Lifeless hair

[x0h_bother]

Hi All,
My hair has returned to the lifeless state it was in when I got here to LHC earlier this year. Yes, it was damaged by a flat iron, but it has never been this fragile before. It is dull no matter if I cone, if I didnt use cones it went to this state, and cones had fixed it, but now no matter what I use, moisture or cones, here it sits fragile, frizzy, frail. I don't flat iron anymore and I don't trim as often. The only thing that seems to help is coconut oil, but it lasts a day and a half and then back to lifeless limp hair. Is it the weather, perhaps my hair hates spring and fall?? I'm at my witts end, I think I am going to bun it for eternity!! :justy:

[ericthegreat]

I hate to say it but it certainly looks like you have damaged your hair with all that constant ironing. Once hair is damaged to the degree that you are describing where nothing helps, not extra moisture treatments or coney conditioners or even coconut oil, then its simply damage that is beyond repair. At this point, the best thing for you to do if you really want to rid yourself of the damage is to cut it off. Cut off all the parts of your hair that are damaged and start over again growing from scratch. I know its not what you want to hear, but it is the best thing for you to do at this point.

[Adora Belle]

I have to agree with ericthegreat, but I don't think you need to chop it all off. Just keep babying your hair, do a lot of deep treatments, or just keep oiling and slowly trim until all of the damage is cut out. I'm on a whole out of sight out of mind kick, so I just bun and forget about it most of the time.

Also have you tried clarifying before you do anything else? I know my hair gets fussy and dull and won't do anything and after I clarify it goes back to being nice.

Good luck! Hopefully you figure it out soon.

[bumblebums]

Yep, it's probably damaged beyond repair. Ironing kills hair; I've done it to mine!

If you don't want to cut it all off, you can wear it up most of the time and trim the ends off gradually while maintaining your current length. But it is pretty unlikely to look good for a while. The good news is that even if you ironed your entire length, the hair closer to your scalp is probably in better condition than the ends are. The ends, being older, are necessarily more damaged and less resilient, so trimming off even just a few inches can bring some life back to your hair.

[xoxophelia]

My guess is based on your albums, that you are just being too hard on yourself. When you look around you see people standing under lights or the sun and the shine gets picked up by that but this doesn't happen so much in front of a bathroom mirror. Not saying your hair is very shiny, but it may be far from as dull as you think it is.

When I first joined here I had also damaged my hair from heat styling (and coloring/chlorine/sun). It was very dull and without heat honestly horrible. But that hair that was painfully dull .. I mean seriously.. it was bad... is getting much better from just having a long time to rest. It is nowhere near the health of my LHC roots but by doing small trims and waiting it has improved a lot. You can't turn back the clock on damage but I really do think you can improve it to an extent. The shingles of the hair can start to cling tighter to the cortex from what I have seen which will increase shine.

My advice then would be to pretty much do what I have done because it has been working well for me so far. I have probably trimmed about half of my growth, I don't really heat style it (light blow drying maybe once every other month), wash it about 2-3 times a week, and other than that I mostly leave it alone. Pretty gentle etc. That and time has been enough to improve the condition and I only use VO5 conditioner.

[luckyduck]

I apply a small amount of coconut oil every day! It makes a huge difference with my hair. I start applying oil once my hair is clean and dry, if I do it while it is wet, it feels dry and brittle, but if I wait until it is dry, it feels soft and smooth. All you need is a very small amount, but every day might really help.

[Luckysock]

I'm wondering about a protein treatment... might be worth a shot

[Carolyn]

My hair will go through phases of looking good and looking like crap. Most of the time I can't find a real reason for the crappy phases. I would suggest using a clarifying shampoo followed by a nice heavy moisture deep treatment. The protein treatment is also a good suggestion. Sometimes bunning it and waiting it out is the only thing to do.

[Curlsgirl]

I also have "crappy phases" LOL! In fact I am going through one right now. I never seem to think it looks good, haven't really all summer. I got layers and really don't like them very much so I am thinking that's what it is for me but I also go through times like that when my hair seems to just turn against me. Sometimes clarifying REALLY helps and that's what comes to mind when you say dull lifeless hair. When mine is damaged it's more puffy and frizzy than dull and lifeless. Definitely try a good clarifying and deep moisture treatments or a nice trim before doing anything drastic.

[Henrietta]

I do not believe that your hair is so damaged by flat ironing that it cannot be repaired. No. Because I like your hair too much. Lalalalala... :lala: And because your newest picture in "Hair journey" album says everything- I am in love with those waves and shine. Your hair can be cured. So I won't believe in the "unrepairable damage" theory. No. End of discussion.

I blame weather for the mess. It's not about the fact that your hair is damaged. Even the healthiest (I had no idea that such word exists;) ), silky smooth 1a hair would look and behave weird if the weather is weird. So it's not damage! It's just a behaviour, temporary insanity.

I have autumn here now too. *sigh* Lots if rain. So:

*Scalp massages should help. I know it's not funny, because we have to wait a few weeks to see the effects but it is worth trying. Stimulating the scalp should make things better.
*For more... instant results- try to keep conditioner as long as possible on your hair. I keep mine 30+ minutes under a shower cap and a winter hat to keep the warmth close to my head. This simple thing can really help. After keeping my hair loaded with heavy, dense, rich condish and under a cap and winter hat it's so slippery as it was when I was using cones!
*Maybe you need to clarify? Maybe it's because of cones build up? Even if you don't have any possible build up you may clarify your hair to "start over" and just after that load it with a heavy conditioner with or without cones or any mix of natural oils. I believe that deep treatments work better on just clarified hair. At least in my case it works this way.
*In the meantime, when you'll be waiting for the effects, keep it up. Modified "bunning it for eternity" idea.

*Go to the bathroom, look in the mirror and smile. Because everything is fine, right? It's just your hair's bad mood. It is not damaged. I am serious. Go on and smile.
And then look at your hair, objectively, and I believe you will smile too. It is fine. It has some bad days but you can help it!

[Arianwen]

You don't have to chop your hair off, you can keep growing to goal (assuming you're not already there) and either:

A. do little trims here and there till you reach goal

or

B. do S&D until you reach goal, then maintain at goal by getting trims. Eventually, the iron-fried parts will disappear.

That said, I have bad hair days, yesterday was one of them, my ends were DRRYYYY so I dampened the length and applied olive oil and coconut oil. Much better today.

[x0h_bother]

My guess is based on your albums, that you are just being too hard on yourself. When you look around you see people standing under lights or the sun and the shine gets picked up by that but this doesn't happen so much in front of a bathroom mirror. Not saying your hair is very shiny, but it may be far from as dull as you think it is.

Thanks for the perspective, you are probably right.

I apply a small amount of coconut oil every day! It makes a huge difference with my hair. I start applying oil once my hair is clean and dry, if I do it while it is wet, it feels dry and brittle, but if I wait until it is dry, it feels soft and smooth. All you need is a very small amount, but every day might really help.
It does help, it's the only thing!

I'm wondering about a protein treatment... might be worth a shot
I tried this and at first it was snarky and snappy, but today it is nice. That is typical of my experience with protein and my hair, the stregnthening effects come later.

My hair will go through phases of looking good and looking like crap. Most of the time I can't find a real reason for the crappy phases.

I also have "crappy phases" LOL! In fact I am going through one right now. I never seem to think it looks good, haven't really all summer. I got layers and really don't like them very much so I am thinking that's what it is for me but I also go through times like that when my hair seems to just turn against me. Sometimes clarifying REALLY helps and that's what comes to mind when you say dull lifeless hair. When mine is damaged it's more puffy and frizzy than dull and lifeless. Definitely try a good clarifying and deep moisture treatments or a nice trim before doing anything drastic.
Thanks for this, I'm glad I'm not alone in the phases!
Clarifying and my hair are not friends.

I do not believe that your hair is so damaged by flat ironing that it cannot be repaired. No. Because I like your hair too much. Lalalalala... :lala: And because your newest picture in "Hair journey" album says everything- I am in love with those waves and shine. Your hair can be cured. So I won't believe in the "unrepairable damage" theory. No. End of discussion.

I blame weather for the mess. It's not about the fact that your hair is damaged. Even the healthiest (I had no idea that such word exists;) ), silky smooth 1a hair would look and behave weird if the weather is weird. So it's not damage! It's just a behaviour, temporary insanity.

I have autumn here now too. *sigh* Lots if rain. So:

*Scalp massages should help. I know it's not funny, because we have to wait a few weeks to see the effects but it is worth trying. Stimulating the scalp should make things better.
*For more... instant results- try to keep conditioner as long as possible on your hair. I keep mine 30+ minutes under a shower cap and a winter hat to keep the warmth close to my head. This simple thing can really help. After keeping my hair loaded with heavy, dense, rich condish and under a cap and winter hat it's so slippery as it was when I was using cones!
*Maybe you need to clarify? Maybe it's because of cones build up? Even if you don't have any possible build up you may clarify your hair to "start over" and just after that load it with a heavy conditioner with or without cones or any mix of natural oils. I believe that deep treatments work better on just clarified hair. At least in my case it works this way.
*In the meantime, when you'll be waiting for the effects, keep it up. Modified "bunning it for eternity" idea.

*Go to the bathroom, look in the mirror and smile. Because everything is fine, right? It's just your hair's bad mood. It is not damaged. I am serious. Go on and smile.
And then look at your hair, objectively, and I believe you will smile too. It is fine. It has some bad days but you can help it!
You're sweet! Thanks for the compliments. I agree weather is to blame! And your method of deep treating is a great one, I will try it.

Thanks all!!!! :blossom: