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View Full Version : Advice for when it gets difficult...



Lici1209
December 4th, 2011, 07:45 PM
So after all my hard work, I'm just about at BSL. I know it's not as much time and effort as most of you ladies, but I've NEVER had my hair anywhere near this length. So just about the past 2 months I've been getting horrible snarls. So tight I can't move them when I try to use my fingers to detangle, and I end up tearing through my hair :( This has caused some breakage. Tonight, I'm so upset about this, I just want to cut my hair. I feel like my hair has always been in such good condition but now with some parts breaking off, I feel just...disheartened. I don't really want to cut, I made a goal of about 4 more inches and I want to reach it, but I also want my hair in good condition. Any advice to keep me from cutting it? (Unless you really think I need to...then say it :])

Lianna
December 4th, 2011, 07:55 PM
Check out the tangle teezer thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=9334). :)

ETA: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-O7GY_VNns

Miss Catrina
December 4th, 2011, 07:56 PM
When does it tangle? You may just need to be more rigorous about putting it up or braiding it, or be more careful handling it during washing and drying.

A -trim- (not a cut) really might be a good way to go if additional caution doesn't help. If your ends are at all split or roughed up, they could be causing tangles.

luckyduck
December 4th, 2011, 07:59 PM
You may just have some build up, and need to clarify. Also, why don't you try finger combing for awhile, that way you can be more gentle when you run into a snarl. I sometimes have to put a small amount of light oil on my fingers if I encounter a bad snarl, then I pull gently on a single hair in the snarl, until I work it free. I keep on until every hair is loose. I may have to clip a little but if you rip it, your long hair journey will be more difficult, and not nearly as fun.

You are also getting to one of the difficult stages of hair growth, if you can hang on a little while longer, you will begin to have more updo options that will protect those ends.

Kelikea
December 4th, 2011, 08:00 PM
How do you wash/condition your hair now? Are the ends dry, split, or just tangled? If they feel "crunchy" you might need to clarify and then do a moisture treatment. Do you use any heat?

shikara
December 4th, 2011, 09:21 PM
I was at that point about this time last year, snarls that didnt want to go away. Have yiu been doing anything differently? Missing any steps you used to take? Wheb yiu are done washing, do yiu rinse with ACV or dilued lemon juice? This made a world of difference for me. My hair does not like ACV but it really likes lemon juice. Are yiu using any oils for deep conditioning? Have you been trying out too many different methods at once? Just some things to consider. I hooe you find your answer PDQ!!

Lici1209
December 4th, 2011, 09:27 PM
I don't use heat at all :] Currently, I shampoo every other day with Yes to Tomatoes Volumizing Shampoo and condition with some 'cone conditioner that I've been trying the past few weeks...could it be the silicone? I wasn't using it until pretty recently and the tangling got bad about two months ago. I s&d every few weeks as well.

I guess I take it as a good sign no one is saying "CUT YOUR HAIR NOW!" So I think I'll stick with a trim.

Also, excuse my ignorance, but how is a tangle teezer much different than a brush or comb? I've heard about it before (and watched that video) but I'm skeptical because I don't get how it works :P

Thank you guys, the biggest thing is it's nice to know my hair journey might not be over :]

kidari
December 4th, 2011, 09:38 PM
Usually a clarifying shampoo and a deep moisture treatment followed by a small trim works wonders. Sometimes just the clarifying shampoo and deep conditioning is all you needed and you can wait longer on the trim.

Roseate
December 4th, 2011, 09:43 PM
You also might want to try a club soda rinse after your clarifying/deep conditioning: it works to remove mineral deposits from your hair. I did this recently and was really surprised at the difference it made!

Miss Catrina
December 4th, 2011, 09:48 PM
I don't use heat at all :] Currently, I shampoo every other day with Yes to Tomatoes Volumizing Shampoo and condition with some 'cone conditioner that I've been trying the past few weeks...could it be the silicone? I wasn't using it until pretty recently and the tangling got bad about two months ago. I s&d every few weeks as well.

I guess I take it as a good sign no one is saying "CUT YOUR HAIR NOW!" So I think I'll stick with a trim.

Also, excuse my ignorance, but how is a tangle teezer much different than a brush or comb? I've heard about it before (and watched that video) but I'm skeptical because I don't get how it works :P

Thank you guys, the biggest thing is it's nice to know my hair journey might not be over :]

Oooh. OT, but how do you like that shampoo? I've been thinking of trying it for some time. I think Shampure is still a little harsh for me.

Lianna
December 4th, 2011, 10:20 PM
Also, excuse my ignorance, but how is a tangle teezer much different than a brush or comb? I've heard about it before (and watched that video) but I'm skeptical because I don't get how it works :P

The bristles are very bendy, they can almost form a loop, and snap back, isn't like a regular brush at all. They work with your hair, not agaisnt it. They also have two different lengths which allows to detangle much faster, like a 2 in 1 sweep.

It detangles extremely tangled hair in seconds or at least cuts down several minutes of the original detangling routine (for those who need more than 30 minutes).

I wish I still had the torrinpaige video link...she detangled half her hair with a wide tooth comb (took a little while) and then the other half with the tangle teezer in like 3 seconds...it was quite impressive.

Of course if the cause of your extreme tangling isn't "natural" like if you have build-up or such, you should adress that problem first. But I don't have extreme tangles and I still use it because it's just so amazing and leaves my hair very soft, almost like a BBB but I don't need to section it in 10 parts like I do with the BBB (thick hair). Bottom line...I just recommend it anyway. :)

Lici1209
December 5th, 2011, 12:43 PM
Oooh. OT, but how do you like that shampoo? I've been thinking of trying it for some time. I think Shampure is still a little harsh for me.

I love it! I used head and shoulders and other harsh sulfate shampoos before, then switched to this and I don't think I'll ever go back :]

Lici1209
December 5th, 2011, 12:45 PM
The bristles are very bendy, they can almost form a loop, and snap back, isn't like a regular brush at all. They work with your hair, not agaisnt it. They also have two different lengths which allows to detangle much faster, like a 2 in 1 sweep.

It detangles extremely tangled hair in seconds or at least cuts down several minutes of the original detangling routine (for those who need more than 30 minutes).

I wish I still had the torrinpaige video link...she detangled half her hair with a wide tooth comb (took a little while) and then the other half with the tangle teezer in like 3 seconds...it was quite impressive.

Of course if the cause of your extreme tangling isn't "natural" like if you have build-up or such, you should adress that problem first. But I don't have extreme tangles and I still use it because it's just so amazing and leaves my hair very soft, almost like a BBB but I don't need to section it in 10 parts like I do with the BBB (thick hair). Bottom line...I just recommend it anyway. :)

Good to know! I'll have to get one then, thanks!

I'll try to clarify and moisturize and see how it is after, thanks everyone!

beccababesx
December 5th, 2011, 01:52 PM
Another vote for the Tangle Teezer - I don't know how or why it works, but when I literally cannot get a brush through my hair, the Tangle Teezer slides through. It's bizarre in an awesome way.

jacqueline101
December 5th, 2011, 02:19 PM
Its time for a trim and maybe clarify see what's going on.

CopperSilver
December 5th, 2011, 04:25 PM
Here's Torrin's review of the Tangle Teezer on damp hair:
http://www.youtube.com/user/torrinpaige#p/c/423A81274B23EFB3/5/4Ez7ciiZtQ0
And here's Squiggyflop's video on dry hair:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-O7GY_VNns

I've got one but I don't like it much, mostlt because of the scratchy noise it makes. It didn't perform miracles on my hair like everyone else, so was a bit of a let down! Perhaps my hair is too short to notice a difference from a normal brush/comb.

Chamy
December 6th, 2011, 02:59 AM
I have been at that point too. It is really annoying, but i managed to handle it by S&Ding out the hairs that caused the tangles. And of course the tangle teezer, it has made wonders with my hair! I really recommend it. Since i have been using it my hair has behaved very well, and i haven't had any troubles with tangles.

Lici1209
December 6th, 2011, 11:43 AM
I have been at that point too. It is really annoying, but i managed to handle it by S&Ding out the hairs that caused the tangles. And of course the tangle teezer, it has made wonders with my hair! I really recommend it. Since i have been using it my hair has behaved very well, and i haven't had any troubles with tangles.

Well I'm glad it's not a dead end! I'll just press on with growing and treating it better, rather than starting over :]

ladyshep
December 6th, 2011, 12:03 PM
If you want to spend the money, you could try biolage detangler. You could also try antisnap by Redken. Like someone else said you could try clarifying and then moisturize. Your hair will constantly change as it grows longer.. I don't use the same products I did when I started because my hair has different needs. You will have to try things until you find something that works for your hair and so on. It is a journey.

SpinDance
December 6th, 2011, 01:10 PM
You've gotten lots of good advice already so I won't repeat, but I did wonder reading your post how you usually go about detangling. Tough snarls that don't want to come loose with fingers sound like a red flag to me. Are you doing the detangling starting at the top then getting to the bottom only to find that it's tangling up? This can work when your hair is short, but not so well once you get some length on it. Whether you use fingers, comb or whatever, start an inch from the very ends, then go up an inch and repeat until you get to the top. Work in sections. You don't have curls to contend with, but loose or broken hairs can cause a world of trouble. S&D out any broken or split hairs whenever you see them, and hairs that have been tightly tangled so that the hair is deformed (tight curls like ribbons get when you run your fingernail or the scissors on them, or sharp angles where it has been badly bent). Cutting those damaged hairs out and carefully getting shed hairs out makes a world of difference in how easy it is to get and keep your hair detangled.

Also, for what it's worth, detangled hair is like a sharp knife. Keep a knife sharp and it's always sharp and ready for use. Keep your hair detangled, as much as possible, and it will get into much less trouble/tangles.

gracenotes
December 6th, 2011, 01:17 PM
I had the same problem at BSL too. For me, it was because I had been wearing it down (and sleeping with it loose). It rubbed against clothing, got dry, collected lint...and then tangled like crazy. I'm also very split-end prone, and the mechanical damage of my hair rubbing against sweaters and winter coats left me with lots of split ends at the back of my neck. I found it very helpful to keep my hair up during the day and braided at nighttime. I also started using coconut oil, which helped keep moisture in. I don't know if you regularly wear your hair up already, but that made a huge difference for me. :)

Anje
December 6th, 2011, 01:38 PM
My usual advice that fits for most folks is to clarify and deep condition (SMT is great for this), then re-assess. Sometimes a trim will still be needed, but often it's a problem of buildup and/or dryness.

Also, if you're not currently, it's time to start wearing your hair in contained style if you don't have a specific reason for it to be loose. Braids are good, buns with the ends tucked in are often better. That will cut down on the chances for your hair to tangle and on the friction the ends receive, so you'll get fewer tangles and less damage.

Lici1209
December 6th, 2011, 07:53 PM
I usually wear my hair up every other day...sometimes a bit less! Clearly it's not enough >.< I'm just not very adept at doing hairstyles, so my options currently are ponytails or simple buns. I'll have to start looking into some other styles :]

Also, for cases like this weekend, I didn't put my hair up so that was probably a huge contributor!

I haven't been trimming bent hairs, but now I'll have to try it :]

Delila
December 6th, 2011, 08:07 PM
How often do you detangle?

For me, it's all about tangle management. :)

Working from the hemline up, and being gentle is key.

I keep my hair up, or in a braid if I'm out of the house, so most days I detangle in the morning as I undo my night braid and make an updo for the day, and detangle again at bedtime as I'm making my night braid.

If I wear it down, I detangle/comb every time I get back home or indoors where I have privacy enough to get it done. My hair tends to be pretty floaty, so any breeze is more than enough to undo all the detangling I've done. That's the main reason I wear it up or braided pretty much all the time if I'm planning to leave the house.

It's my experience that most big parking lots are hugely windy, at least in this area, and the wind wreaks havoc on my hair if it's down. That's 99% of the reason I keep it contained.

luckyduck
December 6th, 2011, 09:37 PM
A ponytail would not be my first choice. It may keep it out of your face but it isn't really as protective as you might think. Those ends may having a crazy tangle party back there!