Does anyone else feel manly with short hair??

[Mommyof4]

My short haired friends think I'm crazy. I'm a very feminine girl and I like to see all women will longer hair. I guess I'm stuck on the princesses I used to idolize when I was little. I feel very masculine and unattractive with my shoulder length hair. Does anyone else feel this way??

P.S. my husband wants my hair to be long, but not longer than mid waist. I don't understand how hair can be TOO long, if it is thick and healthy from root to tip. Does anyone else have a husband or significant other that feels that there is a "too long" length??


*I'm trying to get to 25 posts so I can be a full member.*

[Charlotte:)]

Oh yeah, short hair makes me look like a man! So does wearing all my hair up, so that it looks short.

[Mommyof4]

Oh yeah, short hair makes me look like a man! So does wearing all my hair up, so that it looks short.


Yeah, my hair doesn't look good up lol. I always put my short ringlets all around my face when it's in a ponytail or bun and then it just looks like I didn't put my hair up right lol.

[nazzooyzo]

i didn't feel manly but yes less feminine. but i think that is also because my clothes can be quite boyish. i do love short hair though and a lot of woman look beautiful and more suited with it

[Saranne772]

I would agree that I personally feel masculine with short hair. My faith teaches that women should have long hair. How long is long? Well that is down to personal convictions- I personally will let my hair grow as it wants. However so long has hair is long enough to be able to tell from behind if a person is male or female then it is long- from a faith aspect.

1 Corinthians 11:14-15 "Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering"

I know this is controvesial and I do not mean to cause offence to any member of LHC. This is what my faith is however it does not effect the way I treat anyone male or female :) (My faith, if it is not shared- is not something I expect others to agree with)

[chahuahuas]

Sometimes I can feel a little unfeminine with pixies hair (especially if it looks like S*** because it's beadheady or greasy).

But with chin length? I feel friggin' ADORABLE!
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8220&pictureid=107223http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8220&pictureid=107242

I do get curls though, and I feel like curls are very soft, feminine and young-looking. Maybe if you ladies with straight hair feel differently about chin length than I because of that.

[ArienEllariel]

For the most part, I feel unattractive and non-feminine with short hair. Kind of a gender-less "it". lol I don't know if that makes sense.

[ArienEllariel]

Sometimes I can feel a little unfeminine with pixies hair (especially if it looks like S*** cuz its beadheady or greasy).

But with chin length? I feel friggin' ADORABLE!
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8220&pictureid=107223http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8220&pictureid=107242

I do get curls though, and I feel like curls are very soft, feminine and young-looking. Maybe if you ladies with straight hair feel differently about chin length than I because of that.

I love your hair like that!!! So cute! I think curlies can pull off short hair a lot better. Your hair reminds me of my best friend growing up's hair. She pulls off chin length hair very well.

[Mommyof4]

For the most part, I feel unattractive and non-feminine with short hair. Kind of a gender-less "it". lol I don't know if that makes sense.

Yeah, I guess that's a better way to explain it! I always feels like "if my hair was just longer, I would feel fine with this outfit" or " if my hair was longer, I would feel so much more confident"

I never realized how much of a blessing my beautiful thick and wavy/curly waist length hair was until I cut it to give it to "locks of love" and had a melt down. Then came the hair dye, bad cuts, babies that my hair all but fell out after each of them, and damage from over protein treating it.... I wish hair grew 3 inches a night. Then, if we didn't want it, we could cut it every day. lol.. dream land

[chahuahuas]

I love your hair like that!!! So cute! I think curlies can pull off short hair a lot better. Your hair reminds me of my best friend growing up's hair. She pulls off chin length hair very well.

Thanks! I want to add that sometimes I feel very manly with long hair, especially if it isn't layered!!

(Sorry the picture is so big, and that it has words on it... usually I get rid of ugly pictures, but my ex had added words to it "icanhascheesburger.com" style and I thought it was funny :p)

http://a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/19444_295689796163_542041163_4710748_7387652_n.jpg

Oh and someone please tell me if the above picture doesn't show up for them.

[FluffSpider]

I would feel more 'manly' with a short 'do mainly because it's ingrained in me. Having long hair coincided with my starting to know about skin care, hair care and make-up. My short hair always looked BAD. Though I see alot of girls who pull off the short and very short look so well-and they might even look bad in longer 'dos. My health teacher has a very feminine face- delicate nose, high cheekbones, plump lips, amazing smile- and about one inch of hair. She pulls it off so beautifully I doubt she would look as good with long hair. It's not about the length itself, it's about facial structure, attitude and how you choose to wear it.

[October]

I've never had really really short hair but I know what you mean. I would feel really boyish with short hair. I want the long girly princess hair.

Also, yeah my DH thinks that longer than BSL would be too long but I don't see how it could be too long either. As long as it is healthy and looks good.

[greygardens]

No. I never feel "manly" and I never feel "feminine". I just feel like me. The length of my hair has never made any difference to that.

[battles]

I actually felt quite cute with my short hair (pixie or chin), and it was so easy to take care of. :p

At almost shoulder, I'm starting to feel like my hair is getting longer and I like this even more.

[MissManda]

I don't mind pixie cuts on me too much. The main problem I have with those is I'm too lazy to style them with products to make them look nice. :P I did feel somewhat androgynous, but it wasn't too much of a problem and there were times where it was fun. Ha ha. Now that my body shape is much more feminine, though, I don't think I'd want a pixie again because I don't think it would look right with my broad-shouldered hourglass shape.

I really dislike chin to shoulder lengths on myself, however. GACK! I've never really felt attracted to bob hairstyles and I do not think they suit my personality or body shape one bit. They don't make me feel masculine per se, but I do think I am very unattractive with them. I once had a bob with an undercut and it looked so awful. Never again...

If I HAD to go short for some reason, I'd probably get a pixie or maybe a shag because I've never had one of those before. If I was feeling particularly daring, I'd shave my head. :D

[Mommyof4]

I would agree that I personally feel masculine with short hair. My faith teaches that women should have long hair. How long is long? Well that is down to personal convictions- I personally will let my hair grow as it wants. However so long has hair is long enough to be able to tell from behind if a person is male or female then it is long- from a faith aspect.

1 Corinthians 11:14-15 "Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering"

I know this is controvesial and I do not mean to cause offence to any member of LHC. This is what my faith is however it does not effect the way I treat anyone male or female :) (My faith, if it is not shared- is not something I expect others to agree with)

I am also a Christian :) I don't judge or anything, everyone has a God-given choice in what they believe and do. However, for my personal beliefs, I feel long hair is beautiful on a woman and given for a covering, much like a a beautiful dress or scarf. But, I also have had short cuts that I felt were pretty, but I only liked them for a few days lol before wishing my hair was long and beautiful again.

I do not want to cause any arguing. Just sharing what I believe :)

[Kleis]

No. I never feel "manly" and I never feel "feminine". I just feel like me. The length of my hair has never made any difference to that.

Seconding this. The hair doesn't make someone feminine, masculine, or somewhere in between, or even somewhere embracing both. The *person* does. My sense of self remains consistent no matter my hair length, really. (And it's been many years, but I had a super-short pixie once.)

[Mommyof4]

I've never had really really short hair but I know what you mean. I would feel really boyish with short hair. I want the long girly princess hair.

Also, yeah my DH thinks that longer than BSL would be too long but I don't see how it could be too long either. As long as it is healthy and looks good.

yeah, I want hair like Cate Blanchett in "Elizabeth" or Isolde in the movie "Tristan and Isolde". I'm of Scottish/English/Irish descent, so I guess those are the stories that as an adult bring me back to wanting to be a long haired cinderella or jasmine lol :) Yeah, my hubby said "just like to the middle of your back, not longer than your elbows, cuz then it looks like youre 2 feet tall." I was like, what?! So i got him to agree that totally healthy hair would be beautiful to my waist, but he prefers it shorter. I don't consider hair truly "long" like i want it until at least waist length.. I'd wear it to my feet it it'd grow that long lol.
This is embarrassing, but what does "dh" stand for? I see it on everything, but I have no clue lol.

[Cania]

I hate having short hair, it makes me feel really unattractive, but I like it on most other people.

And like you, OP, my boyfriend thinks there is such a thing as "too long", and I agree with him. I think really, really long hair can look amazing on other people, but it wouldn't suit me.

[Mommyof4]

I don't mind pixie cuts on me too much. The main problem I have with those is I'm too lazy to style them with products to make them look nice. :P I did feel somewhat androgynous, but it wasn't too much of a problem and there were times where it was fun. Ha ha. Now that my body shape is much more feminine, though, I don't think I'd want a pixie again because I don't think it would look right with my broad-shouldered hourglass shape.

I really dislike chin to shoulder lengths on myself, however. GACK! I've never really felt attracted to bob hairstyles and I do not think they suit my personality or body shape one bit. They don't make me feel masculine per se, but I do think I am very unattractive with them. I once had a bob with an undercut and it looked so awful. Never again...

If I HAD to go short for some reason, I'd probably get a pixie or maybe a shag because I've never had one of those before. If I was feeling particularly daring, I'd shave my head. :D

The cut that through my last 2 pregnancies I have been growing out is the one that is shorter up the back and goes longer towards the chin. Because of my thyroid and hormones, it literally took me TWO years just to get my hair one length :( Everyone told me how cute I was with it, but I couldn't even fake like, yeah thanks I like it too lol. I also don't feel like it suits my personality. I'm different and not one who likes to follow trends, except LHC haha. I've always thought about how cool pixie would be, especially after seeing the girl from Harry Potter and how it softens her face and she looks radiant. BUT... I'd never do it :) I like to twirl my hair and I can't wait until I have to move it to sit down. I will literally have tears of joy when my hair finally gets that long again :D

[invisiblebabe]

The shortest I have had my hair (not counting when I was a baby/toddler) has been APL. I do not feel masculine with APL hair. :)

The longest I have had my hair was maybe an inch past classic length. I don't think I felt any more feminine with classic length hair than I did with APL, although one outside factor is skin: when I had classic length hair I battled acne, and when I had APL hair, I did not.

[Bonkers57]

You LOOK friggin' adorable in those pics! :D

I could (and did) pull off a pixie cut when I was younger. But now...wouldn't look so good. But masculine? Not really.


Sometimes I can feel a little unfeminine with pixies hair (especially if it looks like S*** because it's beadheady or greasy).

But with chin length? I feel friggin' ADORABLE!
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8220&pictureid=107223http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8220&pictureid=107242

I do get curls though, and I feel like curls are very soft, feminine and young-looking. Maybe if you ladies with straight hair feel differently about chin length than I because of that.

[Mommyof4]

I hate having short hair, it makes me feel really unattractive, but I like it on most other people.

And like you, OP, my boyfriend thinks there is such a thing as "too long", and I agree with him. I think really, really long hair can look amazing on other people, but it wouldn't suit me.

I think Jennifer Aniston looks AMAZING with short hair. She's the reason I cut it into the bob with the stacked back. I saw an episode of friends where she had a similiar cut. I think she just looks pretty with anything, though. If my hair was really long, like feet length, I admit I would braid it and let it dry to make consistent waves or put it into complicated updo's or half do's to keep it from look bland, but when I think of how long it takes just to get 6 inches of hair.. I'm like man, what an investment. Hair is so priceless! Thanks to everyone for replying! I'm trying to get my 25 posts so I can have a profile and stuff. I want to be a full member!:D

[AlexiaBlue]

Yes, I absolutely feel like a guy with short hair! I LOVE long hair and prefer to see all women with long, beautiful flowing locks, but that's just my personal opinion! :)

[MissManda]

The cut that through my last 2 pregnancies I have been growing out is the one that is shorter up the back and goes longer towards the chin. Because of my thyroid and hormones, it literally took me TWO years just to get my hair one length :( Everyone told me how cute I was with it, but I couldn't even fake like, yeah thanks I like it too lol. I also don't feel like it suits my personality. I'm different and not one who likes to follow trends, except LHC haha. I've always thought about how cool pixie would be, especially after seeing the girl from Harry Potter and how it softens her face and she looks radiant. BUT... I'd never do it :) I like to twirl my hair and I can't wait until I have to move it to sit down. I will literally have tears of joy when my hair finally gets that long again :D

Oh yes, those kinds of styles are a nightmare to grow out. I liked my bob style for only a short amount of time before I started to hate it and wanted long hair again.

I like Emma Watson with both short and long styles, although I just like it when people do their own thing. :) I see so many women who pull off pixies and bobs so well, so I'll just leave the short styles to them.

I've been seeing a lot of asymmetric and wavy bobs around lately and I really like those styles, but I'd never try them because I'm content with my long hair and as I said before, I'm super-lazy with using styling tools and products.

I have a nervous habit of playing with my hair. I don't twril it, bit I do like to feel the texture. :o I'm with you on waiting for the day when I can sit on my hair! I had a dream about my hair being that long a couple of times and I can't wait for it to come true.

[jujube]

Seconding this. The hair doesn't make someone feminine, masculine, or somewhere in between, or even somewhere embracing both. The *person* does. My sense of self remains consistent no matter my hair length, really. (And it's been many years, but I had a super-short pixie once.)

I can only agree with this. I don't believe short hair on women is anymore "manly" than long hair on a man is "womanly." In fact I find it kind of sad that these stereotypes are perpetuated... What makes a person look feminine, or masculine, is so much more than their hair. Stance, gestures, posture, build, muscle mass, facial structure, features, body figure, etc.

But then again there's a difference between looking and feeling, and I do understand feeling as if your hair is ugly (growing out a pixie anyone?), and I can understand that some feel "manly" with short hair. Though all of this has more to do with personal insecurities than hair length itself.

ETA: As for blanket statements like "short hair is unfeminine/manly" or about "liking all women to have long hair," well, maybe I'm being too sensitive, but they make me feel kind of unwelcome.

[HairFaerie]

Nope, I never felt manly. I must say that I have had pixies many times in my life and I always felt very feminine and sexy with them.

The only haircut that made me feel masculine was a mohawk. (A real one, not one of those pretend ones, mind you.) But, I didn't mind and I rocked it! It was BADASS! :)

And jujube, I agree with what you said 100%. There's so much more to it than just hair!

[Mommyof4]

Thanks! I want to add that sometimes I feel very manly with long hair, especially if it isn't layered!!

(Sorry the picture is so big, and that it has words on it... usually I get rid of ugly pictures, but my ex had added words to it "icanhascheesburger.com" style and I thought it was funny :p)

http://a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/19444_295689796163_542041163_4710748_7387652_n.jpg

Oh and someone please tell me if the above picture doesn't show up for them.

It showed up for me!!

[Mommyof4]

I can only agree with this. I don't believe short hair on women is anymore "manly" than long hair on a man is "womanly." In fact I find it kind of sad that these stereotypes are perpetuated... What makes a person look feminine, or masculine, is so much more than their hair. Stance, gestures, posture, build, muscle mass, facial structure, features, body figure, etc.

But then again there's a difference between looking and feeling, and I do understand feeling as if your hair is ugly (growing out a pixie anyone?), and I can understand that some feel "manly" with short hair. Though all of this has more to do with personal insecurities than hair length itself.

ETA: As for blanket statements like "short hair is unfeminine/manly" or about "liking all women to have long hair," well, maybe I'm being too sensitive, but they make me feel kind of unwelcome.


Of course there are other things that matter in this area! I didn't mean that all women need long hair, I meant that I've never seen a woman with long hair and NOT liked/envied it! Please, read my other posts, and you'll see that I am not a radical person against short haired people or long haired people! I don't want anyone to think that! I kind of wish I hadn't posted at all now :( I know plenty of guys with long hair and to me, it looks cool, like a warrior or something hehe:)

Sorry for anyone who took offense, it's hard online, because you don't hear my voice and the way I'm saying things.:confused:

btw, your pic is SO PRETTY and I was just speaking from my feelings for myself.

[Bene]

With all the crap I had to do to my hair when it was short just to make it look somewhat presentable, I felt pretty f**king far from manly :laugh:


Then again, my hair length/style has very little to do with my gender identity. Personally, I have trouble fully understanding the whole "My hair represents blah blah blah to me" sentiment.

[battles]

I can only agree with this. I don't believe short hair on women is anymore "manly" than long hair on a man is "womanly." In fact I find it kind of sad that these stereotypes are perpetuated... What makes a person look feminine, or masculine, is so much more than their hair. Stance, gestures, posture, build, muscle mass, facial structure, features, body figure, etc.

But then again there's a difference between looking and feeling, and I do understand feeling as if your hair is ugly (growing out a pixie anyone?), and I can understand that some feel "manly" with short hair. Though all of this has more to do with personal insecurities than hair length itself.

ETA: As for blanket statements like "short hair is unfeminine/manly" or about "liking all women to have long hair," well, maybe I'm being too sensitive, but they make me feel kind of unwelcome.

Agreed with this.

[Mommyof4]

Oh yes, those kinds of styles are a nightmare to grow out. I liked my bob style for only a short amount of time before I started to hate it and wanted long hair again.

I like Emma Watson with both short and long styles, although I just like it when people do their own thing. :) I see so many women who pull off pixies and bobs so well, so I'll just leave the short styles to them.

I've been seeing a lot of asymmetric and wavy bobs around lately and I really like those styles, but I'd never try them because I'm content with my long hair and as I said before, I'm super-lazy with using styling tools and products.

I have a nervous habit of playing with my hair. I don't twril it, bit I do like to feel the texture. :o I'm with you on waiting for the day when I can sit on my hair! I had a dream about my hair being that long a couple of times and I can't wait for it to come true.

From the most recent posts, I just want to clarify that I was just speaking for my own personal preference! I also agree that people are AWESOME when they do their own thing! That's what makes them THEM. I have a friend at church that has a pixie cut and it looks SO good on her! She has snow white skin and black hair and my little girl is always commenting on how she looks like snow white.

I think the biggest reason that I feel ugly (changing it from manly because of the sensitivity) with short hair is definitely because of the styling it takes to look good. I HATE styling my hair knowing that I'm damaging it permanently, so I then try to style it without heat.. when it's short, with my hair type, it looks like a MESS.

Sorry that this post didn't stay light hearted like I intended :o

[Bene]

Sorry that this post didn't stay light hearted like I intended :o


Ok, so from my end it looks like you're equating women who aren't stereotypically feminine/girly with manly and/or ugly.

If this had come up when I was 12 years old, I probably would've been all up in here like "Who do you think you are trying to tell me that I'm not feminine because of your limited standards and blah blah blah"

I've grown up since then, and I find that masculinity and femininity are relative. I find that as I become more comfortable with myself, and in not caring how other people see me, I'm okay that my own version of femininity can be seen as masculine by somebody else.


So, if you feel manly with short hair, that's cool, but what's so bad about feeling manly?

[Mommyof4]

Also, as a girly girl, I don't want to feel manly, so I'm not sure how it's offensive.:confused:

**If anyone knows how to delete a post, please let me know.**

I'm knew to LHC and I didn't realize this post would turn into a thread of belief issues. I was totally lighthearted when I posted and I didn't realized it would go from funny/joking to intense and confrontational, just like i hate my toenails painted red because i feel like they look really short. Just an opinion. I'm also not an insecure person just because I have preferences about my hair. Everyone that wants long hair that is here obviously LIKES long hair, right?

I joined LHC because I thought it would be a safe place to talk about LONG HAIR from the posts I always read on here..

Now that I reached my 25 posts and I'm a "real" member.. I don't think I'll be posting anymore. We're all adults and I just want to grow my hair out.:(

Also, because people haven't read my other posts and are forming their own sterotypical opinion about me from this one post. I have friends that are guys that have LONG hair and I think it looks great, especially because they don't have damage from dying and straightening, so their hair is thick at the ends and amazing. I have friends that are girls that have inch long hair and they look great, too. Some of them, I've never seen with long hair, and I can't picture them looking better than they look now.

[beccababesx]

I've never had really short hair, but I've had just past shoulder length. I didn't feel manly as such but I felt incredibly plain and unfeminine.

[Mommyof4]

Ok, all this work to get my full membership.. and now i'm deleting it...

SO sad

If you don't agree with the fact that I'm a woman and I like to feel "girly" than you don't have to post.

You want me to be okay with your own beliefs while you sneer at mine? That IS like a 12 year old.

Bye, LHC. Thanks to all the friendly posters.

Sorry to the people who are looking for "discussions" that are just too involved for my taste.

[oktobergoud]

Seconding this. The hair doesn't make someone feminine, masculine, or somewhere in between, or even somewhere embracing both. The *person* does. My sense of self remains consistent no matter my hair length, really. (And it's been many years, but I had a super-short pixie once.)

This exactly! :)

When I had a short pixie for the first time, I have to admit I felt a bit less feminine.. but after that I had all kinds of short haircuts that basically made me feel awesome and badass haha :P

To each their own, I guess! I like pixies very much and might go back to them in the future, but for now I'm growing it out.. just for a change!

And I see there's some discussion going on... will have to read fasterrrr.

[chahuahuas]

I didn't mean that all women need long hair, I meant that I've never seen a woman with long hair and NOT liked/envied it!

I've seen plenty of women with long hair that I haven't liked/envied. It can be damaged. If they wear it down the same way every single day (or up the same way every single day) and never mix it up, I usually won't like it, because it's just boring to me. I appreciate that LHCers spend alot of time trying out different hair styles, so their extreme lengths don't get static (to me, static is ho-hum!)



I think the biggest reason that I feel ugly (changing it from manly because of the sensitivity)

Changing it from "manly" to "ugly" is worse, IMO. If you thought what you were saying was insulting to women before by calling them 'manly', why would you change it to 'ugly'...


ETA:


I've grown up since then, and I find that masculinity and femininity are relative. I find that as I become more comfortable with myself, and in not caring how other people see me, I'm okay that my own version of femininity can be seen as masculine by somebody else.


So, if you feel manly with short hair, that's cool, but what's so bad about feeling manly?

I agree, I don't mind if she feels manly with short hair, that's her prerogative. I don't dictate how she feels about her own self. :)

[Mommyof4]

I've seen plenty of women with long hair that I haven't liked/envied. It can be damaged. If they wear it down the same way every single day (or up the same way every single day) and never mix it up, I usually won't like it, because it's just boring to me. I appreciate that LHCers spend alot of time trying out different hair styles, so their extreme lengths don't get static (to me, static is ho-hum!)



Changing it from "manly" to "ugly" is worse, IMO. If you thought what you were saying was insulting to women before by calling them 'manly', why would you change it to 'ugly'...


ETA:


I agree, I don't mind if she feels manly with short hair, that's her prerogative. I don't dictate how she feels about her own self. :)


Again, I don't care how anyone else wants to be.. I just meant I MYSELF don't like to feel that way.. I didn't deem myself a representative of every woman, just MYSELF.

[Eboshi]

I've never been a man, don't know how it feels to be a man, so I'm not sure how I can feel "manly" with short hair.

I suppose my answer to this question is "Huh?" :confused:

[BabyRay33]

This makes me kind of sad. I think the OP was just trying to discuss how she felt with us. I don't think she was trying to be offensive to anyone.

We all have different reasons for being here and growing our hair....

[Bene]

If a man showed up and said, I feel girly with long hair, and then went on to say "When I say 'girly', I really mean ugly" I'd respond the same way. What's so bad about feeling girly?

I think this is a pretty good opportunity to bounce ideas about how appearances affect one's views on their own gender. I'm curious because *I* don't see how it's relevant but it's interesting to hear what other people say about it.

[jujube]

Ok, all this work to get my full membership.. and now i'm deleting it...

SO sad

If you don't agree with the fact that I'm a woman and I like to feel "girly" than you don't have to post.

You want me to be okay with your own beliefs while you sneer at mine? That IS like a 12 year old.

Bye, LHC. Thanks to all the friendly posters.

Sorry to the people who are looking for "discussions" that are just too involved for my taste.

LHC is an open-minded community where being judgemental is not accepted. Feel free to leave if you're not ready to respect the forum guidelines. You did say in your original post that you liked "all women" to have long hair; you can't say that you'd like "all women to have huge breasts" or "all people to be white" and expect such a thread to stay light-hearted.

Claiming that short hair on women is "manly" is the exact counterpart to saying that long hair on men is "womanly." We have male members with long hair and we're trying to fight that stereotype, so why try to reinforce the opposite stereotype? Many female members here have had or currently have short hair, some like it, some don't. Some feel beautiful, some feel ugly.

You like long hair, so do I. I just don't think it's fair to label women who prefer their hair short as "manly" or "ugly." I'm also a woman, and I enjoy feeling feminine as well, but I felt very feminine with a buzzcut and no makeup. As I said, it's about your own insecurities, not your actual hair.

ETA: I get that you spoke more about "feeling" feminine, but then again I can manage "feeling" feminine without any hair on my head. It's sad that one should comply to the "traditionally feminine" beauty standard in order to "feel" feminine. I feel feminine because I'm a woman, not because I have a 24-inch waist.

[Mommyof4]

This makes me kind of sad. I think the OP was just trying to discuss how she felt with us. I don't think she was trying to be offensive to anyone.

We all have different reasons for being here and growing our hair....


Thank you. And yes, it was just a feeling that I shared. People are dissecting every word in my replies and I feel like I'm a Presidential Candidate, but in an unspecial way. I would equate posting in the LHC to being thrown into a wolves den. I just want to delete my posts and membership, but I am not a full member yet, so I can't even do that. I just want to stop getting replies from people who are disgusted by me because I don't share the same views/opinions/feelings as them. I was humble about my post, but if they are reading so closely, they must not want to see that I wasn't trying to argue or belittle anyone, and that just makes me sad and mad.:rolleyes:

[Mommyof4]

LHC is an open-minded community where being judgemental is not accepted. Feel free to leave if you're not ready to respect the forum guidelines. You did say in your original post that you liked "all women" to have long hair; you can't say that you'd like "all women to have huge breasts" or "all people to be white" and expect such a thread to stay light-hearted.

Claiming that short hair on women is "manly" is the exact counterpart to saying that long hair on men is "womanly." We have male members with long hair and we're trying to fight that stereotype, so why try to reinforce the opposite stereotype? Many female members here have had or currently have short hair, some like it, some don't. Some feel beautiful, some feel ugly.

You like long hair, so do I. I just don't think it's fair to label women who prefer their hair short as "manly" or "ugly." I'm also a woman, and I enjoy feeling feminine as well, but I felt very feminine with a buzzcut and no makeup. As I said, it's about your own insecurities, not your actual hair.

Ok, I have FINALLY found where the problem in my post was. I was saying that EVERY woman with long hair that I have ever seen I liked their LONG HAIR. That was it..:confused:

[Eboshi]

I've read this thread through and that part in which "manly" was then changed to "ugly" made me cringe. I don't see where anybody is attacking you though, Mommyof4.

TLHC is a big forum. Why not look around and see what else it has to offer? If this thread makes you uncomfortable though you don't have to keep responding to it. :shrug:

[Mommyof4]

LHC is an open-minded community where being judgemental is not accepted. Feel free to leave if you're not ready to respect the forum guidelines. You did say in your original post that you liked "all women" to have long hair; you can't say that you'd like "all women to have huge breasts" or "all people to be white" and expect such a thread to stay light-hearted.

Claiming that short hair on women is "manly" is the exact counterpart to saying that long hair on men is "womanly." We have male members with long hair and we're trying to fight that stereotype, so why try to reinforce the opposite stereotype? Many female members here have had or currently have short hair, some like it, some don't. Some feel beautiful, some feel ugly.

You like long hair, so do I. I just don't think it's fair to label women who prefer their hair short as "manly" or "ugly." I'm also a woman, and I enjoy feeling feminine as well, but I felt very feminine with a buzzcut and no makeup. As I said, it's about your own insecurities, not your actual hair.

ETA: I get that you spoke more about "feeling" feminine, but then again I can manage "feeling" feminine without any hair on my head. It's sad that one should comply to the "traditionally feminine" beauty standard in order to "feel" feminine. I feel feminine because I'm a woman, not because I have a 24-inch waist.

I didn't ask does everyone think that short hair on a woman is manly. I asked did anyone else FEEL manly, implying, that even though I know it's not a big deal, my face looks so unfeminine and pretty, to me, MY face, not EVERY woman's face, when my hair is short. What an unwelcoming place. I didn't violate any guidelines. I LOVE that you're entitled to your opinions and views, but you feel I'm not entitled to mine. And you are certainly not respectful of my feelings as an individual, just because my post didn't say what you thought it should. What's worse, is that my post was taken out of context.

[PinkyCat]

I think the OP means she feels less feminine with short hair - which I can completely relate to. When I was little, my mom didn't know how to work with my curls, so she kept them short. I could never play the butterfly princess or queen with my little friends cause I looked like a little boy. This has made me utterly rebel in adulthood and grow my hair for a mile.

I totally understand. :thumbsup:

[Bene]

I didn't ask does everyone think that short hair on a woman is manly. I asked did anyone else FEEL manly, implying, that even though I know it's not a big deal, my face looks so unfeminine and pretty, to me, MY face, not EVERY woman's face, when my hair is short. What an unwelcoming place. I didn't violate any guidelines. I LOVE that you're entitled to your opinions and views, but you feel I'm not entitled to mine. And you are certainly not respectful of my feelings as an individual, just because my post didn't say what you thought it should. What's worse, is that my post was taken out of context.


I don't think anyone is saying that you're not entitled to YOUR opinion, just choosing to voice their own which happens to not coincide with yours.

Some may have been offended by what you wrote, which happens. Others (like myself) are just curious about what you're saying and are just throwing things out there to see what you mean.

I don't agree with what you've written. But not agreeing doesn't mean attacking, it just means not agreeing :shrug:

[TheMechaGinger]

My DBF does't want my hair any longer than waist length either but I'm sure he'll love it once it gets past that. If not I'll love it enough for both of us :D

[Mommyof4]

I've read this thread through and that part in which "manly" was then changed to "ugly" made me cringe. I don't see where anybody is attacking you though, Mommyof4.

TLHC is a big forum. Why not look around and see what else it has to offer? If this thread makes you uncomfortable though you don't have to keep responding to it. :shrug:


Obviously, I don't think manly means ugly! I'm married to and in love with a man, my husband! Hello? I meant that I want a feminine, pretty face like a queen or princess, and when my hair is short, my face is ugly and I feel like, huh, I look like a dude, not a pretty girl. I'm replying because I feel like everyone is taking everything I said way out of context and I am the type of person that is AGAINST stereotypes and racism and this is like a nightmare to be accused of being the type of person that I AM NOT. The thread doesn't make me feel as uncomfortable as the fact that there is a double standard with most of the replyers. Why is MY word choice not as allowed as your is? I meant, manly, like my face looks UNFEMININE, and that's okay that I'm a girl who wants to look like a girl.. What's wrong with that I embrace who I am? I didn't say If anyone feels differently, that's bad. I meant, hey, am I the only one whose face is best framed with long hair?

[chahuahuas]

I didn't ask does everyone think that short hair on a woman is manly. I asked did anyone else FEEL manly, implying, that even though I know it's not a big deal, my face looks so unfeminine and pretty, to me, MY face, not EVERY woman's face, when my hair is short. What an unwelcoming place. I didn't violate any guidelines. I LOVE that you're entitled to your opinions and views, but you feel I'm not entitled to mine. And you are certainly not respectful of my feelings as an individual, just because my post didn't say what you thought it should. What's worse, is that my post was taken out of context.


Woa. woah, woah woah. Jujube never said you violated any guidelines. Noone is attacking you, calm down. She was discussing the topic you brought up, same as everyone else, and she merely said
As for blanket statements like "short hair is unfeminine/manly" or about "liking all women to have long hair," well, maybe I'm being too sensitive, but they make me feel kind of unwelcome.
How is she, or anyone else, not being respectful of your feelings as an individual?

ETA:


I don't think anyone is saying that you're not entitled to YOUR opinion, just choosing to voice their own which happens to not coincide with yours.

Some may have been offended by what you wrote, which happens. Others (like myself) are just curious about what you're saying and are just throwing things out there to see what you mean.

I don't agree with what you've written. But not agreeing doesn't mean attacking, it just means not agreeing

Exactly, Bene!

ETA #2:
Obviously, I don't think manly means ugly! I'm married to and in love with a man, my husband! Hello? I meant that I want a feminine, pretty face like a queen or princess, and when my hair is short, my face is ugly and I feel like, huh, I look like a dude, not a pretty girl.

...I meant, manly, like my face looks UNFEMININE, and that's okay that I'm a girl who wants to look like a girl.. What's wrong with that I embrace who I am? I didn't say If anyone feels differently, that's bad. I meant, hey, am I the only one whose face is best framed with long hair?

Just because you think men are attractive, doesn't mean you necessarily think that women who are [in your perspective] "manly" are attractive. I'm not sure what you are trying to show us with that statement. Finding "men" are attractive and finding "manly women" [again, from your own perspective] attractive are two different things.

[Mommyof4]

My DBF does't want my hair any longer than waist length either but I'm sure he'll love it once it gets past that. If not I'll love it enough for both of us :D

:) That's how I feel about my hair! Too funny! I plan to grow it and grow it and trim all my bad ends off, and if my hubby doesnt like my hair, then oh well, I will!

[neko_kawaii]

I think the most feminine I ever felt was when my head was shaved, so no, for me personally I have no associations with long hair and femininity. Hair of all lengths can look beautiful on both men and women, it really just depends on the individual, the style of their hair, and their body language. And even after all that, each individual who views the person-in-question is going to have their own take on the subject's "femininity" based on their own cultural background.

At the end of the day you have to do for yourself what make you happy to be in your own skin. OP, please don't leave LHC because you initiated an interesting discussion!

[Mommyof4]

Woa. woah, woah woah. Jujube never said you violated any guidelines. Noone is attacking you, calm down. She was discussing the topic you brought up, same as everyone else, and she merely said
How is she, or anyone else, not being respectful of your feelings as an individual?

ETA:



Exactly, Bene!

"Feel free to leave if you're not ready to respect the forum guidelines. You did say in your original post that you liked "all women" to have long hair; you can't say that you'd like "all women to have huge breasts" or "all people to be white" and expect such a thread to stay light-hearted."

If this was said to you, it wouldn't hurt your feelings? I did NOT say I like ALL women to have long hair? I said I liked the way long haired women looked?? Why is it fine that you like something, but not okay, when I like something different?

[chahuahuas]

"Feel free to leave if you're not ready to respect the forum guidelines. You did say in your original post that you liked "all women" to have long hair; you can't say that you'd like "all women to have huge breasts" or "all people to be white" and expect such a thread to stay light-hearted."

Oops, I skimmed over that bit. My bad!:o

[Eboshi]

Obviously, I don't think manly means ugly!
It is not so obvious to me. And, looking over the responses of others, they seem equally confused. :confused:


I'm married to and in love with a man, my husband! Hello?
I have no idea what this means in context with this thread. I really don't.

As I've said before, why not look around at the rest that TLHC is offering? If this thread is upsetting you so much, why keep returning to it?

[Mommyof4]

I think the most feminine I ever felt was when my head was shaved, so no, for me personally I have no associations with long hair and femininity. Hair of all lengths can look beautiful on both men and women, it really just depends on the individual, the style of their hair, and their body language. And even after all that, each individual who views the person-in-question is going to have their own take on the subject's "femininity" based on their own cultural background.

At the end of the day you have to do for yourself what make you happy to be in your own skin. OP, please don't leave LHC because you initiated an interesting discussion!


It isn't interesting to me anymore though. It's sad. I don't understand why my post came across as "I have deep rooted issues with short haired women, men, and I am insecure, just because I prefer my face to have long hair..."

I just don't want to post new things and interract on LHC again, and people go, "oh thats the chick that is prejudice and insecure and hates long haired men and short hair women."

I didn't expect everyone to feel like I did, but I didn't expect to be accused of being prejudiced, which the girl with pug keeps making comments about small waists and skin color and I don't see how that is the same. I am not insecure, I just LOVE long hair and I miss it.. I guess I expected posts like, "naw, I LOVE my short pixie and I feel like a fairy with it. It's probably just your face shape." or " yes, i want to be like rapunzel, too!"

I didnt expect my whole post to be picked apart and for my morality to be questioned. :(

[Mommyof4]

It is not so obvious to me. And, looking over the responses of others, they seem equally confused. :confused:


I have no idea what this means in context with this thread. I really don't.

As I've said before, why not look around at the rest that TLHC is offering? If this thread is upsetting you so much, why keep returning to it?

I explained that I must not think manly is a bad thing or a word that implies a bad look because that would mean to say I don't like men or manliness, and I do:confused: I changed it to ugly because that is what I felt like explained how my face looks to me with short hair.

[l0nd0nbr1dg3]

I didn't feel masculine at all, even when it was a really short pixie. It was just no fun to style and u feel like u have no hear on Ur head cause they took so much weight off. It was also hard to buy clothes because with all your hair gone your body can look so bad and u just don't get exited about clothes

[Bene]

Woah, no one questioned your morality.

Look around, there's another thread about hair cheating, in which I stated my opinion that extensions and wigs counted a "cheating". Plenty of people didn't agree with me. They stated their opinions, and someone even came in with the wiki definition for the word "cheating" :laugh: I saw it as an open discussion where people shared their thoughts on it.

C'mon, trust me. In 2 hours, most people won't (at least I won't) even remember the big issue in this thread, but they will remember that their opinions were seen as attacks. And then 5 months from now, someone will start this same exact thread and those people will find ways to re-word their opinions on it or forgo posting altogether.

[ladyfey]

So sorry that you have been mistreated on this forum, Mommyof4! You don't really need to leave, ignore people who have chips on their shoulders. I have run into a few people who just want to take offense here on LHC. You know the kind of person you are, it doesn't matter if others don't.

[Mommyof4]

Woah, no one questioned your morality.

Look around, there's another thread about hair cheating, in which I stated my opinion that extensions and wigs counted a "cheating". Plenty of people didn't agree with me. They stated their opinions, and someone even came in with the wiki definition for the word "cheating" :laugh: I saw it as an open discussion where people shared their thoughts on it.

C'mon, trust me. In 2 hours, most people won't (at least I won't) even remember the big issue in this thread, but they will remember that their opinions were seen as attacks. And then 5 months from now, someone will start this same exact thread and those people will find ways to re-word their opinions on it or forgo posting altogether.

Well, opinions were seen as attacks, because it left the opinion about the way one's own face looks with long/short hair to what kind of person I was and why it was wrong for me to like myself looking feminine.

[Mommyof4]

So sorry that you have been mistreated on this forum, Mommyof4! You don't really need to leave, ignore people who have chips on their shoulders. I have run into a few people who just want to take offense here on LHC. You know the kind of person you are, it doesn't matter if others don't.

:) thanks for the support

[krissykins]

So sorry that you have been mistreated on this forum, Mommyof4! You don't really need to leave, ignore people who have chips on their shoulders. I have run into a few people who just want to take offense here on LHC. You know the kind of person you are, it doesn't matter if others don't.

(bolding mine)

I don't think anyone mistreated her :confused: Bene basically explained what she thought of the post, I don't see how it was offensive.

I'm confused. But I'd like to say, short hair definitely makes me feel more masculine.

ETA: I see now that it was someone else's post who made you feel attacked, but I think they were just trying to question the wording as well.

[ladyfey]

:) thanks for the support
My pleasure! Seriously, I would just stop reading this thread if I were you. I've done the same when people start getting unkind.

[Mommyof4]

(bolding mine)

I don't think anyone mistreated her :confused: Bene basically explained what she thought of the post, I don't see how it was offensive.

I'm confused. But I'd like to say, short hair definitely makes me feel more masculine.

Well, when I said that ^, it was bad.. maybe its because I'm a newbie, so I havent learned that it's fine to be rude and contentious. Thanks for the people who have only said nice things. I think it's a lost art!

[krissykins]

Well, when I said that ^, it was bad.. maybe its because I'm a newbie, so I havent learned that it's fine to be rude and contentious. Thanks for the people who have only said nice things. I think it's a lost art!

Mommyof4, I'm sorry that you feel attacked. I'm sure that no one was tried to make you feel that way. LHC is a very diverse community. I think that Bene was trying to dissect the meaning of your post, not tell you that it was bad :flower:

[Eboshi]

Well, when I said that ^, it was bad.. maybe its because I'm a newbie, so I havent learned that it's fine to be rude and contentious. Thanks for the people who have only said nice things. I think it's a lost art!

Mommyof4, I'm saying this with all the kindness that I have: This is NOT how to make friends on a forum. It is difficult to interpret online posts sometimes as tone of voice and facial expression is missing. What I am gathering from your posts however is not pretty.

With that, I take my own advice and will be reading other threads on this forum.

[oktobergoud]

Sighhhh can we just all make peace and go further with our lives? ;)

Mommyof4, I don't think you wanted to offend anybody (and I didn't feel offended, but that's more because I never felt really masculine with a pixie. In the beginning, yes, but eventually I loved it and made me very feminine! But that's not my point right now :P) BUT I think the way you said it was what put some people of. I think some words could have been used differently and then it would have been a totally different topic! Not saying you said anything wrong, but in my opinion, some words were just.. well... wrongly chosen. But I do get that you didn't mean to offend!

However, I can imagine that some people were offended by it. And when they are, don't feel attacked! That's just the risk with a discussion board ;)

That's just my two cents and my last response.. I feel people are trying to respond here but don't get any reaction because of the heated discussion going on.. that would be such a waste of your thread :)

[vanity_acefake]

I'll give you all a giggle. This is me many many moons ago growing out my completely shaved head. I thought I looked really good. It is only looking back that I realise just how much like a lightbulb I looked!
I wore very girly dresses, striped tights, big Dr marten boots and bucket loads of makeup.
I wouldn't say I felt feminine but I did feel girly.

http://i1098.photobucket.com/albums/g364/vanity_acefake/bd787710.jpg

[amaiaisabella]

I wouldn't say that I feel unfeminine with shorter hair, more.... awkward in my own body, I suppose. I feel like I'm big and bulky, like a lumbering giant, almost. But I've never come across anyone else with that feeling, so to each his own, I guess :)

That being said, I LOVED when I had that haircut Halle Berry used to have, the one with all the wisps? It's only these in-between lengths where I am right now, between chin and shoulder, where I feel this way. When my hair is longer, I feel more balanced with my body shape. I guess I'm good with one extreme or another on me, but it's the middle that's aggravating :P

[gthlvrmx]

I love your hair like that!!! So cute! I think curlies can pull off short hair a lot better. Your hair reminds me of my best friend growing up's hair. She pulls off chin length hair very well.
Not the men with curly hair without the proper hair cut :(
So unmanly. I'd rather feel like an exotic man.

[Bene]

Not the men with curly hair without the proper hair cut :(
So unmanly. I'd rather feel like an exotic man.


As a curly, I went through a stage where it was like... A mushroom and a homeless poodle mated and my head was their offspring. It was pretty bad :laugh:

[feb26]

yes, gods yes!! I had a mushroom cut in 7th grade (due to a bad perm which didn't set right and then had to be cut off). Even with shoulder length hair I feel boyish. I can't imagine going shorter than that, ever again. When I look at pics of me with shorter hair, I don't like them & have a hard time recognizing it as "me".

[nazzooyzo]

A mushroom and a homeless poodle mated and my head was their offspring. :laugh:

just to say i love this description :redgrin:

[thisischristine]

I wouldn't say that I feel unfeminine with shorter hair, more.... awkward in my own body, I suppose. I feel like I'm big and bulky, like a lumbering giant, almost. But I've never come across anyone else with that feeling, so to each his own, I guess :)
:P

I totally recognise this feeling! It's like I'm dwarfing my hair or something when there's less of it.

[chahuahuas]

However, I can imagine that some people were offended by it. And when they are, don't feel attacked! That's just the risk with a discussion board;)


Exactly, oktobergoud.




I'll give you all a giggle. This is me many many moons ago growing out my completely shaved head. I thought I looked really good. It is only looking back that I realise just how much like a lightbulb I looked!
I wore very girly dresses, striped tights, big Dr marten boots and bucket loads of makeup.
I wouldn't say I felt feminine but I did feel girly.

http://i1098.photobucket.com/albums/g364/vanity_acefake/bd787710.jpg

Awww, you look so cute here!! A little strange, but whoever said strange is a bad thing :D

(And I say strange in the most affectionate way possible, since it's coming from a girl who also loves to chop all her hair off wear ridiculous things on occasion!! :p)




Not the men with curly hair without the proper hair cut :(
So unmanly. I'd rather feel like an exotic man.

OMG! gthlvrmx! I've already told you how GORGEOUS I thought your hair was at that short chin length! :laugh: I don't think it was unmanly at ALL! In fact, I thought was hot stuff :thumbsup:

[whitestiletto]

When I had a pixie in college, I ran into an ex from highschool and he suggested, in an insulting manner, that I had become "a ****." I felt much less attractive even before he said that.

I feel a little mannish now even having bangs.

[sugar&nutmeg]

When I (used to) think short hair, I imagine Audrey Hepburn. Oooh, lovely pointy chin. Lovely big eyes, high cheekbones, lithe, waif-like body. Pixie-perfect. WANT!

Sadly, I am none of those. Short hair + me = too much face, not enough hair.

Oh! Reminds me of the 1980s movie "Educating Rita". She starts out as a hair stylist. There's a moment when this enormous lump of a pudding-faced woman sits down in her stylist's chair and hands her a pic of Princess Diana, and says "Make me look like this."

Uh-huh...no.

[HairFaerie]

OK, at risk of sounding crass (which I certainly am not intending), I am going to point out something that I see as very obvious but others might not think that way, so here I go out on a limb any way....

If a woman has a "manly" face with short hair, wouldn't she still have a "manly" face with long hair?!?!? I mean, your actual face doesn't change. I understand certain haircuts accentuate or de-accentuate certain features, like if you have a round or long face, certain hairstyles look more flattering for that particular shape. But, if you have a truly masculine face and you're a woman- having longer hair isn't going to change that. Same as if a woman has very small, delicate facial features, getting a pixie isn't going to change that. It won't instantly make her masculine!

That's just my opinion though.

:run:

[PinkyCat]

I don't understand why this thread got so "way over in the weeds" in the first place. :hatchet:

Don't we all love long hair here?

[oktobergoud]

OK, at risk of sounding crass (which I certainly am not intending), I am going to point out something that I see as very obvious but others might not think that way, so here I go out on a limb any way....

If a woman has a "manly" face with short hair, wouldn't she still have a "manly" face with long hair?!?!? I mean, your actual face doesn't change. I understand certain haircuts accentuate or de-accentuate certain features, like if you have a round or long face, certain hairstyles look more flattering for that particular shape. But, if you have a truly masculine face and you're a woman- having longer hair isn't going to change that. Same as if a woman has very small, delicate facial features, getting a pixie isn't going to change that. It won't instantly make her masculine!

That's just my opinion though.

:run:


Hahaha, this is so true! I guess you can hide your manly face with long hair better though.. although, now that I'm reading it, that might sound ridiculously offensive hehe :P Just kidding of course. I don't really think people with long hair are covering their faces, before anybody jumps on me ;)

[chahuahuas]

If a woman has a "manly" face with short hair, wouldn't she still have a "manly" face with long hair?!?!? I mean, your actual face doesn't change. I understand certain haircuts accentuate or de-accentuate certain features, like if you have a round or long face, certain hairstyles look more flattering for that particular shape. But, if you have a truly masculine face and you're a woman- having longer hair isn't going to change that.

Accentuating goes a loooong way. Check out some examples on this page full of makeovers catering to specific face shapes (http://www.thehairstyler.com/makeovers). I'm not sure if the "afters" on that webpage look better or worse (I'm on the fence), but they are certainly different. There's extra makeup and better lighting done in the afters too, but you can still get the idea.

Also, hair does alot to hide some features, especially the forehead!
Christina Ricci Normal Version:
http://www1.pictures.gi.zimbio.com/MTV+TRL+Presents+Christina+Ricci+Natalie+Portman+7 7HzugXB0Azl.jpg

Christina Ricci, "Fivehead" Version:
http://badhairday.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/cr48xx.jpg



ETA:



Don't we all love long hair here?

Nope. Check out the Super Shorties thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=18405). It's preeeetty darn big. And there are threads where someone chops off the damage in their longer hair (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=73697).

[Bene]

Hahaha, this is so true! I guess you can hide your manly face with long hair better though.. although, now that I'm reading it, that might sound ridiculously offensive hehe :P Just kidding of course. I don't really think people with long hair are covering their faces, before anybody jumps on me ;)


*jumps on you*

:laugh:

No, actually, the feature thing is a good point. A pixie would show off EVERYTHING, while longer hair might draw some attention away, even if it's not used to hide the face.


On the other hand, a bun (without bangs) pulls ALL the hair away from the face, doesn't that accentuate the features just as much as really short hair? Even short hair has something going on with it, like spiky bits or a deep part.


And, Annie Lennox, with her androgynous face managed to make "almost bald" look rather feminine, I think, even with the suit and tie.

[battles]

Accentuating goes a loooong way. Check out some examples on this page full of makeovers catering to specific face shapes (http://www.thehairstyler.com/makeovers).

I thought she just tilted her head for #1 and they called it a makeover. :doh:

[mrs_coffee]

Nope. I actually think I look pretty cute with short hair. I'm sure there are some people who think it's manly, but that's their opinion and they're entitled to it.

http://i297.photobucket.com/albums/mm215/tackyblueeyeshadow/FBAvi3-1-1.jpg

ETA: I do appreciate that this is a long hair *loving* community and not a short hair *hating* community. I hope you will stick around and maybe either word things more carefully or don't take opposing opinions so personally.

[Fadedbluedreams]

Again, I don't care how anyone else wants to be.. I just meant I MYSELF don't like to feel that way.. I didn't deem myself a representative of every woman, just MYSELF. I just want to let you know that I found nothing at all wrong or offensive about any of your statements, and I think it's all perfectly fine to say what you think, albeit with politeness. I personally look less feminine and feel less so with short hair and don't really think it's a big deal to say so, or to think so, or to think it about someone else. I mean, we all have opinions, and we have a right to them, and I wish people would stop whining and feeling personally attacked. I've read so much of "Waah, I'm offended, or whatever, and " I hate stereotypes". You know what I do when something someone says offends me? I don't reply or continue reading, and then I get over it. Problem solved.
Disclaimer: this isn't a personal attack to any specific person who commented previously, I've just come across so much of that on this lovely community, it's really starting to turn me off, and that's a shame. /End rant. Please everyone have a lovely day. May it be filled with much chocolate and happy thoughts. :)

[ttverdy]

When I had short hair, I flipped back and forth between feeling cute and pixie-ish and feeling manly. Depended on the day.

[whitestiletto]

I read some sociology research articles once that found that men, on average, found a face more attractive when framed by longer hair rather than shorter hair. Same face, different hair. Of course that is in a lab setting where they don't actually know the personality and such of the girl. First impressions aren't the end-all of beauty.

[ecologystudent]

It didn't change the way I felt- but apparently everyone else thought I was a guy when I had short hair.

[racrane]

I didn't feel manly with a chin length bob. But I did feel stupid and not myself. I felt it wasn't flattering - I felt being a little plump didn't look good with my particular cut. I felt prettier with long hair. So, not "manly" but definitely not comfortable.

[October]

I'm just gonna say - I have seen girls who do look like cute young boys with very short hair. Honestly, I've had to wonder about a few people - even here on this site - and then when I see them with long hair, it becomes apparent they are female/male. The opposite holds true, too. I've worked with cute young guys who had long hair and were constantly called ma'am or her because costumers truely did not know before they opened their mouth and spoke. It's not always that way, but sometimes it is. I think I personally would look like a cute young boy if I cut my hair super short... I think I would look exactly like my brother (people think we are twins already, as it is.. I dont need to add to the confusion).

[Mesmerise]

i didn't feel manly but yes less feminine. but i think that is also because my clothes can be quite boyish. i do love short hair though and a lot of woman look beautiful and more suited with it

This is like me... I'm never gonna look like a man (not that I'm particularly feminine looking... I'm just too small to look masculine), but I don't dress very femininely usually... so with short hair I usually feel less pretty and less feminine than I do with my long hair.

I think short hair can look lovely too. I always admired Linda Evangelista when I was younger, and I had this deluded idea that I could look good with the short hair she used to sport LOL...yeah...

[Nae]

I feel equally girly with short or long hair but it seems to me that since I am so tall that when my hair is short and I am wearing something non-form fitting from the back I get a lot more "sirs" called out to get my attention instead of "ma'ams."

(EDT: You will have to forgive the previous sentence. I fully admit that it is a horrible run-on nightmare.)

Being called "sir" annoys me. Plus I am too lazy to want to do my pixie cut hair. Thus I am a good two years out from my last pixie cut and won't be looking back into the land of "Excuse me!! Sir!!"

Pfft. I am confused enough already.

[Mesmerise]

I'm just gonna say - I have seen girls who do look like cute young boys with very short hair. Honestly, I've had to wonder about a few people - even here on this site - and then when I see them with long hair, it becomes apparent they are female/male. The opposite holds true, too. I've worked with cute young guys who had long hair and were constantly called ma'am or her because costumers truely did not know before they opened their mouth and spoke. It's not always that way, but sometimes it is. I think I personally would look like a cute young boy if I cut my hair super short... I think I would look exactly like my brother (people think we are twins already, as it is.. I dont need to add to the confusion).

Yeah, I remember a guy that went to my uni and my friend and I used to try to figure out if he was a guy or a girl! He had shoulder length curls and wasn't particularly masculine looking!

Then there was a girl in one of my classes, and it took me awhile to figure out if she was male or female. She had short hair in a style that wasn't particularly feminine (some pixies are definitely more feminine than others), but I finally realised she had boobs when she wasn't wearing a lab coat :o (it was a microbiology prac class so we always had to wear them)!

It always scared me that I'd be mistaken for a boy with really short hair, but fortunately it never happened! (Or if it did...no one ever told me lol).

[Melon Collie]

I read some sociology research articles once that found that men, on average, found a face more attractive when framed by longer hair rather than shorter hair. Same face, different hair. Of course that is in a lab setting where they don't actually know the personality and such of the girl. First impressions aren't the end-all of beauty.


Imagine going from this:

http://i45.photobucket.com/albums/f52/animul92/IM000790.jpg


To this:
http://i45.photobucket.com/albums/f52/animul92/Picture0002.jpg


Anyone can tell you that first thing people notice is your face, which is on your head with your hair. And we are taught from a young age that boys have short hair while girls should have long hair. Can you guess where this is going?

Anywho... While I had my pixie cut I was mistaken for a male on many occasions. Granted I don't have the most feminine features (I've been told I have quite androgynous facial features.) and I tend to wear jeans and t-shirts, but with long hair I have yet to be mistaken for the opposite sex.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say here is, if men find longer hair on a woman more attractive then wouldn't you have the same result with women due to social expectations?

[AshleyTheRed]

I love short hair on other people, but I could never pull it off. :/

I like the way my hair looks when it's long.

[Athena's Owl]

I couldn't look like a man if I was bald as a cueball, so no, short hair never made me feel manly. Nor did anyone ever mistake me for a man when I had short hair.

[embee]

No, I just felt uglier than usual. Very depressing. Not that I look all that much better with long hair in an updo, but I *feel* better.

[xoxophelia]

I think it would be pretty difficult for me to facially look like a man since I have very rounded feautures but I would be concerned about how I would look from a distance. It isn't unusual for me to wear baggy sweatshirts or long shorts in the summer and since I am 5'9" I think it could possibly cause confusion.

[xxaimsxx]

I've always felt prettier with long hair. Even others around me have agreed i look better with it and it suits me. I've never felt comfortable with my short hair, never. It used to be very long up until a few years ago and the only reason i cut it in the first place was because i had to, it was damaged.
I always either wore extensions or wore my hair up when it was very very short. Now its still short and i never wear it out.... i just dont like it :/

[Mesmerise]

I read some sociology research articles once that found that men, on average, found a face more attractive when framed by longer hair rather than shorter hair. Same face, different hair. Of course that is in a lab setting where they don't actually know the personality and such of the girl. First impressions aren't the end-all of beauty.

When I was in uni, I had my (very damaged) hair cut from BSL+ to just on shoulder length. A guy I knew came up to me and said, "Why did you cut your hair? You were absolutely stunning with long hair!" and I have to say... no one had ever called me stunning before LOL. My hair wasn't even that short (in a relative scale...compared to pixie for example) after I'd had it cut.

But yes, I think my face looks prettier surrounded by long hair...which is why I like being able to wear it loose ;).

[EdG]

You know, it was only a matter of time until a man responded to this thread.

I feel like a man regardless of my hair length. :)
Ed

[xxaimsxx]

When I was in uni, I had my (very damaged) hair cut from BSL+ to just on shoulder length. A guy I knew came up to me and said, "Why did you cut your hair? You were absolutely stunning with long hair!" and I have to say... no one had ever called me stunning before LOL. My hair wasn't even that short (in a relative scale...compared to pixie for example) after I'd had it cut.

But yes, I think my face looks prettier surrounded by long hair...which is why I like being able to wear it loose ;).

You know after youve said that. I wonder if men realise or notice damaged hair? lol.
Not that im calling men stupid, but yeah same thing happened to me.

[Gumball]

You know, it was only a matter of time until a man responded to this thread.

I feel like a man regardless of my hair length. :)
Ed

Seconded! :gabigrin:

[EdG]

Seconded! :gabigrin:High-five, Gumball! :hifive:
Ed

[Keller1128]

I definitely do. I remember one particular cut in high school...I was walking to a store one time and I think I overheard someone asking their friend if I was a boy. Looking back, I probably heard wrong because it would be pretty hard for me to look like a boy but that's what I thought happened. I do think long hair is more feminine and beautiful (as long as it's healthy!) and I don't think it can be too long.

[Springlets]

I personally don't like to wear my hair up or short but that's more to do with my face shape rather than feeling like I look manly.

I don't think everyone can pull of short hair, but when I think of Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday or Natalie Portman when she shaved her head even, I don't think of manly. ;)

[Helix]

I guess it just depends on your personality (for some hair is a security blanket) and how you accentuate your other feminine assets. I've seen women rock baldies and still look feminine. Don't think anyone would look at Amber rose and mistake her for a man.

When I had an EL bob I didn't feel manly. Just more exposed and slightly less feminine. I offset that by dressing more feminine and sometimes playing with it for that boy meets girl look.

[oktobergoud]

I feel equally girly with short or long hair but it seems to me that since I am so tall that when my hair is short and I am wearing something non-form fitting from the back I get a lot more "sirs" called out to get my attention instead of "ma'ams."

(EDT: You will have to forgive the previous sentence. I fully admit that it is a horrible run-on nightmare.)

Being called "sir" annoys me. Plus I am too lazy to want to do my pixie cut hair. Thus I am a good two years out from my last pixie cut and won't be looking back into the land of "Excuse me!! Sir!!"

Pfft. I am confused enough already.

Haha I used to have that at work! We all wear the same clothes (though fitting) and I had a lot of kinds saying 'SCUZE ME SIR SIR SIR SIR!' and when I would turn around (most of the time they just saw my back) they just went on 'SIR SIR MISS MISS MISS MISS!' haha hilarious! Or sometimes they realized how embarrassing it might have been (I wasn't embarrassed, kids are kids, hysterical and all :P) and just stood there with their jaw dropped to the floor... realizing I was not a man haha! I guess I have a girly face so people never saw me for a man, unless they just saw my back :P
Sometimes I just reply in a very low voice 'Yeeeees?' :eyebrows:

[Ligeia_13]

Yes I do. My facial features aren't exactly feminine. And I have no upper lip to speak of, which I always feel takes away from my femininity. I just look like a boy with short hair. Its always been an issue with me. I feel manly with my hair tied back too. Up until I was 15, I never wore my hair up because I thought eveyone thought I was a guy.

[DavidN]

You know, it was only a matter of time until a man responded to this thread.

I feel like a man regardless of my hair length. :)
Ed

Thirded, Ed!:rollin:

[Mina17]

I had short hair for awhile and one of the reasons I am growing it out is that I did feel like I looked boyish and not feminine. People told me I didn't but I felt that way. I also feel that as I am growing older my facial features are changing a little, not as "soft" if you know what I mean, and I need the longer hair to look more feminine.

[Alaia]

I don't feel either way. I have never had it short enough to be mistaken for man, though. I do have a friend who totally rocks the pixie and you could never, ever mistake her for a man.

DH used to have hair longer than mine and he always felt manly :tongue:

[Rebecca.1905]

I feel less feminine with short hair. I'm sure there are reasons for it, but I never really gave the why's of it a whole lot of thought because it was easily resolved. I'm almost solidly waist now, so no more manly feelings! W00t!

[October]

Many girls can definitely get away with short cuts, like Natalie Portman, Kiera knightley, ect. But, they have really delicate small features. I don't, so I don't believe I could - which is fine for me since I don't want short hair anyway. Like I said earlier, I think I would look like my brother... with boobs.

[Othala]

Yes, I feel decidedly de-feminized with short hair. I fell more mannish and I really don't like it.

[Nae]

Haha I used to have that at work! We all wear the same clothes (though fitting) and I had a lot of kinds saying 'SCUZE ME SIR SIR SIR SIR!' and when I would turn around (most of the time they just saw my back) they just went on 'SIR SIR MISS MISS MISS MISS!' haha hilarious! Or sometimes they realized how embarrassing it might have been (I wasn't embarrassed, kids are kids, hysterical and all :P) and just stood there with their jaw dropped to the floor... realizing I was not a man haha! I guess I have a girly face so people never saw me for a man, unless they just saw my back :P
Sometimes I just reply in a very low voice 'Yeeeees?' :eyebrows:

Lol, yes, I used to get the look of horror whenever I would turn around. And yes, it was mostly teens and younger who would just assume from behind that tall+short hair=man. ;)

[Avital88]

my bf told me the same before, like i dont want youre hair to be to your butt. its too long and things like that.
now he is used to it and not really noticing it, except for me pushing him all the time to get off my hair :)

[Avital88]

Many girls can definitely get away with short cuts, like Natalie Portman, Kiera knightley, ect. But, they have really delicate small features. I don't, so I don't believe I could - which is fine for me since I don't want short hair anyway. Like I said earlier, I think I would look like my brother... with boobs.

whahahah this one is too funny. :D the last sentence ofcourse..

[elbow chic]

Not really-- a little more carefree and reckless and playful and young, but not mannish. Longer hair feels older to me, more matronly and dignified and responsible.

I'm not as much fun as I was in my short-haired unfettered early 20s but I'm also not quite as stupid, either. :laugh:

There are a lot of ways to be feminine, I reckon. Or masculine, for that matter. I'm not a total gender-is-fiction kind of person but it seems to me like there are a lot of ways to live out gender identity.

I disagree that you have to have small features to wear short hair, though. It does help you pull off a certain look with it, but I don't think that "pixie-waif" look is the only way for a woman to look good with short hair.

[Squeak toy]

I really looked like a boy when I had my short hair disaster. I have always thought the same thing about wearing it pulled back all the way. I have bangs to look more feminine and I normally wear a style that does not have it all strait back like a lace braid into a long braid, French pigtails or some think with a part look better.

[duckhugger]

yeah short hair makes me feel manly. more so where I am currently living though. Newfoundland is kind of a funny place. here, if you have short hair you are either a; a man or b; a lesbian. there is nothing wrong with either of those things, but I am neither of them! it bothers me that people make assumptions based on looks. just one of the reasons I am growing it out :)

[Toadstool]

Mommyof4, I'm really surprised anyone got offended by your posts.
I have short hair, and I took no offence at anything you said, because I just felt you were talking about how you feel about yourself.
I'm not sure if I feel more feminine with long hair, what I do feel is more sensual.

[xoxophelia]

This may seem odd but I can see long hair as both uber-feminine and uber-masculine. I see it as being able to bring out both the femininity in a woman and the masculinity in a guy. Perhaps because it sort of adorns what is already there.

[elbow chic]

I think part of it is that there are feminine short haircuts and masculine ways to wear it long... it's not just the plain old length, it's also about how it's styled.

My short hair was not the kind of cut you could get at the barber's shop for 8 dollars. Had a couple of bad haircuts in there, mostly when I tried to save a few bucks and get it done on the cheap instead of going to my regular stylist.

Those did look pretty rough. :laugh:

[kamikaze hair]

i think you can look both masculine, or feminine with either short hair or long hair. I have actually had my hair short four times in my life, all were ok, except for one where i cut it pixie cut short, which was fun, but it was challenging for me to feel totally girlie. having said that, sometimes even now with long hair, i just cant be bothered and look absolutely frightening (and manly like i'm sure!) so it's definitely about how you feel inside. I love pixie cuts on girls, i know most people get jealous if they see girls with lots of lovely long hair (i do to, but i know thats something i can do for myself EVENTUALLY) but i get totally jealous if i see a pretty girl in a pixie cut looking all cute, not even in my wildest dream could i pull off a look so feminine. Pixie cuts, and short hair cuts can look really feminine (in my opinion)

:cheese:PARTY PARTY PARTY!!!!! the cheese says PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!

[skara_brae]

Whoa, what a thread.

For myself, I have had my hair cut above shoulder length exactly once in my life. I didn't feel mannish, but I didn't feel attractive: the cut took a few years off me, which is a bad thing when you are 16! I also have pretty straight hair, though. And somewhat rounded facial features.

My sister has had short hair all her life. Pre-puberty, she frequently got mistaken for a boy -- and she loved it, because "boys get to do more interesting things anyway". She has rocked the pixie cut ever since, and there is absolutely no way anyone would mistake her for a man now. Short hair suits her personality and style very well. I can't even begin to try to imagine her with longer hair.



It's sad that one should comply to the "traditionally feminine" beauty standard in order to "feel" feminine. I feel feminine because I'm a woman, not because I have a 24-inch waist.

Femininity and masculinity really are culturally taught and ingrained, though. For most people, the dictates of our birth culture are really all we have to define what is masculine or feminine. Someone who's studied Gender Studies could probably go on about this whole masculine vs feminine topic at far more length and in a far more interesting manner than I could, though.


I wonder if men realise or notice damaged hair? lol.
Not that im calling men stupid, but yeah same thing happened to me.

I think most men just don't care about hair that much. I'm not sure my husband even knows what a split end is.


Newfoundland is kind of a funny place. here, if you have short hair you are either a; a man or b; a lesbian. there is nothing wrong with either of those things, but I am neither of them! it bothers me that people make assumptions based on looks. just one of the reasons I am growing it out :)

Hi duckhugger, I forgot to welcome you on your introductory thread. I just wanted to say I am in Atlantic Canada but originally from the Mid-West. Back home there are some interesting "hair culture beliefs". Like, if there's long hair on a guy, he's probably Native. Other men with long hair are probably hippies or fat gamers. The vast majority of men wear their hair short. Women range all over...although we have a few religious communities where women wear their hair long and plain, so it's not so much of an issue to see waist length or longer.

Since I moved down here, though, I find that there is much less long hair on men in general, and much longer hair on women, on average. Quite a few of my female co-workers have BSL+ hair. I can think of only one male co-worker who has hair past his shoulders.


This may seem odd but I can see long hair as both uber-feminine and uber-masculine. I see it as being able to bring out both the femininity in a woman and the masculinity in a guy. Perhaps because it sort of adorns what is already there.

There is definitely a "warrior" aesthetic to a guy who has long hair with a certain kind of body type. Likely also culturally ingrained.

[Gemma]

Gotta agree with folks who don't agree with or particularly like the cultural moor that short hair is just for men, and long hair for women (or that either style ascribes some level of masculinity or femininity).

To answer the question, though; did I feel more 'manly' with short hair? No. I was freakin' ADORABLE. ;) :D

[krissykins]

You know, it was only a matter of time until a man responded to this thread.

I feel like a man regardless of my hair length. :)
Ed


Seconded! :gabigrin:


Thirded, Ed!:rollin:

LOL!!! You guys are awesome. :)

[BabyRay33]

I don't think I felt manly when I was 19 and chopped my hair into a pixie, but I didn't feel like myself...which is why I didn't like it. I wasn't mistaken for a guy ever...you can't mix me up from behind...the hips don't lie, LOL. But I felt like I had to wear more makeup and earrings than I did before, just to compensate.

Not sure exactly why, but I felt as if no eyeliner, no earrings + short very dark brown hair= not girlie anymore.

I don't consider myself an overtly girlie girl, but that stage brought it out more in me than any other.

[sugarpixie10988]

I don't feel manly, but I feel like I look much younger and more cutesy. Shortest I've eve had it has been chin length, I'm not sure how I'd feel if it were any shorter.

[Stub]

I don't feel manly when my hair is buzzed, but people, because of my tattoos I can only think, often mistake me for a man when it is that short. Especially in public ladies' rooms! I don't exactly have a small chest, I fail to see how they CAN, but they do!

[waialeale]

I LOVE short hair on OTHER people. Every time I have cut my hair short (anything above shoulders) I hated it. I felt very masculine. Probably goes back to kindergarten when my mom cut my tailbone length hair to a boy cut, yes a boy cut not just short I had the same haircut as boys. People use to think I was a boy. It must have traumatized me because I still remember people calling me a boy. I don't think it would be a problem if it wasn't in kindergarten. Sometimes I wish I could pull off short hair, like I said I love it just not on me :(

[Mrspuddinhead]

To answer your 1st question I have never felt manly with short hair. I've had chin length and even shorter. I don't know if you remember the show Jon and Kate plus 8.... any who I used to have my hair just like hers and I rocked if if I must say so my self. Picture below of chin length hair.

http://i52.tinypic.com/2vbkio7.jpg

To answer your 2nd question. For anything past waist my fiance finds it too long. I plan on growing to BCL. So my fiance will just have to deal. ;)

[celebriangel]

I didn't feel manly at all with short hair...I did, however, feel *androgynous*, which is a different feeling and kettle of fish altogether. I loved that feeling, actually, and stopped wearing makeup and feminine clothes entirely. It's quite a powerful feeling. But then I have always struggled with feeling "feminine" - I have internal debates about what to wear because masculine cut clothes do not flatter my extreme hourglass figure at all, yet anything too feminine makes me feel silly.

My long hair, however, is not making me feel more feminine - just less androgynous. Fancy layered things and fashionable cuts would and have, though, so I am very happy to be avoiding those. I have become slightly better with the whole issue, though I still avoid overly feminine colours, prints and styles. By which I really mean "girly" - I mean, corsets are fairly feminine, and I love them.

It's a bit complicated for me, as you can probably tell. But the basic answer is, no, my short pixie did not make me feel masculine.

As regards "too long"...I think people assume that at a certain length hair *must*, by its nature, become "icky" - get stuff caught in it, or be unhealthy, or have straggly, thin ends. They have never seen superlong, healthy and beautiful hair. I would direct them to JJJlonghair's photos - utterly stunning. No one has yet said to me that some length is too long, but though I talk about my hair sometimes, I don't tend to share my exact goals. Sometimes I'll say "I want to be able to sit on it". But I tend to say this to my close friends, who are a rather alternative group anyway.

I do not think there is such a thing as "too long" - except in the case of "too long *for me*" - ie, when a person found their hair more pleasing at a shorter length. So, perhaps knee might be too long for me, because beyond fingertip it might become too difficult for me to take care of, or for someone else past tailbone just meant it got in the way all the time.

[slz]

I don't "fell" any "manly" with short hair - I AM just plain effing ugly, and that's a fact. Sigh.

[pepperminttea]

I don't think it's necessarily about gender for me, but feeling vaguely attractive. I feel ugly with short hair, it's not flattering on me, and if I ever did go pixie-short, I would be worried that people might think I was male because I don't wear make-up, don't favour dresses or high heels, and I'm not particularly well-endowed in the bust department for my size. In terms of conventional femininity, my hair and my earrings are the only things I really have. While there are some amazing women out there who can be sexy and undoubtedly feminine with no make-up and a shaved head, I know all too well that I'm not one of them.

[kwaniesiam]

Nope, I've felt no less female than I have with waist length hair or a buzzcut. Certain, uh, attributes of mine are irrevocably female so I'm sure that has helped.

[ratgirldjh]

I just cut my several inches from waist still fine wavy hair into a chin length bob.

I feel much more feminine than I did with long hair! This really surprised me - but when I thought about it I've had short hair a major part of my life and always felt more girly with shorter hair.

I also was surprised how much younger it made me feel and I don't know for sure if I look younger but I will say that almost immediately men started noticing me again!

Perhaps long hair (worn up in buns) was too intimidating on me?

[AshleyTheRed]

When my hair was short people couldn't tell if I was male or female. (It was before puberty)
I was a tom boy and my voice hadn't changed yet, so I started wearing girly earrings with my overalls and boots xD.

[Bonkers57]

I know what you mean! Wide hips and big boobs announce that I am female!


Certain, uh, attributes of mine are irrevocably female so I'm sure that has helped.

[Charlotte:)]

Yeah, my hair doesn't look good up lol. I always put my short ringlets all around my face when it's in a ponytail or bun and then it just looks like I didn't put my hair up right lol.

Haha, I do that too! Except instead of ringlets (my hair is straight), I just pull out the little wispy hairs around my face. It really does make a HUGE difference!