freak length ????

[jojo]

Got told today " oh your hair is soooooo long (its not really) grow it any longer and you will be a freak!!!" OMG am i being sensitive but am I some kind of freak for having long hair? did tell them to mind their own business am i overacting? a actually like really long hair! am i overeating? like freak is offensive yeah?
it really annoys me why some people hate long hair so much, sorry for going on but this is prejudice against long hair ghrrrrrr!

[LaurelSpring]

I've run into this attitude before also. Someone mentioned that hair that is very long and nails that are very long are considered freakish. I honestly didnt give it much consideration because I had already made the decision that I was going to grow it however I wanted to grow it freaky or not.

[pepperminttea]

Sadly, that is just some people's reaction. I don't agree with it, but I don't think waist length is that out of the norm either. :shrug: Telling them to mind their own business sounds quite a rational reaction depending on the tone, but I'm sure there's some users out there with some excellent witty retorts (that my 3am brain can't manage). :)

ETA: I personally take "freak" as a compliment, though it's rarely intended that way. :p

[Madora]

Well, I'm sure that ignorant person wouldn't consider Crystal Gayle a freak!

I sure don't understand the workings of some minds!

[BeccaAngel]

tis not freaky to have long hair lol, some people just don't know how to respond to something that isn't normal to them... if someone said that to me, i would have taken it like a compliment... but i am weird like that lol. you has beautiful hair and don't worry about comments like that.

[Lune d'Loup]

don't sweat it dear and don't worry you are among freaks here (long haired freaks who think your hair is beautiful.) people sometimes don't think what they are saying. it annoys me but i brush it off by saying.....'Yep freak and proud! there's more freaks out there, so don't choke on the gasps please.'
anyway no one called Crystal Gayle or Ruslana a freak, they thought them beautiful.

[spidermom]

Assume she meant it in the nicest possible way. We long hairs have been letting our freak flags fly ever since Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young; proud of it, too.

[Igor]

Ah yes, “What I like and what I find normal” will always be used as the universal ruler for what we measure normality with and what we bash other people over the head with, wont it? :rolleyes:

[lyria]

Based on the number of typos in your post, you do sound upset! But don't let it get to you. Some people just won't get it. I think your hair is beautiful, but it is your opinion that matters. On the other hand, as another poster pointed out, waist is not that uncommon. In fact, looking at the current trend in celebrity hair styles, anything shorter might be "freakish!"

[StarryNight]

I had a family member tell me on Christmas day "I hope you don't grow your hair much longer and turn into one of those weird, freaky-hair people." I could have cried. Instead I just mumbled something unintelligible about not really knowing how long I would grow it and walked away. :(

[Katurday]

I am not normally a violent person, but that deserves a frying pan to the noggin! Some people think their wonderful opinion is oh-so valuable. Don't let their ignorance get to you.

[Jessica Trapp]

"I am not here to decorate your world."

[Juneii]

I find "freak" a compliment, who wants to be an unoriginal and boring person? :)

[HairColoredHair]

Best response: "SWEEEET!"

[DARKMARTIAN]

Well thats certainly not right for someone to prejudge a person based on their hair. Especially according to a projected vision and not even what the current state of its existence is!

I however, could wear a three piece suit and get a cut the local church pastor would be proud of..........and I'd still be a freak....:D

[prosperina]

I however, could wear a three piece suit and get a cut the local church pastor would be proud of..........and I'd still be a freak....:D

Great response! :D

People are dumb. I'd ask her (I'm assuming it was a her) to let you know when you pass that tenuous boundary between freak/and non-freak because clearly she's the expert on freaks.

[IcarusBride]

I guess I'm just as guilty of being judgemental, though, because if someone told me, for example, that they were going to grow their fingernails as long as I am hoping to grow my hair, I'd be really grossed out and would immediately blurt out "OMG That's digusting!" without thinking (I have a tendency to say whatever comes to mind before actually thinking about it, leading to a lot of 'foot-in-mouth' moments!)
Someone made me think of this when they explained to me WHY they think it's disgusting that I collect my shed hairs-- "Well, if you kept a box of fingernail clippings in your bedroom, wouldn't that be gross? How is keeping a massive clump of hair different?"

My point being, probably a lot of people who say these completely rude things don't have cruel intentions, they just have never considered any other perspective before.

[DecafJane]

That is just their opinion. Ignore it an enjoy yourself as you are. ;)

[lilravendark]

I would have said its better to be a freak than a rude !@#&*

[Milui Elenath]

Whenever I get comments like that I usually tell them what my goal is and how long it will take me to get there. :D With a comment like freak, I might have added "actually I'm aiming for super freak!" I don't think they ever continue the conversation once I've asserted that I purposely grow my hair and as it's not a rude response so you can even say it to old aunts. :)

[McFearless]

Hmm...was it mean spirited? Sometimes I reffer to myself as a freak, or maybe even think really long hair is freaky. Not a negative thing, just "strange".

Either way let it slide :)

[slythwolf]

am i overacting? [...] am i overeating?
I can answer neither of these questions from the information in your post.:cheese: However, I definitely do not think you are overreacting. Calling someone a freak is indeed offensive.

Edit: Oh now wait a minute, here's a thought--how old was this person? I have it on good authority from my parents that the group of people we now refer to as "hippies" (and indeed they were called this by people outside the movement at the time) referred to themselves as "freaks". Long hair was a huge part of that counterculture!

[ravenreed]

Eh, I was told by one of my friends that if my hair got much longer it would be "freakishly long," several inches ago. It bugged me a bit, but you know, in the end, I have to please myself first. Another friend had hair longer than mine at one point and her boss told her he thought it was "creepy." Not everyone is going to love your hair. Don't let that stop you.

[Carrie Ingalls]

Well, I think the term freak can be said and received in a number of different ways depending on who is involved. I occasionally use the term when referring to myself in regards to my hair. But more frequently I refer to my length just as crazy long, or super crazy long.

Don't let the comments get to you, and keep your chin up (it makes your hair feel even longer!) :cheese:

[Elenna]

Now Jojo, who knows why people say such things. You are not being overly sensitive to someone being intentionally mean. Freak is defined as weird which I assure you, you are NOT. No you didn't overreact to a personal comment. Not sure where this person is coming from to make such mean, personal remarks.

Long hair is beautiful in my eyes. And your hair is beautiful.

[MissCharizard]

:thumbsup:
I would have said its better to be a freak than a rude !@#&*
:cool:

[Dragon]

It’s just there opinion. Try to not worry about what they said. You cant impress every one and there is heaps who will like your hair as it continues to get longer.

[HintOfMint]

I've been told the same thing. My hair is about waist and in the months prior to hitting that length I was told that I was at a good length and I shouldn't grow it longer. Yet I consistently received more compliments as it grew longer. When people actually see what waist, hip and tailbone length hair can look like when it is in good condition, they tend to eat their words. Don't stress, they don't know what they're talking about.

[luxepiggy]

Well, I think the term freak can be said and received in a number of different ways depending on who is involved. I occasionally use the term when referring to myself in regards to my hair. But more frequently I refer to my length just as crazy long, or super crazy long.

Don't let the comments get to you, and keep your chin up (it makes your hair feel even longer!) :cheese:

^This. Nearly all of my close friends have, at one point, called me a freak of nature, but they mean it in an "you're so lucky that you get to have this special characteristic and nobody else does" kind of way (^(oo)^)

I use the term sometimes too, but I wouldn't give up my freakishly high leg length/height ratio for anything (^(oo)~)

[Lianna]

If that's the case, I can't wait to be a gorgeous long hair freak then. :D Some people can't appreciate all forms of beauty, or even try.

[naturegirl321]

I'm willing to bet that if a woman told you that thanshe's probably jealous of all the attention you get because you have beautiful hair.

[Avvoltoio]

unfortunately many people think waist or longer hair is freak, cause it is very rare to see, and they beleive long hair is not fashionable. And i know many people don't like long hair, or just envy, so you can ignore every bad comment, more good comments will compensate that when your hair is noticable cause it's length, and beauty :)

[UltraBella]

I know a lot of people on this forum have had similar reactions from people. So you are definitely not alone.
I have never experienced anything like this, but in general I am pretty unfazed by other people's opinions. The normal response I get is awe over my hair, not so much the length as the length and thickness combined seems to leave people fairly awe struck.
If and when someone has something negative to say I will probably chuckle and go about my day. If they catch me on a day when I have not had my latte yet, they will realize their mistake quickly !

[ravenreed]

We have had this discussion on the forum before. Not really, some people just hate long hair. Just like some people hate hair dyed in strange colors, or women who are bald, or dreadlocks or anything else.


I'm willing to bet that if a woman told you that thanshe's probably jealous of all the attention you get because you have beautiful hair.

[Medievalmaniac]

Jojo, I would just say, you have worked so hard on your hair, and enjoyed it so much, that you should completely ignore that person. That was a terrifically unsupportive thing to say to you, and I think you deserve major props for all the work and effort you have put into your tresses!!!

[Beatnik Guy]

Well, I think the term freak can be said and received in a number of different ways depending on who is involved. I occasionally use the term when referring to myself in regards to my hair. But more frequently I refer to my length just as crazy long, or super crazy long.
Indeed. Freaky's not necessarily bad. :cheese:


Calling someone a freak is indeed offensive.
...but it's your choice whether to be offended or whether to treat it as a compliment. :cool:

[Angela_Rose]

Well, I consider myself a bit of a freak and I'm sure I'm not alone on this board in my thinking!

So, just tell her you love your freaky hair and that you're in damn fine company. Then, smile graciously and walk away as she flounders for a response.

[Jessica Trapp]

I find "freak" a compliment, who wants to be an unoriginal and boring person? :)

Me too!

I tell people I"m growing it out to hide my thighs and double as a swim suit cover up on the beach. :D

[gretchen_hair]

Jojo, that's when you say...."yea girl, that's right, I'm a Super Freak, the kind you don't take home to mother"

and.........I won't be your Freak on a leash! ;)

I personally think being a freak is normal, well, at our house anyways! Embrace your inner freak, let the freakiness flow. :disco: :disco: :disco:

[Dolly]

Assume she meant it in the nicest possible way. We long hairs have been letting our freak flags fly ever since Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young; proud of it, too.


Spidermom, you just made me spit tea all over my laptop.....LOL...."letting our freak flags fly"......:rollin:

I personally am proud when my hair is the longest in the room.....I like to stand out from the crowd. When people say crap like that to me (and they have), I usually ignore it........but, if they catch me at the wrong moment, I look at them and tell them I would rather be a freak than have hair like theirs and look just like everybody else.......that usually shuts them up and leaves them standing there with a dumb look on their face......gives them something to think about. LOL

[jojo]

some great responses.

I was really mad as I felt embarrassed as though this comment was made to make me look stupid. It was made by a male who is a few years older than me, his wife has very short hair and it really suits her; id never make a comment about her hair to humiliate her.

I had my hair down for the party and a lot of people commented on how long it is, please bear in mind APL to BSL are the most popular length in the village I live in, I dont consider my hair to be extremely long at all.

I just feel annoyed that people seem to think they have the right to comment on my personal appearance when its nothing to do with them, I did tell them to mind their own and that I was growing it to just under my bum *shock horror* but I like some of the come back replies ha ha will use these next time!

And sorry about the typos in first post, i was typing fast because I was annoyed, please bear in mind too I am dyslexic.

[myria]

keep your chin up (it makes your hair feel even longer!)
:D I love that comment!

[Rebelkat]

I've decided that I'm going to start retaliating with "Thank you!" and a big grin when someone feels the need to insult my hair.

"Your hair's too long."
Thank you! :D

"Hair that long is creepy."
Thank you! :D

"You look like a freak."
Thank you! :D

Something tells me that will shut this type of people up but good. Not to mention the fact that turning the negative comment into a positive one is a great self-esteem booster.

[Unofficial_Rose]

Jojo, that's when you say...."yea girl, that's right, I'm a Super Freak, the kind you don't take home to mother"

:disco:

Oh, so I'm not the only person with Rick James playing in their head when they heard this! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYHxGBH6o4M I notice one of the girls in the video has really long hair.

[rusika1]

Hmm. What about "That's the great thing about individuality. I can choose to grow my hair freakishly long, and you can choose to make incredibly rude personal comments to others."

Really though, I would probably have reacted about like you did, with "none of your business" or poossibly "that was very rude" or an extremely icy "Thank you".

I don't think I'd be as bothered by it as you clearly are though, mostly because I don't really care what people think about how I look. Oddly enough, I must give off "don't care, not listening" vibes because I can only think of one person in the past 25 years who tried to talk me into changing my hair--she wanted me to grow it longer when it was really short, and then a few years later when it was long, she tried to talk me into cutting it shorter. (I think she thought shoulder length was perfect, but that's the length I can't stand on myself--long enough to get in my face, too short to braid).

[Imnotarobot]

Don't worry, they are probably just jealous.

[indiana]

Jealousy is an ugly thing. I really think that anyone who would say something rude like that is jealous. Keep on with what makes you happy.

[Sagi1982]

Whats so bad about being called freaky? ;)
My friends and family use this term all the time... :D

I think, real long hair (=midback+) is rare and because of that, some people find it strange, creepy and freaky.

In my opinion, classic+ hair is in a positive kind of way "freaky" - its something rare and unique! :eyebrows:

[PrincessTieflin]

OK I am strange.. I cant wait to be at "freak length"

I love individuality... and being me. even if it means later my hair will define me! :)

Even my DH thinks anything longer then hip is strange I just think a lot of folks look down on what they dont understand.

like "OMG you put what in your hair"

Yea learned to keep my hair routine to myself.

[MissMB]

I've experienced this same attitude before. By both a relative and a non-relative. I'm sorry you feel offended, I think I did too. People have a hard time accepting things that are different.

[Demetrue]

jojo - your hair is lovely and certainly does not look freakish to me at all! It looks great! Maybe the guy was just trying to make conversation with you and was very clumsy at it.

[heidi w.]

It is never going to be the case that you can please all the people all the time; but you can please some of the people some of the time. Don't forget that you count as a "people".

As Spidermom pointed out, Let your freak flag fly!

heidi w.

[littlenvy]

Well colour me freaky!!

LOL.

What a silly thing to say. Unless she meant it like saying "that's so sick" meaning cool? Could that be just lost in translation?

[zubegirl]

Eh, the way I see it, not everyone likes long hair. I mean, there are lots of things I don't like for no good reason. Yeah, it was kinda rude that he commented on it, but, I guess I wouldn't waste much energy on him. I've encountered plenty of people who say, "Ugh, I don't like tattoos," after seeing my tattoos. My response is, "You don't like tattoos! Well, DARN! That was silly of me to get them just for you without asking whether you even liked them!" Then a 'foot in the mouth' moment becomes laughable.

Heck, my own husband prefers women with short hair to those with long hair! And, incidentally, he hates tattoos, too. But that didn't stop him from marrying me! I guess I don't really see the world at large as persecuting people with long hair or anything. Sure, it's different, but isn't that just a small part of the reason some folks have long hair? It's different and unique and interesting. And for that reason it puts long-haired folks exposed to comments. Some are positive, sure (and how nice does that feel?), but not all are.

I'd say let the negative comments roll off your back (Or down your beautiful hair!). And if you are ever not hired for a job because your hair is freaky long? Righteous indignation is in order.

And sorry! That was a mouthful for a newbie!

[Avvoltoio]

Wellcome here zubegirl, i see it is your first post :)
i think you are right

I may your husband not stop you about growing your hair longer :)

[Rini]

If someone said this to me I would be VERY proud and absolutely stoked that my hair was considered long enough to be "freaky". What a day that will be!! :cheese: I will be telling everyone and profusely thanking the giver of such a compliment. I mean, don't you feel like you've "made it" now Jojo? :)

[marzipanthecat]

Oh yes, I get some interesting questions and comments, but my hair is now well into "freak" length (it's longer than my profile pic, these days...). I also dress kind of funny too, although it's not a deliberate thing, I think I'm just getting very strange!

I don't think it matters what you look like of what you do, someone somewhere won't like it and will tell you so. Bah, it's just bad manners really.

[jojo]

If someone said this to me I would be VERY proud and absolutely stoked that my hair was considered long enough to be "freaky". What a day that will be!! :cheese: I will be telling everyone and profusely thanking the giver of such a compliment. I mean, don't you feel like you've "made it" now Jojo? :)

well put that way yeah, it should have been a celebration not an embarrassed moment, suppose its because anything longer than bsl is seen as odd where i live....in future in the words of spidermom i am going to be proud and fly that damn freak flag high, heavens knows ive worked hard to get here!:cheese:

[utdesertrunner]

Your hair is beautiful! Don't let that person sway you or upset you. Was it someone you know? I think that is harder when it is. A few months ago I went in for a cut to my shoulders per my husbands request. I loved it long and crazy and unruly. He likes it with a nice hemline. Well, long story short, the stylist cut from almost waist to my CHIN. Now, neither of us are happy with it and I had to go even shorter to even it out better. Right then and there I decided that I will grow my hair how I like it and everyone else can just worry about themselves. I don't care it is against some sort of "rule" to have hair longer than my collarbone. If I want to grow my hair to my knees I can. And so can you :)

[Timkerbelle]

Some people are just dead afraid of not fitting into a cookie cutter one size fits all ideal of how men and women should look.

[Angeletti]

I hate when people find the need to say negative things pertaining to someone else's appearance when it's none of their business, I don't see how long hair can make someone a "freak", some people are strange. I'll take being a freak over being ignorant like that any day : )

[jojo]

Yeah it was someone I know very well, which I guess is why it hurt more. Its not the fact he commented on my length, I just find the word "freak" very insulting.

[McFearless]

Jojo, that's when you say...."yea girl, that's right, I'm a Super Freak, the kind you don't take home to mother"

:disco: :disco: :disco:


Lol oh my god :applause

[julliams]

But your hair is waist length right, which I personally think is reasonable common. This person must have a very strange idea of what a freak is. You should have said "And what exactly do you mean by freak?". That would have put him on the spot.

[jasper]

I am sorry you were offended. It strikes me as strange when people make unsolicited remarks about personal appearance.

I might have the wrong attitude myself, but I won't be satisfied until my hair reaches freakish lengths.

[sycamoreboutiqu]

Wow, that was a crappy thing to say.

Your hair is beautiful and definitely not to a point where someone should be questioning it. Geez.

On this subject, my daughter and I are both letting our hair grow and are roughly both at about waist. I asked her if / where she thought she might cut it as I was wondering for myself too.

She commented that she once heard a stand-up commedienne do a line about long hair.

It was something to the effect " You have hair down to here ..."she indicates waist length hair) ... 'oooh, that's hot' but go to here (she indicates below hip length) then you are now at "religious fantatic' ".

Sad - but probably an accurate portrayal of how some people think.

I see below hip length as wow, that is impressive !

I am not sure I can handle hip-length, it is starting to get hard to manage at waist. Maybe if it thins out some.

[jojo]

But your hair is waist length right, which I personally think is reasonable common. This person must have a very strange idea of what a freak is. You should have said "And what exactly do you mean by freak?". That would have put him on the spot.

Yeah my hair is waist and IMHO it isnt super lengths as yet, however in my village anything past BSL is very rare unless its extensions especially on somebody in their 40's. now if I venture into Manchester or Leeds (my nearest Cities) waist hair and even hip length is quite common. I suppose the fact I live in a small village anything other than the norm is more noticeable and considered strange!

I wish I had have said " and what do you mean by freak?" personally I find it offensive, but on the side it could be meant as different, strange the word hippy used to make me feel defensive but I quite like being called a hippy as it makes me feel like a proper long hair!:D

[Alexannee10]

I think people say that long hair is freaky because hippies have long hair, and hippies are probably freaky for them hehehe .. peace :)