My DBF wants me to highlight my hair [Archive] - The Long Hair Community Discussion Boards

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Valdeon

May 6th, 2011, 01:11 AM

owlathena

May 6th, 2011, 01:18 AM

Belisarius

May 6th, 2011, 01:22 AM

I wouldn't do it. But then I wouldn't ask for it, if my gf had hair such as that.

Valdeon

May 6th, 2011, 01:27 AM

Oh, thank you, owlathena. He just has this thing for highlights, I don't know. He also likes pitch black but he knows that there is no way I ever dye it black.
He was just a bit upset when I said that he is not going to see highlights on me anymore, almost as upset as when I told him I cut my hair to APL (a while ago).
The real catch is that for the color he wants I need to lighten my hair only 1/4 of a tone, so there will be no visible damage and I know how to do it at home. Grrrr...

Belisarius, thank you :)

Chibbylick

May 6th, 2011, 01:35 AM

sounds like he is being very picky! Also sounds like over summer you are likely to get natural highlights just from the sunshine...

rhosyn_du

May 6th, 2011, 01:47 AM

I like your color as-is, but I think in the long run, what matters is what makes you happy. The way you feel about your hair is far more important than how your boyfriend or I or anyone here feels about it.

If you do decide to lighten, maybe consider honey lightening? I haven't tried it myself, but I know several people around here swear by it, and it's purportedly non-damaging and should be enough to lighten just 1/4 tone.

Avital88

May 6th, 2011, 02:00 AM

I understand what he is liking, just really light blond.the color is nice but i like you hair better now,it looks healthy and alive:) as far hair can be alive..
I second the thought that your hair might get lighter during summer,especially if you go to the beach and things like that..
Dont bleach it! it will destroy your gorgeous locks.. have you tried chamille lighting or honey lightning? and ofcourse lemon,but thats a bit drying but not as bad as bleach! my mom used to put lemonjuice in my hair when i was 5 and it made my hair really light during our summers in France.

Avital88

May 6th, 2011, 02:03 AM

Or if you really want to lighten it ,spray some 'sun in' on your brush or comb and it will lighten alot in the sun. you are already really light so you dont need much of it.Good luck!

Yozhik

May 6th, 2011, 02:44 AM

Valdeon, your hair is gorgeous! :thud:

Honestly, I can barely see the difference between your highlighted hair and your hair color now. (P.S. I especially like your first and second photos with your natural color).
Truly, it's to die for, and I'm sure a lot of people try to achieve the color you have naturally.

In your situation, I wouldn't highlight my hair, however, you decide what is best for you. I don't know anything about bleach, but how damaging would it be to use it to lift your color to get to that highlighted shade? That's what would be a priority in my mind to find out.

Good luck with whatever decision you make, and remember that your hair should please yourself first and foremost, and not anyone else. :)

vanity_acefake

May 6th, 2011, 03:04 AM

Your natural hair colour is gorgeous. Looks like it is naturally highlighted.
As others have posted it will probably lighten in the summer too.
Stick with your natural colour. You have been so patient growing it out.

tigereye

May 6th, 2011, 03:13 AM

If you do decide to lighten, maybe consider honey lightening? I haven't tried it myself, but I know several people around here swear by it, and it's purportedly non-damaging and should be enough to lighten just 1/4 tone.
Agreed! Try more natural methods first if you do decide to lighten. It can't hurt to try them out.
Either way just be sure you really want to lighten it.
And the others are right, the sun will probably highlight it.

Quixii

May 6th, 2011, 03:18 AM

I actually really, really like your hair colour.

I hope your boyfriend accepts whatever choice you make about your hair. From what I've heard, people who try to make you change, even just little parts of yourself like adding highlights, aren't good news. :shrug:

Phexlyn

May 6th, 2011, 03:52 AM

So yesterday we had a chat with my DBF about different hair colors in general and on me specifically, and he said that he likes highlights in my hair the best. He didn't try to force me into dyeing my hair or anything but nonetheless now I feel quite discouraged because I've being trying to grow out my natural color for almost 2 years. He also showed me the color that he'd like on me as well, and now I am all confused. I want my hair long and healthy and I like my natural color, but it is really quite light and it is very easy for me to make it even lighter and more warm toned. It's just... really??? Is my natural color THAT different from what I had with highlights and what he wants? I don't know :rolleyes:

I don't want this to sound mean, but from what you wrote I feel that you were asking for trouble. Maybe the highlighted colour was what you had when you met and that's why he hit on you initially? :( I think this is not only a question of hair colour, but more of a personality-relationship thing. I understand that you want to be attractive for him, and maybe that's why you asked, but do you really want to change your looks only because of him? I know I wouldn't, except it's what I want as well.
I'm not saying you shouldn't care about what he says and likes, but you should know where to draw the line (I know it's only hair, but for me hair is something very personal and I don't let anyone mess with it). Are you unhappy with your hair currently and were looking for support when you asked him? Or was it just curiosity?
Just some thoughts to help you decide what to do, and be sure you know why you asked this, and then you'll hopefully find out how to deal with the answer you got. Have you asked him what he liked about the highlights so much and in what way your hair colour is different now? Did he say that he didn't like your natural hair or did he just like the highlights better?

My partner wouldn't dare to ask such a thing, btw, but he knows I'd get mad if he did :p And I think your hair is very beautiful either way!

Ninika

May 6th, 2011, 04:13 AM

I think your natural colour is stunningly beautiful! I would not change it and do anything damaging to it if it isn't you who really wants it.

That being said, I know how hard it is if your SO likes your hair one way and you like it the other. With me, it is the other way round, though. DH prefers my hair as it is, while I'm the one itching for a change :p.

MonaLisa

May 6th, 2011, 04:36 AM

I must say your hair looks wonderful! It's a perfect color and it looks nice and healthy!
With highlights it would look tiny bit lighter but not so natural?
I really wouldn't do it...

My DBF often stated how he wants to see me with blonde hair. I had some serious bleached highlights years back, but it wasn't enough, he meant completely bleached blonde.
Then I explained him I most likely can't have completely bleached AND long and healthy hair. Apparently he was completely unaware of this. Try explaining him what else it can do to yout hair apart from lightening it a bit.

celebriangel

May 6th, 2011, 04:50 AM

I hope you don't mind me being a little direct; hopefully it'll put things in perspective.

The question you just asked was: Should I get my hair highlighted because my BF wants me to?

I hope you can see the inherent problems in there. Other members have pointed them out, and I agree, BIG TIME. The problem is not so much what your bf likes, as how you seem to have taken it, and how he appears to have communicated it. Do please ask him to clarify whether he meant "oh, I thought it'd be a nice idea, y'know, cause you were cute with highlights, but I still love you natural!" or something more like "I think you should highlight your hair, because I prefer it that way." From the information you gave us, there's no way to tell which it is - and I don't think *you're* sure which one it is. The first is absolutely fine, cause, well, it's just a thought. The second is pretty problematic, relationship-wise. Having gone directly from a subtly controlling partner to one who is wildly happy to let me see to my own affairs with respect to hair, beauty, clothes etc as long as it makes me happy, I can tell you that the former is very distressing and bad news. But you know that already. I'm not saying your boyfriend is bad news, because this could just be a miscommunication, but please do ask.

Further point. I'm pretty sure that if you really wanted to get your hair highlighted, or were in any way enthusiastic about it, you would have turned round and said "hmm, highlights, I like those, so why not give them another go?" And gone on your merry way.

If, on the other hand, you thought it might be nice but were undecided, your post would have been similar, but with the emphasis more like "Dear LHC, I'm thinking about highlighting my hair. [photos]. It's not all that damaging because I don't lighten it much, and I kinda like it, but I'm not sure about giving up my natural look, what do y'all think? PS My BF likes it when I highlight."

See the difference? On the other hand, your post sounds outright upset that your boyfriend would suggest such a thing, and extremely conflicted about what you should now do. Which to me says "I don't want to highlight my hair, but my boyfriend wants me to! Help?"

At which point, the *only* important question is: Do I really, really want to highlight my hair? It's your hair. Unless it's your boss and you're giving yourself lime green spikes, no one else's opinion matters a whit (unless, imho, you're trying to decide between two equally awesome options. But from the tone of your post, that's really not what this situation is).

If you do, you should be excited. You should think, by gum, I can't wait to highlight my hair! But I know I should do the two week rule, so I guess I'll just have to wait.

Not how you're feeling? Well. You don't want to highlight your hair, if that's the case. Whatever you decide to do, however, please give yourself the two week rule.

I personally adore your natural colour and feel very sad whenever I see bleach blonde on top of what might have been a wonderful, natural colour. But again - my opinion about your hair shouldn't matter.

Please think about this carefully. From your post, this is more than just about whether you want to dye your hair. This is about whether you should do something just because your partner wants you to. My personal answer to this question is "only if you really want to, too." You need to find your own answer.

PS I do hope I don't come off as agressive, or rude, or anything. I just...I read so much more in your post than a question about whether or not you would look cute with highlights, and you sound distressed and conflicted, so I really felt a need to help you out on that front. If I have overstepped my bounds, I am sorry.

PPS If you do use sun-in, nightshade has a wonderful thread about how to use it slowly and safely, without damage. Please don't just use it according to the box directions, as it can fry your hair, and with years of lovely strong healthy virgin hair, frying is the last thing you want.

torrilin

May 6th, 2011, 05:49 AM

I can't tell the difference.

I doubt he can either really. And it looks to me like you might be growing out your bangs? That might actually be what he noticed.

Maddy25

May 6th, 2011, 06:15 AM

Your hair is so healthy and beautiful now! Don't risk the damage, especially since its not what YOU want. IMHO guys just like change. When I asked my BF how he liked my hair, he said he likes it however I want to have it, as long as I switch it up every once in awhile. Same thing probably goes for your guy- he just likes the highlights because they haven't been around in awhile.

I agree with this. Maybe try changing some other things, like your part or try different styles before you go ahead and highlight if you decide to. Maybe that will help :) I shouldnt talk though, my DH said he liked my hair best when it was red and I hennaed the day after haha.

vanillabones

May 6th, 2011, 06:18 AM

Oh no I love your hair, the difference is so minuscule I can't even tell. Your hair is BEAUTIFUL in the daylight I am very jealous and I'm sure lots of people are. I hope you don't put any chemicals on it :( if anything maybe try honey lightening but still... you are so beautiful naturally I wouldn't fix what isn't broken :)

HuggyBear

May 6th, 2011, 06:23 AM

I agree with PP's. You're hair is beautiful as it is and I wouldn't change it just because someone else wanted you to. But if you do want a subtle, brighter color maybe give the honey lightening treatment a try before resorting to other methods.

Fairlight63

May 6th, 2011, 06:30 AM

Your hair is absolutely beautiful now! I hope that you don't change it! Your hair is to die for!! Much prettier & healthier looking than the other pictures. I would not change it at all!

I also would NOT bring up the subject of anything about hair with him again. If he really loves you, hair color should not matter at all.

My DH would love it if I would cut my hair off to chin length & dye it but that is not what I want - so I don't bring up anything about hair with him.

free_hug

May 6th, 2011, 06:48 AM

Your hair is beautiful. Especially the color. You are a natural blonde, a very fine one at that. It is a rare thing that I think you could just appreciate as it is.

Maybe he really prefers fake blondes to naturals. For most people, bleaching blonde hair sounds just weird at the very least. (Seriously, what's the point?) Maybe he just prefers fake stuff to natural in general? That may sound strange to some, although it is a valid point of view - you cannot have absolute judgement when it comes to taste.

After all, what you do to your hair is up to you - but if we can influence you just a bit:
a) he probably won't leave you if you don't turn yout natural blonde head into a mass of bleach
b) your hair will be happier as it is now. Keep it! :)

Valdeon

May 6th, 2011, 07:03 AM

Thank you :)
First of all, thank you for all the compliments to my natural color!

Disclaimer
Second, I fully realize that it is my hair, my life and in the end my decision. If it came out to sound like "oh my gosh, my boyfriend doesn't like my hair color and i think I should dye it even though iI don't want to", I'm sorry, I didn't mean it to sound that way.
He said that he liked me with highlights the best and not so crazy about my natural color (he doesn't know how to call it even), I just said "mmm, i like my hair as it is now, so no", he pouted his lips and we moved on.
We had our ups and downs for the last 7 years, but he is not a control freak and just has this habit of changing his mind, he liked brunettes, now he is more hung up on angelic blond kind of look, the only thing that never seems to change is his dislike for my natural color

The reason why I posted this
What really stunned me is that he prefers my old highlighted hair. SO i thought maybe I've been delusional about what mother nature gave me. I was so sure that the difference in quality and in thickness is so noticeable, and these days my hair color plays so many not boring shades (like golden, pinkish, caramel undertones) that there is no way somebody would prefer my old hair. I guess I AM disappointed that for him there are only light blond, bright red, and pitch black, and all other beautiful shades are just not relevant.

A little backstory
When we first met I had my natural color, just duller and more ashy, one year later I highlighted it (he liked it), then lifted the color to full-time light blond (he wasn't too crazy about that) and after 2 years I dyed it red (first he hated it but the red grow on him eventually, but by that time I decided to go au natural).

How I feel about my color myself
As most people sometimes I like it and sometimeS I hate it. Lighter shades suit me, but my color gives me versatility, and being an old member on many hair forums, I realize that some girls are dying to have the color similar to mine (sorry if I sound snotty, it is just an observation). So I am always a bit on the fence. What really stops me is my desire to grow out really long hair and my loath for the roots showing up all the time, and there is some magic in all natural hair, at least to me. What tempts me is how easy it is to do and how highlights just do their magic brightening up the face and all. I just need a bit of a lightening spray mixed with coconut oil and voila: fast, easy, almost harmless.

So I guess in the end my DBF's comment just shattered my confidence in my pro-natural choice.

angelthadiva

May 6th, 2011, 07:38 AM

So I guess in the end my DBF's comment just shattered my confidence in my pro-natural choice.

I'm glad you said this! When will it end? Will he start complaining about your weight or perhaps your nose is too big or your chest is too small? If he likes highlights tell him to put them in his hair! Most men do not know what all goes into haircare. Adding chemicals to your hair is damaging. Granted some are less damaging, but they do have the potential to cause damage. There are some even in this forum who have serious allergic reactions to bleach and dye.

I'm transitioning now from coloring, I think I'm about 2.5 years through my change now. My outgrowth is just past my shoulders and my hair is TBL. The color is salt, pepper and paprika, but I style it in a way that makes the demarcation line undetectable. This guy who happens to be a cousin by marriage approached me last year and actually touched my hair and *suggested* this and that be done to my hair. I told him quite plainly that I quit coloring my hair over a year ago and I'm not going to be coloring my hair again :shrug: I didn't say then, but later in defending my choice when told I should color my hair was to respond that "silver is a color". BTW, your hair is gorgeous...Just the way it is :flower:

Valdeon

May 6th, 2011, 07:51 AM

Thank you, angelthadiva:blossom:
I am not afraid that he would say something like that. We do know each other all to well, and at times he just likes to tease me and IRL not pushy at all. It's just me being all... indecisive and not understanding at all how my man cannot distinguish damaged processed hair from healthy hair to save his life.

BTW I love your answer, silver is da color and a gorgeous one! :cheese:

Mesmerise

May 6th, 2011, 07:54 AM

The only time you should change your hair is because you want to! It is disappointing when someone you care about, and who professes to love you, says they don't like your natural colour (and what is WITH that, cause you have beautiful hair naturally!) and they'd prefer you a different way.

I mean, in my eyes, it's okay if someone tells me they prefer me natural (cause that's complimenting me the way I was made lol) but even so, if I didn't want to be natural, I still wouldn't be (if you know what I mean), but if I WAS natural and I was told I'd look better if I changed something (like bleach my hair, get a nose job or whatever) I'd be offended! I am what I am and if you don't like it, too bad ;)

There's NOTHING wrong with being your natural colour!

spidermom

May 6th, 2011, 08:04 AM

We have a member here with extra-long hair - knee I think - and she's been using Sun-In for years. It's already naturally blonde, and she likes it a little lighter. She has gorgeous hair.

And so do you.

dragonchickx

May 6th, 2011, 08:14 AM

guys say stuff they dont mean sometimes, and Im sure if he knew what it would do to your hair he wouldnt want you to do that.. take caution!! I don't regret growing out my hightlights its easier to maintain and not expensive hehe.

growingpains

May 6th, 2011, 08:20 AM

The difference is subtle, as is the difference in texture. It looks healthier now. I think if you go lighter you will have a trade off in damage to some extent. It may be minute, but it may also prevent long locks.

At the end of the day, as great as it is to have your BF enjoy the way you look, your hair is for you.

I think it's unfair of your BF to 'get upset' with you for BEING YOU. Seriously, you should not be expected to be anything other than who you are and that he wants differently kind of comes off as unsupportive, possibly controlling (hard to tell w/ limited info), and just inappropriate.

elbow chic

May 6th, 2011, 08:21 AM

You have fabulous hair. Peroxide blondes are a dime a dozen, but you have the real thing.

If he can't appreciate that, there's no point in worrying about his tastes overmuch. ;)

AspenSong

May 6th, 2011, 08:35 AM

Your hair is so beautiful!! I vote DON'T touch any dye!! :)
There's a fair amount of in-laws around me who would really like me better with short hair, blonde hair again, etc but I ignore them. It's your hair! In the end when you've been working to keep and get it healthy, it doesn't affect another person to pour something damaging on it....but it does affect You and your work. So just stick to your guns, and realize it's so gorgeous like it is!! :)

KittyLost

May 6th, 2011, 09:41 AM

I love the colour of your hair now waaaay more than the colour in the other pictures that he likes.

DoubleCrowned

May 6th, 2011, 11:13 AM

I, too, think your natural color is stunning and would not change it. One thing that no one has mentioned, though, is the possible answer to why you sometimes dislike your hair color.

I know a girl whose hair was similar to yours in color. It was unusually beautiful but actually looked mousy sometimes. The reason, we discovered, was her wardrobe. Some colors just killed her coloring. When she found colors that truly complimented her skin, her hair also came alive.

If you are still looking for advise, mine is to take a day for yourself to shop for some new tops that bring out your hair's best colors.

BabyRay33

May 6th, 2011, 11:28 AM

I think that guys sometimes think that they want something, but when they get it it turns out that it wasn't as great as they thought.

I think what he wants is a change, but more than likely, it could affect more than just your color. It could damage your hair, and you cant get back the "natural" thing that takes so much effort.

If you dyed it, I wouldn't be surprised that later, after it was done, he noticed that it wasn't as shiny or nice as it was, and he would not like it as much. Men are naturally drawn to healthy hair. Not necessarily dyed hair. So the health would be what I would try to keep.

Your hair should just be for you and seeing as you have worked really hard, as all of us here do for our hair, to keep it natural and nice, you shouldn't give up on it.

just my twocents.

xoxophelia

May 6th, 2011, 12:03 PM

Valdeon

May 6th, 2011, 12:58 PM

You know what I noticed.. in the earlier photos your hair was wavy and in the new ones straight. Is it possible he actually likes the large body waves? You can do a few buns on damp hair until it dries. It won't cause damage and maybe that is what he is actually into/

You are absolutely right. He loves waves and volume and long hair, and I don't mind curling my hair from time to time (pig tails, buns, braids) and I am keen on volume and the idea of my hair being longer myself. In the past I curled my hair every single day (because in its natural state it looked eeky), I guess he just got used to it (now I almost always wear it straight because it is in much better shape and looks decent as it is:D)

I know a girl whose hair was similar to yours in color. It was unusually beautiful but actually looked mousy sometimes. The reason, we discovered, was her wardrobe. Some colors just killed her coloring. When she found colors that truly complimented her skin, her hair also came alive.

Very interesting! I spotted that navy blue, deep blue, aquamarine and dark red really help my hair color pop!

Anyway, I cannot thank you all enough for the wonderful advice and support! :flower::flower::flower: I feel so much better now after hearing all the opinions and the ideas!

MrsGuther

May 6th, 2011, 01:18 PM

If you do not want to highlight your hair or color treat your hair, then DON'T DO IT!!! Your hair looks very beautiful the way it is. You should only color it/highlight it if it is what you want to do, not because of the suggestion of your DBF. He may have just been making casual conversation, not actually suggesting that you go and color your hair. Explain to him that the health of your hair is what is most important to you and that you are trying to grow out your natural hair color. He should understand and be supportive of your good hair health efforts.

BrightEyes7

May 6th, 2011, 01:43 PM

Do what makes you happy.

I think your hair color now is gorgeous and not much of a difference from the lighter color. Your hair may lighten more over the summer. Try waiting.

Or since you have naturally light hair, you may benefit from honey lightening. It is non-damaging so you can repeat the process multiple times with no ill-effects to reach the color of choice.

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=148

Here is the honey lightening thread.

I think you should try 'natural' methods before you damage your hair with bleach, IMHO.

And to me it sounds like it doesn't matter much to your BF, so why not just do what makes YOU happy!

MrsGuther

May 6th, 2011, 01:50 PM

Springlets

May 6th, 2011, 02:21 PM

I don't see how your boyfriend can think you have anything but light blonde hair. I suppose it changes a little in tone in different lights- in the sun it looks more golden, in the daylight it looks more pale ash (it looks like Luna Lovegood hair in that pic lol). But I'd think that would be an attractive thing to a guy.

But I understand. I'm trying to grow out my natural hair from dye and even though it's a nice medium blonde, my boyfriend loved my hair when I used Sun-In to make it platinum, and I've been missing it too. I've been using honey treatments to try and lighten it, but its been slow going. If I get really desperate, I might try coconut oil and Sun-In too.

scorpio_rising

May 6th, 2011, 02:44 PM

You have fabulous hair. Peroxide blondes are a dime a dozen, but you have the real thing.

If he can't appreciate that, there's no point in worrying about his tastes overmuch. ;)

That. ^ ..........

IcarusBride

May 6th, 2011, 04:17 PM

BrightEyes7

May 6th, 2011, 04:28 PM

I think your DBF was probably just trying to engage in conversation with you! Most guys I know know squat about hair and coloring. If your DBF is like any of these guys, his comments are kind of off-hand attempts to make SOME comment on the topic so you know he does care about what you are saying.

That made me laugh because it's so true. :laugh:

Did the conversation go something like "Honey, do you like my hair color now or did you like it more before?" "Umm, yeah" "So you think I should get highlights or no?" "Yeah, I think that would look nice"

I've had the same/similar conversations with the men in my life. Dad is the worst. I changed my hair color and length dramatically once and he didn't even notice until my mom got home and freaked out about it. Then his was response was "yeah, I guess it's a little darker" I went from blonde to dark brown. Men! :rolleyes:

Bene

May 6th, 2011, 05:26 PM

I had a whole thingy typed up but then my phone burped or something and I lost all of it. It's probably for the best. In hindsight what I had spewed originally wasn't very nice.

The main idea was this: YOU want to highlight your hair? Go for it. YOU don't want to highlight your hair? Don't.

julliams

May 6th, 2011, 07:53 PM

I do love your natural hair colour. It is so lovely. Just a thought - next time you go to the salon and get just a trim, ask your BF if he likes the new highlights and see what his reaction is? Will he notice that you haven't actually had any put in?

lacefrost

May 6th, 2011, 09:38 PM

I wouldn't change my hair color. You asked him what he liked BEST. Just because he likes warmer blondes best doesn't mean he doesn't love your hair or your hair color. It doesn't mean he wants you to change it. Think of it like clothes. You have a favorite shirt but it doesn't mean that you don't like all the other shirts you have.

xoxophelia

May 6th, 2011, 09:40 PM

Oh! Idea!... if you wanted to, you could try out cassia. It will give a warmer yellow tone and fade out as well.

Roseate

May 6th, 2011, 09:51 PM

You have fabulous hair. Peroxide blondes are a dime a dozen, but you have the real thing.

If he can't appreciate that, there's no point in worrying about his tastes overmuch. ;)

I totally agree. I don't always love my haircolor, but I always love being able to answer "yes" when asked, "is that your real hair color?".

It's satisfying to me to have a unique natural shade, all my own, instead of shade 8N that anyone could get out of a box. Dyed hair is beautiful too, and I used to enjoy it on myself, but I'm just... done with that. I like what I've got.

Your hair is gorgeous, wear it with pride!

McFearless

May 6th, 2011, 09:52 PM

Your hair looks gorgeous. I love how it looks now. Don't dye it! He may like it but I'm sure he likes the way it is now, too. Who cares either way :p

gthlvrmx

May 6th, 2011, 10:22 PM

I love your natural color so much!! :) It makes me smile! So healthy and shiny. Just do whatever YOU want to do, he'll be happy with you i'm sure :)

UltraBella

May 6th, 2011, 10:37 PM

I am all for anything you want to do to your hair, as long as it is for YOU.
My mother has wanted me to cut my hair for years, but it's not her hair, so why does she care ?
I personally love highlights in my hair and I don't have any damage from them so I will continue to get them until I decide on something else. My husband only cares that I am happy with my hair, his preference is whatever makes me feel best.
I think your hair color is lovely :)