Tired of it

[Rivanariko]

To those who have been on your growing journeys for far longer than I, do you have points that you go through where you're just like "F--- it, it can do whatever it wants". I'm completely there right now.

It's not an urge to cut my hair, it's complete and utter ambivalence toward it. I keep braiding it in the evening because I know that I'll regret leaving it down when I have to bun it the next morning, and if I have to detangle it there's a good chance I'll just go back to tearing it out with a paddle brush. My routine was already pretty benign neglect-y. I wash about once a week, and leave it in a braid or a bun all of the time. So why am I feeling so burned out on it?

What can I do to rekindle my interest in my hair? I cannot in any way afford new hair toys right now. (DF is military, so we're not sure how things are going to go with the whole budget nonsense in the next month or so) I have to have my hair up and out of the way at work and the idea of spending more than the 10 seconds it takes me to do my celtic knot bun in the morning makes me want to lop it all off. (okay, maybe some slight urges to cut, but only out of frustration) I don't really go anywhere outside of work except to the barn, ,where I have to have it in a low braid so that my helmet will fit. Everywhere else I pretty much just go after work, so spending time to style my hair isn't really an option. I get enough attention just braiding it in the locker room.

So what do you do? How do you gain interest back in your hair? Right now I've basically got the beginnings of three dreads hanging off the back of my head that I can braid and then twist up the next morning. I'm thinking of doing a deep conditioning tonight, but my hair takes so freaking long to dry and I know I'm going to want to go to bed in an hour or so...

[MeganE]

I was feeling a bit like that a couple of months ago, my hair was longer than it had ever been and was really driving me crazy. I ended up chopping five inches off, and it was nice to have a little less length to mess with, and also it renewed my interest in growing it long.

After I cut it, I realized I was taking for granted the length I had, and losing some of it kind of put that into perspective. If that makes sense. I probably will always resort to a major trim whenever my hair starts driving me mad.

But mine also grows fast, so sometimes I feel like it's getting longer faster than I can adjust to the new length. So major trims help keep the growth at a pace I can adjust to. I do eventually want my hair to be very long, but I want to get there slowly... if that makes sense.

[Anathema]

Oh, I know exactly what you're talking about!

I'm actually pestered by my length sometimes, really annoyed and frustrated. It only looks good on the third and fourth day after a wash, takes almost an entire day to get completely dry, being a complete pain in the ass to find a good way of putting it up when it's time to work out, drawing too much attention if I leave it out, etc...

Honestly, I think it might be since I actually started to try to grow my hair longer that my being pestered by my hair began. I guess I grew more concious? Plus it grew longer faster, and therefor drew more attention when I just let it hang. All I ever did was doing buns and knots, and some occasional braid. I never saw my hair, and I guess that made me just take it for granted and not appriciate it as much as I should have.

I ended up cutting about 8 inches off, to even it out and just make it more managable and a better length.
It's like I thought a hair cut would do miracles or something. It's still unruly enough to make me curse on a daily basis, and it's still too long to not draw attention, and it's still frustrating. I guess a part of me just wants to cut the rest off too, "since I already started". But really, I regret cutting so much off. Should have settled with just 3-4 inches or something, since it actually would have been enough to even it out.. I think. The biggest problem with getting my hair cut is definately that I can't do my favourite bun (celtic knot) anymore. I used to wear it basically all times, and now I have no good updo that will hold for more than 20 minutes. Makes me regret cutting it a whole lot more, let me tell you!

I'm a bit scared that the love and interest for my hair will never really come back, so if anyone have any other tips than cutting and finding new updos to revive it; Let me know! I'm in desperate need for them.

[shikara]

First I want to comments on your statement about wanting to deep condition but your hair doesn't dry in time for bed. I know everyone's hair is different, but I love putting my hair in my bun when it is still quite damp - it makes it so soft and manageable. If you did this, then when you get home for the evening, put on something (or take something off!) and wear your hair down a little so you can feel it draping down your back, against your derriere, and around your arms. Look at it a little in the mirror, and be proud of the patience and perseverance you had in growing it, play with it and post pictures in your album. I did one post that I think is called DIY Jewelled Hair Inserts, and you can make these for next to nothing. I've got another project going where the inserts can cost less than $2 and hope to post that by next weekend. If you ever wear a braid, wear it in front sometimes so you can see it.

A long time ago, when I had my hair the same length as it is now, I got it cut. The style looked really good (it suited me) but the time and trouble was certainly not my thing - plus it never looked the same at noon as it did when I had just finished styling it. Then when I decided to grow it long, I was disappointed that I had cut it. At that time, I made a promise to myself to ignore urges to cut, realizing that it takes a minute to cut, and gentle loving care and patience to grow it. I'm looking forward to hearing other's ideas!

[morecowbell]

:grouphug: I'm sorry to hear that you're getting bored and frustrated with your hair. Take comfort in the fact that most of use who've had hair longer than BSL have probably all gone through a time like this.
I have, that's for sure! And because my Mom can cut hair, anytime I had an urge, she was willing to cut! Which means that I have had 5-6 big chops due to frustration. Believe me, it's something that I still struggle with, so I know what you're feeling. :blossom:
I think shikara had some great advice. :) When I get bored with my hair, I do a deep treatment, or oil it, anything to make it soft and touchable. Doing something as simple as reveling in your own hair can make you feel so special/sexy/beautiful, and I would second the idea of wearing a bra or something and just feeling your hair on your back. Now that I'm thisclose to BSL (for the first time in 5 years), it's a feeling that makes me very happy. :)

Another route is to think about how much you wanted long hair while you were growing it out. Or since your goal is longer, visualize how it will feel and what it will look like at your goal.

I think you have beautiful hair, and as you can imagine, I'm quite envious of your length! ;) If all else fails, post some pics of your beautiful hair and let the compliments change your feelings! :p

[Rivanariko]

I think you have beautiful hair, and as you can imagine, I'm quite envious of your length! ;) If all else fails, post some pics of your beautiful hair and let the compliments change your feelings! :pHaha, now there's an idea!

I really have no desire to cut in actuality. I get the frustrated "Just cut it all off!" feeling where I just want to take a pair of scissors to the base of my braid and be done with it, but no way am I going to do that. I've never had short hair and I'm way too much of a chicken to do something that drastic!

I think my routine just needs some revamping. When I lived in an area with lovely soft water, shampooing every other week with WO rinses in between was perfect. Now that I've moved to a hard water area I can't do WO because it makes it feel like there's gravel in my hair, so I'm now only washing it once a week or longer, and it just gets too tangled after a few days, I can't deal with it. It's the detangling that I'm fed up with, really. I brushed my hair last night for the first time in months, and the first time since I joined LHC that I didn't finger-comb and detangle first. I didn't rip through it like I used to Pre-LHC, I took my time to be careful, but it came out looking so shiny and smooth and lovely.

Washing my hair every two or three days still seems like a huge hassle, since my hair takes 2-3 hours to dry completely (and that's now while the air is dry, I don't want to think what it'll be like in the summer when the humidity hits!). If I braid it or bun it while it's damp, it won't dry, and I can't sleep in a bun. But I might make an effort to try washing a little more often again. See if that keeps me happier. Maybe look into a leave-in of some sort... just something to help keep the tangles at bay! I think I must have the only hair in existence that can tangle while it's in a bun or a braid!

I think part of my frustration may also stem from frustrations in other areas of my life... but that's an entirely different can of worms. Maybe forcing myself to take some time to enjoy my hair again will help to put a few things in perspective as well.

Thanks everyone :flower

[ericthegreat]

I've been there too lots of days. At least a few times a week or so, I'll get tired of waiting for my hair to dry or get impatient detangling my all my hair that I'll think to myself maybe I should cut several inches back. But at the very last moment, I always stop myself because I know my long term lifelong goal is to always have longer than average hair.

Now, I don't know if you may have that same lifelong goal Rivanariko, but if you know that you have always pictured yourself with longer hair, then don't give in to a crazy cut urge! When I have my "I hate my hair" moments, I then make a neat braid or a big bun or a sleek ponytail or any other up-style and then I love my hair again. Maybe you can try out a few more new buns or braids from the Articles section?

[Panth]

Haha, now there's an idea!

I really have no desire to cut in actuality. I get the frustrated "Just cut it all off!" feeling where I just want to take a pair of scissors to the base of my braid and be done with it, but no way am I going to do that. I've never had short hair and I'm way too much of a chicken to do something that drastic!

I think my routine just needs some revamping. When I lived in an area with lovely soft water, shampooing every other week with WO rinses in between was perfect. Now that I've moved to a hard water area I can't do WO because it makes it feel like there's gravel in my hair, so I'm now only washing it once a week or longer, and it just gets too tangled after a few days, I can't deal with it. It's the detangling that I'm fed up with, really. I brushed my hair last night for the first time in months, and the first time since I joined LHC that I didn't finger-comb and detangle first. I didn't rip through it like I used to Pre-LHC, I took my time to be careful, but it came out looking so shiny and smooth and lovely.

Washing my hair every two or three days still seems like a huge hassle, since my hair takes 2-3 hours to dry completely (and that's now while the air is dry, I don't want to think what it'll be like in the summer when the humidity hits!). If I braid it or bun it while it's damp, it won't dry, and I can't sleep in a bun. But I might make an effort to try washing a little more often again. See if that keeps me happier. Maybe look into a leave-in of some sort... just something to help keep the tangles at bay! I think I must have the only hair in existence that can tangle while it's in a bun or a braid!

I think part of my frustration may also stem from frustrations in other areas of my life... but that's an entirely different can of worms. Maybe forcing myself to take some time to enjoy my hair again will help to put a few things in perspective as well.

Thanks everyone :flower

As far as detangling goes - perhaps an oil, a conditioner or a butter/serum/leave-in? Something that makes it all slippery and sleek.

I don't know if because you were WO you might have issues with cones ... but, provided they work ok on your hair, perhaps try that? It's definitely less damage than cutting! Detangling would, hopefully, be less of an issue.