i just looked in the mirror...what an awful sight

[yellowflower]

I just looked at my hair in the mirror, last night i left a conditioning treatment and oil in.

It looks so horrible orange and brassy its awful and so short and looks so disgusting!!!!

I told the damn hairdressers would it go orange and they said no, i damn well has!!! Its just such a horrible mess.

Its days like today that i think screw dying it and just shave it all off. Think I may stay in bed the whole day, whats the point of even getting up to go out when you look like rubbish and you know you look like ruubish

[LovelyL]

Go show the damn hairdressers what they did! Will it fade?

[yellowflower]

I have showed them, they are washing their hands of it as i seen my old hairdresser who out some blonde in it to tone down the orange, and now they say because i went somewhere else it hasnt got anything to do with them....even the orange bits are EVERYTHING to do with them

[milagro]

Wash it, rinse with purple toner, tuck it under headband or make a pony and FORGET ABOUT IT. Believe me, people don't pay as much attention to other people's hair color as you think. Why, some people dye their hair brassy voluntarily! :)
Also, oils can strip clor especially temporary dyes.
And seriously, no offense or judgment, and I understand your being unhappy with brassiness but you need to cheer up and be rational or seek professional help for your anxiety/depression. Don't let it rule your life.
Friendly hug to you and please get out of bed :grouphug:

[WynneWear]

Agree completely with the reply above by milagro. Don't let it get to you so much as it's just so very unhealthy. Think of the good things in your life; work on your hobbies. If you don't have any hobbies, think of what you might do: Jewelry, hair sticks, sewing, learn a new embroidery technique like silk ribbon embroidery, or do crazy quilting.

Remember also that you didn't like it when it was darker so consider not darkening it either.

[vanity_acefake]

Ok calm down.
Is there a Sally's near you? If so go and as milagro suggests and get a purple toner. Talk to the staff there. They will explain to you exactly how to mix it, apply it, how long to leave it on etc. If not then go to superdrug and get the blue/purple shampoo and conditioner I and many others here have suggested and wash/condition your hair.
Listen to the help offered here.
Many many of us have done this and know what we are talking about.
Be proactive not reactive.

[Fufu]

Im not sure if you have come across these links elow.

http://www.ehow.com/how_2187081_prevent-brassy-blonde-hair.html

http://www.blonde-ambition.co.uk/page7.shtml

http://beyondjane.com/beauty/hair/how-to-treat-brassy-blonde-hair/

[yellowflower]

I spoke to a different hairdresser yesterday and she said not to bother using the purple shampoo and to go darker instead.

I feel like staying in bed is much better option than having to face the world looking a complete mess. I dont want to go and see a doctor, it sounds silly saying to them i am depressed about my hair, they could give you pills but that isnt really going to change my hair is it? Is not going to get rid of the brassyness.


Im not sure if you have come across these links elow.

http://www.ehow.com/how_2187081_prevent-brassy-blonde-hair.html

http://www.blonde-ambition.co.uk/page7.shtml

http://beyondjane.com/beauty/hair/how-to-treat-brassy-blonde-hair/

Thanks i have read those before the blue malva was the conditioner i was going to get but the hairdresser said not to bother, to just dye it darker

[milagro]

I spoke to a different hairdresser yesterday and she said not to bother using the purple shampoo and to go darker instead.

I feel like staying in bed is much better option than having to face the world looking a complete mess. I dont want to go and see a doctor, it sounds silly saying to them i am depressed about my hair, they could give you pills but that isnt really going to change my hair is it? Is not going to get rid of the brassyness.
Missing your life because of the rather ordinary hair color is not a better option. Are you going to hide from the world if you have a zit, too?
Please listen to what so many people here and very probably in real life, have told you - you are not your hair and nobody in their good sense is gonna be disgusted by a mere yellowish hair if that bothers you at all. You are obsessed and need to cope with this, not only brassiness which is obviously a minor problem.
You have a lot of sympathy here but it's all up to you.

[hanne jensen]

Um... Do you really trust a hairdresser after this traumatic experience? Believe it or not, LHC senior members actually know MORE about hair care than any hairdresser.

Is it cold now where you live? If so, you could wear a hat or hoody. If it's warmer, you could always put on a pretty scarf.

Please, yellowflower, get out of bed and cover your hair and take a nice long walk. Depression ruins the health of the hair. Before you know it, the brassiness will fade. Trust me, it will. In 6 months you will be able to laugh at this incident while mumbling to yourself "never again!"

[vanity_acefake]

Why on earth would you consider dying it darker when you say you hated your hair when you dyed it darker before.
Then you would hate it because it was dark.
Get the blue/purple shampoo and conditioner we all advised you to get.
I know our hair seems like a huge part of our identity but it is not us.
There are people on this forum with who are battling cancer who are having to undergo horrendous medical procedures that make their hair fall out. They are not on on here bemoaning the loss of their hair and identity. Only asking for healing prayers and thoughts. There are people on this forum with alopecia who are either going through the trauma of losing their hair or have lost all their hair. They are posting the positive happenings of hair beginning to grow back or a tip that they have discovered that seems to be helping so other alopecia sufferers may benefit.
I suffer from crippling depression. I am on medication for it as without it I cannot cope. I understand where you are coming from. I know how I can obsess over my appearance. I totally sympathise with you as i too have had bleached brassy hair. But I listened to other peoples suggestions as to how they got rid of the brassy colour and I used their advice to fix the problem.
Staying at home is not going to fix this.
Sorry if I come across as being incredibly harsh but you need to do something now to fix your hair so you can carry on with your life.
And going to see the doctor and asking for help if you are feeling like this all the time is a positive thing to do. Sometimes we cannot ignore feeling down all the time on our own and we need to be strong and ask for help.

[Maddy_T]

:(:(:(:(:( boy do i know how THAT feels......

Buuuuut, if I can get out of bed with 2" patchy, thin, bleached, half coppery, half big bird yellow hair, then you can get out of bed with brassy!!!!!. It could be worse!. Come on!. Put it up in a bun and wear a big headband, no one will even notice!. Nurse it back to health for a month or so and then go to a new HD and get the shade lifted and toned!.

[Kherome]

Bad hair isn't the end of the world. Its time to stop letting this rule your life. Get a nice hat or scarf and forget about the hair. This too shall pass.

[RadiantNeedle]

You have started numerous threads regarding how unhappy you are with your hair at present. I totally understand this, as I've been every colour of the rainbow including unwanted orange and yellow. I know how frustrating and devastating it can be to have something not work out the way you had hoped. You aren't stupid, it's not fate or bad karma, it's something that happens to a blindingly large amount of people...

But...

Staying in bed won't fix anything.
Starting thread after thread asking for advice and sympathy won't fix the issue for you unless you get up, get out, and get proactive using the advice you have been compassionately given.

I wouldn't say that the senior members here know more than any hairdresser because many members ARE hairdressers. There are people here with professional experience in hair colouring. Use them! Listen to them.

One reason that you could use the blue/purple toner shampoos, even though you're likely to go dark again when your hair is in better condition, is this; You will potentially have less brassiness and yellow to look at every day while you wait till your hair can withstand more vigorous colouring treatments.
In my opinion, doing that as well as babying your hair could give you more confidence and make you feel like you have control over your hair. Which, in fact, you do. You can make the choices.
You're making some of those choices regarding oiling right now! You can oil before you wash, you can seal in moisture with some oils after washing, you can wear protective updos if your hair is long enough, and you can disguise the colour with pretty scarves or wrap with ribbon. You have options. Even though it feels terrible right now, you cannot deny that you have things you CAN do.

You see that streak in my sig picture? That's practically bright yellow right now because I've been doing ACV and Rosemary rinses! I'm likely to dye my hair red at some point and cover it up, but in the meantime I'm enjoying the colour variance. And you know what? Yellow hair is SO in right now. Check out Lady Gaga some time ;)
Heck, if you're in a position to sport a whacky colour, dye it purple! I've had blue and purple streaks off and on over the last 12 years, and as the dye fades it puts that silvery blonde tone into your hair, even if it was orange or yellow to start with. Unless it's a light purple, you'd need to exercise some patience until it fades out, but then you are likely to be in for a path that requires patience, regardless of the choices you make.
What I mean by that is... Waiting until your hair is in better condition in order to colour it again will require patience.
Micro-trimming off damage in order to maintain and then increase length, whether you go lighter or darker, will require patience.
Shaving your head and then waiting for your hair to grow back will require LOADS of patience while you get through the numerous awkward stages.

Unless you shave your head you will likely need to do micro-trims to get rid of any bleaching damage. There are a LOT of members here who have done exactly that, gradually trimming off damage and colour. It can be done! You have a group here who will cheer you on and offer advice.
Make a plan, take a deep breath and go for it.
:flowers:

[Fethenwen]

Missing your life because of the rather ordinary hair color is not a better option. Are you going to hide from the world if you have a zit, too?
Please listen to what so many people here and very probably in real life, have told you - you are not your hair and nobody in their good sense is gonna be disgusted by a mere yellowish hair if that bothers you at all. You are obsessed and need to cope with this, not only brassiness which is obviously a minor problem.
You have a lot of sympathy here but it's all up to you.
I agree, and I don't think this problem of yours have so much to do with hair. Many people can walk around with even green hair and not liking it, but it's not a reason to get all depressed. It's just hair!

I had horrible grow out when I grew out my short hair, I looked like a troll with my hair loose. But these things are only temporary, hair changes.
When I have a bad hair day I put it up or even wrap it in a headscarf or use a beanie and forget about it.

Don't be too hard on yourself, you sound seriously depressed. I think you should try and seek some help :grouphug:
To me it sounds like you get too fixed with your appearance, and I don't think fixing your hair perfect is going to help that much with that.

[yellowflower]

Right as of Wednesday when i can get to the shops i will go back and get the shampoo to remove brassiness, to try and help the situation.

It just seems like everything is so rubbish the real reason behind my hair was i dyed it after an argument with my fiance who is now just my boyfriend, it led to the worse christmas and new year of my life. Having to deal with, that final exams, and i think i put my stress into my hair and take it out on that when real the underneath unhappiness is my relationship that fell apart.

[RadiantNeedle]

Right as of Wednesday when i can get to the shops i will go back and get the shampoo to remove brassiness, to try and help the situation.

It just seems like everything is so rubbish the real reason behind my hair was i dyed it after an argument with my fiance who is now just my boyfriend, it led to the worse christmas and new year of my life. Having to deal with, that final exams, and i think i put my stress into my hair and take it out on that when real the underneath unhappiness is my relationship that fell apart.
Figuring that out is a huge step towards being able to cope with your situation! You are not alone! Drastic hair changes during emotional upheaval are practically textbook!
Please, please please consider finding a counsellor. You sound like you desperately need someone to talk to and learn how to manage stress. I'm in the same boat; I have a very severe anxiety disorder and each day is a challenge. But I'm seeing a counsellor and a psychologist, both of whom are helping me sort through the things that are causing me so much stress. They're teaching me how cope when things get too much.

Remember to breathe. Be aware of your surroundings, how your body feels, the colours, smells and feelings around you. Step away from the mirror and sit somewhere quiet if you have to and centre yourself. Learning to manage your stress will assist you in every aspect of your life until the day you leave this world. It's tough, but you have the opportunity and power to make changes and grow, both hair-wise and psyche-wise.

[jaine]

What's wrong with shaving it? I think that's a workable solution if your hair is bothering you that much (after the 2-week rule of course). Lots of people on the shorties thread have done it to start fresh with virgin hair.

[yellowflower]

I think i desperatly wanted my old hair back, as it kind of reminded me of me and my relationship and how much i want that back, maybe wanting my old hair back is not what i want, maybe its wanting my old relationship back

[RadiantNeedle]

I wish I could go back in time as well, sometimes. But we can't. We can't have the old things again. We can only go forward.
But that means we can have even better things. Don't settle for your current relationship or pine for the old one, if you can help it. Work to make your current and future relationship even better than the one you miss right now.

[fairy_ends_girl]

Please post pics so we can help you.

[Anje]

Yellowflower,

Do you really think the people who know you are going to think you're an awful person because your hair is a lousy color right now?

I don't.


Do you really want to be friends with people who are going to dislike you or judge you by the brassiness of your hair?

Screw 'em. You are worth more than your haircolor, and if they can't see that, you're better off without them in your life.



Don't let the stupid stylists who keep messing up your hair win. Don't let them make you think that your value as a person somehow revolves around your hair. Because it doesn't. Hair is fun, and it's nice to make it fit with your mental image of yourself, but that doesn't mean that you're not a worthwhile person if your hair doesn't look how you think it should look.

Hiding in bed for the day will leave you with having to face this tomorrow, unchanged. So tuck it under a hat if you're too embarrassed to show it, and go do the stuff that you need to do today.

And consider buying a bottle of fluorescent pink hairdye. If you're stuck with a mess, you might as well make it look intentional and flaunt it, right?

[Wanderer09]

Agreed with fairy_ends_girl...can you post pics? I'm sure it doesn't look as bad as you think!

I think it's good that you're looking deeper into the situation, and getting to the root of why this is upsetting you so much. For many people it's not "just hair", but there is often some deep emotion associated with it. But at the end of the day, it will grow back. It may take a long time, but it will grow. I don't have a lot of experience with colour mishaps, but it sounds like you're doing everything you can to make the brassiness fade. :) In the meantime, try to distract yourself. Step away from the mirror and find things to do. A watched pot never boils. ;)

What's the shortest length you'd be comfortable with? As your roots start growing in, maybe you can cut to that length and maintain there. That way you'd have more of the dye gone in one shot, and it will take less time for your hair to be dye-free than if you kept it at your current length while growing out.

Hugs and best wishes!

[yellowflower]

Yellowflower,

Do you really think the people who know you are going to think you're an awful person because your hair is a lousy color right now?

I don't.


Do you really want to be friends with people who are going to dislike you or judge you by the brassiness of your hair?

Screw 'em. You are worth more than your haircolor, and if they can't see that, you're better off without them in your life.



Don't let the stupid stylists who keep messing up your hair win. Don't let them make you think that your value as a person somehow revolves around your hair. Because it doesn't. Hair is fun, and it's nice to make it fit with your mental image of yourself, but that doesn't mean that you're not a worthwhile person if your hair doesn't look how you think it should look.

Hiding in bed for the day will leave you with having to face this tomorrow, unchanged. So tuck it under a hat if you're too embarrassed to show it, and go do the stuff that you need to do today.

And consider buying a bottle of fluorescent pink hairdye. If you're stuck with a mess, you might as well make it look intentional and flaunt it, right?

i did get up and tried to do my essay. I am starting to feel abit better, I am better than what I was a month ago. I think it was a bad idea to go to that hairdresser's, i feel like it looks like a bush now, instead i am going to get my mum to cut my hair, little trims from now on, how hard can dusting the ends be.... At least then i wont have people telling me i should colour it this and that and how they can fix it. My partner tells me everyday how beautiful he thinks i look.

I am trying really hard to pull myself together i really am.

Do you even need to cut your hair to encourage it to grow??

Hairdressers keep saying you need to have it cut every 6 weeks, but is that even true??

[Fufu]

You have to keep telling yourself your hair will get better. This is the power of our mind. Whether we want to be positive or negative is how we tell and encourage ourselves.

For me, when my hair was ruined by bleach or got a nasty hair cut, I just chop my hair off to very short and got over them. It's no point feeling upset over something that had happened.

There's always light at the end of the tunnel. Everyone can tell you the same thing over and over again.
The most important thing is you have to convince yourself and believe in the light.

I am glad you are feeling better, keep it up :) Somtimes, we just have to ditch negative comments from some people and embrace the positive comments from the people who will stand by you no matter what happens.

I really will love to see your hair colour, please post a few pictures if you can.

[jojo]

Oh dear this is really getting you down. Have you thought anymore of trying the lush brun?

[luluj]

What's wrong with shaving it? I think that's a workable solution if your hair is bothering you that much (after the 2-week rule of course). Lots of people on the shorties thread have done it to start fresh with virgin hair.

THIS.........or wait until you have an inch of growth and then go for a "down to the wood chop." It's what I did (as you know). You could even buy a cute wig while waiting for your hair to grow in, you have MANY options available to you, please cheer up, this will soon be a distant memory!:blossom:

[Addy]

You know, if you were me and I was you... :D I'd just cut it all off a.k.a nice cute pixie and be done with the color fiasco!

But that's just me. ;)

[yellowflower]

You know, if you were me and I was you... :D I'd just cut it all off a.k.a nice cute pixie and be done with the color fiasco!

But that's just me. ;)

I am seriously contemplating this, the only probelm i have is my hair very curly im worried about what it would be like? As obv it would be more of a small afro...

i havent got any accurate pictures in natural light, my partner emailed me some but i cant save them to my computer for some reason??

how do you upload pictures?

[RadiantNeedle]

i did get up and tried to do my essay. I am starting to feel abit better, I am better than what I was a month ago. I think it was a bad idea to go to that hairdresser's, i feel like it looks like a bush now, instead i am going to get my mum to cut my hair, little trims from now on, how hard can dusting the ends be.... At least then i wont have people telling me i should colour it this and that and how they can fix it. My partner tells me everyday how beautiful he thinks i look.

I am trying really hard to pull myself together i really am.

Do you even need to cut your hair to encourage it to grow??

Hairdressers keep saying you need to have it cut every 6 weeks, but is that even true??

Nope, you don't HAVE to cut every 6 weeks if you want it to grow longer. Cutting doesn't make your hair grow. Hair just grows.
However, if you have damage and splits, the damage can extend up the shaft and you'll find breakage that thins out your ends as your hair unravels. Microtrims neaten up the ends and get rid of the worst of the damage a little bit at a time.
To quote Nightshade's fantastic article on Damaged Hair (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=79)...


To illustrate, let's picture your damage hair as a thick, dry rope. The end of that rope is frayed and starting to unravel. Lets say our rope is 10 feet long, and it's damaged along the lower 8 feet from sun and water. It gets less damaged as you go up, but still, the vast majority of this rope is in shoddy shape.

No matter where you cut on really damaged area, lets say the last 6 feet of the rope, the end is going to fray and unravel. It unravels at the same rate no matter if you cut 1 foot from the end, or 3 feet from the end.

This is why I advocate frequent micro-trims for damaged hair. In my case, I gauged how much my hair grew a month (half an inch) and trimmed half that (a quarter inch). By frequently dusting (another term for microtrimming in which the amount taken off is so slight that the trimmings on the floor look like dust), the ends of our hair stay as clean as possible. We could cut an inch, but the hair that we're cutting into is still damaged, and so it'll be split all to hell long before you grow your hair back to where it was before the trim. Clean ends tangle less, they break less, and for the first time in a long time, even though you're trimming, your hair may start "growing."

I feel that this is the root of where the “you need to trim to grow your hair” myth comes in. My hair didn’t “grow” until I started trimming because the ends were staying clean until the next trim and not damaging each other more.

She explains this far better than I ever could, and the entire article is fantastic.

[yellowflower]

Nope, you don't HAVE to cut every 6 weeks if you want it to grow longer. Cutting doesn't make your hair grow. Hair just grows.
However, if you have damage and splits, the damage can extend up the shaft and you'll find breakage that thins out your ends as your hair unravels. Microtrims neaten up the ends and get rid of the worst of the damage a little bit at a time.
To quote Nightshade's fantastic article on Damaged Hair (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=79)...



She explains this far better than I ever could, and the entire article is fantastic.

yes i was thinking about this article when getting my hair cut i was thinking whether i have an inch or half inch damage will travel up, maybe its best to only trim the ends every 6 weeks

ETA: how do you upload pictures?

[Addy]

imageshack or photobucket.

[yellowflower]

i added an avatar its more yellowing in some lights and addy i sent pic

[fairy_ends_girl]

good, we can see you now. First of all I think you need a breather time. Whilst thinking about what you should do with your hair just braid it or scarf it up with a nice scarf. Read everyones suggestions before doing anything drastic. If your hair is braided, bunned or scarved then you wont have to look at it and worry about what others are thinking. Everyone is here to help you. :) Chin up girl!

[yellowflower]

Can you see it very well?

When ever i decide to put a dark dye over this hair colour can you please please please stop me, i know by xmas this year it will be half way if not over half way grown out and if i keep dying it i know when it gets to xmas this year i will think if i had just left it it would nearly be out by now....

[milagro]

I came back just in time for picture :cheese:

You know my hair has very similar shade when taken photo of in twisty bulbs' lighting which is now everywhere including my own pad. I guess I should go and shoot myself right on the spot :D

You're overstressed and too keen on yourself. There's nothing extraordinary brassy on your head even if it's not the exact color you like. Nothing to scare the world either :)
Keep babying your hair, tone if needed and most importantly, keep busy and healthy routine to maintain peace within. You will dye or trim/cut your hair in a few weeks and in a few months you'll have a nice virgin grow and everything will sort out gradually . Good luck! :flowers:

[yellowflower]

I came back just in time for picture :cheese:

You know my hair has very similar shade when taken photo of in twisty bulbs' lighting which is now everywhere including my own pad. I guess I should go and shoot myself right on the spot :D

You're overstressed and too keen on yourself. There's nothing extraordinary brassy on your head even if it's not the exact color you like. Nothing to scare the world either :)
Keep babying your hair, tone if needed and most importantly, keep busy and healthy routine to maintain peace within. You will dye or trim/cut your hair in a few weeks and in a few months you'll have a nice virgin grow and everything will sort out gradually . Good luck! :flowers:


Thank you, I know dying it again would just set me back. I am feeling alot happier at the moment not sure why, I think maybe its the thought that I nearly dyed my hair the other day and that would have put me 6weeks back.

I am going to try really hard really really really hard to just get on with things and not let a colour ruin my days of make me feel upset.

I have had a cut so i can forget about it now for the next 2-3months well at least try and try and be happier.

[Addy]

Adding pic for yellowflower...

http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/6863/glasses3.jpg (http://img831.imageshack.us/i/glasses3.jpg/)


You know, I don't think it looks bad at all!

I'm trying to look for an awful brassy color and I just don't see it!

[fairy_ends_girl]

wow yellowflower! Your hair color is actually quite beautiful!!! Why so down about it? It really does not look brassy. I was expecting to see bright orange but all I see is a beautiful buttery blonde.

[yellowflower]

wow yellowflower! Your hair color is actually quite beautiful!!! Why so down about it? It really does not look brassy. I was expecting to see bright orange but all I see is a beautiful buttery blonde.

Thank you I am starting to feel better, maybe these HD are only saying what they say to me so they can get more money out of me...

[Rocket22]

Your hair looks totally fine IMO. Not at all what I was expecting according to what you described. I personally think this is not so much about hair as to maybe something more personal, as you stated in another post. I do hope you feel better about all this but your hair really does looks good! I like the colors and think they look pretty!

[RadiantNeedle]

Yup, I'm seeing no brass. I'm seeing lots of lovely blonde shades. The variety actually gives your hair depth and shine, from what I can see, as opposed to a flat, uniform colour.
I think a toner could help you to lift some of the warmer colours out, but right now, even in that unforgiving lighting, I'm seeing a lot of nice, natural colours.

[xoxophelia]

I spoke to a different hairdresser yesterday and she said not to bother using the purple shampoo and to go darker instead.

I feel like staying in bed is much better option than having to face the world looking a complete mess. I dont want to go and see a doctor, it sounds silly saying to them i am depressed about my hair, they could give you pills but that isnt really going to change my hair is it? Is not going to get rid of the brassyness.

You might feel better if you come up with a solid plan so this won't happen again. If you would like, you can join some of us in not coloring our hair anymore for now or forever. Many of us are living with two toned hair and some more extreme than others.. but, we go about our lives like everything is normal. You can also color over it with a semipermanent color you like and then start to grow it out.

Possible solutions to draw attention away:
- call your hair strawberry blonde. It is a pretty hair color
- head bands
- hair scarf http://images.indiascanner.com/image/2010/12/HAIR-SCARF.jpg
-hats
-you can cut a pixie and grow it out. at least then it looks intentional

ETA: your hair looks perfectly fine! I think this might just be anxiety getting the best of you here. I'd suggest a nice walk outside, a work out, or a long bath. Something to calm the jitters.

[Addy]

Second pic sent for upload...

http://img220.imageshack.us/img220/3907/pic1e.png (http://img220.imageshack.us/i/pic1e.png/)

Again... I don't think it looks bad at all! Sometimes, we are our worst critics.

[yellowflower]

You might feel better if you come up with a solid plan so this won't happen again. If you would like, you can join some of us in not coloring our hair anymore for now or forever. Many of us are living with two toned hair and some more extreme than others.. but, we go about our lives like everything is normal. You can also color over it with a semipermanent color you like and then start to grow it out.

Possible solutions to draw attention away:
- call your hair strawberry blonde. It is a pretty hair color
- head bands
- hair scarf http://images.indiascanner.com/image/2010/12/HAIR-SCARF.jpg
-hats
-you can cut a pixie and grow it out. at least then it looks intentional

ETA: your hair looks perfectly fine! I think this might just be anxiety getting the best of you here. I'd suggest a nice walk outside, a work out, or a long bath. Something to calm the jitters.

I wont call it any colour dont like strawberry blonde either,

I am just going to deal with it and live with it, i dont care about the 2-toned look, come xmas the majority of it will be out :cheese:

Maybe i am making it into a bigger deal than it really is...

ETA: actually seeing the pictures uploaded on the screen makes me think, why am i making such a fuss it isnt that bad to make people stop and stare and be like omg what has she done...

[ravenreed]

Sometimes when we are really stressed, we pick something to focus on to avoid dealing with the bigger problem that seems overwhelming. Your hair looks fine. It might not be what you wanted or expected, but it certainly isn't something that will send small children crying from the room! I hope things get better for you. :blossom:

[lundmir]

I think your color looks just fine and is beautiful, don't be so hard on yourself! I know it its hard living with an unwanted color, but don't let it rule your life.

If you are really upset about warm tones, you could mix purple vegetable dye with conditioner and let it act as a toner. I do that for my now silver hair, since I have a lot of darker tones I must deal with. A little dye goes a long way.

Of course, do a strand test and see if you like the results, obviously your hair is very important to you.

Best of luck! And do cheer up, we're here to help and support.

[SwordWomanRiona]

I spoke to a different hairdresser yesterday and she said not to bother using the purple shampoo and to go darker instead.

I feel like staying in bed is much better option than having to face the world looking a complete mess. I dont want to go and see a doctor, it sounds silly saying to them i am depressed about my hair, they could give you pills but that isnt really going to change my hair is it? Is not going to get rid of the brassyness.

I know we feel like this sometimes, it's natural, but we have to fight these outbursts! Staying in bed will do nothing to make you feel better, I think. Look at it from this point of view: You just got a colour you don't especially like, something you didn't ask for, so it's natural for you to be annoyed at the hairdressers. But that's not the end of the world! If the colour is going to fade with time, that's it, if not, hair always grows again!
Tackle your problem actively. Lying on the bed thinking 'you look like rubbish' (I bet you don't: you just haven't got what you were expecting) will not help you in the least. So try to find solutions (the shampoo people are talking about, even a semi-permanent hair dye that does fade if you feel very bad about your current shade,...).
And don't let this accident lower your self-esteem: why would you look like rubbish just because your hair colour is more brassy than you would like? Why would you have to be affected by what people might think? Remember that this is a trick of our self-esteem, generally people aren't evaluating us when we walk down the street. And like someone else said, many people like orange/copper/brassy tones (me included), so you may even be complimented.
And a last thing- forget about going to the doctor! They will only give you pills that will make you worse. You "only" suffer a decrease of self-esteem because of your hair-accident. It will pass, sooner than you think. We have all passed through such things. Remember, you are the best person to make your self-esteem better again, so take things actively!!
I wish you the best of luck!

[annieangel149]

omg! i just want to say that i have never known such a loving and supporting forum than this! i wish i had found you guys when i was going through some serious depression!

big hugs to u all! yellow flower! i really like your hair! it might not be the colour you wanted but let me tell u this story! two days before i got married a friend came to bleach my hair!(she was a hairdresser) ..... well.... my hair went very wrong! ... BRIGHT BIG BIRD YELLOW! i promise u im not exagerating! to cut a long story short i went to toni and guys and they made it lovely just in time for my wedding! i look back and laugh now but wow! i remember that! lol!

[mellie89]

I just wanted to say that if I saw you on the street, I wouldn't think twice about your hair color. Honestly, it looks really pretty!

I hope you start to feel better about it. :flower: If your depression is due to underlying issues, changing your hair any more isn't going to help. I'd just baby it from now on and do little trims if/when you start noticing split ends or white dots.

[spidermom]

I agree - the color is not bad at all. Just take good care of your hair, learn a few ways to tie a scarf or get a few caps to wear on the days that you can't deal with it, get little trims, and this too shall pass.

[SwordWomanRiona]

I forgot to say this, you could also try reading Your Erroneous Zones, by Wayne W. Dyer. I think you can download it for free. It's a great book, it always helps me when I'm feeling bad.


Adding pic for yellowflower...

http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/6863/glasses3.jpg (http://img831.imageshack.us/i/glasses3.jpg/)


You know, I don't think it looks bad at all!

I'm trying to look for an awful brassy color and I just don't see it!

That's right, to me it's blonde. Very nice colour, honestly!

[thisischristine]

You probably think we are saying it to be kind, but I LOVE your hair colour!! It's exactly what I wanted for years - when I finally achieved it I discovered it, it didn't suit my skin tone at all so I didn't keep it. But honestly, gorgeous.
:o

[yellowflower]

You probably think we are saying it to be kind, but I LOVE your hair colour!! It's exactly what I wanted for years - when I finally achieved it I discovered it, it didn't suit my skin tone at all so I didn't keep it. But honestly, gorgeous.
:o

Thank you everyone, i am feeling much happier.

And to tell you the truth, it actually doesnt match my skin tone either:o But oh well i got it now for the next year untill it grows out

[dragonmyst]

Yellow flower I just have to say.... that is a beautiful color. No need to stress about it. And dudette, I would avoid the hairdressers. I personally don't trust em (no offense to any here mind you)

I am the only one who cuts my hair. And I do a trim about once a year if at all. My hair grows. Fast! Cutting the bottom doesn't affect what grows off the top ;)

Personally I believe the only reason a hairdresser says "trim every six weeks" is to line their pockets with some of your hard earned if you know what I mean ;)

It is a lovely color, one I have always wanted (I'm a natural dark brunette who has gone bleach and henna :P) but don't think I'll do.

[Fethenwen]

Adding pic for yellowflower..

You know, I don't think it looks bad at all!

I'm trying to look for an awful brassy color and I just don't see it!
I honestly don't see it either! I love the way it has many different shades of blonde, looks more natural that way.

Also I think your hair even looks like it's in a pretty decent shape, and not at all fried.

[HintOfMint]

It's actually a very pretty and very normal shade of blonde.

I agree that you were probably channeling all of your anxiety and unhappiness into your hair. It's awful to have relationship problems and it sounds like your boyfriend really means a lot to you.

And I disagree with SwordWomanRiona not all psychiatrists just load pills down your throat and call it a day. There are many responsible psychiatrists who just as easily help people with therapy which is definitely what you need. You've had depression problems before which is probably why your reaction has been so dire. You should try to get some professional help. You may have to shop around though, not all therapists fit the same, just like not all people can be friends.

It sounds like your boyfriend broke your heart and you need to figure out what you want from your relationship and whether he is equipped or willing to give it to you.

Please forget about your hair, because I think there are bigger issues in your life to work on. I wish you the best of luck, and we're all here for you.

[Dyefree]

Oh dear.... Honestly, I can't see how you would be depressed about your hair.

Its beautiful....

Honestly, genuinely, so multi-tonal, it's perfect for your curls, it totally emphasises it.

Honestly honey, I would kill for your hair....I've posted similar posts to yours, and my hair is seriously shot.

Believe me, your hair is fine- ignore those hairdressers :mad:

[vanity_acefake]

Judging by your picture it looks really cute. Not brassy at all. And you seem to have natural texture. Perfect for retro looks if you like them. (I love retro hair).
The blonde looks really sunkissed and pretty.

[McFearless]

*shakes yellowflower*
SNAP OUT OF IT!

If you would just calmly read the advice I think you could be on your way to liking your hair. It seems like you've got your mind made up that its hopeless but thats not the case. I would advise against going dark because you said you didn't like it.

Listen to the ladies on this forum. They will help you get your blonde back. Don't listen to hairdressers. They are....evil.

EDIT: looking at the photo you posted I have to say, I don't think your hair needs correcting. I think you just need to get used to it. Change can be scary. Honestly I love the multi tones in your hair. Focus your energy on growing your hair, not altering the wonderful colour your have:)

[chopandchange]

Your hair colour is not that bad at all!

Once, I tried to dye my hair using a home-dye kit on top of bleach highlights and it really did go orange. Pumpkin orange.

I know how awful it is to see your loved ones biting their lips and trying very hard not to laugh when they look at you out of compassion because you are crying so hard.

And I can tell you, compared to my orange hair, yours is NORMAL. It is NOT ORANGE. No one will be biting their lip to try not to laugh. It might not be the colour you wanted, but it's not ORANGE! Take it from me, OK? A person who really DID once have orange hair.

[virgo75]

Ok, I avoided posting in this(and the other) threads until I saw the pic.

I figured it's really hard to comfort someone if their hair looks terrible.
I'm also not a good liar and don't waste my time saying, "oh no, your hair looks GREAT!" and it's a lie.

But in 100% honesty - I don't see what the problem is?
Your hair - the color, the waviness, and the style you have it in- are very pretty.

I agree with the others who suggest that you speak with someone to help you with the problems you've had with your boyfriend. It's affected you so terribly that you don't realize that your hair is lovely and you were ready to shave your head full of pretty hair.

I wish you all the best and hope you are able to feel better and see you and your hair for how lovely they really. :flower:

[Fufu]

Yellowcolour: You know what, I actually wish my hair colour was just like yours. >_< Unfortunately, I can't carry off blone colour.

I find that hair colourings are to each his own. They will be a handful of people that dislike your hair colour and make unpleasant comments. I had 3 colours on my hair, ash brown i think, black at roots, some leftover red and blonde. I still love my hair.

I find my hair colour different and unique on me. Embrace your hair colour sweet :) The best thing you can do for yourself is to love your hair far more than other people.

Perhaps, you felt that your hair colour is uneven like some part are lighter or darker than the rest of them? I feel that nowadays hair colours doesn't need to be even. You wear your hair, don't let your hair wear you.

Your hair colour looks good, seriously :) and your hair texture is gorgeous...

[aenflex]

I agree with milagro. Despite the fact that here we all are on the hairboards, people really aren't as shocked or curious about exact hair colour anymore. All the Greens, Red, Purples, Rainbows Mohawks and Fauxhawks. What's a little copper tone compared to those?

[teela1978]

I think you need to quit looking in mirrors! Ignore the hair for a while, then figure it out later. It'll still be there.

[Rabya-Khadija]

How you can miss out on doing things because you don't like your hair colour is beyond me! When I ever feel down I look at my life compared to the sheer amount of people who struggle to survive every day or are severely ill... it helps put things into perspective (and makes me feel a bit bad for being so trivial). That's just me though.

There's a lot of advice here which is really useful and the tinting idea seems the best option. Honestly though, I don't see anything out of the ordinary or particularly strange about your colour.

[lapushka]

By your description and going by what you think of it, your hair is terrible, ready to be shaved off, the worst thing in the world, horrible to look at, something you shouldn't even get out of bed for! Then you posted that pic, and I thought OMG, *this* is what she's been complaining about. Honestly! Reality check.

I agree with McFearless, snap out of it, already! I know you feel terrible for a number of reasons, but you cannot keep going on about this. At some point you have to get yourself together and try to look at this objectively, reasonably. There are far worse things in the world, and there are people around here with lots of *real* concerns and terrible disasters going on in their lives, who are maybe hoping to get their minds off their worries a bit.

I understand it's terrible if your hair doesn't turn out the way you want or had expected, but what you're doing is overreacting to the max and you need to realize it, and come to grips with whatever the underlying cause is for this behavior.

I hope you get it sorted out, and I sincerely hope you listen to the advice many of us have given you.

[kittylover]

Honestly, I think your hair looks beautiful. I wish my hair was that colour. My hair actually IS orange. I would trade with you in a heartbeat. You can have my hair which is dark nicotine yellow on top and orange at the bottom. I am just wearing my hair up and forget about it. I am hoping some of this nastiness will wash out at some point.

[oktobergoud]

It looks wonderful! Looks like a nice golden blue to me, not bad at all! :)
When, yeaaars ago, I dyed my hair from black to platinum, I had orange/yellow awful hair that was DEAD, sooo dead and fried that I couldn't do anything with it than leave it alone! I'll see if I can show you a picture that might make you feel a bit better ;)

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e375/moresque/IMG_0235a-1.jpg

That's how I looked like for a month.. it wasn't nice, but I got to live with it ;) Eventually I got a pixie, don't worry! This was years ago and my hair is now looking a lot better (but still a pixie haha)
I hated it at the time and felt very self conscious, but I can sort of laugh about it now ;)
Your hair looks a MILLION times better! Plus it looks in great condition as well :D

[Toadstool]

Your hair looks very pretty to me. If you continue to have debilitating self esteem issues to do with your appearance, I would recommend therapy. It's helping me. Hope you feel better about yourself soon. Hugs

[breezefaerie]

I work with a girl who has GORGEOUS hair and it it exactly the same shade as yours. The same hair type too. Don't be so hard on yourself.

[Rabya-Khadija]

It looks wonderful! Looks like a nice golden blue to me, not bad at all! :)
When, yeaaars ago, I dyed my hair from black to platinum, I had orange/yellow awful hair that was DEAD, sooo dead and fried that I couldn't do anything with it than leave it alone! I'll see if I can show you a picture that might make you feel a bit better ;)

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e375/moresque/IMG_0235a-1.jpg

That's how I looked like for a month.. it wasn't nice, but I got to live with it ;) Eventually I got a pixie, don't worry! This was years ago and my hair is now looking a lot better (but still a pixie haha)
I hated it at the time and felt very self conscious, but I can sort of laugh about it now ;)
Your hair looks a MILLION times better! Plus it looks in great condition as well :D

Wow lol it's orange but you suit it! I just wouldn't... at all:p

[IndigoAsh]

Ok, so I just totally saw the photo right now and I was expecting an orange/yellow rust water color and it looks amazing!!!!! Don't cry =^.^= And I'm sure you've gotten out of bed by now but just steer clear of salons and you'll be ok. I really am serious when I say I think the color is perfect. I think it looks very natural and nice on you. It even goes awesome with your skin color. Much <3 and don't be so hard on yourself!

[yellowflower]

Do you know what I am looking on these pictures in a completly different light now, maybe i have been listening to these hairdressers with their opinions way too much, when really i should learnt they are trying to mark up business to get more money by saying i can do this and i can do that.

Thanks everyone I am feeling loads better, I really am.

Its stupid people like the boy in my office who keeps making stupid remarks that made me cry today, but why should i even care what he thinks, i am not asking him to wear my hair, he can take a hike!!!!!

I have this colour and its staying until it grows out, and I WILL ENJOY each stage of teh journey and one day look back and think oh dear....never mind, live and learn never again

[mrs_coffee]

I agree with everyone who said they like the color. It looks like a nice shade of blond with some butterscotch highlights. To me it's very pretty. I'm glad you're feeling better. I think you're right to shrug off the stupid comments people are making. What do they know anyway?

[yellowflower]

Also may I add, I looked in the mirror at the re-growth at the back and its so dark and nearly jet black, I have never really paid much attention to that before, but its so dark and shiny and looks amazing, I cant wait till I have a full head of it. With my curls and it will be long and really dark and really shiny as I have strated oiling and taking really good care of it so when it grows out its going to be AWSOME :)

[yellowflower]

I agree with everyone who said they like the color. It looks like a nice shade of blond with some butterscotch highlights. To me it's very pretty. I'm glad you're feeling better. I think you're right to shrug off the stupid comments people are making. What do they know anyway?

Very true I agree

[dragonmyst]

Also may I add, I looked in the mirror at the re-growth at the back and its so dark and nearly jet black, I have never really paid much attention to that before, but its so dark and shiny and looks amazing, I cant wait till I have a full head of it. With my curls and it will be long and really dark and really shiny as I have strated oiling and taking really good care of it so when it grows out its going to be AWSOME :)


Thats the spirit! Of course it will be awesome, the folks here on this board have such great info to help you get the best from your hair!

[Purdy Bear]

Your hair looks fine to me, I wouldnt even worry about it.

It could have been a lot worse, a girl I knew had her hair professionally dyed, hated it within a week then did a home dye and went flourescent GREEN. She already had short hair, so went to wearing a wig. It never taught her a lesson though she still messed around with her hair until it started to break and fall out.

[maus]

What the heck (what I really wanted to say was ..., but I was worried I would get banned for that, LOL)? Beautiful color you have there!!!!