View Full Version : I´m so tired with all this damage

April 3rd, 2011, 05:44 AM
Ok, so I´m now tired. I have taken good care with my hair for about two years. I have tried everything. I condition with moisturizer, reconstructer, use leave-ins, oils and co. I use clarifying shampoo once in a month.

My hair is quite good shape, it´s soft and shiny, but I have splits all over it. I cant understand why. I use protective updo´s, I never sleep with my hair loose. I cover it with hats when it´s cold or warm.

I used s&d, but it doesen´t help, splits are all over, up and down in my hair. If I want them gone, I would have to cut my hair to my elbows.

You can see my frustration? I use good conditioners and shampoos, nothing helps. I´ve sit hours with deep conditioners, twice at week, and that doesen´t make any difference.

My hair is curly and dry but I cant understand why it doesen´t respond my good care. I´m so frustrated. I´ve tried everything and now I´m with scissors and think that I cut all this worries away. My hair is now mid-back lenght.

I´m so desperate, all I wanted was long, healthy hair and I just can´t get it. Never.

April 3rd, 2011, 05:51 AM
Well you almost described my hair except for the curly. I could s&d for 8 hours straight and still find more splits. Yet my hair is past tailbone and almost to clasic. Just becuase you have splits doesn't mean you can't have the long hair you want... :)

I've learned to ignore the splits for the most part and just keep the lenght as healthy as I can. This has given me nice, soft, shiny hair.

April 3rd, 2011, 06:34 AM
Have you tried catnip tea soaks? I still get some breakage from my damaged ends, but splits have been greatly reduced.

April 3rd, 2011, 06:41 AM
Some people just get a lot of splits, and they can still have long and beautiful hair. Almost everyone has something about their hair that feels like a deal-breaker for long hair, but almost everyone can also work around that. I, for example, have a lot of tangles, but i have learnt to just ignore it and detangle carefully at nigh, then its not a problem. Its annoying, it causes damage, but it is nothing that is going to stop me from growing it to classic. :D

I suggest you just ignore it and go on with your regular routine. Sooner or later you will come to terms with it and it wont be so awful.

April 3rd, 2011, 07:25 AM
Maybe the hats are causing this?
Don't know, just an idea....

Jenn of Pence
April 3rd, 2011, 09:15 AM
I definitely agree that sometimes hair, particularly long hair, just splits. It doesn't mean that overall it's unhealthy or damaged, and it can be long and beautiful despite splits. I think most of us on the forum are this way (including myself), and we just have to do the best we can, as you have done very well, and realize this is just part of having long hair.

April 3rd, 2011, 09:44 AM
If your hair looks good when you're not closely examining every little end, and it feels nice when you run your fingers through it (i.e. not crunchy, dry, etc), splits are not something to panic over. We all have split ends, and good amounts of them at the longer lengths, and I promise you right now they are not the end of your long hair world. Keep babying your hair, and if the ends start to look icky, even from afar, then it's trim time. So take it easy, and don't panic.

April 3rd, 2011, 09:52 AM
I have the splitty hair type, too. I find that it does much better when I have regular small trims (about 1/2 inch off every 3 months). I've tried on 2 separate occasions to grow for an entire year with nothing but S&D, and I had so many split ends at the end of each year that I cut away pretty much my entire year of growth because of the tangles/knots. On me, damage travels upward and spreads (because of the difficult in untangling it).

April 3rd, 2011, 09:55 AM
have you tried protein treatments?
im sorry that you're having all this damage :( i hope you find a way to make it go away

April 3rd, 2011, 10:12 AM
You could try switching care methods - like herbs, wo, so, bs, and co. I also agree with MoonlightShadow with the protein. Did you try trimming of some length? I know it sounds bad but it helps sometimes. How do you wear your hair up? Tight or loose? Elastics or Hair sticks?Some people actually find more split ends from keeping their hair up all the time. If your hair gets caught in things it can cause some everyday damage. You could try stretching your washings and air-drying. If you swim often it could be the saltwater/chlorine, and if your out in the sun all day it could be slightly burned. I also think curly hair shouldn't be brushed from what I've heard- but detangled in the shower. I also think that long would probaly have split ends all over naturally, but that doesn't mean your hair is damaged. If you oil your hair it might give it some "slip" so it won't tangle as often. Wearing your hat less often if it's a little tight or isn't lined with satin on the inside might help. Catnip soaks are recommended. What kind of hair type is it? Your info says it's not coarse, so you might be over-conditioning. You might also be interested in the link below.

I hope you'll find something that works for you :)


*Edit: Oops, I re-read your post and saw that your hair is actually just fine, but it's your split ends bothering. Sorry I didn't notice that in the first place. Silly me :o

April 3rd, 2011, 10:27 AM
Thank you all for comfort and support. I´m relieved that someone else have that same issue that I have. I was thinking that something was wrong with the way I treated my hair.

My lenght isn´t tangly, it hardly tangles at all. Ends doesen´t seem crunchy or dry, and my curls are like jumping, you know what I mean? They seem so wealthy, until you take a close look.

I´m thankful with all advices. I shall cut ends a little bit when they get tangled and crunchy. I shall now relax and keep on growing. I´ve trimmed it twice per year, when they seem to need it.

PolythenePam, I haven´t try catnip tea soaks, actually I don´t understand what you mean. My english is very poor, last time I´ve studied English was 6 years ago. Haven´t use English since :)

Protein treatments I´ve tried many times and my hair respond it very well. It seems my hair loves protein and can´t get it enough. I have strong protein treatments, I use them once/twice per month.

Thank you all! Let´s keep on growing and I put scissors away and just love my hair and all its splits.

April 3rd, 2011, 10:30 AM
When hair gets to a relatively very long length, often split ends are just a fact of life. When you have exceptionally longer hair, you can't hold it to the same standards as you would with shorter hair. Very long hair is much older, by years older than shorter hair, so the ends will always naturally suffer more damage. When talking about very long hair, its best to look at its overall health. Is the hair extremely dry feeling, are there lots of short broken hairs all over the place? If so then yeah, you do have significant damage.

But, your hair as you've said is soft and shiny. That's a main indicator of good overall hair health. :) Don't worry about all the split ends, pretty much everyone on the planet with significantly longer hair has at least some of them on their heads. You can just let them be. If they both you that much, just S&D hem out or get just a small trim.

April 3rd, 2011, 01:37 PM
Safira, do you oil? Sometimes a little oil on the ends of your hair will make all the difference. Since I started oiling, my splits have greatly reduced.

April 3rd, 2011, 02:11 PM
My hair used to split like crazy and it is much better since I started using catnip rinses. I make a tea with catnip, let it cool, strain it, and use it as a final rinse when I shower. I let it sit on my hair for a few minutes before I rinse it out. Other folks leave it in much longer. I stopped using it for a while to see if it really was making that much of a difference and I ended up with a ton of split ends so I am really motivated to use it with every washing.

April 4th, 2011, 07:06 AM
Othala, I use oils with leave-ins, and I deep oil twice/once per month. I use coconut oil, coconut butter, shea butter and avocado oil, I mix it all together. I use one (big) teacup to all my hair and scalp. leave it for hour or two and co-wash it away. It doesen´t make my hair oily. Sadly, even this doesen´t help splits. But it sure helps with frizziness :)

Eric, thanks for comfort. I try to ignore these splits. You´re right about that if hair is in good condition, splits just doesen´t tell it all.

And thank you for that catnip-advice. I solved it out what it means and I would like to give it a try.

April 4th, 2011, 07:24 AM
You say you S&D a lot, what kind of scissors are you using? Good quality, sharp hair scissors can make all the difference on how fast your hair splits when you trim. Using dull scissors will result in more splits faster even though you snip them off.

April 4th, 2011, 07:30 AM
I'm one of those people who get lots of splits - my hair is overall healthy and strong and looks good, but I always have lots of splits and I always have. I take good care of my hair, but ultimately the hair splits as it gets long. So long as the ends are soft and not crunchy, and I like how it looks, I don't care :D

April 4th, 2011, 07:30 AM
You say you S&D a lot, what kind of scissors are you using? Good quality, sharp hair scissors can make all the difference on how fast your hair splits when you trim. Using dull scissors will result in more splits faster even though you snip them off.

Thank you - I was going to write this, but as a newbie here I was afraid to give advice :o:D