starting to understand the urge to cut

[juliaxena]

It must be because after shoulder lenght hair seems to be stuck there forever! Plus my hair is silky and stick straight, hasn't got enough volume for my taste and gets stringy second day after wash. Despite some lenght gain I can't do anything with it because it is too slippery to let me do something. It just gets in the way. People love the shine but if only they knew how unsubordinate it is. Honestly when my hair was short all I had to do was wash it and it looked just fine. So how do I cope and when will it get better? I detest pony tails by now. Everything else either doesn't work or I just don't like it... I really had to vent because along with more natural color my hair is starting to feel very boring. So how do I keep from cutting it?

[lillylonghair]

I just look at the articles section and see all of the pretty styles I know I will be able to do some day!


Also,hair accessories are you friend right now. Headbands,cute clips and bobby pins.

[jera]

I just look at the articles section and see all of the pretty styles I know I will be able to do some day!


Also,hair accessories are you friend right now. Headbands,cute clips and bobby pins.

I agree. Keep positive and motivated and think of all the things you'll be able to do when your hair is really longer. Think of all the compliments you'll get on its length. :) Buy yourself some hairtoys now and keep them in visible places to help you resist the urge to cut. You can do it. :D

I'd kill to have shiny hair like yours. Mine is so dry. :o

[Kelly728]

While my hair isn't straight/slippery like yours, I totally understand the shoulder length frustrations. I'm extremely limited on what I can do with my hair, especially because of the shorter layers I have. I'm dealing with that annoying "flip" right now, where my hair seems like it would rather point up towards the sky.

[Carolyn]

How about headbands and small barrettes or claw clips for half ups? There is always the peacock twist. I'm seeing some very cute braided things being done. Don't despair. It will get better. Another couple inches will make a big difference. I think your hair is gorgeous and would love your straightness.

[loralie]

If you really feel the urge to cut, and it needs more shape, why not try some long layers? It might help give your fine hair some texture and definition.

I don't think I could ever go without layers, I love the way they look in my hair... all one length is too limp on me.

Your hair is gorgeous! Don't be down about it :flowers:

[plainjanegirl]

I'll trade my longer hair for your shiny straight hair. Your hair looks great ! I wore headbands alot when mine was short and also cute clips from places like Claire's.

[Addy]

Your siggy pic is gorgeous! From the looks of it, it also looks flawless! Keep growing girl!!! You can do it!!!!!!!!! :cheese:

[Roseate]

Do you remember what inspired you to grow your hair in the first place? Maybe think back on that, if you have a picture of your inspiration put it up somewhere you can see it every so often.

The shoulder-to-APL lengths can be so blah, but if you cut and decide to grow again, you'll only have to spend more time at this length in the future. Power through it once, and you'll be past it and never have to deal with it again!

Also, make sure to enjoy styles like tucked french braid, French twist, Gibson tuck, peacock twist- you will grow out of these pretty soon, so take advantage of your shorter length while you can.

[Speck]

...don't....answer....thread.... stop... fingers.....from.....typing!.... GAH!... :blueeek:


I WANNA CUT MY HAIR SO BAD I CAN'T STAND IT!


....whew! there. I said it.

I know the feeling. All I do lately is look at peoples heads. I don't even hear what they say half the time. On my TV I have the option of rewinding what I'm watching and I do so too, just to see the hair styles that passed by. :( I've got it bad.

I swear ... If I had a good pair of scissors I'd be cutting it myself. :scissors:



I'll be dreaming tonight I'm sure... snip snip snip...

[trillcat]

Step away from the scissors, just step away.
Think of your hair not as a goal, but a journey.
The process of growing hair is quite tiresome at times, when you don't have the hair you want to have, well it sucks.
I would love to have stick straight slippy hair, but that is not going to happen anymore.
I would love to be a natural blonde again, also, not going to happen.
So I deal with the hair I have been given. Oh yes I cuss at it, and sleep in condish towel wrapped, amuses my cat to no end, she loves rolling around on the towel. but I will not cut it off.
Why? with all this trouble it causes, I am not sure, but I love long hair.
When I hit goal which is classic, I may do a big chop, but till then I grow.

[Chiara]

I'm at shoulder length too- I share your pain, it seems to have been there FOREVER. I am sure that chin to shoulder was much faster! The only non-pony updo that I can rely on is a peacock twist, held in place by a barrette. Anything else generally slips out. What I am enjoying is that I don't have to worry about the ends going in on one side and out on the other side, which I did before. They still do that, but it just doesn't look so obvious anymore.

[09robiha]

Im totally here will you. I never understood why people had the urge to cut so much..until it happened to me. The temptation for a cute, curly bob is really strong right now and you know what I did. I went out and bought myself some new hair clips and a few new bandanas. Changing it up alittle really helps.

[Katze]

shoulder length is a VERY awkward length for many people. This seems to be why many people never grow longer than this length!

When I was at shoulder I was growing out bleach, too, so I had two toned hair as well. I put it into a LOT of French braids and half-ups which helped disguise the color and added some interest. Mini braids are 'in' right now and can look cool, same with messy side or English braids, and the latter would take some length off, too.

your hair is pretty and a lovely color, and be grateful you have shine, too! Some of us don't. :)

[Nini]

Since I can't remember having hair this length I don't know how much help I'll be. But...

I don't know your routine, but I stopped using SLS and cones way back. When I occationally clarify my hair ends up babyfine, and I can't get it to stay in something as basic as a braid. The buns that usually holds up perfectly the whole suddenly has to be redone every couple of hours.

So maybe it's time to look into your routine again?!? It's worth a shot anyways. And if you still want to cut in the end that's fine too, but giving it some time is always a good thing:)

[alwayssmiling]

I was determined not to cut my hair since christmas 2009. Just let it grow and tie it back. It has grown pretty fast as the back but the sides have only grown 2" since christmas. I decided at the weekend I had to cut the back because I never liked wearing it down because of this huge step!

So I did 1 1/2 inches yesterday and boy does it look better - shorter - but neater and pretty. I would have been better doing small trims each month to keep it looking good. Back to growing.

Any tips on getting the sides to be stronger would be appreicated!

[juliaxena]

I really do not mean to be a whiner, but somehow flexi8 barettes damage my hair, they bend it. If I don't use them, I have no problems with bent ends. Same goes for other barettes and clips. I can't aford cute at my work. Halfups don't really work-my hair looks thin, as well as it would with layers. Peacoc twist doesn't work because my hair sticks up instead of falling down. And did you know arms start hurting a lot when you have tryed (and failed) to braid your hair for the third time?

I'd LOVE curls but other than curling iron I know of no fast and effective method.

If only my hair GREW 3 inches right now.

At least I have you guys tring to help. Thank you all so much.

[Pixna]

juliaxena, I can appreciate your frustration. I have two suggestions: (1) consider coloring your hair a color you find more exciting -- having some fun with your hair will take your mind off it not yet being the length you want, and (2) talk with some people here who have the same hair type as you and have gotten "oven the hump" in terms of the frustrating length(s). Two people I'd suggest are Chrissy and Franny G. (hopefully they will post here). They've been members here a long, long time, have been through the ups and downs with their hair, and have the same hair texture you do -- and their hair is looking gorgeous (as is yours, by the way!).

Hang in there! Although my hair is totally different from yours, I understanding how hard it is to get through the tough stages. Oh, and one more suggestion -- try focusing on something other than your hair. Get into cooking, or exercising, or makeup, or some other way of taking care of yourself and loving yourself until you can get past this. :grouphug:

[juliaxena]

Thanks Pixna. To change my color all I would have to do is wash it a couple of times. I started putting a semi on my hair that is very close to my natural color. My lenght is dyed lighter originally though. For now, I don't need to touch up roots because they are not visible. Would I like it lighter again? Not really. I'd like it completely white, really platinum blonde, because I don't see that as blonde anymore because it looks so unreal. But as you can imagine that would be extremly damaging, a real no no... I'm not into darker colors or reds...

I have great respect for Franny, she seems like a miracle worker, I don't know if I can get my hair to behave like that.

It's just that I feel like highschool again...I always saw my hair as really boring, limp, greasy and flat...argh...

[Pixna]

It's just that I feel like highschool again...I always saw my hair as really boring, limp, greasy and flat...argh...

I guess we always want what we can't have. I'd like to be tall, but I don't think that's going to happen in this lifetime (unfortunately). :smirk:

Truthfully, I don't see your hair the way you see it at all. It looks golden, angelic, shiny, and special. Naturally straight hair is quite uncommon -- many women flat-iron their hair to try to get what you have. YOUR hair is actually what a lot of other people want! I know it doesn't feel like that to you now, but it is beautiful and will only be more beautiful as it gets longer and you can show off its full glory. When my hair was SL (not all that long ago), I avoided looking in mirrors (and at my reflection in windows) as much as possible, and when I did and was dissatisfied with my hair, I just told myself what a good friend would, "This stage will pass. Hang in there. You've got the strength to do so, and you'll be glad you did." And guess what? It did ... and I am, and I know you will be too.

[juliaxena]

I guess we always want what we can't have.

Guess you are right there :)

My hair is not really golden, it's more close to dark silver. I have had totally white hair. That was when it felt angelic to me lol but of course, the state of it was absoltely horrible. My color is what some would call dishwater blonde really.

[Pixna]

My hair is not really golden, it's more close to dark silver. I have had totally white hair. That was when it felt angelic to me lol but of course, the state of it was absoltely horrible. My color is what some would call dishwater blonde really.

Having silver hair is becoming more popular among young people, and it can look really cool. Lilly Scott from American Idol (if you watched it last season) had silver/white hair and it really suited her. I wonder if there's a way to get it without damaging your hair.

[Tabihito]

Unfortunately, shoulder length is just a really, really bad place to be. It's unpleasant in the extreme. In some regards, though, you can count yourself lucky- due to your hair type, you don't suffer from "triangle head" as some of us do/did, though it does present its own challenges.

I recommend thinking about all the new things you'll be able to do with your hair as it grows, and consider how few options you would have if you cut it. Short hair, depending on your cut, can only be styled in a couple of different ways. Sure, there are different styles for different cuts, but each individual cut has few options. With long hair, though, the possible variations are almost infinite.

It's about as annoying a length as they come; I maintain that it's worse than anything between peach fuzz and chin length. But it, like all lengths before it, will eventually pass.

[juliaxena]

Having silver hair is becoming more popular among young people, and it can look really cool. Lilly Scott from American Idol (if you watched it last season) had silver/white hair and it really suited her. I wonder if there's a way to get it without damaging your hair.


She looks cool but it's not like mine lol. I'm just one of those blonde babies that went darker over the years.

In my experience I had to use strong bleach to get it to be white so you can guess that did not go well lol

I wonder if using lighter conditioner would give me more body but still keep my hair damage free. I'm afraid to try that.


Somehow I'm feeling better now. Imagine that?

[Pixna]

I wonder if using lighter conditioner would give me more body but still keep my hair damage free. I'm afraid to try that.

Somehow I'm feeling better now. Imagine that?

I'm glad you're feeling better. See, everything is temporary! You'll get through it, I know you will. :redgrin:

I'm actually going conditioner free right now, something I never, ever thought I could do. I'm just using VERY diluted shampoo and, after I rinse that out, using a very diluted ACV rinse, and very, very light oil (grapeseed oil) as a leave-in. My hair has never felt better! I wonder if you could try something similar but with a lemon-juice rinse, to help lighten your hair naturally.