PDA

View Full Version : Would you let your kids straighten their hair?



Dreamkitty
December 31st, 2010, 12:22 PM
I don't have any kids but my little cousin who is 6 years old straightens her hair frequently. Her natural hair is beautiful with slight curls. Everytime time I go to my uncles house, I see her hair is straightened and Ive noticed this from when she was 4-5 years old. Whats funny is that her mum's hair is very straight naturally so Im assuming the straightener is used frequently on her daughter.

My cousin loves styling her hair, fashion etc. Seeing her straighten her hair at such a young age makes me want to say something to her mum and give her advice that she is damaging her childs hair at a early age. Imagine 10 years later, her hair will be dry & thin. I also think my cousins hair look so much prettier when its natural.

:D I just don't like watching people damage their hair but should I say something?

ScarlettAdelle
December 31st, 2010, 12:31 PM
Depends on the type of straightening.. chemical staightening, absolutely not until at least 12, flat ironing, if they're old enough not to burn themselves, sure. I'd just make them buy their own iron and do their hair themselves.. if they're old enough to straighten their own hair, they're old enough for the responsibility of earning the money and making a good purchase. However, I would also express how i'd prefer they didn't flat iron it, but it's their hair, and if they want to color it, straighten it, cut it, w/e, they'll find a way to circumvent express orders to the contrary.. at least if they're my kids, because karma has her ways of reminding us of our past haha

ibleedlipstick
December 31st, 2010, 12:35 PM
If I decide to have children, I will let them do whatever they want to their hair.

My mum allowed me to bleach my hair out when I was nine, dye it multiple different colors, try every cut imaginable, because it grows back, and you are only young once.

Yes, it did damage. I've had my hair cut extremely short multiple times. But it works out, and because of the experimentation I was allowed to do in my early years, I don't have any sort of curiosity as to what my hair would look like if I did X to it been there, done that.

I have a couple close friends that were forced to keep their hair super long and braided all the time, and they now have their hair either super short/dyed and fried to the nth degree. Anecdotal evidence, but I messed with my hair throughout my childhood, and it turned out fine.

Also, hair changes during puberty I know several stylists that won't do a perm on a child under 13 because of the differences in hormones, so most of the fantastically long hair grown under the age of ten probably won't be hanging around by the time she reaches her late teens.

And for other people's children, it isn't any of my business. When I had my hair bleached at ten or so, my mum would get a lot of people that were shocked and had responses like "I would never let my child do that! How do you feel comfortable allowing that!?" It didn't cause happy feelings, trust me. It isn't abusive or harmful to the child's well being, and therefore no one has a right to try to butt in, even if you think your way is better.

Coffeebug
December 31st, 2010, 12:39 PM
Personally I don't like to see super-trendy super-straight hair on little kids, but if I were you I wouldn't say anything about it. On the grand scheme of things, it's not worth the trouble of a potential argument is it - and if she does damage it, it'll eventually grow out and look nice again won't it.

Mutinous
December 31st, 2010, 12:43 PM
I wouldn't say anything no. It's their hair, let them do what they want with it. I would be offended if someone tried to tell me what to do with my hair so I imagine they would be as well.

That said, I wouldn't chemically straighten their hair. Once they were old enough to buy it and do it themselves that's fine, their choice, but I wouldn't have a part of it. Straightening Irons, again, as long as they were old enough to do it themselves I wouldn't have a problem.

HairFaerie
December 31st, 2010, 12:49 PM
My daughter got a straightener (iron) when she was about 13 or 14. She has natural, beautiful ringlets and it pained me to see her do it. I warned her of the damage but did not lecture her. She chose to do it any way. It's her hair, I didn't want to push my opinions on to her. I personally don't like that straight style but that's what was in style at her age. I let her choose on her own. She's 22 now and still does it!

My sons have naturally curly hair too and they have a straightener. My younger son (16) had longer hair for a while and straightened it. It got very dry and damaged and he finally wanted it cut short to get rid of the damage. He doesn't straighten any more. My older son (17) still straightens his hair once in a while.

To me, they are old enough to make their own decisions about their hair. As teenagers, I let them do what they feel comfortable doing with their hair. My parents didn't tell me how to wear my hair as a teenager (aside from not allowing me to dye it), other than that, they left me & my sisters to our own styles. So, I carried that on to my children.

Like I said, I warned them and tried to educate them on the damage it will cause, but other than that, I stayed out of it. If they are happy, I am happy!

Vorvolaka
December 31st, 2010, 12:50 PM
If I had kids, I'd let them do whatever they wanted to their hair. My mum always let me do whatever and it never harmed me.

MandaMom2Three
December 31st, 2010, 12:53 PM
Not my kid, not my business :shrug:.

That said personally no I wouldn't. Mostly due to the potential for a nasty burn. If they wanted to try something like that I would help them with it, ask my son who enjoyed his temporary blue mohawk :D.

Copasetic
December 31st, 2010, 12:53 PM
You definitely should not say something. We can't expect our version of "proper hair care" from everyone. To each his own!

I wouldn't straighten my child's hair just because I probably wouldn't want to spend that much time on my child's looks. If they wanted to do it themselves when they were old enough to operate a flat iron, they can go for it. But it doesn't seem worth it to me to style a small child's hair.

eezepeeze
December 31st, 2010, 12:56 PM
Not a mom, but...
Probably not such a young kid, but a tween or teen? Sure.

I just think the little ones should be more worried about playing and learning and being full of wonder than what their hair looks like. I'd want my little girl to be happy in a braid/ponytail out swinging or playing in the dirt or hosting tea parties, carefree.

But once girls get in middle school, they become so self-conscious and peer-oriented. If all I had to worry about was her hairstyle, I think I'd be okay with that. ;)

Anywhere
December 31st, 2010, 12:57 PM
If they didn't burn themselves, or the house down (leaving it on and on a bed, like I almost did. Burnt a hole in my quilt :o)

But on the other hand, I also believe it is saying "sure you can change yourself to look more like the social norm. There's nothing wrong with changing yourself for those reasons." (I was made fun of for never brushing my wurly/curly hair in grade school, went to school with brushed, frazzled, bleached, damaged hair in 5th and 6th grade..)

But of course if s/he's not doing it to fit in then I would be okay with it. Thats just why I started doing things like that. Other people can do it if it makes them happy, I'd prefer if they didn't hate how they looked before though.. but it's not my hair, afterall...:shrug: but isn't 4-5 like kindergarten age?! :eek::bigeyes:

HairFaerie
December 31st, 2010, 12:58 PM
I wanted to add to this...when my kids were 4 or 5, I would not have let them use a straightener. To me, that's too young. But, once they were teenagers, I let them choose how to style their hair.

If I saw a 4 or 5 year old with straightened hair, I would be a bit sad. Kind of like seeing little girls with make-up on (aside from paying "dress-up" once in a while at home). There's time enough to do that when you get older.

The reason for that, in my opinion, is that a 4 or 5 year old should be playing and enjoying childhood and not have to worry about what's in style or what the other kids are doing/wearing. I know as they grow up, that kind of stuff becomes important to them. Why rush it though?

I am not judging, this is just my opinion...

HairFaerie
December 31st, 2010, 01:02 PM
I just think the little ones should be more worried about playing and learning and being full of wonder than what their hair looks like. I'd want my little girl to be happy in a braid/ponytail out swinging or playing in the dirt or hosting tea parties, carefree.

Exactly! You posted this right as I was typing my other response. Well worded.

ScarlettAdelle
December 31st, 2010, 01:07 PM
Also, hair changes during puberty I know several stylists that won't do a perm on a child under 13 because of the differences in hormones, so most of the fantastically long hair grown under the age of ten probably won't be hanging around by the time she reaches her late teens.

And for other people's children, it isn't any of my business. When I had my hair bleached at ten or so, my mum would get a lot of people that were shocked and had responses like "I would never let my child do that! How do you feel comfortable allowing that!?" It didn't cause happy feelings, trust me. It isn't abusive or harmful to the child's well being, and therefore no one has a right to try to butt in, even if you think your way is better.

This is one of many reasons, my other main reason is that as a child I got many chemical burns on my scalp due to a chemical relaxer. A lot of childrens skin is sensitive, and a lot of kids want that hair straight so bad they'll sit through that pain and tell you it's not hurting because they want the curl gone so bad. I don't ever want to put someone through what happened to me, it was absolutely awful.

Well put and I agree.

Maggie May
December 31st, 2010, 01:12 PM
If it were me, I would probably not give advise because I feel people have a right to do what they wish to do. I do though think it would be fine to educate someone about the damage that heat and unnatural processes can do. If I have kids, we will not have any of these appliances in the house and I would tell them that their natural hair is beautiful, because it is! (natural hair)

spidermom
December 31st, 2010, 01:14 PM
Of course. I used to smooth out my daughter's naturally curly hair with a large barrel curling iron whenever she asked me. The only thing I balked at was when she wanted a perm at age 13 or 14. I knew she didn't need one and wouldn't like it, so I wouldn't pay for it. She saved up her birthday and babysitting money and got it herself. And she didn't like it. That was a good lesson for her in listening to me.

pepperminttea
December 31st, 2010, 01:18 PM
I don't want children, but I don't see why not. If they're at an age to do it safely, and it's what they want... :shrug: I wouldn't initiate it or encourage it, but it's not something I'd forbid. Might as well mess with your hair when you're at an age when it doesn't matter too much, and you don't have to look "professional."

ETA: As for your young cousin; I wouldn't mention anything about the damage, and definitely not to the parents, but perhaps next time she wears her hair natural compliment her on how beautiful it looks, especially the waves/curls. Just be careful to say it plainly, not finish with "so much nicer than straightened!" or anything (as I'd be so tempted to do). Make her feel good about her hair.

vanity_acefake
December 31st, 2010, 01:50 PM
My daughter is 7 and I have straightened her long hair twice. I have also crimped it twice. This was for special events like her school party and Christmas.
She knows never to touch my straightners or crimpers as they get incredibly hot and could either burn her extremely badly or burn down our house!
I would not let her have it done to her hair on a regular basis. If she wants wavy hair normally then I put her hair in small braids when it is damp after her bath.
I am gently teaching her about hair care as she is growing her hair (as long as Rapunzel!). She has her own flower pot tangle teezer and loves me to put coconut oil on the ends of her hair after shampooing as she loves the smell

SheaLynne
December 31st, 2010, 01:53 PM
Just a thought, but if the mom has straight hair and her daughter has curly hair, the mom may not know how else to keep it from being tangled all the time. Being in those shoes myself (mostly straight myself and a curly 6 yo dd), I've had to put alot of effort into learning how to work with curly hair. IF--and only if--you are fairly confident that might be where this stems from, you might kindly offer that you've found a website that gives great ways to work with curly hair, and give her the link to curlygirl or here and the wurly/curly thread?

Otherwise, I'd have to agree that you should patiently stay out of it. There may be opportunities over the years to compliment her natural hair and give pointers.

rach
December 31st, 2010, 02:00 PM
Not my kid, not my business :shrug:.


:agree: It's there business

MandaMom2Three
December 31st, 2010, 02:02 PM
My daughter is 7.... I am gently teaching her about hair care as she is growing her hair (as long as Rapunzel!). She has her own flower pot tangle teezer and loves me to put coconut oil on the ends of her hair after shampooing as she loves the smell

My daughter (7 in March) is growing her hair too. She joked about wanting ankle length, not realizing it's actually possible. I showed her a picture of Dianyla's ankle length hair and then she decided she really does want to try! She's so cute always reminding me to take care of her hair. I've been COing with her but I'm thinking of trying the oil shampoo on her since I'm having so much success with it (we have very similar hair types; thin, fine and wavy :p ). She hated the hair dryer so she had no problem giving THAT up :laugh:

ravenreed
December 31st, 2010, 02:06 PM
I wouldn't let a child that young use a very high heat appliance period. However, it has nothing to do with damage and everything to do with safety. Even from an early age, I let my sons decide what they wanted to with their clothing and hair, within reason.

MandaMom2Three
December 31st, 2010, 02:09 PM
Even from an early age, I let my sons decide what they wanted to with their clothing and hair, within reason.

LOL when I was pregnant with my first I took a parenting class offered by my church. The speaker said something like "If it's not life threatening, not morally threatening and if it will grow back, say yes!" I loved it :D.

Toadstool
December 31st, 2010, 02:17 PM
not if they were under ten because I hate the way fashion puts pressure on children. Yes, if they were teenagers because that's when they are finding their own identity.

ravenreed
December 31st, 2010, 02:23 PM
Actually, I always thought of it as more of "pick your battles wisely," but it sounds like your church gave you great advice. :D


LOL when I was pregnant with my first I took a parenting class offered by my church. The speaker said something like "If it's not life threatening, not morally threatening and if it will grow back, say yes!" I loved it :D.

rach
December 31st, 2010, 02:23 PM
safety is defiantly the issue here. I read this post to quick (excuse my scatty eyes) , if the parent straightens it then no it none of our own business but if the child is at risk of burning themself then yes that becomes a issue. Hair is replaceable but burn skin and a distrort child is certainly not on. It's a hard barrier to know when to cross.

ravenreed
December 31st, 2010, 02:31 PM
Something else I have often asked myself before freaking out, "Will this matter when he is forty??" If the answer is no, then it is a lot less important that it might seem at that moment.

see_turtle
December 31st, 2010, 02:46 PM
Absolutely not! Maybe at age 15 or so. Maybe. When you're a kid you get what you get when it comes to hair as far as I'm concerned.

Speckla
December 31st, 2010, 02:56 PM
I would not let my child straighten their hair chemically or with an iron. My son wanted to have his hair relaxed and I said no. I'd rather teach them to love and appreciate their natural texture then try to change it with something potentially damaging.

LorenHope
December 31st, 2010, 03:02 PM
No offense to you but, I would not say anything until you find out what is going on. Just ask -politely- about what/ how they style her hair. Then, if it seems they are interested or you can do it in a way that won't hurt the relationship (some people get really offended by people who don't have kids putting in their two cents) let them know your view and alternative ways to help their daughters hair. But personally, I wouldn't put anything unnatural in my child's hair until they initiated it themselves.

enfys
December 31st, 2010, 03:06 PM
I wouldn't say anything to the parents. It's not your place.

As for if i would let my kids, yes. If they bought straighteners with their own money, or even with gifted money, since it shows commitment. of course, they would have to be pefectly adept at helping me in the kitchen to prove they are responsible with the heat, which I don't think a 6 year old would be. Tween, maybe.

IcarusBride
December 31st, 2010, 03:11 PM
Definitely would not let my 6 year old (if I had one) straiten their hair almost daily.
I think that starting with artificially altering themselves from such a young age is not good for their development of self-worth and personal identity.
I don't see any problem with occasionally doing it, I curled my 10 year old sister's hair for the father-daughter dance this year :D But even so, I was careful not to over-emphasize that instance as 'special' so she won't get the idea that she has to use artificial methods to look 'better' than how she naturally is.
Sorry if I sound totally out-there. I'm young and still formulating my opinions on child-rearing.

BrightEyes
December 31st, 2010, 03:28 PM
My sister-in-law has two little girls, one 4 and one 2. She either straightens or curls their hair every day with a flat iron. I've never felt it was my place to say something, but I do think it's sad. They are so little and they really have no idea what is happening to their hair on a daily basis.

I think that when they are old enough to understand what flat irons and curling irons do to the hair, then they can make that choice themselves. When they are too young to understand, I don't think they even need their hair heatstyled. I'm constantly envious of my daughter's beautiful damage-free hair!!!

Quixii
December 31st, 2010, 03:42 PM
I really want to say no, because it's damaging and I'd be frightened they would burn themselves and I wouldn't want them to succumb to peer pressure.
But how am I supposed to tell my child that I am controlling the choices they make about their own body without sounding like a jerk to myself?

My parents let my colour my hair all sorts of unnatural, washable colours, but that was all I wanted to do with it. I never wanted to bleach, straighten, or cut it.
I don't know if they would have let me straighten or bleach it if I had wanted to.


Edit: I definitely wouldn't let a six year old, though. I teach five years olds right now, and they are way too jittery and jumpy. I wouldn't trust any of them with something like that. Plus, like someone else mentioned, I don't think it's good for the development of self-esteem to be self-altering from so early an age.
If I were to let them, I'd set an age at which I'd allow them to start - probably 10-13, maybe.

McFearless
December 31st, 2010, 03:44 PM
I used to straighten my curls as a kid to the point my hair became straight. As for "hair grows back" thats not always the case with flat irons and hair dye, they cause permanent damage. My hair never grew back the same. I would try to talk my kids out of it but at the end of the day its their choice what they chose to do with their hair. Maybe I'd encourage it- then they'd do the opposite.

Regarding your cousin its up to you if you want to give advice. It depends how close you are with her mom. Personally I wouldn't stick my nose in it :)

Toad Squalor
December 31st, 2010, 04:40 PM
I think that six years old is a little young to start really experimenting with your hair, but it's not my place to impose my opinions on other peoples' children. If it were my child, I would probably make them wait until they at least hit puberty to start faffing with their hair like that.

FullMoonTrim
December 31st, 2010, 04:50 PM
I don't have any kids but my little cousin who is 6 years old straightens her hair frequently. Her natural hair is beautiful with slight curls. Everytime time I go to my uncles house, I see her hair is straightened and Ive noticed this from when she was 4-5 years old. Whats funny is that her mum's hair is very straight naturally so Im assuming the straightener is used frequently on her daughter.

My cousin loves styling her hair, fashion etc. Seeing her straighten her hair at such a young age makes me want to say something to her mum and give her advice that she is damaging her childs hair at a early age. Imagine 10 years later, her hair will be dry & thin. I also think my cousins hair look so much prettier when its natural.

:D I just don't like watching people damage their hair but should I say something?
Too bad you can't get her a copy of the movie Good Hair!
http://www.goodhairdvd.com/ by Chris Rock. He talks about the dangers of chemically straightening your hair. Do they use a straightening iron or chemicals? Maybe there is a way to make the daughter fall in love with her long curly hair. Maybe there is a movie for girls that features a girl with curly hair beautiful hair. :)

Can I ask a question? Why is the daughters hair curly if the mom has straight hair? Does the Dad have curly hair?

christine1989
December 31st, 2010, 04:53 PM
Kids at my middle school were skipping class, doing meth and drinking cough syrup to get high. My mom figred that my compulsive hair straightening was pretty trivial in the grand scheme of things.

Angeletti
December 31st, 2010, 04:58 PM
If it were my child I would never let them use hair straighteners or anything similar when they were so young, mainly because it's not safe and the child could get burned. I'd be fine with it once they reach their teens.

estherbeth
December 31st, 2010, 05:03 PM
No, I wouldn't. Not that young, at any rate. I'd do my best to instill a love of her (or his) hair's natural state. If they wanted to start straightening it on up in their teens, I'd let them try it, but only after illustrating what awful things it can do to their hair.

I'm having a similar problem with my 10-year-old niece. My sister-in-law lets my niece's hair grow to about mid-back, then chops it all off to about chin length because she doesn't want to bother with taking care of it. It frustrates me because my niece wants very long hair and she oohs and ahhs over mine when she gets to visit. It's just gorgeous when it gets longer, but her mother won't try to teach her how to take care of it and they don't live close enough for me to make the attempt. :mad:

Dreamkitty
December 31st, 2010, 05:04 PM
:) Interesting replies, I probally wouldn't have the courage to say what I really want to my cousins mother. I don't want to give her a lecture as its her child but I just feel like giving hair advice & it is just painful to watch someone damage their hair at an early age. I wonder if her mum knows this?.

I told my mum about it, she said its their kid so its the parents choice.

My cousin's hair is slightly curly, I think she inherited her dad's hair. Her mums side has fairly straight hair. She doesn't flat iron it herself but her mother does it for her. Im not sure if my cousin straightens her hair everyday but whenever I go to their house or I meet them, her hair is always straightened or styled so it does make me very curious.

When I was a child, my mum was always strict about using things on my hair and she still thinks natural is best.:D

virgo75
December 31st, 2010, 05:15 PM
I wouldn't say anything no. It's their hair, let them do what they want with it. I would be offended if someone tried to tell me what to do with my hair so I imagine they would be as well.

That said, I wouldn't chemically straighten their hair. Once they were old enough to buy it and do it themselves that's fine, their choice, but I wouldn't have a part of it. Straightening Irons, again, as long as they were old enough to do it themselves I wouldn't have a problem.


2nd all of this.

I have a daughter who has very tightly curly hair.
I've let her straighten it(well, I straighten it for her) a couple of times a year when she wants to do something different with her hair. It gets deep conditioned before and after so she doesn't have any problems with dryness or breakage.

I only use a blowdryer and/or a flat iron and don't chemically straighten it.

When she's an adult what she chooses to do to her hair is her business. Not everyone is obsessed with growing long hair. Some people just see their hair as an accessory to be styled and used to accentuate their appearance. :shrug:

If I had a relative who was doing something damaging to their child's hair the only thing I would do would offer to help with deep conditioners to possibly counteract some damage. It's really not my business(or anyone's) to step in and tell someone what to do with their child unless there's actual abuse involved.

fairystar32
December 31st, 2010, 05:15 PM
My daughters hair is very curly she had hers straightened with iron at the hairdressers for xmas and I straightened it for New year. She begged for it and she is 13 almost 14. I have told her it will ruin it long term so we sprayed with a protective spray and will only do it on special occasions.

ravenreed
December 31st, 2010, 06:09 PM
Okay, I have to say this because it is bugging me. "Damage" really only matters if you plan to grow your hair really long or if you have fragile hair. I don't think that worrying over a youngster's hair because they might cause some extra split ends makes a lot of sense if they are okay with it. If they are old enough to handle a hot iron correctly then they are old enough to decide whether they want split ends or not. *shrug*

fairystar32
December 31st, 2010, 06:14 PM
I worry over my DD hair as its waist length and she intends to keep it that way :)

Kaeita
December 31st, 2010, 07:21 PM
I wouldn't let my son straighten his hair - mostly because he has extremely sensitive skin, and even the mildest of mild cleansers, shampoos, soaps, etc burn him. Also because all I need to do to give him straight hair is cut it! He loves his curls anyway, and is very protective of them.

I agree with not liking the impact of "fashion" on young girls - they should be allowed to be children, not feel the need to practice prettying themselves up for men when they're older. I'm not one for fashion at all - I don't do make-up, I wear clothes for comfort, keep my nails at a useful, but practical length, and play with my hair because I like it. I'd rather someone be attracted to who I am, rather than what I've done to my appearance.

All that said, whether I would say anything about the child straightening her hair or not would depend entirely on my relationship with the parents, and how I would say it would depend on how they might best hear the message. If it really bothered me, I might share what I do to take care of my hair, without any reference to them or theirs, and perhaps mention in passing that I read somewhere that this particular act can have this impact on hair health and growth. I know that if it were my family, none of them would believe me until some random stranger on the street told them exactly the same thing, at which point it would become gospel and they'd tell me all about it and how I should do the same. But it's possible that yours isn't quite as messed up as mine!

Rivanariko
December 31st, 2010, 07:46 PM
Hair grows back. If a my (theoretical) children wanted to experiment with it in a safe and healthy way, they can do whatever they want. If they want to grow long, healthy hair, I'll help them do that. But I'm not going to force my ideals of beauty on them any more than I'm going to allow society to force it's views on me.

That said, 6 is too young, IMO. I don't think you should say anything, but I wouldn't allow that at that young of an age. My children would have to be old enough to purchase the iron themselves because I certainly don't have one for them to borrow!

patienceneeded
December 31st, 2010, 08:13 PM
IMO, 6 is too young for hair to be straightened, especially on a daily basis. I can see where a special occasion (wedding, etc) might be okay, but everyday? Too much. However, were the child older (10 or more) I don't think I would be bothered. It is hard for a teen (or tween) to be different from their peers and if straightening the hair is what the teen wants to do to help fit it, then so be it. There are worse things. Again, just my opinion. I teach 8th grade and see many heads of straightened hair, girls and boys. Also, many colors! I's rather have my kid experiment with her hair than experiment with other things. Hair seems pretty harmless in the grand scheme of things. I plan on teaching DD proper hair care and will help her to minimize any damage, but ultimately it's her hair and I think that she should be able to decide how she wants it to look.

jaine
December 31st, 2010, 08:16 PM
The concept of "allowing" or "not allowing" a kid to do something has always struck me as odd.
It's really just a question of who pays for it.

Hair straightening is definitely in the realm of things the kid would pay for, not me. (If I had kids.)

erika_d
December 31st, 2010, 09:57 PM
I only read the original post and am replying to that (in case this doesn't make sense to anyone else).

I would NOT let my daughter under 12 or 13 years old do anything besides cut her hair. Not because of any damage that may develop, but because you're giving in to the feeling of "you're not good enough/pretty enough, etc." as you are. That's with styling it everyday. Once in a while for a special occasion is different.

Once in the teenage years, I would let her experiment to her heart's content because that's what teenage years are for. 5 or 6 is too young, IMO.

Ludde
December 31st, 2010, 11:02 PM
Without getting into a debate if a parent is wrong or not you could perhaps just have a talk with your cousin's mom about hair and how she and her daughter feels about it? It may be educating as well as interesting to hear how other people regard hair.

And as a response to your question; yes, I do think it is ok to play with hair once in a while, also for children, though not on an every day basis. I would however be very much involved and supervising.

thatjengirl1
December 31st, 2010, 11:06 PM
I would not personally straighten a little girls hair. a 6 year old getting her hair straightened just seems weird. she should be busy learning to ride a bike and tye her shoes.

But when the girl is around 13 and she wants to experiment than that's okay.

Dragon
January 1st, 2011, 12:31 AM
I don’t want kids but if I did have one I wouldn’t let them untill they are about 11 or 12 and I would warn them of the damage it does to there hair. I don’t see a problem with it for special occasions but I would do it for them as I would be worried about them burning them self.

trillcat
January 1st, 2011, 01:28 AM
I agree with 11 or 12 or so being the right age to let kids play with their hair like that. For special occasions fine on the younger folks, but 6yrs old, that just hits me wrong. Like "Toddlers & Tiaras" I give way for the heebie jebbies and am creeped out. Parents should not live through their kids, pretty hair and all.
As to say something I would not. Not my place to do that
I am sad though, why are curls wrong?

KBG
January 1st, 2011, 01:48 AM
When they're teens, a blow-dryer occasionally would be okay but I would be afraid of them getting hooked on it. I trashed my hair during that phase with color, relaxers, crazy haircuts and heat tools. I would warn them and show my old photos :D but sometimes people have to learn the hard way.

09robiha
January 1st, 2011, 05:50 AM
straightening at six years old would be a no no for me, but teens is fine. My mum let me and is still letting me do alsorts a crazy things and it never did me any harm.

Avital88
January 1st, 2011, 06:30 AM
If my daughter would be 6 years old i would not even think about straighten her hair frequently.
All the damage to beautiful curls. Never. she is too young to understands what it will do to her hair.
I wished my mum told me not to do all the chemical things i did to my hair ,because it damaged my hair when i was a teen but i didnt know so much about it,yet.
So i think my daughter can straighten her hair when she is around 14 yes,but only once a month. and coloring,yes she can. but i will first give her a lecture about chemicals and damage and show her some pictures of myself with bald spots of doing al these things.

miss_purple
January 1st, 2011, 08:17 AM
Absolutely NOT. I would grow their hair long, healthy and natural (virgin). I'm so sorry that my mother used to trim my hair every couple of weeks in order to maintain it short.

lapushka
January 1st, 2011, 08:29 AM
If I had children, I wouldn't touch their hair with hot tools at all, a blow drier, yes, to get it to dry quicker, but not to style it. My mom did that too. I would be okay with it, though, if the hair dresser did style it with a straightener or curling iron, just once, for a special occasion like their First Holy Communion or something like it, a big occasion like someone's wedding if they needed to be in the wedding.

They're kids. Let them be kids and not worry about things they should only be worrying about when they're tweens and teens.


To the OP: I wouldn't get involved, wouldn't say anything except maybe give her a compliment on how you love her hair and maybe gently nudge her and say that you like waves and curls. That may plant an idea in her head... or it might not. She may hate her texture, although why a 6 year-old would worry about that and know about and be allowed to handle a straightener is... well, beyond me. :confused: