Thinking of cutting my hair

[Slowpoke]

lo new poster here.

I started growing my hair long for the first time a few years ago and it seemed to reach its limit at about 4-5 inches past my shoulders a year ago.
The problem is my hair is extremely fine and delicate and is constantly breaking.
After a year of static length the hair on the top of my head has broken so much and often theres now a big mass of short-medium hairs in a halo (that seems to be the right word here) around my head thats very untidy and generally a real pain. The front especially as it gets in my eyes and face.

I dont want to cut my hair, but I dont know if I can tolerate it like this.
Any help appreciated.

[heidihug]

Hi, slowpoke. What's your hair care routine? That would help us give you advice.

[florenonite]

Is your hair dry? If so you could try CWC (Condition the length, shampoo the scalp, rinse it all out, then use a heavier conditioner on the length) or CO washes (there's an article in the articles section on that) as well as deep treatments (for instance SMT, which you can find in the Recipes section). You can also try oiling, both heavy oilings before a wash and lighter oiling on damp hair after washing. In addition, how often do you wash your hair? You could try taking an extra day between washings to allow your natural oils to coat your hair.

HTH!

[lora410]

I don't think cuttign will solve any of your problems. In a few years you may face the same thing. So instead of cutting try and fix what might be causing the damage. For instance if you are blowdrying and straightening that may be your obvious answer.As heidibugsaid we need to know more about your routine.

[Patrycja]

do you use chemical dyes? I know when I was frying my hair with those(still use chemical dyes but I was dying two times a month,I had a huge addiction)I had the worse halo problems.Also,do you use a hair dryer?That can be the main culprit to dry damaged hair.Sulfate shampoo also tends to destroy hair,but not everyones.The key is to find your nich with your routine.It can take awhile-I'm still finding mine :)

[spidermom]

I don't do anything damaging to my hair and it's in good condition. However, I have a halo of shorter hairs. Everybody does. Old hairs shed out, new hairs grow in.

[Anje]

I think you came to the right place....

Honestly, I don't think cutting will solve your problems. It might fix the splits at the bottom of your hair, but if you've got lots of breakage going up to your scalp, I think you need to look at how you're treating your hair. You should be able to maintain a length with at least a few trims a year without having it all break off, regardless of length.

I see you've put down that your hair is curly. Do you straighten or relax it? Both cause lots of damage, though we have a few folks around here who use relaxers to great success. (My personal opinion is that everyone looks best with the hair texture they have naturally, but many people disagree.)

Is your hair dry? Many of us fight dryness, and there are a number of steps you can take to eliminate it. Clarifying hair is a good start (allows moisture in, but will certainly dry it more), and there are a number of treatments, such as oils and deep conditioning treatments like SMT (check the recipes section) that will help.

Also, tell us in great detail how you wash and style it, as well as how often you wash. You'll get lots more suggestions and help once we know what you're doing.

[Slowpoke]

Thanks for the responses.

My routine is pretty simple. I wash every other day mostly, with shampoo on the scalp then rinse that and put conditioner on all over.
The only other treatment ive used is coconut oil which was recommended to me by a friend. I put it on before washing then sometimes after when the hair was dry. To be honest I couldn't tell if it was doing anything.

I have always had a dry scalp but I do not know if my hair itself is dry.
I dont do anything else to my hair, no dying, no straigthening, rarely use styling products etc.
I do not blow dry, once washed I tamp it with a towel, put it in a pony tail then let it dry itself.
On top it naturally dries fairly straight but from the back of the headit starts tangling then curling into the length of the pony tail.

It seems to me from my novice perspective that I have unusualy delicate hair.
I cant really brush or comb it even with those big teeth soft edge combs. As soon as they hit the tangles hair immedietly starts breaking.
So ive adopted the approach of leaving it alone as much as possible with the idea of minimising damage.

If I left anything out ill edit it in :).

[Kirin]

some of your damage could in itself be from the ponytail and having it that way while drying. One of my daughters was having this problem and a matting/knotting problem just above and below the ponytail holder. She also had halo breakage.

Instead of a pony, try a braid, or, let it dry loose then put it up or braid it. If you dont like bunning or braids, try just twisting the hair and pinning it up with a claw clip or something while slightly damp but not wet.

Some hair (like mine) does NOT like being manipulated, put up or having any clips pins or scrunchies on it while wet. I too have VERY fine delicate hair.

I highly recommend a treatment such as 1/2 cup conditioner with 1/4 teaspoon coconut oil, and 1/4 teaspoon olive oil, applied to freshly washed hair, and wrapped in saran wrap and let to "steep" for at least an hour. I'd try that once or twice a week. If the treatment leaves you greasy its okay to do a gentle wash and condition after (i do) and it doesnt hinder the treatment at all.

Also check for silicone and protein in your products, protein fore sure you should watch out for. Protein dries out my scalp and totally fries and frazzles my hair and makes it "snap" too easy.

[prosperina]

Maybe you shouldn't let it dry in a ponytail. That could be causing breakage even if you are using a "hair friendly" elastic with no metal it could rub on your delicate wet hair.

Perhaps you could try a protective leave in.

What kind of conditioner and shampoo are you using? Maybe you need cones or don't need cones. Cones are silicone products in conditioner. Some people like them others hate them.

[spidermom]

I second or third the advice to stop putting it into a ponytail while it's wet. Wet hair is the most delicate state because water temporarily disrupts the hydrogen bonds, making it very prone to over-stretching and breakage. Try leaving it loose to air dry or putting it into a loose braid.

[k_hepburn]

Have you seen Teacherbear's article on gentle handling (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=8)? That's probably a good starting point for you to ensure that your routine is as hair friendly as possible. I also second (third, fourth) the suggestion that if you think that a lot of your hairs are breaking off around chin length, then putting your hair in a ponytail regularly may be contributing to your problems. Doing it when your hair is still wet would obviously make damage from the elastic even more likely.

Greetings

katharine

[MakeItADouble]

I agree - the pony tail may be doing more damage than you'd think.

I typically let my hair air dry for a while. Once it is almost dry, you can put it up in a bun, but I would avoid ponytails every day.

[Elbereth]

I too have fine and delicate hair. But with advice I have learned on these boards, I have grown it to waist length. It is in great condition and still growing. I agree with the others: cutting doesn't solve anything. Only by slowly trying out new haircare habits can you figure out why your hair gives you trouble and begin to prevent it. Almost everyone has potential to grow her hair longer than just past shoulder length.

I strongly suspect that your shampoo or conditioner might be too harsh for your hair. It is possible that sulphates (washing agents found on most commercial shampoos) strip your hair. You could try CO (conditioner only) wash, or soap based shampoos. They are gentler alternatives for washing your hair. Also, you should try to prolong the interval between washes. Every other day is quite often. Perhaps sometimes all your hair needs is a rinse with plain water?

Updos are a must for delicate hair. If you can put your hair up in any way, do so(and by putting it up I mean "proper" updos, not ponytails or braids). If your hair is on shorter side, claw clips and such are easy and fun to wear. Also, protect your hair from sun and from cold by wearing a hat or a scarf. There are hair products that contain sunscreen, but those products also tend to contain not-so-nice chemicals, so mechanical protection is better.

[spidermom]

Soaps are not more gentle. They are alkaline pH and force the cuticle open. The tighter and flatter your cuticle stays, the more healthy and shiny your hair will be. Hair/scalp prefers an acid pH.

Try diluting your shampoo and washing CWC style. Once I learned to do this, my problem of ends drying out improved about 1000%.

[Slowpoke]

Thanks for the tips

Ill definitely stop putting my hair in a pony tail when wet and let it air dry loose.

I use regular off the shelf shampoo/conditioner. I tried co only once but it made my hair to waxy and stiff.

[Blueglass]

Could it be diet, or thyroid issues?

[Anje]

Another suggestion -- many people (myself included) tend to brush/comb their hair more roughly than they should. If you hold your hair in your hand while you comb/brush it to stop it from tugging on your roots, you're probably too violent. The goal is to eliminate all the hair breaking sounds, which can be tough, particularly for delicate, curly, fine, or tangle-prone hair, and you might have all those.

See if you can get by with fingercombing only. Quite a lot of folks with very wavy and curly hair do quite well that way.

[MusicLady]

Are you using a brush on your hair? If you have curly hair, this could be contributing to hair breakage and loss. Curly hair also needs really gentle treatment. I only use a pick or wide seamless comb on my hair, and only when it is wet with some conditioners and detanglers in it. Some people only comb out their hair in the shower with it full of conditioner and the water running on it.

[Slowpoke]

Nope I dont use brushes or combs, just my fingers. I try to be as gentle as possible.

I have no idea about diet or thyroids :).

[florenonite]

Another suggestion -- many people (myself included) tend to brush/comb their hair more roughly than they should. If you hold your hair in your hand while you comb/brush it to stop it from tugging on your roots, you're probably too violent. The goal is to eliminate all the hair breaking sounds, which can be tough, particularly for delicate, curly, fine, or tangle-prone hair, and you might have all those.

See if you can get by with fingercombing only. Quite a lot of folks with very wavy and curly hair do quite well that way.

I agree. I rarely comb my hair and never brush it, and I'm not even very wavy.

[Nynaeve]

I don't think cuttign will solve any of your problems. In a few years you may face the same thing. So instead of cutting try and fix what might be causing the damage. For instance if you are blowdrying and straightening that may be your obvious answer.As heidibugsaid we need to know more about your routine.

I completely agree. It is your routine that is likely the problem, not your hair.

[Alaskanheart]

Im pretty sure (by experience) that its the ponytails while drying thats causing breakage.A few years ago I got into a habit of ponytailing damp before bed with unfriendly hair bands and I had lots of clean breakage in the area where the OP is discribing.It really doesnt take much to break fine hair.

Also you mentioned that CO made your hair waxy.I had a few problems with COing using some of the popular conditioners that alot of lhcers use.Maybe a bit more experimentation with different Conditioners and rinses might be a good idea before CO is entirely ruled out.I found that a distilled water rinse really helped after CO.Also it is usually suggested that you should clarify before starting CO, and make sure the Conditioner is a No-Cone one.Of course it doesnt work for everyone.

[Cinnamon Hair]

If your hair is as weak as you say, I'm not sure using a harsh shampoo, brushing, or ponytailing is enough to be the only cause. Have you been to a dermatologist? Maybe there is an underlying health issue causing your fine hair. I would strongly suggest getting a dr appointment to check things out. Hair shouldn't be that weak unless you are bleaching or frying it regularly.