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Annie Fulton
May 4th, 2011, 09:13 PM
So, my best friend and I tease each other a lot. Our way of teasing usually turns into a bit of a wrestling match. It can get violent (not in a bad way), but we are just playing with each other. Neither of us would ever intentionally hurt the other. Well, for some reason, my best friend's thing is pulling hair. Whenever we get really into eat, she usually starts yanking. I don't really like it, but I've never said anything because I know we both get really into it.

Well, tonight we had another match (so to speak :p). When I was coming back home, I absentmindedly ran my fingers through my hair, and out came a chunk of hair. I think it's because of her pulling it, which she did tonight.

So, how can I ask her to stop this without hurting her? She has long hair also, but I do not pull hers. It may sound like she's being mean, but she's really not. I know I could simply talk to her, but she is the type to get kind of hurt and continually apologize, which would make me feel bad for hurting her feelings.

So, does anyone have any creative ideas? Sorry this was kind of long, and thanks for any feedback! ;)

Fog
May 4th, 2011, 09:15 PM
There is no way around it. You have to talk to her about it if you want her to stop. Just be low-key about it, and I'm sure any hurt feelings will heal quickly.

Viscountess
May 4th, 2011, 09:18 PM
Sounds like your mutual horse play needs some boundaries....

How about "hair pulling is OFF LIMITS" then go to it. As soon as she pulls your hair, disengage and say "off limits... I told ya!" and don't re-engage until she promises not to pull your hair.

Everytime she pulls the hair, dis-engage the horseplay. You HAVE to be consistent tho... its almost like training a puppy (please don't take that badly) in the sense that you have to always back up your request of hair pulling being off limits by quitting the wrestling as soon as she does it.

jojo
May 5th, 2011, 08:06 AM
Tell her your really head sore and although you know she is only messing, you got a really bad headache last time (white lie but never mind!) so heads are out of boundaries.

Firefox7275
May 5th, 2011, 08:07 AM
I think I would tell her the truth, that you lost a small clump of hair and that you are scared that you have been hurting her when you were both just having fun. Or suggest a wall chart of rules that you prepare together, alongside a score chart for your annual wrestling championship or list of fun forfeits! Either that or just stop teasing her back so you don't fight so much ...

Anje
May 5th, 2011, 08:10 AM
I'd just tell her she needs to back off a bit on the hair pulling, because she made it come out in chunks, and you don't like that.

Perhaps switch to pillowfights.

angelthadiva
May 5th, 2011, 08:17 AM
If someone ripped a patch of my hair out, all bets would be off. Trust me when I say that would be the last time she did that! She'd be too busy nursing that black eye ;)

I think that's way beyond the limit of horseplay. Can you find something else to do? Like read, shopping or volunteer your time?

Her feelings are hers, you can't control how she feels. Say what you need to say as nicely as you can and let her deal with her own feelings. If she apologizes, accept and move on--And keep your hands to yourself! I think that may have been a missed lesson way back in Kindergarten.