hair and first impressions

[Kristin]

As a teacher with a new school year approaching, I've been considering how I will dress for the first few weeks of school. I usually make a "rule" for myself that I will not dress down for X number of weeks so that the kids see me as professional, scary, etc... (I teach middle school and it is definitely better to be feared initially.)

As I was considering the impression my clothes make, I started to think about what I should do with my hair. I generally think that updos make me appear more severe, serious, and/or professional, so wearing my hair that way for the first month of school would create the desired impression on my students. But then I remembered that DBF said my hair was up when he first saw me and he thought I was "pretty and smart" (but obviously was not put-off by it).

What impressions do you think are made by different hair styles? Has anyone ever said what impression you made based on your hair? What hair style(s) do you think are the most professional/serious? What hair style(s) do you consider "fun" or casual?

[Cinnamoon]

Buns, for sure. Nice, tight, cinnamon buns. No sticks - just pins. :D

[luxepiggy]

I definitely think updos, would be considered more professional/serious overall, especially for those who have a tendency to touch their hair a lot when it's own (guilty as charged!).

When I was working in finance, I always put my hair up for meetings. Personally I prefer variations on the chignon or french twist, which I find more sophisticated than a traditional bun.

Now that I work in fashion, I wear my hair down much more frequently, but it is definitely a more casual look. Many people also say I look younger and friendlier with my hair down. Apparently when I can come off as intimidating with an updo (^(oo)^)

With very long hair, it's probably impossible to pull off a professional looking ponytail. At the very least, I've never witnessed a successful attempt!

[teela1978]

I'm with cinnamoon. I think the tight-bunned-mean-lady look is the way to go, pulled straight back into a cinnamon bun, held with pins. No-muss, no-fuss. Professional and scary! Plus its quick, and you don't even have to brush your hair to do it.

[tanya222]

Buns, for sure. Nice, tight, cinnamon buns. No sticks - just pins. :D

Soon as I read this I had a flashback vision of "Lilith" from that old show "Frasier". Always had her dark hair pulled back in severe buns, and how stern did she look :eek:

:D

[Laurenji]

French Twists. Classy, but especially if you do them tight, they still have that "severe mean lady" look that buns can, if that's what you're going for.

[pepperminttea]

Definitely something with pins, and no softening tendrils. Something like hairsticks or a pretty barrette are lovely, but for trying to scare them a bit, I'd go with sturdy pins since there's less there to comment on (and if there's something - anything - to comment on, school children will find it).

[freckles]

I definitely think any style that's completely 'up', with as little visible 'pretty stuff' (hairsticks etc) as possible is always a serious, professional style. When I want to look as conservative/serious as possible, that's what I go for.

[Medievalmaniac]

The kids do get a kick out of hairsticks. My daughter (6, so she's younger) calls mine my antennae. My students (high school) are most certainly intimidated by me - but they love the hairtoys, they always ask me to turn around so they can see what I'm wearing in my hair today.

I recommend establishing a "game" with the hair from the start - it cultivates a sort of camaraderie with the kids. Tell them you have very long hair and you love to collect special hairsticks, combs, and such to put into it, show them one (they'll be very curious, so expect to pass it around if they want to see it closer - not many people wear these!) and then segue into a discussion of their collections; then segue that into a writing assignment related to some aspect of the class that focuses on their collections. It can work for any subject, if you're clever about it.

My hair is a connection point for my students. I am not their friend, their peer, or someone who lets them get away with anything - and mainly, they are terrified of me because I'm a hard teacher - or so my reputation has it! lol But they also love to engage me in conversations, and I have found this is the sort of entry point for that - it helps them get past feeling super intimidated, gives us a fun moment sometime in class when someone thinks to ask "hey, what are you wearing in your hair today?".

To be a no-nonsense, professional teacher-type, rather than dressing the part, I have perfected The Look - it's a blank, level stare that has been known to make high school students cry. I highly recommend it. Honestly? When I level The Look at one of my students, I empty my mind entirely - I'm not thinking ANYTHING, I'm just looking at him or her. They project whatever they want to into your stare, and what they put there is fifty times scarier than what you would be putting there. It's an acting tip I picked up from watching an Anthony Hopkins interview. :)

I have found that if I try to look like a professional teacher, I'm not accessible for the kids at all - there's no level of connection for them, and it becomes me versus them all year. By maintaining my high standards and using The Look when necessary, yet coupling that with my usual flowing skirts/Boho look and the hairtoys, I have struck a good center ground where I'm "weird" but "cool", but "don't try nothing in her class, Man." It works best for me, because I'm not acting the part, and I'm being authentic to who I am, thus making it fair and safe for them to also bring their own authenticity to the class - which the kids respect more than any business professional attire and severe hairstyle. :)

[triumphator!]

My freshly-hired college graduate teacher friend (lucky duck) was told not to wear any hairstyles that her students would wear every day, in order to look more professional. Like double braids, messy buns and ponytails, etc

[jasper]

As long as your hair looks "kempt" as opposed to unkempt, that will make the right impression with students. I wear my hair in updos all year for school because it is just more practical.

Teacher hair can be distracting. I am pretty sure my hair sticks annoy a fair few of my students, especially the ones getting closer to middle school age. :cheese: When they ask questions about them, they mostly start with "why?"

[Stephichan]

The kids do get a kick out of hairsticks. My daughter (6, so she's younger) calls mine my antennae. My students (high school) are most certainly intimidated by me - but they love the hairtoys, they always ask me to turn around so they can see what I'm wearing in my hair today.

I recommend establishing a "game" with the hair from the start - it cultivates a sort of camaraderie with the kids. Tell them you have very long hair and you love to collect special hairsticks, combs, and such to put into it, show them one (they'll be very curious, so expect to pass it around if they want to see it closer - not many people wear these!) and then segue into a discussion of their collections; then segue that into a writing assignment related to some aspect of the class that focuses on their collections. It can work for any subject, if you're clever about it.

My hair is a connection point for my students. I am not their friend, their peer, or someone who lets them get away with anything - and mainly, they are terrified of me because I'm a hard teacher - or so my reputation has it! lol But they also love to engage me in conversations, and I have found this is the sort of entry point for that - it helps them get past feeling super intimidated, gives us a fun moment sometime in class when someone thinks to ask "hey, what are you wearing in your hair today?".

To be a no-nonsense, professional teacher-type, rather than dressing the part, I have perfected The Look - it's a blank, level stare that has been known to make high school students cry. I highly recommend it. Honestly? When I level The Look at one of my students, I empty my mind entirely - I'm not thinking ANYTHING, I'm just looking at him or her. They project whatever they want to into your stare, and what they put there is fifty times scarier than what you would be putting there. It's an acting tip I picked up from watching an Anthony Hopkins interview. :)

I have found that if I try to look like a professional teacher, I'm not accessible for the kids at all - there's no level of connection for them, and it becomes me versus them all year. By maintaining my high standards and using The Look when necessary, yet coupling that with my usual flowing skirts/Boho look and the hairtoys, I have struck a good center ground where I'm "weird" but "cool", but "don't try nothing in her class, Man." It works best for me, because I'm not acting the part, and I'm being authentic to who I am, thus making it fair and safe for them to also bring their own authenticity to the class - which the kids respect more than any business professional attire and severe hairstyle. :)

Thanks you so much for this post! The past two years I've been involved with being a lab TA filled with people my own age. I am told that I look about 4 years younger than I am and as such I sometimes worry about getting their respect and attention in class.

[tinti]

I allways thought that a tight bun was very serious. Like, hair parted in the center, and then a cinnabun of some sort at the nape :lol:

[SurprisingWoman]

I was wearing my hair in a bun and a guy told me that I looked like his English teacher.

I do believe the buns have it!

[Nae]

I am gonna agree, for a teacher it is all in the buns...............erum. Okay that sounds wrong, lol, only on the LHC.

Anyways when I substitute I always like having my hair up without too many blingy hair toys. Two more years hopefully I will have my own bunch of middle schoolers to worry about! (If I can find a job.) I guess I really don't plan on wearing my hair down at work, I don't now and I don't see any reason to start when I am teaching my classes. But I suppose my hair toys might get more fun after the first few weeks.

[Kristin]

I teach 8th grade and my former students were definitely distracted by my hair and hair toys. (I think they are doubly distracted because I teach in a predominately African American school and they are unaccustomed to long, natural hair.) Both girls and boys make regular hair comments and I have had a few students loudly protest when I've put my hair up mid-day. I do use my hair to get the attention of the boys (the taking-my-hair-down or putting-my-hair-up technique at least gets them to LOOK at me when they are doing something else). I definitely do not want to start the year with them distracted by my hair, so I think I will be wearing it up and avoiding games or writing prompts that involve my hair.

I've heard the "don't dress or style your hair like your students" thing. It doesn't work all that well at my school, where many of the kids are low-income and dressing-up only alienates them. Their behavior is much better controlled by insisting that they always follow reasonable rules, enforcing consequences consistently, and maintaining regular parent contact.

[Synthemesc]

They project whatever they want to into your stare, and what they put there is fifty times scarier than what you would be putting there. It's an acting tip I picked up from watching an Anthony Hopkins interview. :)


That's just awesome, and I know I had that one used on me more than once by my physics teacher. :)

I think a fully rolled sock bun looks pretty severe. We were made to wear them in ballet at college, and I remember looking round the first day and thinking "yeesh, we look like we mean business".

[Sisko]

Janeway's 'do in ST: Voyager always comes to mind when I think of this setting.

[CourtneyBee]

Some of my relatives are police officers, everyone always joke with my cousin for showing up to her court appearances wearing the b%^&# bun!

[hairg33k]

I always think of updo's as more serious hairstyles, and when you were your hair down as more of a care-free look. I think that braids always look cutesy, if you do two. But if you do a single braid or a braided bun it looks elegant. A peacock twist I think of as a more fun updo because the hair is flippy. That's just my take on a few hairstyles :)

[donna'sdaughter]

(I think they are doubly distracted because I teach in a predominately African American school and they are unaccustomed to long, natural hair.)

I do use my hair to get the attention of the boys (the taking-my-hair-down or putting-my-hair-up technique at least gets them to LOOK at me when they are doing something else).

Their behavior is much better controlled by insisting that they always follow reasonable rules, enforcing consequences consistently, and maintaining regular parent contact.


I hope I don't create a rift between myself and the other women on this board, but I most definitely have to agree with you and I'll tell you why.

1.) Many African American children are not unaccustomed to seeing long hair. (I am African American and have seen many long haired women in my community (although very few are natural). From a cultural perspective, many AA students WILL NOT look you in the eyes and it is because it is considered a form of respect for elders and authority figures in our culture. Did they miss that fact in your Diversity course?

2.) African American children (and other minority children) are not any different in terms of learning ability, than any other child you might come in contact with. If anything, their "behavior" might stem from their initial distrust of those who appear to be "outside" of the Black community), and believe me- the suit you choose to wear has nothing to do with it. As a "product" of inner city Chicago, I can tell you that these children come to school with so much on their minds, and I doubt if what you're wearing means anything to them.

p.s. I'm saddened that someone who teaching in the type of community that I grew up in has such a shallow view of my culture. They already know that you you have low expectations of them and that's exactly what they give you.

[donna'sdaughter]

edit: DISAGREE

[Hacksaw007]

Up in a bun does it for me, had a teacher who taught typing and she did that with her red hair. She was tough but I did learn how to type (2 years of it).

[ghost]

A plain, tight, no-hair-out-of-place bun is very professional looking and I suppose could be intimidating to middle schoolers -think Professor McGonagall! (Harry Potter).

I take ballet, and we all wear our hair like this to class. The effect is very severe even in street clothes -so much so that if I'm wearing a tight bun outside of class, I go out of my way to make sure I wear some kind of camisole top or shrug...something that says 'ballerina' rather than 'schoolmarm,' because that seems to be how people interpret it right away.

[ghost]

Also: to the person who suggested The Look -you're spot on.
Didn't that come from when Anthony Hopkins was talking about Hannibal Lecter?
I had a couple teachers who had The Look in their arsenal, and I'll tell you, no matter WHAT their hair looked like...getting the Hannibal Lecter stare was pretty intimidating.

One of the teachers I respected most, though, was actually quite a bit like a few of the students. He and I shared a love of Gothic fashion and liked a lot of the same music, but he was serious about his subject and about being respected as a teacher. I would NEVER have acted up in his class, because I liked him, I liked being in his class, and I respected his dedication to trying to hammer Hamlet into the brains of a classful of kids that (mostly) just wanted to be off doing anything else. Of course, not every student is the same...some of my classmates were pretty awful to him :( And middle schoolers...I think anyone who teaches middle school is pretty brave! Your idea of being strict at first is probably your best bet -there'll be time later to develop a rapport.

[x0h_bother]

I hope I don't create a rift between myself and the other women on this board, but I most definitely have to agree with you and I'll tell you why.

1.) Many African American children are not unaccustomed to seeing long hair. (I am African American and have seen many long haired women in my community (although very few are natural). From a cultural perspective, many AA students WILL NOT look you in the eyes and it is because it is considered a form of respect for elders and authority figures in our culture. Did they miss that fact in your Diversity course?

2.) African American children (and other minority children) are not any different in terms of learning ability, than any other child you might come in contact with. If anything, their "behavior" might stem from their initial distrust of those who appear to be "outside" of the Black community), and believe me- the suit you choose to wear has nothing to do with it. As a "product" of inner city Chicago, I can tell you that these children come to school with so much on their minds, and I doubt if what you're wearing means anything to them.

p.s. I'm saddened that someone who teaching in the type of community that I grew up in has such a shallow view of my culture. They already know that you you have low expectations of them and that's exactly what they give you.

I would have to agree with you in my education in terms of eye contact and culture. However, distrust is not the only reason for lack of eye contact. Page 7 of this article speaks to eye contact in reference to cultures. http://courses.knox.edu/psych279/barriers.pdf Specifically in reference to black culture, the article conveys that lack of eye contact can mean that attentiveness should be assumed. Other potential reasons for avoiding eye contact in other cultures are noted.

That being said, this topic may be a hijack of the thread and could be a nice addition to the boards for discussion in another spot :)