Boy BARRED from pre-k for having LONG hair

[enivid]

Just wondering if any of y'all read or heard about this yet.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/39952369/ns/today-today_people?gt1=43001

[christine1989]

That is horrible! For goodness sakes, he is growing his hair to donate to kids with cancer! Any school who punishes that should be shut down. :steam

[Druid of Alba]

That principle should be assassinated, haha!

[DARKMARTIAN]

Oh you have got to be kidding me!!! I would say that im amazed that an organization such as that boys school could be so callous......but then again unfortunately.......im not amazed at all. Seems like the typical and social reaction to an act of disregarded kindness. I must say that all too often it would seem that peoples hearts are growing so very cold............but this story warmed my own.

Right on Jack! ;)

[Vermelha]

That's absolutely sad =( What is up with all these "rules" of what is and what isn't acceptable?

[pepperminttea]

Besides from the school's bigoted behaviour, I can't help but think it was the mother who made the decision for him to grow his hair, not him. And I know at that age that's the norm, but still.

[Raekwon]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOL

This is ridiculous, smh, IT'S 2010 for crying out loud. Even Lawyers have dreadlocks reaching down their waist

[TinaDenali]

A school can say how a child wears their hair?? That's a bit far reaching, I think!

[Angeletti]

Those people make me sick, he's adorable and should be allowed to wear his hair however he wants. It makes me wonder what other kinds of things they are discriminating against, they should be ashamed of themselves.

[MandyBeth]

Before everyone goes off the wall....

Child was going to a PRIVATE school. They can and do set their own regulations. Momma should have checked the dress code before she sent kid to school if this was such an issue for her. Looks like she did know the cut was required for Kindergarten, tho' she was made aware also that the rules were changed to include preK in that, and she was given time to work with that.

Don't like the rules, take your kid to a different school. Don't go whining about it.

[MandyBeth]

A school can say how a child wears their hair?? That's a bit far reaching, I think!

Private - absolutely.

Public - that gets iffy. Some do, but how much can they be enforced is up for debate.

[faeriewings]

It's still pretty ridiculous. I mean, is this the 1950s? He looks adorable! Kids should be able to have a good Christian (or otherwise) education without worrying about their hair.

[WinterInBloom]

Snipped from the article:

“This matter is between the parent and the school, and the partnership between the two entities that is critical to a healthy and successful educational experience at St. Dominic School.”


I'm wondering what exactly does long hair have to do with a "healthy and successful educational experience"? I mean, if long hair interferes with those things then they're requiring boys and girls to have buzz cuts right?:rolleyes:

[Qwackie]

I feel for the kid. When I was in fifth grade (I'm a girl, by the way, and it was a public school) they made me cut my tailbone length hair down to a shag and I kept it that way since.
But that's just wrong, I mean, I would've honestly brought up that "Jesus had long hair" or something under that effect.

[PiroskaCicu]

Oh and girls are allowed to have long hair?
Makes no sense to me.

[Peter]

Blatant, outspoken sexism. Happens all the time and it always disgusts me.

[Druid of Alba]

Before everyone goes off the wall....

Child was going to a PRIVATE school. They can and do set their own regulations. Momma should have checked the dress code before she sent kid to school if this was such an issue for her. Looks like she did know the cut was required for Kindergarten, tho' she was made aware also that the rules were changed to include preK in that, and she was given time to work with that.

Don't like the rules, take your kid to a different school. Don't go whining about it.

I'll go whining as much as I'd like! Whether they're private or public, they're still pathetic, for making those ridiculous rules, and they need not live, there's just no need! Just nope!

[jeanniet]

While I think that the school's policy is outdated, the mother did know what the policy was and had agreed to cut his hair, so pitching a fit after the fact is a little histrionic--and if he's getting negative attention over this, who pushed him into the spotlight? I don't agree with the school's stand necessarily, but I think the mother is playing this for attention.

[Masara]

I have to agree that this sounds more like the mother who is out of line on this.

I'm not saying I agree with the no long hair rule for boys (I don't) but from reading the article all the way through it sounds like the school has always had this rule for boys in kindergarten and above and she was aware of that when she registered her son. She even accepted the new ruling for pre-K and was planning on having his hair cut in time but couldn't have it cut because there was a storm. What I couldn't understand from the article was whether this storm prevented the hairdresser from cutting his hair or the media from covering it.

I felt uncomfortable with this article. This child is four years old. His mother decided when he was 16 months old that he would grow and donate his hair. And then she invited the press to see it being cut.
If the whole growing and donating thing was so important to her, why didn't she do it herself? Apart from the probabilty that this hair is not going to be used, it's not actually all that long.

[joiekimochi]

I know I was forced to get a pixie when I decided to rebel against my Asian stick-straight hair and get an afro perm. My homeroom teacher called me out, gave me a lengthy lecture, whipped out the school rule book and then sent me to a salon to get my hair cut off. That was 10 years ago.

In my country, it is the public schools that have the strictest rules on hair and dress codes, while the private schools allow their students to look however they want.

[enfys]

Why get the media involved? Surely she has scissors at home? Charities don't care if the hair was on tv or not. What woukd Jesus do? A flashy attention grabbing donation or a quiet,selfless one?

If she knew and accepted the rules I don't see a difference between not having time to cut his hair and not having time to buy his uniform.

She may have had a point if she had raised this with the school at the time of the rule change.

[Jessica Trapp]

I have to agree that this sounds more like the mother who is out of line on this.

I'm not saying I agree with the no long hair rule for boys (I don't) but from reading the article all the way through it sounds like the school has always had this rule for boys in kindergarten and above and she was aware of that when she registered her son. She even accepted the new ruling for pre-K and was planning on having his hair cut in time but couldn't have it cut because there was a storm. What I couldn't understand from the article was whether this storm prevented the hairdresser from cutting his hair or the media from covering it.

I felt uncomfortable with this article. This child is four years old. His mother decided when he was 16 months old that he would grow and donate his hair. And then she invited the press to see it being cut.
If the whole growing and donating thing was so important to her, why didn't she do it herself? Apart from the probabilty that this hair is not going to be used, it's not actually all that long.

Ditto.

:drama:

[starlights]

Oh the poor boy!!! principle is mean.... unfortunately i found alot of my school teachers WERE meanies!!!!

[Bast]

Well, that really isn't very nice. The boy was allowed until September 30th, what was one or two more days until he was able to get his hair cut?

But yes, going to have to put this one on the mom. She is the one who should have known better, and not tried to make a haircut a media circus. Had it been part of a St. Baldricks event, sure, I can see a couple people there, but for that? Yeahhhh...

Although I will agree, I do think that some dress codes are becoming slightly over-the-top.

[JayLee]

I just keep asking myself why the mother imposed her son to grow his hair. Why not grow her own hair. This is definately all for the attention IMHO.

[wackyredtangles]

You don't want your kids to have gender roles forced upon them, don't send them to Christian/Catholic schools.

Really now. I went to Catholic school for a few years, and while I got a decent enough education and certainly don't regret, they were a bit over the top on the whole gender thing. Very clear line of demarkation for the dresses. Boys were allowed to run, girls had to skip. Part of our uniform stated heels had to be at least 1/2". Boys held open doors, and did "boy" classroom cleanup chores. Girls did "girls" classroom cleanup chores. Sex ed (not real sex ed, the what your body is going through sex ed) and gym were segregated by gender.

Generally when you send your kids to private school you're paying not just for the education, but for a whole belief system and lifestyle for your kids to grow up. Don't like it, don't send them there. Done.

[isbmlamloi]

The topic of gender norms in hair is really interesting. I wonder what the school's policy is on girls with buzz cuts?

I really hope the boy gets through this relatively unscathed, and ends up at a school where he can grow his hair whether he wants to or not!

[Toadstool]

Ridiculous rule. Pupils should be allowed to wear their hair as they or their parents please.

[RecklessCharlie]

Quite possibly the most INANE thing I have ever read. Where to these people get off?! Its just HAIR. The people in charge of that school need to gain some serious perspective on what is a big deal and what isn't.
Unbelievable.
And don't get me started on the mother in this situation. Ridiculous.

[embee]

Private schools have their rules. If you don't like them, choose another school.

The whole thing is stupidly overblown and attnetion grabbing anyway. Mom knows the rules and does not follow them. So she goes public? TV and news and all? Bah. :(

Poor kid. What a mess. Now he'll have "a name" and other kids (and parents) will be able to pick on him. Geez.

Personally, I think the rule is a bit silly - for a 4 year old kid, gimme a break! But the mom *chose* this battle.

[heidihug]

Whether they're private or public, they're still pathetic, for making those ridiculous rules, and they need not live, there's just no need! Just nope!
"Need not live"? Really? You claim this story is over the top, but that comment is even moreso.

As others have said - private school, their rules, you don't like 'em, enroll your kid in a different school. The mother is an attention-seeker, using her child to manipulate the media. That is disgusting to me.

[Caldonia Sun]

Much ado about nothing. If she wants a private school, then she needs to adhere to the rules. Simple.

[ravenreed]

The mother was willing to cut his hair before the deadline, but changed her mind when the press couldn't make it? Right.

[CurlAhead]

This made me so angry..discrimination is what it is?

[baaaad_kitty]

Hmm... where I'm from, all the schools require boys to have a specific hair style. Nothing touching the tops of the ears, no going below the eyebrows. She should just choose a different school

[little_cherry]

Wow...how......disgusting!


"Jesus had long hair"

I rest my case. ;)

[mali]

That was awfull especially coming from a CATHOLIC which means CHRISTIAN school.THE BIBLE it's self teaches about ''not judging a book by it's cover.''And they call themselves christian?! Well,that may be outside MY area,because I'm an atheist,but isn't the CHRISTIAN school supposed to follow the teachings of THE BIBLE?Seriously.I think they are wrong.What if a boy has long hair?What's wrong with that?! Are they afraid that by having long hair he's going to turn homosexual?!What's wrong with being homosexual(if he did turn,but having long feet doesn't make you taller).I simply do not understand their way of understanding the Bible and things that are related to it.He was doing it to honour his grandfather.I think that is one of the most kind things ever.I think he and his mom are TRULY religious,not the so-called CATHOLIC pre-k.Some people are as**s these days...But I also agree with Heidihug :

"Need not live"? Really? You claim this story is over the top, but that comment is even moreso.

As others have said - private school, their rules, you don't like 'em, enroll your kid in a different school. The mother is an attention-seeker, using her child to manipulate the media. That is disgusting to me.

[BrightEyes7]

This makes me so mad... the school even knew why he had long hair!!!

[Lamb]

"Szablewski was all set to do that Sept. 30, she said, and even invited the media to cover the clipping at a Hoboken salon."

A very convenient storm a day before the deadline she was given well in advance... Sorry, I call bullsh!t. And I'll bet every 4-year-old would be thrilled to have his/her haircut subjected to media coverage on site. Not.

:puke:

This woman is using her son to get all the attention she can, and to pick all the fights she can. If she feels so strongly about hair and cancer, why doesn't she grow her own and donate it? Oh, but then, a KID doing it is soooo much cuter and effective, right? :rolleyes: And I can always rely on public sympathy if my kid is called names, even if that is the consequence of my own actions, right? :rolleyes:
Give me a break. She did this to her own son, not the school. This "mother" makes me sick, but then, most attention-grabbing people do.

[TrudieCat]

As many others have said, Mom's using her son to get attention. :puke: This doesn't sound like a case of a child choosing to grow long hair, but rather being told by his mom to grow long hair. Poor kid. :( His hair is not long enough for any of the hair donation programs to use anyway. This is a big fake-a-roo media stunt.

I will be happy if/when it becomes more culturally acceptable for boys and girls to choose to wear whatever hairstyles they themselves prefer. That said, private schools have all kinds of rules regarding appearance and dress, not just for hair but for length of skirt for girls, types of acceptable shoes, types of acceptable socks, etc. Not my cup of tea, which is why I won't be sending my kids (if I have them) to private school. But really, why the outcry over hair and not the fact that Jr. doesn't get to pick the color or cut of his school shirts? I don't see much of a difference. :shrug: No one's forcing Mom to send Jr. to this particular private school.

[Angelica]

First off that is one very good looking, photogenic boy! His hair is gorgeous too.

I doubt very much that the school would be dictating that the boy should cut his hair if he had grown it for religious reasons. This is the point that really gets my back up. They are not enrolling for the army, they are going to school. If there are issues about long hair, usually schools say that it has to be tied back for health and safety reasons.

I have never heard that schools behave in this manner and it is appalling.

It is worth noting also that it was a fashion for boys to have long hair in the 70s and none of the schools tried to dictate that they cut their hair. There was one boy in my brother's class who had nice waist length hair - and by the way it was a Catholic school we all went to.

I think it is wrong to attack the mother like this. Her motives may well be honourable, and she obviously thinks highly of her son. The boy seems happy in the photos.

I know the idea of donating hair is not very appealling here, but having watched a day time programme regarding a little girl who was bald I do think differently about it. I don't know how they obtained the hair for the wig, but because she had a skin condition she had to have a real hair wig and she was so happy when she was fitted with one. They gave it to her free of charge.

Provided nobody is forced to cut their hair for donation, I think it is okay. If it makes other children like that little girl happy then that's brilliant.

Of course there are synthetic wigs around and they have improved a lot, but like I said for some reason that child could only have a real hair wig. It was explained on the show but I can't remember.

It does sound in this instance that the mother is going to cut the child's hair at some point in time. In the meantime the school should not be laying down rules and just concentrating on the education.

Yes the mother can choose a different school, but perhaps she considered this school the best in the area.

[McFearless]

That was awfull especially coming from a CATHOLIC which means CHRISTIAN school.THE BIBLE it's self teaches about ''not judging a book by it's cover.''And they call themselves christian?! Well,that may be outside MY area,because I'm an atheist,but isn't the CHRISTIAN school supposed to follow the teachings of THE BIBLE?Seriously.I think they are wrong.What if a boy has long hair?What's wrong with that?! Are they afraid that by having long hair he's going to turn homosexual?!What's wrong with being homosexual(if he did turn,but having long feet doesn't make you taller).I simply do not understand their way of understanding the Bible and things that are related to it.He was doing it to honour his grandfather.I think that is one of the most kind things ever.I think he and his mom are TRULY religious,not the so-called CATHOLIC pre-k.Some people are as**s these days...But I also agree with Heidihug :


I don't understand what you mean by "that was awful especially coming from a catholic school".

I would be just as shocked if this was coming from someone under another religion. Christianity is not the only teacher or love.

Anyway I'm with the school on this one. They have rules they are allowed to stand up. If they weren't disclosed upon registration I would understand the mother's anger. I also doubt the boy wants his hair this long. The mom should grow her hair out and donate it.

[McFearless]

First off that is one very good looking, photogenic boy! His hair is gorgeous too.

I doubt very much that the school would be dictating that the boy should cut his hair if he had grown it for religious reasons. This is the point that really gets my back up. They are not enrolling for the army, they are going to school. If there are issues about long hair, usually schools say that it has to be tied back for health and safety reasons.

I have never heard that schools behave in this manner and it is appalling.

It is worth noting also that it was a fashion for boys to have long hair in the 70s and none of the schools tried to dictate that they cut their hair. There was one boy in my brother's class who had nice waist length hair - and by the way it was a Catholic school we all went to.

I think it is wrong to attack the mother like this. Her motives may well be honourable, and she obviously thinks highly of her son. The boy seems happy in the photos.

I know the idea of donating hair is not very appealling here, but having watched a day time programme regarding a little girl who was bald I do think differently about it. I don't know how they obtained the hair for the wig, but because she had a skin condition she had to have a real hair wig and she was so happy when she was fitted with one. They gave it to her free of charge.

Provided nobody is forced to cut their hair for donation, I think it is okay. If it makes other children like that little girl happy then that's brilliant.

Of course there are synthetic wigs around and they have improved a lot, but like I said for some reason that child could only have a real hair wig. It was explained on the show but I can't remember.

It does sound in this instance that the mother is going to cut the child's hair at some point in time. In the meantime the school should not be laying down rules and just concentrating on the education.

Yes the mother can choose a different school, but perhaps she considered this school the best in the area.


I think most people here just have a problem with Locks of Love, not the concept of donation. Donating hair is a wonderful thing.

[mali]

I don't understand what you mean by "that was awful especially coming from a catholic school".

I would be just as shocked if this was coming from someone under another religion. Christianity is not the only teacher or love.

Anyway I'm with the school on this one. They have rules they are allowed to stand up. If they weren't disclosed upon registration I would understand the mother's anger. I also doubt the boy wants his hair this long. The mom should grow her hair out and donate it.

Of course there are other religions teaching of love.But Christianity is one of the most strict religions,according to ''people'' who read the Old Testament.And what I said with :
"...that was awful especially coming from a catholic school". was that Chatolicism is stricter than Orthodoxy,and because they are so strict they only accept(not all Christians of course) what's the norm.I'm sorry but the school doesn't exactly have a point with cutting long hair,but the mom shouldn't have called the PRESS.It's simple as flying pigs.

I don't wish to talk about religion anymore.People have different oppinions and I don't want to argue about them.Who really knows what's out there,right? P.S: The boy kind of looks like a girl.But he's cute!:thumbsup:

[Juneii]

He looks like a young girl with that long hair.

As much as we want to turn a blind eye to it and assume that everyone is as wonderful and understanding as we think we are society is not kind. If a young boy were to go to school with his hair style closely resembling what a girl would wear he will be made fun of. Children bully each other over smaller things. Being bullied can have a negative impact on a child's ability to grow and develop.
And like others have said before it's a PRIVATE school. Parents pay a lot of money for their children to get the best education. Proper dress code and following rules is one of them.

[xoLegallyAubrey]

This is ridiculous. If anything, the school should be encouraging him!

[McFearless]

Of course there are other religions teaching of love.But Christianity is one of the most strict religions,according to ''people'' who read the Old Testament.And what I said with : was that Chatolicism is stricter than Orthodoxy,and because they are so strict they only accept(not all Christians of course) what's the norm.I'm sorry but the school doesn't exactly have a point with cutting long hair,but the mom shouldn't have called the PRESS.It's simple as flying pigs.

I definately agree with everyone having the right to the hair they choose. I don't think that little boy chose his hairstyle, but as far as the school knows he did and yet they don't accept it. Long hair is still seen as "feminine" and these private schools have strict rules you must follow.
I think he is better suited to a public school.

[mali]

Me thinks so too.

[Vermelha]

He looks like a young girl with that long hair.

As much as we want to turn a blind eye to it and assume that everyone is as wonderful and understanding as we think we are society is not kind. If a young boy were to go to school with his hair style closely resembling what a girl would wear he will be made fun of. Children bully each other over smaller things. Being bullied can have a negative impact on a child's ability to grow and develop.
And like others have said before it's a PRIVATE school. Parents pay a lot of money for their children to get the best education. Proper dress code and following rules is one of them.

Juneii, you make a good point.

But then too, kids are bullied for other things too; things they cannot help, like having curly hair, or having freckles, or being darker skinned and other things...you could have a cheap pair of shoes on and be made fun of.

BUT, if it was a part of the rules to have what is considered "groomed" hair, then it makes sense to be expected, albeit sad.

[Sunsailing]

I agree that the mother knew about the rules ahead of time. She has no leg to stand on.

But...

Rules help to meet a set of goals and objectives. What goal or objective is met by a boy having short hair?

I teach. I used to believe that students shouldn't have wild colors of hair because it was distracting to other students. Over my many years of teaching, I've come to realize that the only one who is possibly distracted might be the teacher. We got rid of most non-essential school rules many years ago.

I attended Catholic schools 1-12. I am an active member of my parish and a member of K of C. I am not rejected by my parish nor the K of C due to my long hair. Yet, I would be rejected to teach in some Catholic schools because of my hair, regardless of my teaching credentials?

I am a supporter of public and Catholic schools. But things like this add up to why Catholic school enrollment is on a decline.

[beez1717]

This story sucks all around. I especially for the kid. I think the kid should have the final say as to what should be done to his own hair. It's his head and hair. I let him do what he wants! I as a young kid, besides I would have grown out my hair if that is what I had wanted. Too bad I thought I was to have short hair because I thought I couldn't handle long hair care. How wrong I think I would have been!

[Katze]

wow, they could never try that here, half the boys in our neighborhood have long hair (including one probably 14-ish kid with shoulder length, super thick, super curly ORANGE hair...)

My son's friend, now 17, had long dark blonde dreads when I met him when he was 11, and he did look a bit like a girl. Now he is a very handsome young man.

Some peoples' antiquated ideas of gender norms are really sad...

[Jules diamond]

Someone was jealous that his hair was nicer then theirs.... :p