Help! I can't find a good hair routine

[flourish]

I have frizzy thick 2b-3a hair- some ringlet curls, some waves, and a lot of slightly waved poof. I'm trying to grow my hair to waist length and am currently stuck at just below shoulder length. This tends to be my problem length- I hit this point and then spend months and months here without much discernible change.

I have absolutely no idea what to do with my hair to cut down on frizz and increase moisture. I've tried co-washing, no poo, using natural shampoos and the more common drugstore brands, tried deep conditioners (olive oil, placenta, weekly masks, leave-in conditioners, etc), and have stopped using any heat styling. I've also tried using combs and fingers intead of brushes. (Though at this point I'm so tired of the ungodly ugliness of my snarled air dried hair that I usually brush it out and pull it up in a ponytail/headband.)

My hair stays the same, though. The only difference I've found after using these different routines is that after using conditioners/deep conditioners my hair might feel softer but it is still frizzy and feels greasy/weighed down. If I use combs/don't touch my hair it still dries into a snarled tangled mess of frizz/half-heated waves. I have chemically dyed my hair in the past month or so, but this problem started long before that.

Any advice? I'm at my wits end here. I just want shiny (well, shinier), soft, less frizzy long hair and I don't see that happening anytime soon. :(

[celebriangel]

My experience? My hair just *doesn't* sit nicely until APL. (I have 2c/3a hair).

CO washing, realistically, is a good option to reduce frizz. If you hair is damaged, though, it will probably frizz until the damage is cut off. However, CO washing requires some experimentation - post on the CO thread or here exactly how you were doing it so you can get some suggestions to how it will work for you.

I damp bun my hair to let it dry, which cuts down significantly on frizz. It does mean my wurls relax though. Damp oiling is also my saviour for keeping my hair moisturised.

Do you have buildup? Cones give me serious frizz, particularly when they;re excessive. Try clarifying then doing an SMT to see what happens.

[Shelly]

Have you clarified your hair at all? That may be a good place to start. It also sounds like there's chemical damage and possibly heat damage as well. I know my hair was all kinds of frizzy back when I did use heat to style it all the time.

[owlathena]

I also recommend clarifying!

[isabelx]

My hair was similar to yours when I first joined LHC, clarifying is definitely a must, I love the way my hair feels after a good clarify :inlove:

[flourish]

What's a good clarifying brand to try? (Especially inexpensive drugstore brands--I'm a poor grad student lol.)

Also, I know I have damage from dying and heat styling, but it seems like even my natural hair is as damaged. I dye my hair every so often (3 times this year) and use heat styling maybe 5 times a year for really special occasions but my hair remains frizzy, so idk.

Is it a good idea to wear my hair in buns? I already wear it up most the time anyway and I hear bunning can reduce damage.

[isabelx]

I use Pantene Pro V Clarifying Shampoo :)

[ElusiveMuse]

I recommend slowing down! Too much experimentation and too many new products can make it difficult to figure out what works for your hair.

The best thing for taming my own frizz was ACV rinsing and daily oiling (mostly with coconut oil but I also love Nightblooming Triple Moon oil).

[spidermom]

My hair needs length to lay nicely, too. It gets wide before it gets long.
http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c79/spidermom/BOONEW.jpg
That's natural air-dried hair.

One thing that helped was to finger-comb some sort of moisturizing styling gel through my hair. It helped things clump together and form waves and curls rather than having each hair take off on its own trajectory to float around my hair like frizzy dandelion fluff.
http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c79/spidermom/LONGERSTILL.jpg
It had grown out a little more, too.

If you want to stay as natural as possible, try aloe vera gel (the clear stuff) with 1 or 2 drops of oil mixed.

The CWC washing routine with diluted shampoo and pre-wash coconut oiling turned out to be my holy grail of hair care.

[flourish]

Thanks for the advice everyone! I bought some clarifying shampoo yesterday and am going to see if that helps.