Fascinating article on gray hair by Ph.D.

[SurprisingWoman]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/vivian-diller-phd/gray-hair-double-standard_b_865193.html

Discuss.

:)

[Coan-Teen]

Personally I love gray/white hair. I hope to go completely gray/white one day myself but my biological parents are both into their forties with none. I think more women are feeling comfortable with going gray because more women are rejecting the idea that we shouldn't be gray. I do find it interesting that more men are uncomfortable with going gray these days.

I think women are increasingly rejecting the idea that we need to improve on what is natural for us, while men are increasingly aware that "improvement" may help them stay current (relevant, maybe?). It's an odd reversal.

[lacefrost]

50% of people would be gray? Wow! I can't imagine! You know, I think it would be so cool if everyone just let themselves hair their own natural hair color, like a "Don't Color For A Year" challenge or something. What would people look like? How would it affect how we see hair color? Would we appreciate the range of hair colors more? It's interesting how in classical literature there are so many different words for all the colors of hair: sable, flaxen, chocolate, jet, wheat, honey, auburn, gold, silver, white, salt and pepper, orange, firey, strawberry blond, etc etc. And now what colors for hair do we have? Black, brown, blond, gray, red. Sometimes there's dark brown and dirty blond but by and large we have 5 names now. It's kind of sad.

[Madora]

Well, the attitude towards women keeping their greys is changing..but not that fast! Maybe in another 10 to 15 years. The focus still is on the "youthful look"..and that doesn't mean gray hair.

Personally, one of the most gorgeous heads of hair I ever saw was years ago at the George Michael salon in NYC. A lady in her 60s was brushing her just below shoulders gray hair..and it was the most exquisite shade of platinum you ever saw, and shone like a sterling silver loving cup. It was amazing!

[curlymarcia]

Thanks for sharing. I find men with gray hair to be interesting people. I can't believe men are coloring their hair :( Another sad thing is that I haven't seen many woman with gray hair. The few gray women that I know are in their 70's and older. I wonder how younger woman with grays will look if they shown their natural mane.

[Nevvie]

That article makes me think of my Mom. She started finding silvers sometime in her 30's and dyed for years. She's the no makeup, jeans and t-shirt, wash, brush and go type person so it was her one vanity. Around her late 40's (she's almost 58 now) she just decided to embrace the gray and stop dying. I think she was even looking forward to her gray locks. But it turns out she only has maybe 25% gray, if even. It's rather weird to watch someone go from being terrified of a few gray strands to being bummed for not having enough.

[Athena's Owl]

I am so sad that I only have a few gray hairs. I saw my first gray hair before 30 but not many have come to join the party a decade later. I had to fight to defend the few gray hairs I had in my 30s - people would actually walk over and *pull them out!* I'd yelp and get mad and say, "Don't you pull out my gray hair! I *earned* that!"

but I might have to wait a long time for my hair to go gray.

[Mesmerise]

Where I live... it's very very rare to see younger women embrace their gray hair (and by younger I mean under 50). I noticed a woman at the swimming pool a few weeks ago, and I was sort of fascinated by her hair because she had grays in it...not even that many... just a few scattered throughout...and although I know there are Renegrays here on LHC I realised that in real life, I just don't SEE that! I mean... I thought of her as "graying" and yet, I would probably have 100x as many gray hairs as she has (if I were to stop colouring)!!

I see a lot more men embracing grays, but not women... very few women under 50 or 60, and certainly I can't recall seeing anyone under 40 who actually embraced their grays.

And yeah... I can't do it... I just can't :( I have decided to let a silver streak grow into the side of my hair, but I just am not ready to go gray, and it would be really really hard to grow it out anyway cause I'm a henna head!! I figured that when I'm finally able to embrace it, I'll shave all my hair off and start again :D.

I actually think it's because I don't like drawing attention to myself more than I have to in what I perceive is a "negative" way. A year ago a teenage girl noticed grays in my regrowth and commented on it "you're too young to have gray hair!!" she said, and it made me quite self conscious. I'm already self conscious of other physical features of myself, and I don't want any more... if that makes sense. I do wish I could see my gray hair in a more positive light, but I don't like the idea of people pitying me for my prematurely gray hair, or commenting on it! (Why is it that there are some things people think it's perfectly okay to comment on...while there are others they wouldn't comment on???)

I will also say this... rightly or wrongly I tend to perceive gray haired people as older, even if they are otherwise quite youthful looking. I am sort of proud of the fact that people generally think I'm a lot younger than I am, and I know that if I let my natural hair show through, they'd no longer think that! Even quite elderly women who dye their hair look "younger" to me than their younger counterparts who don't dye. I noticed this particularly while living in a small town a couple of years ago. There were a couple of relatively young women who were completely gray/white and a couple of older women who dyed, and my perception was that the younger women with gray hair were older than their biological age, while the older women with dyed hair were younger. At the time I remember thinking about it and wondering why I had that perception, when it was obviously that these older women were dyed. I came to the conclusion that we see gray hair as = old age.

Anyway, one day I will embrace my natural gray hair in all its glory... but I'm not sure I'm up for it yet!! I'm still at the "sensitive to be young and gray" stage and I like it that people think I'm in my 20s, and know that if I let my gray hair show they'd no longer think that about me :rolleyes:.

I guess there's a certain amount of vanity there as well ;) I'm not vain about much... but hair... yeah...

[agoddess2die4]

I'm 25, but I'm getting a sprinkling of gray in my hair. Both of my parents were mostly gray in their early thirties, but my mom had Grave's Disease and my dad was highly stressed, so I don't know if those caused or helped premature graying. I had a couple in high school but I didn't really notice because I've been dying my hair since I was 11/12, but I stopped dying almost two years ago because I was bored of caring for color and I've been noticing more and more. I swear every time I look at my head there's more! I can't riffle through any section of hair without seeing strands, but my hair is fine and it's going to take a lot more for them to be noticeable from a distance, but I'm sure by 30 there will be streaks at the rate I'm going.

My friends and some family are horrified by my gray hairs: how could I possibly not dye my hair (especially since I used to a hair dying fiend), it might make me look old! ...Despite the fact that I still get carded for R-rated movies and most people think I can't possibly be more than 20. :rolleyes: I personally think it looks cool. I have kind of oily hair naturally so they seem to sparkle and give light and dimension to my hair. It's part of the reason I stopped dying - natural highlights! The only person who doesn't harass me about it is my mom, and she's cool with having an almost fully white head of hair at 53, she often wears it with no shame. Well, that was until recently when she realized that it made her look like her mom so she dyed it again. :D But that had nothing to do with the fact that it was white, she could care less about that. Looking like her mother however...that's unforgivable. :p

ETA: My mom's white hair at my high school graduation in 2004: she's 46 there and wearing it proud!

http://i468.photobucket.com/albums/rr47/a0goddess2die4/AthenaMom-1.jpg

[xoerincolleen]

Very interesting article. It really sucks that it's "okay" for men to go gray but not women. I used to babysit for a young couple, and the husband was about 30 years old with a head of white hair. He was a doctor and was THE most distinguished man I've ever met. I'm sure the hair was part of it...he just looked so professional all the time! However, a young woman with gray or white hair would definitely not be perceived the same way in society. I think gray hair looks beautiful, but it's scary at the same time- it can age people. And I think that's because, like the article said, our society has it drilled into our heads that gray hair=old, especially on women.
Hmph. Just another double standard to deal with.
I'm 19 and have a white streak already...I'm going to let it be for now, but honestly, if it starts to spread a lot anytime soon, I'm going to start dying. Hopefully by the time my whole head starts to go gray, I'll be able to embrace it!

[Darkhorse1]

I don't think is this an accurate article--by sighting people whose careers depend on looks, who can say if those actors would prefer to color their gray than stay gray? Tom Cruise was in only 1 film with his natural hair color, which was pretty gray, and he still dyes his. In this case, I would venture to guess the actors stylists and managers have the final say on gray vs coloring.

So, given that, how many regular people color vs not? Men and women that is?

I was just talking to my hair dresser today as my grays are multiplying. What I'm noticing is that the texture and how my hair lies is very different with the grays vs my regular hair. So, for me, I like to color it as it helps it lay flatter and with longer hair, it looks better in my eye.

Since men keep their hair shorter, I think growing in grays would be easier because with length, comes that twist/kink. My brother and all guy friends/my dad, their gray is much different than mine. I didn't see this article delving into the fact that perhaps texture of gray is different from men vs women. (I would factor in hormones as the big culprit to women's gray being different).

I'm always envious of people here with gorgeous white hair. That's my goal--I hope my gray is a white gray, not a steely gray. I'm totally looking forwards to my gray when it's plentiful, but right now, I enjoy my coloring---it's the only pamper treatment I have for myself :)

[Anivenin]

Actually, I'm looking forward to going grey. My grandmere went grey in her teens, black hair with basically one side streak (beautiful hair, though she kept it rather short as she got older) and I hope to get mine early too. I think having a mixture of silver, white, and grey hair would be fab! While I do enjoy coloring, once my greys come in I plan on quitting.

[Slinks]

hmm .. I personally think that it is short hair that ages some woman not gray, some women really suit short hair but not all, for those short + gray = old .. so in my opinion, long + gray = chic, I'm also under the impression that the way you dress will also bring on the ageing clock .. conclusion, long gray hair and sylish 25 + clothing .. yeah !! bring it on .. :-)

[Mesmerise]

hmm .. I personally think that it is short hair that ages some woman not gray, some women really suit short hair but not all, for those short + gray = old .. so in my opinion, long + gray = chic, I'm also under the impression that the way you dress will also bring on the ageing clock .. conclusion, long gray hair and sylish 25 + clothing .. yeah !! bring it on .. :-)

I'm not sure that gray actually makes you look older per se it's more that people associate gray with old... and thus get the idea you're older than you are because they're not used to seeing younger people with gray hair.

I like the look of long silvery hair too...I just don't want something that makes me stand out more than I already do *sigh*.

[drquartz1970]

I am very slowly going gray. My first gray hair i saw was at 21, and i have white hair at the temples now 20 years later that is largely hidden and covered over with non-gray hair. I greatly admire people particularly women who surrender gracefully to having gray or white hair which says to me that they are comfortable in themselves. I find women with long gray or white hair to be quite distinguished and dignified. I will never dye my hair any colour and will allow mother nature to take her course in being my hairdresser.

[Panth]

50% of people would be gray? Wow! I can't imagine!

Well, no, she said "If people didn't color their hair, half of our current population would be 50 percent gray." So one quarter of people would be grey-haired. I have no idea why she phrased it as she did, because it's a really confusing silly way of putting it.

My other main funk with that article is that she seems not to know the difference between life expectancy and average age of death for an adult. If life expectancy is 48 years, that does not mean that the average person dies at age 48 ... except maybe from the 1960s onwards. The reason for that being that life expectancy is an average over the whole life and takes into account the (sometimes very high) mortality rate of the under 5s. So it is complete rubbish that no one would have seen white/grey-haired women. Any woman who survived to puberty, or even age 6, would have a much greater change of reaching their 60s and 70s. See here for some very interesting numbers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_expectancy#Life_expectancy_variation_over_tim e

And sorry, that is just one of my pet peeves. It made me really doubt the article's credibility seeing as there were those two obvious errors in it. As for letting oneself go grey, well, most women I see from day to day don't. My mum is, but she's never been one to be that concerned with her appearance and despite being in her early 60s she only has maybe a dozen or so white hairs. My grandma, on the other hand, dyed her hair until she was in her late 70s ... she finally gave up on the maintenance of dying and it looks lovely - a very pale silver. :)

[PianoPlaye]

I admit to double standards.
My hair can have all the grey, silver, white etc it wants. I've not tried to colour it in decades (if you count flirting with Sun-In as colouring?). My eyebrows however are dark, & any grey or white is seriously different in colour & texture & I pluck the single thread immediately...
I am all for going roan, and eventually back to the snow blonde I was born. (My offspring are doing their bit to help.)

[NotInPortland]

There definitely is that double standard. As for going gray myself...I really don't know what I'll choose to do until it starts to happen. I'm not sure when either of my parents went gray but remember my dad being gray since I was quite young and my mother has dyed her hair for years but I'd guess they both went grey in their 30s so I probably will too. I'd like to say I'll let it happen naturally and just go grey but in my early 30s? I really don't know if I could face it that early :( That link that gray=old is definitely the norm around here. Serious props to all those who let their hair gray natually with no interference at any point!

[Mesmerise]

My other main funk with that article is that she seems not to know the difference between life expectancy and average age of death for an adult. If life expectancy is 48 years, that does not mean that the average person dies at age 48 ... except maybe from the 1960s onwards. The reason for that being that life expectancy is an average over the whole life and takes into account the (sometimes very high) mortality rate of the under 5s. So it is complete rubbish that no one would have seen white/grey-haired women. Any woman who survived to puberty, or even age 6, would have a much greater change of reaching their 60s and 70s. See here for some very interesting numbers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_expectancy#Life_expectancy_variation_over_tim e


Yeah, this was my thought too when I read this article. Ironically I had this discussion with my husband just yesterday. I said, "Why do you think life expectancy is so much higher today than it was 100 years ago?" He started to talk about healthier people etc. and I said, "No... think about it... 100 years ago how many people died in early childhood and infancy?? If out of 5 people, two of them didn't even live to their fifth birthday, what's the average lifespan of the 5 going to be, even if three of them live into old age?" At that point he kinda go it ;)

Ergo an average lifespan of 48 hardly means that nobody had a chance to turn gray! Of course you had people living to their 70s and beyond...

[IvySchex]

It was an interesting article. I am 24 and have been find grays since I was 18. I have never dyed my dark brown hair. Personally, I am hoping for a streak of white in the front. :D

My mom hennas her grays. I have thought about using henna on my hair, but it just sounds like too much work.

I am not sure whether I would dye it later on or just leave it alone.

Thanks for sharing the article

Ivy

[silverjen]

I started going noticeably gray this past year, and I couldn't be more thrilled. It's partly because I've always looked some 10 years younger than my actual age. I get so blasted tired of people assuming I'm 30. It's injured my career--I've got 10 years more experience than people realize. I'll be so glad to look my actual age.

It also makes me feel a bit rebellious, in a good way. Those little wavy gray hairs seem so energetic and defiant , especially when they're first sprouting and sticking out every whichaway.

Lastly, I feel like I've been let off the hook, somehow. The internal pressure to conform to beauty standards has pretty much gone away. Perversely, now that I'm no longer feeling pressured to conform, I'm feeling much more free to pay attention to my appearance, and I enjoy how I look much more.

Going gray feels like a rebirth.

[Lilli]

My mom is 65 and she only has a few random grays. I am blonde so I think it won't really be an issue for me. I like gray hair and think it is lovely. My concern would be for women like my brother's wife: her gray is just a "skunk streak." Not a good look.

[Othala]

That article implies that grey-haired women are de-valued because their grey hair signals an end to their fertility and thus desireability, whereas grey-haired men are more valued because they are warriors who have survived to a greying age and are therefore made of strong stuff.

Whilst I can appreciate that point of view I also think a grey-haired female primate who has borne numerous children and reached old age is as strong genetically as that old silver-back gorilla. She has emotion connections with her offspring and is able to influence them and glean their support. She is likely to be a lot older than the old male and experienced more of life. More experience + more knowledge = more power, simplistically speaking.

By the way, I have a pro-ageing, not an anti-ageing outlook on life. I am welcoming, embracing and enjoying every grey hair, every wrinke and every hot look I get from younger men. The process of ageing is unstoppable and so am I until the day I die and another adventure begins.

[chenille]

I have a male friend who is a couple of years older than me and my husband. He started graying in his 20's and was almost totally gray by 30. When my DH and I got married, shortly before the ceremony, the photographer walked up to our friend and chirped, "And are you the father?" :rolleyes: So there can be drawbacks for guys too.

But I agree...a guy with gray hair isn't that uncommon, and generally there's no negative connotation to it. But as other folks have pointed out, women have to overcome perceptions that they're not taking care of themselves, or are simply outside the mainstream. Think about the cartoony stereotype of witches - they always have long gray hair.

Amusingly enough, I know one self-identified pagan...who is a lovely lady with gorgeous silver hair to her waist. And she's in her mid-40's, I think.

[Tabitha]

My mom is 65 and she only has a few random grays. I am blonde so I think it won't really be an issue for me. I like gray hair and think it is lovely. My concern would be for women like my brother's wife: her gray is just a "skunk streak." Not a good look.

I think skunk stripes are cool :tbear: and I'd be thrilled to get one. I'd also love to have grey hair like Olegraymare or like Kristen McMenemy who was recently on the cover of Vogue Italia and the star of the runway at Chanel. How great does she look here, on the cover of i-D magazine!

http://img705.imageshack.us/img705/1833/12605713050348266029827.jpg

My dad was salt and pepper already when I was little and now has beautiful silvery-white hair, but my mum has greyed in a rather messy way and I have a feeling I'm going like her :(

[battles]

I think skunk stripes are cool :tbear: and I'd be thrilled to get one. I'd also love to have grey hair like Olegraymare or like Kristen McMenemy who was recently on the cover of Vogue Italia and the star of the runway at Chanel. How great does she look here, on the cover of i-D magazine!

http://img705.imageshack.us/img705/1833/12605713050348266029827.jpg

My dad was salt and pepper already when I was little and now has beautiful silvery-white hair, but my mum has greyed in a rather messy way and I have a feeling I'm going like her :(

Her hair looks pretty, but that is one unattractive face she's making. :disgust:

[Yozhik]

I thought it was interesting to read that Caucasians apparently go gray much sooner than Asians and African Americans.

This holds true with my parents, with my father going completely gray by his mid-40s, and my mother is now almost 60, but still has only about 10% white hairs. :)

ETA: I guess it's important to add that my father is Caucasian, while my mother is Asian.

[jojo]

My mother has only a few greys and my late father was fully white by his 50's. I am 42 and had only very greys at 40, then I lost my dad and they came through thick and fast. I also smoke and have hypothyroidism so maybe this as well as grieving has made them come through quicker. I do like my greys though.

[WaterMusic]

Did anyone else notice the bizarre math inherent in this bullet point?

- There are 78 million Baby Boomers in the U.S. The oldest turned 65 this year and 10,000 more will reach that milestone every year for the next 19 years

[teela1978]

Well, no, she said "If people didn't color their hair, half of our current population would be 50 percent gray." So one quarter of people would be grey-haired. I have no idea why she phrased it as she did, because it's a really confusing silly way of putting it.

My other main funk with that article is that she seems not to know the difference between life expectancy and average age of death for an adult. If life expectancy is 48 years, that does not mean that the average person dies at age 48 ... except maybe from the 1960s onwards. The reason for that being that life expectancy is an average over the whole life and takes into account the (sometimes very high) mortality rate of the under 5s. So it is complete rubbish that no one would have seen white/grey-haired women. Any woman who survived to puberty, or even age 6, would have a much greater change of reaching their 60s and 70s. See here for some very interesting numbers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_expectancy#Life_expectancy_variation_over_tim e

And sorry, that is just one of my pet peeves. It made me really doubt the article's credibility seeing as there were those two obvious errors in it. As for letting oneself go grey, well, most women I see from day to day don't. My mum is, but she's never been one to be that concerned with her appearance and despite being in her early 60s she only has maybe a dozen or so white hairs. My grandma, on the other hand, dyed her hair until she was in her late 70s ... she finally gave up on the maintenance of dying and it looks lovely - a very pale silver. :)

I think you misunderstood your first "error", a person who has 50% gray is a person who has a mix of white and colored hairs on their head, so "If people didn't color their hair, half of our current population would be 50 percent gray." means that if people didn't color their hair half the population would be salt and pepper. Not sure I believe that statistic... I can believe that half the population would have some gray, but I think there would be more variation. It seems very unlikely that everyone would have the same ratio of colored to uncolored hairs.

ETA: I have been noticing more gray-haired women my age which is nice. Not often, but more than before. Clearly I'm not the only one prematurely greying and not the only one who decided dying sucks.

[boomtownrat]

My mom is 65 and she only has a few random grays. I am blonde so I think it won't really be an issue for me. I like gray hair and think it is lovely. My concern would be for women like my brother's wife: her gray is just a "skunk streak." Not a good look.

I think streaks can be cool, personally. As long as your brother's wife likes her "skunk streak" that's what matters most.


I'd also love to have grey hair like Olegraymare or like Kristen McMenemy who was recently on the cover of Vogue Italia and the star of the runway at Chanel. How great does she look here, on the cover of i-D magazine!

http://img705.imageshack.us/img705/1833/12605713050348266029827.jpg


She is my hair idol! Thanks for this photo, I hadn't seen it.

[Panth]

I think you misunderstood your first "error", a person who has 50% gray is a person who has a mix of white and colored hairs on their head, so "If people didn't color their hair, half of our current population would be 50 percent gray." means that if people didn't color their hair half the population would be salt and pepper. Not sure I believe that statistic... I can believe that half the population would have some gray, but I think there would be more variation. It seems very unlikely that everyone would have the same ratio of colored to uncolored hairs.

I did think that it could have been meant that way, but then chose to interpret it the other way as it made even less sense to me this way - as you say, half the population might have some grey, but it wouldn't be precisely 50% grey.

Which ever way you interpret it, I think you'd agree it's a silly and confusing way of phrasing it.

[Slinks]

My mom is 65 and she only has a few random grays. I am blonde so I think it won't really be an issue for me. I like gray hair and think it is lovely. My concern would be for women like my brother's wife:

I too like the skunk/stripe look ..

[Luna12345]

I saw a woman on Tv today with gray hair and I LOVED it, it suited her well and it was beautiful....especially because her hair was oddly alomost exactly like the evil lady in 101 dalmations! It was white with big black streaks/chunks going through, it was awsome!!!

[Zesty]

I don't think gray hair is a bad thing. I generally like the more natural look anyway (I've given up makeup entirely now, for example), and it can be really pretty and sparkly haha. My dad is mostly gray now, but I have no idea about my mom since she's been dyeing her hair for years and years to cover the gray... and my maternal grandmother who is over 70 still dyes her hair to cover the gray! So I'm kind of curious to see what my hair looks like when I'm 30 or 40. I've only ever found one gray hair on my head. Incidentally, I find them every once in a while on my boyfriend. :D He's generally horrified but I just think it's neat.

[Darkhorse1]

Now, just a side note--I was told--I could be mistaken, but somewhere I remember being told you cannot dye hair gray---you can strip hair, but you can't dye it gray. Gray is absence of color. I can ask my hair dresser next week, but I'm pretty sure another colorist told me that---so, that would mean those who have gray hair, unless it's natural, it's artificial.

[Xandergrammy]

That article makes me think of my Mom. She started finding silvers sometime in her 30's and dyed for years. She's the no makeup, jeans and t-shirt, wash, brush and go type person so it was her one vanity. Around her late 40's (she's almost 58 now) she just decided to embrace the gray and stop dying. I think she was even looking forward to her gray locks. But it turns out she only has maybe 25% gray, if even. It's rather weird to watch someone go from being terrified of a few gray strands to being bummed for not having enough.


I'm having an experience similar to your mom's. I stopped dyeing my hair 5 years ago in the hopes of attaining the pure white hair that my mother, aunt and grandmother had. Unfortunately, I think I got my other grandmother's hair color gene. I have white around my face with very little gray throughout the rest of my head. Oh well. :gabigrin:

[Xandergrammy]

My mom is 65 and she only has a few random grays. I am blonde so I think it won't really be an issue for me. I like gray hair and think it is lovely. My concern would be for women like my brother's wife: her gray is just a "skunk streak." Not a good look.

I have a "skunkie" and I love it.

[Mesmerise]

I too like the skunk/stripe look ..

Err yeah... if my hair did that naturally I wouldn't colour it! As it is I'm keeping one streak of my hair free from henna cause I wanna cultivate that look :D. I just picked the right side of my hair cause I have a few real silvery hairs there!!

[Mesmerise]

Now, just a side note--I was told--I could be mistaken, but somewhere I remember being told you cannot dye hair gray---you can strip hair, but you can't dye it gray. Gray is absence of color. I can ask my hair dresser next week, but I'm pretty sure another colorist told me that---so, that would mean those who have gray hair, unless it's natural, it's artificial.

Well ummm I'm not sure how gray can be an absense of colour. I mean it may be an absence of regular colour pigment, but gray IS a colour. Maybe not too many companies produce a real authentic gray hair dye though, cause people tend to want to cover their grays rather than flaunt them!

And umm as for the bolded line... well yeah, if it's not natural it probably is artificial ;)

[Luna12345]

Now, just a side note--I was told--I could be mistaken, but somewhere I remember being told you cannot dye hair gray---you can strip hair, but you can't dye it gray. Gray is absence of color. I can ask my hair dresser next week, but I'm pretty sure another colorist told me that---so, that would mean those who have gray hair, unless it's natural, it's artificial.

I think White would be absence of color, Gray is probably partial absence of color. I too have heard the same, you'd haveto strip ur hair color, there's something they have at the salon for that and it's not bleach.:) I think i even saw one at a drug store once, it said color stripper.

[Tabitha]

I understood that there was no such thing as "a grey hair": the overall effect of grey hair is white hairs (hairs with no pigment/melanin) sprinkled among the original hair colour.

There are "pearl" toners out there but they probably would give a very uniform effect compared with natural grey hair.

[spidermom]

I have never cared what's in, what's out, what's the norm, what's expected ... etc, etc, etc. I couldn't even read the entire article because it just doesn't matter to me what other people are doing or what people think about what other people are doing . Personally (which is all I really care about), I'd never be able to tolerate the upkeep, so permanent dye is and always has been NOT an option for me.

[Remyy]

My mom started getting grey in her 20's which makes me nervous because I just turned 20 this April! But, mm..I think if I were to get grey hair in my 40's or 50's I'd want to keep my hair natural, but who knows, honestly. I just hope I'd get a nice shade of grey or white :).

[spigette]

I am forty and starting to notice more and more greys over the last year. My hair has always had a lot of copper and blonde in it, so the grey never really stood out before, but now I see a few silver threads on just about every part of my head.

I used to dye my hair but stopped about 6 years ago, and my hair is pretty much virgin now. I have always felt that going grey naturally was elegant and beautiful, and I always hoped mine would go bright shiny silver like my mother's has (I hope it does!). I especially love seeing long silver hair.

And yet.... I think as I am getting older, and as I spend more time here on LHC, I am realizing how deeply vain I am about my hair. I love my natural brown colour, and I love the attention my hair gets. I am not a beauty by any stretch of the imagination - I am overweight and I have acne scars on my face. But I have nice eyes, and I have beautiful hair. And I worry about how much older grey will make me look. Part of me wants to dye. :(

But then, I would HATE the commitment of having to keep colouring, and the damage it might do to my hair, etc etc etc. I keep thinking of my great-aunt Jean who had dyed black hair with 2 inch white roots and wore white go-go boots and lipstick like a Crayola crayon. Ugh!! So, I think I will keep going down the Renegray path. :)

[tigr]

Did anyone else notice the bizarre math inherent in this bullet point?

- There are 78 million Baby Boomers in the U.S. The oldest turned 65 this year and 10,000 more will reach that milestone every year for the next 19 years
Yikes! What happens to the other 77.8 million?

[christine1989]

Those statistics sure put grey into perspective! I had no idea that 50%+ would be naturally grey. It is also surprising that 30-40 is the average age range that people start greying. It seems like people here report greying at a much younger age. I wonder if greying young is more prevalent now due to the increased stress we are put under in society. I also wonder if there are any statistics regarding hair color and greying? You would think that dark haired people would grey later since their hair already has more melanin but I'm no scientist so IDK.

Personally, I plan to dye my hair when it begins to grey- not because I don't like silvers but because I like my natural color so much that I could not let it go. Unfortunatly I'm adopted so I can't tell what my hereditary hair traits are but fortunatly I'm part Japanese so hopefully I'll get some good hair genes there and won't begin greying until late 30s :pray:

[Lilli]

To clarify: she does not like her skunk streak and dyes it. It is about 5 inches wide, right down the middle of her head from forehead to crown. I'd like to see pics of people on whom it looks good. :-) I am sure there are many here!

[Chetanlaiho]

I was just looking at some grey haired peeps the other day and realized that I would actually like having gray hair xD Dark grey or full on white (but admittedly the main reason I'd want that right now is so I could dye it crazy colours without bleaching it xD)

My sister is starting to get grey hairs at 24, after this article I'm wondering if the fact that her boyfriend smokes (in their house as well) has anything to do with that.

"The average woman spends $330 a year on coloring her hair" gray part aside, seriously?! That's a lot of money to spend on a haircolour O_o

[boomtownrat]

I was just looking at some grey haired peeps the other day and realized that I would actually like having gray hair xD Dark grey or full on white (but admittedly the main reason I'd want that right now is so I could dye it crazy colours without bleaching it xD)

My sister is starting to get grey hairs at 24, after this article I'm wondering if the fact that her boyfriend smokes (in their house as well) has anything to do with that.

"The average woman spends $330 a year on coloring her hair" gray part aside, seriously?! That's a lot of money to spend on a haircolour O_o

Unfortunately for me, I used to smoke and I was married to a smoker for over six years. That and various stressful things probably accelerated my silvering, but it was already starting long before that. It's been six and a half years since I quit, though.

I just calculated how much I was spending on my hair back when I was still getting it dyed in the salon. A single colour, done every four weeks, added up to $520 a year. (One of the reasons I stopped dyeing was the price. The biggest reason, though, was that I wanted to own and love my true hair colour.) That's pretty cheap for a salon, and I'm sure there are plenty of people who go for highlights or other multi-process dye jobs that end up costing $100 a pop or more in high-end salons. On the other end of the spectrum, I'm guessing most people spend $10 or less for a box of dye to use at home every four to six weeks. I'm not surprised it averages out to $330.

I'm gobsmacked at how much cash I was laying out on my hair for that brief time (less than two years) I was getting it dyed at the salon. When I think about it, I'm ashamed of myself. As much as I want to support my friend who does my hair, I can't justify spending that much. Now I'm spending much less and it feels good to know that.

[Sunshineliz]

My other main funk with that article is that she seems not to know the difference between life expectancy and average age of death for an adult. If life expectancy is 48 years, that does not mean that the average person dies at age 48 ... except maybe from the 1960s onwards. The reason for that being that life expectancy is an average over the whole life and takes into account the (sometimes very high) mortality rate of the under 5s. So it is complete rubbish that no one would have seen white/grey-haired women. Any woman who survived to puberty, or even age 6, would have a much greater change of reaching their 60s and 70s. See here for some very interesting numbers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_expectancy#Life_expectancy_variation_over_tim e


Thanks for that link. I always knew there had to be a better way of expressing how old people that made it to adulthood typically became.

As far as the rest of the article goes, I think her statistics are odd and she's probably terrible in her math. Her ability to spot trends are probably spot on though. I don't think most women are ready to embrace their gray, but it is becoming more acceptable. I've heard men dyeing their hair because they don't want to appear out-of-date in the job market. In this economy I can hardly blame them for wanting to do something to keep their edge. Plus I don't think they always like the age connotations either. One of my brothers with grey "wings" got asked if he was his kids' grandfather. He wasn't happy.:o But he still hasn't dyed it.:)

One thing I hate about the article is the assumption that gray is old and women with gray have lost their fertility. Excuse me? I was 20 when I started graying and have had four kids since then. Gray means your hair has lost it's melanin and doesn't have anything to do with female parts! (Of course that is my own pet peeve--the assumption that gray hair automatically means late 40s and 50s when menopause can start.)

Besides, as others have said, in older women gray can also mean wisdom and experience, someone the younger generation of women can turn to for direction--NOT old and useless.


To clarify: she does not like her skunk streak and dyes it. It is about 5 inches wide, right down the middle of her head from forehead to crown. I'd like to see pics of people on whom it looks good. :-) I am sure there are many here!

Well mine isn't exactly in the middle of my head, but the brownest streak is! I suppose that DOES make me rather skunky! I'm pretty young for so much gray hair, but I decided to embrace it anyway and be as natural as possible. (Besides I hate the idea of dyeing, even with natural dyes--although I almost did it when I was feeling more negative toward my silver hair several months ago. I've done a 180 since then.) If you're really interested in seeing stripey pics, you're welcome to look in my album.:) Whether it looks good or not is a matter of opinion.

[blackhound]

I find that people either love or dislike my hair. I think it's not so much that I've let my hair go silver, but that I've let my hair go silver AND it's long. It's the combination that gets the conversations started. *g*

I started going silver in my 20's and I dyed it out until I hit my 40's. Then I let it go all natural.

[TrudieCat]

50% of people would be gray? Wow! I can't imagine! You know, I think it would be so cool if everyone just let themselves hair their own natural hair color, like a "Don't Color For A Year" challenge or something. What would people look like? How would it affect how we see hair color? Would we appreciate the range of hair colors more? It's interesting how in classical literature there are so many different words for all the colors of hair: sable, flaxen, chocolate, jet, wheat, honey, auburn, gold, silver, white, salt and pepper, orange, firey, strawberry blond, etc etc. And now what colors for hair do we have? Black, brown, blond, gray, red. Sometimes there's dark brown and dirty blond but by and large we have 5 names now. It's kind of sad.

I like this point a lot. :flower: All of those beautiful descriptions of the subtle color variations that are part of nature, so poetic. :)

It's especially interesting to me that with the current color delineations you've described (black, brown, red, etc) there is no sense of color continuity or mixture of tones. For example, my father's family had hair that was somewhere between black and brown - hard to describe by the current, standard categories, much easier to describe using the more poetic descriptors you mentioned here - sort of like the darkest dark chocolate.

My own hair is somewhere between blonde and brown and I've been told more times than I can count to push it lighter so that it looks like it's blonde blonde. But I like that it's an in-between color, full of subtle variation, like a puma's coat. :)

[Chetanlaiho]

Unfortunately for me, I used to smoke and I was married to a smoker for over six years. That and various stressful things probably accelerated my silvering, but it was already starting long before that. It's been six and a half years since I quit, though.

I just calculated how much I was spending on my hair back when I was still getting it dyed in the salon. A single colour, done every four weeks, added up to $520 a year. (One of the reasons I stopped dyeing was the price. The biggest reason, though, was that I wanted to own and love my true hair colour.) That's pretty cheap for a salon, and I'm sure there are plenty of people who go for highlights or other multi-process dye jobs that end up costing $100 a pop or more in high-end salons. On the other end of the spectrum, I'm guessing most people spend $10 or less for a box of dye to use at home every four to six weeks. I'm not surprised it averages out to $330.

I'm gobsmacked at how much cash I was laying out on my hair for that brief time (less than two years) I was getting it dyed at the salon. When I think about it, I'm ashamed of myself. As much as I want to support my friend who does my hair, I can't justify spending that much. Now I'm spending much less and it feels good to know that.

Yea I guess for someone who only ever did a demi permanent dye once and lowlights twice, that sounds like a looot of money xD I know one girl who switches hair colour about every month or two so I wouldn't be suprised if she matched that amount but other than that I don't know anyone who colours their hair enough for it to cost thát much O_o

[agoddess2die4]

Those statistics sure put grey into perspective! I had no idea that 50%+ would be naturally grey. It is also surprising that 30-40 is the average age range that people start greying. It seems like people here report greying at a much younger age. I wonder if greying young is more prevalent now due to the increased stress we are put under in society. I also wonder if there are any statistics regarding hair color and greying? You would think that dark haired people would grey later since their hair already has more melanin but I'm no scientist so IDK.

Maybe it's because some don't consider themselves as graying until they have a significant amount of gray? For example, I have a sprinkling of gray and it's difficult to riffle through my hair without finding any, but it's not readily visible until someone is close and looking for them (or when I get the occasional crazy one that sticks out of my head) so, while I have grays (probably a few dozen), I don't really consider myself as going gray yet because it's not actually a significant amount. Hell, I had someone spot one when I was in sixth grade. ahahaha

[Jimothea]

Although this article was...interesting...it was very poorly written. I find it hard to swallow the author has a Ph.D and writes in such a lackidazical, skewed manner.

Anyway, I do think there may be a subtle shift towards the whole "gray is great" kind of thinking for women....however, as commercial hair dyes have only been resonably available to the public for, say, sixty or so years, I don't think this is very noteworthy.

For literally thousands of years hair maintenance was not concerned--at least for the majority of the world population--with color, but with practicality and/or quality and design. Yes, there have long been natural options for those wishing to get rid of grays and whites, but these options were not adopted into a routine by the majority of the population.

I would go so far as to say it is only very recently that going gray has even entered into the equation of self-worth, and as such could be treated as a beauty trend like any other. Ahem--just a trend. Not much more. Give it another fifty years or so, and some complete other view will be rampant. Heck, give it ten. Or five.

On a personal note, I think for some (men AND women alike), grays/white is more flattering than their younger-aged hair. For many skin tones and eye colors, I find gray/white to be more suitable and age-appropriate, even for the "premature" grays, than the obviously-dyed-youthful look; often it seems too harsh, or even more aging. In fact, for those who gray in, say, their teens or twenties, I find dying over it to be REALLY aging, by a decade even. Trying too hard, that kind of thing. Am I alone in this?

[Caldonia Sun]

Just one more in a sea of opinions.

In this area, older women are starting to let their silver show more, but they usually have short cuts. I never see a younger woman who is embracing her natural silver. There are a few of us longhairs, but even fewer that are obviously taking good care of it. I don't regularly see any silver longhairs, but occasionally one will pop up at the grocery store. Oh, and at the dog shows - they are usually a free-spirited bunch.

I colored for almost 15 years, until my scalp rebeled. I still have issues with it and believe the chemicals did permanent damage.

Sometimes I feel quite conspicuous and sometimes I think I am being judged by other women as an oddball. But I also get quite a few compliments. If someone doesn't feel I'm worth getting to know because I don't dump toxic chemicals on my head to look younger, then screw them; they're not someone I would want to associate with.

[Caldonia Sun]

On a personal note, I think for some (men AND women alike), grays/white is more flattering than their younger-aged hair. For many skin tones and eye colors, I find gray/white to be more suitable and age-appropriate, even for the "premature" grays, than the obviously-dyed-youthful look; often it seems too harsh, or even more aging. In fact, for those who gray in, say, their teens or twenties, I find dying over it to be REALLY aging, by a decade even. Trying too hard, that kind of thing. Am I alone in this?

Nope, you're not alone. Who are they fooling?

[wendyg]

curlymarcia: I'm not in my 70s.

You could also look up Emmylou Harris (who started going grey in her early 30s) and the writer Susanna Clarke (ditto).

wg

[88Marisa]

I really want to be rocking the long white hair look some day, although it'll be a long time until my hair has enough white hairs for that (although all of my "greys" are actually white hairs, which I like).

I am growing out virgin hair (a small amount of "grey" was part of my motivation for dyeing to begin with), so I will be rocking the color I got, white hairs and all.

[Maverick494]

My dad has had white hair for as long as I can remember. He started going grey at age 18 and in his mid twenties his whole head of blonde hair had transformed into a mixture of silver and white. In his 30's he got solid white and has always been from that age on. He stands out that way, I can always see him coming from miles away that white head of hair standing out like an exclamation point.

At 23, I don't have any greys yet, which is surprising to me because both my parents got theirs at an early age. That said, if I'm going grey, I'd want to have it happen quickly. I don't want to be stuck with some grey parts here and there because I don't like the sight of silver mixed with brown unevenly.

I think this is a problem for most women. I think a lot less people would mind going grey if it would be consistent. A whole head of silvers and whites looks awesome. A head where the silver has blended evenly with the natural haircolour also looks good. A head with about 3/4 different colors at different places...not so much. Well, in my opinion anyway.

[IanB]

I think it's easier for us guys to be grey, it's called "sophisticated" and other such rubbish remarks. But it's anno domini, nature, genetics, the ageing process, so embrace and enjoy it.

[rags]

Well, I love my skunk stripe. And if others don't like it, I don't really care! I've had it since I was 25, it's a part of me. I do think there's a double standard for women vs. men though. And though it is slowly becoming more acceptable for women not to dye their hair, it's not happening (at least in my area) anytime soon.

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=8093&pictureid=105670

[Merewen]

I think location has a lot to do with how comfortable people are with graying as well. Where I am, it's not hard at all to spot women with lovely cared-for white/silver hair of shoulder length or even longer (or at least longish bobs). Many of them are quite stunning, actually.

[ktani]

It is a personal choice whether to cover grey hair and it can be economically driven too in terms of one competing in the job market.

There certainly is no longer a double standard these days, as many men dye their hair. They just do not admit it as easily as women do, in my experience.

[ktani]

I like this point a lot. :flower: All of those beautiful descriptions of the subtle color variations that are part of nature, so poetic. :)

It's especially interesting to me that with the current color delineations you've described (black, brown, red, etc) there is no sense of color continuity or mixture of tones. For example, my father's family had hair that was somewhere between black and brown - hard to describe by the current, standard categories, much easier to describe using the more poetic descriptors you mentioned here - sort of like the darkest dark chocolate.

My own hair is somewhere between blonde and brown and I've been told more times than I can count to push it lighter so that it looks like it's blonde blonde. But I like that it's an in-between color, full of subtle variation, like a puma's coat. :)

On some hair colour charts the poetry is not completely lost, lol,
http://www.haircolor-tips.com/hair-color-chart-36.html

This explains variations well, I think.
http://www.hairfad.com/hair-color-chart.html

[BlazingHeart]

The article writing definitely stinks. For example, when she mentioned that our 'founding fathers' wore white wigs, she didn't bother mentioning that it was the fashion for ALL people who could afford it to wear white wigs, and if they couldn't afford it to powder their hair white.

My mother was a bit upset when she got her first silver streak - not enough to dye her hair, but enough that she moved her part so that the silver wasn't right on her part and super-obvious. But when she started getting it sprinkled everywhere in her 40s she accepted it, in part because it made it clear that she wasn't dying her hair like everyone assumed. At 52, she's still I'd say in the range of 95%+ red, with just a sprinkling of silver.

My dad didn't silver all that young, but his beard went a lot faster than his hair. He's probably 40% silver in his beard and 10% silver in his hair.

I hope I take after them rather than some of their siblings - both have a sibling who went completely silver before 40. I figure I'm most likely to take after my mother's coloring, as my hair color is closer to hers than anyone else in the family.

I have a handful of white hairs, but because I have so much variety in color in my hair, they look white-blonde rather than age-white. I've got mostly chestnut hair, but I go down to a deep auburn at my nape and up to pale blond on my canopy, so I think almost anything would blend in until there was a lot of it. So far my white hairs are mostly in my canopy, which is part of why they blend in - who knows what it will look like when they show up elsewhere? I guess I'll get 'obvious' then.

~Blaze