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kitschy
July 21st, 2011, 04:45 PM
Henrietta's thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=74924)here got me boiling mad! I've been stewing for a couple of hours remembering all the stylist since 1976 that have told me my hair is dry and damaged.

IT IS NOT DAMAGED - IT IS CURLY!!!

There. I said it and got it off my chest once and for all!

For years I've tried to get my hair to submit to some sense of sleek, shininess....you know, the type of hair that shakes and flips and glistens. I've blown it, ironed it, curled it. I've slept with nylon stockings on my head, in satin caps with satin pillowcases. I've spent thousands of dollars on creams, lotions and potions. I've wasted countless hours stressing about rain, or exercise, or my lover touching my hair in a moment of passion.

I'm tired of people telling me how damaged my hair is when they have absolutely no understanding of my texture or my curls.

Here is a picture of what my hair looks like when I've had it in a damp bun, just after I got a trim - frankly, it looks dry and damaged

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=6031&pictureid=97870

but here it is in all it's freaky-deaky, curliness. It isn't damaged at all!

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=6031&pictureid=84210

....The End (of rant)

ratgirldjh
July 21st, 2011, 04:47 PM
Beautiful hair!

growingpains
July 21st, 2011, 04:49 PM
stunning curls!

prettykitty
July 21st, 2011, 04:51 PM
I hate that stylists feel the need to 'have a go' at people's hair. All hair is different! I am constantly told by them that my hair is too thin to be long, and I have cut it sooo many times as a result...no more! I just don't go anymore, take that, nasty money makers :P

theodora
July 21st, 2011, 04:55 PM
I think your hair is gorgeous and badass in its natural state. I hate how hairdressers are obsessed with straight hair. Every time I go to a salon, they always want to straighten my hair. And my hair is already pretty straight! I always tell them I want it blow-dried naturally, using just fingers. They say yes and then proceed to spend 30 minutes making it as flat and straight as possible. (while burning my scalp and hitting it repeatedly with a giant paddle brush)

Alvrodul
July 21st, 2011, 05:00 PM
Your hair is glorious! I have always coveted curls! :crush:

kyandii
July 21st, 2011, 05:03 PM
Your hair is amazing!

Hairdressers and stylists get me so mad when they say things like that! :rant:

Slinks
July 21st, 2011, 05:07 PM
lol - LOVED your rant !! :-) you have beautiful hair

Slinks
July 21st, 2011, 05:10 PM
want to add - here they are obsessed with straightening naturally curly hair but will give you a perm in a heartbeat !! D'oh !!!

silverjen
July 21st, 2011, 05:20 PM
How can anyone not love curls? Simply stunning, Kitschy, like a waterfall.

vanillabones
July 21st, 2011, 05:26 PM
I LOVE your curls, with long straight hair I plan to fake it with curls every day once I can! (with no heat or course!) Maybe most stylists aren't used to the hair texture. I personally do not know anyone with kinky curls so I wouldn't be able to tell if their hair was natural or damaged when straightened out.

kitschy
July 21st, 2011, 05:47 PM
Thanks all for your support. I guess I didn't realize how much it has hurt throughout my life to be told over and over and over again that my hair is damaged and needs to be cut off. This is the longest my hair has ever been because frankly I quit listening to people who wanted my hard earned dollars and didn't give a damn about my heart and soul.

The thing that sent me over the edge was the other grandmother (who happens to be a hairstylist) of my dear, darling, sweet little granddaughter said,

"I hope granddaughter doesn't end up with YOUR hair....it's just so dry and damaged and unmanageable!"

I wanted to reach across the table and slap her, but instead I just smiled like the good, little girl I had always been in submission to the hair "expert" who had control over my unruly head of curls.

Here's my granddaughter. I'm afraid she got my hair - and now she has another grandmother who will introduce her to the shame I had. At least I can be there for her.

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=6761&pictureid=108440

kellinaturalmom
July 21st, 2011, 05:50 PM
I still remember when I went to a salon in 1999 when the stylist told me "There's no use having long hair if it isn't pretty hair" and convinced me to cut it all off. What a b****! I remember it like it was yesterday...

Mairéad
July 21st, 2011, 05:54 PM
I LOVE your hair!

For years most hair stylists raved about my hair but then there was one a few years ago that really got into my head convincing me it was damaged beyond recognition and I ended up cutting it all off. It was a bit dry through the length but I think if I had held out, found this site, and developed my new routine WITH my hair, I'd in fact still have it. :o

RitaCeleste
July 21st, 2011, 05:59 PM
Well, I recently have come to the same conclusion about my own hair. It isn't really that damaged at all. I know if I use a brush, its gonna look fried to people. I like to oil and use a brush on it though. When I just finger comb it and let it dry naturally, no frizz, no looking "fried". I color. Because people were always telling me my hair was damaged and natural hair was wonderful, I grew natural to my waist. I wanted some layers and went in for a cut. The lady was feeling my hair and I told her it was virgin hair and she cringed. Literally cringed that that was my natural texture and hair. Of course she thought cutting inches off the length would help it. And it did until the next wash and my fresh ends looked just the same as the hair she had removed. I finally decided to color it and it made it softer. My hair is strong. I've had it trimmed layered thinned, chopped and hacked up. No more. People shouldn't assume my hair is fried or damaged just because I felt like brushing some oil in it or wearing it up. My hair is just my hair. It has texture. I can trim it up to my ears and they will still tell me I need to trim a lot of inches off. My sister says hairdresser are clueless, we have SUPER HAIR! She has the straighter texture but she was commenting on how long we can actually go without a trim and how splits don't travel up our hair unless we pull them apart. I get so annoyed because I feel my texture of hair isn't acceptable. I don't really want to put gel and products on it to make it look more acceptable when it really just makes me hate to run my fingers threw it. My hair doesn't really need that stuff, why should I be made to feel it does? All the time I see people trimming damage and talking about damaged ends and having hair that looks in great condition. My hair is never gonna look like that, I really have tried every length and a ton of styles. I am learning to like my hair again. And I'm not gonna bother with trims or S&D because it doesn't do much for my hair. Thank You so much for pointing out that some hair just has texture! Maybe if we educate people as to how healthy textured hair is supposed to look, they will know not to assume its damage!

julliams
July 21st, 2011, 06:02 PM
kitschy, I agree with every bit of what you said and Henrietta's thread has stayed with me this morning as I have pondered exactly the same issues you have raised in this post. I will never forget the day I went into a salon looking for a de-tangling product for my daughter's hair, when the stylist turned to me and said "what you should be getting is something for your own hair - it's very dry and damaged". I said "actually it's not, it's just wavy". But I knew she didn't believe me.

Then when I went into a store to find a BBB, and the salesgirl said "well for your hair that's dry and brittle..." Needless to say I left that store, went straight into another to be told "well for your hair that's so thin...." I stood aghast, turned to her and said "well, noone has EVER called my hair thin. I have about the thickest hair of anyone I know. This bun is all mine. I left that store as well and went home brushless.

My hair nowhere near the curls that yours does but in your first picture, I can totally relate to how your hair looks - that's my hair too. Your granddaughter is gorgeous and she is so lucky to have you to discuss hair with as she grows up. Who wouldn't want a family member to talk to who's on LHC!!!

pepperminttea
July 21st, 2011, 06:19 PM
I envy your granddaughter, kitschy. I'd love to have your beautiful curls.

embee
July 21st, 2011, 06:22 PM
Too absurd.

My hair is thin and straight and stringy. Every stylist has said I needed a perm, that I had to have short hair, that I needed bangs because my forehead is high.... And for years I listened.

No more. :)

I ran out of money for stylists so my hair grew and *I* am happy with it. So there.

And I'm glad you're happy with your hair too. :D

Your granddaughter is lovely, her hair is the princess hair of my childhood dreams.

RitaCeleste
July 21st, 2011, 06:27 PM
Honestly in the other thread, I looked at the hair pictures and didn't see anything that needed trimming at all. I was surprised at the number of people telling her she needed to loose an inch.

Kids are smart. I think your granddaughter will see that her other grandma just doesn't know much about curly hair.

Kosmos
July 21st, 2011, 06:30 PM
PREACH IT, SISTER! I am not a curlyhead myself but I am in a family of curly heads who have tried and tried to fight their textures because stylists and others have told them they had dry damaged hair. POP some moisture in that and let it dry naturally and GORGEOUS beautiful curls.

Your hair is /fabulous/!

Mesmerise
July 21st, 2011, 06:31 PM
kitschy, I agree with every bit of what you said and Henrietta's thread has stayed with me this morning as I have pondered exactly the same issues you have raised in this post. I will never forget the day I went into a salon looking for a de-tangling product for my daughter's hair, when the stylist turned to me and said "what you should be getting is something for your own hair - it's very dry and damaged". I said "actually it's not, it's just wavy". But I knew she didn't believe me.



I had a friend say to me the other day, "Is your hair dry?" I actually thought it was a weird question cause it obviously wasn't wet LOL. But then she looked at me as if I was a bit thick and said, "no, I mean dry...from damage!" I mean... I didn't even pick it because it's not "dry" at all. It's just kinda frizzy and boofy :p.

mrs carol
July 21st, 2011, 06:59 PM
You have nice hair. Pretty curls.

jojo
July 21st, 2011, 07:03 PM
loving your curly long locks, your grandaughters hair is adorable just like yours

elbow chic
July 21st, 2011, 07:03 PM
Beautiful, both you and your granddaughter. Too bad you didn't at least give Other Grandma a majorly dirty look. :laugh:

My grandma has very curly hair too and I think she's always been quite proud of it. Maybe that's why I've never been bothered by the flat-iron craze-- I've never even considered buying one. I think positive attitudes about one's natural attributes can definitely be passed down from generation to generation.

aliceinmadness
July 21st, 2011, 07:44 PM
I don't have many true curls...but without (and to a certain degree even after) considerable manipulation of my natural wavy texture, my hair can be incredibly floofy. Lenonine, even.

The thing is that when it's like that it's harder to see how glossy it is and that the ends are to the largest part whole rather than split or frayed. I think people mistake the difference in light reflection for a difference in actual health...and let's be honest, most people who do the traditional sort of styling put a TON of crap in their hair to make it LOOK shiny and have ridiculous amounts of slip. It's really not natural at all - and product advertising don't do anything to remedy the impression of what pretty hair "should" look like (*cough* photoshop)

Alas, especially stylists thing your hair ought to flop and slither like a wet noodle. I don't think people are intentionally mean for the most part...just brainwashed.

Messyhair
July 21st, 2011, 07:45 PM
Ugh, I've only had one really irksome experience at a salon. Actually, I wasn't even IN the salon, my waist-length hair and I were walking by when an employee basically flagged me down to say I NEEDED a trim because my hair was so dry and full of splits. I replied that I had very few splits because I checked daily and trimmed off any damage that I found, and then I moved on. I assume this was their strange way of drumming up business...?

Toiréasa
July 21st, 2011, 08:10 PM
Oh I love your curls they are beautiful. It's a shame they don't teach proper hair care in cosmetology school maybe then these hairdresser would start to push a more natural way of taking care of ones hair.

dulce
July 21st, 2011, 08:20 PM
A natural way of looking after hair doesn't make much money for the stylists.

Sunshineliz
July 21st, 2011, 08:22 PM
Absolutely beautiful hair kitschy as always! And I adore your granddaughter's hair!:crush: Other grandmother doesn't know what she's talking about! I hope she never makes your granddaughter feel terrible about her hair.

There must be some sort of weird brainwashing going on about texture. I think unless the curls were extremely obvious like in the second photo you showed, I was brought up to think that the textured hair was damaged. I did have damage in my hair before I cut it, but I thought that was why my hair seemed curlier and wavier too.:rolleyes: Pretty dang sure there is very little damage in my hair now, but it is still wavy and wurly.

BTW I did grow up with a little sister who has curls just like yours, kitschy, and I love her curls. (Especially "boinging" them when we were little:D) I don't know if she loved them or not, but I know she had some horrendous haircuts.:) But I don't recall my mother ever bemoaning it or calling it dry or damaged. That was MY hair she did that over (although it was certainly justified after she gave me a horrible perm!) Still, for some strange reason lil sis is straightening her hair all the time these days and I've been trying to encourage the wave! Go figure.

Blond On Blond
July 21st, 2011, 10:43 PM
kitschy your hair looks F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S!

dulce
July 21st, 2011, 10:50 PM
Kitschy,1 love your curls and hair colour!So feminine.

CaityBear
July 21st, 2011, 10:56 PM
I absolutely LOVE your curls! So absolutely beautiful!!

Henrietta's thread also got me pretty steaming. I'm sorry, that is soooo unprofessional and belittling to be laughing at her like that. Telling her that her hair is dry and damaged...I understand that...they wanna make money (still think they're sometimes stupid for it lol) but to laugh at her? That's sooo belittling.

Vani1902
July 21st, 2011, 11:11 PM
IT IS NOT DAMAGED - IT IS CURLY!!!


THANK YOU!!! People just don't understand what it is to have curly hair. I find it so irritating when I get asked "So why don't your straightening your hair?" It is as if it where a sin to have curly hair. People just don't understand that our hair isn't meant to fit into the image that the pictures on the screens show. It's rebellious. And quite frankly, I love that rebellion. :)
Your hair is wonderful. You are my hero. :)

owlathena
July 21st, 2011, 11:26 PM
Amazing curls!!!

Wavelin
July 22nd, 2011, 12:58 AM
You have beautiful curly hair, kitschy! I think that one of the most fun things about hair is that it is so different from person to person! All the colours, lengths and textures! LHC wouldn't be such a fun site to browse trough if every hair looked the same, like breed cats!

On, stylists, I think it is "fun" that the same people that are calling your waves frizz and says you have damaged ends, are happy to SLS-shampoo, rip-brush the wet hair, blow fry and then straighten it. All in one visit! :(

schweedie
July 22nd, 2011, 02:08 AM
You have such wonderful curly hair! Why would anyone want you to change it from its natural state?

I think I must be lucky with my hairdresser. I've gone to her for years, and while she doesn't shy away from telling me when my ends are damaged (which I trust her on since I have fine, breakage prone hair) she almost always comments on how well the rest of my hair is doing, saying I have "good hair" and never tries to convince me to do anything to it.

yvsa
July 22nd, 2011, 02:56 AM
You and your granddaughter are beautiful:crush:.

MissAlida
July 22nd, 2011, 03:06 AM
Your hair is beautiful, the curls are perfect.:) And guess why no one has the hair they show in shampoo commertials? Because that hair is not part of a human body, it is part of a program called Photoshop:mad:. I hate television.

annieangel149
July 22nd, 2011, 03:21 AM
hey kitschy
when i first joined here a while ago i came accross one of your posts and my jaw dropped when i saw a pic of your hair! i think your hair is amazing and the one you put up in this post with all your tumbling curls is stunning! i bet you get hot in the summer :D

Jezerellica
July 22nd, 2011, 03:29 AM
Your curls are incredible. I have been facinated by your hair type since I was a kid!

Muntchka
July 22nd, 2011, 03:30 AM
I'm so glad I found this thread! I thought that only happened to me.

Your curls are beautiful! I think hairdressers just forget that some types of hair are a bit more dry than others. We can't all have silky hair like the ones in commercials.

I only had one hairdresser that was delighted with my long hair. She was a friend of my mother and it was kind of funny to see them because my mother always told her to cut my hair short but she never did it because she loved my hair. This was the only hairdresser that never said something bad about my hair! The other ones liked to tell me my hair was too dry or was falling too much all the time.

One even convinced me that I was sick because my hair was falling too much. I even bought some shampoos and treatments for the falling. And the conclusion: this treatment made my hair awfully dry and it didn't decreased the falling hair BECAUSE IT WAS JUST NORMAL. If my hair was like she said I would be bald by now.
This is the reason I started cutting my hair at home.

I think most of the time we just can't hear what hairdressers say. If you think of it maybe they just want to persuade people to cut hair short or straighten it because this way you have to go to the saloon more often.

Viechen
July 22nd, 2011, 03:31 AM
First of all kitschy I looove your hair :D Then I want to joing in to the lament of bad hair dressers that feel the need to make everyone with natural hair that walks in their salon feel like crap! A month before I found LHC I had hair a little past BSL and went to get a teeny trim... I think we can all guess what happened... Yes, she bullied and guilted me into cutting off about 6ish (!!!) inches to a modified bob just above my shoulders... I HATED IT!! and when I found LHC a month later I spent many hours crying in my room, mourning over my beautiful hair and cursing myself for not having a backbone enough to tell her to shove her bleached, damaged hair and scissors where the sund dont shine...

*sigh* sorry for the rant... but this has been biting me for such a long time and when I mentioned it to my SO once he laughed and called me an idiot for mougning after some hair. But when I think of how long I could be if I hadnt succumbed to that pressure still makes me so sad...

knittingyogini
July 22nd, 2011, 05:46 AM
Your hair is glorious! I have always coveted curls! :crush:

This! My hair is every so slightly wavy, but the hairs also have a texture. (I don't think I figured out how to account for that in my hair type). Stylists always want to blow it dry then flat iron it as well as sell me a ton of products to make it straight and stay straight.

I'm new to LHC and just recently decided to grow it out. So, I've let them do this until recently when I got it cut. Otherwise, I can't be bothered to do all that work. Its amazing how much it changes the texture of my hair however briefly (and damaging).

But, really, if I had magic creme, I go the other way. I love the curlies.

Rebecca.1905
July 22nd, 2011, 05:58 AM
So jealous of those stunning curls!

I decided a while ago that not all stylists know what they're talking about. I used to be friends with a woman who has been working as a stylist for 20 years. She didn't even know that leaving conditioner on your hair is good for it until I mentioned it to her and of course now that's what she tells people to do. She sent me a "secret" invitation to a sale at her salon a month or so back with a personal note that she just "knew" I'd love a new style. I haven't talked to this woman in months, but she is FULLY aware that I've been growing my hair purposely. I am in LOVE with my waist length hair and I would not love a new style. So I just replied that I don't cut my hair, but thanx for the offer.

That other thread burned my buns too. I just don't get why some people get so snotty about other people's hair! Don't laugh, don't smirk, don't behave as if you know better - IT'S NOT YOUR HAIR!! Not to mention the one who told me I wouldn't like classic length hair because she didn't. Okay, sorry you didn't like it, but I'm not you, I want it, I can't wait to get there, and I MIGHT like it! So shut up!!!!

Touchy subject for me. I think I've handled it well in the moment, but it hangs out in my head and, well.... yeah.

mellie
July 22nd, 2011, 06:08 AM
I love your curls, Kitschy!! They are gorgeous!!! And no, your hair is not damaged or dry in any way, shape or form!!

MidnightStar
July 22nd, 2011, 06:44 AM
Gorgeous curls, kitschy! And my blood boiled when I read Henrietta's thread too. I too have been bullied by so-called hair "stylists" who think they know best, and that's why I refuse to go to them anymore. If I need a quick trim, I duck into a place like Fantastic Sam's, because they don't think they're "artists" and do exactly what I tell them to.
Recently I needed a trim and my bangs to be neatened up. Could've done it myself, but I was feeling lazy. Never again! The guy who cut it was a massive jerk, and kept telling me I needed 3+ inches off. In all fairness, he was probably right - there was some damage. But I was dealing with it, and it's MY hair. But he got his - while he was brushing (or "mangling") my hair after frying it to oblivion (after I said, you don't need to use the dryer, I don't use them at home) and he was lamenting how awful my hair looked (well, yeah, once you rip a brush through it, cut it uneven, and blowdry to within an inch of its life rather than letting my natural waves work, of course it looks like crap!), one of his colleagues was walking by. She stopped, watched him for a second, and then told me, "My God, you have beautiful hair!" I didn't stop laughing for about five minutes.
On the other end of the spectrum, I used to see this lovely hairdresser (the wife of a friend) who handled my hair well, gave me good advice, and always did exactly what I asked. I was sad when I moved *just* too far away to continue seeing her.

MonaMayfair
July 22nd, 2011, 06:54 AM
Oooh your curls are gorgeous, I'm envious!

GuardGirl
July 22nd, 2011, 06:56 AM
A-MEN!!!! Your hair is beautiful, and I too have shared many similar experiences!

Jing
July 22nd, 2011, 01:17 PM
People who are out to make money are terrible company. Maybe it has to do with the fact that most people who decide to become stylists seem to be into fashion, and a lot of them have the kind of interest in (or obsession with) fashion that makes people think anything that doesn't look like the latest paparazzi shot of whoever's-hot-right-now is just wrong.

JuliaDancer
July 22nd, 2011, 01:54 PM
I love the curls! When I see a woman who knows how to take care of her curls and they look like yours do, I wish my hair was curly! It's so wild and stunning! When I see natural curly women attempt to brush and straighten, it makes me sad... =(

RitaCeleste
July 22nd, 2011, 02:13 PM
Well, I get sad when I get told to put down the brush and put curl cream and gel in it, plop it and scrunch it. Its kinda sad that that is the look I am suppose to go for. Brushing oil threw my hair is very good for it. That makes it feel soft, tangle less, improves its actual condition. I don't see the other stuff as benefiting my hair beyond making it more socially acceptable. I'm just rather tired of the teeny tiny boxes I am suppose stuff myself and my hair into. People have the best of intentions but they can't really even see without some sort of bias. I'm going to wear my hair up more so it doesn't make people feel sad for me or something. That and I'm fast becoming an aspiring hair toy addict!

Crystal2010
July 22nd, 2011, 02:59 PM
My hairdresser finally does exactly what I tell her. Before I lurked and joined this site, I thought she knew best when she said my hair needed 'thinning out' and proceeded to razor cut it. And then she would iron it and put serum on and say how shiny it was. Then when I knew what was what, I revolted. Tiny trims I told her, no straightening, and sometimes she braids it. She understands that the layers she added to 'thin it out' are no longer what I want and so she micro trims them so now my hair is nearly all one length. Sometimes I (stupidly) call her bluff and say cut off the splits and damage. She looks and says, well there isn't any. We have an understanding, but it has taken time. My mum has thick 'unmanageable' hair, and so did her mother. So I have got used to the ignorance that they faced, and that people without poker straight hair continue to face. I still irks me that when my hair is in its unadulterated wavy state nobody ever comments, yet when it is very occasionally ironed it's a totally different story.

faithsdaisy421
July 22nd, 2011, 03:35 PM
Your hair is beautiful!

Quezie
July 22nd, 2011, 04:31 PM
I totally agree! The experience she wrote about made me mad.

Honestly, one of the things that keeps me from the salon is what they're going to say about the health of my hair, and the unconventional (to them) way that I care for it.
But really, like a lot of people said, they tell you your hair is dry and damaged to make money.

Kyla
July 22nd, 2011, 04:36 PM
Oh, wow! What amazing curls!!

Dina L.
July 22nd, 2011, 04:40 PM
kitschy, I wish I had your curls and thickness! Your hair is beautiful!
I'm a 2c/3a and if I comb my hair on day 1-3 after washing I have the same hair as yours on the first picture. So I just don't comb it. (Oh, and brushes? I guess I didn't have one for the last 20 years or more. I'm 27. :) )
The only hairdresser who can cut and style my hair properly is a (straight) man with 2b/2c, APL-SDL hair. :)

Keepitgrowing29
July 22nd, 2011, 04:57 PM
It is absolutely gorgeous! No where near damaged!

lapushka
July 23rd, 2011, 08:01 AM
Gorgeous curls, kitschy! Your granddaughter is lucky she inherited your curls! I just hope other grandma doesn't make your granddaughter hate her hair.

paintedhorse
August 22nd, 2011, 02:02 AM
uhg not listen to them your hair is absolutely gorgeous ! Embrace your natural hair!. i have sworn off hair salons, my husband took me to one after we got married to pamper me ( we had no idea about LHC or proper long hair care) and i told them to just trim 2 inches off well she said it was damaged and cut 5 inches off with out my permission! i was outraged and so was my husband he loves my long hair i wanted to stab her with her own scissors uhg so i havent been to one since!!!!

EbonyCurls
August 22nd, 2011, 02:21 AM
I don't see dry and I don't see damaged. I see wonderfully gorgeous, unique, and healthy resilient hair. Those stylists that think hair needs to be styled to death and straightened have been drinking the shampoo-flavored coolaid.

EbonyCurls
August 22nd, 2011, 02:27 AM
I think your hair is gorgeous and badass in its natural state. I hate how hairdressers are obsessed with straight hair. Every time I go to a salon, they always want to straighten my hair. And my hair is already pretty straight! I always tell them I want it blow-dried naturally, using just fingers. They say yes and then proceed to spend 30 minutes making it as flat and straight as possible. (while burning my scalp and hitting it repeatedly with a giant paddle brush)

Yes! Especially if you only went there for a trim and no style. It's like "I wasn't kidding about not wanting it styled." 99.99% of the time I've had my hair styled by someone (who I didn't approach myself because I like the way they do hair) they end up doing it inferior to how I would have done it.
And I also don't like how some stylists assume they are doing you a favor by offering to straighten it so you can "see how nice it can look", as if they think just because you came in curly that you don't know how to straighten your hair.

Rosetta
August 22nd, 2011, 02:28 AM
I am constantly told by them that my hair is too thin to be long, and I have cut it sooo many times as a result...no more! I just don't go anymore, take that, nasty money makers :P
The same here :p

The fact that someone can be *against* natural curls seems completely absurd to me, as all my childhood my mother was always pitying the fact that I did not have natural curls/waves (where one of my brothers did)... :( And thus she was always trying to curl my hair one way or another...

maria_asa
August 22nd, 2011, 03:01 AM
The same here :p

The fact that someone can be *against* natural curls seems completely absurd to me, as all my childhood my mother was always pitying the fact that I did not have natural curls/waves (where one of my brothers did)... :( And thus she was always trying to curl my hair one way or another...

Same for me too. My mother also pity my straight, thin, stringy hair and is always very careful to point out people with good hair (i.e. thick, curly hair).

It's been a few years now since I gave up going to hairdressers but when I went I was always told that my hair was sooo damaged when it in fact just is thin. I was also told that my hair would never grow longer than BSL and was then offered extensions to "fix" my hair.

CurlyMopTop
August 22nd, 2011, 03:33 AM
Amen! You and your grandaughter both have beautiful hair!! I've endured the same type of experiences with stylists. Although it's enough to make my blood boil, I try not to dwell on the past and am grateful for finding LHC. I'm looking forward to my hair future! Hopefully with long beautiful curls that look as good as yours. :)

Das Siechtum
August 22nd, 2011, 03:37 AM
Hmm, strange. I'm also a little bit on the curly side, but I never got these comments...

Mayflower
August 22nd, 2011, 05:39 AM
I hear ya! I have alot of texture to my hair and when I let it dry a certain way it can get very wild and wavy, which to most hairdressers means 'damaged' because it's not sleek and straight. I don't want my hair to be sleek and straight!
I really don't understand how they would think hair is damaged because it has some texture and shape to with, while there is (in my case at least) not a single split end or white dot in sight:cool:

Celtic Morla
August 22nd, 2011, 08:52 AM
My Mum has naturally curly hair-all my childhood i wanted it but I had straight hair. She would tell me how lucky I was. Looking at pics of her as a child I could see why she thought so. When she was young her mom took care of her ahir and it looked beautiful. When my Mum went to boarding school as a young teen she had never learned to take care of her ahir and it looked awful!! She would chop it off at shoulderlength and it stuck out all over the place!! Curly hair has a much different texture than straight and it tends to be dry so washing it as much as they think you should do so makes it worse. Sometimes the best people to use as stylists for curly hair are ethnic stylists! My mum had a guy in TX who was the best with her hair and could cut it to enhance the curls. She still misses him. She now prefers to trim her own hair and keeps it somewhat short and because she has learned to listen to it its very soft now.

I used to love to wrap my fingers up a curl when I was little and loved how her hair felt! The awful thing si she has given wavy/curly hair to 1 child in each generation and they have both been boys!! ARGH!!

redcelticcurls
August 22nd, 2011, 09:09 AM
If you don't want to slap Other Grandmother, I will. ;)

Some stylists just don't get any texture beyond straight.

I am quite grateful that there are plenty of curl friendly and curl knowledgeable stylists in my area. I never get crap at my salon.