Teenage advice? major low self esteem.

[colormeindie]

there are so many girls in my school that have waist length or longer hair. at least 90% of them at least.
i cant help but feel extremely jealous. I usually just come home and cry out my self esteem issues but nothing ever helps. I have to get a few blood tests soon about anemia, my heart issues, and whether im going to die or not if i stay a devout vegetarian. I'm extremely stressed with school this year and i feel just ready to explode.

Every time i try to get rid of stress something else comes along and makes it worse.

i don't know what to do. my hair is falling out, i cry daily, im always irritable, and im not doing well in school. Even though im a 3.8 GPA student and up :( its just not a good year i guess.

oh, and i must apologize for my bad grammar. im just a mess. :(

[irishlady]

((HUGS)) I don't have any advice because I am going through a similar rough patch health wise. But just wanted you to know you are not alone. Hope things improve soon! :)

[FrozenBritannia]

there are so many girls in my school that have waist length or longer hair. at least 90% of them at least.
i cant help but feel extremely jealous. I usually just come home and cry out my self esteem issues but nothing ever helps. I have to get a few blood tests soon about anemia, my heart issues, and whether im going to die or not if i stay a devout vegetarian. I'm extremely stressed with school this year and i feel just ready to explode.

Every time i try to get rid of stress something else comes along and makes it worse.

i don't know what to do. my hair is falling out, i cry daily, im always irritable, and im not doing well in school. Even though im a 3.8 GPA student and up :( its just not a good year i guess.

oh, and i must apologize for my bad grammar. im just a mess. :(

Ah, highschool... Seriously though, I like your hair, and in my mind it is long as it is twice as long as mine! If your hair is falling out, there are things you can try, like switching to a sulphate free shampoo (which helped me) and there are threads about castor oil and monistat too. Being a vegetarian won't kill you as long as you get enough nutrients from the other foods that you eat (This means you have to eat more than salad and french fries my dear- I've been there too)
By far the most important thing that you should know is that crying is okay. And that once you are out of school, there is a high likely hood that you will never see any of those girls again unless you choose to do so, and so it's better to just focus on your school work. While long hair might be the norm at your school, it is not everywhere, and school work, while boring, doesn't ever hurt your feelings. Try to tell yourself something positive every day, and if you take care of your hair then it will look far nicer than theirs no matter the length!

[MsBubbles]

I'm really sorry you're anxious and down! I have been there, especially when I was your age. Please please do go to the doctor's as soon as possible to get some tests done, specifically for anemia! Take care of yourself and don't worry about all those other girls. They're probably just going to lop off all their hair in a year anyway ;).

[Juneii]

Hair is hair, and what makes it beautiful is the way you wear it. What does it matter if those girls do have beautiful hair? It doesn't make yours any less. It should not be a competition, thinking this way is unhealthy and makes you feel worse. I suggest a therapist or talk to someone to help you with your self esteem issues - it's best if it is face to face. You don't have to go through it alone. And trust me, you aren't alone. I went through hating myself in high school too, and still feel that way time to time right now. Life sucks but it doesn't mean you can't do anything about it. Feel better :) :grouphug:

[longhairedlady]

I am a vegetarian and you have to be diligent about making sure you are getting all the proper food groups, especially protein! It is very important for your mind, body, and hair! :) Dont feel bad about yourself by comparing yourself to others! You have very pretty hair and nobody has the same hair! We are all different and everyone has strong points and weak points. Just look at it this way, you will be to waist length soon enough so enjoy the lower maintenance for now! :)

[kitmarlow]

Before you do anything, consider that (possibly because of a poorer diet), you may just need more dietary fat. Contrary to popular belief, dietary fat does not cause body fat, but it does have an important effect on your mental health and hair/skin/nail health. I had a lot of troubles when I was a teen and didn't realize it may have just been a fat deficiency until a few months ago. I put more fat in my diet (bc I started eating meat again, but it wouldn't have been necessary) and have been feeling a lot better, calmer, less stressed. My hairs are growing like mad and look shiny and healthy and my nails are a lot less brittle. My skin is a different story, but it will always be.

[allnight avenue]

Judging by your profile pictures, you hair is absolutely lovely as-is. And it will grow. Also, here's a little secret.......in a year or two when you graduate, you're going to go to college. Girls LOVE to cut their hair off when they go to college. They think it makes them look more mature or something. Pretty soon you'll be the person with the longest hair that you know. Seriously.

But for the present, write and paint and draw your troubles away, and take care of your hair, and you will soon be feeling differently, I promise. :)

[racrane]

Aw, honey. Your hair is beautiful. It will grow. And honestly? A LOT of girls cut their long hair after high school. Your hair will most certainly be the envy when you graduate and go on to the next stage of your life.

I am a vegetarian and I really recommend going to a dietician. Even for a couple sessions, it helps to evaluate how you're eating. I still struggle to eat a solid amount of protein and fat, as strange as that sounds.

Crying is okay. High school can be awful. I really sympathize. It doesn't last forever, though. Try to find things to relax you. I take care of my cat and go for walks.

Take care of yourself. A high GPA is great, but your health is more important than a GPA.

[Yame]

I don't think there is anything wrong with you. You are a teenager... and this is what it feels like to be a teenager, at least for most girls, I think.

Do your best to try to stop comparing yourself to other people... focus on the positive aspects of who you are, and try to improve where there is room for improvement (for example, doing better in school). Don't beat yourself up for not being "good enough" at whatever, just think of yourself as a work in progress and try to do better next time. So if you want longer hair, treat your hair well and try to grow it longer. If you want to do better in school, study and focus to do better.

I also suggest that you look for a hobby, if you don't already have one... something that you enjoy doing, which can give you a sense of self, of usefulness, etc. It could be a sport, or dancing, or singing, or playing an instrument, or a martial art, or sewing, or painting, or doing hair, whatever. Find something that you love to do, and do it. Teens who are able to spend their time working on a skill are less likely to be depressed... at the very least, you'd have something to distract you from your troubles, and eventually this would help you gain confidence in yourself.

[mariazelie]

I think High School is something you just survive. I didn't do so well myself, but after it was over, things improved. There is too much pressure and comparison. Focus on your positives and do not spend time alone dwelling on the negatives. I know this isn't going to solve your problems, but I really do know how you feel. You are not alone, as you can see from all these loving posts.

[QueenJoey]

*hugs* Everything is gonna be okay, fellow long haired teenager!

[emelnd]

You are very cute, and I love your cat's eye necklace.

High school always feels bad... I hope everything comes out good healthwise, don't worry, it probably will be.

As for being vegetarian, just make sure you are getting the right kinds of protein.

Hang in there...

[templeofvenus]

I hope you feel better about things soon teenage years can be tough but what you feel is probably just low self image/esteem we all get that and really it is in our own heads I bet you are gorgeous!...get some proper advice on being vegetarian so you do it properly and get all the right vitamins and minerals you need to be fit- if you want to be veggie that is great but do it safely for your body :)

[alwayssmiling]

I think you look lovely. My daughter finds high school a struggle. An hour doing her hair in the morning, 5 mins on her breakfast lol. She has the most adorable hair which most of us would aspire to, but she comes home feel down about it. Its the fashion for shorter hair at her school. They are all having shoulder length bobs or that half shaved affair. So although she is absolutely beautiful she doesn't feel very cool. She wore it in loose braids the other day and a mean girl made a nasty comment - makes me mad.

My point is....there will be many, many other girls that seem very confident at school, but will probably go home and cry or feel anxious because of their appearance. You need to find your confidence thats all. Good luck and chin up!

Edit: forgot to say - comparing yourself against others is a recipe for disaster, be yourself!

[Purdy Bear]

First of all I dont have any hair including body hair, so yep Iv been there, seen it, done it worn the tshirt.

Get into relaxation, try some sports, sing, dance, do yoga or meditation. You need to get your stress levels down.

Look at what your eatting, make sure your getting plenty of biotin, protein and have all your vitamins and minerals covered. Vegetarianism is ok but not everyones body can take it - if its not due to belief nor allergy/sensitivity you maybe asked to add some sort of meat or fish to your diet. Just think about it!

For your studies make sure your organised, and watch everything you can find on you tube - theres lots of A grade students on there passing on tips. Look under back to school organisation, study tips, memory skills and study skills. There are also extra lessons on virtually every subject under the sun - I know Iv learnt an awful lot.

School is hard but its not as hard as full time work - you dont get the breaks between classes, and the holidays - nor is it (Iv been told) as hard as College and University. Get yourself sorted now with good daily practices and it will set you up for life.

Everyday, and everytime you feel your not good enough stop yourself short and say well if Im not no one else is, infact I am so worthy its unreal. Im intelligent, beautiful, and a wonderful person and believe it, cause you are!

[misspurdy06]

Being a teenager sucks. That eventually goes away with age lol.

The best thing you can do right now is go out with friends and family.

Hanging out with other people will keep you out of your own head which can be a scary place for a young woman.

The only cure for being a teen is distraction.

[emelnd]

I think you look lovely. My daughter finds high school a struggle. An hour doing her hair in the morning, 5 mins on her breakfast lol. She has the most adorable hair which most of us would aspire to, but she comes home feel down about it. Its the fashion for shorter hair at her school. They are all having shoulder length bobs or that half shaved affair. So although she is absolutely beautiful she doesn't feel very cool. She wore it in loose braids the other day and a mean girl made a nasty comment - makes me mad.

My point is....there will be many, many other girls that seem very confident at school, but will probably go home and cry or feel anxious because of their appearance. You need to find your confidence thats all. Good luck and chin up!

Edit: forgot to say - comparing yourself against others is a recipe for disaster, be yourself!

When I was in high school I wore my hair in braids one day and one girl made a nasty comment about village girls. And then a celebrity had her hair in braids and the same girl was in braids constantly. Makes me mad too.

[Lady Neeva]

It's okay, being a teenager can be hard.
Also, it's okay if you're hair's BSL, you'll soon get to hip. (And I would die for your honey-brown waves, I'm stuck with 1a hair. And a oily scalp)
And you're a vegan? Lucky! I can never be a vegan, given if I tried to, I would starve within a day.

[PinkyCat]

Let me tell you a funny story - hopefully it will cheer you up. :D

When I was in high school a few hundred years ago, there was this one absolutely gorgeous girl with super long, thick beautiful hair. I thought she was sooooo perfect. She was a godawful stuck-up snot ball though. Spoiled brat.

So one day as I was standing there in the hall with my frizzy, dull, puffy rat nest (because I had no idea what to do with my curls) I saw the girl come out of a class room looking absolutely perfect in a cute little skirt. Next thing I know she was arguing snottily with a guy from the class. Before I could think another thought - the guy pulled her skirt up over her head like a net and spun her around! :tongue::laugh:OMG the whole school was laughing so hard - I was doubled over crying! She had little shorts under the skirt, so no big deal but - seriously it was like something you see on a cartoon!

Sorry if irrelevant - but hope made you smile :rolling:

[Blackfire]

Im vegan and when I was 13 I lost amost all my hair. EVERYONE told me I had to eat meat, doctors my parents, everyone. I demanded some more tests and guess what? I HAVE HOSHIMOTOS DISEASE! Its a thyroid problem that causes hair loss, wieght gain, and lethargy.
after being accused of making my own hair fall out, of being fat, and lazy and then finding out its all due to a disease.... pretty crazy! I got some meds that fixed everything.

Now Im twenty two, my hair is only shoulder length, and it grew back a little different..... it was waist lenght waves, now its shoulder length curls.

Being vegan, I can tell you that it easy to get all your nutrients and be vegetarian! do your research and find a doctor that listens to you, meat is definatly not the only sourse of protien or iron.....and its definatly not the best source either. before your next blood test eat LOTS and I mean LOTS of dark green veggies! Cook up like two heads of broccoli, smother it in spinache and kale, shred some carrots on there, add a can of chick peas and some garlic and just attack it with a fork! And remember to take a multivitamin! You want to nip that anemia in the bud! you could even write down how much iron you are eating everyday to prove its not your diet so no one bugs you!

I wish you much luck, hit me up if you wanna talk veg stuff ever!

[yukinohana]

It gets better after high school :) Whenever I start feeling really stressed, I crochet or fold some origami roses, which really helps, so you might want to think about doing something like that! And something I discovered: if you act confident and beautiful, you will be!

[Elia]

I second going to a dietician as well. But don't worry, I promise, everything will pass. Your hair will get longer, you'll probably do fine in college as you already have a good GPA, and a dietary adjustment will most likely help :)