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Rocket22
February 7th, 2011, 10:22 AM
I have never been one to wear my hair up, I personally just don’t think I look very good with it up, but I love how it looks on other people just sophisticated and elegant. , But since joining LHC I’m really trying to do all the tips and tricks to get my hair to its healthiest. So lately I’ve been wearing it up every now and again. Now every time I do and run into someone that knows me of course they always mention how different I look. (never know if this is good or bad but kinda assume it’s not good) so yesterday I had freshly washed hair and after it dried I thought I will wear my hair up to be good and forget about it. (and not a messy do either) I had full makeup, was clean, wearing earrings, and I had someone once again say “oh I didn’t recognized you with your hair up". And then preceded to say something like well it’s Sunday so no need to get fancy.. Not exactly those words but that’s’ what I heard. :) So I’m just curious is up not for everyone? . Now this person was by no means being mean or spiteful or jealous or anything like that, are there some people that just shouldn’t wear their hair up ? Now to most peoples credit I have blonde hair and when worn up it looks quit dark, which I do understand that is different than people are accustomed to? But I now have a little tiny complex

Lemur_Catta
February 7th, 2011, 10:28 AM
Well I think that's because for most people, wearing hair up = some kind of messy bun with an elastic. And they wear hair up mainly because they are busy or they are having a bad hair day, not for protection or because they love updos. They don't recognize the effort we put in making different kinds of braids and buns, because they don't even know someone can do elaborate hairstyles without going to the hairstylist.
Don't worry about your appearance! I am sure you look beautiful both with your hair up and down.

Xandergrammy
February 7th, 2011, 10:45 AM
I think I'm the exact opposite of you- People know I am "dressed" and ready to work or whatever when my hair is up (it never starts out "messy"). When it's down, most people know it's wash day. I feel more "finished" when my hair is up and out of the way. I think it's a matter of how people are used to seeing you.

spidermom
February 7th, 2011, 10:50 AM
Opinions are like armpits - we all have them, and a lot of them stink. Don't get all wound up over somebody else's armpits.

linnepinne
February 7th, 2011, 10:54 AM
I too think that people react only because they're not used to seeing you with your hair up! And I also think what you said about your blonde hair looking darker when it's up is correct. You should see this as a very good thing :) That your hair is very versatile and that you can get many diffrent looks with your colour and length. I'm sure up or down is equally beautifull!
Keep on experimenting with different styles! Both you and the people around you will get used to it and appreciate it.

Dina L.
February 7th, 2011, 10:59 AM
I know somebody with waist-length hair but she usually wears it in a ponytail or half-up. She wears her hair down about once a month and in my opinion it doesn't look good at all for her because of her face structure.

If I were you I would ask my friends what they exactly mean when saying "you look different".

Rocket22
February 7th, 2011, 11:02 AM
Haha you guys are funny and have great points. Im normally not one to worry about what ANYONE thinks but guess when you try something new, that your not very confident about anyways, just makes you wonder if maybe it's just not for you. I know it's all about what people are used to, and I'm not even used to me with my hair up :) but just when I think it looks kinda good, I get the "I didn't recognize you" line. I personally think it's more about the dark hair than it up.. (it's pretty dark up) and everyone is just used to me being lighter, but they just better get used to the darker because it's staying :)

krissykins
February 7th, 2011, 11:59 AM
Maybe they just have a personal preference for you wearing your hair down?

ddiana1979
February 7th, 2011, 12:12 PM
You really just can't win with people. My maternal grandmother always said my hair looked frowzy when it was down, and so I should put it up in a neat bun or French twist. My mother, on the other hand, hates my hair up, and thinks it should be completely down or with just the sides pulled back into a half up. I just learned to ignore them both, and do what I want.

Thank goodness my fiancé doesn't care what I do with my hair as long as it stays dark (I'm a natural medium-dark brunette). I'm so tired of people trying to make me change my hair to suit their own preferences.

Rocket22
February 7th, 2011, 12:25 PM
You really just can't win with people. My maternal grandmother always said my hair looked frowzy when it was down, and so I should put it up in a neat bun or French twist. My mother, on the other hand, hates my hair up, and thinks it should be completely down or with just the sides pulled back into a half up. I just learned to ignore them both, and do what I want.

Thank goodness my fiancé doesn't care what I do with my hair as long as it stays dark (I'm a natural medium-dark brunette). I'm so tired of people trying to make me change my hair to suit their own preferences.


Nope you sure can't win with everyone! not that I want to.. Heck most people like my hair shorter (not short but BSL) and I'm hair crazy and gonna have it long I don't care if not one person likes it I do!

One thing I have learned from all my experiences is if they are happy then I'm happy and unless someone asks I'll keep my opinions to myself :)

torrilin
February 7th, 2011, 12:44 PM
And then preceded to say something like well it’s Sunday so no need to get fancy..

That's pretty much the opposite of lazy now, isn't it?

That's also exactly why I wear my hair up. I *like* feeling pretty and having hair that looks nice. I don't feel nice with my hair down, since it's fine, floaty and flyaway. It gets into my eyes and nose, and gets caught on my glasses and just eeew. Not fun. A nice updo means I get to enjoy my long hair.

(short doesn't make it better. short makes it worse, which is why I can't understand the people who insist that an updo is just like short hair.)

Rocket22
February 7th, 2011, 12:55 PM
That's pretty much the opposite of lazy now, isn't it?



haha I had to read this like five times to get what you meant :) maybe I didn't explain that very well what she implied was it was ok to wear it up because it's Sunday and a lazy day just hanging around... but heck maybe it was more what you thought? now I'm soooo confused. so conversation went
her: didn't recognize you with your hair up
Me: oh really, yeah don't wear it up very much
her: well that's ok it's just Sunday anyways

not word for word but kinda like that :)

It's really not a big deal just kinda funny when you change things up a bit how everyone has an opinion

Lianna
February 7th, 2011, 01:01 PM
I think it depends. Some hair can look messy/flyaway down, or just while drying and then settles (my case). That's why I don't like to leave the house with hair air drying loose. I think some neat updos look great on various people, but not on me, yet. I can do some, but my chubby face asks for messier at this length/size of buns. If I could do BIG neat buns, I think it would look nicer than my current messy ones. Big face needs big updo!

A neat updo doesn't look lazy at all to me, neither all messy ones. Today I was well dressed, hair slicked back lightly gelled (no flyaways all around), with a medium sized messy bun, just like this (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/album.php?albumid=7001&pictureid=94875). I don't think I looked lazy, even though it was a messy bun. I can't help it if that's my best look for the moment, or sock bun. But I don't wear sticks with sock buns, so I rather go with the messy one.

Yozhik
February 7th, 2011, 01:32 PM
I went and looked in your albums, but I didn't find any photos of you with your hair up. I can't imagine from the photos I did see, though, that you wouldn't look great with it up. :)

Maybe you could post some and we could refute what your acquaintances are saying?

In any case, your hair looks great, and the roots are a very pretty color. :flower:

Sheltie_Momma
February 7th, 2011, 01:43 PM
Was she even lookin' at the back? Because mainstream people think that a bun = little effort, so I think she was probably putting her own behavior into her assumption that hair being up = simple, quick, throw it up hair because maybe that's her frame of reference. We know better around here which is why so many avatar's are from behind, you know,where the hair is! :)

jaine
February 7th, 2011, 01:56 PM
I think her comment sounds like she was implying updo=fancy, not down=fancy ... but I should also add sometimes I have trouble telling if people are joking or serious, even in person. But it definitely is ambiguously worded.

lapushka
February 7th, 2011, 02:11 PM
Maybe she just equals hair that's up to dirty hair, that's all. Apart from that, I agree with what spidermom said. :)

milagro
February 7th, 2011, 02:21 PM
Was she even lookin' at the back? Because mainstream people think that a bun = little effort, so I think she was probably putting her own behavior into her assumption that hair being up = simple, quick, throw it up hair because maybe that's her frame of reference. We know better around here which is why so many avatar's are from behind, you know,where the hair is! :)
I agree. People always judge by themselves :) Some people think not straitened hair is lazy, or no make-up, or flats... all depending what they think necessary for themselves.

Rocket22
February 7th, 2011, 02:49 PM
I went and looked in your albums, but I didn't find any photos of you with your hair up. I can't imagine from the photos I did see, though, that you wouldn't look great with it up. :)

Maybe you could post some and we could refute what your acquaintances are saying?

In any case, your hair looks great, and the roots are a very pretty color. :flower:

Awe Thank you!

haha no photos of hair up because I don’t have any, I don’t think I have ever put my entire head of hair up, when getting dressed up and going out , but I do wear it at home like that lately (I don't feel pretty with hair up) That’s a shame to because I do love the look on other people. I have done half up many many times and love that. My BF says (when I had my long extensions in) that I had a funny habit of hiding behind my hair. (like I would pull It forward all the time) so wearing it up is just different for me and for others too and maybe they sense a little bit of my un-comfortableness who knows but for sure everyone says something, but I'll get better with it and so will they and maybe looking different is not a bad thing :)

ibleedlipstick
February 7th, 2011, 03:27 PM
I think it depends on what hair up means to you to some, it means dirty ponytail or messy bun that is lopsided and wasn't combed beforehand, and to others it is a sleek french twist or something of the sort.

I think that most of the time, hair looks mad elegant. Don't worry about it! I think they just haven't had a chance to get used to the difference. When I first dyed my hair black, people were shocked and told me it looked weird or goth. Now, I get lots of compliments. It just takes a while for people to get used to the chance we get used to people fitting into our little mental box, and when someone mixes things up, we don't know what to do about it! It just takes some people longer to adjust.

skaempfer
February 7th, 2011, 10:24 PM
Like many others have said, I think there was some projecting going on here. I don't know what kind of hair your friend has, but she is perhaps a person who would only put it up if it were dirty or having a bad hair day. The idea of putting it in a bun or other complicated arrangement on purpose has sort of fallen by the wayside in the last 90 years or so, because few people have had hair long enough for anything but a pony tail. Updos are a lost art form that people don't know where to file, so they file it with 'bad hair day =pony tail.'

In other words, it's her, not you. If it happens again just laugh and say thanks for the flowers :D

Degu
February 7th, 2011, 10:31 PM
I used to HATE having my hair up. But then it started getting longer and longer, and now I hate having it down; It's everywhere! I don't understand people with extensions. :P I always toss it up in a bun or with a clip. I don't spend any time on styling because that is just not me.

fluffybunny
February 7th, 2011, 10:45 PM
Let's remember that LHC hair practices are not, er, typical. They typical style nowadays is all in the elaborate cut, color, and is worn blow dried, heat straighted or heat waved or heat curled, and with some kind of styling goo for shine and/or holding. If you go to all that bother, you're not going to want to hide it in a bun or braid. So fancy and done equals down. Bad hair day equals hidden away in a pony or messy claw-clip updo. Even on red carpet events nowadays "down" hair is getting as common as updos-- anybody else notice that?

So for LHC folks with natural hair, perhaps some henna for color, the dichotomy is reversed. Down equals unadorned, and adorned = braids or updos.

McFearless
February 7th, 2011, 11:32 PM
If the person said "no reason to be all fancy" than you most definately do not look lazy. You say updos looks sophisticated and elegant on other people but I think fancy is another way you describe that. So you've nailed it :)

Mesmerise
February 8th, 2011, 12:25 AM
I often wear my hair up to keep it out of the way... but most of the time I've got 20 second hairdos lol. So yeah, for me I guess it looks lazy... but nobody's ever commented!

I usually prefer my hair down, but lately it looks stringy due to shedding so I wear it up...

share801
February 8th, 2011, 12:46 AM
When I was in college, for the 8 o'clock classes most women had pony tails and most guys had hats. Maybe the person who said it puts *her* hair up for such reasons?

Taur5684
February 8th, 2011, 04:40 AM
Sounds to me more like the person was unaccustomed to seeing you with your hair up. What I mean is....think about when you see a person not wearing glasses, but they normally *do* wear glasses. They look somehow wrong, don't they? It's not that they look bad without glasses, or that some people should or shouldn't wear glasses, it's just not what you're used to seeing with that particular person.
I think hair is the same way. For the most part :-)