View Full Version : Giving up goals

August 20th, 2011, 02:40 AM
Ok so I found this place with some waist length hair and grew it thicker and longer - hip...
I saw how things work here and got into it all and figured my goal would be TBL, beautiful length..
When i mentioned it to DBF he kinda encouraged me to go classic..
It's not the length I want but i did feel the urge to try, and see how it looks/feels :)

Well lately I've really felt i don't want it...
I did my regular 2/3 inch trim, and i wasn't sad at all about losing length/progress....even if it only shows in measuring tape...
i'm 95% sure i don't want classic...and even TBL is questionable...
My hair is slightly longer than hip length and i love it.

All of this makes me feel bad because i hate to give up, in general or disregard ' goals'..
I feel as if i failed, even tho it's what i want...
And it's so hard to stop measuring!!!!

I thought it's temporary and my wish for greater lengths would come back, but i've been feeling this way for more than 2 weeks...

I don't know why it feels so lame honestly..

August 20th, 2011, 03:16 AM
It's not a goal if you don't want to do it! If you're comfortable with your current length, stick with it. You're not far off, so should you decide later on that you'd like to keep growing you can. I see no failure here.

It's all about what you want to do with your hair. :}

August 20th, 2011, 04:47 AM
Hi sweetie! :)

I agree with Rusticular...and as you know, I've been maintaining at waist for almost 15 years now. It is my comfort length...anything longer or shorter didn't feel like "me" as much. Does that make sense? So...just make it a "follow your heart" path...and enjoy your hair. :)

kamikaze hair
August 20th, 2011, 05:27 AM
maybe you should change your goal to having healthy, beautiful, comfortable hair that makes YOU happy. OH SH*T!!! your already there!! :D YAY!!!

don't worry about "giving up" your goals, because if you love your hair the way it is now and can genuinely envision keeping it at that length forever then go for it.

August 20th, 2011, 05:32 AM
I think that's fine! I can't see myself ever wanting hair past hip, as it doesn't seem practical to me...and while hair can be pretty at tbl to classic and beyond, it would be hard to wear loose and I like to wear my hair loose! Heck, I may get to a stage where I just want to keep my hair at waist (my original goal before coming to LHC was waist, but somehow that became hip very quickly :p).

Of course, I've had to cut back to BSLish...so I'm further away from waist than I was at the start of the year, so it will be some time before I see waist OR hip!

But yeah, even I can't say how I'll feel when I get there. In the past I've always got tired of long hair and chopped it off!!! :bigeyes: and I know I don't want to do THAT again, but once I reach my goal, I may well get bored and want to try something different. That's just the way things go!

August 20th, 2011, 05:36 AM
After being here for 4 years, I've realized that I like my hair best the way I wore it for years before finding LHC - midback, with light angling on the sides. I've grown to TB twice since I've been here, but it didn't really feel like me.

Your hair goal is whatever you want it to be!

August 20th, 2011, 06:22 AM
Your goal is whatever you want it to be, and it's your decision if you want to change the goal posts! Your hair still looks gorgeous :)

Peggy E.
August 20th, 2011, 07:18 AM
All through life your goals have been born, reached, lost, altered - even forgotten. A "goal" is simply a mystical possibility, not something written in stone - just a word representing an idea that is extremely flexible.

I've never set a hair goal. I came to LHC because of the great hair toys and the wonderful advice on new styles in which to use them. Learning to take better care of my hair was a happy side-bar!

People set goals to try to keep themselves on track in pursuit of something they hope to attain. You've already got the hair YOU want - congratulations! Enjoy it, care for it, have fun with it and don't worry about having a hair "goal."

You don't need one!

August 20th, 2011, 07:45 AM
You already reached your goal IMO. You are at the length YOU want and your hair is healthy!!! Perfect!!!!

August 20th, 2011, 07:50 AM
It's definitely OK to change your mind on your hair journey. You learned new things about your hair at hip that you did not know at waist. It's all about the discovery. Now you get to maintain! Congratulations.

August 20th, 2011, 08:51 AM
Your DBF would probably prefer you to be happy with and confident about your hair than for it to be any particular length. ;)

August 20th, 2011, 09:17 AM
The goal should be to feel good about yourself and nothing else! And to have healthy, fabulous hair regardless of length. How often do we see women with hair to their butt but split ends from the mid-back down. They should re-evaluate their goal as you have. For me, I believe my hair should hit above the curve of my waist, just brushing my low back. As I am a professional bellydancer I need length but to not have to pull my hair out the way for people to see my hip work from behind. I think this is the most flattering and alluring length on a woman, but that's just me!

August 20th, 2011, 09:29 AM
First, I agree with the other comments, but also: Goals change and that's ok. If you thought your goal was to have it longer and now your goal is just to love it and keep it healthy at your current length, you haven't given up your goal, you've just changed it. It doesn't mean you've failed, it means you've discovered something about yourself and your goals have altered to match what you like. It's not quitting and it's not failure, it's just change.