Getting no support on growing hair out

[yvsa]

I'm getting a bit discouraged. People start to notice that I'm trying to grow out my pixie hair. And everyone is kind of negative about it. They all say I look much better with short hair:( (I've tried growing out my hair many many times and never succeeded, always gave up in the akward fase between earlob and nape). People are making fun of my "badwings" that I have on the sides, due to my wavy hair. To be honest the wings drive me insane too;). Sometimes I try to tame them with hairclips but then I'm being made fun off. People say I look funny with them (and not in a good way:disgust:). I'm not loaded with much selfconfidence to begin with so all this negativity about my appearance is not helping. I know I don't look at my best right now and it's gowing to take a loooooong time before my hair will look good again. I know myself, this negativity will get to me and then I always end up cutting it in a pixie again. And then regret it shortly after:confused: (but doing it again and again). I know it is something I will have to deal with myself but maybe there are people who have some advice for me?

[kabelaced]

You should check out the Super-Shorties thread! :) Lots of support and awesome people there.

I've been growing out a buzz since late April, and have gotten tons of people telling me that my hair looks great this short, that I should always keep it this way, etc. - and some of these people have known me when I used to have long hair.

Thank them for complimenting your hair as it is now, and leave it at that. And if they try to tell you to keep your hair short when you don't want to (like I have), well...hear them speaking, but don't listen!! ;)

Happy growing!! :cheer:

[Mexibeach]

Well, I would grow it out if I were you. Only then can you see if you like having long hair! Now, what I have been doing with those lovely side wings and all other lovely surprises at this length is wearing various hair things. If you have some extra cash - invest in hair bandanas (my favorite in these circumstances), head bands in various colors to match every outfit ;) and nice slouchy hats! (clips and pins are great too but I find my hair is too short to use them yet...) Now also, I say slouchy hats cuz I simply can't wear hats - nothing looks good on me. If you can pull off other kinds of hats, go for it!!! You will get past this stage soon enough - but I know, it will feel like forever!!!!!! Once past that stage - the rest is easy. I find that as my hair inches ever closer to shoulder length - and begins to look longer - then I don't focus so much on it! Hope this helps and GOOD LUCK!!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!! :D

[young&reckless]

You"ll find lots of support on this site. For me when I was that length headbands and hats were my best friends. Don't be afraid to try new things.

Good luck with your growing journey.

[SpinDance]

Perhaps some fun scarves, bands or hats would distract them? It is often hard for others to realize that what they are used to seeing is not always what the person they are looking at wants, and that it is really none of their business how you wear your hair.

If clips aren't working very well for you, and I know they can be a real pain, maybe some interesting braids might do the trick?

[Alexannee10]

Hold on ! ♥
Don't let people make fun of your hair. This should be the hardest part to grow .. Let your hair grow CL or APL , and then, make fun of them and prove them that you're prettier with long hair ;)

[luthien_belewen]

I completely understand as I grew out my pixie! The in between stage is incredibly awkward. Once I grew to chin length, I had it cut into a bob and it looked much more...normal. Also, this little article kind of helped me out: http://modernmagik.blogspot.com/2008/05/pixie-cut-growing-out.html

Try blow-drying your ends outward in a flip (I know blow drying is bad...but this seriously helped me growing out a pixie!). For some reason, this was the best style for me growing out...rather than just let my hair fall limply around my ears. Also, I curled it...curling the hair kind of hides all those pesky layers, and blends them. I used hot rollers (I know...bad...but in the growing out stage...you just have to...), and then kind of arranged the curls into barrettes and hair pins. It looked cute and vintage!

Once I was able to do a pony tail or a half up...I was sooo happy! You'll get there! Find some good styles that work for you!

[keepmyhair]

Hello yvsa,

It's your hair so you should wear it the way you like it.

Just smile and ignore them. Perhaps they cannot offer support, so they make fun. Say to yourself "it doesn't matter", and go on with your work. Smiling will probably make them stop, and it will also help keep your negativity away.

If you feel like cutting your hair because of their comments, tell yourself... "it's just a matter of a few more months, after which your hair will be long enough to tame".

Good luck... and keep going.

[DavidN]

You can count on our support here at the LHC, Yvsa, and please ignore those naysayers! Best of luck to you in your hair growing journey.

[MsBubbles]

What business is it of anybody else whether you are growing out a short haircut?! You must still be very young. This seems to happen to younger people a lot, that friends & relatives consider it open-season to say whatever they feel like about their hair.

At my age I generally freeze people with a Clint-Eastwood glare, just daring them to pick a fight with me about my hair...

If you don't start any conversations IRL about your hair at all to any of them, sooner or later they'll get the message that talking about your hair is off-limits.

Good luck! What you do with your hair is your business, not theirs.

ETA: I see you're not a teenager or early 20s! Sorry. so yeah...I wouldn't start any conversations about my hair or ask anybody's opinion. I learned that lesson!!

[excentricat]

Growing out from a pixie is going to be awkward, since you have this short, styled cut that kind of gets weedy before it gets nice again. Of course they'll say they like short hair better than your in-between stage. Who knows what long hair will look like on you. And anyway who cares what they think. Grow it out, if it gets long and you decide you really truely don't like it after its gotten out of awkward, well, its still cuttable. Meanwhile, good luck and much growth.

[Amraann]

Who the heck are these people saying such mean things to you?
Did you ask for their opinion?
Are they in 8th grade?

[JayLee]

I find that a great motivation is to keep a photo of someone with hair that you love with you. Everytime you get bad talk from loved ones or that you feel that you need that extra esteem look at it and you will remember what you are doing this for.
This is helping me grow through the weird stages.

[PiroskaCicu]

I've also grown out my hair from a pixie...and the only advice I can give is hold on tight, be patient and try and enjoy the ride!! My hair is now at 20 inches and when I was still growing out the pixie it was really hard, I often wanted to cut it but....it really helps to just enjoy it while it's short, try to do different things with it, without cutting. Also, once it hit shoulder or even chin for me, I gave it a nice trim so that it would grow out more evenly. This helped a lot in the growing out process.

[Fadedbluedreams]

Please hang in there!! I just grew out of a bob and it took forever... it was awkward but I'm finally at shoulder length and what a relief. You'll never get where you want to be if you allow all the negativity to influence your actions. Think about it as an investment: You're putting in time and patience now to reap your desire later. Hope that helps :)

[hanne jensen]

:blossom::grouphug:Yvsa, hang in there! Growing out a pixie IS awkward, we've all been there. Have you thought of some cute bandanas, or hats?

Before you know it, you'll be able to do a half-up and then a pony or a sock bun. That awkward stage seems to take forever, but it's really only a few months.

[Mexibeach]

I have another idea. When I grew my hair out last time it was shorter (never as short as it is now mind - but the front was shorter, with wee bangs) I used to part it in the middle and take wee little elastics (that my daughter uses in her Barbies hair) just to take the front on each side and tie it back. That worked well too! And now that I've typed that, you know I'm trying it this weekend!!! Having someone else to struggle through this stage with always inspires me to get through it myself!!!:disco:

[cleanbug]

I too was a pixie! I have actually cut & grown out my hair many times & almost have it down to a science.
Lots of gel, always used bobby pins to secure bangs or make little twists in the front w/ the pins.
My biggest challenge was to grow out my hair along with my bangs. I've had long hair several times but always had short bangs. The toughest for me was when the bangs were long enough to be in your eyes but not long enough to hook over the ear.
As another poster mentioned, you can always cut it later if you don't like it but keep growing it for now and see how long you can get it.
here's a few pics from my journey:
(some of the pics may be huge)
http://ilovehenna.tripod.com/imagelib/sitebuilder/misc/show_image.html?linkedwidth=560&linkpath=http://ilovehenna.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/.pond/blond2.jpg.w560h601.jpg&target=tlx_new

http://ilovehenna.tripod.com/imagelib/sitebuilder/misc/show_image.html?linkedwidth=actual&linkpath=http://ilovehenna.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/img_1263.jpg&target=tlx_new

http://ilovehenna.tripod.com/imagelib/sitebuilder/misc/show_image.html?linkedwidth=actual&linkpath=http://ilovehenna.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/b.jpg&target=tlx_new

[little_cherry]

You can count on our support here at the LHC, Yvsa, and please ignore those naysayers! Best of luck to you in your hair growing journey.
Yes!! I agree with DavidN! Words of wisdom!

You're here to decorate your own world, not theirs :flower:
I wish you a wonderful hair growing journey!

[AspenSong]

Once upon a time my hair was nearly as short as yours so I feel your pain in the growing out process. *hugs*
First of all, IGNORE everyone who has anything bad to say about your hair. You know why? Because it's YOUR hair!!! :) If you want it long, then be strong and just keep growing! Show them all that you DO look good with long, healthy hair! You'll regret it more if you give in and go along with others, than if you stick it out.
I know short hair is so awkward to grow out, but I'd say take advatage of it. You can get creative with short hair and there's so many cute pins and headbands and beautiful silk scarves out there, use them to your advantage.
Plus, being that your hair is so short you probably have no damage to deal with at the moment so it's a great chance to baby your hair and take super care of it right from the start, so when it is long, it's extra beautiful. :)
Hang in there!

[bunzfan]

I started to grow my hair out from a pixie to and i got the same comments..my mum even said but you look so much prettier with short hair but because i am stubborn i just ignored them all, you carry on in a few months it will be so much easier clips are great to.

[tanya222]

I grew out from a pixie too so I know how you feel! The awkward stages were a PITA for me too, but I got by with those el cheapo plastic headbands (this was mid-90's) that hurt behind my ears! Nowadays there's lots of cute fabric headbands, faux suede, beaded ones, etc. Get a bunch of those, the awkward in-betweenness will pass soon enough! I guess I was lucky in one way, that most people didn't say too much negative stuff to me when I was growing out, because I looked so horrid in a pixie that I think most people I knew were probably silently thinking "thank god she's growing out that haircut" LOL Pixies suit a person if you have the face shape for it - I do not!!!! I looked like a boy.

Please hang in there! If those negative people were really your friends they would support you not make fun of you or persuade you to go back to something you don't like.

You'll be able to do ponytails in no time! Once I got to the stage where I could do a short little ponytail I looked alot better, cuter, more feminine, etc. You'll get there!

[Theobroma]

What in the world...? I had a look at your album and here's my opinion: if that photo is an accurate reflection of what your hair currently looks like then nobody has any business telling you it looks anything but good! But yes, some people just make it their business to make other people's appearance their business, don't they?

All I can say is hang in there, it's YOUR hair and it certainly looks as though it's going to be awesome when it grows out! Also, your timing for letting it grow is excellent; with the winter season coming up you'll have plenty of excuses to wear warm hats and headbands, and by the time the weather turns warmer your hair will be longer and more amenable to styling. Good luck!

[triumphator!]

You should try wigs!

[Pierre]

Here are some things I've found useful:
A pair of Dutch braids. Even short hair is long enough to reach one of the two braids.
A pair of Ficcare MiniMaxes. I used to wear them at my temples to keep the hair out of my eyes.
Flexi-8s. They're pretty, they hold tight, and they come in all sorts of designs. I now wear tiny Flexis on my temples and bigger ones behind.
Buffs. They're good for protecting your hair at night, hiding it at day, keeping warm (the Polar), and being seen at night (the Reflector).

[Fairlight63]

I just looked at your picture in your profile & your hair is really pretty. Don't let anyone tell you that you should cut it. I got the same thing - from my DH & daughter, you should cut your hair - it makes you look old - I said "I am old, I am 65" He still every once in a while will tell me that I should cut it, but he has about given up. Just ignore all the advice & do what you want with your hair. If they are really your friends they will like you if you have short hair or long hair.

Your hair is about the same length that mine was when I decided to grow mine long. I used head bands a lot when my bangs got long enough to be a pain. When the back got long enough to put in a pony tail I used cloth scrunchies. Before you know it your hair will be long.

[nemileo]

It is so weird that some people think they could tell other people what to do or not to do...I often experience that people I dont even know that well comment my piercings or tatooes to tell me that I should remove it. Or that I should wear my hair up or down. If it is someone really close, or you ask for their opinion it is ok, but I really hope you go with what you think is best and dont bother about comments from other people. I guess people are just afraid of changes.:p

[luxepiggy]

People in general, I think, dislike change - don't let them discourage you!

"Keep Calm and Carry On" (^(oo)^)v

[tinti]

When I grew out my short hair I used to have a zig-zag headband that made me lok like I had cornrows or something, like this
http://www.splitting-images.com/beckham.jpg

Then I would take the rest of my hair and arrange it in sort of an updo thing so that there were nothing sticking up or anything. That may be something to think about :)

Or you could use hats or buffs. Btw, your hair looks long enough to make a half up with a medium size claw clip, like this, or higher.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi_-Pwr02uE
Btw, I can't see any "wings" in your photo, I don't understand what your friends are talking about :)

[crystal_89]

I'm growing out a pixie with wavy hair, I either use a straightening iron to tame my wings or I wear a stubby funny little ponytail with lots of bobby pins. A little girl at work once said "Mummy, why does that lady have so many pins in her hair?" and I was a little embarassed, but I'm using less pins now. Hang in there and it will grow. If you cut now, you will just have to go through the same process in a few months when you decide to grow it again.

[<3OnHerSleeve]

I was teased by my "friends" and cousins when my hair was shaved off. Not particularly good for one who was entering into the awkward teen stage, and had to have a lot of guts to have her hair shaved off as a last resort to getting rid of lice. Growing out hair is nothing to be ashamed of, and it annoys me that people make light of something that's really important to you.
So I say: spite them and do what you really want to do. It's not fair if they are being unsupportive of you.

[McFearless]

Screw what other people think. If you don't like your hair thats one thing, but if you don't like your hair because someone else doesn't...well thats just silly. All I can say is don't take things so personally and don't be affected by what other people say.

[EdG]

You're in the "awkward stage". It's only temporary.

You'll get plenty of support here. :)
Ed

[punkcatknitter]

Listen to everyone here and ignore the rest of the world. I looked at your pic and your hair looks super cute right now to me. I personally think the super short pixie (my mom calls it helmet head) that 75% of the 30 and up population insists on having is incredibly ugly and unflattering, but I keep my mouth shut and don't tell them that. :P

I grew my hair out from a bob and let me tell you, I HATE everything in between the bob and BSL. Hate it. With a passion. And I didn't even know about most of the cute hair things I've learned about here, I just used those nasty claw clips and wore it up all the time. And you know what? It was totally worth it. Every time I let my hair down now it makes me smile.

And if you haven't had long hair before (or in a long time) people just might be used to you at this length. I'm willing to be most of them will shut up after awhile. And if they don't, everyone here will help you with some awesome comebacks to shut them up yourself.

[Cereus]

Yes, I remember the days of having bobby pins stuck everywhere. Looking back it was actually only for a short time. I'd say let that hair grow!

[Demetrue]

Hmmm - who are these people who are being so critical and judgmental towards you? Can you distance yourself from them? I can't believe that others think they have a right to make negative comments about your appearance.

[Dragon]

Dont worry about what other people say and please dont give in again. You have got heaps of support on here :)

[yvsa]

Thank you all for the nice reply's and the advice:grouphug:.
It means a lot to me.
The people who are the most judgmental are sadly the people who are the most close to me. My mother and husband. They are really a pain now and then. There are some friends to but that is more teasing and I can handle that of course. But I really want to succeed in my hairgrowing journey this time so I will hang in there.

Again; thank you very much for your kind words and support:).