PDA

View Full Version : feeling down about my hair



bratz81
December 7th, 2011, 08:05 AM
This is probably more of a rant than anything and feel free to tell me if I'm being silly :)

I've been a member here since August and although I decided to grow my hair from short about a year before, I was bleaching, blow drying, straightening, you name it. So since joining I've been taking better care of my hair and am really pleased with the condition of it.

The main 'bulk' of my hair is just above APL by about an inch or so, and I have layers ranging from chin length to shoulder length. I didn't want these layers at the time and they were cut very unevenly.
I'm hoping to grow my hair to waist (for now!) and without layers which I know will take time.

Well the layers are totally bugging me. I can't do very many updos as they poke out, and I'm slowing learning to braid but it's hard with layers I find. They sit out funny some days and I think that they look really stupid being uneven and so on.

I'm getting married in June and want my hair a bit longer for then to have wavy and down - so a large part of me doesn't want to lose any length. Another part of me though is thinking just cut it all to shoulder length and get rid of most of the layers and start growing again. :confused:
Mind you, I am due on shortly and I always totally hate myself the week before so anything I dislike about my hair is magnified right now! Any advice on whether to cut or not, or how to love my hair more how it is while it grows?

chrystalevonne
December 7th, 2011, 08:11 AM
I am no expert but maybe you will be happier with the layers when the grow a bit past your shoulder. I bet it would totally change the way your hair falls and behaves. Hang in there, my hair is still pretty short and would die to have your hair right now. I have awkward stages as i grow my hair out that just kill me, maybe this is yours. Just wait it out and push through you will be happy you did!:o

bratz81
December 7th, 2011, 08:14 AM
chrystalevonne -I've grown it out form a pixie so I feel your pain on the awkwardness of some growing stages.
Maybe when they get longer they'll sit better, though my hair will have to be chopped at some point to even them up. Was planning on when the shortest layer got to APL or BSL kinda range to get it all cut the same length and then grow from there - but I'm just so frustrated with the stupid thing right now!

Of the Fae
December 7th, 2011, 08:39 AM
I wish you all the best :) My hair is only an inch and a half longer than yours, so I know how it feels. My grown out bangs keep flying out of my updo's..:P But in my experience, the longer it gets, the less noticeable the layers will be! They used to be much more annoying when my hair was shorter and I could only get the back in a ponytail and half would fall out after five minutes.
Hang in there!!! I'm certain that, if your keep taking good care of it, your hair will be much longer in june :)

bratz81
December 7th, 2011, 08:42 AM
Of the Fae, thanks it's good to hear from people of a similar or slightly longer length to see how other people deal with it :)
I'm guessing by June it'll only be around 3 inches longer (half inch per month plus possibly a trim) so I'm not expecting miracles by a long shot I just wish it was longer now :)

Amber_Maiden
December 7th, 2011, 09:39 AM
I think you should grow out the layers- don't get your hair cut!

ElusiveMuse
December 7th, 2011, 09:41 AM
My advice is to be patient with your hair, don't do anything without thinking it over for some time, and be open to a wedding hairstyle that makes you look beautiful even if it isn't necessarily hair-down.

I know it is frustrating. But it is worth it to compromise and lose length for the better of your hair overall, in the end.

bratz81
December 8th, 2011, 01:00 PM
Hey guys, sorry for the late reply I couldn't get on LHC for a while.
Thanks for the advice and you're right - doing something on the spur of the moment is not a good idea! And maybe once it gets down a bit the layers may not annoy me so much.

I'm thinking if I can finally master french braiding it might help me keep it out of the way and not looking so bad

ladyshep
December 8th, 2011, 01:21 PM
That's the trouble with growing out hair. Dissatissfaction and awkward stages. That's why so many get there hair cut off.
So you're at an awkward stage, you may just like what your hair looks like long with the layers in it. You never know what your hair will turn out to be like. It changes as the journey continues. Patience is the key. You could try putting your hair up in different styles or try a different shampoo. Hope this helps. Good luck!

Amazinggrace
December 8th, 2011, 01:37 PM
I agree with all the other ladies. The awkward stages are really hard, but remember they will still be there if you cut and try again. Once all the layers get past your shoulders they won't fall in front so much and you will be able to french braid them in better.

I used this style clip to hold my flyaways in when my hair was shoulder length and a little longer: http://www.amazon.com/Scunci-No-slip-Clips-6-Count-Colors/dp/B001SXNQDG/ref=pd_sim_bt_1

ATrixie
December 8th, 2011, 03:05 PM
Honey, you are due soon!! :) I'm thinking this means a baby is coming? :)

Think about the baby, the hair will have plenty of time to recuperate 'till June!! :)

You've been eating for two now, so the hair maybe didn't get that much nutrients - I found my hair grew quickly when I was eating more protein, there are some other nutrition tips for hair online too.. :)
The most important is to eat healthy for the baby and to be healthy!! The rest will sort itself out!!

When I was growing my hair from short to longer, there were layers and all that - some people even thought I cut my hair on purpose that way!! So, you never know what others may be thinking!
Some hairdos with layers are VERY beautiful!! (I used to get compliments on my hair lol!)

Yeah, the flyaways could be a bit annoying, I experimented with hairpins - and really had FUN with them - different styles and COLORS and all!! (Hey, you can blame it on baby mania, and those cute colorful baby clothes, for inspiration?? :))

Maybe you could also be lacking magnesium and/or some other nutrients, check you get plenty of food that has magnesium and other good vitamins and minerals! (Lack of magnesium can make people worry too much too! :) Personal experience! Omega 3/fish oil/fatty fish can help here too - just make sure it's without mercury! Personally I prefer food rather than supplements..)

((Hugs)) Fingers crossed it gets better soon!! :)

moxamoll
December 8th, 2011, 03:15 PM
Hmmm... I read it as you were going to start your period soon. Are you pregnant? Either way, hormones are not often contributors to good decision making! Wait til that's settled down before you do anything drastic.

I have so many friends who say they want long hair, but then chop it back when it hits the awkward stage. So which type are you gonna be? For me, the only way to get passed these stages is benign neglect. I just put a head band on or do whatever style seems to work without thinking about it at all and go about my life. Then it's 4 or 5 months later and the whole situation has changed!

I kept my hair about shoulder length until I had grown out the layers, but that's just what works for me. Whatever you do, good luck!

bratz81
December 9th, 2011, 04:02 AM
OMG no not pregnant! due on my period. Nope pregnancies here no way! Can't believe that was read as being pregnant...

Anyways the layers were cut on purpose by the hairdresser but not asked for by me. Plus she made a complete mess of them. People probably think I asked for this style yeah, just to me it looks stupid.

I do want long hair and know this is an awkward phase. I went through similar when the longest bits were at shoulder length. I think the different lengths are annoying me more right now than they were. I hate layers in my hair, always have and want rid of them!

torn between growing the layers out bit by bit, or all at once, though everyone is right doing this when hormonal and due on my period is not a good time so won't be doing anything drastic :)

dulce
December 9th, 2011, 12:44 PM
I grew mine from a pixie 3 years ago and kept my layers till I was overall BSL,then decided to grow them out as well as my overall length.My shortest layer was collarbone length at that time.Now I'm at waist with past APL layers and the layers are long enough to do any hairdo without them popping out.So my vote is hang in there,keep growing and eventually the layers get so long they blend in with the rest of your hair and are no longer a problem with buns etc. If you cut ,you still have to go through the akward stage,why do it twice?If you grit your teeth and grow ,and find easy styles to put it up with,like french twist or a beak clip coiled mini bun,or tails up with a flexi clip ,it makes it easier.

jacqueline101
December 9th, 2011, 12:57 PM
Grow it out and the layers might become something you like when they're longer. I like my layers which are side layers now that they're longer.

Katleen
December 9th, 2011, 01:07 PM
I have the exact same problem as you, with layers ranging from chin to shoulderlength down to my shoulderblades. This makes it look really big and puffy in my neck, and I can't wear it loose...

I keep it in updo's most of the time, or in a ponytail, just until it grows a bit longer and the bulk of my hair gets lower on my back, it should look a lot different by then...

Hang in there, and don't make any hormonal decisions you might regret later :-)

swearnsue
December 9th, 2011, 02:53 PM
I'm growing out my hair and it's all different weird lengths. I suggest you try using the Caruso hair curling system on your hair. When my hair is curled it looks pretty good, the shorter hair gives it a bit of "interest" or "character" if that makes any sense. Soft waves or curls might be just the thing to get you past the awkward phase. Your hair probably looks a lot better than you think it does. Oh, and you can use aloe vera gel (NOT one with alcohol) to slick down the hairs that stick out of buns and braids.

bratz81
December 9th, 2011, 03:09 PM
I don't think I can get the Caruso set in the uk but I do use rollers in it now and then at weekends mainly.
I've never liked layers in my hair even when they're longer so they'll be going soon enough. I'll probably wait til the shortest is at APL then cut back to there. That's past the awkward shoulder length :)

shesasmartass
December 9th, 2011, 04:06 PM
I know I will face those awkward hair moments soon. I am growing my hair out from a pixie and it is just at my ears. I always get freaked out when it gets to a chin length bob because I can feel it move then I chop it off and regret it.

I encourage you from a person who is starting the hair journey from the beginning to look at what you have already accomplished as far as hair growth and be resolute in your goals.

I am going to take my own advice this time and persevere. Good luck on your "hair" growth journey.

mneh
December 9th, 2011, 05:02 PM
This is probably more of a rant than anything and feel free to tell me if I'm being silly :)

I've been a member here since August and although I decided to grow my hair from short about a year before, I was bleaching, blow drying, straightening, you name it. So since joining I've been taking better care of my hair and am really pleased with the condition of it.

The main 'bulk' of my hair is just above APL by about an inch or so, and I have layers ranging from chin length to shoulder length. I didn't want these layers at the time and they were cut very unevenly.
I'm hoping to grow my hair to waist (for now!) and without layers which I know will take time.

Well the layers are totally bugging me. I can't do very many updos as they poke out, and I'm slowing learning to braid but it's hard with layers I find. They sit out funny some days and I think that they look really stupid being uneven and so on.

I'm getting married in June and want my hair a bit longer for then to have wavy and down - so a large part of me doesn't want to lose any length. Another part of me though is thinking just cut it all to shoulder length and get rid of most of the layers and start growing again. :confused:
Mind you, I am due on shortly and I always totally hate myself the week before so anything I dislike about my hair is magnified right now! Any advice on whether to cut or not, or how to love my hair more how it is while it grows?

Hiya, don't let the blob encourage you to make a hasty decision. Since March 2010 I've been growing out a heavily layered and thinned style, my shortest layers were above my ears. I went through a few awkward stages but now that my shortest layers are approaching collarbone length they're behaving themselves more. Length and weight help a lot. Also, messy side plaits are really trendy atm, apparently layers sticking out of the plaits is what you want (most models and actresses have lots of layers in their hair so I can see why the messy look took off). Messy updos are also fairly popular, again because layered hair is ubiquitous.

I almost cut my damaged and layered hair off (a few times) but I'm glad I waited a wee while till I cheered up.

ETA: Wearing your hair wavy will help hide the unevenness of your layers - it certainly hides most of my layer-related diffs.

jojo
December 9th, 2011, 05:10 PM
stick with it, been there and feel your frustration. I promise it does get better once your passed apl.