say that she's wrong for it. She's allowed to have beautiful hair, too.

As to the making your hair look as natural as possible, I don't think this necessarily means pretending that it's your natural hair color. I think it should be interpreted as making it complement one's face and skin. I don't think that someone should be subjected to looking less than ideal or outlandish because it would come off as deceptive (e.g. someone goes to their salon and gets their hair dyed ash blonde because it complements their skin and face better than a honey blonde or platinum blonde.)
I don't judge people who dye their hair either. At all. I mean, I dye my hair. I just don't think it's cool when people lie to me. That's really cool that you don't let it bother you, I wish I wouldn't let it get to me, but it bothers me when my close friends lie to me about things like that. I feel wronged by it because they are supposed to trust you with things like that, and when they can't even tell me their natural hair color, I feel like they don't trust me enough or something. It also concerns me when my friends lie to their boyfriends about their natural hair color, because they are are just setting themselves up for disaster by lying to their lovers. And I don't want to see that happen. I guess I care so much, because I care about my friends and I don't want others to think they are shady for lying about it. It does bother me, but it's not because I think I'm better than them because I don't lie about my natural hair color, but because they are just ruining their identity by lying about themselves.

Lianna
December 11th, 2011, 08:38 PM
After reading a few comments on your profile, it seems that you offend a lot of people with your posts. If you were offended that's your opinion, but like I said we aren't here to judge other peoples hair. If you want opinions on if you think somebodies hair is fake, make another thread about it.

Wow. First of all, I did not wish to come back to this thread, but you quoted me.

Second, I do not "offend a lot of people", if I did that I wasn't a member here for 2 years, I was banned because we have rules, often refered as KNIT, you should search what that is.

I thought someone was mad because we were discussing something they felt it shouldn't be discussed, which I agree that in another specific thread would be more appropriate. And I was discussing everything in general terms. I was not attacking the OP in this thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=83547), which a lot of people did. She's very nice and also my friend.

I posted the video link to actually show how dyed hair can be natural looking, which is my opinion. Someone else brought up the subject of hair looking natural or not, I merely responded to it.

If you wanna say anything else to me, I prefer it if you do it by PM, because I don't wanna risk my membership here, which I appreciate very much. I won't respond anymore, no matter how offensive you are to me.

Diamond.Eyes
December 11th, 2011, 08:42 PM
I don't judge people who dye their hair either. At all. I mean, I dye my hair. I just don't think it's cool when people lie to me. That's really cool that you don't let it bother you, I wish I wouldn't let it get to me, but it bothers me when my close friends lie to me about things like that. I feel wronged by it because they are supposed to trust you with things like that, and when they can't even tell me their natural hair color, I feel like they don't trust me enough or something. It also concerns me when my friends lie to their boyfriends about their natural hair color, because they are are just setting themselves up for disaster by lying to their lovers. And I don't want to see that happen. I guess I care so much, because I care about my friends and I don't want others to think they are shady for lying about it. It does bother me, but it's not because I think I'm better than them because I don't lie about my natural hair color, but because they are just ruining their identity by lying about themselves.
I agree with everything you've said. It makes me really upset and borderline angry when my friends don't feel that they can share something as simple as hair with me. It just seems a bit silly :shrug:. And I don't really see how anyone isn't bothered when they are being lied to, especially if it's a friend doing the lying. I don't ask if people dye their hair, because I could care less. And I know how annoyed I feel when people ask if mine is dyed. But if it comes up in conversation, and I know you are lying to me, I will feel deceived. That's a normal reaction when one is being lied to, isn't it? If not, correct me if I'm wrong. :)

Yasmine91
December 11th, 2011, 08:44 PM
It may have something to do with stereotypes. A blonde person who dyes there hair dark usually want to break that blonde bimbo, dumb, easy assumption that people associate with blondes or gingers who dye there hair to stop being ridiculed for being ginger, or brunettes who dye there hair blonde because apparently brunette are prudish, bitchy etc.

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 08:48 PM
It may have something to do with stereotypes. A blonde person who dyes there hair dark usually want to break that blonde bimbo, dumb, easy assumption that people associate with blondes or gingers who dye there hair to stop being ridiculed for being ginger, or brunettes who dye there hair blonde because apparently brunette are prudish, bitchy etc.
That's a really good point that I never considered. If a person lies because they are ashamed of themselves, then that's pretty sad. If my friend was lieing because they were ashamed of who they were, I would def try and help them see in a different light.

Demetrue
December 11th, 2011, 08:49 PM
If it's a friend, then I would know that their hair color has obviously changed overnight, so I wouldn't ask if it was natural - I would say I liked their new look if I liked it, or say nothing if I didn't prefer it. Some people are very private about their personal beauty routines and don't feel comfortable telling people that they dye their hair, pluck their eyebrows, got a nose job or whatever. Beauty can lose its mystery if you show your husband how you pluck your eyebrows, wear a green clay mask, dump dye on your head and walk around in curlers and spanx. I think some guys would rather not know :D

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 08:50 PM
I agree with everything you've said. It makes me really upset and borderline angry when my friends don't feel that they can share something as simple as hair with me. It just seems a bit silly :shrug:. And I don't really see how anyone isn't bothered when they are being lied to, especially if it's a friend doing the lying. I don't ask if people dye their hair, because I could care less. And I know how annoyed I feel when people ask if mine is dyed. But if it comes up in conversation, and I know you are lying to me, I will feel deceived. That's a normal reaction when one is being lied to, isn't it? If not, correct me if I'm wrong. :)
Yeah seriously girl. I get pretty upset. I feel like I'm not good enough to know the truth about them or something. I want my friends to trust me, you know?

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 08:53 PM
If it's a friend, then I would know that their hair color has obviously changed overnight, so I wouldn't ask if it was natural - I would say I liked their new look if I liked it, or say nothing if I didn't prefer it. Some people are very private about their personal beauty routines and don't feel comfortable telling people that they dye their hair, pluck their eyebrows, got a nose job or whatever. Beauty can lose its mystery if you show your husband how you pluck your eyebrows, wear a green clay mask, dump dye on your head and walk around in curlers and spanx. I think some guys would rather not know :D
That is very true. I think dying is part of a beauty routine, but it's the most noticable. I just don't think it's right to hide things from people who love you. If they aren't interested, then whatever :laugh:, but if they are interested then I don't know why you would lie to your SO about it. If they love you, I don't think they would really give a darn. :)

aisha.christine
December 11th, 2011, 08:58 PM
I don't judge people who dye their hair either. At all. I mean, I dye my hair. I just don't think it's cool when people lie to me. That's really cool that you don't let it bother you, I wish I wouldn't let it get to me, but it bothers me when my close friends lie to me about things like that. I feel wronged by it because they are supposed to trust you with things like that, and when they can't even tell me their natural hair color, I feel like they don't trust me enough or something. It also concerns me when my friends lie to their boyfriends about their natural hair color, because they are are just setting themselves up for disaster by lying to their lovers. And I don't want to see that happen. I guess I care so much, because I care about my friends and I don't want others to think they are shady for lying about it. It does bother me, but it's not because I think I'm better than them because I don't lie about my natural hair color, but because they are just ruining their identity by lying about themselves.

I totally understand where you are coming from, and I don't think anyone likes being lied to, but in my case, I just have to stop caring. I've had friends lie about things that are way more serious, and I'd rather devote my time worrying about these things. I don't want my friends to be viewed as shady, but they dug their own hole when they started lying about important things. As to the ruining their identity, maybe they feel more like themselves when they dye their hair. :shrug: I read in the "Don't make my brown eyes blue?" thread that some people just feel more like themselves with dyed hair or colored contacts. Either way, I was just offering my opinion.

candycandace
December 11th, 2011, 09:04 PM
I totally understand where you are coming from, and I don't think anyone likes being lied to, but in my case, I just have to stop caring. I've had friends lie about things that are way more serious, and I'd rather devote my time worrying about these things. I don't want my friends to be viewed as shady, but they dug their own hole when they started lying about important things. As to the ruining their identity, maybe they feel more like themselves when they dye their hair. :shrug: I read in the "Don't make my brown eyes blue?" thread that some people just feel more like themselves with dyed hair or colored contacts. Either way, I was just offering my opinion.
Yeah I totally agree with you there, I guess I just don't have to deal with serious things like that. I'm sorry you had to go though friends lieing about important things like that. And I really appreciate your opinion, thanks for sharing it. :)

Kira94
December 11th, 2011, 09:38 PM
I don't really see the point in lying about it. Especially if it was someone you had known before they got it dyed, that would just be silly.
Um, if it was someone I didn't know (and I somehow found out it was a lie) I might be a little miffed, but mostly just confused as to why they would lie. Although, to be honest, I probably wouldn't ask about their hair in the first place, so this theoretical story probably wouldn't even happen. :laugh:

Lici1209
December 11th, 2011, 09:42 PM
I can definitely understand why people would lie about it. The things we do to our hair (and faces and bodies) are things we do because we think it'll make us prettier - who would want to admit that they weren't born with it? It can make you feel less pretty.

I rarely have people ask about my hair, but when I do, I'm honest about it. It can turn into a long explanation if they haven't heard of henna. I don't usually ask other people about it though; it's usually obvious.

And I don't think anyone should hide anything like that from their spouse. My future husband will definitely see me makeup-less a lot, so I'd want to know beforehand that he still found me attractive that way :p

I agree, especially with the first part. People dye, usually, with the hopes of appearing naturally that color. I actually find it kind of rude if someone asks someone else if it's natural. If they want to tell you, they will! Also, it's not really a big deal, I wouldn't be devastated, personally.

LadyKate
December 11th, 2011, 11:00 PM
I have naturally quite light blonde hair, and when I was in high school people constantly asked me who colored my hair, how did I get it so blonde, etc. Then, when I went to college I started dying my hair red and people would say "you're so lucky you have hair that color, I've been trying to dye mine that color for years!" I always told them the brand and color I used. :) I always thought it was funny that more people assumed I dyed to get my natural color and that the dyed color was natural!

cooklaezo13
December 12th, 2011, 01:10 AM
I have naturally quite light blonde hair, and when I was in high school people constantly asked me who colored my hair, how did I get it so blonde, etc. Then, when I went to college I started dying my hair red and people would say "you're so lucky you have hair that color, I've been trying to dye mine that color for years!" I always told them the brand and color I used. :) I always thought it was funny that more people assumed I dyed to get my natural color and that the dyed color was natural!

That's soooooo funny because I used to get the same thing. My natural color is brown with blonde streaks in it. When I have my natural hair color, I get lots of people asking me at what salon do I get my highlights done, and I have to convince them that it's natural. I sooooo do NOT have the complexion to be a natural red head, but when I would dye my hair red with henna, many people who did not know me before I started hennaing would be convinced the red hair was natural and tell me how lucky I was to have it. If I was in a hurry I would just say "it's not natural" but if I had more time I would give them an education on henna.

Charlotte:)
December 12th, 2011, 01:28 AM
I would just assume they were telling the truth. Otherwise I wouln't really be offended, because those kinds of lies are often due to insecurity. What bothers me, though, is when other people accuse me of lying about my hair color (or any adult with blonde hair, because apparently it's not possible for anyone past puberty to have blonde hair). :rolleyes:

Springlets
December 12th, 2011, 02:00 AM
I do find it annoying because I think there is too much dyed hair in the world anyway and I think many people are forgetting what natural hair looks like. I don't ask the question much anymore myself since I can almost always tell if their hair is dyed so I would already know. If I did, I would ask in private since some people might be embarrassed or not want others to know.

Tota
December 12th, 2011, 03:06 AM
I never ask that question to anyone, because being a hair obsessed person makes me believe I can always tell when someone has natural hair color or not ;) I used to dye my hair for years but now I accepted myself the way I am and am all about natural ;) But when people ask me this question, which they do (more and more often), I never lie (but my hair IS virgin now). I hate it when I'm approached by strangers and when I kindly answer, they don't believe me. Maybe because of all the people, that lie about it? Or maybe because almost everyone dyes their hair here? I have friends that are dyeing their hair the same colour than their natural colour is because they found one or two gray hair on their head. And then they don't admit it, because if it is not different than their natural color, it doesn't count as a dye. Funny people, but what can you do ... :)

I also believe that if you lie about it to you husband, bf, family etc., there must be something wrong with you. If someone lies about such an unimportant thing, I wonder, what else must she/he be lying about? But I don't judge anyone because of their hair colour anyway, natural or not. I just observe what is happening with the people around me because I had a problem with accepting my hair color for a very long time. But I never lied about it ;)

Aveyronnaise
December 12th, 2011, 05:06 AM
Well I never really know what to say. For some reason I get asked this frequently , especially by men!?! I don't really understand why, I guess especially in the winter I have kind of a natural goth-ish complexion, due to mixed ancestry but I have even been asked if my hair is a wig !
Now I am grateful to have a bit of gray hair in front to point to lol. But I get confused on what to say because I did a henndigo to my hair in sept to try to get rid of some of the gray . Weirdly ( luckily) my hair is exactly the same warm black color as the dye , no one noticed any difference between that and my natural color... So what do I do , just say yeah or launch off into some detailed description ?
I don't know ,I don't really care if people dye their hair , but I wish more younger girls would let their blonette or lighter hair shine I think it looks so fresh and pretty, I also love the variety .

Chamy
December 12th, 2011, 05:14 AM
I dont really care about other peoples haircolour. I let them do their thing.

But if i did ask someone, and knew for sure that they lied i would think that they were kind of stupid for lying about such a ridiculous thing. :rolleyes:

candycandace
December 12th, 2011, 09:40 AM
I do find it annoying because I think there is too much dyed hair in the world anyway and I think many people are forgetting what natural hair looks like. I don't ask the question much anymore myself since I can almost always tell if their hair is dyed so I would already know. If I did, I would ask in private since some people might be embarrassed or not want others to know.
Yeah I know what you mean. I think it's a little arrogant to ask that question. Especially in front of a group of people. It does seem like people have forgotten what natural hair looks like. I've seen a lot of people trying to pull of some pretty outrageous reds, blondes and oranges as natrural and a lot of people fall for it because they don't know what natural blonde or red even looks like.

Aerin
December 12th, 2011, 10:30 AM
I actually could sort of see it. I'm a natural redhead, though my once bright red has gone pretty auburn. If I ended up henna-ing it in a few years, if someone asked me if I was a natural redhead I would probably say yes, since it's kind of part of my self-identity, but it wouldn't exactly be my natural color.

Though that particular situation isn't really what you're describing. Actually-this exact reason is why I haven't hennaed my hair yet. My BF says that once I do, I can't really say I'm a natural redhead anymore =).

McFearless
December 13th, 2011, 09:28 PM
I only ask that question to those I'm close to, and its always out of curiosity. Some people like to pull that "gotcha" when it comes to natural tan, hair colour, etc. I'm not like that. Natural colour or artificial, I'm impressed.

If someone was obviously lying I wouldn't be able to tell unless it shows in their hair. In those cases I would never ask that question to begin with.

Ceisdein
December 14th, 2011, 12:12 AM
It doesn't really bother me one way or the other. If lying about it makes them comfortable, more power to them. I'm gonna save my upset for bigger fish but I can see where it might annoy others.

Being asked if it's my natural color, that freaks me out though. Mostly because I don't really have a natural hair color so I don't know how to answer. I don't want to lie but I don't want to sit there for 10 minutes explaining it while they think "Good god, a yes or a no, that's all I was looking for." Plus some people are just goofy about it, and I don't know how to handle them either. I had a lady ask me if my hot pink hair was natural once. What do you do with that?

(Side note: For some reason I'm terrified of posting here. Scary!)

UltraBella
December 14th, 2011, 01:45 AM
Just out of curiosity do you (and anyone else) would think this looks natural?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6zzivbTnmA&list=PLA37EBC3AF31C333F&index=9&feature=plpp_video

I thought this video was totally relevant to the topic at hand, because it's demonstrating balayage highlights, which are about as soft and natural as you can get and still leave much of the natural hair color intact. So, if you ask if it is the model's natural hair color - she may respond yes, because much of her natural would be present still. Or she may answer no, because she has highlights. Both are true depending on your perspective. I think this gives an example of a situation where either answer may be true.


ETA : I edited my post because I was bothered by the exchange you and Lianna had, but I see that you two have made up elsewhere, so this portion of my post is no longer relevant.

Bene
December 14th, 2011, 01:46 AM
I've never asked anyone if their hair color was natural. It just never comes up and, to be honest about it, I don't really care whether or not somebody dyes their hair. If someone comes out of nowhere and tells me their hair color is natural, without me asking it or it not being part of the conversation, I'd assume there's something wrong with them :laugh:

Barniie
December 14th, 2011, 02:21 AM
You see, I dyed my hair darker (non-permanent) and it never fully came out, so i've lightened it back to basically normal. People ask if it's dyed, but I say no - it is my natural hair color, but it has been dyed... hope that made sense. But yes, I would feel lied to if someone said something very false (ie. "i'm a natural platinum blonde" when they are really brown"

kaned_ferret
December 14th, 2011, 02:51 AM
Hmm, I'm at an odd place with this question, because I wonder myself how I should answer it if/when asked...

I am a natural redhead, but as I have gotten older it has lightened from the shades I had as a child and young adult. Now I henna, and it has given me back my natural colour. So is it my natural colour? Well yes, in a way! So am I lying if I tell people that?

PriscillaCherel
December 14th, 2011, 02:55 AM
Ahh, I would never say that to somebody.. even if they get weard faces when I said it's not my real hair colour.

Katleen
December 14th, 2011, 03:29 AM
I wouldn't ask, and I find it a bit silly to lie about it, but it wouldn't bother me too much I guess...

@Diamond.Eyes: you have the most gorgeous color I have seen in years!!! Soooo beautiful...

Lianna
December 14th, 2011, 04:07 AM
I think if you rinse your hair with tea or coffee, that is not your color anymore. This new color is more vibrant, and probably what made that person ask about your haircolor in the first place.

A blonde will still remain a blonde, a redhead and brunette aswell. But this isn't your color, it's another shade. Are you lying when they ask "are you a natural blonde/redhead/brunette?" No. Are you lying is they ask "is that your natural hair color?" Yes.

ETA: same with henna..which is a natural hair colorant.

Oksana
December 14th, 2011, 04:27 AM
My issue isn't really with people lying about their hair colour but more with people not believing that someone's hair is their natural colour.

I actually had an argument with someone over my sisters hair colour this week. We are both blonde and our hair bleaches in the sun dramatically, especially in my sisters case.

On holiday it has become routine for me to braid my hair as this allows for the new roots to lighten in the sun. My sister never does this and her hair is always free flowing, consequently the top layer of her hair is literally 3-4 shades lighter than underside. A lady at my sisters school told me that my mother should be ashamed of herself for letting a 12 year old have highlights. She would not believe her hair was natural.

:disgust:

Some other members have said that they would be able to see if someone had bleached their hair due to roots. I have to jump in here and express that during the winter I have roots! I live in England and this means that from October to March i get about 2-3 inches of hair that is noticeably darker than my length. Then comes the summer and the sun bleaches my roots very light again.

maria_tasha
December 14th, 2011, 07:57 AM
I have very dark hair almost black and I get the "is this your natural hair color" question quite often and usually when I say yes the comeback is "I don't believe you. it's too dark". Ya as if my dark skin tone is just a coincidence and I dye my hair while I sleep and never remember it the next morning.

MandyBeth
December 14th, 2011, 10:19 AM
People ask me if my hair is it's natural color. Given as the ends are PURPLE, it's pretty blatantly obvious that no, it's not. So yeah, they get a smart alec answer that once my hair grows past my chin, it automatically turns purple.

Sad part, a good 9 out of 10 people believe that.

Carissamarie08
December 14th, 2011, 11:00 AM
To me if its red hair I can always tell whether its a naturla red or not..but other colors not so much.

ladylowtide
December 14th, 2011, 11:08 AM
I would feel sorry for the person that felt the need to lie. I used to have died platinum blonde hair, that some actually thought was natural (much to my surprise), and I replied to them, oh no, this is not natural, its been bleached like a thousand times :) When people ask me about my hair now I say, "No its less red, I 've hennaed my hair." If someone lied to me about whether their hair was natural or not, I just wouldn't take them seriously.

xoxophelia
December 14th, 2011, 12:46 PM
Seriously, if you know for sure they are lying, why ask in the first place? If you know the answer, don't ask. If you don't know for sure then you can't assume they are lying. I would side with the camp that it is too personal to ask. Most people ask that sort of thing only to make a person smaller in their mind or passive aggressively rip them down. If you are close friends with somebody, you already would know if they color their hair. So again.. why ask?

This question would bother me because people would assume my hair was highlighted and refuse to believe me when I said it wasn't. Even now as my roots grow out I am starting to get the questions again and I have been pretty good about keeping my hair out of the sun. It doesn't take much for me to get very blonde highlights. I can't stop them from happening. :shrug: