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Fingolphin
March 3rd, 2011, 05:24 PM
Just a little something that's kind of annoyed me for a while. So many posts here begin as or are titled something like, "Okay ladies..." or, "let me know what you think, ladies," or something similar. Now of course it's a no brainer if it's about bras or menstrual issues or whatever. I'm not talking about that. Most of them are about hair, and it's like it is assumed that men here automatically wouldn't care anything about it, or like we don't exist. Obviously, on the whole, more women than men have long hair. I'm not mad at anyone or anything like that. Just please remember, everyone, that there are guys here, too, who are also trying to care for their hair. :D

princessp
March 3rd, 2011, 05:30 PM
How could we possibly forget our LHGs (long haired gentlemen)! :D

Coan-Teen
March 3rd, 2011, 05:34 PM
I find it much easier to remember the guys than all the ladies because they seem exotic. It's like I'm on a nature documentary. "If you look in this thread here, you'll see the OP is, in fact, an LHG. The LHG, or long-haired gentleman, is a rare and valued specimen in the Long Hair World." ^_~

In seriousness, though, I have noticed that as a general tendency and wondered how it made the gents feel. Good to know, and if I ever start a thread I'll be sure to include the fellas.

Oz
March 3rd, 2011, 05:40 PM
i love guys that are here . guys guys guys.. i wish it was ALL guys. haha

Athena's Owl
March 3rd, 2011, 05:51 PM
I find it much easier to remember the guys than all the ladies because they seem exotic. It's like I'm on a nature documentary. "If you look in this thread here, you'll see the OP is, in fact, an LHG. The LHG, or long-haired gentleman, is a rare and valued specimen in the Long Hair World." ^_~

I laughed.

but yeah I get with the OP wanting to point out that addressing posts as if there were only women here makes the men here invisible - certainly if you're writing a post where you are specifically addressing women or men it would be proper, but then again I would worry about people feeling unwelcome to read and participate.

but I guess that's another question - if the address to women (or men) is specific do you feel like you can't read or participate if you're not who was addressed? i think it depends. there are some threads here I would never read because they are not directed at me, and that's *perfectly okay* as far as I'm concerned.

Fingolphin
March 3rd, 2011, 05:56 PM
I honestly read all kinds of threads here, no matter who it is directed at, because I find all kinds of things interesting. Sometimes I participate as well, even if directed at the opposite gender, if I have something to say. I just like it when general threads are addressed to "everyone" or "ya'll" or whatever other universal terms there are. But yeah, it does kinda make me feel slightly like I'm being excluded when there's a post about hair addressed to "ladies." We're in a bigger world than that.

Zarah
March 3rd, 2011, 06:02 PM
I'm guilty. Sorry. But it's bc it just so happens that everyone who posted in one of my threads were all female. lol.

I will remember for next time. ;)

Oh & um, men with long hair = sexy. How u doin'

UltraBella
March 3rd, 2011, 06:40 PM
Yes, men are invisible and all hairdressers are evil, happens frequently around here........

kabelaced
March 3rd, 2011, 06:45 PM
There does seem to be a lot of threads that start with "Okay, ladies..." That I agree with.

In the Friendship/Health parts of the board where I often go, however, I rarely see any topics posted by men. (This may also be explained by how often I've been on lately, though.)

I look forward to seeing more male members posting topics. :D Any Ask-A-Guy threads out there, or would that be inappropriate?

Nae
March 3rd, 2011, 06:47 PM
Yes, men are invisible and all hairdressers are evil, happens frequently around here........

How bout if we combine them? Then we get invisible hairdressers!!!;) SCARY!

But I think the OP has a really good point. I think we should be as universal as possible when we address our community. So ladies and gentlemen, I salute you!!!!

Gemma
March 3rd, 2011, 06:51 PM
This continually gets brought up. Women are the majority here and it's often just a turn of phrase, kind of like how "hey guys!" is a greeting that can address a group of mixed genders. I don't think anyone is meaning to exclude the men of this community.

Pyvsi
March 3rd, 2011, 07:02 PM
And now, a message from Pyvsi's Evil Twin:

"Hey, you invisible, slighted men in a woman's world. How does it feel? Huh? HUH?"

That is all.

Pyvsi here: Hi longhair guys, we're glad you're here and we enjoy your company. :cheese:

kwaniesiam
March 3rd, 2011, 07:20 PM
How bout if we combine them? Then we get invisible hairdressers!!!;) SCARY!

But I think the OP has a really good point. I think we should be as universal as possible when we address our community. So ladies and gentlemen, I salute you!!!!

Sometimes we feel invisible too :lol:

(hairdresser speaking, not a guy ;) )

CarpeDM
March 3rd, 2011, 07:21 PM
I try not to do that (the ok ladies)... to tell you the truth I don't really hear much from the guys?? And I'm not talking about any girlie type threads, I'm talking about hair of course, where are you all hiding? I would love to hear from guys that are thin haired, want to show me hair cleavage or have good products to recommend...like Frasier Crane would say "I'm listening", or in this case, "I'm reading"...

islandboo
March 3rd, 2011, 07:22 PM
I am always pleased to see the LHG post! I think I have only been guilty of being lady-centric once, and in fairness I was addressing the recent active posters who were all women. However, I shall endeavor to be more neutral in the future so as not to slight any gents that may be lurking.

And Pyvsi, your Evil Twin is kinda funny - throw a cookie down in the basement for her :p (I frequent another forum where I am invariably addressed as dude/guy/man)

krissykins
March 3rd, 2011, 07:28 PM
:grouphug: I won't exclude you! I appreciate all the long haired men here!

ericthegreat
March 3rd, 2011, 07:40 PM
This continually gets brought up. Women are the majority here and it's often just a turn of phrase, kind of like how "hey guys!" is a greeting that can address a group of mixed genders. I don't think anyone is meaning to exclude the men of this community.


I'm a guy myself, and I agree with Gemma. The vast overwhelming majority of members here are women, probably close to 90% or maybe more. Should a thread here happen to be titled "Ladies..............", its not made with the deliberate intent to exclude men from that thread. Sure, it would be nice if both men and women were addressed equally in every thread, but its not something to be annoyed or angry over.

Fingolphin
March 3rd, 2011, 08:13 PM
I am certainly not angry, but it has happened enough for me to notice, that's all. And, of course, I certainly don't believe anyone has meant it with any malicious intent. For the most part, I think people here are some of the most understanding, sensitive, wonderful people to be found online. Really.

Peter
March 3rd, 2011, 08:40 PM
I've noticed it too. Alun made a thread about this very issue a while back. It's not like it ruins my day, but it does stand out to me.


And now, a message from Pyvsi's Evil Twin:

"Hey, you invisible, slighted men in a woman's world. How does it feel? Huh? HUH?"
It's always nice when someone slaps reality in my face. :) You're so right. (not sarcasm, I really mean it)

Coan-Teen
March 3rd, 2011, 08:44 PM
And now, a message from Pyvsi's Evil Twin:

"Hey, you invisible, slighted men in a woman's world. How does it feel? Huh? HUH?"

Heh. Your evil twin sounds a lot like my regular self. :D

karenpetal
March 3rd, 2011, 09:02 PM
Just a thought - how abt we coin a term for all us hair lovers irrespective of gender !!!

Fingolphin
March 3rd, 2011, 09:12 PM
Ooh! Ooh! I kinda like that!

QueenMadge
March 3rd, 2011, 10:16 PM
I appreciate a LHG speaking up, so thank you for reminding us, that yes the boys like to play too:-)

This happens in my hand spinning group too. We have two men who are members and sometimes we women can veer off into conversation topics that leave them uncomfortable at the very least.

gthlvrmx
March 3rd, 2011, 10:43 PM
Go us! :D Long hair guys you men are inspirations :D

ScarlettAdelle
March 3rd, 2011, 10:54 PM
I always wondered how y'all felt about that...

I guess it's kinda like how sometimes people will say "hey guys!" and leave off "and girls." It's meant inclusively, but sometimes it doesn't really translate that way XD

I recall posting "ladies" in some thread and going back and adding "and gents" in parentheses just in case XD

wandabee
March 3rd, 2011, 11:16 PM
My boy used to have past shoulder length golden curls (he simply neglected to cut it for a few years!!), but after a while, I requested that he cut it, simply because he wasn't brushing it. I regret having done so, because his hair is SO gorgeous and thick, and is the most lovely blond :) In any case, YAY for males with long hair! ;D

Fufu
March 3rd, 2011, 11:50 PM
I always like to say Ladies & Gentlemen, I'm aware of many awesome long-haired gentlemen here :)

trolleypup
March 4th, 2011, 01:34 AM
Ah, turning male privilege on its head for a brief moment.

*shrug*

It bothers me not at all.

Toadstool
March 4th, 2011, 01:41 AM
I can understand it could make some men feel excluded and it's easy enough not to do so great! Glad you brought it to everyone's attention Fingolphin!

Belisarius
March 4th, 2011, 02:43 AM
Just a little something that's kind of annoyed me for a while. So many posts here begin as or are titled something like, "Okay ladies..." or, "let me know what you think, ladies," or something similar. Now of course it's a no brainer if it's about bras or menstrual issues or whatever. I'm not talking about that. Most of them are about hair, and it's like it is assumed that men here automatically wouldn't care anything about it, or like we don't exist. Obviously, on the whole, more women than men have long hair. I'm not mad at anyone or anything like that. Just please remember, everyone, that there are guys here, too, who are also trying to care for their hair. :D
Well, I don't mind. I think it is kinda fun.

Marianne
March 4th, 2011, 03:08 AM
Ah, turning male privilege on its head for a brief moment.

*shrug*

It bothers me not at all.

Glad I'm not the only one who thought that.

hanne jensen
March 4th, 2011, 03:17 AM
Fingolphin, you're so right! This is why I usually use the term folks. And if you have noticed some of my posts at the Order of the Long Haired Knights thread, I always begin "My fellow Knights".

Maybe if the male members posted more? I know that I would really appreciate hair advice from the long haired male members as they all have hair to die for.

pepperminttea
March 4th, 2011, 04:14 AM
This continually gets brought up. Women are the majority here and it's often just a turn of phrase, kind of like how "hey guys!" is a greeting that can address a group of mixed genders. I don't think anyone is meaning to exclude the men of this community.

Agreed. I definitely use "guys" as a unisex phrase, and I tend to only use "ladies" when I'm talking about older women, who are from an era where ladies/gentlemen (as opposed to women/men) was the norm. I'm happy to see replies in a thread regardless of the gender of the poster. :shrug:

julliams
March 4th, 2011, 04:31 AM
My latest post started "hey guys". I use it to address anyone I'm talking to, be they male or female. Comes from being a teacher where saying "boys and girls" gets old.

neon-dream
March 4th, 2011, 04:34 AM
I've noticed this a lot too, it does seem slightly unfair because I wouldn't like it done if it was the other way around. I totally see where you are coming from :)

elbow chic
March 4th, 2011, 07:09 AM
Hey, just learn to think of "ladies" as a gender-neutral term like "guys" or the gender-neutral "he."

Takes some doing but I've got faith in ya.

ooo
March 4th, 2011, 07:37 AM
And now, a message from Pyvsi's Evil Twin:

"Hey, you invisible, slighted men in a woman's world. How does it feel? Huh? HUH?"

That is all.


I was thinking the same thing :D



Hey, just learn to think of "ladies" as a gender-neutral term like "guys" or the gender-neutral "he."

Takes some doing but I've got faith in ya.

good one :)

selderon
March 4th, 2011, 09:37 AM
Long haired men? Cool! :D Long haired men are a rare breed where I live. Most of them simply grow their hair and beards long, but make no apparent attempt to care for it beyond basic hygiene.

Imagine my surprise and delight to encounter the following:
1) A young man with the most beautiful, shiny chestnut hair. Shoulder-length (which isn't long by LHC standards). I'm afraid I stared a bit.
2) A middle-aged man with wavy classic length hair, obviously well-cared for.

I can hardly wait till I'm allowed to see pictures and get to know everyone. :)

Paranda Belle
March 4th, 2011, 10:09 AM
I shall keep this in mind if I feel the need to start a thread. I think using "hi people" should cover it.

Being Sikh I know alot of guys who have long hair for religious reasons. Problem is that most of them don't take very good care of it at all and it ends up being a pain to them, when it could be so simple. For example my cousin rarely washes his hair - every 3 months is his usual time between washes which is beyond benign neglect in my book. And when he does wash he uses harsh shampoos and blowfries. Plus he ties his topknot really tight and so suffers from major thinning at the temples. I would direct him and other sikh men here, but he's far too lazy! Especially as wearing a turban means noone really notices how shiny it is!

Gemma
March 4th, 2011, 12:58 PM
Ah, turning male privilege on its head for a brief moment.

*shrug*

It bothers me not at all.

LOVE this comment. Thanks for saying it!

In2wishin
March 4th, 2011, 01:07 PM
Your point is well taken, sir;)

sunnyhope
March 4th, 2011, 02:08 PM
Yes, men are invisible and all hairdressers are evil, happens frequently around here........


:rolleyes:
Does that mean I am evil then?

Nightshade
March 4th, 2011, 02:14 PM
Ah, turning male privilege on its head for a brief moment.

*shrug*

It bothers me not at all.

I admit it, this made me smile.

LHC is an inverted microcosm in that sense. But props to the guys for taking it in stride.

slz
March 4th, 2011, 06:11 PM
It bothers me not at all.
Great for you, however, sexism is sexism, whichever way it goes. I think if we feel offended by it one way, we should be offended the other way, too, or become guilty of the same offense (if this does mean anything at all ><).
Anyway, I do not read anything calling for "girls" or "ladies" - not being girly in the least, and being quite far removed from ladylike, too :D.

Red_Wednesday
March 4th, 2011, 06:36 PM
Just a little something that's kind of annoyed me for a while. So many posts here begin as or are titled something like, "Okay ladies..." or, "let me know what you think, ladies," or something similar. Now of course it's a no brainer if it's about bras or menstrual issues or whatever. I'm not talking about that. Most of them are about hair, and it's like it is assumed that men here automatically wouldn't care anything about it, or like we don't exist. Obviously, on the whole, more women than men have long hair. I'm not mad at anyone or anything like that. Just please remember, everyone, that there are guys here, too, who are also trying to care for their hair. :D

Point well taken!! Note to self: Do not forget the guys... *processing*... Got it!!:flowers:

saintleaken
March 4th, 2011, 07:39 PM
I've been a member for a monthortwo? reading and learning but feeling like a pervert on the outer cos i'm a guy. I now know I've got waist length fairytale ends but haven't remembered the numbers for fine hair slightly curly,on the low end of normal .....I'll go back and look it up and update my profile

1953Diygal
March 4th, 2011, 07:46 PM
I just wanted to add that my boyfriend had long hair when we met. He was the one who kept my hair braided and washed and cared for when I was laid up and he was the one who was so talented at dying my hair black and red. As a matter of fact, he dyed his OWN hair in a leopard print pattern this winter before we went to Denver to see the Warlock Pinchers. Matt is a total Hair Guy and he's, well.....a guy! He's had his hair braided, dreaded, long, short, shaved, mohawked, what have you....and he's done it all himself!

p.s.
And he LOVES Oyin Burnt Sugar pomade!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lacefrost
March 4th, 2011, 09:38 PM
i love guys that are here . guys guys guys.. i wish it was ALL guys. haha

Word. :cheese:

Dragon
March 4th, 2011, 09:54 PM
I have noticed this to. I think it’s a great reminder. It’s always good to hear from use guys :)

McFearless
March 4th, 2011, 11:39 PM
I've been a member for a monthortwo? reading and learning but feeling like a pervert on the outer cos i'm a guy. I now know I've got waist length fairytale ends but haven't remembered the numbers for fine hair slightly curly,on the low end of normal .....I'll go back and look it up and update my profile

I think thats crazy. Guys can have any hair they please and caring about your hair doesn't make you a perv at all! That is a very serious word.

Fingolphin
March 5th, 2011, 12:14 AM
I think thats crazy. Guys can have any hair they please and caring about your hair doesn't make you a perv at all! That is a very serious word.

Hmmm....I think what he probably meant was he felt like kind of an outsider because he didn't see much acknowledgement of men here, I guess, and so felt like a "perv" or outsider looking in who shouldn't be here or something?

saintleaken
March 5th, 2011, 06:45 AM
"outsider looking in who shouldn't be here or something?"
__________________yes thats what i meant thanks Fingolphin
pleased to be learning but not belonging yet

SwordWomanRiona
March 5th, 2011, 07:13 AM
I agree with you, Fingolphin. As a feminist who wishes for equality in all things, you won't get that from me!

Nae
March 5th, 2011, 07:40 AM
:rolleyes:
Does that mean I am evil then?

Nah, that was a definate tongue-in-cheek comment by our Ultrabella.;) She is a hairdresser herself, owns a couple salons if I remember correctly. The idea is that the men get called ladies and there are a TON of threads complaining about hairdressers.

Just a little reminder that our men aren't ladies and our hairdressers aren't evil. We should keep both facts in mind while we are posting.

EdG
March 5th, 2011, 07:53 AM
Guy here. :)

I too noticed the "ladies only" threads. I wasn't quite as annoyed as you were, Fingolphin. I was more annoyed by a recent plan for a "ladies only" meet. That runs counter to the ideal of promoting long hair on both men and women.

Posts on the board are pretty much always well-mannered, but on occasion I see a post that flunks the gender reversal test: a woman's comment about a man is perceived as funny, but if a man were to make the same comment about a woman, it would be seen as inappropriate. Whenever I read such a post, I can almost hear my former girlfriend exclaiming "double standard!"

I've never felt that men are ignored here. I actually feel quite the opposite: the 10% of the board members who are men get a lot of attention from the 90% who are women. I'm not complaining. :cloud9:
Ed

humble_knight
March 5th, 2011, 08:10 AM
Blokey-bloke here, also :)

Whereas I empathise with the menfolk who feel sidelined sometimes, I also understand, and don't mind, when most threads are addressed to females. I already use a different long-hair forum, which is female-dominated, so I didn't expect LHC to be any different. I still enjoy both forums :)

Fingolphin
March 5th, 2011, 09:13 AM
Please don't think that I was irate about the subject or anything. I'm not saying men are ignored here at all. When I said "annoying," I meant more like the kind of annoying that a gnat is when it's buzzing around your face. Not like the little yippy dog next door barking all day long and into the night. :) I just see it as a courtesy issue, like holding the door for the person behind you, whether they are male or female.

Sanyia
March 5th, 2011, 10:21 AM
You know, I have to admit that sometimes I am guilty of saying "the ladies recommend.." when I talk about treatments I saw here. But I also say "there's lots of guys, too!" when my sweetie asks me if said treatments would be appropriate for him. (He likes SMTs)

Wanderer09
March 5th, 2011, 10:26 AM
I'm sure I've said something like it in threads I've started. It's an easy slip to make when women are indeed the majority on a forum. ;)

Lots of love to our extraordinary LHGs!

queenofnight
September 27th, 2011, 04:05 PM
I've just joined but already noticed this. My boyfriend was actually pretty shocked (He wouldn't join but has long hair) to see men on this forum. I just think, It's unexpected.

CaityBear
September 27th, 2011, 04:11 PM
I try to stay away from using labels such as ladies or girls. I actually use guy a lot more. If I'm talking about a group of friends I'll say like "you guys" even though none of them are guys. I just use guys more than anything else...but I don't usually post labeling a gender (unless it is like TOM stuff or girlie talk just warning the guys in case they don't feel like reading it lol)

julierockhead
September 27th, 2011, 04:19 PM
And now, a message from Pyvsi's Evil Twin:
"Hey, you invisible, slighted men in a woman's world. How does it feel? Huh? HUH?"


Really. Try getting overlooked and forgotten at school...in the job market...sports...politics...literature...history etc., etc., etc.
I think we all *intimately* understand your feelings. But "all men are created equal", even if our language doesn't reflect that. I will try very hard to include the long haired men in my thinking and discussion.

wooliswonderful
September 27th, 2011, 04:23 PM
Having been with a long-haired guy for almost 20 years I'm mindful and appreciative of their presence. :)

HairFaerie
September 27th, 2011, 04:28 PM
It's like I'm on a nature documentary. "If you look in this thread here, you'll see the OP is, in fact, an LHG. The LHG, or long-haired gentleman, is a rare and valued specimen in the Long Hair World." ^_~

Why did I read that in my head with an Australian accent?!? :eek:

wooliswonderful
September 27th, 2011, 04:33 PM
Why did I read that in my head with an Australian accent?!? :eek:
Heehee! You too? :D

Navydoc_76
September 27th, 2011, 05:07 PM
i'll say that on behalf of us ladies, we LOVE having the men here! i only wish there were more! lol..i will say sometimes its a little confusing with only the backs of heads in profiles and in pics, its hard to sometimes tell who is female, who is male lol.. so thats why i never specify either sex.

EdG
September 27th, 2011, 08:24 PM
I've just joined but already noticed this. My boyfriend was actually pretty shocked (He wouldn't join but has long hair) to see men on this forum. I just think, It's unexpected.That's part of the genius of LHC.

LHC is possibly the earliest Internet board (that I'm aware of) intended for long hair on both men and women. :)
Ed

Eire
September 27th, 2011, 08:31 PM
Really. Try getting overlooked and forgotten at school...in the job market...sports...politics...literature...history etc., etc., etc.
I think we all *intimately* understand your feelings. But "all men are created equal", even if our language doesn't reflect that. I will try very hard to include the long haired men in my thinking and discussion.

Seconded. Just think about the common phrases in our culture. The casual "What's up, man?" vs "What's up, girl?" Because men are MEN and women are just GIRLS. Or even the plural, "Hey, guys." Guys? Excuse me, not all of us are guys.

So yeah, I guess guys might get overlooked here now and then, but most people who grow their hair long and do elaborate up-dos are women, so I guess it makes sense to assume that most people reading the posts are women. When I write a post, I don't necessarily address it to women, but about 98&#37; of responses are from women, and that's on my mind while writing.

In the real world, the ratio is much closer to 50/50, and yet the male-oriented mindset certainly dominates. At least here there is a logical reason behind the trend.

archel
September 27th, 2011, 08:34 PM
Mmmmm, long haired gentlemen.

Wait, what?

MinderMutsig
September 27th, 2011, 09:22 PM
Seconded. Just think about the common phrases in our culture. The casual "What's up, man?" vs "What's up, girl?" Because men are MEN and women are just GIRLS. Or even the plural, "Hey, guys." Guys? Excuse me, not all of us are guys.

So yeah, I guess guys might get overlooked here now and then, but most people who grow their hair long and do elaborate up-dos are women, so I guess it makes sense to assume that most people reading the posts are women. When I write a post, I don't necessarily address it to women, but about 98% of responses are from women, and that's on my mind while writing.

In the real world, the ratio is much closer to 50/50, and yet the male-oriented mindset certainly dominates. At least here there is a logical reason behind the trend.
Preach!

I'm quite offended when I'm referred to as a guy. I'm not a man and that is not a gender neutral term. I'm also not a girl. I'm a grown woman.

I can understand the OP is bugged by it which is why I use more neutral words like "hi all" or "hi people" but deep down I think it's a bit ridiculous to be offended or annoyed when being referred to as "ladies" when women are expected to just accept being referred to as "guys". Cause you know, you're a crazy man-hating baby-eating feminist if you don't. :rolleyes:

Rybe
September 27th, 2011, 09:41 PM
How bout if we combine them? Then we get invisible hairdressers!!!;) SCARY!

Mmyeess, and they'll sneak up behind people with flat irons and hairspray!! :shocked:

But yeah, given the majority of the forum is women I don't blame people for forgetting to address the dudes. As someone married to a long haired man, I certainly don't forget LHG exist :) But on the other hand I'd never come to him asking how to do a french twist...He'd just look at me funny. Not that there are no LHG who know how to do it! After all, I was taught by a guy how to put on eyeliner :D Still, I can understand the train of thought.

I also recently learned my hubbie knows more about braiding than me. Stupid boyscouts :p

None the less, something to keep in mind.

KwaveT
September 27th, 2011, 09:50 PM
Seconded. Just think about the common phrases in our culture. The casual "What's up, man?" vs "What's up, girl?" Because men are MEN and women are just GIRLS. Or even the plural, "Hey, guys." Guys? Excuse me, not all of us are guys.

I work on the front end department of my Wal-Mart. I am a cashier. About 95% of cashiers are women. All of the Customer Service Managers (CSMs) are women. Both my zone manager and assistant manager of my department are women. Last two groups are my hourly supervisors and salaried managers. I guess you could say I am working with and taking orders from women all day long.:D Needless to say I get to hear a lot of girl talk. If women take offense to being called just GIRLS, then y'all sure as heck address each other that way constantly. I almost never hear women addressing each other as woman. Some women will get offended if men refer to them as "girl". Something has to give there especially if I am engaging you at that level. I am the type of guy depending on the subject will jump right into the girl talk and participate right along with them.

kamikaze hair
September 27th, 2011, 09:57 PM
hair faerie, did you happen to read the thread about the wild weave, where one of our LHCers was on the beach and was showing us a weave in its "natural habitat" and then someone else posted, something like "it works imagining this with an Australian accent, steve Irwin style" anyway. I SO thought of it in an Australian accent as well, both this thread plus the other wild weave thread. But then again, I am Australian... :D

Anyway... I also noticed the whole, "ladies" thing when joining but I think (I hope) i haven't as of yet done this myself. I also agree that i do not think anyone here would have meant it on purpose as a tool to exclude anyone. In real life I usually just greet people with a "Hi" and thats it, if its a close friend then I might say "Hey dude" whether they are female or male. And oddly enough I am known to greet a group of only females as "Gentlemen...<while smoking an imaginary cigar> and a group of only males as "ladies <while taking off my imaginary hat to them> Its just the way I roll. Not at all meant to purposely exclude or make anyone feel uncomfortable. :cheese:

Brotherewolf
September 27th, 2011, 10:32 PM
I always like to say Ladies & Gentlemen, I'm aware of many awesome long-haired gentlemen here :)

Sounds good to me .. I am new and browsing I found few men posting
personally I don't really care how the thread starts
and it's understandable since the majority on the members are indeed ladies , if there was a larger male presence it would probably be different

Pierre
September 27th, 2011, 11:12 PM
i'll say that on behalf of us ladies, we LOVE having the men here! i only wish there were more! lol..i will say sometimes its a little confusing with only the backs of heads in profiles and in pics, its hard to sometimes tell who is female, who is male lol.. so thats why i never specify either sex.
I just updated my avatar to a picture taken at the recent meet in Berkeley. (The old one was over three years old, my hair has grown a lot, and I became a Flexi fan since.) It does not show my face, but you can tell I'm a man because I braided my beard into it.

When I'm welcoming newcomers and it's appropriate to welcome someone in a Romance language, I always check the gender first.

longhairedlady
September 28th, 2011, 12:36 AM
Oh gee I hope i havent done this! If I have I am sorry and will try to make a point of not doing it! :)

WinterButterfly
September 28th, 2011, 01:42 AM
I noticed the hey ladies a lot. I figured that nobody really thought of it too much. Kind of like the video games I have played that only let you play as a male character even though it wouldn't mess up the story line to be female. Now that's aggrivating being called boy or sir for your whole game! So I suppose since it bugs me a bit that I try not to asume that all those who answermy post will be female.
And more guys should become long hairs. My husband used to have longer hair about apl. I cried when he had it cut off. It was this super thick wavy blond awesome hair. I miss it. I think most guys look better with long hair. But maybe that's just my childhood speaking up. My mom only ever dated men with long hair. I love the prince charming locks. Rapunzle and prince charming go together so well. And I have a soft spot for period pieces. And they almost always have some long haird guys in them. My favorite is orlando bloom as an elf. The character had the most perfect gorgous blond locks. (Drool). I'm gonna make my hubby grow his hair back out if I can! I miss it! I will always be pleased to see long hair on guys. Its just awesome!

IanB
September 28th, 2011, 01:52 AM
I guess we have to accept that the majority of longhairs are women, so the majority of posts are from women. But it's good to have a small stake in this community and , in general, the support of our female collegues.

freckles
September 28th, 2011, 02:07 AM
I work on the front end department of my Wal-Mart. I am a cashier. About 95% of cashiers are women. All of the Customer Service Managers (CSMs) are women. Both my zone manager and assistant manager of my department are women. Last two groups are my hourly supervisors and salaried managers. I guess you could say I am working with and taking orders from women all day long.:D Needless to say I get to hear a lot of girl talk. If women take offense to being called just GIRLS, then y'all sure as heck address each other that way constantly. I almost never hear women addressing each other as woman. Some women will get offended if men refer to them as "girl". Something has to give there especially if I am engaging you at that level. I am the type of guy depending on the subject will jump right into the girl talk and participate right along with them.

okay?

Some women get offended if they are referred to as "girl" [possibly only by men; possibly by anyone]. Some women refer to their female friends/peers/colleagues as "girl". I don't fully understand your post, but it seems to imply that these 2 statements are contradictory or confusing or something. Would you like to clarify?

Additionally, I'm pretty sure Eire is aware that few women address each other as "woman", and I think her point is how these ideas alter our [as a culture] language, [I]rather than : "I and all women are doing it correctly already, you and all men need to step it up" :lol: Of course women address each other as "girl". I even do it on occasion. ;) That doesn't make it not rooted in all kinds of problematic assumptions. :D

Pixie0763
September 28th, 2011, 06:59 AM
I am a self confessed short-haired newbie here; but sincerely appreciate the LHGs! They are a rare & wonderful breed, and I admire their dedication.

lapushka
September 28th, 2011, 10:34 AM
So yeah, I guess guys might get overlooked here now and then, but most people who grow their hair long and do elaborate up-dos are women, so I guess it makes sense to assume that most people reading the posts are women. When I write a post, I don't necessarily address it to women, but about 98% of responses are from women, and that's on my mind while writing.

In the real world, the ratio is much closer to 50/50, and yet the male-oriented mindset certainly dominates. At least here there is a logical reason behind the trend.

So true, think about how women feel in the real world most of the time. Still, I sympathize and get why the guys here might feel a little left out sometimes.

FrozenBritannia
September 28th, 2011, 11:07 AM
I don't often see the LHG's post, but I do remember they are there.. Did anyone ever come up with a moniker to address ALL LH folk???

Chromis
September 28th, 2011, 11:10 AM
I don't often see the LHG's post, but I do remember they are there.. Did anyone ever come up with a moniker to address ALL LH folk???

Fellow longhairs?

Eire
September 28th, 2011, 05:49 PM
I work on the front end department of my Wal-Mart. I am a cashier. About 95&#37; of cashiers are women. All of the Customer Service Managers (CSMs) are women. Both my zone manager and assistant manager of my department are women. Last two groups are my hourly supervisors and salaried managers. I guess you could say I am working with and taking orders from women all day long.:D Needless to say I get to hear a lot of girl talk. If women take offense to being called just GIRLS, then y'all sure as heck address each other that way constantly. I almost never hear women addressing each other as woman. Some women will get offended if men refer to them as "girl". Something has to give there especially if I am engaging you at that level. I am the type of guy depending on the subject will jump right into the girl talk and participate right along with them.

I guess my point was that society made the trend where men are men and women are girls, and that usually reflects cultural implications. Since that is indeed the norm, it is by definition unusual to say, "hey, woman," which is why you almost never hear it. The message I am trying to get across is that the gender equivalencies are not there. I personally do not address other women as "girl" so I guess I don't fit in with that generalization, but I don't get offended at being addressed in that way, since the implication is friendly, not demeaning. I just find it interesting that the friendly/casual version for guys is "men" while the corollary for girls is, well... "girls." And, of course, that plural people (even if only a few men are in the mix) automatically become "guys."

Maybe I am missing your point.


I noticed the hey ladies a lot. I figured that nobody really thought of it too much. Kind of like the video games I have played that only let you play as a male character even though it wouldn't mess up the story line to be female. Now that's aggrivating being called boy or sir for your whole game!

Agree! I was so excited back when Pokemon silver came out and I could actually be referred to as a "she" and not have all the female characters flirting with me :D

SilentGuardian
September 28th, 2011, 06:23 PM
It makes me happy when I see men posting here :)

Soniasonia
September 28th, 2011, 06:26 PM
i love guys that are here . guys guys guys.. i wish it was ALL guys. haha
I can toast to that!

KwaveT
September 28th, 2011, 07:00 PM
I guess my point was that society made the trend where men are men and women are girls, and that usually reflects cultural implications. Since that is indeed the norm, it is by definition unusual to say, "hey, woman," which is why you almost never hear it. The message I am trying to get across is that the gender equivalencies are not there. I personally do not address other women as "girl" so I guess I don't fit in with that generalization, but I don't get offended at being addressed in that way, since the implication is friendly, not demeaning. I just find it interesting that the friendly/casual version for guys is "men" while the corollary for girls is, well... "girls." And, of course, that plural people (even if only a few men are in the mix) automatically become "guys."

Maybe I am missing your point.



Agree! I was so excited back when Pokemon silver came out and I could actually be referred to as a "she" and not have all the female characters flirting with me :D

I was thinking you were using that "just girls" as a sort of negative implication. I am like if that bothers women then why do I hear them addressing each other as "girl" near constantly. It may depend on what part of the country you are in too. It is much different here in the triad (North Carolina) then it was in the central Georgia area where I was raised. You were just bringing up a general cultural issue.

On the video games issue, you see way too many games do this. It is laziness on the part of the developers for one. If they are going to give you the option of male/female character then text needs to be written gender appropriately. I always like playing as female character myself. I do this with my Dragon Quest games. There really isn't many female leads period in videogames. I like playing RPGs and about the only RPG I think I have ever seen an all female party with is Magic Knight Rayearth on the Sega Saturn.

freckles
September 30th, 2011, 06:15 AM
I was thinking you were using that "just girls" as a sort of negative implication. I am like if that bothers women then why do I hear them addressing each other as "girl" near constantly. It may depend on what part of the country you are in too. It is much different here in the triad (North Carolina) then it was in the central Georgia area where I was raised. You were just bringing up a general cultural issue.

yes but ... some women are bothered by being called "girl". Other women call each other "girl". The 'why' is very very obvious -- women are not a hive mind. :)