Im going to go blonde again, should I feel "guilty"?

[LouLaLa]

Ok so I gave up dye a while ago and it was great, I have mid blonde hair naturally but recently I have realized that I am so much happier with very blonde hair. Its just who I am and how I identify with myself.

I even thought about cutting all my hair off this weekend because I felt so fustrated with my hair and just generally felt down about it all.

I just felt so depressed and sad with it, its very odd indeed!
I know hair isnt a big thing but I have quite a few other problems atm and I figure if dying my hair will make me feel less horrid 24/7 then i should just go for it and make the most of all the tricks Ive learned here to keep my hair in great condition.

I went and got dye and I thought my mum would disapprove as she was against me dying it when I used to do so, but to my surprise she said "Oh I think its great, youve seemed very depressed with dark hair and it just isnt you is it, you dont even laugh as much anymore". I was quite shocked as she said I hadnt been like myself, yet she has always been anti hair dye.

So yes, sorry but im going to cave in and go back to the bottle blonde. I think if I dont then ill be getting a much shorter haircut as Im just not happy with my hair anymore. I was about to cut off about 5 inches before I stopped myself and said "2 week rule or regret it!" in my head!

Ill post pics of before and after :)

Will LHC judge that im going to dye my hard worked for virgin hair? :(

All advice appreciated :)

[aenflex]

Why would anyone openly judge? It's your hair, do what you like with it :)

[Unofficial_Rose]

Don't blame you one bit, actually. I did this last year and it made me feel lifted psychologically too.

I went back to dark but only because a) it was breaking off and b) I get fed up with going to the salon.

I do think dark hair can be pyschologically lowering on some. Go for it!

[Dani]

Dude, go for it and get some blondie happies. :D I would never judge you for wanting to do anything at all with your hair; that's craziness. :p I just highlighted and layered my hair a few days ago, and it was fun and awesome and I love it. The last time I grew out my hair all natural was a few years ago, and I got so sick of it that I just chopped it to SL on a whim, then chin the day after that and then into a pixie. When I should've just made my dark blonde hair lighter and I think I would've been very happy with that. Going that way this time. ;) The shine and softness of my natural hair is great, and the color is cool, too, just insanely boring for me after a while. Have fun and enjoy your hair and life! :D

[Maverick494]

Don't feel bad! I always interpreted LHC as a community where people who want to grow their hair to any desired length can come together. There may be lots of us who prefer going natural/henna/indigo over dye/bleach, but that doesn't mean being a bottle blonde is wrong by any means.

You can still grow your hair long as a bottle blonde. Plenty of examples here on LHC. If you click on my profile and go to the 2nd page of comments, FrannyG (who is a beautiful bottle blonde herself) gives some real good dye advice to minimize damage.

So in a nutshell: do what makes you feel good!

[TrudieCat]

It sounds like it's the right thing for you, and it will make you happy. :) Sounds like a good thing to me! LHC is here to help people learn how to enjoy my hair, not to be an open forum for the hair police. ;) Plenty of people dye their hair light blonde and it looks wonderful and is quite healthy (FrannyG comes to mind :))Looking forward to pics!

ETA: Haha, I see the poster above me also mentioned FrannyG. :D She really does have amazingly beautiful blonde hair.

[lapushka]

Are you sure you're not doing this on impulse? You thought, "2 week rule or regret it!" for cutting it shorter, but for the dye... isn't there going to be a 2 week rule?

[Fadedbluedreams]

I would like to say that you ought to do what'll make you happy. But I'd also like to warn you too. My mother had lovely hip length hair when I was growing up. She dyed it blonde, over and over again. Eventually, it actually ended up to mid back without any decision on her part. It actually just broke off that much. Her hair was straight and fine, so maybe some hair types are more resilient, but if length is something you're concerned about, you should consider the possible damage that will result. Then you may be unhappy for that reason. Either way, I hope the choice you make does make you feel better :)

[LouLaLa]

Wow thanks everyone :) Youve cheered me up heaps!!!


TrudieCat- I think youre right sometimes im just not very assertive and I need to do my own thing more to cheer me up!

Maverick- I will for sure check out them tips,I think LHC does allow one to colour but do it without overprocessing it as there are SO many tips. FrannyG has amazing hair too! I didnt think it was dyed at first!

Aenflex- youre right, I need to just do things for my own needs a little.

Unofficial Rose- It is so crazy how hair affects ones mentality, but yes I do think I dont feel myself at all with dark hair, im not a "blonde" by nature but eveything just feels wrong atm.

Dani- That was so sweet and well put, I think you did what I was about to do I was so tempted to hack yesterday. Eek.
Im not sure what was wrong with me, I just felt really down (a combo of hair and my life has gone to pot a bit).

I feel better even just thinking about doing it, its so mad! I think going back to the netherlands this weekend made me miss my hair even more as I saw someone who had the shade I used to have mine, so a combo of homesickness for NL and missing who I used to be was what made me edge closer to my scissors (I am so glad I didnt just hack it in a fit of sadness)

[LoveMyLongHair]

I grew all of mine out and left it out for about 4 years........couldn't stand it. I too, am much happier as a blonde......my son was ecstatic when I went back. I had mine pulled through a cap, and it wasn't enough, so I had the stylist go heavier the next time he did it.

SO much happier this way. I just make sure that I take care to keep it treated well, in between.

Go for it gal! It that is what you want.......I'm here with you! We can be blondie partners in crime.........:cheese:

[BrightEyes7]

Do what you want! I am currently trying to grow out years of dye... I don't even know what color my hair is anymore. I see my roots which are about 2 inches now but that isn't an acurate color. So I'm gonna grow my hair out. And if I don't like what I get I'm gonna dye it!

So I say do it... you grew it out, didn't like it. So dye it to something you'll be happy with. What's the point of having the hair if YOU don't love it? And now you're much more hair care savvy so you'll know how to take care of it best!

[lundmir]

Don't apologize. It is your hair, and your choice only! If you have already light hair I don't think there will be much damage. And you can always protect it with coconut oil pre treatments, it is an absolute life saver. Good luck!

[HintOfMint]

Enjoy it and godspeed! Oh and I think there is some information on making bleach less damaging, I think with coconut oil. Maybe it's something to look into.

[Tressie]

Enjoy it and godspeed! Oh and I think there is some information on making bleach less damaging, I think with coconut oil. Maybe it's something to look into.


Good suggestion, and I agree! Do what makes you feel best! :D

[punkcatknitter]

I tried the natural thing too. For two years I grew out my medium blonde hair (from having jet black dyed hair) and while I'm glad I gave it a try (hadn't seen my natural shade in many moons), a couple months ago I decided to henna and am in LOVE. I like my hair so much more now. I know it's kind of the opposite from you, I prefer dark hair, but the principle is the same. Your hair has to make YOU happy, not anyone else.

I also happen to know there are a few dyed blondes on this board with STUNNING long hair. So search around and read up on tips before trying it, but if it's going to make you happy, go for it. :)

[ktani]

You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about, in my opinion. You can have it all with your hair, the colour you want and healthy hair.

This may help, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showpost.php?p=1344549&postcount=388, and this, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showpost.php?p=1346266&postcount=406. See also, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showpost.php?p=1350547&postcount=463, and this http://ktanihairsense.blogspot.com/2009/11/part-1-of-3-part-series-on-innovative.html.
__________________
http://ktanihairsense.blogspot.com/ (http://ktanihairsense.blogspot.com/)

[justgreen]

Carolyn and I have been long time blonde highlighters and wouldn't have it any other way. My hair is currently hip length and I think Carolyn's is almost that long. If you follow the right threads and blogs , you can grow your hair a lot longer than you might think.

[spidermom]

With a goal of waist length, I think you will be able to have your blonde hair and keep it healthy, too. If you had a goal of knee, I'd say NONONONONONO.

[JulietCapulet]

If that is what makes you happy you should not feel guilty.

[Sammich]

Hell no!
I'm dying bleach and pink on my hair! :p
I'm getting over the natural hair thing now, I want pink damnit! :p
:cheese:

[LouLaLa]

Oh my goodnes I cant even tell you how much youve all cheered me up!

Im sorry I havent replied to everyone in turn but I promise I will [after I go dye my hair!] :)

Ive done the coconut oil for 4 hours so im hoping that will help.

Really and truly thankyou, I was going through such a rut with it and I wasnt happy, Ive been uphappy with it since I stopped dying and the feeling didnt go away.

For everyone who posted links and tips too a major thanks!
There are some stunning dyed blonde heads on this forum so I have high hopes (my hair will never be as good, but a girl can try :p)

LHC is amazing :) What would I do without you guys! I do feel better already!

[little_cherry]

I strongly agree with this information! It will save your hair!

You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about, in my opinion. You can have it all with your hair, the colour you want and healthy hair.

This may help, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showpost.php?p=1344549&postcount=388, and this, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showpost.php?p=1346266&postcount=406. See also, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showpost.php?p=1350547&postcount=463, and this http://ktanihairsense.blogspot.com/2009/11/part-1-of-3-part-series-on-innovative.html.
__________________
http://ktanihairsense.blogspot.com/ (http://ktanihairsense.blogspot.com/)

[tigerlily38]

I have been blonde since 91'. I have let my natural color grow back twice, but I always decided later that it wasn't what I wanted. I love being blonde :)

[Igor]

Life is too short to feel miserable about something you can change

Just make sure its really, truly the hair you want to change and you’re not “just” feeling miserable over something else like family, weight, work or partner and is taking it out on something you can change aka your hair

[sleepingIn]

I love blonde hair, I always have and always will. Its beautiful and being a blonde, you understand the level of discipline it entails and how fun it is to see your pretty bright sparkly hair in the mirror shining back at you. Call it barbie syndrome, blondorexia, I dont care - blonde is lovely.

[<3OnHerSleeve]

I'm currently trying to grow my natural hair out, although I'm think once I've done that then I'll get highlights to get a bit of lighter blonde back ;). That's because I've dyed over my hair a million times in different colours so all of my hair has been dyed over and over.

So I suggest, and I am most definitely not against dying hair, that when you do the deed just make sure you only dye the roots after then, that way its a once application on all of your hair instead of dying all of your locks several times over.

Hope you love the result :)

[curlymarcia]

Since you are blonde already I'm sure it won't damage your hair. Remember to use oil before dye it, and a take good care of it. Good luck!

[sleepingIn]

Just be sure when you REDYE that you do *NOT* overlap. THAT is what will break and damage your hair.

There are lots of tutorials on how to retouch roots only...that is key :)

[Jennie80]

You do what you feel like. I was at the hirdresser today and got som hightlights and downlights and my hair is wonderful..She said to me that she had never met someone with my lenght that have so healthy hair..She made my day..My hair now looks more natural swedish blonde..On my avatar my hair is a little trashblonde and I hatede it..Now I´m happy and that`s what counts..
You go girl

[Islandgrrl]

Why would you feel guilty?

It's your hair. You can do with it as you please! It should make you happy!

We're not here to judge you. This isn't a have-long-virgin-hair-even-if-you-hate-it forum! So be happy, dye it to your heart's content! Just remember.....PICTURES OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN! :)

[ktani]

Oh my goodnes I cant even tell you how much youve all cheered me up!

Im sorry I havent replied to everyone in turn but I promise I will [after I go dye my hair!] :)

Ive done the coconut oil for 4 hours so im hoping that will help.

Really and truly thankyou, I was going through such a rut with it and I wasnt happy, Ive been uphappy with it since I stopped dying and the feeling didnt go away.

For everyone who posted links and tips too a major thanks!
There are some stunning dyed blonde heads on this forum so I have high hopes (my hair will never be as good, but a girl can try :p)

LHC is amazing :) What would I do without you guys! I do feel better already!

It should help. A heavy oiling has been reported to work the best. It will not interfere with dye uptake, just the opposite. It is better to use the oil on clarified hair or hair with little residue. The colour is applied directly over your oiled hair.

[jojo]

oooooohhhhhhh my she used the "B" word! ;) at the end of the day your not here to decorate our world, your here to learn how to grow your hair, lots of gone blonde long hairs on here. Heck I even got me some highlights last year but then fancied henna so I did...no big deal do what makes you happy and enjoy it!

[Kathie]

Oh! I cant wait to see the results!! You've been growing your hair natural for a while so I can understand that this is an educated choice after seeing your natural hair color :agree:

[prosperina]

I love blonde hair, just not on me. Even though it is my natural color. :o Are you going to the salon or doing it yourself?

[kabelaced]

In the words of Ralph Emerson: "I wish to say what I think and feel today, with the proviso that tomorrow perhaps I shall contradict it all."

If you want to change something and you think it will make you happy, then go ahead! You're allowed to change your mind! ;) Have a blast!

[Coan-Teen]

Who is your hair for if not yourself? What's the point of taking care of it if it doesn't make you happy? ^_^ Go crazy. Post pictures. I'd love to see.

[GRU]

No judgment here... it's your hair and your life, and if it makes you happy, that's good enough for me!

I henna my grays because it makes me feel good to not see my Paulie Walnuts temples (http://images.forbes.com/media/2007/05/30/sopranos_5.jpg) when I look in the mirror. I have nothing against those who are comfortable being Renegrays... it's just not something that I'm ready for right now. And what's the point of having long hair if you don't like it?

[Katze]

former bottle blonde here who still sometimes longs for it...

the only advice I would give you that others have not so far is that as a FINEhaired person, your hair might not be able to hold up to as much bleaching as someone with M or C hair texture. This has been my problem, since most of my hair is F. But I was mostly bleaching myself with occasional salon visits.

If you are not interested in record-breaking lengths, I think you can go bottle blonde just fine as long as you take good care of your hair otherwise. For me, the yellowish tone I get doesn't look good on me, and toner gets stripped out by all the SMTs I do. But I might get highlights once my new growth has caught up with the rest of my hair...

[Dragon]

You shouldn’t feel guilty. It’s your hair. If it’s going to make you happier I think you should defiantly go ahead with it.

[Dolly]

I say do it and ENJOY!

[Velvettt]

Coat your length with coconut oil. Apply your dye to the roots only. Leave it for longer than the specified time -- I leave mine for 50 minutes rather than the 30 as instructed on the box. Do NOT ever pull through to your ends the way you are told will "refresh" your colour. It will ruin your hair.

I'm just one of many happy bottle blondes here at LHC.

[Nera]

Nooo!!! Why grow out hair that doesn't make you happy!? The whole point of growing out long hair is because you love it for whatever reason. (:

[Nera]

(I mean no, you shouldn't feel guilty at all, not no don't do it!) haha just clearing things up

[jackie75]

I say do it and ENJOY!

I agree! :D I had hair that made me absolutely miserable. If going blond is what will help you love your hair, I say go for it! Learning to love what you have & embracing it just doesn't cut it for a lot people, including me!;)

Have fun & good luck!!

[sophiamarie]

In answer to your post title - Don't feel guilty. Our hair, hair color, hairstyle, etc. is to be enjoyed! Do what makes you feel best about yourself.

[Rivanariko]

Unless you're doing something that is seriously unhealthy for your body (and NOT just your hair) then you should not feel guilty at all! In the same way I don't think people should feel bad or guilty or shunned if they decided that they want layers or shorter hair or strange colors. Your hair is your hair, and the whole point is that it needs to make YOU happy. If you're still hoping for super long hair, then there is a little more babying that you'll need to do to keep it healthy, but it's very possible.

So don't feel guilty! ENJOY your new blond hair!

[LouLaLa]

OK so I did it :D and it looks so so much better!

Thankyou everyone for the support, i promise ill post a before and after once ive done a coconut oil coating and its had chance to settle in a couple of days :)

It got the point where I didnt look at myself in mirrors because I was so unhappy that I didnt look like me.

Wow LHC youre amazing :) xxxx

[aenflex]

Share a pic?????

[Gladtobemom]

Enjoy, do some research, decide on a course, and go for it. Then post pretty pictures and we'll cheer you on.

My philosophy is that we should be able to wear our hair the way that makes us happy. Here at LHC, you can find out all sorts of ways to have exactly what you want in the most healthy way possible.
--------------------------

Oh WOW, I didn't read the end of the thread.
http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i175/Gladtobemom/Smiles/weneedpics_smi.gif

[Lianna]

We can be blondie partners in crime.........:cheese:

I liked that! :cool:


former bottle blonde here who still sometimes longs for it...

the only advice I would give you that others have not so far is that as a FINEhaired person, your hair might not be able to hold up to as much bleaching as someone with M or C hair texture.

... toner gets stripped out by all the SMTs I do.

I have fine and mediums and I see the fine strands get drier when I dye, but with caution we can manage, I think. About SMT's, we might need to microwave the honey, so it doesn't lift the toner, in my case just the dye, resulting in brassiness. I don't own a microwave so I just don't use honey anymore.

I see you did it. I would love to see pics aswell. There's a thread for us bottle blondes: http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=21256

[LouLaLa]

Thanks everyone!

So I went the salon and had it redone and I love it I shall post pics soon. Its alot blonder than I thought it would be but I trusted my hairdresser to have free reign and she did me proud.

Pics very soon, I have the flu atm so when thats gone you can all see my before and after. The hairdresser even took some for her own salon album!

[MadisonMelrose]

I cannot wait to become a blonde again! I decided to give it a break and become a brunette for a while... Easier to grow out damage. Needless to say that I regretted that decision almost instantly. Congrats on your blonder blonde and keep us posted on any tips on keeping it healthy.

I will be blonde again in a year ( I hope).