Help! My hair is in bad shape. Newbie needs advice.

[infinity_girl]

Argh, where to begin?

As you can see from my avatar I have very mousey, frizzy hair that is a mess! It has remnants of a chemical dye and I had been using an abrasive cheapo shampoo on it. I have just discovered this forum and decided I need to give my hair some lovin'. I seem to have damaged hairs that are different lengths growing (even from the top of my head) too.

I would like to grow it long but I see members of this forum with long, shiny, silky thick hair and I wonder if that is even possible with my hair.

I have started taking MSM about 2 months ago which I think has helped with new growth but I would like thicker, better quality hair. I am thinking of doing henna + indigo but would not know where to begin as I live in London.

Can anyone advise on a regime of how I can change my awful, crappy orangey-mousey hair into sleek, dark brown, shiny, thick hair? What would you all recommend?

[Madora]

Eat healthy and drink plenty of water. Exercise moderately.

Avoid hot curlers, straightening, chemicals, blow frying. Air dry only.

Use a wide tooth comb to detangle. How you detangle will make all the difference in your overall hair health.

Use hair friendly shampoos and conditioners.

Ditto for hair friendly elastics and pins.

Wear your hair up to protect the delicate ends. You also might want to look into a silk pillowcase.

Cut off at least half an inch and give yourself minute trims every 3 to 4 months.

Do S and D (Search and Destroy) on your hair every month.

Hair vitamin supplements

Scalp massage to stimulate the hair follicles

Brushing with a boar bristle brush - slowly - after detangling. Brushing not only removes dead hair cells and exercises the hair follicles, but also gives your hair softness and shine (over time)

The above are just general suggestions about overall hair health.

Lastly, you must have buckets of patience. Growing long hair is mainly a mixture of the genes you were born with, your overall hair care regime, and tons of patience.

You'll find further tips up in the Grey Menu Bar - see the Articles section - and click on the various entries.

Welcome! You'll find plenty of friendly folks here who are very knowledgeable about all aspects of hair care. Good luck!

[Kiwiwi]

Ohh your hair looks like mine when brushed out!
It doesn't look that bad at all to me!

Do you know that you're a curly? ^_^
I really recommend the curly girl method for you. I knew I had curls, I just didn't know how to take care of my hair. Now I do and gaahh I love having this knowledge!
Go get the book, or inform yourself online, altough the book was just nice for me (everything is in there) ^_^ I think you could be a 3b if your hair is really like mine ^_^

Welcome, by the way!! ^_^

[SpinDance]

Welcome to the forums! From your picture it looks like you've got a lot of wave/curl, so frizz is not uncommon. It can take time to figure out just what works with your hair, so be patient and kind to yourself and your hair. Take your time going through the Articles section and read the newbie advice articles. Unless your heart is set on a different color, jumping on the indigo/henna band wagon it may not be your best option. It doesn't come out, you have to grow it out. If you like your color, but the texture and condition are the issue, work on that. You can always play with the color later. Follow the 2 week rule, though. No split second decisions! :)

Many of us use sharp, hair scissors to cut off damage, hair by hair, which is called Search and Destroy, or S&D. I did this long before finding LHC, and was tickled to find it had a name! I just thought it was something weird I did while talking on the phone or riding in the car to keep my hands busy while chatting and at the same time remove any splits or broken hairs. Much cooler to be doing S&D.

Make sure that your tools aren't damaging your hair. Many curlies can't use a brush without damaging their hair. Brushes should never be used to detangle your hair. Use a good, seam-free, wide tooth comb to detangle. Do it slowly and gently, starting an inch or so from the bottom, and work up an inch or so at a time. Most easily available combs are injection molded, leaving them with sharp seams in between the teeth. These seams act like scissors curling ribbon for a package, only much worse. They will scrape the protective scales off your hair, resulting in permanent damage. There is a lot of info about this, and lots of suggestions about what sorts of combs work well. I tossed all my old, seamed combs and now use horn, wood and the Bakelite combs from Hair Sense.

Read up on curly/wavy techniques. Many who have waves do very well with conditioner only cleansing methods. Some do well with 'cones (silicones), some don't. Everyone is different and only careful experimentation with your hair will show you what works for you.

Look up Fox's Shea Butter Conditioning Cream (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?p=96208), SMT (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=128) (Snowymoon's Moisture Treatment) and Frizz Buster Gel (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=6508). All of those can help with the frizz.

I've had great luck with Panacea (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=50728)coconut oil, Shea butter and a few other oils. Using oils takes time to figure out what your hair likes. For example, not everyone's hair likes coconut, some do better with olive, or some other oil or combination. Less is best with these, though, so be careful. Portion control can be a challenge.

Take things slow, be patient. Learn how to put your hair up. Preventing damage from rubbing against things, getting caught under things, blowing in the wind, etc, means you don't have to deal with the weakened, damaged hairs later.

The good thing about growing long hair is that it takes a long time, so that gives you lots of time to read and do the slow experiments to figure out what works best for you!

[infinity_girl]

Thanks so much for your replies so far! Yes, I have very curly hair (it is actually curlier since I had my second child - my hair texture changed!).

Thanks for the advice on the combs SpinDance. I will definitely get rid of my moulded one. I do put coconut oil on my hair but it just ends up feeling greasy and doesn't seem to make it that much softer. I will try another oil too. Yes, I am very sick of my reddish hair. I have dyed it the same colour for years and I want to go darker and browner now. I don't want to use chemical dyes though. I don't mind if it is permanent. Thanks again and I am sure I will have more questions over time.

[spidermom]

Henna and indigo mixtures can give you a rich brown color.

Please do not brush your curly hair. It is not good for curls. Use a wide tooth comb only. I think you will get the prettiest result by combing conditioner through your hair in the shower, then rinse and let your hair dry naturally. Finger-combing a bit of leave-in product through your hair will help define your curls. You could use pure aloe vera gel with 1 or 2 drops of oil added.

Here is a simple change you can make right now with the products that you already have. Get a squirt bottle (I use an empty shampoo bottle) and shake your dollop of shampoo with a small amount of warm water. Apply conditioner to your ends first (ear level down), then squirt shampoo solution all over your scalp, finger-comb over your scalp to massage the solution through, then rinse. Condition again and rinse.

[Medievalmaniac]

Your hair doesn't look so bad, to judge from your avatar. But there are definitely a lot of things you can do to maximize what you have while growing out the processed bits. In addition to all of the advice you have already received, here is what I would do.

Firstly - as a curly girl, the frizzies are going to happen, but you can minimize them by not blowdrying or brushing your hair, as others have mentioned. I also recommend, since you are dealing with damage anyway, that you ditch your shampoo for a while. Curls need moisture. Do an apple cider vinegar (ACV) rinse, using about a tablespoon of ACV per quart of water or so, and follow that with conditioner; then try washing your hair once every other day or every third day using only conditioner (CO method).

When you get out of the shower/tub, wrap a towel around your hair and squeeze the excess water out. Don't rub your head. If you need it to dry slightly faster you can wrap the towel around your head like a turban and leave it there for a bit. Then while it's damp, use a wide-toothed comb to de-tangle. Scrunch, if you need to redefine your curls, and then leave your hair alone to dry. If it's frizzier than you want, use a few drops of oil, rubbed into your palms and smoothed over your hair, to tame those down a bit. Over time, as you build more of a moisture base into your routine, the curls will not frizz as much as they have been doing.

Welcome, and good luck!

[dulce]

Your hair looks curly in the pic,check out The curly girl handbook available at bookstores.Lots of great info!!

[StephanieB]

I second spidermom's CWC (Condition-Wash-Condition) suggestion:

Apply conditioner to your wet hair from ears down first.
Then shampoo yoru scalp area and roots only with dilute shampoo.
Rinse thoroughly.
Condition from roots down to ends with conditioner again.
Rinse thoroughly.
Give your hair a final rinse in cold water.

And if you have tangling problems, after the above steps, use a creme rinse and rinse it out thoroughly. Final rinse in cold water.

Use the Curly Girl method - 'plopping' - to dry your hair. (as described in her book or on her website)

[StephanieB]

Give your hair a final rinse in cold water.
The cold water closes the hair's cuticles that the warm water of your wash/shower opened.
open hair cuticle = frizz | closed hair cuticle = less or no frizz

[infinity_girl]

Thanks girls! Will definitely check out Curly Girl. Does anyone know a good place to buy henna + indigo in the UK? What are the Lush henna products like, can anyone recommend them?