Smoke and hair?

[Chetanlaiho]

First post, hey y'all ^^

I have a relatively quick question but I'm not sure how to phrase it ^^; the last couple of weeks I've been spending the weekends with a guy I've recently been seeing and staying over at his place. I care for my hair quite obsessively when I'm home but since I don't want to do that over there, I braid it to keep it from tangling and try to avoid any mechanical damage.

But no matter what I do in advance, my hair is horribly dry and tangled when I get back home. Even with French or Dutch braids it still tangles, but it is at least kept to a minimum. The length however, feels like straw. Even when I used to leave chlorine in my hair for nearly a week, it didn't feel this bad.

My routine is listed in my profile but it basically comes down to CO, weekly treatments of either oil, SMT or protein and wearing it up pretty much always. I've chemically dyed once, and have done lowlights twice, but other than that I don't feel like my hair is really damaged.

Now the only thing I can think of that could be drying my hair out this bad, is the fact that there's an awful lot of cigarette smoke in his place. Could it be that that is what's making my hair feel so awful? Thanks in advance for any help you guys can give me, I love this forum and have learned so much from just lurking and browsing for a couple of months ^_^

[Coan-Teen]

Whenever I go over a friend's home, my hair is always dry and tangly. I'm positive it is her cigarette smoke. Can you do a leave-in or a protective oiling before going over? The leave in always helps me.

[telegraph64]

I'm one of the smokiest people in the neighborhood (oh poo on quitting... don't rub it in please, I've tried... I smoke a pack less per day than I used to... gotta start easy now)... and my hair does get dry if I don't have it up and or oiled which I always always do, it's easy to prevent the smoke-dry feeling !! Just add oil, and bun/braid. All set. :):)

[Elysium]

Both myself and the BF are smokers, we don't smoke inside though. Try asking nicely if he minds smoking on the balcony or something? Or oil your hair, bun it and maybe wear a headscarf to keep the worst of the nasties off it? :D

[Chetanlaiho]

Thanks for the replies everyone! ^^

I do always wear a bit of coconut oil in my hair, and if I'm braiding it anyway I may as well do it a little heavier and see if it works ^_^ (I didn't before because I want my hair to look nice, not greasy, but if I'm restraining it anyway xD)

I'll look into head scarves, need to find a silk one for sleeping anyways, thanks for the suggestion Elysium ^^ I think I may step outside when he's actually smoking (I really don't want to ask him to smoke outside in his own appartment ^^;) but the room seems pretty heavy with smoke even if he isn't actually smoking at the time :/

Good to know it's probably the smoke and not something else I'm doing wrong, I'll definitely try all of these out and cross my fingers for it to help ^_^

[Firefox7275]

Smoke is drying on the skin and hair, and secondhand smoke is at least as hazardous to health as the cigarette is for the smoker. If your new guy has smoked in the house for a period of time it will have permeated everything from the walls to the mattress, so one or other of you going outside will not resolve the issue. :( Research has proven smoke on a parent's clothing is harmful to young children - even when they smoke outside exclusively - so being in that flat is not healthy. Could you meet up at your place or somewhere neutral?

[faerielady]

Please, let us not devolve into talking about the health aspects of smoking. That's not the question that was asked.

As a previous smoker, I can tell you that I had to oil/protect my hair more than I have to do now. I haven't had a cigarette in 10 months and my hair isn't nearly as dry and doesn't require nearly as much in the way of protective oiling.

[Firefox7275]

Please, let us not devolve into talking about the health aspects of smoking. That's not the question that was asked.


I'm sorry if I have offended. :o Perhaps for fear of being too blunt I have been too vague: you cannot separate the health aspect from the hair aspect, the level of smoke she refers to will affect the OP's hair from the inside out, via oxygen carrying capacity of the blood, peripheral circulation and use of antioxidants to fight free radicals. :shrug: There is no judgment or preaching since many of my friends and most of my ex's smoke, each to their own.

[caiti42]

Please, let us not devolve into talking about the health aspects of smoking. That's not the question that was asked.

As a previous smoker, I can tell you that I had to oil/protect my hair more than I have to do now. I haven't had a cigarette in 10 months and my hair isn't nearly as dry and doesn't require nearly as much in the way of protective oiling.

I completely agree with this since quitting smoking 6 months ago (yea for me!) my hair and skin have become so much healthier, smoother and more nourished looking.

Perhaps deeeeeeep oiling and treatments when your there. If he smokes inside though you will probably find it's in all the bedding and lounges and anything you put your head on :(

[Chetanlaiho]

Oiling definitely seems like my best bet, and the headscarf is looking like a better and better idea as well because I had not considered that the smoke would get in bedding and such as well.

Neither had I considered that the smoke may affect my hair from inside out, so although I did not ask about the health aspects of smoking I'm glad it was brought up. The level of smoke is quite bad (there's a notable difference between the air in the the hallway and in his room) so perhaps we could both do with a bit more fresh air :)

[RitaPG]

I used to smoke too, I remember how my hair felt (and smelled) back then :puke:
Give your hair a good coat of conditioner before you braid and/or bun. I find this helps a lot when I'm around smoke or dust. By the end of the day all I have to do is rinse it out. I may or may not CO wash the length (not the scalp) if it still smells of something unpleasant or feels too dry.

[spidermom]

Perhaps put a fan in the window to exhaust smoke out.

I don't understand how discussing the health aspects of smoking "devolves" the discussion. Health and beauty go hand in hand, always.

[Deelight]

I went camping this weekend and couldn't understand why my hair was so dried out when I came home when I kept it in a protective hairstyle the whole time (pigtails). Now I'm thinking it might have been that I was around a smoky campfire so much. Something to think about for the next camping trip!

[Chetanlaiho]

Thanks for the tip RitaPG :)

I have a few things I can try now to battle the dryness, but what's now worrying me is if the smoke is actually damaging, or just temporarily drying? I can deal with the dryness, a little bit of conditioner + water rinse ussually fixes that for me, but I really don't want to damage my hair, it's thin enough as it is :/

[RitaPG]

I honestly don't know how to answer this from a scientific point of view.
So I'll just blurt my mind out a bit.
For how long are you being exposed to the smoke? I mean, if you're just hanging out once a week or so, I wouldn't worry too much about it, but if you're being exposed to smoke the whole day (or more than one day) I'd be worried about my whole body, not just the hair.
One one hand, you are staying over at his place, so I suppose it would be rude to tell them all to go smoke outside :o I'm very intolerant to smoke myself, so I usually have to either sit by a window or leave the room they're in. I just get nauseated from it.
Maybe you can bun your braid and cover it with a scarf? Or ask them if it's okay for you to open the windows when they smoke?

[Chetanlaiho]

I only go once a week but I usually stay for at least a day, sometimes two, would that already be enough to have to start worrying?

Haha yes that is exactly the point xD there's ussually a window or a door open though so that helps. I have a breathing condition and partly due to that I very quickly feel unwell if there's not enough oxygen in the air (I'm not a scientist so I'm not sure if I'm describing it correctly, but for example stuffy old rooms or rooms with too many people and no open windows = lightheadedness for me) and I just realized that may have been going on when I'm over there as well :/

I'll definitely stick with oiled braids for now on, bunned if possible and I'm going hunting for a scarf this week, I really hope it works ^_^

Edit: Also slightly offtopic, are you also on the LJ community? I was browsing your blog (I only just got access to member profiles so it's all still new and shiny xD) and I think I recognize the purple hair pictures from LJ :) (which were awesome btw)

[RitaPG]

Well if you have a breathing ailment, you should worry about it. Being exposed to the smoke is enough to damage your health, and that might show up on your hair sooner or later. If it's not good for the body, it's not good for the hair.
But seriously, the dryness itself is enough to cause damage.

Yea I'm in there too. I need to update there, though, my internet was crappy last week and I couldn't open LJ. Thanks for reminding me! ^^'

[Firefox7275]

I only go once a week but I usually stay for at least a day, sometimes two, would that already be enough to have to start worrying?


According to the US Surgeon General "there is no risk free level of exposure" (http://www.surgeongeneral.gov/library/secondhandsmoke/index.html). :( Click on the fact sheets if you don't fancy reading the whole 2006 report! Bear in mind third-hand smoke (http://www.no-smoke.org/learnmore.php?id=671) is invisible. Worrying is not healthy - you and your friend care about one another's wellbeing so I am sure you can find a solution together. :)

[Kherome]

I only go once a week but I usually stay for at least a day, sometimes two, would that already be enough to have to start worrying?

Haha yes that is exactly the point xD there's ussually a window or a door open though so that helps. I have a breathing condition and partly due to that I very quickly feel unwell if there's not enough oxygen in the air (I'm not a scientist so I'm not sure if I'm describing it correctly, but for example stuffy old rooms or rooms with too many people and no open windows = lightheadedness for me) and I just realized that may have been going on when I'm over there as well :/


ANY exposure to smoke is enough to start worrying. If you can SMELL it on someone you're being exposed to dangerous cancer causing chemicals.
It's always been my personal rule to never date or hang with smokers. My first reason, of course, is my own personal health. My second reason is why would I want to risk falling in love with a person who is deliberately damaging their health and incidentally mine? That just sets me up for heartache when I have to watch their health decline:( My DH had smoked for about a year when I met him. I was unaware of his smoking status until we had dated for 3 weeks. I told him then and there that I liked him but wouldn't be seeing him again. When he realized I was serious he quit. It wasn't easy for him, but he did, and he says it's one of the best things he ever did for himself.

So don't think only of how it's drying your hair out, think of what it's doing to you on the inside. Take care of yourself!:)

[dinnee]

I don't know if you sleep over at this person's house, but it might also be the bed linnen that are drying out your hair.

I spend a lot of time in different places and always take a silk scarf with me. I tie it around the pillow as it won't stay put on my head. :)

[talecon]

I'm a smoker as well but this past week I've said bubbye to regular cigarettes and hello to e-cigarettes - less stinky ;)

[bettylibertine]

I'm a smoker and I've never noticed my hair drying out from it. Maybe I'm just used to it lol..

[Audrey Horne]

I used to be a heavy smoker but it's hard to say if my hair changed since I gave up cigs because I changed a lot of other things too, like my diet, for example. My skin didn't change or at least I don't see it. My DH smokes and I can't say my hair is dry because of it...
Moisture and oils always help, though :-)

[Chetanlaiho]

Well if you have a breathing ailment, you should worry about it. Being exposed to the smoke is enough to damage your health, and that might show up on your hair sooner or later. If it's not good for the body, it's not good for the hair.
But seriously, the dryness itself is enough to cause damage.

Yea I'm in there too. I need to update there, though, my internet was crappy last week and I couldn't open LJ. Thanks for reminding me! ^^'

It's not so much of an ailment as it is a disorder, I breathe too quickly and too shallow, which in this case, may be a good thing xD

Firefox: I'd never heard of thirdhand smoke before, it definitely sounds like what's going on in his room so that's another thing to consider :/ (and something to warn my sister about since she lives with a pretty heavy smoker).

Kherome: Wow that was an amazing commitment of your husband :) I've asked the guy in question if he would stop smoking if he could out of curiosity, but he has no plans to stop smoking until he gets married :/ thank you for your help and I'll definitely look into ways of protecting both my hair and my health :)

Dinnee: yes that was something I started to consider after reading about the smoke getting into the bed linnen as well, I was considering getting a silk scarf anyway so I'll bring that with me :) if I can figure out how to keep it around my hair than I won't have to worry about tossing and turning and lying on my hair either xD but won't the smoke eventually get in the scarf as well?

Audrey Horne: I think it's probably the smoke, since I just realized that whenever my hair gets like this, it's always after being exposed to smoke (well to rooms where a lot of people smoke), but some extra oil can't hurt ^_^

[shrimp]

My other half smokes and whenever I come back from his flat my hair is dry and tangley whilst simultaneously looking like it is desperate for a wash.

This is the case still even though he no longer smokes in the flat (he goes to a car park a few minutes walk from it so no smoke is drifting in, he'e been doing this for quite a while too) and we keep the windows open all the time.

I keep a bottle of spray detangler at his but I always forget to use it (I planned to spray on beofre braiding for bed) and just make sure I pamper my hair when I get home.

[RitaPG]

Kherome: Wow that was an amazing commitment of your husband :) I've asked the guy in question if he would stop smoking if he could out of curiosity, but he has no plans to stop smoking until he gets married :/ thank you for your help and I'll definitely look into ways of protecting both my hair and my health :)

Your friend is making a rather silly excuse, considering many people wouldn't even date a smoker, let along marry one.



It's always been my personal rule to never date or hang with smokers.
After I quit smoking I started doing the same, but it wasn't a conscious decision. I had a friend that I was rather fond of, but his smoking was a major turn off... I just can't stand the smell, it makes me nauseated :puke:

[Audrey Horne]

Audrey Horne: I think it's probably the smoke, since I just realized that whenever my hair gets like this, it's always after being exposed to smoke (well to rooms where a lot of people smoke), but some extra oil can't hurt ^_^

I hated those smoky rooms even when I was a smoker. Just ask your guy not to smoke too close to you ;-) yeah, and open windows. I also heard if you put little cups of vinegar in the room it should elliminate some of the smoke. I don't know if it's true.

[Chetanlaiho]

Your friend is making a rather silly excuse, considering many people wouldn't even date a smoker, let along marry one.

I don't think he really sees it as an excuse, more just a plan. It still sounds a bit silly but if that's what he wants to do than that's what he'll do.


My other half smokes and whenever I come back from his flat my hair is dry and tangley whilst simultaneously looking like it is desperate for a wash.

This is the case still even though he no longer smokes in the flat (he goes to a car park a few minutes walk from it so no smoke is drifting in, he'e been doing this for quite a while too) and we keep the windows open all the time.

I keep a bottle of spray detangler at his but I always forget to use it (I planned to spray on beofre braiding for bed) and just make sure I pamper my hair when I get home.
I noticed the desperate for a wash part too, I was wondering why that was happening (I wash it the night before I go, may have to switch it to after I get back).

Maybe the smoke is still in the walls and ceilings and furniture, and that's why your hair still gets the nasty side effects?

I'll try to find a good detangler too, but I've yet to see a cone-free one (and after quitting cones, I get more tangles than I used to).


I hated those smoky rooms even when I was a smoker. Just ask your guy not to smoke too close to you ;-) yeah, and open windows. I also heard if you put little cups of vinegar in the room it should elliminate some of the smoke. I don't know if it's true.
I don't think he even notices the smoke, he's too used to it I suppose xD but I'll try the first bit and I'll suggest the second part, thanks a lot ^_^

[Firefox7275]

Kherome: Wow that was an amazing commitment of your husband :) I've asked the guy in question if he would stop smoking if he could out of curiosity, but he has no plans to stop smoking until he gets married :/ thank you for your help and I'll definitely look into ways of protecting both my hair and my health :)

... I don't think he really sees it as an excuse, more just a plan. It still sounds a bit silly but if that's what he wants to do than that's what he'll do.

A medical professional will tell you that is a defensive/ deflective excuse, probably because he will be accustomed to people telling him to quit or asking when he plans to (subtext: you should quit). Saying he will quit halts the discussion in it's tracks quicker than saying he is not going to stop smoking. It's a smart thing to say to a new partner, because you asking when he will quit now equates to asking when he will marry you. Addicts who are serious about quitting do make specific and detailed plans, and they do set a quit date but it is not an unspecified date many years from now. :confused: Some find it helpful to think about how they'd think or feel if their loved one (or they themselves) were a junkie or alcoholic who plans to stop 'one day'.

I trained as an NHS stop smoking advisor although I haven't offered sessions in a few years so I've forgotten as much as I remember! :o There is an incredible amount of research on the psychology of addiction - which smokers are hardened and which are stuck in a cycle of failed quits, what motivates people to quit, why some quit attempts are successful but most fail, why health scares or diagnoses are not motivating enough. If you are serious about this guy read up on health behaviour change, motivational interviewing, the stages or cycle of change. Although this is is applied to many unhealthy or addictive behaviours, much of the initial work came from smoking cessation.

I would be asking myself what happens if he doesn't quit after you get engaged, hasn't quit by your wedding day, will you end the relationship? What about when you are thinking of starting a family, fall pregnant unexpectedly? What if the years of heavy smoking have affected his fertility, or he quits but falls ill when you have three children under five? These are questions for you not him, as pushing the health message does not work (although inability to get or maintain an erection occasionally hits the spot ;) ).



I noticed the desperate for a wash part too, I was wondering why that was happening (I wash it the night before I go, may have to switch it to after I get back).

I don't think he even notices the smoke, he's too used to it I suppose xD but I'll try the first bit and I'll suggest the second part, thanks a lot ^_^

Nicotine residue is greasy, to get a layer off paintwork you need to scrub with sugar soap which is a very strong surfactant (far stronger than even concentrated washing up liquid). :( It can also permanently stain skin, nails and hair tho it probably won't whilst you are only visiting. You may find oiling your hair absorbs more of the residue, just as CO-washing is the best way to remove oil treatments from hair. Vinegar will not have any impact on the health risks even if it improves the smell: a large part of the fumes are invisible and many toxic chemicals do not smell at all.

ETA: Sorry for the lengthy post, forgot I clicked through to 'Mane Forum' and not still in 'Health & Body Beautiful'! :p

[Audrey Horne]

Firefox, what if there was no motivation to quit and you just quit and never smoke again?) Jeez, I'd hate to be called an addict haha

[RitaPG]

I don't think he really sees it as an excuse, more just a plan. It still sounds a bit silly but if that's what he wants to do than that's what he'll do.

"no plans to stop smoking until he gets married" is not a plan, it's an excuse disguised as a plan. Trust me, I was a heavy smoker for years, I've said all sorts of sh*t to have people out of my way. He knows exactly what he's saying lol

[mistik]

I do know that when I use water elsewhere I sometimes experience dryness in my hair. If the water is treated differently it can also affect your hair.

[Firefox7275]

Firefox, what if there was no motivation to quit and you just quit and never smoke again?) Jeez, I'd hate to be called an addict haha

Why would you quit if there was no motivation? Quitting involves a series of active choices, it's not simply a passive thing because someone will always proffer a box. Successful quitters (oxymoron :p) have more motivation to stop smoking than to continue smoking, motivational interviewing helps addicts verbalise those reasons. Refuses to be labelled an addict is motivation enough for some, feeling nauseous whilst pregnant or winning a wager is enough for others.

[Audrey Horne]

Why would you quit if there was no motivation? Quitting involves a series of active choices, it's not simply a passive thing because someone will always proffer a box. Successful quitters (oxymoron :p) have more motivation to stop smoking than to continue smoking, motivational interviewing helps addicts verbalise those reasons. Refuses to be labelled an addict is motivation enough for some, feeling nauseous whilst pregnant or winning a wager is enough for others.
That's how I gave it up. I just woke up one morning, inhaled and didn't get my kick anymore.
All these reasons to quit like heath, beauty whatever don't help everyone to quit. Forcing and convincing someone to quit doesn't help either. My DH smokes and of course, I want him to stop. But by rubing it in and preaching what to do I won't encourage him to give up. I hope he makes this decision someday by himself. I hated to be 'motivated' by others to quit...

Anyway I don't want to go off topic anymore with smoking-thing :-) Let's come back to hair)

[Firefox7275]

That's how I gave it up. I just woke up one morning, inhaled and didn't get my kick anymore.
All these reasons to quit like heath, beauty whatever don't help everyone to quit. Forcing and convincing someone to quit doesn't help either. My DH smokes and of course, I want him to stop. But by rubing it in and preaching what to do I won't encourage him to give up. I hope he makes this decision someday by himself. I hated to be 'motivated' by others to quit...


We agree: my health comments were not aimed at a smoker. :shrug:



I trained as an NHS stop smoking advisor although I haven't offered sessions in a few years so I've forgotten as much as I remember! :o There is an incredible amount of research on the psychology of addiction - which smokers are hardened and which are stuck in a cycle of failed quits, what motivates people to quit, why some quit attempts are successful but most fail, why health scares or diagnoses are not motivating enough. If you are serious about this guy read up on health behaviour change, motivational interviewing, the stages or cycle of change. Although this is is applied to many unhealthy or addictive behaviours, much of the initial work came from smoking cessation.

I would be asking myself what happens if he doesn't quit after you get engaged, hasn't quit by your wedding day, will you end the relationship? What about when you are thinking of starting a family, fall pregnant unexpectedly? What if the years of heavy smoking have affected his fertility, or he quits but falls ill when you have three children under five? These are questions for you not him, as pushing the health message does not work (although inability to get or maintain an erection occasionally hits the spot ;) ).

[Chetanlaiho]

Firefox: thanks for sharing your expertise, it's really helpful! It took me a while to reply because I had to read it a couple of times for it all to sink in ^^;

I suppose that 'when I marry' plan is rather deflective now that I think about it. If we really do get serious the smoking is definitely something I have to consider (for now, I don't see myself getting married or having children in the next ten years, if at all) but even just for my general health until then it's still something I have to think about.


You may find oiling your hair absorbs more of the residue, just as CO-washing is the best way to remove oil treatments from hair.
So oiling my hair in advance may only make it worse? (Sorry I'm not sure I get the part about CO ^^;)

Mistik: I haven't used the water there on my hair directly, so I don't think that's it, but thanks for contributing :)

[Chetanlaiho]

Hey, just wanted to let you know that this week I oiled my hair more heavily than before and kept it under a hat most of the time and it was definitely less dry and tangle-y than before, still not perfect but at least I'm on the right path =) (and keeping windows open helped a lot too xD)