Hair frustrations.

[~bear]

I'm pretty new here. I stumbled on this place while researching hair shedding. I've been lurking for awhile. I think the shedding is slowing but it still feels like a lot. It's been going on for a couple months now. It is hard not to obsess about it but I am trying. My hair feels thinner but my circumference doesn't seem to have decreased significantly. I've had my levels tested and do take thyroid meds but all was normal except vitamin D. I've been taking a supplement for a few weeks now. I been experimenting with not using SLS and cones and have added jojoba oil and coconut oil in the mix. I've been trying CWC as well. My wavy hair has responded well and has been less frizzy and much softer as a result. My hair isn't damaged. I occasionally blow fry just the top but primarily let it air dry.

My hair was past APL with long layers (past chin length) and long bangs and after spending time here, learning a lot, incorporating new things that have definitely had a positive impact on my hair and seeing all of you with the lovely locks I thought I'd let mine grow for a while. No commitment on final length but aiming for BSL first. I decided to proceed as planned with getting a little trim as my ends were looking thin and with the stress I've felt from the shedding I thought maybe having it look a bit thicker would make me feel better. My normal hairdresser left unexpectedly. I made an appointment with the woman she recommended. (Mistake #1? lol) We talked first. I told her what I wanted, minimal trim to thicken up my ends so the bottom wasn't so U shaped. She seemed to understand, showed me how much she'd cut. An inch at best. She trimmed the bottom and then suddenly there were 3 inches here and there coming off my layers. Not what I asked for at all. Ended up with barely APL but with way too much layering in the top and thinner amount in the length. Apparently her definition of long layers starts a lip length where as my idea is longer than chin length.

I should have stopped her and left but the shedding honestly has left me feeling a bit vulnerable and blue in the hair department so I let her continue. That seems silly but I'm pretty sure this crowd will understand. She may cut well but listens horribly and now I feel I'm back to starting over with a layer length I've had before and hated (hello! wavy hair and shorter layers) and having to trim my length periodically (not by her!) while the layers grow out since it seems so top heavy now. boo.

Sorry to ramble; just needed to share this with a supportive group that I knew would understand. The husband is tired of hearing about my hair rants. :p

How have you dealt with hair set backs?

[spidermom]

When I'm not happy with my hair for any reason, I avoid looking at it as much as possible and get busy with other things. At your length, it should work pretty well to just finger-comb it away from your face with gelled fingers (styling gel or aloe vera gel) and let it do what it will. It sounds too short to put up, but if you can put it up in some way (a french twist maybe?), then do that. Out of sight, out of mind, and just let it grow for as long as you can stand it, then get a SMALL trim to even things out a bit.

[tinti]

I'm sorry you have to go through this. Hairdressers who doesn't listen is not a rare thing, I think. My mom is a hairdressers and trims my hair. She doesn't care what I want, she just wants everyone to look "unique and different", and so she loves lots of layers on me, and I didn't because they were impossible to style because I couldn't style them plus I was a wavy without knowing it :lol: So no more layers for me!

I really don't have any advice when it comes to the shedding, but I can at least offer a :grouphug: Plus, putting up the hair untill your hair is more how you want it is a good idea, that's what I'm TRYING to do, just put it up and forget about it untill my layers are more willing to be as I want them to.

[virgo75]

I'm sorry you're going through this. :(

My vitamin D was/is low as well and I started taking a liquid supplement from The Vitamin Shoppe and my shedding has cut waaaaaaaaay down. I was losing about 50 hairs a day(or more when I washed), now I lose maybe 20 at most - even when I wash. It may take a while, but the vitamin D did help. :agree:

As for the unhappy haircut - this is gonna sound stupid - but I actually had my hair cut a little wonky the last time just so I would leave it alone. :lol:

When it's perfectly even I get obsessed with it being perfectly even and end up getting more trims than I need. When it's already got small layers and is even a little uneven here and there I can't help but to be less obssessive and leave it alone because it takes a lot longer to see that it's growing unevenly when it was uneven to begin with. :lol:

Doing as Spidermom suggests and putting it up so I don't have to look at it or think about it....

How do I deal with setbacks: deep conditioning. lol
Instead of washing my hair too much I take the time to deep condition instead.
When I want to trim, I deep condition instead.
When I want to change the style, cut, or color, I deep condition instead.

That way I can play with it, but I'm keeping it healthy and letting grow out. :)

Happy hair growing. :flower:

[angelfell]

Well, the good news is, if you had any significant damage towards the ends (which maybe you didn't.. I do.. boo :( lol ) .. it's all gone, right? Sort of a fresh start.. almost. Heh. I always try to look on the bright side. Also.. hair always grows back right?

My setback is my hair keeps breaking off from perm damage. Eww.

[~bear]

Thank you all! :) I know there is a bright side. I'll find it once I get over the initial 'argh!'

I can still put it up thankfully. I have a side part and the layering on the side my bangs sweep to is shorter and fuller. The other side seems to still be chin length. I will see how it dries naturally next time I wash. I fear the wonky poof. haha.

virgo75 - how long did it take before you noticed a decrease in shedding with D? That is good news that it helped you.

[Sooze]

Hello Bear.

First of all, I just wanted to say your hair in your avatar pic looks beautiful - it's a gorgeous colour and looks in good condition.

Second, unfortunate though your hairdressing experience was (and we've all had them!) your hair will grow again (although I know from experience that won't be anywhere as quickly as you'd like it to be!) Am in a similar position as, in desperation a few months back I had mine cut to jaw length in an effort to get rid of damage. In reality, I needn't have done that (would that I'd known about The Long Hair Community back then :mad:)

I would maybe try a biotin supplement (not kelp as you already have some thyroid issues) for a couple of months or so to help with the shedding, although it doesn't sound excessive.

My hubby is also sick of me moaning about my hair, and with all the money I used to spend on rubbish hoping to try and make it something it will never be again. Then I found this place, and it was like a wonderfully inviting pair of comfy slippers, with loads of good advice, friendly people and brilliant ideas. I began to try them out, and they did more for me - virtually free - than anything else I'd bothered with. :joy:

Am also just rediscovering putting my hair up - and it's shorter and more layered than yours looks - and that helps to take my mind off its shortcomings at the moment. I love Virgo75's ideas for "dealing" with it - think I'll have to try that myself! :laugh:

[virgo75]

Thank you all! :) I know there is a bright side. I'll find it once I get over the initial 'argh!'

I can still put it up thankfully. I have a side part and the layering on the side my bangs sweep to is shorter and fuller. The other side seems to still be chin length. I will see how it dries naturally next time I wash. I fear the wonky poof. haha.

virgo75 - how long did it take before you noticed a decrease in shedding with D? That is good news that it helped you.


First, I will say that my doctor wanted to prescribe some Vitamin D tablest that were 50,000 Iu to be taken once a week for 6-8 weeks, then I could cut back after that. My insurance didn't cover the tablets so I bought this instead:

http://www.vitaminshoppe.com/store/en/browse/sku_detail.jsp?fromCatId=cat10025&id=VS-2714

I took 10 drops per day, 5 days per week for 2 months. I'd say I noticed a slight difference after a couple of weeks and where I'm at now(20 hairs max per day) after 1 full month. Now I take it when I remember to, but not that much.

Each drop contains 1000Iu of Vitamin D.
So I might take 5 drops one day a week or whenever I remember. I've been forgetting lately but my hair is still not shedding how it used to be.

I'm due to go back and get my vitamin D levels re-tested but haven't made the appointment yet. :oops:

Hope that helps. :flower:

P.S. My starting Vitamin D blood level was I think '6'. A level over '30' is optimal, over '15' is acceptable. I would check with your doctor to make sure the supplement and amount you take is ok. Mine was fine with it.

[bonnie1735]

This is just a funny but at my house, hair is not to be discussed at the dinner table per my family. But on the good side, if you can get your hair up, put it up and forget about it. I went from a pixie cut to waist length, not once but three times!!!

[JuneBride]

I'm pretty new here. I stumbled on this place while researching hair shedding. I've been lurking for awhile. I think the shedding is slowing but it still feels like a lot. It's been going on for a couple months now. It is hard not to obsess about it but I am trying. My hair feels thinner but my circumference doesn't seem to have decreased significantly. I've had my levels tested and do take thyroid meds but all was normal except vitamin D. I've been taking a supplement for a few weeks now. I been experimenting with not using SLS and cones and have added jojoba oil and coconut oil in the mix. I've been trying CWC as well. My wavy hair has responded well and has been less frizzy and much softer as a result. My hair isn't damaged. I occasionally blow fry just the top but primarily let it air dry.

My hair was past APL with long layers (past chin length) and long bangs and after spending time here, learning a lot, incorporating new things that have definitely had a positive impact on my hair and seeing all of you with the lovely locks I thought I'd let mine grow for a while. No commitment on final length but aiming for BSL first. I decided to proceed as planned with getting a little trim as my ends were looking thin and with the stress I've felt from the shedding I thought maybe having it look a bit thicker would make me feel better. My normal hairdresser left unexpectedly. I made an appointment with the woman she recommended. (Mistake #1? lol) We talked first. I told her what I wanted, minimal trim to thicken up my ends so the bottom wasn't so U shaped. She seemed to understand, showed me how much she'd cut. An inch at best. She trimmed the bottom and then suddenly there were 3 inches here and there coming off my layers. Not what I asked for at all. Ended up with barely APL but with way too much layering in the top and thinner amount in the length. Apparently her definition of long layers starts a lip length where as my idea is longer than chin length.

I should have stopped her and left but the shedding honestly has left me feeling a bit vulnerable and blue in the hair department so I let her continue. That seems silly but I'm pretty sure this crowd will understand. She may cut well but listens horribly and now I feel I'm back to starting over with a layer length I've had before and hated (hello! wavy hair and shorter layers) and having to trim my length periodically (not by her!) while the layers grow out since it seems so top heavy now. boo.

Sorry to ramble; just needed to share this with a supportive group that I knew would understand. The husband is tired of hearing about my hair rants. :p

How have you dealt with hair set backs?

I feel your pain and have dealth with hair set backs in the past. I fried my hair with bleach in 2009 and I am just now recovering from it! See my profile and albums for that story! I think finding the LHC both you and I have found support. I know for me, I always thought I was the only one that obbssessed over my hair and people thought I was weird. But it is part of you, it is part of who you are and what you represent to others. It's your most valued accressory, if you will. I, too, stumbled upon the LHC when I was researching damaged hair and what to do to fix it, etc. I was shocked and absolutely thrilled to find an entire community devoted to a very important thing in my life, filled with people that understand exactly what I am going through. And in the short time I have been here, I have seen a miracle! I USED TO SHED LIKE CRAZY!!! now I CO and have noticed a dramatic reduction in shed!!! I have discovered that shampoo and my hair do not get along!

I am glad you found the LHC, I hope it does for you, what it has done for me.

One piece of advice: Next time you need a trim, research your community for a long hair stylist specialist, and go for a consultation (NO CUTTING) and explain to her what is going on and that you want a micro trim. Hopefully she too will have long hair and will understand and heed your request.

Before I go, I just want to say a few more things, from reading the LHC boards, I can tell that we really don't need as many trims as hairdressers always preach. One or 2 good trims a year, coupled with the maintainence techniques you will learn here, should keep your hair in amazing condition!!!!!!! And I think that some (not a lot) of layers are ok ;)

Good Luck! :pumpkin:

[~bear]

Thank you all! I should have posted long ago and before today's hair cut fiasco as you've made me feel mo' better!

Sooze - thank you! My avatar is from a few months ago, freshly hennaed. Layers are shorter now but no shorter than they've been before. I know it will grow. I've been reading about Biotin and considering it. May try it after I give the few new vitamins I've started a chance to kick in.

[~bear]

And boo, I took a photo. Good to have a starting point but seeing the back, she clearly didn't do what I asked.

Hope you can see these - my photos on Flickr but marked private so I'm using the link.

Before:
http://flickr.com/gp/bear__/R39977

After:
http://flickr.com/gp/bear__/6df1tb

How is that making my ends thicker? lol

[JuneBride]

And boo, I took a photo. Good to have a starting point but seeing the back, she clearly didn't do what I asked.

Hope you can see these - my photos on Flickr but marked private so I'm using the link.

Before:
http://flickr.com/gp/bear__/R39977

After:
http://flickr.com/gp/bear__/6df1tb

How is that making my ends thicker? lol

I see what you mean and why you are upset, I had the same exact thing happen...but in a way in my case it had to because I needed to get rid of damage.

Either why you have gorgeous hair!!!!!!!!!!!! Just take care of it, and it will grow back and thicken up before you know it!!!

[~bear]

Thank you, JuneBride.

I let it air dry today and it is even more clear to me now that the woman had not a clue how to deal with wavy hair. It looks like I have two separate hair cuts. I've been looking at hair forks all day. I don't wear my hair up very often but I think perhaps I deserve a pretty hair toy and it may inspire me to put it up more and forget about it. ;)

No more cuts for me for a good long while.

[JuneBride]

Thank you, JuneBride.

I let it air dry today and it is even more clear to me now that the woman had not a clue how to deal with wavy hair. It looks like I have two separate hair cuts. I've been looking at hair forks all day. I don't wear my hair up very often but I think perhaps I deserve a pretty hair toy and it may inspire me to put it up more and forget about it. ;)

No more cuts for me for a good long while.

You definitely deserve a treat :pumpkin:
I have been there before with the look of 2 cuts, it happens a lot with layers, that is why if you ever gets layers again, you must ask them to be "blended" ;)
But it will all grow back and in the meantime you an research hairdressers and go for no-cut consultations :cool: